首页 >出版文学> Damaged Goods>第3章

第3章

  "Yes,"saidthemother,hervoicebreaking,"sheis,indeed,apoorlittledaughter!"
  Asilencefell;forwhatcouldwordsavailinsuchasituation?
  Hearingthedooropen,MadameDupontstarted,forhernerveswerealla—quiverwiththestrainshehadbeenunder。Aservantcameinandspoketoher,andshesaidtoGeorge,"Itisthedoctor。
  Ifyouneedme,Ishallbeinthenextroom。"
  Hersonstoodtrembling,asifhewerewaitingtheapproachofanexecutioner。Theothercameintotheroomwithoutseeinghimandhestoodforaminute,claspingandunclaspinghishands,almostovercomewithemotion。Thenhesaid,"Good—day,doctor。"Asthemanstaredathim,surprisedandpuzzled,headded,"Youdon’trecognizeme?"
  Thedoctorlookedagain,moreclosely。Georgewasexpectinghimtobreakoutinrage;butinsteadhisvoicefelllow。"You!"heexclaimed。"Itisyou!"
  Atlast,inavoiceofdiscouragementthanofanger,hewenton,"Yougotmarried,andyouhaveachild!AfterallthatItoldyou!Youareawretch!"
  "Sir,"criedGeorge,"letmeexplaintoyou!"
  "Notaword!"exclaimedtheother。"Therecanbenoexplanationforwhatyouhavedone。"
  Asilencefollowed。Theyoungmandidnotknowwhattosay。
  Finally,stretchingouthisarms,hepleaded,"Youwilltakecareofmylittledaughterallthesame,willyounot?"
  Theotherturnedawaywithdisgust。"Imbecile!"hesaid。
  Georgedidnotheartheword。"Iwasabletowaitonlysixmonths,"hemurmured。
  Thedoctoransweredinavoiceofcoldself—repression,"Thatisenough,sir!Allthatdoesnotconcernme。Ihavedonewrongeventoletyouseemyindignation。Ishouldhaveleftyoutojudgeyourself。Ihavenothingtodoherebutwiththepresentandwiththefuture——withtheinfantandwiththenurse。"
  "Sheisn’tindanger?"criedGeorge。
  "Thenurseisindangerofbeingcontaminated。"
  ButGeorgehadnotbeenthinkingaboutthenurse。"Imeanmychild,"hesaid。
  "Justatpresentthesymptomsarenotdisturbing。"
  Georgewaited;afterawhilehebegan,"Youweresayingaboutthenurse。WillyouconsentthatIcallmymother?SheknowsbetterthanI。"
  "Asyouwish,"wasthereply。
  Theyoungmanstartedtothedoor,butcameback,interribledistress。"Ihaveoneprayertoofferyousir;arrangeitsothatmywife——sothatnoonewillknow。IfmywifelearnedthatitisIwhoamthecause——!ItisforherthatIimploreyou!
  She——sheisn’ttoblame。"
  Saidthedoctor:"Iwilldoeverythinginmypowerthatshemaybekeptignorantofthetruenatureofthedisease。"
  "Oh,howIthankyou!"murmuredGeorge。"HowIthankyou!"
  "Donotthankme;itisforher,andnotforyou,thatIwillconsenttolie。"
  "Andmymother?"
  "Yourmotherknowsthetruth。"
  "But——"
  "Iprayyou,sir——wehaveenoughtotalkabout,andveryseriousmatters。"
  SoGeorgewenttothedoorandcalledhismother。Sheenteredandgreetedthedoctor,holdingherselferect,andstrivingtokeepthesignsofgriefandterrorfromherface。Shesignedtothedoctortotakeaseat,andthenseatedherselfbyalittletablenearhim。
  "MadameDupont,"hebegan,"Ihaveprescribedacourseoftreatmentforthechild。Ihopetobeabletoimproveitscondition,andtopreventanynewdevelopments。Butmydutyandyoursdoesnotstopthere;ifthereisstilltime,itisnecessarytoprotectthehealthofthenurse。"
  "Telluswhatitisnecessarytodo,Doctor?"saidshe。
  "Thewomanmuststopnursingthechild。"
  "Youmeanwehavetochangethenurse?"
  "Madame,thechildcannolongerbebroughtupatthebreast,eitherbythatnurseorbyanyothernurse。"
  "Butwhy,sir?"
  "Becausethechildwouldgiveherdiseasetothewomanwhogavehermilk。"
  "But,Doctor,ifweputheronthebottle——ourlittleone——shewilldie!"
  AndsuddenlyGeorgeburstoutintosobs。"Oh,mypoorlittledaughter!MyGod,myGod!"
  Saidthedoctor,"Ifthefeedingiswellattendedto,withsterilizedmilk——"
  "Thatcandoverywellforhealthyinfants,"brokeinMadameDupont。"Butattheageofthreemonthsonecannottakefromthebreastababylikeours,frailandill。Morethananyothersuchaninfanthasneedofanurse——isthatnottrue?"
  "Yes,"thedoctoradmitted,"thatistrue。But——"
  "Inthatcase,betweenthelifeofthechild,andthehealthofthenurse,youunderstandperfectlywellthatmychoiceismade。"
  BetweenherwordsthedoctorheardthesobbingofGeorge,whoseheadwasburiedinhisarms。"Madame,"hesaid,"yourloveforthatbabyhasjustcausedyoutouttersomethingferocious!Itisnotforyoutochoose。Itisnotforyoutochoose。Iforbidthenursing。Thehealthofthatwomandoesnotbelongtoyou。"
  "No,"criedthegrandmother,wildly,"nordoesthehealthofoutchildbelongtoyou!Ifthereisahopeofsavingit,thathopeisingivingitmorecarethananyotherchild;andyouwouldwishthatIputituponamodeofnourishmentwhichthedoctorscondemn,evenforvigorousinfants!YouexpectthatIwillletmyselfbetakeninlikethat?Iansweryou:sheshallhavethemilkwhichsheneeds,mypoorlittleone!Iftherewasasinglethingthatonecoulddotosaveher——Ishouldbeacriminaltoneglectit!"AndMadameDupontbrokeout,withfuriousscorn,"Thenurse!Thenurse!Weshallknowhowtodoourduty——weshalltakecareofher,repayher。Butourchildbeforeall!Nosir,no!EverythingthatcanbedonetosaveourbabyIshalldo,letitcostwhatitwill。Todowhatyousay——youdon’trealizeit——itwouldbeasifIshouldkillthechild!"Intheendtheagonizedwomanburstintotears。"Oh,mypoorlittleangel!Mylittlesavior!"
