首页 >出版文学> The Last Days of Pompeiil>第28章
  Lydonsighed,shruggedhisshoulders,andremainedsilent。Meanwhilethecommongazerslistenedwithstaringeyesandlipsapart:thegladiatorswereobjectsofinterestaswellasthebeasts——theywereanimalsofthesamespecies;sothecrowdglancedfromonetotheother——themenandthebrutes——whisperingtheircommentsandanticipatingthemorrow。
  ’Well!’saidLydon,turningaway,’IthankthegodsthatitisnotthelionorthetigerIamtocontendwith;evenyou,Niger,areagentlercombatantthanthey。’
  ’Butequallydangerous,’saidthegladiator,withafiercelaugh;andthebystanders,admiringhisvastlimbsandferociouscountenance,laughedtoo。
  ’Thatasitmaybe,’answeredLydon,carelessly,ashepressedthroughthethrongandquittedtheden。
  ’Imayaswelltakeadvantageofhisshoulders,’thoughttheprudentSosia,hasteningtofollowhim:’thecrowdalwaysgivewaytoagladiator,soI
  willkeepclosebehind,andcomeinforashareofhisconsequence。’
  ThesonofMedonstrodequicklythroughthemob,manyofwhomrecognizedhisfeaturesandprofession。
  ’ThatisyoungLydon,abravefellow:hefightsto—morrow,’saidone。
  ’Ah!Ihaveabetonhim,’saidanother;’seehowfirmlyhewalks!’
  ’Goodlucktothee,Lydon!’saidathird。
  ’Lydon,youhavemywishes,’halfwhisperedafourth,smiling(acomelywomanofthemiddleclass)——’andifyouwin,why,youmayhearmoreofme。’
  ’Ahandsomeman,byVenus!’criedafifth,whowasagirlscarceinherteens。’Thankyou,’returnedSosia,gravelytakingthecomplimenttohimself。
  HoweverstrongthepurermotivesofLydon,andcertainthoughitbethathewouldneverhaveenteredsobloodyacallingbutfromthehopeofobtaininghisfather’sfreedom,hewasnotaltogetherunmovedbythenoticeheexcited。Heforgotthatthevoicesnowraisedincommendationmight,onthemorrow,shoutoverhisdeath—pangs。Bynaturefierceandreckless,aswellasgenerousandwarm—hearted,hewasalreadyimbuedwiththeprideofaprofessionthathefanciedhedisdained,andaffectedbytheinfluenceofacompanionshipthatinrealityheloathed。Hesawhimselfnowamanofimportance;hisstepgrewyetlighter,andhismienmoreelate。
  ’Niger,’saidhe,turningsuddenly,ashehadnowthreadedthecrowd;’wehaveoftenquarrelled;wearenotmatchedagainsteachother,butoneofus,atleast,mayreasonablyexpecttofall——giveusthyhand。’
  ’Mostreadily,’saidSosia,extendinghispalm。
  ’Ha!whatfoolisthis?Why,IthoughtNigerwasatmyheels!’
  ’Iforgivethemistake,’repliedSosia,condescendingly:’don’tmentionit;
  theerrorwaseasy——IandNigeraresomewhatofthesamebuild。’
  ’Ha!ha!thatisexcellent!Nigerwouldhaveslitthythroathadheheardthee!’
  ’Yougentlemenofthearenahaveamostdisagreeablemodeoftalking,’saidSosia;’letuschangetheconversation。’
  ’Vah!vah!’saidLydon,impatiently;’Iaminnohumortoconversewiththee!’
  ’Why,truly,’returnedtheslave,’youmusthaveseriousthoughtsenoughtooccupyyourmind:to—morrowis,Ithink,yourfirstessayinthearena。
  Well,Iamsureyouwilldiebravely!’
  ’Maythywordsfallonthineownhead!’saidLydon,superstitiously,forhebynomeanslikedtheblessingofSosia。’Die!No——Itrustmyhourisnotyetcome。’
  ’Hewhoplaysatdicewithdeathmustexpectthedog’sthrow,’repliedSosia,maliciously。’Butyouareastrongfellow,andIwishyouallimaginableluck;andso,vale!’
