’Thesewilldo,’hesaidatlast;’Ican’tsayIthinkmuchofyourtasteinslippers,butthefit’sthething。’Heslippedhisfeetintoapairofsock—likesambhur—skinfootcoverings,foundalongchair,andlayatlength。
’They’remyownpetpair,’Torpenhowsaid。’Iwasjustgoingtoputthemonmyself。’
’Allyourreprehensibleselfishness。Justbecauseyouseemehappyforaminute,youwanttoworrymeandstirmeup。Findanotherpair。’
’GoodforyouthatDickcan’twearyourclothes,Torp。Youtwolivecommunistically,’saidtheNilghai。
’DickneverhasanythingthatIcanwear。He’sonlyusefultospongeupon。’
’Confoundyou,haveyoubeenrummagingroundamongmyclothes,then?’saidDick。’Iputasovereigninthetobacco—jaryesterday。Howdoyouexpectamantokeephisaccountsproperlyifyou————’
HeretheNilghaibegantolaugh,andTorpenhowjoinedhim。
’Hidasovereignyesterday!You’renosortoffinancier。Youlentmeafiveraboutamonthback。Doyouremember?’Torpenhowsaid。
’Yes,ofcourse。’
’DoyourememberthatIpaidityoutendayslater,andyouputitatthebottomofthetobacco?’
’ByJove,didI?Ithoughtitwasinoneofmycolour—boxes。’
’Youthought!AboutaweekagoIwentintoyourstudiotogetsome’baccyandfoundit。’
’Whatdidyoudowithit?’
’TooktheNilghaitoatheatreandfedhim。’
’Youcouldn’tfeedtheNilghaiundertwicethemoney——notthoughyougavehimArmybeef。Well,IsupposeIshouldhavefounditoutsoonerorlater。Whatistheretolaughat?’
’You’reamostamazingcuckooinmanydirections,’saidtheNilghai,stillchucklingoverthethoughtofthedinner。’Nevermind。Wehadbothbeenworkingveryhard,anditwasyourunearnedincrementwespent,andasyou’reonlyaloaferitdidn’tmatter。’
’That’spleasant——fromthemanwhoisburstingwithmymeat,too。I’llgetthatdinnerbackoneofthesedays。Supposewegotoatheatrenow。’
’Putourbootson,——anddress,——andwash?’TheNilghaispokeverylazily。
’Iwithdrawthemotion。’
’Suppose,justforachange——asastartlingvariety,youknow——we,thatistosaywe,getourcharcoalandourcanvasandgoonwithourwork。’
Torpenhowspokepointedly,butDickonlywriggledhistoesinsidethesoftleathermoccasins。
’Whataone—ideaedcluckerthatis!IfIhadanyunfinishedfiguresonhand,Ihaven’tanymodel;ifIhadmymodel,Ihaven’tanyspray,andI
neverleavecharcoalunfixedovernight;andifIhadmysprayandtwentyphotographsofbackgrounds,Icouldn’tdoanythingto—night。I
don’tfeelthatway。’
’Binkie—dog,he’salazyhog,isn’the?’saidtheNilghai。
’Verygood,Iwilldosomework,’saidDick,risingswiftly。’I’llfetchtheNungapungaBook,andwe’lladdanotherpicturetotheNilghaiSaga。’
’Aren’tyouworryinghimalittletoomuch?’askedtheNilghai,whenDickhadlefttheroom。
’Perhaps,butIknowwhathecanturnoutifhelikes。ItmakesmesavagetohearhimpraisedforpastworkwhenIknowwhatheoughttodo。YouandIarearrangedfor————’
’ByKismetandourownpowers,more’sthepity。Ihavedreamedofagooddeal。’
’SohaveI,butweknowourlimitationsnow。I’mdashedifIknowwhatDick’smaybewhenhegiveshimselftohiswork。That’swhatmakesmesokeenabouthim。’
’Andwhenall’ssaidanddone,youwillbeputaside——quiterightly——forafemalegirl。’
’Iwonder……Wheredoyouthinkhehasbeento—day?’
’Tothesea。Didn’tyouseethelookinhiseyeswhenhetalkedabouther?
He’sasrestlessasaswallowinautumn。’
’Yes;butdidhegoalone?’
’Idon’tknow,andIdon’tcare,buthehasthebeginningsofthego—feveruponhim。Hewantstoup—stakesandmoveout。There’snomistakingthesigns。Whateverhemayhavesaidbefore,hehasthecalluponhimnow。’
’Itmightbehissalvation,’Torpenhowsaid。
’Perhaps——ifyoucaretotaketheresponsibilityofbeingasaviour。’
Dickreturnedwiththebigclaspedsketch—bookthattheNilghaiknewwellanddidnotlovetoomuch。InitDickhaddrawnallmannerofmovingincidents,experiencedbyhimselforrelatedtohimbytheothers,ofallthefourcornersoftheearth。ButthewiderrangeoftheNilghai’sbodyandlifeattractedhimmost。Whentruthfailedhefellbackonfictionofthewildest,andrepresentedincidentsintheNilghai’scareerthatwereunseemly,——hismarriageswithmanyAfricanprincesses,hisshamelessbetrayal,forArabwives,ofanarmycorpstotheMahdi,histattoomentbyskilledoperatorsinBurmah,hisinterview(andhisfears)
withtheyellowheadsmanintheblood—stainedexecution—groundofCanton,andfinally,thepassingsofhisspiritintothebodiesofwhales,elephants,andtoucans。Torpenhowfromtimetotimehadaddedrhymeddescriptions,andthewholewasacuriouspieceofart,becauseDickdecided,havingregardtothenameofthebookwhichbeinginterpretedmeans’naked,’thatitwouldbewrongtodrawtheNilghaiwithanyclotheson,underanycircumstances。Consequentlythelastsketch,representingthatmuch—enduringmancallingontheWarOfficetopresshisclaimstotheEgyptianmedal,washardlydelicate。HesettledhimselfcomfortablyonTorpenhow’stableandturnedoverthepages。
’WhatafortuneyouwouldhavebeentoBlake,Nilghai!’hesaid。’There’sasucculentpinknessaboutsomeofthesesketchesthat’smorethanlife—like。"TheNilghaisurroundedwhilebathingbytheMahdieh"——thatwasfoundedonfact,eh?’
’Itwasverynearlymylastbath,youirreverentdauber。HasBinkiecomeintotheSagayet?’
’No;theBinkie—boyhasn’tdoneanythingexcepteatandkillcats。Let’ssee。Hereyouareasastained—glasssaintinachurch。Deuceddecorativelinesaboutyouranatomy;yououghttobegratefulforbeinghandeddowntoposterityinthisway。Fiftyyearshenceyou’llexistinrareandcuriousfacsimilesattenguineaseach。WhatshallItrythistime?ThedomesticlifeoftheNilghai?’
’Hasn’tgotany。’
’TheundomesticlifeoftheNilghai,then。Ofcourse。Mass—meetingofhiswivesinTrafalgarSquare。That’sit。TheycamefromtheendsoftheearthtoattendNilghai’sweddingtoanEnglishbride。Thisshallbeanepic。It’sasweetmaterialtoworkwith。’
’It’sascandalouswasteoftime,’saidTorpenhow。
’Don’tworry;itkeepsone’shandin——speciallywhenyoubeginwithoutthepencil。’Hesettoworkrapidly。’That’sNelson’sColumn。PresentlytheNilghaiwillappearshinningupit。’
’Givehimsomeclothesthistime。’
’Certainly——aveilandanorange—wreath,becausehe’sbeenmarried。’
’Gad,that’scleverenough!’saidTorpenhowoverhisshoulder,asDickbroughtoutofthepaperwiththreetwirlsofthebrushaveryfatbackandlabouringshoulderpressedagainststone。
’Justimagine,’Dickcontinued,’ifwecouldpublishafewofthesedearlittlethingseverytimetheNilghaisubsidisesamanwhocanwrite,togivethepublicanhonestopinionofmypictures。’
’Well,you’lladmitIalwaystellyouwhenIhavedoneanythingofthatkind。IknowIcan’thammeryouasyououghttobehammered,soIgivethejobtoanother。YoungMaclagan,forinstance————’
’No—o——onehalf—minute,oldman;stickyourhandoutagainstthedarkofthewall—paper——youonlyburbleandcallmenames。Thatleftshoulder’soutofdrawing。Imustliterallythrowaveiloverthat。Where’smypen—knife?Well,whataboutMaclagan?’
