"Ah！"
"Iknow。YouthinkthatproveshimthecontraryofwhatI’vesaid。"
"Notatall！"exclaimedtheProphet，withfrenziedcourtesy，"notatall！"
"Yes，youdo。Butyou’rewrong。Hedoesn’texactlyadmiremycharacter，buthelikesmebecauseI’mtall，andhavepleasantcolouredeyes，andthickhair，andwalkwell，andknowthathe’sreallyanunusuallysensibleoldman。"
"Oh，isthatit？"
"Yes。Butnow，ifhecouldbemadetothinkthatIreallyamwhatI
looklike——athoroughlysensibleyoungwoman，hewouldmorethanadmireme，hewouldadoreme。"
"Butifyouwishhimto？"askedtheProphetinblankamazement。
"Ido。"
"Why？"
"TheMissMinervapartofmedesiresit。"
"Indeed。"
"Yes。He’sgottodooneortwothingsforMissMinervawithoutknowingthatI’mMissMinerva。ThatiswhyIboltedintotheparlouryesterday。
JustasIwassteppingintoJellybrand’sIhappenedtoseeSirTiglathandhehappenedtothinkhesawme。"
"Onlytothink？"
"Yes。Heisnotcertain。Isawthatbytheexpressionofhisface。HewaswonderingwhetherIwasme——orisitI？——ornot。Ididn’tgivehimtimetobecertain。Irushedintotheparlour。"
"Youdid。"
"Soit’sallright。FrederickSmithwouldneverbetrayaclient。"
"Really？"
"Never；soI’msaved。ForSirTiglathisn’tcertainevennow。Ifoundthatoutonthewayhomewithhimlastnight。Andanoldmanwho’suncertainofthetruthcansoonbemadecertainofthelie，byayoungwomanheadmires，howeversensibleheis。AndnowI’lltellyoupartofwhatIwantSirTiglathtodoforMissMinerva——"
Butatthismomenttheclockstruckfive，andtheProphetboundedupwithhystericalactivity，andhastilytookhisleave，promisingtocallagainandhearmoreonthefollowingday。
"Andtellmore，"thoughtLadyEnidtoherselfasthedoorofthesensible—lookingboudoirshutbehindhim。
CHAPTERVIII
THEPROPHETRECEIVESHISDIRECTIONSFROMMADAME
WhentheProphetreachedhisdoorherangthebellwitharatherfalteringhand。Mr。Ferdinandappeared。
"Anyonecalled，Mr。Ferdinand？"askedtheProphetwithanattemptatairygaiety。
"Yes，sir，"repliedMr。Ferdinand，lookingratherlikeanelderlymaidenladywhensheunexpectedlyencountershercooktakinganairingwithacorporalintheLifeGuards，"thepairofpersonsyouexpected，sir，hascome。"
TheProphetblushed。
"Oh！You——youhaven’tdisturbedMrs。Merilliawiththem，Ihope，"herejoined。
"No，sir，indeed。Gustavussaidyourorderswasthattheywastobeshownquietlytothelibrary。"
"Exactly。"
"Ibeggedthemtowalka—tiptoe，sir。"
"What？"ejaculatedtheProphet。
"Iinformedthemtherewasillnessinthehouse，sir。"
"Anddidthey——er——？"
"Themalepersongotonhistoesatonce，sir，butthefemalepersonshrieksout，’Isitcatching？Ho！Thinkof——ofCapericornopus，’sir，orsomethingtothateffect。"
"Tch！Tch！"
"Itookthelibertytosay，sir，thatankleswasnotcatching，andthatIwouldcertainlythinkofCapericornopusifshewouldbutwalka—
tiptoe。"
"Well，and——"
"ByhookandcookIgotthemtothelibrary，sir。Butthemaleperson’sbootscreakedawful。Thegettingonhistoes，sirseemedtoinduceit，asyoumightsay。"
"Yes，yes。Sothey’reinthelibrary？"
"Theyare，sir，andhavebeentalkingincessant，sir，eversincetheywasputthere。Wecanheartheirvoicesinourhall，sir。"
Mr。Ferdinandagainpursedhislipsandlookedlikeanelderlylady。
TheProphetcouldnolongermeethiseye。
"Bringsometea，Mr。Ferdinand，quietlytothelibrary。And——andifMrs。MerilliashouldaskformesayI’m——sayI’mbusy——er——writing。"
