HethenproceededtoreadachapterfromtheBible;afterwhichhetookhisleavewiththesameaffectionatekindnesswithwhichhehadgreetedme,havingrepeatedhisdesirethatIshouldconsidereverythinginhishouseasaltogetheratmydisposal。ItisneedlesstosaythatI
wasmuchpleasedwithmyuncle——itwasimpossibletoavoidbeingso;andIcouldnothelpsayingtomyself,ifsuchamanasthisisnotsafefromtheassaultsofslander,whois?IfeltmuchhappierthanIhaddonesincemyfather’sdeath,andenjoyedthatnightthefirstrefreshingsleepwhichhadvisitedmesincethatevent。
Mycuriosityrespectingmymalecousindidnotlongremainunsatisfied——heappearedthenextdayatdinner。Hismanners,thoughnotsocoarseasIhadexpected,wereexceedinglydisagreeable;
therewasanassuranceandaforwardnessforwhichIwasnotprepared;therewaslessofthevulgarityofmanner,andalmostmoreofthatofthemind,thanI
hadanticipated。Ifeltquiteuncomfortableinhispresence;therewasjustthatconfidenceinhislookandtonewhichwouldreadencouragementeveninmeretoleration;andIfeltmoredisgustedandannoyedatthecoarseandextravagantcomplimentswhichhewaspleasedfromtimetotimetopayme,thanperhapstheextentoftheatrocitymightfullyhavewarranted。Itwas,however,oneconsolationthathedidnotoftenappear,beingmuchengrossedbypursuitsaboutwhichI
neitherknewnorcaredanything;butwhenhedidappear,hisattentions,eitherwithaviewtohisamusementortosomemoreseriousadvantage,weresoobviouslyandperseveringlydirectedtome,thatyoungandinexperiencedasIwas,even_I_
couldnotbeignorantofhispreference。I
feltmoreprovokedbythisodiouspersecutionthanIcanexpress,anddiscouragedhimwithsomuchvigour,thatIemployedevenrudenesstoconvincehimthathisassiduitieswereunwelcome;butallinvain。
Thishadgoneonfornearlyatwelve-
month,tomyinfiniteannoyance,whenonedayasIwassittingatsomeneedle-workwithmycompanionEmily,aswasmyhabit,intheparlour,thedooropened,andmycousinEdwardenteredtheroom。
Therewassomething,Ithought,oddinhismanner——akindofstrugglebetweenshameandimpudence——akindofflurryandambiguitywhichmadehimappear,ifpossible,morethanordinarilydisagreeable。
’Yourservant,ladies,’hesaid,seatinghimselfatthesametime;’sorrytospoilyourtete-a-tete,butnevermind,I’llonlytakeEmily’splaceforaminuteortwo;
andthenwepartforawhile,faircousin。
Emily,myfatherwantsyouinthecornerturret。Noshilly-shally;he’sinahurry。’
Shehesitated。’Beoff——tramp,march!’
heexclaimed,inatonewhichthepoorgirldarednotdisobey。
Shelefttheroom,andEdwardfollowedhertothedoor。Hestoodthereforaminuteortwo,asifreflectingwhatheshouldsay,perhapssatisfyinghimselfthatnoonewaswithinhearinginthehall。
Atlengthheturnedabout,havingclosedthedoor,asifcarelessly,withhisfoot;andadvancingslowly,asifindeepthought,hetookhisseatatthesideofthetableoppositetomine。
Therewasabriefintervalofsilence,afterwhichhesaid:
’Iimaginethatyouhaveashrewdsuspicionoftheobjectofmyearlyvisit;butIsupposeImustgointoparticulars。
MustI?’
