Iheldhimdesperately，recklessly。Hiseyes，putmebesidemyself；hiswordsfilledmewithafrenzyofdespair。
"Gowhereyoumay，"Isaid，"Igowithyou！
Friends——reputation——IcarenothingwhoIlose，orwhatIlose！
Oh，Eustace，Iamonlyawoman——don’tmaddenme！Ican’tlivewithoutyou。Imustandwillbeyourwife！"
ThosewildwordswereallIcouldsaybeforethemiseryandmadnessinmeforcedtheirwayoutwardinaburstofsobsandtears。
Heyielded。Hesoothedmewithhischarmingvoice；hebroughtmebacktomyselfwithhistendercaresses。Hecalledthebrightheavenaboveustowitnessthathedevotedhiswholelifetome。
Hevowed——oh，insuchsolemn，sucheloquentwords！——thathisonethought，nightandday，shouldbetoprovehimselfworthyofsuchloveasmine。Andhadhenotnoblyredeemedthepledge？Hadnotthebetrothalofthatmemorablenightbeenfollowedbythebetrothalatthealtar，bythevowsbeforeGod！Ah，whatalifewasbeforeme！Whatmorethanmortalhappinesswasmine！
AgainIliftedmyheadfromhisbosomtotastethedeardelightofseeinghimbymyside——mylife，mylove，myhusband，myown！
Hardlyawakenedyetfromtheabsorbingmemoriesofthepasttothesweetrealitiesofthepresent，Iletmycheektouchhischeek，Iwhisperedtohimsoftly，"Oh，howIloveyou！howIloveyou！"
ThenextinstantIstartedbackfromhim。Myheartstoodstill。I
putmyhanduptomyface。WhatdidIfeelonmycheek？（_I_hadnotbeenweeping——Iwastoohappy。）WhatdidIfeelonmycheek？
Atear！
Hisfacewasstillavertedfromme。Iturnedittowardme，withmyownhands，bymainforce。
Ilookedathim——andsawmyhusband，onourwedding—day，withhiseyesfulloftears。
CHAPTERIII。
RAMSGATESANDS。
EUSTACEsucceededinquietingmyalarm。ButIcanhardlysaythathesucceededinsatisfyingmymindaswell。
Hehadbeenthinking，hetoldme，ofthecontrastbetweenhispastandhispresentlife。Bitterremembranceoftheyearsthathadgonehadriseninhismemory，andhadfilledhimwithmelancholymisgivingsofhiscapacitytomakemylifewithhimahappyone。Hehadaskedhimselfifhehadnotmetmetoolate——ifhewerenotalreadyamansouredandbrokenbythedisappointmentsanddisenchantmentsofthepast？Doubtssuchasthese，weighingmoreandmoreheavilyonhismind，hadfilledhiseyeswiththetearswhichIhaddiscovered——tearswhichhenowentreatedme，bymyloveforhim，todismissfrommymemoryforever。
Iforgavehim，comfortedhim，revivedhim；butthereweremomentswhentheremembranceofwhatIhadseentroubledmeinsecret，andwhenIaskedmyselfifIreallypossessedmyhusband’sfullconfidenceashepossessedmine。
WeleftthetrainatRamsgate。
Thefavoritewatering—placewasempty；theseasonwasjustover。
OurarrangementsfortheweddingtourincludedacruisetotheMediterraneaninayachtlenttoEustacebyafriend。Wewerebothfondofthesea，andwewereequallydesirous，consideringthecircumstancesunderwhichwehadmarried，ofescapingthenoticeoffriendsandacquaintances。Withthisobjectinview，havingcelebratedourmarriageprivatelyinLondon，wehaddecidedoninstructingthesailing—masteroftheyachttojoinusatRamsgate。Atthisport（whentheseasonforvisitorswasatanend）wecouldembarkfarmoreprivatelythanatthepopularyachtingstationssituatedintheIsleofWight。
Threedayspassed——daysofdelicioussolitude，ofexquisitehappiness，nevertobeforgotten，nevertobelivedoveragain，totheendofourlives！