  Withthattheslaveturnedonhisheel,andtookhiswayhomeward。
  ’Itrusttherogue’swordsarenotominous,’saidLydon,musingly。’Inmyzealformyfather’sliberty,andmyconfidenceinmyownthewsandsinews,Ihavenotcontemplatedthepossibilityofdeath。Mypoorfather!Iamthyonlyson!——ifIweretofall……’
  Asthethoughtcrossedhim,thegladiatorstrodeonwithamorerapidandrestlesspace,whensuddenly,inanoppositestreet,hebeheldtheveryobjectofhisthoughts。Leaningonhisstick,hisformbentbycareandage,hiseyesdowncast,andhisstepstrembling,thegrey—hairedMedonslowlyapproachedtowardsthegladiator。Lydonpausedamoment:hedivinedatoncethecausethatbroughtforththeoldmanatthatlatehour。
  ’Besure,itisIwhomheseeks,’thoughthe;’heishorrorstruckatthecondemnationofOlinthus——hemorethaneveresteemsthearenacriminalandhateful——hecomesagaintodissuademefromthecontest。Imustshunhim——I
  cannotbrookhisprayers——histears。’
  Thesethoughts,solongtorecite,flashedacrosstheyoungmanlikelightning。Heturnedabruptlyandfledswiftlyinanoppositedirection。
  Hepausednottill,almostspentandbreathless,hefoundhimselfonthesummitofasmallacclivitywhichoverlookedthemostgayandsplendidpartofthatminiaturecity;andastherehepaused,andgazedalongthetranquilstreetsglitteringintheraysofthemoon(whichhadjustarisen,andbroughtpartiallyandpicturesquelyintolightthecrowdaroundtheamphitheatreatadistance,murmuring,andswayingtoandfro),theinfluenceofthesceneaffectedhim,rudeandunimaginativethoughhisnature。Hesathimselfdowntorestuponthestepsofadesertedportico,andfeltthecalmofthehourquietandrestorehim。Oppositeandnearathand,thelightsgleamedfromapalaceinwhichthemasternowheldhisrevels。Thedoorswereopenforcoolness,andthegladiatorbeheldthenumerousandfestivegroupgatheredroundthetablesintheatrium;whilebehindthem,closingthelongvistaoftheilluminedroomsbeyond,thesprayofthedistantfountainsparkledinthemoonbeams。There,thegarlandswreathedaroundthecolumnsofthehall——there,gleamedstillandfrequentthemarblestatue——there,amidstpealsofjocundlaughter,rosethemusicandthelay。
  EPICUREANSONG
  AwaywithyourstoriesofHades,WhichtheFlamenhasforgedtoaffrightus——
  WelaughatyourthreeMaidenLadies,YourFates——andyoursullenCocytus。
  PoorJovehasatroublesomelife,sir,Couldwecredityourtalesofhisportals——
  Inshuttinghisearsonhiswife,sir,Andopeninghiseyesuponmortals。
  Oh,blestbethebrightEpicurus!
  Whotaughtustolaughatsuchfables;
  OnHadestheywantedtomoorus,Andhishandcuttheterriblecables。
  If,then,there’saJoveoraJuno,Theyvexnottheirheadsaboutus,man;
  Besides,iftheydid,Iandyouknow’Tisthelifeofagodtolivethus,man!
  What!thinkyouthegodsplacetheirbliss——eh?——
  Inplayingthespyonasinner?
  Incountingthegirlsthatwekiss,eh?
  Orthecupsthatweemptyatdinner?
  Contentwiththesoftlipsthatloveus,Thismusic,thiswine,andthismirth,boys,Wecarenotforgodsupaboveus——
  Weknowthere’snogodforthisearth,boys!
  WhileLydon’spiety(whichaccommodatingasitmightbe,wasinnoslightdegreedisturbedbytheseverses,whichembodiedthefashionablephilosophyoftheday)slowlyrecovereditselffromtheshockithadreceived,asmallpartyofmen,inplaingarmentsandofthemiddleclass,passedbyhisresting—place。Theywereinearnestconversation,anddidnotseemtonoticeorheedthegladiatorastheymovedon。
  ’Ohorroronhorrors!’saidone;’Olinthusissnatchedfromus!ourrightarmisloppedaway!WhenwillChristdescendtoprotecthisown?’