’Ionlygavehimhisriding—ordersto——tolambastyouongeneralprinciplesfornotproducingworkthatwilllast。’
’Whereuponthatyoungfool,’——Dickthrewbackhisheadandshutoneeyeasheshiftedthepageunderhishand,——’beingleftalonewithanink—potandwhatheconceivedwerehisownnotions,wentandspiltthembothovermeinthepapers。Youmighthaveengagedagrownmanforthebusiness,Nilghai。Howdoyouthinkthebridalveillooksnow,Torp?’
’Howthedeucedothreedabsandtwoscratchesmakethestuffstandawayfromthebodyasitdoes?’saidTorpenhow,towhomDick’smethodswerealwaysnew。
’Itjustdependsonwhereyouput’em。IfMaclaganhadknowthatmuchabouthisbusinesshemighthavedonebetter。’
’Whydon’tyouputthedamneddabsintosomethingthatwillstay,then?’
insistedtheNilghai,whohadreallytakenconsiderabletroubleinhiringforDick’sbenefitthepenofayounggentlemanwhodevotedmostofhiswakinghourstoananxiousconsiderationoftheaimsandendsofArt,which,hewrote,wasoneandindivisible。
’WaitaminutetillIseehowIamgoingtomanagemyprocessionofwives。Youseemtohavemarriedextensively,andImustrough’eminwiththepencil——Medes,Parthians,Edomites……Now,settingasidetheweaknessandthewickednessand——andthefat—headednessofdeliberatelytryingtodoworkthatwilllive,astheycallit,I’mcontentwiththeknowledgethatI’vedonemybestuptodate,andIshan’tdoanythinglikeitagainforsomehoursatleast——probablyyears。Mostprobablynever。’
’What!anystuffyouhaveinstockyourbestwork?’saidTorpenhow。
’Anythingyou’vesold?’saidtheNilghai。
’Ohno。Itisn’thereanditisn’tsold。Betterthanthat,itcan’tbesold,andIdon’tthinkanyoneknowswhereitis。I’msureIdon’t……Andyetmoreandmorewives,onthenorthsideofthesquare。Observethevirtuoushorrorofthelions!’
’Youmayaswellexplain,’saidTorpenhow,andDickliftedhisheadfromthepaper。
’Thesearemindedmeofit,’hesaidslowly。’Iwishithadn’t。Itweighssomefewthousandtons——unlessyoucutitoutwithacoldchisel。’
’Don’tbeanidiot。Youcan’tposewithushere,’saidtheNilghai。
’There’snoposeinthematteratall。It’safact。IwasloafingfromLimatoAucklandinabig,old,condemnedpassenger—shipturnedintoacargo—boatandownedbyasecond—hadItalianfirm。Shewasacrazybasket。Wewerecutdowntofifteentonofcoaladay,andwethoughtourselvesluckywhenwekickedsevenknotsanhouroutofher。Thenweusedtostopandletthebearingscooldown,andwonderwhetherthecrackintheshaftwasspreading。’
’Wereyouastewardorastokerinthosedays?’
’Iwasflushforthetimebeing,soIwasapassenger,orelseIshouldhavebeenasteward,Ithink,’saidDick,withperfectgravity,returningtotheprocessionofangrywives。’IwastheonlyotherpassengerfromLima,andtheshipwashalfempty,andfullofratsandcockroachesandscorpions。’
’Butwhathasthistodowiththepicture?’
’Waitaminute。ShehadbeenintheChinapassengertradeandherlowerdeckshadbunksfortwothousandpigtails。Thosewerealltakendown,andshewasemptyuptohernose,andthelightscamethroughtheportholes——mostannoyinglightstoworkintillyougotusedtothem。Ihadn’tanythingtodoforweeks。Theship’schartswereinpiecesandourskipperdaren’trunsouthforfearofcatchingastorm。SohedidhisbesttoknockalltheSocietyIslandsoutofthewateronebyone,andIwentintothelowerdeck,anddidmypictureontheportsideasfarforwardinherasIcouldgo。Therewassomebrownpaintandsomegreenpaintthattheyusedfortheboats,andsomeblackpaintforironwork,andthatwasallIhad。’
’Thepassengersmusthavethoughtyoumad。’
’Therewasonlyone,anditwasawoman;butitgavemethenotionofmypicture。’
’Whatwasshelike?’saidTorpenhow。
’ShewasasortofNegroid—Jewess—Cuban;withmoralstomatch。Shecouldn’treadorwrite,andshedidn’twantto,butsheusedtocomedownandwatchmepaint,andtheskipperdidn’tlikeit,becausehewaspayingherpassageandhadtobeonthebridgeoccasionally。’
’Isee。Thatmusthavebeencheerful。’
’ItwasthebesttimeIeverhad。Tobeginwith,wedidn’tknowwhetherweshouldgouporgodownanyminutewhentherewasaseaon;andwhenitwascalmitwasparadise;andthewomanusedtomixthepaintsandtalkbrokenEnglish,andtheskipperusedtostealdowneveryfewminutestothelowerdeck,becausehesaidhewasafraidoffire。So,yousee,wecouldnevertellwhenwemightbecaught,andIhadasplendidnotiontoworkoutinonlythreekeysofcolour。’
’Whatwasthenotion?’
’TwolinesinPoe——
NeithertheanglesinHeavenabovenorthedemonsdownunderthesea,CaneverdissevermysoulfromthesoulofthebeautifulAnnabelLee。
Itcameoutofthesea——allbyitself。Idrewthatfight,foughtoutingreenwateroverthenaked,chokingsoul,andthewomanservedasthemodelforthedevilsandtheangelsboth——sea—devilsandsea—angels,andthesoulhalfdrownedbetweenthem。Itdoesn’tsoundmuch,butwhentherewasagoodlightonthelowerdeckitlookedveryfineandcreepy。Itwassevenbyfourteenfeet,alldoneinshiftinglightforshiftinglight。’
’Didthewomaninspireyoumuch?’saidTorpenhow。
’Sheandtheseabetweenthem——immensely。Therewasaheapofbaddrawinginthatpicture。IrememberIwentoutofmywaytoforeshortenforsheerdelightofdoingit,andIforeshorteneddamnably,butforallthatit’sthebestthingI’veeverdone;andnowIsupposetheship’sbrokenuporgonedown。Whew!Whatatimethatwas!’
’Whathappenedafterall?’
’Itallended。TheywereloadingherwithwoolwhenIlefttheship,buteventhestevedoreskeptthepicturecleartothelast。Theeyesofthedemonsscaredthem,Ihonestlybelieve。’
’Andthewoman?’
