WhenGodbeholdsourfaults，Heseesalsoourrepentance。Yes，mybelovedmistress，youareright。IfeltthatIhaddispleasedyou，butknewnothow。Nowthatyouhaveexplainedthecauseofyourtrouble，I
　　findinitfreshmotivetoadoreyou。LiketheGodofIsrael，youareajealousdeity，andIrejoicetoseeit。Forwhatisholierandmorepreciousthanjealousy？Myfairguardianangel，jealousyisanever-
　　wakefulsentinel；itistolovewhatpainistothebody，thefaithfulheraldofevil。Bejealousofyourservant，Louise，Ibegofyou；theharderyoustrike，themorecontritewillhebeandkisstherod，inallsubmission，whichprovesthatheisnotindifferenttoyou。
　　But，alas!dear，ifthepainsitcostmetovanquishmytimidityandmasterfeelingsyouthoughtsofeeblewereinvisibletoyou，willHeaven，thinkyou，rewardthem？Iassureyou，itneedednoslightefforttoshowmyselftoyouasIwasinthedaysbeforeIloved。AtMadridIwasconsideredagoodtalker，andIwantedyoutoseeforyourselfthefewgiftsImaypossess。Ifthiswerevanity，ithasbeenwellpunished。
　　Yourlastglanceutterlyunnervedme。NeverhadIsoquailed，evenwhenthearmyofFrancewasatthegatesofCadizandIreadperilformylifeinthedissemblingwordsofmyroyalmaster。VainlyItriedtodiscoverthecauseofyourdispleasure，andthelackofsympathybetweenuswhichthisfactdisclosedwasterribletome。ForintruthIhavenowishbuttoactbyyourwill，thinkyourthoughts，seewithyoureyes，respondtoyourjoyandsuffering，asmybodyrespondstoheatandcold。Thecrimeandtheanguishlayformeinthebreachofunisoninthatcommonlifeoffeelingwhichyouhavemadesofair。
　　“Ihavevexedher!“Iexclaimedoverandoveragain，likeonedistraught。Mynoble，mybeautifulLouise，ifanythingcouldincreasethefervorofmydevotionorconfirmmybeliefinyourdelicatemoralintuitions，itwouldbethenewlightwhichyourwordshavethrownuponmyownfeelings。Muchinthem，ofwhichmymindwasformerlybutdimlyconscious，youhavenowmadeclear。Ifthisbedesignedaschastisement，whatcanbethesweetnessofyourrewards？
　　Louise，formeitwashappinessenoughtobeacceptedasyourservant。
　　YouhavegivenmethelifeofwhichIdespaired。NolongerdoIdrawauselessbreath，Ihavesomethingtospendmyselffor；myforcehasanoutlet，ifonlyinsufferingforyou。OncemoreIsay，asIhavesaidbefore，thatyouwillneverfindmeotherthanIwaswhenfirstI
　　offeredmyselfasyourlowlybondman。Yes，wereyoudishonoredandlost，touseyourownwords，myheartwouldonlyclingthemorecloselytoyouforyourself-soughtmisery。Itwouldbemycaretostaunchyourwounds，andmyprayersshouldimportuneGodwiththestoryofyourinnocenceandyourwrongs。
　　DidInottellyouthatthefeelingsofmyheartforyouarenotalover’sonly，thatIwillbetoyoufather，mother，sister，brother——
　　ay，awholefamily——anythingornothing，asyoumaydecree？Andisitnotyourownwishwhichhasconfinedwithinthecompassofalover’sfeelingsomanyvaryingformsofdevotion？Pardonme，then，ifattimesthefatherandbrotherdisappearbehindthelover，sinceyouknowtheyarenonethelessthere，thoughscreenedfromview。Wouldthatyoucouldreadthefeelingsofmyheartwhenyouappearbeforeme，radiantinyourbeauty，thecentreofadmiringeyes，recliningcalmlyinyourcarriageintheChamps-Elysees，orseatedinyourboxattheOpera!ThenwouldyouknowhowabsolutelyfreefromselfishtaintisthepridewithwhichIhearthepraisesofyourlovelinessandgrace，praiseswhichwarmmyhearteventothestrangerswhoutterthem!Whenbychanceyouhaveraisedmetoelysiumbyafriendlygreeting，myprideismingledwithhumility，andIdepartasthoughGod’sblessingrestedonme。Nordoesthejoyvanishwithoutleavingalongtrackoflightbehind。Itbreaksonmethroughthecloudsofmycigarettesmoke。MorethaneverdoIfeelhoweverydropofthissurgingbloodthrobsforyou。
　　Canyoubeignoranthowyouareloved？Afterseeingyou，Ireturntomystudy，andtheglitterofitsSaracenicornamentssinkstonothingbeforethebrightnessofyourportrait，whenIopenthespringthatkeepsitlockedupfromeveryeyeandlosemyselfinendlessmusingsorlinkmyhappinesstoverse。FromtheheightsofheavenIlookdownuponthecourseofalifesuchasmyhopesdaretopictureit!Haveyounever，inthesilenceofthenight，orthroughtheroarofthetown，heardthewhisperofavoiceinyoursweet，daintyear？DoesnooneofthethousandprayersthatIspeedtoyoureachhome？
　　Bydintofsilentcontemplationofyourpicturedface，Ihavesucceededindecipheringtheexpressionofeveryfeatureandtracingitsconnectionwithsomegraceofthespirit，andthenIpenasonnettoyouinSpanishontheharmonyofthetwofoldbeautyinwhichnaturehasclothedyou。Thesesonnetsyouwillneversee，formypoetryistoounworthyofitstheme，Idarenotsendittoyou。Notamomentpasseswithoutthoughtsofyou，formywholebeingisboundupinyou，andifyouceasedtobeitsanimatingprinciple，everypartwouldache。
　　Now，Louise，canyourealizethetorturetomeofknowingthatIhaddispleasedyou，whileentirelyignorantofthecause？Theidealdoublelifewhichseemedsofairwascutshort。Myheartturnedtoicewithinmeas，hopelessofanyotherexplanation，Iconcludedthatyouhadceasedtoloveme。Withheavyheart，andyetnotwhollywithoutcomfort，Iwasfallingbackuponmyoldpostasservant；thenyourlettercameandturnedalltojoy。Oh!mightIbutlistenforevertosuchchiding!