Earlyonthemorningofthefourthday，justbeforesunrise，atriflingincidenthappened，whichwasnoticeable，nevertheless，asbeingstrangetomeinmyexperienceofmyself。
Iawoke，suddenlyandunaccountably，fromadeepanddreamlesssleepwithanall—pervadingsensationofnervousuneasinesswhichIhadneverfeltbefore。IntheolddaysattheVicaragemycapacityasasoundsleeperhadbeenthesubjectofmanyalittleharmlessjoke。FromthemomentwhenmyheadwasonthepillowI
hadneverknownwhatitwastoawakeuntilthemaidknockedatmydoor。AtallseasonsandtimesthelonganduninterruptedreposeofachildwasthereposethatIenjoyed。
AndnowIhadawakened，withoutanyassignablecause，hoursbeforemyusualtime。Itriedtocomposemyselftosleepagain。
Theeffortwasuseless。SucharestlessnesspossessedmethatI
wasnotevenabletoliestillinthebed。Myhusbandwassleepingsoundlybymyside。InthefearofdisturbinghimI
rose，andputonmydressing—gownandslippers。
Iwenttothewindow。Thesunwasjustrisingoverthecalmgraysea。Forawhilethemajesticspectaclebeforemeexercisedatranquilizinginfluenceontheirritableconditionofmynerves。
Buterelongtheoldrestlessnessreturneduponme。Iwalkedslowlytoandfrointheroom，untilIwaswearyofthemonotonyoftheexercise。Itookupabook，andlaiditasideagain。Myattentionwandered；theauthorwaspowerlesstorecallit。Igotonmyfeetoncemore，andlookedatEustace，andadmiredhimandlovedhiminhistranquilsleep。Iwentbacktothewindow，andweariedofthebeautifulmorning。Isatdownbeforetheglassandlookedatmyself。HowhaggardandwornIwasalready，throughawakingbeforemyusualtime！Iroseagain，notknowingwhattodonext。Theconfinementtothefourwallsoftheroombegantobeintolerabletome。Iopenedthedoorthatledintomyhusband’sdressing—room，andenteredit，totryifthechangewouldrelieveme。
ThefirstobjectthatInoticedwashisdressing—case，openonthetoilet—table。
Itookoutthebottlesandpotsandbrushesandcombs，theknivesandscissorsinonecompartment，thewritingmaterialsinanother。Ismelledtheperfumesandpomatums；IbusilycleanedanddustedthebottleswithmyhandkerchiefasItookthemout。
LittlebylittleIcompletelyemptiedthedressing—case。Itwaslinedwithbluevelvet。InonecornerInoticedatinyslipofloosebluesilk。Takingitbetweenmyfingerandthumb，anddrawingitupward，Idiscoveredthattherewasafalsebottomtothecase，formingasecretcompartmentforlettersandpapers。Inmystrangecondition——capricious，idle，inquisitive——itwasanamusementtometotakeoutthepapers，justasIhadtakenouteverythingelse。
Ifoundsomereceiptedbills，whichfailedtointerestme；someletters，whichitisneedlesstosayIlaidasideafteronlylookingattheaddresses；and，underall，aphotograph，facedownward，withwritingonthebackofit。Ilookedatthewriting，andsawthesewords：
"Tomydearson，Eustace。"
Hismother！thewomanwhohadsoobstinatelyandmercilesslyopposedherselftoourmarriage！
