Insteadoflettinggohedrewherclosertohim。"Tellmetheparticularsof——mymother’sdeath，"hesaidinahard，pantingwhisper；"or——I’ll——I’ll——"
　　"Clym，"sheansweredslowly，"doyouthinkyoudaredoanythingtomethatIdarenotbear？Butbeforeyoustrikemelisten。Youwillgetnothingfrommebyablow，eventhoughitshouldkillme，asitprobablywill。
　　Butperhapsyoudonotwishmetospeak——killingmaybeallyoumean？"
　　"Killyou！Doyouexpectit？"
　　"Ido。"
　　"Why？"
　　"Nolessdegreeofrageagainstmewillmatchyourpreviousgriefforher。"
　　"Phew——Ishallnotkillyou，"hesaidcontemptuously，asifunderasuddenchangeofpurpose。"Ididthinkofit；
　　but——Ishallnot。Thatwouldbemakingamartyrofyou，andsendingyoutowheresheis；andIwouldkeepyouawayfromhertilltheuniversecometoanend，ifIcould。"
　　"Ialmostwishyouwouldkillme，"saidshewithgloomybitterness。"Itiswithnostrongdesire，Iassureyou，thatIplaythepartIhavelatelyplayedonearth。
　　Youarenoblessing，myhusband。"
　　"Youshutthedoor——youlookedoutofthewindowuponher——youhadamaninthehousewithyou——yousentherawaytodie。Theinhumanity——thetreachery——Iwillnottouchyou——standawayfromme——andconfesseveryword！"
　　"Never！I’llholdmytongueliketheverydeaththatI
　　don’tmindmeeting，eventhoughIcanclearmyselfofhalfyoubelievebyspeaking。Yes。Iwill！Whoofanydignitywouldtakethetroubletoclearcobwebsfromawildman’smindaftersuchlanguageasthis？No；
　　lethimgoon，andthinkhisnarrowthoughts，andrunhisheadintothemire。Ihaveothercares。"
　　"’Tistoomuch——butImustspareyou。"
　　"Poorcharity。"
　　"Bymywretchedsoulyoustingme，Eustacia！Icankeepitup，andhotlytoo。Now，then，madam，tellmehisname！"
　　"Never，Iamresolved。"
　　"Howoftendoeshewritetoyou？Wheredoesheputhisletters——whendoeshemeetyou？Ah，hisletters！Doyoutellmehisname？"
　　"Idonot。"
　　"ThenI’llfinditmyself。"Hiseyeshadfallenuponasmalldeskthatstoodnear，onwhichshewasaccustomedtowriteherletters。Hewenttoit。Itwaslocked。
　　"Unlockthis！"
　　"Youhavenorighttosayit。That’smine。"
　　Withoutanotherwordheseizedthedeskanddashedittothefloor。Thehingeburstopen，andanumberofletterstumbledout。
　　"Stay！"saidEustacia，steppingbeforehimwithmoreexcitementthanshehadhithertoshown。
　　"Come，come！standaway！Imustseethem。"
　　Shelookedatthelettersastheylay，checkedherfeelingandmovedindifferentlyaside；whenhegatheredthemup，andexaminedthem。
　　Bynostretchofmeaningcouldanybutaharmlessconstructionbeplaceduponasingleoneofthelettersthemselves。
　　Thesolitaryexceptionwasanemptyenvelopedirectedtoher，andthehandwritingwasWildeve’s。Yeobrighthelditup。
　　Eustaciawasdoggedlysilent。
　　"Canyouread，madam？Lookatthisenvelope。Doubtlessweshallfindmoresoon，andwhatwasinsidethem。
　　Ishallnodoubtbegratifiedbylearningingoodtimewhatawell—finishedandfull—blownadeptinacertaintrademyladyis。"
　　"Doyousayittome——doyou？"shegasped。
　　Hesearchedfurther，butfoundnothingmore。"Whatwasinthisletter？"hesaid。
　　"Askthewriter。AmIyourhoundthatyoushouldtalktomeinthisway？"
　　"Doyoubraveme？doyoustandmeout，mistress？Answer。
　　Don’tlookatmewiththoseeyesifyouwouldbewitchmeagain！SoonerthanthatIdie。Yourefusetoanswer？"
　　"Iwouldn’ttellyouafterthis，ifIwereasinnocentasthesweetestbabeinheaven！"