’Shewasscaredtoowhenitwasfinished。Sheusedtocrossherselfbeforeshewentdowntolookatit。Justthreecoloursandnochanceofgettinganymore,andtheseaoutsideandunlimitedlove—makinginside,andthefearofdeathatopofeverythingelse,OLord!’Hehadceasedtolookatthesketch,butwasstaringstraightinfrontofhimacrosstheroom。
’Whydon’tyoutrysomethingofthesamekindnow?’saidtheNilghai。
’Becausethosethingscomenotbyfastingandprayer。WhenIfindacargo—boatandaJewess—Cubanandanothernotionandthesameoldlife,Imay。’
’Youwon’tfindthemhere,’saidtheNilghai。
’No,Ishallnot。’Dickshutthesketch—bookwithabang。’Thisroom’sashotasanoven。Openthewindow,someone。’
Heleanedintothedarkness,watchingthegreaterdarknessofLondonbelowhim。Thechambersstoodmuchhigherthantheotherhouses,commandingahundredchimneys——crookedcowlsthatlookedlikesittingcatsastheyswunground,andotheruncouthbrickandzincmysteriessupportedbyironstanchionsandclampedby8—pieces。NorthwardthelightsofPiccadillyCircusandLeicesterSquarethrewacopper—colouredglareabovetheblackroofs,andsouthwardbyalltheorderlylightsoftheThames。Atrainrolledoutacrossoneoftherailwaybridges,anditsthunderdrownedforaminutethedullroarofthestreets。TheNilghailookedathiswatchandsaidshortly,’That’stheParisnight—mail。YoucanbookfromheretoSt。Petersburgifyouchoose。’
Dickcrammedheadandshouldersoutofthewindowandlookedacrosstheriver。Torpenhowcametohisside,whiletheNilghaipassedoverquietlytothepianoandopenedit。Binkie,makinghimselfaslargeaspossible,spreadoutuponthesofawiththeairofonewhoisnottobelightlydisturbed。
’Well,’saidtheNilghaitothetwopairsofshoulders,’haveyouneverseenthisplacebefore?’
Asteam—tugontheriverhootedasshetowedherbargestowharf。Thentheboomofthetrafficcameintotheroom。TorpenhownudgedDick。
’Goodplacetobankin——badplacetobunkin,Dickie,isn’tit?’
Dick’schinwasinhishandasheanswered,inthewordsofageneralnotwithoutfame,stilllookingoutonthedarkness——’"MyGod,whatacitytoloot!"’
Binkiefoundthenightairticklinghiswhiskersandsneezedplaintively。
’WeshallgivetheBinkie—dogacold,’saidTorpenhow。’Comein,’andtheywithdrewtheirheads。’You’llbeburiedinKensalGreen,Dick,oneofthesedays,ifitisn’tclosedbythetimeyouwanttogothere——buriedwithintwofeetofsomeoneelse,hiswifeandhisfamily。’
’Allahforbid!Ishallgetawaybeforethattimecomes。Giveamanroomtostretchhislegs,Mr。Binkie。’DickflunghimselfdownonthesofaandtweakedBinkie’svelvetears,yawningheavilythewhile。
’You’llfindthatwardrobe—caseverymuchoutoftune,’TorpenhowsaidtotheNilghai。’It’snevertouchedexceptbyyou。’
’Apieceofgrossextravagance,’Dickgrunted。’TheNilghaionlycomeswhenI’mout。’
’That’sbecauseyou’realwaysout。Howl,Nilghai,andlethimhear。’?
’ThelifeoftheNilghaiisfraudandslaughter,HiswritingsarewateredDickensandwater;
ButthevoiceoftheNilghairaisedonhighMakeseventheMahdiehgladtodie!’?
DickquotedfromTorpenhow’sletterpressintheNungapungaBook。
’HowdotheycallmooseinCanada,Nilghai?’
Themanlaughed。Singingwashisonepoliteaccomplishment,asmanyPress—tentsinfar—offlandshadknown。
’WhatshallIsing?’saidhe,turninginthechair。
’"MollRoeintheMorning,"’saidTorpenhow,ataventure。
’No,’saidDick,sharply,andtheNilghaiopenedhiseyes。Theoldchantywhereofhe,amongaveryfew,possessedallthewordswasnotaprettyone,butDickhadhearditmanytimesbeforewithoutwincing。Withoutpreludehelaunchedintothatstatelytunethatcallstogetherandtroublestheheartsofthegipsiesofthesea——
’Farewellandadieutoyou,Spanishladies,Farewellandadieutoyou,ladiesofSpain。’?
Dickturneduneasilyonthesofa,forhecouldhearthebowsoftheBarralongcrashingintothegreenseasonherwaytotheSouthernCross。
Thencamethechorus——
’We’llrantandwe’llroarliketrueBritishsailors,We’llrantandwe’llroaracrossthesaltseas,UntilwetakesoundingsintheChannelofOldEnglandFromUshanttoScilly’tisforty—fiveleagues。’?
’Thirty—five—thirty—five,’saidDick,petulantly。’Don’ttamperwithHolyWrit。Goon,Nilghai。’?
’ThefirstlandwemadeitwascalledtheDeadman,’?
andtheysangtotheendveryvigourously。
’Thatwouldbeabettersongifherheadwereturnedtheotherway——totheUshantlight,forinstance,’saidtheNilghai。
’Flinginghisarmsaboutlikeamadwindmill,’saidTorpenhow。’Giveussomethingelse,Nilghai。You’reinfinefog—hornformtonight。’
’Giveusthe"GangesPilot";yousangthatinthesquarethenightbeforeEl—Maghrib。Bytheway,Iwonderhowmanyofthechorusarealiveto—night,’saidDick。
Torpenhowconsideredforaminute。’ByJove!IbelieveonlyyouandI。
Raynor,Vicery,andDeenes——alldead;VincentcaughtsmallpoxinCairo,carriedithereanddiedofit。Yes,onlyyouandIandtheNilghai。’
’Umph!Andyetthemenherewho’vedonetheirworkinawell—warmedstudioalltheirlives,withapolicemanateachcorner,saythatIchargetoomuchformypictures。’
’Theyarebuyingyourwork,notyourinsurancepolicies,dearchild,’
saidtheNilghai。
’Igambledwithonetogetattheother。Don’tpreach。Goonwiththe"Pilot。"Whereintheworlddidyougetthatsong?’
’Onatombstone,’saidtheNilghai。’Onatombstoneinadistantland。I
madeitanaccompanimentwithheapsofbasechords。’
’Oh,Vanity!Begin。’AndtheNilghaibegan——
’Ihaveslippedmycable,messmates,I’mdriftingdownwiththetide,Ihavemysailingorders,whileyetananchorride。
AndneveronfairJunemorninghaveIputouttoseaWithclearerconscienceorbetterhope,oraheartmorelightandfree。
’Shouldertoshoulder,Joe,myboy,intothecrowdlikeawedgeStrikewiththehangers,messmates,butdonotcutwiththeedge。
CriesCharnock,"Scatterthefaggots,doublethatBrahminintwo,Thetallpalewidowforme,Joe,thelittlebrowngirlforyou!"
’YoungJoe(you’renearingsixty),whyisyourhidesodark?
Katiehassoftfairblueeyes,whoblackenedyours?——Why,hark!’?
Theywereallsingingnow,Dickwiththeroarofthewindoftheopenseaabouthisearsasthedeepbassvoiceletitselfgo。
’Themorninggun——Ho,steady!thearquebusestome!?
Iha’soundedtheDutchHighAdmiral’sheartasmyleaddothsoundthesea。
’Sounding,soundingtheGanges,floatingdownwiththetide,MooremeclosetoCharnock,nexttomynut—brownbride。
MyblessingtoKateatFairlight——Holwell,mythankstoyou;
Steady!Westeerforheaven,throughsand—driftscoldandblue。’?