Mr。Ferdinandmovedastepbackward。
"MasterHennessey！"hecriedinachokedvoice。I，aLondonbutler，andyouaskmeto——！"
"No，no。Ibegyourpardon，Mr。Ferdinand。SimplysayI’mbusy。Thatwillbequitetrue。Ishallbe——verybusy。"
"Yes，sir，"saidMr。Ferdinandwithasternandatlengthsuccessfulefforttoconquerhisoutragedfeelings。
Hewaveredheavilyawaytofetchthetea，whiletheProphet，likeaguiltything，stoletowardsthelibrary。Whenhedrewneartothedoorheheardasomewhatresoundinghubbubofconversationproceedingwithinthechamber。Hedistinguishedtwovoices。OnewasthehollowandsepulchralorganofMalkieltheSecond，theotherwasaheavyandauthoritativecontralto，ofthebuzzingvariety，whichoccasionallygaveanalmostprofessionalclick——suggestingmechanism——asthespeakerpassedfromthelowertotheupperregisterofhervoice。AstheProphetreachedthematoutsidethedoorheheardthecontraltovoicesay，——
"Howarewetoknowitreallyisonlyankles？"
ThevoiceofMalkieltheSecondrepliedplaintively，——
"Butthegentlemanwhoopenedthedoorand——"
Thecontraltovoiceclicked，andpassedtoitsupperregister。
"Youareoverfiftyyearsofage，"itsaidwithdevastatingcompassion，"andyoucanstilltrustagentlemanwhoopensdoors！/Osanctumsimplicitatus！/"
OnhearingthissuddengushofclassicaleruditiontheProphetmusthavebeenseizedbyaparalysingawe，forheremainedasifgluedtothemat，andmadenoefforttoopenthedoorandstepintotheroom。
"IfIamsanctified，Sophronia，"saidthevoiceofMalkiel，"Icannothelpit，indeedIcan’t。Weareasweare。"
"DidBottomsaysoinhisepics？"criedthecontralto，contemptuously。
"DidShakespeareimplythatwhenheinventedhisimmortalBacon，orCarlyle，thegreatCumberlandsage，whenhepennedhisworld—famed’Sartus’？"
"P’r’apsnot，mydear。Youknowbest。Still，ordinarymen——notthatI，ofcourse，canclaimtobeone——mustremain，toacertainextent，whattheyare。"
"ThenwhywasSamuelSmilesborn？"
"What，mylove？"
"Why，Isay？Whereistheuseofeffort？OfwhatbenefitwasPlato’sexistencetotherepublic？OfwhatassistancehasthegreatTracyTupperbeenifmenmuststill，despiteallhisproverbs，remainwhattheyare？/Ocurumhominibus！Oimitatori！Servuspecum！/"
AtthispointthevoiceofMr。FerdinandremarkedinthesmalloftheProphet’sback，——
"ShallIsetdowntheteaonthemat，sir，or——"
TheProphetboundedintothelibrary，tinglingineveryvein。Hispanther—likeentranceevidentlytookthetwoconversationalistsaback，forMalkieltheSecond，whohadbeenplaintivelypromenadingabouttheroom，stillonhistoesaccordingtothebehestofMr。Ferdinand，satdownviolentlyonasmalltableasifhehadbeenshot，whilethecontraltovoice，whichhadbeensittingonasaddle—backchairbythehearth，simultaneouslybouncedup；boththeseproceedingsbeingcarriedoutwiththefranticpromptitudecharacteristicofcompleteandunhesitatingterror。
"Ibegyourpardon！"saidtheProphet。"IhopeIhaven’tdisturbedyou。"
MalkieltheSecondleanedback，thecontraltovoiceleanedforward，andbothbreathedconvulsively。
"Ireallymustapologise，"continuedtheProphet。"IfearIhavestartledyou。"
Hisguestsswallowednothingsimultaneouslyandmechanicallydrewouttheirhandkerchiefs。ThenMalkielfeeblygotupandthecontraltovoicefeeblysankdownagain。
"I——IthoughtIsaidsharp，sir，"remarkedMalkiel，atlength，withagreateffortrecoveringhimself。