　　"Whichyouarenot。"
　　"CertainlyIamnotabsolutely，"shereplied。"Ihavenotdonewhatyousuppose；butiftohavedonenoharmatallistheonlyinnocencerecognized，Iambeyondforgiveness。
　　ButIrequirenohelpfromyourconscience。"
　　"Youcanresist，andresistagain！InsteadofhatingyouIcould，Ithink，mournforandpityyou，ifyouwerecontrite，andwouldconfessall。ForgiveyouI
　　nevercan。Idon’tspeakofyourlover——Iwillgiveyouthebenefitofthedoubtinthatmatter，foritonlyaffectsmepersonally。Buttheother——hadyouhalf—killedme，haditbeenthatyouwilfullytookthesightawayfromthesefeebleeyesofmine，Icouldhaveforgivenyou。
　　ButTHAT’Stoomuchfornature！"
　　"Saynomore。Iwilldowithoutyourpity。ButIwouldhavesavedyoufromutteringwhatyouwillregret。"
　　"Iamgoingawaynow。Ishallleaveyou。"
　　"Youneednotgo，asIamgoingmyself。Youwillkeepjustasfarawayfrommebystayinghere。"
　　"Callhertomind——thinkofher——whatgoodnesstherewasinher——itshowedineverylineofherface！Mostwomen，evenwhenbutslightlyannoyed，showaflickerofevilinsomecurlofthemouthorsomecornerofthecheek；
　　butasforher，neverinherangriestmomentswasthereanythingmaliciousinherlook。Shewasangeredquickly，butsheforgavejustasreadily，andunderneathherpridetherewasthemeeknessofachild。Whatcameofit。？——whatcaredyou？Youhatedherjustasshewaslearningtoloveyou。
　　O！couldn’tyouseewhatwasbestforyou，butmustbringacurseuponme，andagonyanddeathuponher，bydoingthatcrueldeed！Whatwasthefellow’snamewhowaskeepingyoucompanyandcausingyoutoaddcrueltytohertoyourwrongtome？WasitWildeve？WasitpoorThomasin’shusband？Heaven，whatwickedness！Lostyourvoice，haveyou？Itisnaturalafterdetectionofthatmostnobletrick……Eustacia，didn’tanytenderthoughtofyourownmotherleadyoutothinkofbeinggentletomineatsuchatimeofweariness？Didnotonegrainofpityenteryourheartassheturnedaway？Thinkwhatavastopportunitywasthenlostofbeginningaforgivingandhonestcourse。
　　Whydidnotyoukickhimout，andletherin，andsayI’llbeanhonestwifeandanoblewomanfromthishour？HadI
　　toldyoutogoandquencheternallyourlastflickeringchanceofhappinesshereyoucouldhavedonenoworse。
　　Well，she’sasleepnow；andhaveyouahundredgallants，neithertheynoryoucaninsultheranymore。"
　　"Youexaggeratefearfully，"shesaidinafaint，wearyvoice；"butIcannotenterintomydefence——itisnotworthdoing。Youarenothingtomeinfuture，andthepastsideofthestorymayaswellremainuntold。
　　Ihavelostallthroughyou，butIhavenotcomplained。
　　Yourblundersandmisfortunesmayhavebeenasorrowtoyou，buttheyhavebeenawrongtome。AllpersonsofrefinementhavebeenscaredawayfrommesinceIsankintothemireofmarriage。Isthisyourcherishing——toputmeintoahutlikethis，andkeepmelikethewifeofahind？Youdeceivedme——notbywords，butbyappearances，whicharelessseenthroughthanwords。Buttheplacewillserveaswellasanyother——assomewheretopassfrom——intomygrave。"
　　Herwordsweresmotheredinherthroat，andherheaddroopeddown。
　　"Idon’tknowwhatyoumeanbythat。AmIthecauseofyoursin？"（Eustaciamadeatremblingmotiontowardshim。）
　　"What，youcanbegintoshedtearsandoffermeyourhand？GoodGod！canyou？No，notI。I’llnotcommitthefaultoftakingthat。"（Thehandshehadoffereddroppednervelessly，butthetearscontinuedflowing。）