’Nowwhatisthereinthatnonsensetomakeamanrestless?’saidDick,haulingBinkiefromhisfeettohischest。
’Itdependsontheman,’saidTorpenhow。
’Themanwhohasbeendowntolookatthesea,’saidtheNilghai。
’Ididn’tknowshewasgoingtoupsetmeinthisfashion。’
’That’swhatmensaywhentheygotosaygood—byetoawoman。It’smoreeasythoughtogetridofthreewomenthanapieceofone’slifeandsurroundings。’
’Butawomancanbe————’beganDick,unguardedly。
’Apieceofone’slife,’continuedTorpenhow。’No,shecan’t。Hisfacedarkenedforamoment。’Shesaysshewantstosympathisewithyouandhelpyouinyourwork,andeverythingelsethatclearlyamanmustdoforhimself。Thenshesendsroundfivenotesadaytoaskwhythedickensyouhaven’tbeenwastingyourtimewithher。’
’Don’tgeneralise,’saidtheNilghai。’Bythetimeyouarriveatfivenotesadayyoumusthavegonethroughagooddealandbehavedaccordingly。
Shouldn’tbeginthesethings,myson。’
’Ishouldn’thavegonedowntothesea,’saidDick,justalittleanxioustochangetheconversation。’Andyoushouldn’thavesung。’
’Theseaisn’tsendingyoufivenotesaday,’saidtheNilghai。
’No,butI’mfatallycompromised。She’sanenduringoldhag,andI’msorryIevermether。Whywasn’tIbornandbredanddeadinathree—pairback?’
’Hearhimblaspheminghisfirstlove!Whyintheworldshouldn’tyoulistentoher?’saidTorpenhow。
BeforeDickcouldreplytheNilghailifteduphisvoicewithashoutthatshookthewindows,in’TheMenoftheSea,’thatbegins,asallknow,’Theseaisawickedoldwoman,’andafterradingthrougheightlineswhoseimageryistruthful,endsinarefrain,slowastheclackingofacapstanwhentheboatcomesunwillinglyuptothebarswherethemensweatandtrampintheshingle。
’"Yethatboreus,Orestoreus!?
Sheiskinderthanye;
Forthecallisonourheart—strings!"
SaidTheMenoftheSea。’?
TheNilghaisangthatversetwice,withsimplecunning,intendingthatDickshouldhear。ButDickwaswaitingforthefarewellofthementotheirwives。
’"Yethatloveus,canyemoveus?
Sheisdearerthanye;
Andyoursleepwillbethesweeter,"
SaidTheMenoftheSea。’?
TheroughwordsbeatliketheblowsofthewavesonthebowsofthericketyboatfromLimainthedayswhenDickwasmixingpaints,makinglove,drawingdevilsandangelsinthehalfdark,andwonderingwhetherthenextminutewouldputtheItaliancaptain’sknifebetweenhisshoulder—blades。Andthego—feverwhichismorerealthanmanydoctors’
diseases,wakedandraged,urginghimwholovedMaisiebeyondanythingintheworld,togoawayandtastetheoldhot,unregeneratelifeagain,——toscuffle,swear,gamble,andlovelightloveswithhisfellows;totakeshipandknowtheseaoncemore,andbyherbegetpictures;totalktoBinatamongthesandsofPortSaidwhileYellow’Tinamixedthedrinks;tohearthecrackleofmusketry,andseethesmokerolloutward,thinandthickenagaintilltheshiningblackfacescamethrough,andinthathelleverymanwasstrictlyresponsibleforhisownhead,andhisownalone,andstruckwithanunfetteredarm。Itwasimpossible,utterlyimpossible,but——
’"Oh,ourfathersinthechurchyard,Sheisolderthanye,Andourgraveswillbethegreener,"
SaidTheMenoftheSea。’?
’Whatistheretohinder?’saidTorpenhow,inthelonghushthatfollowedthesong。
’Yousaidalittletimesincethatyouwouldn’tcomeforawalkroundtheworld,Torp。’
’Thatwasmonthsago,andIonlyobjectedtoyourmakingmoneyfortravellingexpenses。You’veshotyourbolthereandithasgonehome。Goawayanddosomework,andseesomethings。’
’Getsomeofthefatoffyou;you’redisgracefullyoutofcondition,’saidtheNilghai,makingaplungefromthechairandgraspingahandfulofDickgenerallyovertherightribs。’Softasputty——puretallowbornofover—feeding。Trainitoff,Dickie。’
’We’reallequallygross,Nilghai。Nexttimeyouhavetotakethefieldyou’llsitdown,winkyoureyes,gasp,anddieinafit。’
’Nevermind。Yougoawayonaship。GotoLimaagain,ortoBrazil。
There’salwaystroubleinSouthAmerica。’
’DoyousupposeIwanttobetoldwheretogo?GreatHeavens,theonlydifficultyistoknowwhereI’mtostop。ButIshallstayhere,asItoldyoubefore。’
’Thenyou’llbeburiedinKensalGreenandturnintoadipocerewiththeothers,’saidTorpenhow。’Areyouthinkingofcommissionsinhand?Payforfeitandgo。You’vemoneyenoughtotravelasakingifyouplease。’
’You’vethegrisliestnotionsofamusement,Torp。IthinkIseemyselfshippingfirstclassonasix—thousand—tonhotel,andaskingthethirdengineerwhatmakestheenginesgoround,andwhetheritisn’tverywarminthestokehold。Ho!ho!IshouldshipasaloaferifeverIshippedatall,whichI’mnotgoingtodo。Ishallcompromise,andgoforasmalltriptobeginwith。’
’That’ssomethingatanyrate。Wherewillyougo?’saidTorpenhow。’Itwoulddoyouallthegoodintheworld,oldman。’
TheNilghaisawthetwinkleinDick’seye,andrefrainedfromspeech。
’IshallgointhefirstplacetoRathray’sstable,whereIshallhireonehorse,andtakehimverycarefullyasfarasRichmondHill。ThenIshallwalkhimbackagain,incaseheshouldaccidentallyburstintoalatherandmakeRathrayangry。Ishalldothatto—morrow,forthesakeofairandexercise。’
’Bah!’DickhadbarelytimetothrowuphisarmandwardoffthecushionthatthedisgustedTorpenhowheavedathishead。
’Airandexerciseindeed,’saidtheNilghai,sittingdownheavilyonDick。
’Let’sgivehimalittleofboth。Getthebellows,Torp。’
Atthispointtheconferencebrokeupindisorder,becauseDickwouldnotopenhismouthtilltheNilghaiheldhisnosefast,andtherewassometroubleinforcingthenozzleofthebellowsbetweenhisteeth;andevenwhenitwasthereheweaklytriedtopuffagainsttheforceoftheblast,andhischeeksblewupwithagreatexplosion;andtheenemybecominghelplesswithlaughterhesobeatthemovertheheadwithasoftsofacushionthatthatbecameunsewnanddistributeditsfeathers,andBinkie,interferinginTorpenhow’sinterests,wasbundledintothehalf—emptybagandadvisedtoscratchhiswayout,whichhedidafterawhile,travellingrapidlyupanddownthefloorintheshapeofanagitatedgreenhaggis,andwhenhecameoutlookingforsatisfaction,thethreepillarsofhisworldwerepickingfeathersoutoftheirhair。
’Aprophethasnohonourinhisowncountry,’saidDick,ruefully,dustinghisknees。’Thisfilthyfluffwillneverbrushoffmylegs。’
’Itwasallforyourowngood,’saidtheNilghai。’Nothinglikeairandexercise。’
’Allforyourgood,’saidTorpenhow,notintheleastwithreferencetopastclowning。’Itwouldletyoufocusthingsattheirproperworthandpreventyourbecomingslackinthishothouseofatown。Indeeditwould,oldman。Ishouldn’thavespokenifIhadn’tthoughtso。Only,youmakeajokeofeverything。’
’BeforeGodIdonosuchthing,’saidDick,quicklyandearnestly。’Youdon’tknowmeifyouthinkthat。’
Idon’tthinkit,’saidtheNilghai。
’Howcanfellowslikeourselves,whoknowwhatlifeanddeathreallymean,daretomakeajokeofanything?Iknowwepretendit,tosaveourselvesfrombreakingdownorgoingtotheotherextreme。Can’tIsee,oldman,howyou’realwaysanxiousaboutme,andtrytoadvisemetomakemyworkbetter?DoyousupposeIdon’tthinkaboutthatmyself?