  Georgehadneverceasedsobbingwhilehismotherspoke;attheselastwordshissobsbecameloudcries。Hestruckthefloorwithhisfoot,hetorehishair,asifheweresufferingfromviolentphysicalpain。"Oh,oh,oh!"hecried。"Mylittlechild!Mylittlechild!"Andthen,inahorrifiedwhispertohimself,"I
  amawretch!Acriminal!"
  "Madame,"saidthedoctor,"youmustcalmyourself;youmustbothcalmyourselves。Youwillnothelpoutthesituationbylamentations。Youmustlearntotakeitwithcalmness。"
  MadameDupontsetherlipstogether,andwithapainfuleffortrecoveredherself—control。"Youareright,sir,"shesaid,inalowvoice。"Iaskyourpardon;butifyouonlyknewwhatthatchildmeanstome!Ilostoneatthatage。Iamanoldwoman,I
  amawidow——Ihadhardlyhopedtolivelongenoughtobeagrandmother。But,asyousay——wemustbecalm。"Sheturnedtotheyoungman,"Calmyourself,myson。Itisapoorwaytoshowourloveforthechild,toabandonourselvestotears。Letustalk,Doctor,andseriously——coldly。ButIdeclaretoyouthatnothingwilleverinducemetoputthechildonthebottle,whenIknowthatitmightkillher。ThatisallIcansay。"
  Thedoctorreplied:"Thisisn’tthefirsttimethatIfindmyselfinthepresentsituation。Madame,Ideclaretoyouthatalways——ALWAYS,youunderstand——personswhohaverejectedmyadvicehavehadreasontorepentitcruelly。"
  "TheonlythingofwhichIshouldrepent——"begantheother。
  "Yousimplydonotknow,"interruptedthedoctor,"whatsuchanurseiscapableof。Youcannotimaginewhatbitterness——
  legitimatebitterness,youunderstand——joinedtotherapacity,thecupidity,themischief—makingimpulse——mightinspirethesepeopletodo。ForthemtheBOURGEOISisalwayssomewhatofanenemy;andwhentheyfindthemselvesinpositiontoavengetheirinferiority,theyareferocious。"
  "Butwhatcouldthewomando?"
  "Whatcouldshedo?Shecouldbringlegalproceedingsagainstyou。"
  "Butsheismuchtoostupidtohavethatidea。"
  "Otherswillputitintohermind。"
  "Sheistoopoortopaythepreliminaryexpenses。"
  "Anddoyouproposethentoprofitbyherignoranceandstupidity?Besides,shecouldobtainjudicialassistance。"
  "Why,surely,"exclaimedMadameDupont,"suchathingwasneverheardof!Doyoumeanthat?"
  "Iknowadozenprosecutionsofthatsort;andalwayswhentherehasbeencertainty,theparentshavelosttheircase。"
  "Butsurely,Doctor,youmustbemistaken!Notinacaselikeours——notwhenitisaquestionofsavingthelifeofapoorlittleinnocent!"
  "Oftentimesexactlysuchfactshavebeenpresented。"
  HereGeorgebrokein。"Icangiveyouthedatesofthedecisions。"Herosefromhischair,gladofanopportunitytobeuseful。"Ihavethebooks,"hesaid,andtookonefromthecaseandbroughtittothedoctor。
  "Allofthatisnouse——"interposedthemother。
  ButthedoctorsaidtoGeorge,"Youwillbeabletoconvinceyourself。Theparentshavebeenforcedonceortwicetopaythenursearegularincome,andatothertimestheyhavehadtopayheranindemnity,ofwhichthefigurehasvariedbetweenthreeandeightthousandfrancs。"
  MadameDupontwasreadywithareplytothis。"Neverfear,sir!
  Ifthereshouldbeasuit,weshouldhaveagoodlawyer。Weshallbeabletopayandchoosethebest——andhewoulddemand,withoutdoubt,whichofthetwo,thenurseorthechild,hasgiventhediseasetotheother。"
  Thedoctorwasstaringatherinhorror。"Doyounotperceivethatwouldbeamonstrousthingtodo?"
  "Oh,Iwouldnothavetosayit,"wasthereply。"Thelawyerwouldseetoit——isnotthathisprofession?Mypointisthis:
  byonemeansoranotherhewouldmakeuswinourcase。"
  "Andthescandalthatwouldresult,"repliedtheother。"Haveyouthoughtofthat?"
  HereGeorge,whohadbeenlookingoverhislaw—books,brokein。
  "Doctor,permitmetogiveyoualittleinformation。Incasesofthissort,thenamesareneverprinted。"
  "Yes,buttheyarespokenatthehearings。"
  "That’strue。"
  "Andareyoucertainthattherewillnotbeanynewspapertoprintthejudgment?"
  "Whatwon’ttheystoopto,"exclaimedMadameDupont——"thosefilthyjournals!"
  "Ah,"saidtheother,"andseewhatascandal?Whatashameitwouldbetoyou!"