　　"Well，yes，I’lltakeit，ifonlyforthesakeofmyownfoolishkissesthatwerewastedtherebeforeIknewwhatIcherished。HowbewitchedIwas！Howcouldtherebeanygoodinawomanthateverybodyspokeillof？"
　　"O，O，O！"shecried，breakingdownatlast；and，shakingwithsobswhichchokedher，shesankuponherknees。
　　"O，willyouhavedone！O，youaretoorelentless——there’salimittothecrueltyofsavages！Ihaveheldoutlong——butyoucrushmedown。Ibegformercy——Icannotbearthisanylonger——itisinhumantogofurtherwiththis！IfI
　　had——killedyour——motherwithmyownhand——Ishouldnotdeservesuchascourgingtotheboneasthis。O，O！Godhavemercyuponamiserablewoman！……Youhavebeatenmeinthisgame——Ibegyoutostayyourhandinpity！……IconfessthatI——wilfullydidnotundothedoorthefirsttimesheknocked——but——Ishouldhaveunfasteneditthesecond——
　　ifIhadnotthoughtyouhadgonetodoityourself。
　　WhenIfoundyouhadnotIopenedit，butshewasgone。
　　That’stheextentofmycrime——towardsHER。Bestnaturescommitbadfaultssometimes，don’tthey？——Ithinktheydo。
　　NowIwillleaveyou——foreverandever！"
　　"Tellall，andIWILLpityyou。WasthemaninthehousewithyouWildeve？"
　　"Icannottell，"shesaiddesperatelythroughhersobbing。
　　"Don’tinsistfurther——Icannottell。Iamgoingfromthishouse。Wecannotbothstayhere。"
　　"Youneednotgo——Iwillgo。Youcanstayhere。"
　　"No，Iwilldress，andthenIwillgo。"
　　"Where？"
　　"WhereIcamefrom，orELSEWHERE。"
　　Shehastilydressedherself，Yeobrightmoodilywalkingupanddowntheroomthewholeofthetime。
　　Atlastallherthingswereon。Herlittlehandsquiveredsoviolentlyassheheldthemtoherchintofastenherbonnetthatshecouldnottiethestrings，andafterafewmomentssherelinquishedtheattempt。
　　Seeingthishemovedforwardandsaid，"Letmetiethem。"
　　Sheassentedinsilence，andliftedherchin。Foronceatleastinherlifeshewastotallyobliviousofthecharmofherattitude。Buthewasnot，andheturnedhiseyesaside，thathemightnotbetemptedtosoftness。
　　Thestringsweretied；sheturnedfromhim。"Doyoustillprefergoingawayyourselftomyleavingyou？"
　　heinquiredagain。
　　"Ido。"
　　"Verywell——letitbe。AndwhenyouwillconfesstothemanImaypityyou。"
　　Sheflunghershawlaboutherandwentdownstairs，leavinghimstandingintheroom。
　　Eustaciahadnotlongbeengonewhentherecameaknockatthedoorofthebedroom；andYeobrightsaid，"Well？"
　　Itwastheservant；andshereplied，"SomebodyfromMrs。Wildeve’shavecalledtotell’eethatthemis’essandthebabyaregettingonwonderfulwell，andthebaby’snameistobeEustaciaClementine。"Andthegirlretired。
　　"Whatamockery！"saidClym。"Thisunhappymarriageofminetobeperpetuatedinthatchild’sname！"
　　4—TheMinistrationsofaHalf—forgottenOneEustacia’sjourneywasatfirstasvagueindirectionasthatofthistledownonthewind。Shedidnotknowwhattodo。
　　Shewishedithadbeennightinsteadofmorning，thatshemightatleasthavebornehermiserywithoutthepossibilityofbeingseen。Tracingmileaftermilealongbetweenthedyingfernsandthewetwhitespiders’webs，sheatlengthturnedherstepstowardshergrandfather’shouse。
　　Shefoundthefrontdoorclosedandlocked。Mechanicallyshewentroundtotheendwherethestablewas，andonlookinginatthestabledoorshesawCharleystandingwithin。