"Wasn’tIsharp？"returnedtheProphet。"Willyoupresentme？"
"Areyouequaltoit，mylove？"inquiredMalkiel，tenderly，tothecontraltovoice。
Thecontraltovoicenoddedhysterically。
"MadameSagittarius，sir，"saidMalkiel，turningproudlytotheProphet，"mywife，themotherofCoronaandCapricornus。"
TheProphetbowedandtheladyinclinedherself，slightlyprotrudingherelbowsasshedidso，asifjusttodrawattentiontothefactthatshewaspossessedofthoseappendagesandcouldusethemifnecessary。
MadameMalkiel，orratherMadameSagittarius，asshemustforthepresentbecalled，wasasmallishwomanofsomefortywinters。Herhair，whichwasdrawnawayintellectuallyfromanampleanddecidedlyconvexbrow，wasasblackasapatentleatherboot，andhadaglossuponitasofcarefully—adjustedvarnish。Hereyeswereverylarge，verydarkandveryprominent。Herfeatureswereobstreperousandrippling，runningfromrighttoleft，andherteeth，whichwereshadedbyatinyblackmoustache，gleamedinamannerthatcouldscarcelybecallednatural。Shewasattiredinablackvelvetgowntrimmedwithaverylargequantityofbeadwork，abonnetadornedwithpurplecherries，greentulipsandorange—colouredostrichtips，apelisse，towhichbugleshadbeenappliedwithnouncertainhand，andanopalnecklace。
Hergloveswereofwhite，herbootsofblackkid，thelatterbeingfurnishedwithelasticsides，andoverherleftwristshecarriedaplushreticule，whosemouthwaskeptshutbyatightly—drawnscarletriband。OntheleftsideofherpelissereposedaroundbouquetofvioletsaboutthesizeofaRugbyfootball。
"Ithoughtyoumightliketohavesometea，"begantheProphet，inhismostsoothingmanner，whileMr。Ferdinand，withpursedlips，softlyarrangedthatbeverageupontheseatwhichMr。Sagittarius——sowemustcallhim——hadjustvacated。
"Thankyou，"saidMadameSagittarius，withdignity。"Itwouldbeacceptable。ThelongjourneyfromthebanksoftheMousetothesecentraldistrictsisnotwithoutitsfatigue。Abeautifulequipage！"
"Yousaid——"
"Youhaveaveryfineequipage。"
"Youhaveseenthebrougham？"saidtheProphet，insomesurprise。
"Whatbroom？"buzzedMadameSagittarius。
"Ithoughtyouwereadmiring——"
"Theteaequipage。"
"Oh，yes，tobesure。QueenAnnesilver，yes。"
"Agreatwoman！"saidMadameSagittarius，spreadingasilkhandkerchiefthatexactlymatchedtheostrichtipsinherbonnetcarefullyoverhervelvetlap。"AllwhohavereadMrs。Markham’sworkofgeniuswithunderstandingmustholdhernameinreverence。Anoblecreature！Apityshedied！"
"Agreatpityindeed！"
"Stillwemustrememberthat/Morsomniscommunibus/。Wemustnotforgetthat。"
"No，no。"
"AndafterallitisthewillofProvidence。/MorsDeo/。"
"Quiteso。"
DuringthisclassicalandhistoricalretrospectMr。Ferdinandhadfinishedhistaskandquittedtheapartment。AssoonashehadgoneMadameSagittariuscontinued，——
"AsthemotherofCoronaandCapricornusIfeelitmydutytoaskyou，sir——thatis，Mr。——"
"Vivian。"
"Mr。Vivian，whethertheillnessinyourhouseisreallyonlyanklesasthegentlemanwhoopenedthedoorassuredme？"
"Itisonlythat。"
"Notcatching？"
"Oh，dear，no。"
"There，Sophronia！"saidMr。Sagittarius。"Itoldyouitwasmerelytheprophecy。"
Hesuddenlyassumedaformidablemanner，andcontinued，——
"Andnow，sir，thatwearealone——"
ButMadameinterruptedhim。