  "Thedoctorisright,mother,"exclaimedtheyoungman。
  ButMadameDupontwasnotyetconvinced。"Wewillpreventthewomanfromtakinganysteps;wewillgiveherwhatshedemandsfromus。"
  "Butthen,"saidtheother,"youwillgiveyourselvesuptotheriskofblackmail。Iknowafamilywhichhasbeenthusheldupforovertwelveyears。"
  "Ifyouwillpermitme,Doctor,"saidGeorge,timidly,"shecouldbemadetosignareceipt。"
  "Forpaymentinfull?"askedthedoctor,scornfully。
  "Evenso。"
  "Andthen,"addedhismother,"shewouldbemorethandelightedtogobacktohercountrywithafullpurse。Shewouldbeabletobuyalittlehouseandabitofground——inthatcountryonedoesn’tneedsomuchinordertolive。"
  Atthismomenttherewasatapuponthedoor,andthenurseentered。Shewasacountrywoman,robust,rosy—cheeked,fairlyburstingwithhealth。Whenshespokeonegottheimpressionthathervoicewasmorethanshecouldcontain。Itdidnotbelonginadrawing—room,butundertheopenskyofhercountryhome。
  "Sir,"shesaid,addressingthedoctor,"thebabyisawake。"
  "Iwillgoandseeher,"wasthereply;andthentoMadameDupont,"Wewilltakeupthisconversationlateron。"
  "Certainly,"saidthemother。"Willyouhaveneedofthenurse?"
  "No,Madame,"thedoctoranswered。
  "Nurse,"saidthemother,"sitdownandrest。Waitaminute,I
  wishtospeaktoyou。"Asthedoctorwentout,shetookhersontoonesideandwhisperedtohim,"Iknowthewaytoarrangeeverything。Ifweletherknowwhatisthematter,andifsheaccepts,thedoctorwillhavenothingmoretosay。Isn’tthatso?"
  "Obviously,"repliedtheson。
  "Iamgoingtopromisethatwewillgivehertwothousandfrancswhenshegoesaway,ifshewillconsenttocontinuenursingthechild。"
  "Twothousandfrancs?"saidtheother。"Isthatenough?"
  "Iwillsee,"wasthereply。"Ifshehesitates,Iwillgofurther。Letmeattendtoit。"
  Georgenoddedhisassent,andMadameDupontreturnedtothenurse。"Youknow,"shesaid,"thatourchildisalittlesick?"
  Theotherlookedatherinsurprise。"Whyno,ma’am!"
  "Yes,"saidthegrandmother。
  "But,ma’am,Ihavetakenthebestofcareofher;Ihavealwayskeptherproper。"
  "Iamnotsayinganythingtothecontrary,"saidMadameDupont,"butthechildissick,thedoctorshavesaidit。"
  Thenursewasnottobepersuaded;shethoughttheyweregettingreadytoscoldher。"Humph,"shesaid,"that’safinething——thedoctors!Iftheycouldn’talwaysfindsomethingwrongyou’dsaytheydidn’tknowtheirbusiness。"
  "Butourdoctorisagreatdoctor;andyouhaveseenyourselfthatourchildhassomelittlepimples。"
  "Ah,ma’am,"saidthenurse,"that’stheheat——it’snothingbuttheheatofthebloodbreakingout。Youdon’tneedtobotheryourself;Itellyouit’sonlythechild’sblood。It’snotmyfault;Isweartoyouthatshehadnotlackedanything,andthatIhavealwayskeptherproper。"
  "Iamnotreproachingyou——"
  "Whatistheretoreproachmefor?Oh,whatbadluck!She’stiny——thelittleone——she’sabitfeeble;butLordsaveus,she’sacitychild!Andshe’sgettingalongallright,Itellyou。"
  "No,"persistedMadameDupont,"Itellyou——shehasgotacoldinherhead,andshehasaneruptionatthebackofthethroat。"
  "Well,"criedthenurse,angrily,"ifshehas,it’sbecausethedoctorscratchedherwiththatspoonheputintohermouthwrongendfirst!Acoldinthehead?Yes,that’strue;butifshehascaughtcold,Ican’tsaywhen,Idon’tknowanythingaboutit——
  nothing,nothingatall。Ihavealwayskeptherwellcovered;
  she’salwayshadasmuchasthreecoversonher。Thetruthis,itwaswhenyoucame,thetimebeforelast;youwereallthetimeinsistinguponopeningthewindowsinthehouse!"
  "ButoncemoreItellyou,"criedMadameDupont,"wearenotputtinganyblameonyou。"
  "Yes,"criedthewoman,morevehemently。"Iknowwhatthatkindoftalkmeans。It’snouse——whenyou’reapoorcountrywoman。"
  "Whatareyouimaginingnow?"demandedtheother。
  "Oh,that’sallright。It’snousewhenyou’reapoorcountrywoman。"
  "Irepeattoyouoncemore,"criedMadameDupont,withdifficultycontrollingherimpatience,"wehavenothingwhatevertoblameyoufor。"
  Butthenursebegantoweep。"IfIhadknownthatanythinglikethiswascomingtome——"
  "Wehavenothingtoblameyoufor,"declaredtheother。"Weonlywishtowarnyouthatyoumightpossiblycatchthediseaseofthechild。"
  Thewomanpouted。"Acoldinthehead!"sheexclaimed。"Well,ifIcatchit,itwon’tbethefirsttime。Iknowhowtoblowmynose。"
  "Butyoumightalsogetthepimples。"
  Atthisthenurseburstintolaughtersoloudthatthebric—a—bracrattled。"Oh,oh,oh!Dearlady,letmetellyou,weain’tcityfolks,weain’t;wedon’thavesuchsoftskins。
  Whatsortoftalkisthat?Pimples——whatdifferencewouldthatmaketopoorfolkslikeus?Wedon’thaveawhitecomplexionliketheladiesofParis。Weareoutalldayinthefields,inthesunandtherain,insteadofrubbingcoldcreamonourmuzzles!Nooffense,ma’am——butIsayifyou’relookingforanexcusetogetridofme,youmustgetabetteronethanthat。"
  "Excuse!"exclaimedtheother。"Whatintheworlddoyoumean?"