　　"CaptainVyeisnotathome？"shesaid。
　　"No，ma’am，"saidtheladinaflutteroffeeling；
　　"he’sgonetoWeatherbury，andwon’tbehometillnight。
　　Andtheservantisgonehomeforaholiday。Sothehouseislockedup。"
　　Eustacia’sfacewasnotvisibletoCharleyasshestoodatthedoorway，herbackbeingtothesky，andthestablebutindifferentlylighted；butthewildnessofhermannerarrestedhisattention。Sheturnedandwalkedawayacrosstheenclosuretothegate，andwashiddenbythebank。
　　WhenshehaddisappearedCharley，withmisgivinginhiseyes，slowlycamefromthestabledoor，andgoingtoanotherpointinthebankhelookedover。
　　Eustaciawasleaningagainstitontheoutside，herfacecoveredwithherhands，andherheadpressingthedewyheatherwhichbeardedthebank’souterside。
　　Sheappearedtobeutterlyindifferenttothecircumstancethatherbonnet，hair，andgarmentswerebecomingwetanddisarrangedbythemoistureofhercold，harshpillow。
　　Clearlysomethingwaswrong。
　　CharleyhadalwaysregardedEustaciaasEustaciahadregardedClymwhenshefirstbeheldhim——asaromanticandsweetvision，scarcelyincarnate。Hehadbeensoshutofffromherbythedignityofherlookandtheprideofherspeech，exceptatthatoneblissfulintervalwhenhewasallowedtoholdherhand，thathehadhardlydeemedherawoman，winglessandearthly，subjecttohouseholdconditionsanddomesticjars。
　　Theinnerdetailsofherlifehehadonlyconjectured。
　　Shehadbeenalovelywonder，predestinedtoanorbitinwhichthewholeofhisownwasbutapoint；andthissightofherleaninglikeahelpless，despairingcreatureagainstawildwetbankfilledhimwithanamazedhorror。
　　Hecouldnolongerremainwherehewas。Leapingover，hecameup，touchedherwithhisfinger，andsaidtenderly，"Youarepoorly，ma’am。WhatcanIdo？"
　　Eustaciastartedup，andsaid，"Ah，Charley——youhavefollowedme。YoudidnotthinkwhenIlefthomeinthesummerthatIshouldcomebacklikethis！"
　　"Ididnot，dearma’am。CanIhelpyounow？"
　　"Iamafraidnot。IwishIcouldgetintothehouse。
　　Ifeelgiddy——that’sall。"
　　"Leanonmyarm，ma’am，tillwegettotheporch，andI
　　willtrytoopenthedoor。"
　　Hesupportedhertotheporch，andtheredepositingheronaseathastenedtotheback，climbedtoawindowbythehelpofaladder，anddescendinginsideopenedthedoor。
　　Nextheassistedherintotheroom，wheretherewasanold—fashionedhorsehairsetteeaslargeasadonkeywagon。
　　Shelaydownhere，andCharleycoveredherwithacloakhefoundinthehall。
　　"ShallIgetyousomethingtoeatanddrink？"hesaid。
　　"Ifyouplease，Charley。ButIsupposethereisnofire？"
　　"Icanlightit，ma’am。"
　　Hevanished，andsheheardasplittingofwoodandablowingofbellows；andpresentlyhereturned，saying，"Ihavelightedafireinthekitchen，andnowI’lllightonehere。"
　　Helitthefire，Eustaciadreamilyobservinghimfromhercouch。Whenitwasblazinguphesaid，"ShallIwheelyouroundinfrontofit，ma’am，asthemorningischilly？"
　　"Yes，ifyoulike。"
　　"ShallIgoandbringthevictualsnow？"
　　"Yes，do，"shemurmuredlanguidly。
　　Whenhehadgone，andthedullsoundsoccasionallyreachedherearsofhismovementsinthekitchen，sheforgotwhereshewas，andhadforamomenttoconsiderbyaneffortwhatthesoundsmeant。Afteranintervalwhichseemedshorttoherwhosethoughtswereelsewhere，hecameinwithatrayonwhichsteamedteaandtoast，thoughitwasnearlylunch—time。