Butyoucan’thelpme——youcan’thelpme——notevenyou。Imustplaymyownhandaloneinmyownway。’
’Hear,hear,’fromtheNilghai。
’What’stheonethingintheNilghaiSagathatI’veneverdrawnintheNungapungaBook?’DickcontinuedtoTorpenhow,whowasalittleastonishedattheoutburst。
NowtherewasoneblankpageinthebookgivenovertothesketchthatDickhadnotdrawnofthecrowningexploitintheNilghai’slife;whenthatman,beingyoungandforgettingthathisbodyandbonesbelongedtothepaperthatemployedhim,hadriddenoversunburnedslipperygrassintherearofBredow’sbrigadeonthedaythatthetroopersflungthemselvesatCaurobert’sartillery,andforaughttheyknewtwentybattalionsinfront,tosavethebattered24thGermanInfantry,togivetimetodecidethefateofVionville,andtolearneretheirremnantcamebacktoFlavigaythatcavalrycanattackandcrumpleandbreakunshakeninfantry。Wheneverhewasinclinedtothinkoveralifethatmighthavebeenbetter,anincomethatmighthavebeenlarger,andasoulthatmighthavebeenconsiderablycleaner,theNilghaiwouldcomforthimselfwiththethought,’IrodewithBredow’sbrigadeatVionville,’andtakeheartforanylesserbattlethenextdaymightbring。
’Iknow,’hesaidverygravely。’Iwasalwaysgladthatyouleftitout。’
’IleftitoutbecauseNilghaitaughtmewhattheGermanyarmylearnedthen,andwhatSchmidttaughttheircavalry。Idon’tknowGerman。
Whatisit?"Takecareofthetimeandthedressingwilltakecareofitself。"Imustridemyownlinetomyownbeat,oldman。’
’Tempeistrichtung。You’velearnedyourlessonwell,’saidtheNilghai。
’Hemustgoalone。Hespeakstruth,Torp。’
’MaybeI’maswrongasIcanbe——hideouslywrong。Imustfindthatoutformyself,asIhavetothinkthingsoutformyself,butIdaren’tturnmyheadtodressbythenextman。Ithurtsmeagreatdealmorethanyouknownottobeabletogo,butIcannot,that’sall。Imustdomyownworkandlivemyownlifeinmyownway,becauseI’mresponsibleforboth。
Onlydon’tthinkIfrivolaboutit,Torp。Ihavemyownmatchesandsulphur,andI’llmakemyownhell,thanks。’
Therewasanuncomfortablepause。ThenTorpenhowsaidblandly,’WhatdidtheGovernorofNorthCarolinasaytotheGovernorofSouthCarolina?’
’Excellentnotion。Itisalongtimebetweendrinks。Therearethemakingsofaveryfinepriginyou,Dick,’saidtheNilghai。
’I’veliberatedmymind,estimableBinkie,withthefeathersinhismouth。’Dickpickedupthestillindignantoneandshookhimtenderly。
’You’retiedupinasackandmadetorunaboutblind,Binkie—wee,withoutanyreason,andithashurtyourlittlefeelings。Nevermind。Sicvolo,sicjubeo,stetprorationevoluntas,anddon’tsneezeinmyeyebecauseItalkLatin。Good—night。’
Hewentoutoftheroom。
’That’sdistinctlyoneforyou,’saidtheNilghai。’Itoldyouitwashopelesstomeddlewithhim。He’snotpleased。’
’He’dswearatmeifheweren’t。Ican’tmakeitout。Hehasthego—feveruponhimandhewon’tgo。Ionlyhopethathemayn’thavetogosomedaywhenhedoesn’twantto,’saidTorpenhow。
******
InhisownroomDickwassettlingaquestionwithhimself——andthequestionwaswhetheralltheworld,andallthatwastherein,andaburningdesiretoexploitboth,wasworthonethreepennypiecethrownintotheThames。
’Itcameofseeingthesea,andI’macurtothinkaboutit,’hedecided。
’Afterall,thehoneymoonwillbethattour——withreservations;only……
onlyIdidn’trealisethattheseawassostrong。Ididn’tfeelitsomuchwhenIwaswithMaisie。Thesedamnablesongsdidit。He’sbeginningagain。’
ButitwasonlyHerrick’sNightpiecetoJuliathattheNilghaisang,andbeforeitwasendedDickreappearedonthethreshold,notaltogetherclothedindeed,butinhisrightmind,thirstyandatpeace。
ThemoodhadcomeandgonewiththerisingandthefallingofthetidebyFortKeeling。
CHAPTERIX
’IfIhavetakenthecommonclayAndwroughtitcunninglyIntheshapeofagodthatwasdiggedaclod,Thegreaterhonourtome。’?
’Ifthouhasttakenthecommonclay,AndthyhandsbenotfreeFromthetaintofthesoil,thouhastmadethyspoilThegreatershametothee。’——TheTwoPotters。?
HEDIDnoworkofanykindfortherestoftheweek。ThencameanotherSunday。Hedreadedandlongedforthedayalways,butsincethered—hairedgirlhadsketchedhimtherewasrathermoredreadthandesireinhismind。
HefoundthatMaisiehadentirelyneglectedhissuggestionsaboutline—work。Shehadgoneoffatscorefiledwithsomeabsurdnotionfora’fancyhead。’ItcostDicksomethingtocommandhistemper。
’What’sthegoodofsuggestinganything?’hesaidpointedly。
’Ah,butthiswillbeapicture,——arealpicture;andIknowthatKamiwillletmesendittotheSalon。Youdon’tmind,doyou?’
’Isupposenot。Butyouwon’thavetimefortheSalon。’
Maisiehesitatedalittle。Sheevenfeltuncomfortable。
’We’regoingovertoFranceamonthsoonerbecauseofit。IshallgettheideasketchedouthereandworkitupatKami’s。
Dick’sheartstoodstill,andhecameveryneartobeingdisgustedwithhisqueenwhocoulddonowrong。’JustwhenIthoughtIhadmadesomeheadway,shegoesoffchasingbutterflies。It’stoomaddening!’
Therewasnopossibilityofarguing,forthered—hairedgirlwasinthestudio。Dickcouldonlylookunutterablereproach。
’I’msorry,’hesaid,’andIthinkyoumakeamistake。Butwhat’stheideaofyournewpicture?’
’Itookitfromabook。’
’That’sbad,tobeginwith。Booksaren’ttheplacesforpictures。And————’
’It’sthis,’saidthered—hairedgirlbehindhim。’IwasreadingittoMaisietheotherdayfromTheCityofDreadfulNight。D’youknowthebook?’
’Alittle。IamsorryIspoke。Therearepicturesinit。Whathastakenherfancy?’
’ThedescriptionoftheMelancolia——
’Herfoldedwingsasofamightyeagle,ButalltooimpotenttolifttheregalRobustnessofherearth—bornstrengthandpride。
Andhereagain。(Maisie,getthetea,dear。)
’Theforeheadchargedwithbalefulthoughtsanddreams,Thehouseholdbunchofkeys,thehousewife’sgown,Voluminousindented,andyetrigidAsthoughashellofburnishedmetalfrigid,Herfeetthick—shodtotreadallweaknessdown。’?
Therewasnoattempttoconcealthescornofthelazyvoice。Dickwinced。
’ButthathasbeendonealreadybyanobscureartistbythenameofDurer,’saidhe。’Howdoesthepoemrun?——
’Threecenturiesandthreescoreyearsago,Withphantasiesofhispeculiarthought。
YoumightaswelltrytorewriteHamlet。Itwillbeawasteoftime。
’No,itwon’t,’saidMaisie,puttingdowntheteacupswithaclattertoreassureherself。’AndImeantodoit。Can’tyouseewhatabeautifulthingitwouldmake?’