　　Onceachild，pickinghimselfupfromatumble，turnedtohismotherwiththewords“Forgiveme。“Hidinghisownhurt，hesoughtpardonforthepainhehadcausedher。Louise，Iwasthatchild，andsuchasI
　　wasthen，Iamnow。Hereisthekeytomycharacter，whichyourslaveinallhumilityplacesinyourhands。
　　Butdonotfear，therewillbenomorestumbling。Keeptightthechainwhichbindsmetoyou，sothatatouchmaycommunicateyourlightestwishtohimwhowilleverremainyourslave，FELIPE。
　　Mydearfriend，——Howisitpossiblethatyou，whobroughtyourselfintwomonthstomarryabroken-downinvalidinordertomotherhim，shouldknowanythingofthatterribleshiftingdrama，enactedintherecessesoftheheart，whichwecalllove——adramawheredeathliesinaglanceoralightreply？
　　IhadreservedforFelipeonelastsupremetestwhichwastobedecisive。IwantedtoknowwhetherhislovewastheloveofaRoyalistforhisKing，whocandonowrong。WhyshouldtheloyaltyofaCatholicbelesssupreme？
　　Hewalkedwithmeawholenightunderthelimesatthebottomofthegarden，andnotashadowofsuspicioncrossedhissoul。Nextdayhelovedmebetter，butthefeelingwasasreverent，ashumble，asregretfulasever；hehadnotpresumedaniota。Oh!heisaverySpaniard，averyAbencerrage。HescaledmywalltocomeandkissthehandwhichinthedarknessIreacheddowntohimfrommybalcony。Hemighthavebrokenhisneck；howmanyofouryoungmenwoulddothelike？
　　Butallthisisnothing；Christianssufferthehorriblepangsofmartyrdominthehopeofheaven。ThedaybeforeyesterdayItookasidetheroyalambassador-to-beatthecourtofSpain，mymuchrespectedfather，andsaidtohimwithasmile：
　　“Sir，someofyourfriendswillhaveitthatyouaremarryingyourdearArmandetothenephewofanambassadorwhohasbeenveryanxiousforthisconnection，andhaslongbeggedforit。Also，thatthemarriage-contractarrangesforhisnephewtosucceedonhisdeathtohisenormousfortuneandhistitle，andbestowsontheyoungcoupleinthemeantimeanincomeofahundredthousandlivres，onthebrideadowryofeighthundredthousandfrancs。Yourdaughterweeps，butbowstotheunquestionedauthorityofherhonoredparent。Somepeopleareunkindenoughtosaythat，behindhertears，sheconcealsaworldlyandambitioussoul。
　　“Now，wearegoingtothegentleman’sboxattheOperato-night，andM。leBarondeMacumerwillvisitusthere。“
　　“Macumerneedsatouchofthespurthen，“saidmyfather，smilingatme，asthoughIwereafemaleambassador。
　　“YoumistakeClarissaHarloweforFigaro!“Icried，withaglanceofscornandmockery。“Whenyouseemewithmyrighthandungloved，youwillgivethelietothisimpertinentgossip，andwillmarkyourdispleasureatit。“
　　“Imaymakemymindeasyaboutyourfuture。Youhavenomoregotagirl’sheadpiecethanJeanned’Archadawoman’sheart。Youwillbehappy，youwilllovenobody，andwillallowyourselftobeloved。“
　　Thiswastoomuch。Iburstintolaughter。
　　“Whatisit，littleflirt？“hesaid。
　　“Itrembleformycountry’sinterests……“
　　Andseeinghimlookquiteblank，Iadded：
　　“AtMadrid!“
　　“Youhavenoideahowthislittlenunhaslearned，inayear’stime，tomakefunofherfather，“hesaidtotheDuchess。
　　“Armandemakeslightofeverything，“mymotherreplied，lookingmeintheface。
　　“Whatdoyoumean？“Iasked。
　　“Why，youarenotevenafraidofrheumatismonthesedampnights，“shesaid，withanothermeaningglanceatme。
　　“Oh!“Ianswered，“themorningsaresohot!“
　　TheDuchesslookeddown。
　　“It’shightimesheweremarried，“saidmyfather，“andithadbetterbebeforeIgo。“
　　“Ifyouwishit，“Ireplieddemurely。