　　"Placeitonthetable，"shesaid。"Ishallbereadysoon。"
　　Hedidso，andretiredtothedoor；when，however，heperceivedthatshedidnotmovehecamebackafewsteps。
　　"Letmeholdittoyou，ifyoudon’twishtogetup，"
　　saidCharley。Hebroughtthetraytothefrontofthecouch，wherehekneltdown，adding，"Iwillholditforyou。"
　　Eustaciasatupandpouredoutacupoftea。"Youareverykindtome，Charley，"shemurmuredasshesipped。
　　"Well，Ioughttobe，"saidhediffidently，takinggreattroublenottoresthiseyesuponher，thoughthiswastheironlynaturalposition，Eustaciabeingimmediatelybeforehim。"Youhavebeenkindtome。"
　　"HowhaveI？"saidEustacia。
　　"Youletmeholdyourhandwhenyouwereamaidenathome。"
　　"Ah，soIdid。WhydidIdothat？Mymindislost——ithadtodowiththemumming，haditnot？"
　　"Yes，youwantedtogoinmyplace。"
　　"Iremember。Idoindeedremember——toowell！"
　　Sheagainbecameutterlydowncast；andCharley，seeingthatshewasnotgoingtoeatordrinkanymore，tookawaythetray。
　　Afterwardsheoccasionallycameintoseeifthefirewasburning，toaskherifshewantedanything，totellherthatthewindhadshiftedfromsouthtowest，toaskherifshewouldlikehimtogatherhersomeblackberries；
　　toallwhichinquiriessherepliedinthenegativeorwithindifference。
　　Sheremainedonthesetteesometimelonger，whenshearousedherselfandwentupstairs。Theroominwhichshehadformerlysleptstillremainedmuchasshehadleftit，andtherecollectionthatthisforceduponherofherowngreatlychangedandinfinitelyworsenedsituationagainsetonherfacetheundeterminedandformlessmiserywhichithadwornonherfirstarrival。
　　Shepeepedintohergrandfather’sroom，throughwhichthefreshautumnairwasblowingfromtheopenwindow。
　　Hereyewasarrestedbywhatwasafamiliarsightenough，thoughitbrokeuponhernowwithanewsignificance。
　　Itwasabraceofpistols，hangingneartheheadofhergrandfather’sbed，whichhealwayskeptthereloaded，asaprecautionagainstpossibleburglars，thehousebeingverylonely。Eustaciaregardedthemlong，asiftheywerethepageofabookinwhichshereadanewandastrangematter。Quickly，likeoneafraidofherself，shereturneddownstairsandstoodindeepthought。
　　"IfIcouldonlydoit！"shesaid。"Itwouldbedoingmuchgoodtomyselfandallconnectedwithme，andnoharmtoasingleone。"
　　Theideaseemedtogatherforcewithinher，andsheremainedinafixedattitudenearlytenminutes，whenacertainfinalitywasexpressedinhergaze，andnolongertheblanknessofindecision。
　　Sheturnedandwentupthesecondtime——softlyandstealthilynow——andenteredhergrandfather’sroom，hereyesatonceseekingtheheadofthebed。Thepistolsweregone。
　　Theinstantquashingofherpurposebytheirabsenceaffectedherbrainasasuddenvacuumaffectsthebody——shenearlyfainted。Whohaddonethis？Therewasonlyonepersononthepremisesbesidesherself。
　　Eustaciainvoluntarilyturnedtotheopenwindowwhichoverlookedthegardenasfarasthebankthatboundedit。OnthesummitofthelatterstoodCharley，sufficientlyelevatedbyitsheighttoseeintotheroom。
　　Hisgazewasdirectedeagerlyandsolicitouslyuponher。
　　Shewentdownstairstothedoorandbeckonedtohim。
　　"Youhavetakenthemaway？"
　　"Yes，ma’am。"
　　"Whydidyoudoit？"
　　"Isawyoulookingatthemtoolong。"
　　"Whathasthattodowithit？"
　　"Youhavebeenheart—brokenallthemorning，asifyoudidnotwanttolive。"