’Howinperditioncanonedoworkwhenonehasn’thadthepropertraining?Anyfoolcangetanotion。Itneedstrainingtodrivethethingthrough,——trainingandconviction;notrushingafterthefirstfancy。’Dickspokebetweenhisteeth。
’Youdon’tunderstand,’saidMaisie。’IthinkIcandoit。’
Againthevoiceofthegirlbehindhim——
’Baffledandbeatenback,sheworksonstill;
Wearyandsickofsoul,sheworksthemore。
Sustainedbyherindomitablewill,Thehandsshallfashion,andthebrainshallpore,Andallhersorrowshallbeturnedtolabour————
IfancyMaisiemeanstoembodyherselfinthepicture。’
’Sittingonathroneofrejectedpictures?No,Ishan’t,dear。Thenotioninitselfhasfascinatedme。——Ofcourseyoudon’tcareforfancyheads,Dick。
Idon’tthinkyoucoulddothem。Youlikebloodandbones。’
’That’sadirectchallenge。IfyoucandoaMelancoliathatisn’tmerelyasorrowfulfemalehead,Icandoabetterone;andIwill,too。Whatd’youknowaboutMelacolias?’Dickfirmlybelievedthathewaseventhentastingthree—quartersofallthesorrowintheworld。
’Shewasawoman,’saidMaisie,’andshesufferedagreatdeal,——tillshecouldsuffernomore。Thenshebegantolaughatitall,andthenIpaintedherandsenthertotheSalon。’
Thered—hairedgirlroseupandlefttheroom,laughing。
DicklookedatMaisiehumblyandhopelessly。
’Nevermindaboutthepicture,’hesaid。’AreyoureallygoingbacktoKami’sforamonthbeforeyourtime?’
’Imust,ifIwanttogetthepicturedone。’
’Andthat’sallyouwant?’
’Ofcourse。Don’tbestupid,Dick。’
’Youhaven’tthepower。Youhaveonlytheideas——theideasandthelittlecheapimpulses。Howyoucouldhavekeptatyourworkfortenyearssteadilyisamysterytome。Soyouarereallygoing,——amonthbeforeyouneed?’
’Imustdomywork。’
’Yourwork——bah!……No,Ididn’tmeanthat。It’sallright,dear。Ofcourseyoumustdoyourwork,and——IthinkI’llsaygood—byeforthisweek。’
’Won’tyouevenstayfortea?
’No,thankyou。HaveIyourleavetogo,dear?There’snothingmoreyouparticularlywantmetodo,andtheline—workdoesn’tmatter。’
’Iwishyoucouldstay,andthenwecouldtalkovermypicture。Ifonlyonesinglepicture’sasuccess,itdrawsattentiontoalltheothers。Iknowsomeofmyworkisgood,ifonlypeoplecouldsee。Andyouneedn’thavebeensorudeaboutit。’
’I’msorry。We’lltalktheMelancoliaoversomeoneoftheotherSundays。
Therearefourmore——yes,one,two,three,four——beforeyougo。Good—bye,Maisie。’
Maisiestoodbythestudiowindow,thinking,tillthered—hairedgirlreturned,alittlewhiteatthecornersofherlips。
’Dick’sgoneoff,’saidMaisie。’JustwhenIwantedtotalkaboutthepicture。Isn’titselfishofhim?’
Hercompanionopenedherlipsasiftospeak,shutthemagain,andwentonreadingTheCityofDreadfulNight。
DickwasinthePark,walkingroundandroundatreethathehadchosenashisconfidanteformanySundayspast。Hewasswearingaudibly,andwhenhefoundthattheinfirmitiesoftheEnglishtonguehemmedinhisrage,hesoughtconsolationinArabic,whichisexpresslydesignedfortheuseoftheafflicted。Hewasnotpleasedwiththerewardofhispatientservice;norwashepleasedwithhimself;anditwaslongbeforehearrivedatthepropositionthatthequeencoulddonowrong。
’It’salosinggame,’hesaid。’I’mworthnothingwhenawhimofhersisinquestion。ButinalosinggameatPortSaidweusedtodoublethestakesandgoon。ShedoaMelancolia!Shehasn’tthepower,ortheinsight,orthetraining。Onlythedesire。She’scursedwiththecurseofReuben。Shewon’tdoline—work,becauseitmeansrealwork;andyetshe’sstrongerthanIam。I’llmakeherunderstandthatIcanbeatheronherownMelancolia。Eventhenshewouldn’tcare。ShesaysIcanonlydobloodandbones。Idon’tbelieveshehasbloodinherveins。AllthesameIloverher;andImustgoonlovingher;andifIcanhumbleherinordinatevanityIwill。I’lldoaMelancoliathatshallbesomethinglikeaMelancolia——"theMelancoliathattranscendsallwit。"I’lldoitatonce,con——blessher。’
Hediscoveredthatthenotionwouldnotcometoorder,andthathecouldnotfreehismindforanhourfromthethoughtofMaisie’sdeparture。HetookverysmallinterestinherroughstudiesfortheMelancoliawhensheshowedthemnextweek。TheSundayswereracingpast,andthetimewasathandwhenallthechurchbellsinLondoncouldnotringMaisiebacktohim。OnceortwicehesaidsomethingtoBinkieabout’hermaphroditicfutilities,’butthelittledogreceivedsomanyconfidencesbothfromTorpenhowandDickthathedidnottroublehistulip—earstolisten。
Dickwaspermittedtoseethegirlsoff。TheyweregoingbytheDovernight—boat;andtheyhopedtoreturninAugust。ItwasthenFebruary,andDickfeltthathewasbeinghardlyused。MaisiewassobusystrippingthesmallhouseacrossthePark,andpackinghercanvases,thatshehadnottimeforthought。DickwentdowntoDoverandwastedadaytherefrettingoverawonderfulpossibility。WouldMaisieattheverylastallowhimonesmallkiss?Hereflectedthathemightcaptureherbythestrongarm,ashehadseemwomencapturedintheSouthernSoudan,andleadheraway;butMaisiewouldneverbeled。Shewouldturnhergrayeyesuponhimandsay,’Dick,howselfishyouare!’Thenhiscouragewouldfailhim。Itwouldbebetter,afterall,tobegforthatkiss。
Maisielookedmorethanusuallykissableasshesteppedfromthenight—mailontothewindypier,inagraywaterproofandalittlegrayclothtravelling—cap。Thered—hairedgirlwasnotsolovely。Hergreeneyeswerehollowandherlipsweredry。Dicksawthetrunksaboard,andwenttoMaisie’ssideinthedarknessunderthebridge。Themail—bagswerethunderingintotheforehold,andthered—hairedgirlwaswatchingthem。
’You’llhavearoughpassageto—night,’saidDick。’It’sblowingoutside。I
supposeImaycomeoverandseeyouifI’mgood?’
’Youmustn’t。Ishallbebusy。Atleast,ifIwantyouI’llsendforyou。ButIshallwritefromVitry—sur—Marne。Ishallhaveheapsofthingstoconsultyouabout。Oh,Dick,youhavebeensogoodtome!——sogoodtome!’
’Thankyouforthat,dear。Ithasn’tmadeanydifference,hasit?’
’Ican’ttellafib。Ithasn’t——inthatway。Butdon’tthinkI’mnotgrateful。’
’Damnthegratitude!’saidDick,huskily,tothepaddle—box。
’What’stheuseofworrying?YouknowIshouldruinyourlife,andyou’druinmine,asthingsarenow。YourememberwhatyousaidwhenyouweresoangrythatdayinthePark?Oneofushastobebroken。
Can’tyouwaittillthatdaycomes?’
’No,love。Iwantyouunbroken——alltomyself。’
Maisieshookherhead。’MypoorDick,whatcanIsay!’
