Humblecountrypleasureswillenliventhemonotonyofmyfuture。Itshallbemyambitiontoenlargetheoasisroundmyhouse,andtogiveitthelordlyshadeoffinetrees。Myturf,thoughProvencal,shallbealwaysgreen。Ishallcarrymyparkupthehillsideandplantonthehighestpointsomeprettykiosque,whence,perhaps,myeyesmaycatchtheshimmeroftheMediterranean。Orangeandlemontrees,andallchoicestthingsthatgrow,shallembellishmyretreat;andtherewillIbeamotheramongmychildren。ThepoetryofNature,whichnothingcandestroy,shallhedgeusround;andstandingloyallyatthepostofduty,weneedfearnodanger。Myreligiousfeelingsaresharedbymyfather-in-lawandbytheChevalier。
Ah!darling,mylifeunrollsitselfbeforemyeyeslikeoneofthegreathighwaysofFrance,levelandeasy,shadedwithevergreentrees。
ThiscenturywillnotseeanotherBonaparte;andmychildren,ifI
haveany,willnotberentfromme。Theywillbeminetotrainandmakemenof——thejoyofmylife。Ifyoualsoaretruetoyourdestiny,youwhooughttofindyourmateamongstthegreatonesoftheearth,thechildrenofyourReneewillnotlackazealousprotectress。
Farewell,then,formeatleast,totheromancesandthrillingadventuresinwhichweusedourselvestoplaythepartofheroine。Thewholestoryofmylifeliesbeforemenow;itsgreatcriseswillbetheteethingandnutritionoftheyoungMastersdel’Estorade,andthemischieftheydotomyshrubsandme。Toembroidertheircaps,tobelovedandadmiredbyasicklymanatthemouthoftheGemenosvalley——
therearemypleasures。PerhapssomedaythecountrydamemaygoandspendawinterinMarseilles;butdangerdoesnothauntthepurlieusofanarrowprovincialstage。Therewillbenothingtofear,notevenanadmirationsuchascouldonlymakeawomanproud。Weshalltakeagreatdealofinterestinthesilkwormsforwhosebenefitourmulberry-leaveswillbesold!WeshallknowthestrangevicissitudesoflifeinProvence,andthestormsthatmayattackevenapeacefulhousehold。Quarrelswillbeimpossible,forM。del’Estoradehasformallyannouncedthathewillleavethereinsinhiswife’shands;
andasIshalldonothingtoremindhimofthiswiseresolve,itislikelyhemaypersevereinit。
You,mydearLouise,willsupplytheromanceofmylife。Soyoumustnarratetomeinfullallyouradventures,describeyourballsandparties,tellmewhatyouwear,whatflowerscrownyourlovelygoldenlocks,andwhatarethewordsandmannersofthemenyoumeet。Yourotherselfwillbealwaysthere——listening,dancing,feelingherfinger-tipspressed——withyou。IfonlyIcouldhavesomefuninParisnowandthen,whileyouplayedthehouse-motheratLaCrampade!suchisthenameofourgrange。PoorM。del’Estorade,whofanciesheismarryingonewoman!Willhefindouttherearetwo?
Iamwritingnonsensenow,andashenceforthIcanonlybefoolishbyproxy,Ihadbetterstop。Onekiss,then,oneachcheek——mylipsarestillvirginal,hehasonlydaredtotakemyhand。Oh!ourdeferenceandproprietyarequitedisquieting,Iassureyou。There,Iamoffagain……Good-bye,dear。
/P。S。/——Ihavejustopenedyourthirdletter。Mydear,Ihaveaboutonethousandlivrestodisposeof;spendthemformeonprettythings,suchaswecan’tfindhere,norevenatMarseilles。Whilespeedingonyourownbusiness,giveathoughttotherecluseofLaCrampade。
RememberthatonneithersidehavetheheadsofthefamilyanypeopleoftasteinParistomaketheirpurchases。Ishallreplytoyourletterlater。
Theaddressofthisletter,mybrother,willshowyouthattheheadofyourhouseisoutofreachofdanger。IfthemassacreofourancestorsintheCourtofLionsmadeSpaniardsandChristiansofusagainstourwill,itleftusalegacyofArabcunning;anditmaybethatIowemysafetytothebloodoftheAbencerragesstillflowinginmyveins。
FearmadeFerdinand’sactingsogood,thatValdezactuallybelievedinhisprotestations。ButformethepoorAdmiralwouldhavebeendonefor。Nothing,itseems,willteachtheLiberalswhatakingis。ThisparticularBourbonhasbeenlongknowntome;andthemoreHisMajestyassuredmeofhisprotection,thestrongergrewmysuspicions。AtrueSpaniardhasnoneedtorepeatapromise。Aflowofwordsisasuresignofduplicity。
ValdeztookshiponanEnglishvessel。Formyself,nosoonerdidIseethecauseofmybelovedSpainwreckedinAndalusia,thanIwrotetothestewardofmySardinianestatetomakearrangementsformyescape。
Somehardycoralfishersweredespatchedtowaitformeatapointonthecoast;andwhenFerdinandurgedtheFrenchtosecuremyperson,I