　　"Well？"
　　"AndIcouldnotbeartoleavetheminyourway。
　　Therewasmeaninginyourlookatthem。"
　　"Wherearetheynow？"
　　"Lockedup。"
　　"Where？"
　　"Inthestable。"
　　"Givethemtome。"
　　"No，ma’am。"
　　"Yourefuse？"
　　"Ido。Icaretoomuchforyoutogive’emup。"
　　Sheturnedaside，herfaceforthefirsttimesofteningfromthestonyimmobilityoftheearlierday，andthecornersofhermouthresumingsomethingofthatdelicacyofcutwhichwasalwayslostinhermomentsofdespair。
　　Atlastsheconfrontedhimagain。
　　"WhyshouldInotdieifIwish？"shesaidtremulously。
　　"Ihavemadeabadbargainwithlife，andIamwearyofit——weary。Andnowyouhavehinderedmyescape。
　　O，whydidyou，Charley！Whatmakesdeathpainfulexceptthethoughtofothers’grief？——andthatisabsentinmycase，fornotasighwouldfollowme！"
　　"Ah，itistroublethathasdonethis！Iwishinmyverysoulthathewhobroughtitaboutmightdieandrot，evenif’tistransportationtosayit！"
　　"Charley，nomoreofthat。Whatdoyoumeantodoaboutthisyouhaveseen？"
　　"Keepitcloseasnight，ifyoupromisenottothinkofitagain。"
　　"Youneednotfear。Themomenthaspassed。Ipromise。"
　　Shethenwentaway，enteredthehouse，andlaydown。
　　Laterintheafternoonhergrandfatherreturned。
　　Hewasabouttoquestionhercategorically，butonlookingatherhewithheldhiswords。
　　"Yes，itistoobadtotalkof，"sheslowlyreturnedinanswertohisglance。"Canmyoldroombegotreadyformetonight，Grandfather？Ishallwanttooccupyitagain。"
　　Hedidnotaskwhatitallmeant，orwhyshehadleftherhusband，butorderedtheroomtobeprepared。
　　5—AnOldMoveInadvertentlyRepeatedCharley’sattentionstohisformermistresswereunbounded。
　　Theonlysolacetohisowntroublelayinhisattemptstorelievehers。Hourafterhourheconsideredherwants；
　　hethoughtofherpresencetherewithasortofgratitude，and，whileutteringimprecationsonthecauseofherunhappiness，insomemeasureblessedtheresult。
　　Perhapsshewouldalwaysremainthere，hethought，andthenhewouldbeashappyashehadbeenbefore。HisdreadwaslestsheshouldthinkfittoreturntoAlderworth，andinthatdreadhiseyes，withalltheinquisitivenessofaffection，frequentlysoughtherfacewhenshewasnotobservinghim，ashewouldhavewatchedtheheadofastockdovetolearnifitcontemplatedflight。
　　Havingoncereallysuccouredher，andpossiblypreservedherfromtherashestofacts，hementallyassumedinadditionaguardian’sresponsibilityforherwelfare。
　　Forthisreasonhebusilyendeavouredtoprovideherwithpleasantdistractions，bringinghomecuriousobjectswhichhefoundintheheath，suchaswhitetrumpet—shapedmosses，redheadedlichens，stonearrowheadsusedbytheoldtribesonEgdon，andfacetedcrystalsfromthehollowsofflints。
　　Thesehedepositedonthepremisesinsuchpositionsthatsheshouldseethemasifbyaccident。
　　Aweekpassed，Eustacianevergoingoutofthehouse。
　　Thenshewalkedintotheenclosedplotandlookedthroughhergrandfather’sspyglass，asshehadbeeninthehabitofdoingbeforehermarriage。Onedayshesaw，ataplacewherethehighroadcrossedthedistantvalley，aheavilyladenwagonpassingalong。Itwaspiledwithhouseholdfurniture。Shelookedagainandagain，andrecognizedittobeherown。IntheeveninghergrandfathercameindoorswitharumourthatYeobrighthadremovedthatdayfromAlderworthtotheoldhouseatBlooms—End。