’Don’tsayanything。Givemeakiss。Onlyonekiss,Maisie。I’llswearI
won’ttakeanymore。Youmightaswell,andthenIcanbesureyou’regrateful。’
Maisieputhercheekforward,andDicktookhisrewardinthedarkness。
Itwasonlyonekiss,but,sincetherewasnotime—limitspecified,itwasalongone。Maisiewrenchedherselffreeangrily,andDickstoodabashedandtinglingfromheadtotoe。
’Good—bye,darling。Ididn’tmeantoscareyou。I’msorry。Only——keepwellanddogoodwork,——speciallytheMelancolia。I’mgoingtodoone,too。RemembermetoKami,andbecarefulwhatyoudrink。Countrydrinking—waterisbadeverywhere,butit’sworseinFrance。Writetomeifyouwantanything,andgood—bye。Saygood—byetothewhatever—you—call—umgirl,and——can’tIhaveanotherkiss?No。You’requiteright。Good—bye。’
Ashouldtoldhimthatitwasnotseemlytochargeofthemail—bagincline。Hereachedthepierasthesteamerbegantomoveoff,andhefollowedherwithhisheart。
’Andthere’snothing——nothinginthewideworld——tokeepusapartexceptherobstinacy。TheseCalaisnight—boatsaremuchtoosmall。I’llgetTorptowritetothepapersaboutit。She’sbeginningtopitchalready。’
MaisiestoodwhereDickhadlefthertillsheheardalittlegaspingcoughatherelbow。Thered—hairedgirl’seyeswerealightwithcoldflame。
’Hekissedyou!’shesaid。’Howcouldyoulethim,whenhewasn’tanythingtoyou?Howdaredyoutotakeakissfromhim?Oh,Maisie,let’sgototheladies’cabin。I’msick,——deadlysick。’
’Wearen’tintoopenwateryet。Godown,dear,andI’llstayhere。Idon’tlikethesmelloftheengines……PoorDick!Hedeservedone,——onlyone。
ButIdidn’tthinkhe’dfrightenmeso。’
Dickreturnedtotownnextdayjustintimeforlunch,forwhichhehadtelegraphed。Tohisdisgust,therewereonlyemptyplatesinthestudio。
Helifteduphisvoicelikethebearsinthefairy—tale,andTorpenhowentered,lookingguilty。
’H’sh!’saidhe。’Don’tmakesuchanoise。Itookit。Comeintomyrooms,andI’llshowyouwhy。’
Dickpausedamazedatthethreshold,foronTorpenhow’ssofalayagirlasleepandbreathingheavily。Thelittlecheapsailor—hat,theblue—and—whitedress,fitterforJunethanforFebruary,dabbledwithmudattheskirts,thejackettrimmedwithimitationAstrakhanandrippedattheshoulder—seams,theone—and—elevenpennyumbrella,and,aboveall,thedisgracefulconditionofthekid—toppedboots,declaredallthings。
’Oh,Isay,oldman,thisistoobad!Youmustn’tbringthissortuphere。
Theystealthingsfromtherooms。’
’Itlooksbad,Iadmit,butIwascominginafterlunch,andshestaggeredintothehall。Ithoughtshewasdrunkatfirst,butitwascollapse。I
couldn’tleaveherasshewas,soIbroughtheruphereandgaveheryourlunch。Shewasfaintingfromwantoffood。Shewentfastasleeptheminuteshehadfinished。’
’Iknowsomethingofthatcomplaint。She’sbeenlivingonsausages,I
suppose。Torp,youshouldhavehandedherovertoapolicemanforpresumingtofaintinarespectablehouse。Poorlittlewretch!Lookattheface!Thereisn’tanounceofimmoralityinit。Onlyfolly,——slack,fatuous,feeble,futilefolly。It’satypicalhead。D’younoticehowtheskullbeginstoshowthroughthefleshpaddingonthefaceandcheek—bone?’
’Whatacold—bloodedbarbarianitis!Don’thitawomanwhenshe’sdown。Can’twedoanything?Shewassimplydroppingwithstarvation。
Shealmostfellintomyarms,andwhenshegottothefoodsheatelikeawildbeast。Itwashorrible。’
’Icangivehermoney,whichshewouldprobablyspendindrinks。Isshegoingtosleepforever?’
Thegirlopenedhereyesandglaredatthemenbetweenterrorandeffrontery。
’Feelingbetter?’saidTorpenhow。
’Yes。Thankyou。Therearen’tmanygentlementhatareaskindasyouare。Thankyou。’
’Whendidyouleaveservice?’saidDick,whohadbeenwatchingthescarredandchappedhands。
’HowdidyouknowIwasinservice?Iwas。Generalservant。Ididn’tlikeit。’
’Andhowdoyoulikebeingyourownmistress?’
’DoIlookasifIlikedit?’
’Isupposenot。Onemoment。Wouldyoubegoodenoughtoturnyourfacetothewindow?’
Thegirlobeyed,andDickwatchedherfacekeenly,——sokeenlythatshemadeasiftohidebehindTorpenhow。
’Theeyeshaveit,’saidDick,walkingupanddown。’Theyaresuperbeyesformybusiness。And,afterall,everyheaddependsontheeyes。Thishasbeensentfromheaventomakeupfor——whatwastakenaway。Nowtheweeklystrain’soffmyshoulders,Icangettoworkinearnest。
Evidentlysentfromheaven。Yes。Raiseyourchinalittle,please。’
’Gently,oldman,gently。You’rescaringsomebodyoutofherwits,’saidTorpenhow,whocouldseethegirltrembling。
’Don’tlethimhitme!Oh,pleasedon’tlethimhitme!I’vebeenhitcruelto—daybecauseIspoketoaman。Don’tlethimlookatmelikethat!He’sreg’larwicked,thatone。Don’tlethimlookatmelikethat,neither!Oh,I
feelasifIhadn’tnothingonwhenhelooksatmelikethat!’
Theoverstrainednervesinthefrailbodygaveway,andthegirlweptlikealittlechildandbegantoscream。Dickthrewopenthewindow,andTorpenhowflungthedoorback。
’Thereyouare,’saidDick,soothingly。’Myfriendherecancallforapoliceman,andyoucanrunthroughthatdoor。Nobodyisgoingtohurtyou。’
Thegirlsobbedconvulsivelyforafewminutes,andthentriedtolaugh。
’Nothingintheworldtohurtyou。Nowlistentomeforaminute。I’mwhattheycallanartistbyprofession。Youknowwhatartistsdo?’
’Theydrawthethingsinredandblackinkonthepop—shoplabels。’
’Idaresay。Ihaven’trisentopop—shoplabelsyet。ThosearedonebytheAcademicians。Iwanttodrawyourhead。’
’Whatfor?’
’Becauseit’spretty。Thatiswhyyouwillcometotheroomacrossthelandingthreetimesaweekateleveninthemorning,andI’llgiveyouthreequidaweekjustforsittingstillandbeingdrawn。Andthere’saquidonaccount。’
’Fornothing?Oh,my!’Thegirlturnedthesovereigninherhand,andwithmorefoolishtears,’Ain’tneithero’youtwogentlemenafraidofmybilkingyou?’
’No。Onlyuglygirlsdothat。Tryandrememberthisplace。And,bytheway,what’syourname?’
’I’mBessic,——Bessie————It’snousegivingtherest。BessieBroke,——Stone—broke,ifyoulike。What’syournames?Butthere,——nooneevergivestherealones。’
DickconsultedTorpenhowwithhiseyes。
’Myname’sHeldar,andmyfriend’scalledTorpenhow;andyoumustbesuretocomehere。Wheredoyoulive?’
’South—the—water,——oneroom,——fiveandsixpenceaweek。Aren’tyoumakingfunofmeaboutthatthreequid?’