  "Oh,Iknow!"saidthenurse,noddingherhead。
  "Butspeak!"
  "It’snouse,whenyou’reonlyapoorcountrywoman。"
  "Idon’tunderstandyou!IsweartoyouthatIdon’tunderstandyou!"
  "Well,"sneeredtheother,"Iunderstand。"
  "Butthen——explainyourself。"
  "No,Idon’twanttosayit。"
  "Butyoumust;Iwishit。"
  "Well——"
  "Goahead。"
  "I’monlyapoorcountrywoman,butIamnomorestupidthantheothers,forallthat。Iknowperfectlywellwhatyourtricksmean。Mr。Georgeherehasbeengrumblingbecauseyoupromisedmethirtyfrancsmoreamonth,ifIcametoParis。"Andthen,turningupontheother,shewenton——"But,sir,isn’titonlynatural?Don’tIhavetoputmyownchildawaysomewhereselse?
  Andthen,canmyhusbandliveonhisappetite?We’renothingbutpoorcountrypeople,weare。"
  "Youaremakingamistake,nurse,"brokeinGeorge。"Itisnothingatallofthatsort;motherisquiteright。Iamsofarfromwantingtoreproachyou,that,onthecontrary,Ithinkshehadnotpromisedenough,andIwanttomakeyou,formypart,anotherpromise。Whenyougoaway,whenbabyisoldenoughtobeweaned,bywayofthankingyou,wewishtogiveyou——"
  MadameDupontbrokein,hurriedly,"Wewishtogiveyou,——overandaboveyourwages,youunderstand——wewishtogiveyoufivehundredfrancs,andperhapsathousand,ifthelittleoneisaltogetheringoodhealth。Youunderstand?"
  Thenursestaredather,stupefied。"Youwillgivemefivehundredfrancs——formyself?"Shesoughttocomprehendthewords。
  "Butthatwasnotagreed,youdon’thavetodothatatall。"
  "No,"admittedMadameDupont。
  "Butthen,"whisperedthenurse,halftoherself,"that’snotnatural。"
  "Yes,"theotherhurriedon,"itisbecausethebabywillhaveneedofextracare。Youwillhavetotakemoretrouble;youwillhavetogiveitmedicines;yourtaskwillbealittlemoredelicate,alittlemoredifficult。"
  "Oh,yes;thenit’ssothatIwillbesuretotakecareofher?
  Iunderstand。"
  "Thenit’sagreed?"exclaimedMadameDupont,withrelief。
  "Yesma’am,"saidthenurse。
  "Andyouwon’tcomelaterontomakereproachestous?Weunderstandoneanotherclearly?Wehavewarnedyouthatthechildissickandthatyoucouldcatchthedisease。Becauseofthat,becauseofthespecialneedofcarewhichshehas,wepromiseyoufivehundredfrancsattheendofthenursing。
  That’sallright,isit?
  "But,mylady,"criedthenurse,allhercupidityawakened,"youspokejustnowofathousandfrancs。"
  "Verywell,then,athousandfrancs。"
  Georgepassedbehindthenurseandgothismotherbythearm,drawinghertooneside。"Itwouldbeamistake,"hewhispered,"ifwedidnotmakehersignanagreementtoallthat。"
  Hismotherturnedtothenurse。"Inorderthattheremaybenomisunderstandingaboutthesum——youseehowitis,IhadforgottenalreadythatIhadspokenofathousandfrancs——wewilldrawupalittlepaper,andyou,onyourpart,willwriteoneforus。"
  "Verygood,ma’am,"saidthenurse,delightedwiththeideaofsoimportantatransaction。"Why,it’sjustasyoudowhenyourentahouse!"
  "Herecomesthedoctor,"saidtheother。"Come,nurse,itisagreed?"
  "Yes,ma’am,"wastheanswer。Butallthesame,asshewentoutshehesitatedandlookedsharplyfirstatthedoctor,andthenatGeorgeandhismother。Shesuspectedthatsomethingwaswrong,andshemeanttofindoutifshecould。
  ThedoctorseatedhimselfinGeorge’sofficechair,asiftowriteaprescription。"Thechild’sconditionremainsthesame,"
  hesaid;"nothingdisturbing。"
  "Doctor,"saidMadameDupont,gravely,"fromnowon,youwillbeabletodevoteyourattentiontothebabyandthenursewithoutanyscruple。Duringyourabsencewehavearrangedmattersnicely。Thenursehasbeeninformedaboutthesituation,andshedoesnotmind。Shehasagreedtoacceptanindemnity,andtheamounthasbeenstated。"
  Butthedoctordidnottakethesetidingsastheotherhadhopedhemight。Hereplied:"Themaladywhichthenursewillalmostinevitablycontractinfeedingthechildistoograveinitsconsequences。Suchconsequencesmightgoasfarascompletehelplessness,evenasfarasdeath。SoIsaythattheindemnity,whateveritmightbe,wouldnotpaythedamage。"
  "But,"exclaimedtheother,"sheacceptsit!Sheismistressofherself,andshehastheright——"
  "Iamnotatallcertainthatshehastherighttosellherownhealth。AndIamcertainthatshehasnottherighttosellthehealthofherhusbandandherchildren。Ifshebecomesinfected,itisnearlycertainthatshewillcommunicatethediseasetothem;thehealthandthelifeofthechildrenshemighthavelateronwouldbegreatlycompromised。Suchthingsshecannotpossiblysell。Come,madame,youmustseethatabargainofthissortisn’tpossible。Iftheevilhasnotbeendone,youmustdoeverythingtoavoidit。"
  "Sir,"protestedthemother,wildly,"youdonotdefendourinterests!"