"Kindlypermitourhosttosuccourmyfatigue，Jupiter，"shesaidseverely。"Iamgreatlyupsetbythejourney。WhenIamrestoredwecanproceedtobusiness。AtpresentIamfitonlyforconsolation。"
Mr。Sagittariussubsided，andtheProphethastilyassistedthevictimofprolongedtraveltosomebutteredtoast。Havingalsoattendedtothewantsofherprecipitateunderling，hethoughtitagoodopportunitytoproceedtoafullexplanationwiththeaugustcouple，andhethereforeremarked，withaningratiatingandalmosttendersmile，——
"IthinkIoughttotellyouatoncethattherewillbenoneedforanyfurtheranxietyonyourpart。Ihaveputdownmytelescopeandhave——
well，infact，Ihavedecidedonceandforalltogiveupprophecyforthefuture。"
TheProphet，inhisinnocence，hadexpectedthatthisdeclarationofpolicywouldexerciseasoothinginfluenceuponhisguests，moreespeciallywhenheadded——itistobefearedwithsomeinsincerity，——
"IhavecometotheconclusionthatIoverratedmypowers，asamateurswill，youknow，andthatIhaveneverreallypossessedanyspecialtalentinthatdirection。IthinkIshalltakeupgolfinstead，orperhapsthemotorcar。"
Hespokedeliberatelyinalight—minded，evenfrivolous，manner，toyingairilywithasugarbiscuit，asheleanedbackinhischair，whichstoodoppositetoMadameSagittarius’s。Tohisgreatsurprisehiswell—
meaningremarkswerereceivedwitheverysymptomofgravedissatisfactionbyhisillustriouscompanions。MadameSagittariusthrewherselfsuddenlyforwardwithamostvivacioussnort，andherhusband’sfacewasimmediatelyovercastbyathreateninggloomthatseemedtoportendsomeverydisagreeableexpressionofadversehumour。
"Thatwon’tdo，sir，atthistimeofday！"heexclaimed。"Youshouldhavethoughtofthatyesterday。Thatwon’tdoatall，willit，Madame？"
"/Omiserishominorummentas/！"exclaimedthatlady，tragically。"/O
pectoraecaecae/！"
"Youhearher，sir？"continuedMr。Sagittarius。"Yougrasphermeaning？"
"Idohearcertainly，"saidtheProphet，beginningtofeelthathereallymustrubuphisclassics。
"ShehelpsCapricornus，sir，ofanevening。SheassistshiminhisLatin。Madameisaladyofdeepeducation，sir。"
"Quiteso。But——"
"Therecanbenogoingback，sir，"continuedMr。Sagittarius。"Canthere，Madame？"
"Nohumancreaturecangoback，"saidMadameSagittarius。"SuchisthenaturallawasexemplifiedbythegreatCharlesDarwininhis/VegetableMouldandSilkworms/。Nohumancreaturecangoback。Leastofallthisgentleman。Hemustgoforwardandwewithhim。"
TheProphetbegantofeeluncomfortable。
"But——"hesaid。
"Thereisnosuchwordas’but’inmydictionary，"retortedthelady。
"Ah，anabridgededition，nodoubt，"saidtheProphet。"Still——"
"Iambetternow，"interposedMadameSagittarius，brushingsomecrumbsoftoastfromherpelissewiththeorangehandkerchief。"Jupiter，ifyouareready，wecanexplainthetesttothegentleman。"
Sosayingshedrewavinaigrette，setwithfineimitationcarbuncles，fromtheplushreticule，andapplieditmajesticallytohernose。TheProphetgrewreallyperturbed。HerememberedhispromisetohisgrandmotherandSirTiglath，andfeltthathemustasserthimselfmorestrongly。
"Iassureyou，"hebegan，withsomeshowoffirmness，"notestswillbenecessary。Mytelescopehasalreadybeenremovedfromitsposition，and——"
"Thenitmustbereinstated，sir，"saidMr。Sagittarius，"andthisverynight。Madamehashituponaplan，sir，ofsearchingyoutothequick。
Trustawoman，sir，todothat。"