  ’Canhumanatrocitygofarthersaidanother:’tosentenceaninnocentmantothesamearenaasamurderer!Butletusnotdespair;thethunderofSinaimayyetbeheard,andtheLordpreservehissaint。"Thefoolhathsaidinhisheart,ThereisnoGod。"’
  Atthatmomentoutbrokeagain,fromtheilluminedpalace,theburdenofthereveller’ssong:—
  Wecarenotforgodsupaboveus——
  Weknowthere’snogodforthisearth,boys!
  Erethewordsdiedaway,theNazarenes,movedbysuddenindignation,caughtuptheecho,and,inthewordsofoneoftheirfavoritehymns,shoutedaloud:—
  THEWARNINGHYMNOFTHENAZARENES
  Around——about——forevernearthee,God——OURGOD——shallmarkandhearthee!
  OnhiscarofstormHesweeps!
  Bow,yeheavens,andshrink,yedeeps!
  WoetotheproudoneswhodefyHim!——
  WoetothedreamerswhodenyHim!
  Woetothewicked,woe!
  Theproudstarsshallfail——
  Thesunshallgrowpale——
  Theheavensshriveluplikeascroll——
  Hell’soceanshallbareItsdepthsofdespair,Eachwaveaneternalsoul!
  Fortheonlything,then,ThatshallnotliveagainIsthecorpseofthegiantTIME。
  Hark,thetrumpetofthunder!
  Lo,earthrentasunder!
  And,forth,onHisAngel—throne,Hecomesthroughthegloom,TheJudgeoftheTomb,TosummonandsaveHisown!
  Oh,joytoCare,andwoetoCrime,HecomestosaveHisown!
  WoetotheproudoneswhodefyHim!
  WoetothedreamerswhodenyHim!
  Woetothewicked,woe!
  Asuddensilencefromthestartledhallofrevelsucceededtheseominouswords:theChristiansswepton,andweresoonhiddenfromthesightofthegladiator。Awed,hescarceknewwhy,bythemysticdenunciationsoftheChristians,Lydon,afterashortpause,nowrosetopursuehiswayhomeward。
  Beforehim,howserenelysleptthestarlightonthatlovelycity!howbreathlesslyitspillaredstreetsreposedintheirsecurity!——howsoftlyrippledthedark—greenwavesbeyond!——howcloudlessspread,aloftandblue,thedreamingCampanianskies!YetthiswasthelastnightforthegayPompeii!thecolonyofthehoarChaldean!thefabledcityofHercules!thedelightofthevoluptuousRoman!Ageafteragehadrolled,indestructive,unheeded,overitshead;andnowthelastrayquiveredonthedial—plateofitsdoom!Thegladiatorheardsomelightstepsbehind——agroupoffemaleswerewendinghomewardfromtheirvisittotheamphitheatre。Asheturned,hiseyewasarrestedbyastrangeandsuddenapparition。FromthesummitofVesuvius,darklyvisibleatthedistance,thereshotapale,meteoric,lividlight——ittrembledaninstantandwasgone。Andatthesamemomentthathiseyecaughtit,thevoiceofoneoftheyoungestofthewomenbrokeouthilariouslyandshrill:—
  TRAMP!TRAMP!HOWGAILYTHEYGO!
  HO,HO!FORTHEMORROW’SMERRYSHOW!