  "Madame,"wasthereply,"Idefendthosewhoareweakest。"
  "Ifwehadcalledinourownphysician,whoknowsus,"sheprotested,"hewouldhavetakensideswithus。"
  Thedoctorrose,withaseverelookonhisface。"Idoubtit,"
  hesaid,"butthereisstilltimetocallhim。"
  Georgebrokeinwithacryofdistress。"Sir,Iimploreyou!"
  Andthemotherinturncried。"Don’tabandonus,sir!Yououghttomakeallowances!Ifyouknewwhatthatchildistome!I
  tellyouitseemstomeasifIhadwaitedforhercominginordertodie。Havepityuponus!Havepityuponher!Youspeakoftheweakest——itisnotshewhoistheweakest?Youhaveseenher,youhaveseenthatpoorlittlebaby,soemaciated!Youhaveseenwhataheapofsufferingsheisalready;andcannotthatinspireinyouanysympathy?Iprayyou,sir——Iprayyou!"
  "Ipityher,"saidthedoctor,"Iwouldliketosaveher——andI
  willdoeverythingforher。Butdonotaskmetosacrificetoafeebleinfant,withanuncertainandprobablyunhappylife,thehealthofasoundandrobustwoman。Itisuselessforustocontinuesuchadiscussionasthat。"
  WhereuponMadameDupontleapedupinsuddenfrenzy。"VeryWell!"
  sheexclaimed。"Iwillnotfollowyourcounsels,Iwillnotlistentoyou!"
  Saidthedoctorinasolemnvoice:"Thereisalreadysomeoneherewhoregretsthathedidnotlistentome。"
  "Yes,"moanedGeorge,"tomymisfortune,tothemisfortuneofallofus。"
  ButMadameDupontwasquitebesideherself。"Verywell!"shecried。"Ifitisafault,ifitisacrime,ifIshallhavetosufferremorseforitinthislife,andallthepunishmentsinthelifetocome——Iacceptitallformyselfalone!Myselfalone,Itakethatresponsibility!Itisfrightfullyheavy,butIacceptit。IamprofoundlyaChristiansir;Ibelieveineternaldamnation;buttosavemylittlechildIconsenttolosemysoulforever。Yes,mymindismadeup——Iwilldoeverythingtosavethatlife!LetGodjudgeme;andifhecondemnsme,somuchtheworseforme!"
  Thedoctoranswered:"ThatresponsibilityisonewhichIcannotletyoutake,foritwillbenecessarythatIshouldacceptmypart,andIrefuseit。"
  "Whatwillyoudo?"
  "Ishallwarnthenurse。Ishallinformherexactly,completely——somethingwhichyouhavenotdone,Ifeelsure。"
  "What?"criedMadameDupont,wildly。"You,adoctor,calledintoafamilywhichgivesyouitsentireconfidence,whichhandsovertoyouitsmostterriblesecrets,itsmosthorriblemiseries——youwouldbetraythem?"
  "Itisnotabetrayal,"repliedtheman,sternly。"Itissomethingwhichthelawcommands;andevenifthelawweresilent,Iwouldnotpermitafamilyofworthypeopletogoastraysofarastocommitacrime。EitherIgiveupthecase,oryouhavethenursingofthechildstopped。"
  "Youthreaten!Youthreaten!"criedthewoman,almostfrantic。
  "Youabusethepowerwhichyourknowledgegivesyou!Youknowthatitisyouwhoseattentionweneedbythatlittlecradle;youknowthatwebelieveinyou,andyouthreatentoabandonus!
  Yourabandonmentmeansthedeathofthechild,perhaps!AndifI
  listentoyou,ifwestopthenursingofthechild——thatalsomeansherdeath!"
  Sheflungupherhandslikeamadcreature。"Andyetthereisnoothermeans!Ah,myGod!Whydoyounotletitbepossibleformetosacrificemyself?Iwouldwishnothingmorethantobeabletodoit——ifonlyyoumighttakemyoldbody,myoldflesh,myoldbones——ifonlyImightserveforsomething!HowquicklywouldIconsentthatitshouldinfectme——thisatrociousmalady!
  HowIwouldoffermyselftoit——withwhatjoys,withwhatdelights——howeverdisgusting,howeverfrightfulitmightbe,howevermuchtobedreaded!Yes,Iwouldtakeitwithoutfear,withoutregret,ifmypooroldemptybreastsmightstillgivetothechildthemilkwhichwouldpreserveitslife!"
  Shestopped;andGeorgesprangsuddenlyfromhisseat,andfledtoherandflunghimselfdownuponhiskneesbeforeher,minglinghissobsandtearswithhers。
  Thedoctorroseandmovedabouttheroom,unableanylongertocontrolhisdistress。"Oh,thepoorpeople!"hemurmuredtohimself。"Thepoor,poorpeople!"
  Thestormpassed,andMadameDupont,whowasawomanofstrongcharacter,gotherselftogether。Facingthedoctoragain,shesaid,"Come,sir,telluswhatwehavetodo。"
  "Youmuststopthenursing,andkeepthewomanhereasadrynurse,inorderthatshemaynotgoawaytocarrythediseaseelsewhere。Donotexaggeratetoyourselfthedangerwhichwillresulttothechild。Iam,intruth,extremelymovedbyyoursuffering,andIwilldoeverything——Iswearittoyou——thatyourbabymayrecoverasquicklyaspossibleitsperfecthealth。I
  hopetosucceed,andthatsoon。AndnowImustleaveyouuntiltomorrow。"
  "Thankyou,Doctor,thankyou,"saidMadameDupont,faintly。
  Theyoungmanroseandaccompaniedthedoctortothedoor。Hecouldnotbringhimselftospeak,butstoodhanginghisheaduntiltheotherwasgone。Thenhecametohismother。Hesoughttoembraceher,butsherepelledhim——withoutviolence,butfirmly。
  Hersonsteppedbackandputhishandsoverhisface。"Forgiveme!"hesaid,inabrokenvoice。"Arewenotunhappyenough,withouthatingeachother?"