Ieagerlyturnedthephotograph，expectingtoseeawomanwithastern，ill—tempered，forbiddingcountenance。Tomysurprise，thefaceshowedtheremainsofgreatbeauty；theexpression，thoughremarkablyfirm，wasyetwinning，tender，andkind。Thegrayhairwasarrangedinrowsoflittlequaintold—fashionedcurlsoneithersideofthehead，underaplainlacecap。Atonecornerofthemouththerewasamark，apparentlyamole，whichaddedtothecharacteristicpeculiarityoftheface。Ilookedandlooked，fixingtheportraitthoroughlyinmymind。Thiswoman，whohadalmostinsultedmeandmyrelatives，was，beyondalldoubtordispute，sofarasappearanceswent，apersonpossessingunusualattractions——apersonwhomitwouldbeapleasureandaprivilegetoknow。
Ifellintodeepthought。Thediscoveryofthephotographquietedmeasnothinghadquietedmeyet。
Thestrikingofaclockdownstairsinthehallwarnedmeoftheflightoftime。Icarefullyputbackalltheobjectsinthedressing—case（beginningwiththephotograph）exactlyasIhadfoundthem，andreturnedtothebedroom。AsIlookedatmyhusband，stillsleepingpeacefully，thequestionforceditselfintomymind，Whathadmadethatgenial，gentlemotherofhissosternlybentonpartingus？soharshlyandpitilesslyresoluteinassertingherdisapprovalofourmarriage？
CouldIputmyquestionopenlytoEustacewhenheawoke？No；I
wasafraidtoventurethatlength。Ithadbeentacitlyunderstoodbetweenusthatwewerenottospeakofhismother——and，besides，hemightbeangryifheknewthatIhadopenedtheprivatecompartmentofhisdressing—case。
Afterbreakfastthatmorningwehadnewsatlastoftheyacht。
Thevesselwassafelymooredintheinnerharbor，andthesailing—masterwaswaitingtoreceivemyhusband’sordersonboard。
Eustacehesitatedataskingmetoaccompanyhimtotheyacht。Itwouldbenecessaryforhimtoexaminetheinventoryofthevessel，andtodecidequestions，notveryinterestingtoawoman，relatingtochartsandbarometers，provisionsandwater。HeaskedmeifIwouldwaitforhisreturn。Thedaywasenticinglybeautiful，andthetidewasontheebb。Ipleadedforawalkonthesands；andthelandladyatourlodgings，whohappenedtobeintheroomatthetime，volunteeredtoaccompanymeandtakecareofme。ItwasagreedthatweshouldwalkasfaraswefeltinclinedinthedirectionofBroadstairs，andthatEustaceshouldfollowandmeetusonthesands，afterhavingcompletedhisarrangementsonboardtheyacht。
InhalfanhourmorethelandladyandIwereoutonthebeach。
Thesceneonthatfineautumnmorningwasnothinglessthanenchanting。Thebriskbreeze，thebrilliantsky，theflashingbluesea，thesun—brightcliffsandthetawnysandsattheirfeet，theglidingprocessionofshipsonthegreatmarinehighwayoftheEnglishChannel——itwasallsoexhilarating，itwasallsodelightful，thatIreallybelieveifIhadbeenbymyselfIcouldhavedancedforjoylikeachild。Theonedrawbacktomyhappinesswasthelandlady’suntiringtongue。Shewasaforward，good—natured，empty—headedwoman，whopersistedintalking，whetherIlistenedornot，andwhohadahabitofperpetuallyaddressingmeas"Mrs。Woodville，"whichIthoughtalittleoverfamiliarasanassertionofequalityfromapersoninherpositiontoapersoninmine。
Wehadbeenout，Ishouldthink，morethanhalfanhour，whenweovertookaladywalkingbeforeusonthebeach。
Justaswewereabouttopassthestrangershetookherhandkerchieffromherpocket，andaccidentallydrewoutwithitaletter，whichfellunnoticedbyher，onthesand。Iwasnearesttotheletter，andIpickeditupandofferedittothelady。
Theinstantsheturnedtothankme，Istoodrootedtothespot。