’Ihavenoconception,’Ireplied,’whatyourobjectmaybe。’
’Well,well,’saidhe,becomingmoreathiseaseasheproceeded,’itmaybetoldinafewwords。Youknowthatitistotallyimpossible——quiteoutofthequestion——
thatanoffhandyoungfellowlikeme,andagood-lookinggirllikeyourself,couldmeetcontinually,asyouandIhavedone,withoutanattachment——alikinggrowingupononesideorother;inshort,IthinkIhaveletyouknowasplainasifIspokeit,thatIhavebeeninlovewithyoualmostfromthefirsttimeIsawyou。’
Hepaused;butIwastoomuchhorrifiedtospeak。Heinterpretedmysilencefavourably。
’Icantellyou,’hecontinued,’I’mreckonedratherhardtoplease,andveryhardtoHIT。Ican’tsaywhenIwastakenwithagirlbefore;soyouseefortunereservedme——’
Heretheodiouswretchwoundhisarmroundmywaist。Theactionatoncerestoredmetoutterance,andwiththemostindignantvehemenceIreleasedmyselffromhishold,andatthesametimesaid:
’Ihavenotbeeninsensible,sir,ofyourmostdisagreeableattentions——theyhavelongbeenasourceofmuchannoyancetome;andyoumustbeawarethatIhavemarkedmydisapprobation——mydisgust——
asunequivocallyasIpossiblycould,withoutactualindelicacy。’
Ipaused,almostoutofbreathfromtherapiditywithwhichIhadspoken;andwithoutgivinghimtimetorenewtheconversation,Ihastilyquittedtheroom,leavinghiminaparoxysmofrageandmortification。AsIascendedthestairs,Iheardhimopentheparlour-doorwithviolence,andtaketwoorthreerapidstridesinthedirectioninwhichIwasmoving。I
wasnowmuchfrightened,andranthewholewayuntilIreachedmyroom;andhavinglockedthedoor,Ilistenedbreathlessly,butheardnosound。Thisrelievedmeforthepresent;butsomuchhadI
beenovercomebytheagitationandannoyanceattendantuponthescenewhichIhadjustgonethrough,thatwhenmycousinEmilyknockedatmydoor,Iwasweepinginstronghysterics。
Youwillreadilyconceivemydistress,whenyoureflectuponmystrongdisliketomycousinEdward,combinedwithmyyouthandextremeinexperience。Anyproposalofsuchanaturemusthaveagitatedme;butthatitshouldhavecomefromthemanwhomofallothersImostloathedandabhorred,andtowhomIhad,asclearlyasmannercoulddoit,expressedthestateofmyfeelings,wasalmosttoooverwhelmingtobeborne。Itwasacalamity,too,inwhichIcouldnotclaimthesym-
pathyofmycousinEmily,whichhadalwaysbeenextendedtomeinmyminorgrievances。StillIhopedthatitmightnotbeunattendedwithgood;forI
thoughtthatoneinevitableandmostwelcomeconsequencewouldresultfromthispainfuleclaircissment,inthediscontinuanceofmycousin’sodiouspersecution。
WhenIarosenextmorning,itwaswiththeferventhopethatImightneveragainbeholdtheface,orevenhearthename,ofmycousinEdward;butsuchaconsummation,thoughdevoutlytobewished,washardlylikelytooccur。Thepainfulimpressionsofyesterdayweretoovividtobeatonceerased;andIcouldnothelpfeelingsomedimforebodingofcomingannoyanceandevil。
Toexpectonmycousin’spartanythinglikedelicacyorconsiderationforme,wasoutofthequestion。Isawthathehadsethisheartuponmyproperty,andthathewasnotlikelyeasilytoforegosuchanacquisition——possessingwhatmighthavebeenconsideredopportunitiesandfacilitiesalmosttocompelmycompliance。
Inowkeenlyfelttheunreasonablenessofmyfather’sconductinplacingmetoresidewithafamilyofallwhosemembers,withoneexception,hewaswhollyignorant,andIbitterlyfeltthehelplessnessofmysituation。Idetermined,however,incaseofmycousin’sperseveringinhisaddresses,tolayalltheparticularsbeforemyuncle,althoughhehadneverinkindnessorintimacygoneastepbeyondourfirstinterview,andtothrowmyselfuponhishospitalityandhissenseofhonourforprotectionagainstarepetitionofsuchscenes。
Mycousin’sconductmayappeartohavebeenaninadequatecauseforsuchseriousuneasiness;butmyalarmwascausedneitherbyhisactsnorwords,butentirelybyhismanner,whichwasstrangeandevenintimidatingtoexcess。Atthebeginningoftheyesterday’sinterviewtherewasasortofbullyingswaggerinhisair,whichtowardstheendgaveplacetothebrutalvehemenceofanundisguisedruffian——atransitionwhichhadtemptedmeintoabeliefthathemightseekevenforciblytoextortfrommeaconsenttohiswishes,orbymeansstillmorehorrible,ofwhichI
scarcelydaredtotrustmyselftothink,topossesshimselfofmyproperty。
Iwasearlynextdaysummonedtoattendmyuncleinhisprivateroom,whichlayinacornerturretoftheoldbuilding;andthitherIaccordinglywent,wonderingallthewaywhatthisunusualmeasuremightprelude。WhenIenteredtheroom,hedidnotriseinhisusualcourteouswaytogreetme,butsimplypointedtoachairoppositetohisown。Thisbodednothingagreeable。Isatdown,however,silentlywaitinguntilheshouldopentheconversation。
’LadyMargaret,’atlengthhesaid,inatoneofgreatersternnessthanIthoughthimcapableofusing,’Ihavehithertospokentoyouasafriend,butIhavenotforgottenthatIamalsoyourguardian,andthatmyauthorityassuchgivesmearighttocontrolyourconduct。Ishallputaquestiontoyou,andIexpectandwilldemandaplain,directanswer。HaveIrightlybeeninformedthatyouhavecon-
temptuouslyrejectedthesuitandhandofmysonEdward?’