  Hismotheranswered:"Godhaspunishedyouforyourdebauchbystrikingatyourchild。"
  But,grief—strickenastheyoungmanwas,hecouldnotbelievethat。"Impossible!"hesaid。"ThereisnotevenamansufficientlywickedorunjusttocommittheactwhichyouattributetoyourGod!"
  "Yes,"saidhismother,sadly,"youbelieveinnothing。"
  "IbelieveinnosuchGodasthat,"heanswered。
  Asilencefollowed。Whenitwasbroken,itwasbytheentranceofthenurse。Shehadopenedthedooroftheroomandhadbeenstandingthereforsomemoments,unheeded。Finallyshesteppedforward。"Madame,"shesaid,"Ihavethoughtitover;Iwouldrathergobacktomyhomeatonce,andhaveonlythefivehundredfrancs。"
  MadameDupontstaredatherinconsternation。"Whatisthatyouaresaying?Youwanttoreturntoyourhome?"
  "Yes,ma’am,"wastheanswer。
  "But,"criedGeorge,"onlytenminutesagoyouwerenotthinkingofit。"
  "Whathashappenedsincethen?"demandedMadameDupont。
  "Ihavethoughtitover。"
  "Thoughtitover?"
  "Well,Iamgettinglonesomeformylittleoneandformyhusband。"
  "Inthelasttenminutes?"exclaimedGeorge。
  "Theremustbesomethingelse,"hismotheradded。"Evidentlytheremustbesomethingelse。"
  "No!"insistedthenurse。
  "ButIsayyes!"
  "Well,I’mafraidtheairofParismightnotbegoodforme。"
  "Youhadbetterwaitandtryit。"
  "Iwouldrathergobackatoncetomyhome。"
  "Come,now,"criedMadameDupont,"telluswhy?"
  "Ihavetoldyou。Ihavethoughtitover。"
  "Thoughtwhatover?"
  "Well,Ihavethought。"
  "Oh,"criedthemother,"whatastupidreply!’Ihavethoughtitover!Ihavethoughtitover!’ThoughtWHATover,Iwanttoknow!"
  "Well,everything。"
  "Don’tyouknowhowtotelluswhat?"
  "Itellyou,everything。"
  "Why,"exclaimedMadameDupont,"youareanimbecile!"
  Georgesteppedbetweenhismotherandthenurse。"Letmetalktoher,"hesaid。
  Thewomancamebacktoheroldformula:"Iknowthatwe’reonlypoorcountrypeople。"
  "Listentome,nurse,"saidtheyoungman。"Onlyalittlewhileagoyouwereafraidthatwewouldsendyouaway。Youweresatisfiedwiththewageswhichmymotherhadfixed。Inadditiontothosewageswehadpromisedyouagoodsumwhenyoureturnedtoyourhome。Nowyoutellusthatyouwanttogoaway。Yousee?Allatonce。Theremustbesomereason;letusunderstandit。Theremustcertainlybeareason。Hasanybodydoneanythingtoyou?"
  "No,sir,"saidthewoman,droppinghereyes。
  "Well,then?"
  "Ihavethoughtitover。"
  Georgeburstout,"Don’tgoonrepeatingalwaysthesamething——
  ’Ihavethoughtitover!’That’snottellingusanything。"
  Controllinghimself,headded,gently,"Come,tellmewhyyouwanttogoaway?"
  Therewasasilence。"Well?"hedemanded。
  "Itellyou,Ihavethought——"
  Georgeexclaimedindespair,"It’sasifoneweretalkingtoablockofwood!"
  Hismothertookuptheconversationagain。"Youmustrealize,youhavenottherighttogoaway。"
  Thewomananswered,"IWANTtogo。"
  "ButIwillnotletyouleaveus。"
  "No,"interruptedGeorgeangrily,"lethergo;wecannotfastenherhere。"
  "Verywell,then,"criedtheexasperatedmother,"sinceyouwanttogo,go!ButIhavecertainlytherighttosaytoyouthatyouareasstupidastheanimalsonyourfarm!"
  "Idon’tsaythatIamnot,"answeredthewoman。
  "Iwillnotpayyouthemonthwhichhasjustbegun,andyouwillpayyourrailroadfareforyourself。"
  Theotherdrewbackwithalookofanger。"Oho!"shecried。
  "We’llseeaboutthat!"
  "Yes,we’llseeaboutit!"criedGeorge。"Andyouwillgetoutofhereatonce。Takeyourselfoff——Iwillhavenomoretodowithyou。Goodevening。"
  "No,George,"protestedhismother,"don’tlosecontrolofyourself。"Andthen,withagreateffortatcalmness,"Thatcannotbeserious,nurse!Answerme。"
  "Iwouldrathergooffrightawaytomyhome,andonlyhavemyfivehundredfrancs。"
  "WHAT?"criedGeorge,inconsternation。
  "What’sthatyouaretellingme?"exclaimedMadameDupont。
  "Fivehundredfrancs?"repeatedherson。
  "Whatfivehundredfrancs?"echoedthemother。
  "Thefivehundredfrancsyoupromisedme,"saidthenurse。
  "Wehavepromisedyoufivehundredfrancs?WE?"
  "Yes。"
  "Whenthechildshouldbeweaned,andifweshouldbesatisfiedwithyou!Thatwasourpromise。"
  "No。YousaidyouwouldgivethemtomewhenIwasleaving。NowIamleaving,andIwantthem。"
  MadameDupontdrewherselfup,haughtily。"Inthefirstplace,"
  shesaid,"kindlyobligemebyspeakingtomeinanothertone;doyouunderstand?"