Therewastheoriginalofthephotographicportraitinthedressing—case！therewasmyhusband’smother，standingfacetofacewithme！Irecognizedthequaintlittlegraycurls，thegentle，genialexpression，themoleatthecornerofthemouth。
Nomistakewaspossible。Hismotherherself！
Theoldlady，naturallyenough，mistookmyconfusionforshyness。
Withperfecttactandkindnesssheenteredintoconversationwithme。InanotherminuteIwaswalkingsidebysidewiththewomanwhohadsternlyrepudiatedmeasamemberofherfamily；feeling，Iown，terriblydiscomposed，andnotknowingintheleastwhetherIoughtoroughtnottoassumetheresponsibility，inmyhusband’sabsence，oftellingherwhoIwas。
Inanotherminutemyfamiliarlandlady，walkingontheothersideofmymother—in—law，decidedthequestionforme。IhappenedtosaythatIsupposedwemustbythattimebeneartheendofourwalk——thelittlewatering—placecalledBroadstairs。"Ohno，Mrs。
Woodville！criedtheirrepressiblewoman，callingmebymyname，asusual；"nothinglikesonearasyouthink！"
Ilookedwithabeatingheartattheoldlady。
Tomyunutterableamazement，notthefaintestgleamofrecognitionappearedinherface。OldMrs。WoodvillewentontalkingtoyoungMrs。Woodvillejustascomposedlyasifshehadneverheardherownnamebeforeinherlife！
MyfaceandmannermusthavebetrayedsomethingoftheagitationthatIwassuffering。Happeningtolookatmeattheendofhernextsentence，theoldladystarted，andsaid，inherkindlyway，"Iamafraidyouhaveoverexertedyourself。Youareverypale——youarelookingquiteexhausted。Comeandsitdownhere；
letmelendyoumysmelling—bottle。"
Ifollowedher，quitehelplessly，tothebaseofthecliff。Somefallenfragmentsofchalkofferedusaseat。Ivaguelyheardthevolublelandlady’sexpressionsofsympathyandregret；I
mechanicallytookthesmelling—bottlewhichmyhusband’smotherofferedtome，afterhearingmyname，asanactofkindnesstoastrangerIfIhadonlyhadmyselftothinkof，IbelieveIshouldhaveprovokedanexplanationonthespot。ButIhadEustacetothinkof。Iwasentirelyignorantoftherelations，hostileorfriendly，whichexistedbetweenhismotherandhimself。WhatcouldIdo？
Inthemeantimetheoldladywasstillspeakingtomewiththemostconsideratesympathy。Shetoowasfatigued。shesaid。ShehadpassedawearynightatthebedsideofanearrelativestayingatRamsgate。Onlythedaybeforeshehadreceivedatelegramannouncingthatoneofhersisterswasseriouslyill。
ShewasherselfthankGod，stillactiveandstrong，andshehadthoughtitherdutytostartatonceforRamsgate。Towardthemorningthestateofthepatienthadimproved。"Thedoctorassuresmema’am，thatthereisnoimmediatedanger；andI
thoughtitmightreviveme，aftermylongnightatthebedside，ifItookalittlewalkonthebeach。"
Iheardthewords——Iunderstoodwhattheymeant——butIwasstilltoobewilderedandtoointimidatedbymyextraordinarypositiontobeabletocontinuetheconversation。Thelandladyhadasensiblesuggestiontomake——thelandladywasthenextpersonwhospoke。
"Hereisagentlemancoming，"shesaidtome，pointinginthedirectionofRamsgate。Youcanneverwalkback。ShallweaskhimtosendachaisefromBroadstairstothegapinthecliff？"
Thegentlemanadvancedalittlenearer。