Istammeredforthwithagooddealoftrepidation:
’Ibelieve——thatis,Ihave,sir,rejectedmycousin’sproposals;andmycoldnessanddiscouragementmighthaveconvincedhimthatIhaddeterminedtodoso。’
’Madam,’repliedhe,withsuppressed,but,asitappearedtome,intenseanger,’IhavelivedlongenoughtoknowthatCOLDNESSanddiscouragement,andsuchterms,formthecommoncantofaworthlesscoquette。Youknowtothefull,aswellasI,thatCOLDNESSANDDISCOURAGEMENT
maybesoexhibitedastoconvincetheirobjectthatheisneitherdistastefulorindifferenttothepersonwhowearsthismanner。Youknow,too,nonebetter,thatanaffectedneglect,whenskilfullymanaged,isamongstthemostformidableoftheengineswhichartfulbeautycanemploy。
Itellyou,madam,thathaving,withoutonewordspokenindiscouragement,permittedmyson’smostmarkedattentionsforatwelvemonthormore,youhavenorighttodismisshimwithnofurtherexplanationthandemurelytellinghimthatyouhadalwayslookedcoldlyuponhim;
andneitheryourwealthnoryourLADYSHIP’
therewasanemphasisofscornontheword,whichwouldhavebecomeSirGilesOverreachhimself’canwarrantyouintreatingwithcontempttheaffectionateregardofanhonestheart。’
Iwastoomuchshockedatthisundisguisedattempttobullymeintoanacquiescenceintheinterestedandunprincipledplanfortheirownaggrandisement,whichInowperceivedmyuncleandhissontohavedeliberatelyenteredinto,atoncetofindstrengthorcollectednesstoframeananswertowhathehadsaid。AtlengthI
replied,withsomefirmness:
’Inallthatyouhavejustnowsaid,sir,youhavegrosslymisstatedmyconductandmotives。Yourinformationmusthavebeenmostincorrectasfarasitregardsmyconducttowardsmycousin;mymannertowardshimcouldhaveconveyednothingbutdislike;andifanythingcouldhaveaddedtothestrongaversionwhichI
havelongfelttowardshim,itwouldbehisattemptingthustotrickandfrightenmeintoamarriagewhichheknowstoberevoltingtome,andwhichissoughtbyhimonlyasameansforsecuringtohimselfwhateverpropertyismine。’
AsIsaidthis,Ifixedmyeyesuponthoseofmyuncle,buthewastoooldintheworld’swaystofalterbeneaththegazeofmoresearchingeyesthanmine;hesimplysaid:
’Areyouacquaintedwiththeprovisionsofyourfather’swill?’
Iansweredintheaffirmative;andhecontinued:
’ThenyoumustbeawarethatifmysonEdwardwere——whichGodforbid——theunprincipled,recklessmanyoupretendtothinkhim’——herehespokeveryslowly,asifheintendedthateverywordwhichescapedhimshouldberegisteredinmymemory,whileatthesametimetheexpressionofhiscountenanceunderwentagradualbuthorriblechange,andtheeyeswhichhefixeduponmebecamesodarklyvivid,thatIalmostlostsightofeverythingelse——’ifhewerewhatyouhavedescribedhim,thinkyou,girl,hecouldfindnobriefermeansthanweddingcontractstogainhisends?’twasbuttogripeyourslenderneckuntilthebreathhadstopped,andlands,andlakes,andallwerehis。’
Istoodstaringathimformanyminutesafterhehadceasedtospeak,fascinatedbytheterribleserpent-likegaze,untilhecontinuedwithawelcomechangeofcountenance:
’Iwillnotspeakagaintoyouuponthis——topicuntilonemonthhaspassed。Youshallhavetimetoconsidertherelativeadvantagesofthetwocourseswhichareopentoyou。Ishouldbesorrytohurryyoutoadecision。Iamsatisfiedwithhavingstatedmyfeelingsuponthesubject,andpointedouttoyouthepathofduty。