  Thewomananswered,"Youhavenothingtodobutgivememymoney,andIwillsaynothingmore。"
  Georgewentalmostbesidehimselfwithrageatthis。"Oh,it’slikethat?"heshouted。"Verywell;I’llshowyou!"Andhesprangtothedoorandopenedit。
  Butthenurseneverbudged。"Givememyfivehundredfrancs!"
  shesaid。
  Georgeseizedherbythearmandshovedhertowardthedoor。
  "Youclearoutofhere,doyouunderstandme?Andasquicklyasyoucan!"
  Thewomanshookherarmloose,andsneeredintohisface。"Comenow,you——youcantalktomealittlemorepolitely,eh?"
  "Willyougo?"shoutedGeorge,completelybesidehimself。"Willyougo,ormustIgooutandlookforapoliceman?"
  "Apoliceman!"demandedthewoman。"Forwhat?"
  "Toputyououtside!Youarebehavingyourselflikeathief。"
  "Athief?I?Whatdoyoumean?"
  "Imeanthatyouaredemandingmoneywhichdoesn’tbelongtoyou。"
  "Morethanthat,"brokeinMadameDupont,"youaredestroyingthatpoorlittlebaby!Youareawickedwoman!"
  "Iwillputyououtmyself!"shoutedGeorge,andseizedherbythearmagain。
  "Oh,it’slikethat,isit?"retortedthenurse。"ThenyoureallywantmetotellyouwhyIamgoingaway?"
  "Yes,tellme!"criedhe。
  Hismotheradded,"Yes,yes!"
  ShewouldhavespokendifferentlyhadshechancedtolookbehindherandseenHenriette,whoatthatmomentappearedinthedoorway。Shehadbeenabouttogoout,whenherattentionhadbeencaughtbytheloudvoices。Shestoodnow,amazed,claspingherhandstogether,whilethenurse,shakingherfistfirstatMadameDupontandthenatherson,criedloudly,"Verywell!I’mgoingawaybecauseIdon’twanttocatchafilthydiseasehere!"
  "HUSH!"criedMadameDupont,andsprangtowardher,herhandsclenchedasifshewouldchokeher。
  "Besilent!"criedGeorge,wildwithterror。
  Butthewomanrushedonwithoutdroppinghervoice,"Oh,youneednotbetroublingyourselvesforfearanyoneshouldoverhear!Alltheworldknowsit!Yourotherservantswerelisteningwithmeatyourdoor!Theyheardeverywordyourdoctorsaid!"
  "Shutup!"screamedGeorge。
  Hermotherseizedthewomanfiercelybythearm。"Holdyourtongue!"shehissed。
  Butagaintheothershookherselfloose。Shewaspowerful,andnowherragewasnottobecontrolled。Shewavedherhandsintheair,shouting,"Letmebe,letmebe!Iknowallaboutyourbrat——thatyouwillneverbeabletoraiseit——thatit’srottenbecauseit’sfatherhasafilthydiseasehegotfromawomanofthestreet!"
  Shegotnofarther。ShewasinterruptedbyafrenziedshriekfromHenriette。Thethreeturned,horrified,justintimetoseeherfallforwarduponthefloor,convulsed。
  "MyGod!"criedGeorge。Hesprangtowardher,andtriedtolifther,butsheshrankfromhim,repellinghimwithagestureofdisgust,ofhatred,ofthemostprofoundterror。"Don’ttouchme!"shescreamed,likeamaniac。"Don’ttouchme!"
  CHAPTERV
  ItwasinvainthatMadameDupontsoughttocontrolherdaughter—
  in—law。Henriettewasbesideherself,frantic,shecouldnotbebroughttolistentoanyone。Sherushedintotheotherroom,andwhentheolderwomanfollowedher,shriekedouttobeleftalone。Afterwards,shefledtoherownroomandbarredherselfin,andGeorgeandhismotherwaiteddistractedlyforhoursuntilsheshouldgivesomesign。
  Wouldshekillherself,perhaps?MadameDuponthoveredonguardaboutthedoorofthenurseryforfearthatthemotherinherfitofinsanitymightattemptsomeharmtoherchild。
  Thenursehadslunkawayabashedwhenshesawtheconsequencesofheroutburst。Bythetimeshehadgotherbelongingspacked,shehadrecoveredherassurance。Shewantedherfivehundred;alsoshewantedherwagesandherrailroadfarehome。Shewantedthematonce,andshewouldnotleaveuntilshegotthem。Georgeandhismother,inthemidstofalltheiranguishofmind,hadtogothroughadisgustingscenewiththiscoarseandangrywoman。
  Theyhadnosuchsumofmoneyinthehouse,andthenurserefusedtoacceptacheck。Sheknewnothingaboutacheck。Itwassomuchpaper,andmightbesometrickthattheywereplayingonher。Shekeptrepeatingheroldformula,"Iamnothingbutapoorcountrywoman。"Norwouldshebecontentedwiththepromisethatshewouldreceivethemoneythenextday。Sheseemedtobeafraidthatifsheleftthehouseshewouldbesurrenderingherclaim。SoatlastthedistractedGeorgetosallyforthandobtainthecashfromsometradesmenintheneighborhood。
  Thewomantookherdeparture。Theymadehersignareceiptinfullforallclaimsandtheystrovetopersuadethemselvesthatthismadethemsafe;butintheirheartstheyhadnorealconvictionofsafety。Whatwasthewoman’ssignature,orherpledgedword,againstthecupidityofherhusbandandrelatives。
  Alwaysshewouldhavethedreadfulsecrettoholdoverthem,andsotheywouldliveundertheshadowofpossibleblackmail。
  LaterinthedayHenriettesentforhermother—in—law。Shewaswhite,hereyeswereswollenwithweeping,andshespokeinavoicechokedwithsobs。Shewishedtoreturnatoncetoherfather’shome,andtotakelittleGervaisewithher。MadameDupontcriedoutinhorroratthisproposition,andarguedandpleadedandwept——butalltonopurpose。Thegirlwasimmovable。