ThelandladyandIrecognizedhimatthesamemoment。ItwasEustacecomingtomeetus，aswehadarranged。Theirrepressiblelandladygavethefreestexpressiontoherfeelings。Oh，Mrs。
Woodville，ain’titlucky？hereisMr。Woodvillehimself。"
OncemoreIlookedatmymother—in—law。Oncemorethenamefailedtoproducetheslightesteffectonher。Hersightwasnotsokeenasours；shehadnotrecognizedhersonyet。Hehadyoungeyeslikeus，andherecognizedhismother。Foramomenthestoppedlikeamanthunderstruck。Thenhecameon——hisruddyfacewhitewithsuppressedemotion，hiseyesfixedonhismother。
"Youhere！"hesaidtoher。
"Howdoyoudo，Eustace？"shequietlyrejoined。"Have_you_heardofyouraunt’sillnesstoo？DidyouknowshewasstayingatRamsgate？"
Hemadenoanswer。Thelandlady，drawingtheinevitableinferencefromthewordsthatshehadjustheard，lookedfrommetomymother—in—lawinastateofamazement，whichparalyzedevenhertongue。Iwaitedwithmyeyesonmyhusband，toseewhathewoulddo。Ifhehaddelayedacknowledgingmeanothermoment，thewholefuturecourseofmylifemighthavebeenaltered——Ishouldhavedespisedhim。
Hedid_not_delay。Hecametomysideandtookmyhand。
"Doyouknowwhothisis？"besaidtohismother。
Sheanswered，lookingatmewithacourteousbendofherhead：
"AladyImetonthebeach，Eustace，whokindlyrestoredtomealetterthatIdropped。IthinkIheardthename"（sheturnedtothelandlady）：Mrs。Woodville，wasitnot？"
Myhusband’sfingersunconsciouslyclosedonmyhandwithagraspthathurtme。Hesethismotherright，itisonlyjusttosay，withoutonecowardlymomentofhesitation。
"Mother，"hesaidtoher，veryquietly，"thisladyismywife。"
Shehadhithertokeptherseat。Shenowroseslowlyandfacedhersoninsilence。Thefirstexpressionofsurprisepassedfromherface。ItwassucceededbythemostterriblelookofmingledindignationandcontemptthatIeversawinawoman’seyes。
"Ipityyourwife，"shesaid。
Withthosewordsandnomore，liftingherhandshewavedhimbackfromher，andwentonherwayagain，aswehadfirstfoundher，alone。
CHAPTERIV。
ONTHEWAYHOME。
LEFTbyourselves，therewasamomentofsilenceamongus。
Eustacespokefirst。
"Areyouabletowalkback？"hesaidtome。"OrshallwegoontoBroadstairs，andreturntoRamsgatebytherailway？"
Heputthosequestionsascomposedly，sofarashismannerwasconcerned，asifnothingremarkablehadhappened。Buthiseyesandhislipsbetrayedhim。Theytoldmethathewassufferingkeenlyinsecret。Theextraordinaryscenethathadjustpassed，farfromdeprivingmeofthelastremainsofmycourage，hadstrungupmynervesandrestoredmyself—possession。Imusthavebeenmoreorlessthanwomanifmyself—respecthadnotbeenwounded，ifmycuriosityhadnotbeenwroughttothehighestpitch，bytheextraordinaryconductofmyhusband’smotherwhenEustacepresentedmetoher。Whatwasthesecretofherdespisinghim，andpityingme？Wherewastheexplanationofherincomprehensibleapathywhenmynamewastwicepronouncedinherhearing？Whyhadsheleftus，asifthebareideaofremaininginourcompanywasabhorrenttoher？Theforemostinterestofmylifewasnowtheinterestofpenetratingthesemysteries。Walk？I
wasinsuchafeverofexpectationthatIfeltasifIcouldhavewalkedtotheworld’send，ifIcouldonlykeepmyhusbandbymyside，andquestionhimontheway。
"Iamquiterecovered，"Isaid。"Letusgoback，aswecame，onfoot。"