  BOOKTHEFIFTH
  ChapterI
  THEDREAMOFARBACES。AVISITORANDAWARNINGTOTHEEGYPTIAN。
  THEawfulnightprecedingthefiercejoyoftheamphitheatrerolleddrearilyaway,andgreylybrokeforththedawnofTHELASTDAYOFPOMPEII!Theairwasuncommonlycalmandsultry——athinanddullmistgatheredoverthevalleysandhollowsofthebroadCampanianfields。Butyetitwasremarkedinsurprisebytheearlyfishermen,that,despitetheexceedingstillnessoftheatmosphere,thewavesoftheseawereagitated,andseemed,asitwere,torundisturbedlybackfromtheshore;whilealongtheblueandstatelySarnus,whoseancientbreadthofchannelthetravelernowvainlyseekstodiscover,therecreptahoarseandsullenmurmur,asitglidedbythelaughingplainsandthegaudyvillasofthewealthycitizens。Clearabovethelowmistrosethetime—worntowersoftheimmemorialtown,thered—tiledroofsofthebrightstreets,thesolemncolumnsofmanytemples,andthestatue—crownedportalsoftheForumandtheArchofTriumph。Farinthedistance,theoutlineofthecirclinghillssoaredabovethevapors,andmingledwiththechangefulhuesofthemorningsky。ThecloudthathadsolongrestedoverthecrestofVesuviushadsuddenlyvanished,anditsruggedandhaughtybrowlookedwithoutafrownoverthebeautifulscenesbelow。
  Despitetheearlinessofthehour,thegatesofthecitywerealreadyopened。Horsemenuponhorsemen,vehicleaftervehicle,pouredrapidlyin;
  andthevoicesofnumerouspedestriangroups,cladinholidayattire,rosehighinjoyousandexcitedmerriment;thestreetswerecrowdedwithcitizensandstrangersfromthepopulousneighborhoodofPompeii;andnoisily——fast——confusedlysweptthemanystreamsoflifetowardsthefatalshow。
  Despitethevastsizeoftheamphitheatre,seeminglysodisproportionedtotheextentofthecity,andformedtoincludenearlythewholepopulationofPompeiiitself,sogreat,onextraordinaryoccasions,wastheconcourseofstrangersfromallpartsofCampania,thatthespacebeforeitwasusuallycrowdedforseveralhoursprevioustothecommencementofthesports,bysuchpersonsaswerenotentitledbytheirranktoappointedandspecialseats。Andtheintensecuriositywhichthetrialandsentenceoftwocriminalssoremarkablehadoccasioned,increasedthecrowdonthisdaytoanextentwhollyunprecedented。
  Whilethecommonpeople,withthelivelyvehemenceoftheirCampanianblood,werethuspushing,scrambling,hurryingon——yet,amidstalltheireagerness,preserving,asisnowthewontwithItaliansinsuchmeetings,awonderfulorderandunquarrelsomegoodhumor,astrangevisitortoArbaceswasthreadingherwaytohissequesteredmansion。Atthesightofherquaintandprimaevalgarb——ofherwildgaitandgestures——thepassengerssheencounteredtouchedeachotherandsmiled;butastheycaughtaglimpseofhercountenance,themirthwashushedatonce,forthefacewasasthefaceofthedead;and,whatwiththeghastlyfeaturesandobsoleterobesofthestranger,itseemedasifonelongentombedhadrisenoncemoreamongsttheliving。Insilenceandaweeachgroupgavewayasshepassedalong,andshesoongainedthebroadporchoftheEgyptian’spalace。
  Theblackporter,liketherestoftheworld,astiratanunusualhour,startedasheopenedthedoortohersummons。
  ThesleepoftheEgyptianhadbeenusuallyprofoundduringthenight;but,asthedawnapproached,itwasdisturbedbystrangeandunquietdreams,whichimpressedhimthemoreastheywerecoloredbythepeculiarphilosophyheembraced。
  Hethoughtthathewastransportedtothebowelsoftheearth,andthathestoodaloneinamightycavernsupportedbyenormouscolumnsofroughandprimaevalrock,lost,astheyascended,inthevastnessofashadowathwartwhoseeternaldarknessnobeamofdayhadeverglanced。Andinthespacebetweenthesecolumnswerehugewheels,thatwhirledroundandroundunceasingly,andwitharushingandroaringnoise。Onlytotherightandleftextremitiesofthecavern,thespacebetweenthepillarswasleftbare,andtheaperturesstretchedawayintogalleries——notwhollydark,butdimlylightedbywanderinganderraticfires,that,meteor—like,nowcrept(asthesnakecreeps)alongtheruggedanddanksoil;andnowleapedfiercelytoandfro,dartingacrossthevastgloominwildgambols——suddenlydisappearing,andassuddenlyburstingintotenfoldbrilliancyandpower。Andwhilehegazedwonderinglyuponthegallerytotheleft,thin,mist—like,aerialshapespassedslowlyup;andwhentheyhadgainedthehalltheyseemedtorisealoft,andtovanish,asthesmokevanishes,inthemeasurelessascent。