　　Twohourslater，mymotherandI，theDuchessedeMaufrigneuseandMme。d’Espard，wereallfourbloominglikerosesinthefrontofthebox。Ihadseatedmyselfsideways，givingonlyashouldertothehouse，sothatIcouldseeeverything，myselfunseen，inthatspaciousboxwhichfillsoneofthetwoanglesatthebackofthehall，betweenthecolumns。
　　Macumercame，stoodup，andputhisopera-glassesbeforehiseyessothathemightbeabletolookatmecomfortably。
　　InthefirstintervalenteredtheyoungmanwhomIcall“kingoftheprofligates。“TheComteHenrideMarsay，whohasgreatbeautyofaneffeminatekind，enteredtheboxwithanepigraminhiseyes，asmileuponhislips，andanairofsatisfactionoverhiswholecountenance。
　　Hefirstgreetedmymother，Mme。d’Espard，andtheDuchessedeMaufrigneuse，theComted’Esgrignon，andM。deCanalis；thenturningtome，hesaid：
　　“IdonotknowwhetherIshallbethefirsttocongratulateyouonaneventwhichwillmakeyoutheobjectofenvytomany。“
　　“Ah!amarriage!“Icried。“Isitleftforme，agirlfreshfromtheconvent，totellyouthatpredictedmarriagesnevercomeoff。“
　　M。deMarsaybentdown，whisperingtoMacumer，andIwasconvinced，fromthemovementofhislips，thatwhathesaidwasthis：
　　“Baron，youareperhapsinlovewiththatlittlecoquette，whohasusedyouforherownends；butasthequestionisonenotoflove，butofmarriage，itisaswellforyoutoknowwhatisgoingon。“
　　Macumertreatedthisofficiousscandal-mongertooneofthoseglancesofhiswhichseemtomesoeloquentofnoblescorn，andrepliedtotheeffectthathewas“notinlovewithanylittlecoquette。“Hiswholebearingsodelightedme，thatdirectlyIcaughtsightofmyfather，theglovewasoff。
　　Felipehadnotashadowoffearordoubt。Howwelldidhebearoutmyexpectations!Hisfaithisonlyinme，societycannothurthimwithitslies。NotamuscleoftheArab’sfacestirred，notadropofthebluebloodflushedhisolivecheek。
　　Thetwoyoungcountswentout，andIsaid，laughing，toMacumer：
　　“M。deMarsayhasbeentreatingyoutoanepigramonme。“
　　“Hedidmore，“hereplied。“Itwasanepithalamium。“
　　“YouspeakGreektome，“Isaid，rewardinghimwithasmileandacertainlookwhichalwaysembarrasseshim。
　　MyfathermeantimewastalkingtoMme。deMaufrigneuse。
　　“Ishouldthinkso!“heexclaimed。“Thegossipwhichgetsaboutisscandalous。Nosoonerhasagirlcomeoutthaneveryoneiskeentomarryher，andtheridiculousstoriesthatareinvented!IshallneverforceArmandetomarryagainstherwill。Iamgoingtotakeaturninthepromenade，otherwisepeoplewillbesayingthatIallowedtherumortospreadinordertosuggestthemarriagetotheambassador；
　　andCaesar’sdaughteroughttobeabovesuspicion，evenmorethanhiswife——ifthatwerepossible。“
　　TheDuchessedeMaufrigneuseandMme。d’Espardshotglancesfirstatmymother，thenattheBaron，brimmingoverwithslyintelligenceandrepressedcuriosity。Withtheirserpent’scunningtheyhadatlastgotaninklingofsomethinggoingon。Ofallmysteriesinlife，loveistheleastmysterious!Itexhalesfromwomen，Ibelieve，likeaperfume，andshewhocanconcealitisaverymonster!Oureyesprattleevenmorethanourtongues。
　　HavingenjoyedthedelightfulsensationoffindingFeliperisetotheoccasion，asIhadwished，itwasonlyinnatureIshouldhungerformore。SoImadethesignalagreedonfortellinghimthathemightcometomywindowbythedangerousroadyouknowof。AfewhourslaterIfoundhim，uprightasastatue，gluedtothewall，hishandrestingonthebalconyofmywindow，studyingthereflectionsofthelightinmyroom。