’You’llseelateron。And,Bessie,nexttimeyoucome,remember,youneedn’twearthatpaint。It’sbadfortheskin,andIhaveallthecoloursyou’llbelikelytoneed。’
Bessiewithdrew,scrubbinghercheekwitharaggedpocket—handkerchief。Thetwomenlookedateachother。
’You’reaman,’saidTorpenhow。
’I’mafraidI’vebeenafool。Itisn’tourbusinesstorunabouttheearthreformingBessieBrokes。Andawomanofanykindhasnorightonthislanding。’
’Perhapsshewon’tcomeback。’
’Shewillifshethinksshecangetfoodandwarmthhere。Iknowshewill,worseluck。Butremember,oldman,sheisn’tawoman;she’smymodel;
andbecareful。’
’Theidea!She’sadissolutelittlescarecrow,——agutter—snippetandnothingmore。’
’Soyouthink。Waittillshehasbeenfedalittleandfreedfromfear。Thatfairtyperecoversitselfveryquickly。Youwon’tknowherinaweekortwo,whenthatabjectfearhasdiedoutofhereyes。She’llbetoohappyandsmilingformypurposes。’
’Butsurelyyou’renottakingheroutofcharity?——topleaseme?’
’Iamnotinthehabitofplayingwithhotcoalstopleaseanybody。Shehasbeensentfromheaven,asImayhaveremarkedbefore,tohelpmewithmyMelancolia。’
’Neverheardawordabouttheladybefore。’
’What’stheuseofhavingafriend,ifyoumustslingyournotionsathiminwords?YououghttoknowwhatI’mthinkingabout。You’veheardmegruntlately?’
’Evenso;butgruntsmeananythinginyourlanguage,frombad’baccytowickeddealers。AndIdon’tthinkI’vebeenmuchinyourconfidenceforsometime。’
’Itwasahighandsoulfulgrunt。YououghttohaveunderstoodthatitmeanttheMelancolia。’DickwalkedTorpenhowupanddowntheroom,keepingsilence。Thenhesmotehimintheribs,’Nowdon’tyouseeit?
Bessie’sabjectfutility,andtheterrorinhereyes,weldedontooneortwodetailsinthewayofsorrowthathavecomeundermyexperiencelately。Likewisesomeorangeandblack,——twokeysofeach。ButIcan’texplainonanemptystomach。’
’Itsoundsmadenough。You’dbettersticktoyoursoldiers,Dick,insteadofmaunderingaboutheadsandeyesandexperiences。’
’Thinkso?’Dickbegantodanceonhisheels,singing——
’They’reasproudasaturkeywhentheyholdthereadycash,Yououghtto’earthewaytheylaughan’joke;
Theyaretrickyan’they’refunnywhenthey’vegotthereadymoney,——
Ow!butsee’emwhenthey’reallstone—broke。’?
ThenhesatdowntopourouthishearttoMaisieinafour—sheetletterofcounselandencouragement,andregisteredanoaththathewouldgettoworkwithanundividedheartassoonasBessieshouldreappear。
Thegirlkeptherappointmentunpaintedandunadorned,afraidandoverboldbyturns。Whenshefoundthatshewasmerelyexpectedtositstill,shegrewcalmer,andcriticisedtheappointmentsofthestudiowithfreedomandsomepoint。Shelikedthewarmthandthecomfortandthereleasefromfearofphysicalpain。Dickmadetwoorthreestudiesofherheadinmonochrome,buttheactualnotionoftheMelancoliawouldnotarrive。
’Whatamessyoukeepyourthingsin!’saidBessie,somedayslater,whenshefeltherselfthoroughlyathome。’Is’poseyourclothesarejustasbad。
Gentlemenneverthinkwhatbuttonsandtapearemadefor。’
’Ibuythingstowear,andwear’emtilltheygotopieces。Idon’tknowwhatTorpenhowdoes。’
Bessiemadediligentinquiryinthelatter’sroom,andunearthedabaleofdisreputablesocks。’SomeoftheseI’llmendnow,’shesaid,’andsomeI’lltakehome。D’youknow,Isitalldaylongathomedoingnothing,justlikealady,andnomorenoticingthemothergirlsinthehousethaniftheywassomanyflies。Idon’thaveanyunnecessarywords,butIput’emdownquick,Icantellyou,whentheytalktome。No;it’squitenicethesedays。Ilockmydoor,andtheycanonlycallmenamesthroughthekeyhole,andIsitinside,justlikealady,mendingsocks。Mr。Torpenhowwearshissocksoutbothendsatonce。’
’Threequidaweekfromme,andthedelightsofmysociety。Nosocksmended。NothingfromTorpexceptanodonthelandingnowandagain,andallhissocksmended。Bessieisverymuchawoman,’thoughtDick;
andhelookedatherbetweenhalf—shuteyes。Foodandresthadtransformedthegirl,asDickknewtheywould。
’Whatareyoulookingatmelikethatfor?’shesaidquickly。’Don’t。Youlookreg’larbadwhenyoulookthatway。Youdon’tthinkmucho’me,doyou?’
’Thatdependsonhowyoubehave。’
Bessiebehavedbeautifully。Onlyitwasdifficultattheendofasittingtobidhergooutintothegraystreets。Sheverymuchpreferredthestudioandabigchairbythestove,withsomesocksinherlapasanexcusefordelay。ThenTorpenhowwouldcomein,andBessiewouldbemovedtotellstrangeandwonderfulstoriesofherpast,andstillstrangeronesofherpresentimprovedcircumstances。Shewouldmakethemteaasthoughshehadarighttomakeit;andonceortwiceontheseoccasionsDickcaughtTorpenhow’seyesfixedonthetrimlittlefigure,andbecauseBessie’’flittingsabouttheroommadeDickardentlylongforMaisie,herealisedwhitherTorpenhow’sthoughtsweretending。AndBessiewasexceedinglycarefuloftheconditionofTorpenhow’slinen。Shespokeverylittletohim,butsometimestheytalkedtogetheronthelanding。
’Iwasagreatfool,’Dicksaidtohimself。’Iknowwhatredfirelightlookslikewhenaman’strampingthroughastrangetown;andoursisalonely,selfishsortoflifeatthebest。IwonderMaisiedoesn’tfeelthatsometimes。ButIcan’torderBessieaway。That’stheworstofbeginningthings。Oneneverknowswheretheystop。’
Oneevening,afterasittingprolongedtothelastlimitofthelight,DickwasrousedfromanapbyabrokenvoiceinTorpenhow’sroom。Hejumpedtohisfeet。’NowwhatoughtItodo?Itlooksfoolishtogoin。——Oh,blessyou,Binkie!’ThelittleterrierthrustTorpenhow’sdooropenwithhisnoseandcameouttotakepossessionofDick’schair。Thedoorswungwideunheeded,andDickacrossthelandingcouldseeBessieinthehalf—lightmakingherlittlesupplicationtoTorpenhow。Shewaskneelingbyhisside,andherhandswereclaspedacrosshisknee。
’Iknow,——Iknow,’shesaidthickly。’’Tisn’trighto’metodothis,butI
can’thelpit;andyouweresokind,——sokind;andyounevertookanynoticeo’me。AndI’vemendedallyourthingssocarefully,——Idid。Oh,please,’tisn’tasifIwasaskingyoutomarryme。Iwouldn’tthinkofit。
Butyou——couldn’tyoutakeandlivewithmetillMissRightcomesalong?
I’monlyMissWrong,Iknow,butI’dworkmyhandstothebareboneforyou。AndI’mnotuglytolookat。Sayyouwill!’
DickhardlyrecognisedTorpenhow’svoiceinreply——
’Butlookhere。It’snouse。I’mliabletobeorderedoffanywhereataminute’snoticeifawarbreaksout。Ataminute’snotice——dear。’
’Whatdoesthatmatter?Untilyougo,then。Untilyougo。’Tisn’tmuchI’masking,and——youdon’tknowhowgoodIcancook。’Shehadputanarmroundhisneckandwasdrawinghisheaddown。
’Until——I——go,then。’
’Torp,’saidDick,acrossthelanding。Hecouldhardlysteadyhisvoice。