wasalreadyinmybaronyofMacumer,amidstbrigandswhodefyalllawandallavengers。
ThelastHispano-MoorishfamilyofGranadahasfoundoncemoretheshelterofanAfricandesert,andevenaSaracenhorse,inanestatewhichcomestoitfromSaracens。Howtheeyesofthesebrigands——whobutyesterdayhaddreadedmyauthority——sparkledwithsavagejoyandpridewhentheyfoundtheywereprotectingagainsttheKingofSpain’svendettatheDucdeSoria,theirmasterandaHenarez——thefirstwhohadcometovisitthemsincethetimewhentheislandbelongedtotheMoors。MorethanascoreofrifleswerereadytopointatFerdinandofBourbon,sonofaracewhichwasstillunknownwhentheAbencerragesarrivedasconquerorsonthebanksoftheLoire。
Myideahadbeentoliveontheincomeofthesehugeestates,which,unfortunately,wehavesogreatlyneglected;butmystaythereconvincedmethatthiswasimpossible,andthatQueverdo’sreportswereonlytoocorrect。Thepoormanhadtwenty-twolivesatmydisposal,andnotasingle/real/;prairiesoftwentythousandacres,andnotahouse;virginforests,andnotastickoffurniture!A
millionpiastresandaresidentmasterforhalfacenturywouldbenecessarytomakethesemagnificentlandspay。Imustseetothis。
Theconqueredhavetimeduringtheirflighttopondertheirowncaseandthatoftheirvanquishedparty。Atthespectacleofmynoblecountry,acorpseformonkstopreyon,myeyesfilledwithtears;I
readinitthepresageofSpain’sgloomyfuture。
AtMarseillesIheardofRiego’send。Painfullydiditcomehometomethatmylifealsowouldhenceforthbeamartyrdom,butamartyrdomprotractedandunnoticed。Isexistenceworthythename,whenamancannolongerdieforhiscountryorliveforawoman?Tolove,toconquer,thistwofoldformofthesamethought,isthelawgravenonoursabres,emblazonedonthevaultedroofsofourpalaces,ceaselesslywhisperedbythewater,whichrisesandfallsinourmarblefountains。Butinvaindoesitnervemyheart;thesabreisbroken,thepalaceinashes,thelivingspringsuckedupbythebarrensand。
Here,then,ismylastwillandtestament。
DonFernand,youwillunderstandnowwhyIputacheckuponyourardorandorderedyoutoremainfaithfultothe/reynetto/。Asyourbrotherandfriend,Iimploreyoutoobeyme;asyourmaster,Icommand。YouwillgototheKingandwillaskfromhimthegrantofmydignitiesandproperty,myofficeandtitles。Hewillperhapshesitate,andmaytreatyoutosomeregalscowls;butyoumusttellhimthatyouarelovedbyMarieHeredia,andthatMariecanmarrynonebutaDucdeSoria。ThiswillmaketheKingradiant。ItistheimmensefortuneoftheHerediafamilywhichalonehasstoodbetweenhimandtheaccomplishmentofmyruin。Yourproposalwillseemtohim,therefore,todeprivemeofalastresource,andhewillgladlyhandovertoyoumyspoils。
YouwillthenmarryMarie。Thesecretofthemutualloveagainstwhichyoufoughtwasnosecrettome,andIhavepreparedtheoldCounttoseeyoutakemyplace。MarieandIweremerelydoingwhatwasexpectedofusinourpositionandcarryingoutthewishesofourfathers;
everythingelseisinyourfavor。Youarebeautifulasachildoflove,andarepossessedofMarie’sheart。Iamanill-favoredSpanishgrandee,forwhomshefeelsanaversiontowhichshewillnotconfess。
SomeslightreluctancetheremaybeonthepartofthenobleSpanishgirlonaccountofmymisfortunes,butthisyouwillsoonovercome。
DucdeSoria,yourpredecessorwouldneithercostyouaregretnorrobyouofamaravedi。Mymother’sdiamonds,whichwillsufficetomakemeindependent,Iwillkeep,becausethegapcausedbytheminthefamilyestatecanbefilledbyMarie’sjewels。Youcansendthem,therefore,bymynurse,oldUrraca,theonlyoneofmyservantswhomIwishtoretain。Noonecanpreparemychocolateasshedoes。
Duringourbriefrevolution,mylifeofunremittingtoilwasreducedtothebarestnecessaries,andthesemysalarywassufficienttoprovide。Youwillthereforefindtheincomeofthelasttwoyearsinthehandsofyoursteward。Thissumismine;butaDucdeSoriacannotmarrywithoutalargeexpenditureofmoney,thereforewewilldivideit。Youwillnotrefusethiswedding-presentfromyourbrigandbrother。Besides,Imeantohaveitso。
ThebaronyofMacumer,notbeingSpanishterritory,remainstome。
ThusIhavestillacountryandaname,shouldIwishtotakeupapositionintheworldagain。
ThankHeaven,thisfinishesourbusiness,andthehouseofSoriaissaved!