Eustaceglancedatthelandlady。Thelandladyunderstoodhim。
"Iwon’tintrudemycompanyonyou，sir，"shesaid，sharply。"I
havesomebusinesstodoatBroadstairs，and，nowIamsonear，I
mayaswellgoon。Good—morning，Mrs。Woodville。"
Shelaidamarkedemphasisonmyname，andsheaddedonesignificantlookatparting，which（inthepreoccupiedstateofmymindatthatmoment）Ientirelyfailedtocomprehend。Therewasneithertimenoropportunitytoaskherwhatshemeant。Withastifflittlebow，addressedtoEustace，sheleftusashismotherhadleftustakingthewaytoBroadstairs，andwalkingrapidly。
Atlastwewerealone。
Ilostnotimeinbeginningmyinquiries；Iwastednowordsinprefatoryphrases。IntheplainesttermsIputthequestiontohim：
"Whatdoesyourmother’sconductmean？"
Insteadofanswering，heburstintoafitoflaughter——loud，coarse，hardlaughter，soutterlyunlikeanysoundIhadeveryetheardissuefromhislips，sostrangelyandshockinglyforeigntohischaracteras_I_understoodit，thatIstoodstillonthesandsandopenlyremonstratedwithhim。
"Eustace！youarenotlikeyourself，"Isaid。Youalmostfrightenme。"
Hetooknonotice。Heseemedtobepursuingsomepleasanttrainofthoughtjuststartedinhismind。
"Solikemymother！"heexclaimed，withtheairofamanwhofeltirresistiblydivertedbysomehumorousideaofhisown。"Tellmeallaboutit，Valeria！"
"Tell_you_！"Irepeated。"Afterwhathashappened，surelyitisyourdutytoenlighten_me_。"
"Youdon’tseethejoke，"hesaid。
"Inotonlyfailtoseethejoke，"Irejoined，"Iseesomethinginyourmother’slanguageandyourmother’sbehaviorwhichjustifiesmeinaskingyouforaseriousexplanation。"
"MydearValeria，ifyouunderstoodmymotheraswellasIdo，aseriousexplanationofherconductwouldbethelastthingintheworldthatyouwouldexpectfromme。Theideaoftakingmymotherseriously！"Heburstoutlaughingagain。"Mydarling，youdon’tknowhowyouamuseme。"
Itwasallforced：itwasallunnatural。He，themostdelicate，themostrefinedofmen——agentlemaninthehighestsenseoftheword——wascoarseandloudandvulgar！Myheartsankunderasuddensenseofmisgivingwhich，withallmyloveforhim，itwasimpossibletoresist。InunutterabledistressandalarmIaskedmyself，"Ismyhusbandbeginningtodeceiveme？isheactingapart，andactingitbadly，beforewehavebeenmarriedaweek？"I
setmyselftowinhisconfidenceinanewway。Hewasevidentlydeterminedtoforcehisownpointofviewonme。Idetermined，onmyside，toaccepthispointofview。
"YoutellmeIdon’tunderstandyourmother，"Isaid，gently。
"Willyouhelpmetounderstandher？"
"Itisnoteasytohelpyoutounderstandawomanwhodoesn’tunderstandherself，"heanswered。"ButIwilltry。Thekeytomypoordearmother’scharacteris，inoneword——Eccentricity。"
IfhehadpickedoutthemostinappropriatewordinthewholedictionarytodescribetheladywhomIhadmetonthebeach，"Eccentricity"wouldhavebeenthatword。AchildwhohadseenwhatIsaw，whohadheardwhatIheardwouldhavediscoveredthathewastrifling——grossly，recklesslytrifling——withthetruth"BearinmindwhatIhavesaid，"heproceeded；"andifyouwanttounderstandmymother，dowhatIaskedyoutodoaminutesince——tellmeallaboutit。Howcameyoutospeaktoher，tobeginwith？"
"Yourmothertoldyou，Eustace。Iwaswalkingjustbehindher，whenshedroppedaletterbyaccident——"