  Heturnedinfeartowardstheoppositeextremity——andbehold!therecameswiftly,fromthegloomabove,similarshadows,whichswepthurriedlyalongthegallerytotheright,asifborneinvoluntarilyadownthesidesofsomeinvisiblestream;andthefacesofthesespectresweremoredistinctthanthosethatemergedfromtheoppositepassage;andonsomewasjoy,andonotherssorrow——somewerevividwithexpectationandhope,someunutterablydejectedbyaweandhorror。Andsotheypassed,swiftandconstantlyon,tilltheeyesofthegazergrewdizzyandblindedwiththewhirlofanever—varyingsuccessionofthingsimpelledbyapowerapparentlynottheirown。
  Arbacesturnedaway,and,intherecessofthehall,hesawthemightyformofagiantessseateduponapileofskulls,andherhandswerebusyuponapaleandshadowywoof;andhesawthatthewoofcommunicatedwiththenumberlesswheels,asifitguidedthemachineryoftheirmovements。Hethoughthisfeet,bysomesecretagency,wereimpelledtowardsthefemale,andthathewasborneonwardstillhestoodbeforeher,facetoface。Thecountenanceofthegiantesswassolemnandhushed,andbeautifullyserene。
  Itwasasthefaceofsomecolossalsculptureofhisownancestralsphinx。
  Nopassion——nohumanemotion,disturbeditsbroodingandunwrinkledbrow:
  therewasneithersadness,norjoy,normemory,norhope:itwasfreefromallwithwhichthewildhumanheartcansympathize。Themysteryofmysteriesrestedonitsbeauty——itawed,butterrifiednot:itwastheIncarnationofthesublime。AndArbacesfeltthevoiceleavehislips,withoutanimpulseofhisown;andthevoiceasked:
  ’Whoartthou,andwhatisthytask?’
  ’IamThatwhichthouhastacknowledged,’answered,withoutdesistingfromitswork,themightyphantom。’MynameisNATURE!Thesearethewheelsoftheworld,andmyhandguidesthemforthelifeofallthings。’
  ’Andwhat,’saidthevoiceofArbaces,’arethesegalleries,thatstrangelyandfitfullyillumined,stretchoneitherhandintotheabyssofgloom?’
  ’That,’answeredthegiant—mother,’whichthoubeholdesttotheleft,isthegalleryoftheUnborn。Theshadowsthatflitonwardandupwardintotheworld,arethesoulsthatpassfromthelongeternityofbeingtotheirdestinedpilgrimageonearth。Thatwhichthoubeholdesttothyright,whereintheshadowsdescendingfromabovesweepon,equallyunknownanddim,isthegalleryoftheDead!’
  ’Andwherefore,saidthevoiceofArbaces,’yonwanderinglights,thatsowildlybreakthedarkness;butonlybreak,notreveal?’
  ’Darkfoolofthehumansciences!dreamerofthestars,andwould—bedeciphereroftheheartandoriginofthings!thoselightsarebuttheglimmeringsofsuchknowledgeasisvouchsafedtoNaturetoworkherway,totraceenoughofthepastandfuturetogiveprovidencetoherdesigns。
  judge,then,puppetasthouart,whatlightsarereservedforthee!’
  Arbacesfelthimselftrembleasheaskedagain,’WhereforeamIhere?’
  ’Itistheforecastofthysoul——theprescienceofthyrushingdoom——theshadowofthyfatelengtheningintoeternityasdeclinesfromearth。’
  Erehecouldanswer,ArbacesfeltarushingWINDsweepdownthecavern,asthewindsofagiantgod。Bornealoftfromtheground,andwhirledonhighasaleafinthestormsofautumn,hebeheldhimselfinthemidstoftheSpectresoftheDead,andhurryingwiththemalongthelengthofgloom。Asinvainandimpotentdespairhestruggledagainsttheimpellingpower,hethoughttheWINDgrewintosomethinglikeashape——aspectraloutlineofthewingsandtalonsofaneagle,withlimbsfloatingfarandindistinctlyalongtheair,andeyesthat,aloneclearlyandvividlyseen,glaredstonilyandremorselesslyonhisown。
  ’Whatartthou?’againsaidthevoiceoftheEgyptian。
  ’IamThatwhichthouhastacknowledged’;andthespectrelaughedaloud——’andmynameisNECESSITY。’
  ’Towhatdostthoubearme?’
  ’TotheUnknown。’
  ’Tohappinessortowoe?’