AttheverymomentwhenIdropintosimpleBarondeMacumer,theFrenchcannonannouncethearrivaloftheDucd’Angouleme。YouwillunderstandwhyIbreakoff……
October。
WhenIarrivedhereIhadnottendoubloonsinmypocket。Hewouldindeedbeapoorsortofleaderwho,inthemidstofcalamitieshehasnotbeenabletoavert,hasfoundmeanstofeatherhisownnest。ForthevanquishedMoorthereremainsahorseandthedesert;fortheChristianfoiledofhishopes,thecloisterandafewgoldpieces。
Butmypresentresignationismereweariness。Iamnotyetsonearthemonasteryastohaveabandonedallthoughtsoflife。Ozalgahadgivenmeseverallettersofintroductiontomeetallemergencies,amongsttheseonetoabookseller,whotakeswithourfellow-countrymentheplacewhichGalignaniholdswiththeEnglishinParis。Thismanhasfoundeightpupilsformeatthreefrancsalesson。Igotomypupilseveryalternateday,sothatIhavefourlessonsadayandearntwelvefrancs,whichismorethanIrequire。WhenUrracacomesIshallmakesomeSpanishexilehappybypassingontohimmyconnection。
IlodgeintheRueHillerin-Bertinwithapoorwidow,whotakesboarders。Myroomfacessouthandlooksoutonalittlegarden。Itisperfectlyquiet;Ihavegreentreestolookupon,andspendthesumofonepiastreaday。Iamamazedattheamountofcalm,purepleasurewhichIenjoyinthislife,afterthefashionofDionysiusatCorinth。
Fromsunriseuntilteno’clockIsmokeandtakemychocolate,sittingatmywindowandcontemplatingtwoSpanishplants,abroomwhichrisesoutofaclumpofjessamine——goldonawhiteground,colorswhichmustsendathrillthroughanyscionoftheMoors。Atteno’clockIstartformylessons,whichlasttillfour,whenIreturnfordinner。
AfterwardsIreadandsmoketillIgotobed。
Icanputupforalongtimewithalifelikethis,compoundedofworkandmeditation,ofsolitudeandsociety。Behappy,therefore,Fernand;
myabdicationhasbroughtnoafterthoughts;IhavenoregretslikeCharlesV。,nolongingtotrythegameagainlikeNapoleon。FivedaysandnightshavepassedsinceIwrotemywill;tomymindtheymighthavebeenfivecenturies。Honor,titles,wealth,areformeasthoughtheyhadneverexisted。
Nowthattheconventionalbarrierofrespectwhichhedgedmeroundhasfallen,Icanopenmyhearttoyou,dearboy。Thoughcasedinthearmorofgravity,thisheartisfulloftendernessanddevotion,whichhavefoundnoobject,andwhichnowomanhasdivined,notevenshewho,fromhercradle,hasbeenmydestinedbride。Inthisliesthesecretofmypoliticalenthusiasm。Spainhastakentheplaceofamistressandreceivedthehomageofmyheart。AndnowSpain,too,isgone!Beggaredofall,Icangazeupontheruinofwhatoncewasmeandspeculateoverthemysteriesofmybeing。
Whydidlifeanimatethiscarcass,andwhenwillitdepart?Whyhasthatrace,pre-eminentinchivalry,breathedallitsprimitivevirtues——itstropicallove,itsfierypoetry——intothisitslastoffshoot,iftheseedwasnevertoburstitsruggedshell,ifnostemwastospringforth,noradiantflowerscatteraloftitsEasternperfumes?OfwhatcrimehaveIbeenguiltybeforemybirththatIcaninspirenolove?
DidfatefrommyveryinfancydecreethatIshouldbestranded,auselesshulk,onsomebarrenshore!Ifindinmysoultheimageofthedesertswheremyfathersranged,illuminedbyascorchingsunwhichshrivelsupalllife。Proudremnantofafallenrace,vainforce,loveruntowaste,anoldmanintheprimeofyouth,herebetterthanelsewhereshallIawaitthelastgraceofdeath。Alas!underthismurkyskynosparkwillkindletheseashesagaintoflame。ThusmylastwordsmaybethoseofChrist,/MyGod,Thouhastforsakenme!/
Cryofagonyandterror,tothecoreofwhichnomortalhasventuredyettopenetrate!