"Noaccident，"heinterposed。"Theletterwasdroppedonpurpose。"
"Impossible！"Iexclaimed。"Whyshouldyourmotherdroptheletteronpurpose？"
"Usethekeytohercharacter，mydear。Eccentricity！Mymother’soddwayofmakingacquaintancewithyou。"
"Makingacquaintancewithme？IhavejusttoldyouthatIwaswalkingbehindher。ShecouldnothaveknownoftheexistenceofsuchapersonasmyselfuntilIspoketoherfirst。"
"Soyousuppose，Valeria。"
"Iamcertainofit。"
"Pardonme——youdon’tknowmymotherasIdo。"
Ibegantoloseallpatiencewithhim。
"Doyoumeantotellme，"Isaid，"thatyourmotherwasoutonthesandsto—dayfortheexpresspurposeofmakingacquaintancewithMe？"
"Ihavenottheslightestdoubtofit，"heanswered，coolly。
"Why，shedidn’tevenrecognizemyname！"Iburstout。"TwiceoverthelandladycalledmeMrs。Woodvilleinyourmother’shearing，andtwiceover，Ideclaretoyouonmywordofhonor，itfailedtoproducetheslightestimpressiononher。Shelookedandactedasifshehadneverheardherownnamebeforeinherlife。"
"’Acted’istherightword，"hesaid，justascomposedlyasbefore。"Thewomenonthestagearenottheonlywomenwhocanact。Mymother’sobjectwastomakeherselfthoroughlyacquaintedwithyou，andtothrowyouoffyourguardbyspeakinginthecharacterofastranger。Itisexactlylikehertotakethatroundaboutwayofsatisfyinghercuriosityaboutadaughter—in—lawshedisapprovesof。IfIhadnotjoinedyouwhenIdid，youwouldhavebeenexaminedandcross—examinedaboutyourselfandaboutme，andyouwouldinnocentlyhaveansweredundertheimpressionthatyouwerespeakingtoachanceacquaintance。Thereismymotherallover！Sheisyourenemy，remember——notyourfriend。Sheisnotinsearchofyourmerits，butofyourfaults。Andyouwonderwhynoimpressionwasproducedonherwhensheheardyouaddressedbyyourname！Poorinnocent！
Icantellyouthis——youonlydiscoveredmymotherinherowncharacterwhenIputanendtothemystificationbypresentingyoutoeachother。Yousawhowangryshewas，andnowyouknowwhy。"
Ilethimgoonwithoutsayingaword。Ilistened——oh！withsuchaheavyheart，withsuchacrushingsenseofdisenchantmentanddespair！Theidolofmyworship，thecompanion，guide，protectorofmylife——hadhefallensolow？couldhestooptosuchshamelessprevaricationasthis？
Wasthereonewordoftruthinallthathehadsaidtome？Yes！
IfIhadnotdiscoveredhismother’sportrait，itwascertainlytruethatIshouldnothaveknown，notevenhavevaguelysuspected，whoshereallywas。Apartfromthis，therestwaslying，clumsylying，whichsaidonethingatleastforhim，thathewasnotaccustomedtofalsehoodanddeceit。GoodHeavens！ifmyhusbandwastobebelieved，hismothermusthavetrackedustoLondon，trackedustothechurch，trackedustotherailwaystation，trackedustoRamsgate！ToassertthatsheknewmebysightasthewifeofEustace，andthatshehadwaitedonthesandsanddroppedherletterfortheexpresspurposeofmakingacquaintancewithme，wasalsotoasserteveryoneofthesemonstrousprobabilitiestobefactsthathadactuallyhappened！
Icouldsaynomore。Iwalkedbyhissideinsilence，feelingthemiserableconvictionthattherewasanabyssintheshapeofafamilysecretbetweenmyhusbandandme。Inthespirit，ifnotinthebody，wewereseparated，afteramarriedlifeofbarelyfourdays。