  ’Asthouhastsown,soshaltthoureap。’
  ’Dreadthing,notso!IfthouarttheRulerofLife,thinearemymisdeeds,notmine。’
  ’IambutthebreathofGod!’answeredthemightyWIND。
  ’Thenismywisdomvain!’groanedthedreamer。
  ’Thehusbandmanaccusesnotfate,when,havingsownthistles,hereapsnotcorn。Thouhastsowncrime,accusenotfateifthoureapestnottheharvestofvirtue。’
  Thescenesuddenlychanged。Arbaceswasinaplaceofhumanbones;andlo!
  inthemidstofthemwasaskull,andtheskull,stillretainingitsfleshlesshollows,assumedslowly,andinthemysteriousconfusionofadream,thefaceofApaecides;andforthfromthegrinningjawstherecreptasmallworm,anditcrawledtothefeetofArbaces。Heattemptedtostamponitandcrushit;butitbecamelongerandlargerwiththatattempt。Itswelledandbloatedtillitgrewintoavastserpent:itcoileditselfroundthelimbsofArbaces;itcrunchedhisbones;itraiseditsglaringeyesandpoisonousjawstohisface。Hewrithedinvain;hewithered——hegasped——beneaththeinfluenceoftheblightingbreath——hefelthimselfblastedintodeath。Andthenavoicecamefromthereptile,whichstillborethefaceofApaecidesandranginhisreelingear:
  ’THYVICTIMISTHYJUDGE!THEWORMTHOUWOULDSTCRUSHBECOMESTHESERPENT
  THATDEVOURSTHEE!’
  Withashriekofwrath,andwoe,anddespairingresistance,Arbacesawoke——hishaironend——hisbrowbathedindew——hiseyesglazedandstaring——hismightyframequiveringasaninfant’s,beneaththeagonyofthatdream。Heawoke——hecollectedhimself——heblessedthegodswhomhedisbelieved,thathewasinadream——heturnedhiseyesfromsidetoside——hesawthedawninglightbreakthroughhissmallbutloftywindow——hewasinthePrecinctsofDay——herejoiced——hesmiled;hiseyesfell,andoppositetohimhebeheldtheghastlyfeatures,thelifelesseye,thelividlip——ofthehagofVesuvius!
  ’Ha!’hecried,placinghishandsbeforehiseyes,astoshutoutthegrislyvision,’doIdreamstill?——AmIwiththedead?’
  ’MightyHermes——no!Thouartwithonedeath—like,butnotdead。Recognizethyfriendandslave。’
  Therewasalongsilence。SlowlytheshuddersthatpassedoverthelimbsoftheEgyptianchasedeachotheraway,faintlierandfaintlierdyingtillhewashimselfagain。
  ’Itwasadream,then,’saidhe。’Well——letmedreamnomore,orthedaycannotcompensateforthepangsofnight。Woman,howcamestthouhere,andwherefore?’
  ’Icametowarnthee,’answeredthesepulchralvoiceofthesaga。
  ’Warnme!Thedreamliednot,then?Ofwhatperil?’
  ’Listentome。Someevilhangsoverthisfatedcity。Flywhileitbetime。
  ThouknowestthatIholdmyhomeonthatmountainbeneathwhicholdtraditionsaiththereyetburnthefiresoftheriverofPhlegethon;andinmycavernisavastabyss,andinthatabyssIhaveoflatemarkedaredanddullstreamcreepslowly,slowlyon;andheardmanyandmightysoundshissingandroaringthroughthegloom。Butlastnight,asIlookedthereon,beholdthestreamwasnolongerdull,butintenselyandfiercelyluminous;
  andwhileIgazed,thebeastthatlivethwithme,andwascoweringbymyside,utteredashrillhowl,andfelldownanddied,andtheslaverandfrothwereroundhislips。Icreptbacktomylair;butIdistinctlyheard,allthenight,therockshakeandtremble;and,thoughtheairwasheavyandstill,therewerethehissingofpentwinds,andthegrindingasofwheels,beneaththeground。So,whenIrosethismorningattheverybirthofdawn,Ilookedagaindowntheabyss,andIsawvastfragmentsofstoneborneblackandfloatinglyovertheluridstream;andthestreamitselfwasbroader,fiercer,redderthanthenightbefore。ThenIwentforth,andascendedtothesummitoftherock:andinthatsummitthereappearedasuddenandvasthollow,whichIhadneverperceivedbefore,fromwhichcurledadim,faintsmoke;andthevaporwasdeathly,andIgasped,andsickened,andnearlydied。Ireturnedhome。Itookmygoldandmydrugs,andleftthehabitationofmanyyears;forIrememberedthedark