"IshouldnaturallytrustMadameSagittarius，"saidtheProphet，verypolitely。"ButIreallycannot——"
"Soyousay，sir。Ourbusinessistofindoutwhether，livingintheBerkeleySquareasyoudo，youcanbringoffaprophecyofanyimportanceornot。Thefutureofmyself，Madameandfamilydependsupontheresultsoftheexperimentswhichweshallmakeuponyouduringthenextfewdays。"
TheProphetbegantofeelasifhewereshutupalonewithacoupleofdeterminedpractitionersofvivisection。
"Let’ssee，mydear，"continuedMr。Sagittarius，addressinghiswife，"whatwasittobe？"
"Thehonoredgrandmotherone，"repliedthelady，tersely。
TheProphetstarted。
"Icannotpossiblyconsent——"hebegan。
"Pray，Mr。Vivian，listentome，"interposedMadameSagittarius。
"Pray，sir，attendtoMadame！"saidMr。Sagittarius，sternly。
"ButImustreally——"
"January，"saidMadame，"isamonthofgraveimportancetograndmothersthisyear，isitnot，Jupiter？"
"Yes，mydear。InconsequenceofScorpiobeinginthesignofSagittarius。ThecrabwillbeverybusyuptillthethirdofFebruary。"
"Justso。"
"Atwhichdatethelittledog，mylove，assumestherollofmaleficencetowardstheaged。"
"Iknow。/Canecavem/。Whenwastheoldladyborn，Mr。Vivian，ifyouplease？"
"Whatoldlady？"stammeredtheProphet，beginningtoperspire。
"Theoldladywho’sgotankles，yourhonouredgrandmother？"
"Onthetwentiethofthismonth。But——"
"Atwhattime？"
"Sixinthemorning。But——"
"Underwhatstar？"
"Saturn。But——"
"That’slucky，isn’tit，Jupiter？"saidMadame，inanincreasinglybusiness—likemanner。"ThatbringsherintotouchwiththeCamelopard——
doesn’tit？"
"Intoveryclosetouchindeed，mydear，andalsowiththebull。Hegoesrighttoher，asyoumaysay。"
"Icannotconceivablypermit——"begantheProphetinmuchagitation。
ButMadame，withouttakingthesmallestnoticeofhim，proceeded。
"Willthescorpionberoundheronherbirthday？"
"Closeroundher，mylove——withtheserpent。Theyworktogether。"
"Together，dothey？Youknowwhateffectthey’llhaveonher，don’tyou，Jupiter？"
"Ishouldratherthinkso，mydarling，"repliedMr。Sagittarius，withanairofprofoundandsinisterinformation。
TheProphet’sbloodrancoldinhisveins。Yethefeltforthemomentunabletoutterasyllable，oreventomakeagestureofprotest。Soentirelydetachedfromhimdidtheworthycoupleappeartobe，socompletelywrappedupintheirownevidentlywell—consideredandcarefully—laidplans，thathehadasenseofbeinginanothersphere，nottheirs，ofhearingtheirremarksfromsomedistanceoff。MadameSagittariusnowturnedtowardshiminaformalmanner，andcontinued。
"Andnow，Mr。Vivian，Ishallhavetolaydowntheprocedurethatyouwillfollow。Haveyouagoodmemory——no，apencilandnotebookwillbebest。/Litteraescriptusmanetur/，asweallknowfullwell。Haveyouapenciland——？"
TheProphetnoddedmechanically。
"Willyoukindlygetthem？"
TheProphetrose，walkedtohiswritingtableandfeltfortheimplements。
"IfyouwillsitdownnowIwilldirectyou，"continuedMadame，authoritatively。
TheProphetsatdownatthetable，holdingaleadpencilupsidedowninonehandandanaccount—bookwrongsideupintheother。
"Let’ssee——what’sto—day？"inquiredMadame，ofherhusband。
"Theseventeenth，mydear，"repliedMr。Sagittarius，lookingathiswifewithalmostsicklyadoration。