  Shewouldnotstayunderherhusband’sroof,andshewouldtakeherchildwithher。Itwasherright,andnoonecouldrefuseher。
  Theinfanthadbeencryingforhours,butthatmadenodifference。Henrietteinsistedthatacabshouldbecalledatonce。
  SoshewentbacktothehomeofMonsieurLochesandtoldhimthehideousstory。Neverbeforeinherlifehadshediscussedsuchsubjectswithanyone,butnowinheragitationshetoldherfatherall。AsGeorgehaddeclaredtothedoctor,MonsieurLocheswasapersonofviolenttemper;atthisrevelation,atthesightofhisdaughter’sagony,hewasalmostbesidehimself。Hisfaceturnedpurple,theveinsstoodoutonhisforehead;atremblingseizedhim。HedeclaredthathewouldkillGeorge——
  therewasnothingelsetodo。Suchascoundrelshouldnotbepermittedtolive。
  TheeffortwhichHenriettehadtomaketorestrainhimhadacalmingeffectuponherself。Bitterandindignantasshewas,shedidnotwantGeorgetobekilled。Sheclungtoherfather,beseechinghimtopromiseherthathewouldnotdosuchathing;
  andallthatdayandeveningshewatchedhim,unwillingtolethimoutofhersight。
  Therewasamatterwhichclaimedherimmediateattention,andwhichhelpedtowithdrawthemfromthecontemplationoftheirownsufferings。Theinfantmustbefedandcaredfor——theunhappyvictimofotherpeople’ssins,whoselifewasnowimperiled。A
  drynursemustbefoundatonce,anursecompetenttotakeeveryprecautionandgivethechildeverychance。Thisnursemustbeinformedofthenatureofthetrouble——anothermatterwhichrequiredagreatdealofanxiousthought。
  ThateveningcameMadameDupont,tormentedbyanxietyaboutthechild’swelfare,andbeseechingpermissiontohelptakecareofit。Itwasimpossibletorefusesucharequest。Henriettecouldnotenduretoseeher,butthepoorgrandmotherwouldcomeandsitforhoursinthenursery,watchingthechildandthenurse,insilentagony。
  Thiscontinuedfordays,whilepoorGeorgewanderedaboutathome,sufferingsuchtormentofmindascanhardlybeimagined。
  Truly,inthesedayshepaidforhissins;hepaidathousand—
  foldinagonizedandimpotentregret。Helookedbackuponthecourseofhislife,andtracedonebyonetheactswhichhadledhimandthosehelovedintothisnightmareoftorment。Hewouldhavebeenwillingtogivehislifeifhecouldhaveundonethoseacts。Butavengingnatureofferedhimnosucheasydeliveranceasthat。WeshudderaswereadthegrimwordsoftheJehovahoftheancientHebrews;andyetnotallthelearningofmoderntimeshasavailedtodeliverusfromthecrueldecree,thatthesinsofthefathersshallbevisiteduponthechildren。
  Georgewrotenotestohiswife,imploringherforgiveness。Hepouredoutallhisagonyandshametoher,begginghertoseehimjustonce,togivehimachancetopleadhisdefense。Itwasnotmuchofadefense,tobesure;itwasonlythathehaddonenoworsethantheothersdid——onlythathewasawretchedvictimofignorance。Buthelovedher,hehadproventhathelovedher,andhepleadedthatforthesakeoftheirchildshewouldforgivehim。
  Whenallthisavailednothing,hewenttoseethedoctor,whoseadvicehehadsoshamefullyneglected。Hebesoughtthismantointercedeforhim——whichthedoctor,ofcourse,refusedtodo。
  Itwasanextra—medicalmatter,hesaid,andGeorgewasabsurdtoexpecthimtomeddleinit。
  But,asamatteroffact,thedoctorhadalreadybeeninterceding——hehadgonefartherinpleadingGeorge’scausethanhewaswillingtohaveGeorgeknow。ForMonsieurLocheshadpaidhimavisit——hispurposebeingtoaskthedoctortocontinueattendanceupontheinfant,andalsotogiveHenrietteacertificatewhichshecoulduseinhersuitforadivorcefromherhusband。
  Soinevitablytherehadbeenadiscussionofthewholequestionbetweenthetwomen。Thedoctorhadgrantedthefirstrequest,butrefusedthesecond。Inthefirstplace,hesaid,therewasaruleofprofessionalsecrecywhichwouldpreventhim。Andwhenthefather—in—lawrequestedtoknowiftheruleofprofessionalsecrecycompelledhimtoprotectacriminalagainsthonestpeople,thedoctoransweredthatevenifhisethicspermittedit,hewouldstillrefusetherequest。"Iwouldreproachmyselfforever,"hesaid,"ifIhadaidedyoutoobtainsuchadivorce。"
  "Then,"criedtheoldman,vehemently,"becauseyouprofesssuchandsuchtheories,becausetheexerciseofyourprofessionmakesyoutheconstantwitnessofsuchmiseries——thereforeitisnecessarythatmydaughtershouldcontinuetobearthatman’snameallherlife!"
  Thedoctoranswered,gently,"Sir,Iunderstandandrespectyourgrief。Butbelieveme,youarenotinastateofmindtodecideaboutthesemattersnow。"
  "Youaremistaken,"declaredtheother,controllinghimselfwithaneffort。"Ihavebeenthinkingaboutnothingelsefordays。I
  havediscusseditwithmydaughter,andsheagreeswithme。