"Valeria，"heasked，"haveyounothingtosaytome？"
"Nothing。"
"Areyounotsatisfiedwithmyexplanation？"
Idetectedaslighttremorinhisvoiceasheputthatquestion。
Thetonewas，forthefirsttimesincewehadspokentogether，atonethatmyexperienceassociatedwithhimincertainmoodsofhiswhichIhadalreadylearnedtoknowwell。Amongthehundredthousandmysteriousinfluenceswhichamanexercisesoverawomanwholoveshim，Idoubtifthereisanymoreirresistibletoherthantheinfluenceofhisvoice。Iamnotoneofthosewomenwhoshedtearsonthesmallestprovocation：itisnotinmytemperament，Isuppose。ButwhenIheardthatlittlenaturalchangeinhistonemymindwentback（Ican’tsaywhy）tothehappydaywhenIfirstownedthatIlovedhim。Iburstoutcrying。
Hesuddenlystoodstill，andtookmebythehand。Hetriedtolookatme。
Ikeptmyheaddownandmyeyesontheground。Iwasashamedofmyweaknessandmywantofspirit。Iwasdeterminednottolookathim。
Inthesilencethatfollowedhesuddenlydroppedonhiskneesatmyfeet，withacryofdespairthatcutthroughmelikeaknife。
"Valeria！Iamvile——Iamfalse——Iamunworthyofyou。Don’tbelieveawordofwhatIhavebeensaying——lies，lies，cowardly，contemptiblelies！Youdon’tknowwhatIhavegonethrough；youdon’tknowhowIhavebeentortured。Oh，mydarling，trynottodespiseme！ImusthavebeenbesidemyselfwhenIspoketoyouasIdid。Youlookedhurt；youlookedoffended；Ididn’tknowwhattodo。Iwantedtospareyouevenamoment’spain——Iwantedtohushitup，andhavedonewithit。ForGod’ssakedon’taskmetotellyouanymore！Mylove！myangel！it’ssomethingbetweenmymotherandme；it’snothingthatneeddisturbyou；it’snothingtoanybodynow。Iloveyou，Iadoreyou；mywholeheartandsoulareyours。Besatisfiedwiththat。Forgetwhathashappened。Youshallneverseemymotheragain。Wewillleavethisplaceto—morrow。Wewillgoawayintheyacht。Doesitmatterwherewelive，solongasweliveforeachother？Forgiveandforget！Oh，Valeria，Valeria，forgiveandforget！"
Unutterablemiserywasinhisface；unutterablemiserywasinhisvoice。Rememberthis。AndrememberthatIlovedhim。
"Itiseasytoforgive，"Isaid，sadly。"Foryoursake，Eustace，Iwilltrytoforget。"
IraisedhimgentlyasIspoke。Hekissedmyhandswiththeairofamanwhowastoohumbletoventureonanymorefamiliarexpressionofhisgratitudethanthat。ThesenseofembarrassmentbetweenusasweslowlywalkedonagainwassounendurablethatI
actuallycastaboutinmymindforasubjectofconversation，asifIhadbeeninthecompanyofastranger！Inmercyto_him_，I
askedhimtotellmeabouttheyacht。
Heseizedonthesubjectasadrowningmanseizesonthehandthatrescueshim。
Onthatonepoorlittletopicoftheyachthetalked，talked，talked，asifhislifedependeduponhisnotbeingsilentforaninstantontherestofthewayback。Tomeitwasdreadfultohearhim。Icouldestimatewhathewassufferingbytheviolencewhichhe——ordinarilyasilentandthoughtfulman——wasnowdoingtohistruenature，andtotheprejudicesandhabitsofhislife。
WiththegreatestdifficultyIpreservedmyself—controluntilwereachedthedoorofourlodgings。ThereIwasobligedtopleadfatigue，andaskhimtoletmerestforalittlewhileinthesolitudeofmyownroom。
"Shallwesailto—morrow？"hecalledaftermesuddenly，asI
ascendedthestairs。