"Tobesure。Capricornus’sdayforHomer’sIdyl。Verywell，Mr。Vivian，to—daybeingtheseventeenth，andtheoldlady’sbirthdaythetwentieth，youhavethreedays，orrathernights，ofsteadyworkbeforeyou。"
"Steadywork？"murmuredtheProphet。
"Whatshouldbehishours，Jupiter？"continuedMadame。"Atwhattimeofnightishetocommence？ShallIsaynine？"
TheProphetrememberedfeeblythat，duringthenextthreenights，hehadtwoimportantdinner—engagements，apartyattheRussianAmbassador’s，andareceptionattheLordChancellor’sjustopposite。
However，hemadenoremark。Somehowhefeltthatwordswereuselesswhenconfrontedwithsuchanironwillasthatoftheladyinthepelisse。
"Ninewouldbetooearly，mydear，"saidMr。Sagittarius。"Elevenp。m。
wouldbemoretothepurpose。"
"Elevenletitbethen，punctually。Willyoudotdown，Mr。Vivian，thatyouhavetobeatthetelescopetotakeobservationsatelevenp。m。
everynightfromnowtillthetwentieth。"
"ButIhavehadthetelesc——"
"Kindlydotitdown。"
TheProphetdotteditdownwiththewrongendofthepencilonthewrongsideoftheaccount—book。
"Andwhatarehishourstobeexactly，Jupiter？"continuedMadame。
"Fromeleventilldawn，Isuppose？"
TheProphetshuddered。
"Eleventillthreewillbesufficient，mylove。Thecrab，youknow，hasprettywelldonehisLondonworkbythattime。Andtheoldladywillhavetodependverymuchonthecrabforthesefewnights。"
AtthispointtheProphet’sbrainbegantoswim。Sparksseemedtofloatbeforehiseyes，andamidthesesparks，nebulousandfragmentaryvisionsappeared，visionsofhisbelovedgrandmothercompanionedbyscorpionsandserpents，inclosetouchwithcamelopardsandbovinemonsters，and，inthelaststressofterroranddismay，leftentirelydependentuponcrustaceansforthathelpandcomfortwhichhithertoherdevotedgrandsonhadeverbeenthankfultoafford。
"Oh，verywell，"repliedMadame。"Youwillbeabletogettobedatthree，Mr。Vivian。Dotthatdown。"
"Thankyou，"murmuredtheProphet，makingaminutepencilscratchinthemidstofabillforbutcher’smeat。
"Duringthesehours——butyoucantellhimtherest，Jupiter。"
Sosaying，andwithanairofoneretiringfrombusinessuponawell—
earnedcompetence，MadameSagittariuslaybackinherchair，settledherbonnet—strings，flickedacrumbfromthefootballofvioletsthatdecoratedherleftside，and，extendingherkidbootstowardsthecheerfulblazethatcamefromthefire，fellwithasighintoacomfortablemeditation。Mr。Sagittarius，ontheotherhand，assumedalookofratherhectoringauthority，andwasabouttoutterwhattheProphethadverylittledoubtwasacommandwhentherecameagentletaptothedoor。
"Comein，"saidtheProphet。
Hethoughthehadspokeninhisordinaryvoice。Inrealityhehadmerelyutteredaverysmallwhisper。Thetapwasrepeated。
"Louder，sir，louder！"saidMr。Sagittarius，encouragingly。
"Comein！"shriekedtheProphet。
Mr。Ferdinandappeared，lookingmoreliketheelderlyspinsterladywhenconfrontedwiththecorporalintheLifeGuardsthanever。
"Ifyouplease，sir，IwastotellyouthatLadyEnidThistleiswithMrs。Merilliatakingtea。Mrs。Merilliathoughtyouwouldwishtoknow。"
MadameSagittariustookthekidbootsfromtheblazeonhearingthisaristocraticname。Mr。Sagittariusassumedalookofreverence，andtheProphetrealised，moreacutelythanever，thatevenwell—bornyoungwomencanbeinquisitive。
"Verywell，"hesaid。"SayI’ll——I’ll"——hesucceededinmakinghisvoicesoundabsolutelyfirm——"I’llcomeinamoment。"
"Yes，sir。"