首页 >出版文学> The Last Chronicle of Barset>第31章
  Butitwasluncheontime,andnotonlyhadhenotasyetsaidawordofallthatwhichhehadcometosay,buthadnotasyetmadeanymovetowardsgettingitsaid。HowwashetoarrangethatLilyshouldbeleftalonewithhim?LadyJuliahadsaidthatsheshouldnotexpecthimbacktilldinner—time,andhehadansweredherlackadaisically,’Idon’tsupposeIshallbethereabovetenminutes。TheminuteswillsayallI’vegottosay,anddoallI’vegottodo。AndthenIsupposeIshallgoandcutnamesaboutbridges——eh,LadyJulia?’LadyJuliaunderstoodthewords;foronce,uponaformeroccasion,shehadfoundhimcuttingLily’snameontherailofawoodenbridgeinherbrother’sgrounds。ButhehadnowbeenacoupleofhoursattheSmallHouse,andhadnotsaidawordofthatwhichhehadcometosay。
  ’Areyougoingtowalkoutwithusafterlunch?’saidLily。
  ’Hewillhavehadwalkingenough,’saidMrsDale。
  ’We’llconvoyhimpartoftheway,’saidLily。
  ’I’mnotgoingyet,’saidJohnny,’unlessyouturnmeout。’
  ’Butwemusthaveourwalkbeforeitisdark,’saidLily。
  ’Youmightgoupwithhimtoyouruncle,’saidMrsDale。’Indeed,I
  promisedtogouptheremyself,andsodidyou,Grace,toseethemicroscope。IheardMrDalegiveordersthatoneofthoselong—leggedreptilesshouldbecaughtonpurposeforyourinspection。’
  MrsDale’slittleschemeforbringingthetwotogetherwasverytransparent,butitwasnotthelesswiseonthataccount。Schemeswilloftenbesuccessful,letthembeeversotransparent。Littleintriguesbecomenecessary,nottoconquerunwillingpeople,butpeoplewhoarewillingenough,who,nevertheless,cannotgivewayexceptunderthemachinationsofanintrigue。
  ’Idon’tthinkImindlookingatthelong—leggedcreature,today,’saidJohnny。
  ’Imustgoofcourse,’saidGrace。
  Lilysaidnothingatthemoment,eitheraboutthelong—leggedcreatureorthewalk。Thatwhichmustbe,mustbe。SheknewwellwhyJohnEameshadcomethere。SheknewthatthevisitstohismotherandtoLadyJuliawouldneverhavebeenmade,butthathemighthavethisinterview。Andhehadarighttodemand,atanyrate,asmuchasthat。Thatwhichmustbe,mustbe。AndthereforewhenbothMrsDaleandGracestoutlymaintainedtheirpurposeofgoinguptothesquire,LilyneitherattemptedtopersuadeJohntoaccompanythemnorsaidthatshewoulddosoherself。
  ’Iwillconvoyyouhomemyself,’shesaid,’andGrace,whenshehasdonewiththebeetle,shallcomeandmeetme。Won’tyou,Grace?’
  ’Certainly。’
  ’Wearenothelplessyoungladiesintheseparts,noryettimorous,’
  continuedLily。’Wecanwalkaboutwithoutbeingafraidofghosts,robbers,wildbulls,youngmen,orgypsies。Comethefieldpath,Grace。
  Iwillgoasfarasthebigoakwithhim,andthenIshallturnback,andIshallcomeinbythestileoppositethechurchgate,andthroughthegarden。Soyoucan’tmissme。’
  ’Idaresayhe’llcomebackwithyou,’saidGrace。
  ’No,hewon’t。Hewilldonothingofthekind。He’llhavetogoonandopenLadyJulia’sbottleofportwineforhisowndrinking。’
  AllthiswasverygoodonLily’spart,andverygoodalsoonthepartofMrsDale;andJohnwasofcourseverymuchobligedtothem。Buttherewasalackofromanceinitall,whichdidnotseemtohimtoarguewellastohissuccess。Hedidnotthinkmuchaboutit,buthefeltthatLilywouldnothavebeensoreadytoarrangetheirwalkhadsheintendedtoyieldtohisentreaty。Nodoubtintheselatterdaysplaingoodsensehadbecometheprevailingmarkofhercharacter——perhaps,asJohnnythought,alittletoostronglyprevailing;butevenwithallherplaingoodsenseanddeterminationtodispensewiththeabsurditiesofromanceintheaffairsofherlife,shewouldnothaveproposedherselfashiscompanionforawalkacrossthefieldsmerelythatshemighthaveanopportunityofacceptinghishand。Hedidnotsayallthistohimself,butheinstinctivelyfeltthatitwasso。Andhefeltalsothatitshouldhavebeenhisdutytoarrangethewalk,ortheproperopportunityforthescenethatwastocome。Shehaddoneitinstead——sheandhermotherbetweenthem,therebyforcinguponhimapainfulconvictionthathehimselfhadnotbeenequaltotheoccasion。’Ialwaysmakeamullofit,’hesaidtohimself,whenthegirlswentuptogettheirhats。
  Theywentdowntogetherthroughthegarden,andpartedwherethepathsledaway,onetothegreathouseandtheothertowardsthechurch。’I’llcertainlycomeandcalluponthesquirebeforeIgobacktoLondon,’
  saidJohnny。
  We’lltellhimso,’saidMrsDale。’Hewouldbesuretohearthatyouhadbeenwithus,evenifwesaidnothingaboutit。’
  ’Ofcoursehewould,’saidLily;’Hopkinshasseenhim。’Thentheyseparated,andLilyandJohnEamesweretogether。
  Hardlyawordwassaid,perhapsnotaword,tilltheyhadcrossedtheroadandgotintothefieldoppositetothechurch。Andinthisfirstfieldtherewasmorethanonepath,andthechildrenofthevillagewereoftenthere,andithadaboutitsomethingofapublicnature。JohnEamesfeltthatitwasbynomeansafittingfieldtosaythatwhichhehadtosay。Incrossingit,therefore,hemerelyremarkedthatthedaywasveryfineforwalking。Thenheaddedonespecialword,’Anditissogoodofyou,Lily,tocomewithme。’
  ’Iamverygladtocomewithyou。Iwoulddomorethanthat,John,toshowhowgladIamtoseeyou。’Thentheyhadcometothesecondlittlegate,andbeyondthatthefieldswerereallyfields,andtherewerestilesinsteadofwicket—gates,andthebusinessofthedaymustbebegun。
  ’Lily,wheneverIcomehereyousaythatyouaregladtoseeme?’
  ’AndsoIam——veryglad。Onlyyouwouldtakeitasmeaningwhatitdoesnotmean,Iwouldtellyou,thatofallmyfriendslivingawayfromthereachofmydailylife,youaretheonewhosecomingiseverthemostpleasanttome。’
  ’Oh,Lily!’
  ’Itwas,Ithink,onlyyesterdaythatIwastellingGracethatyouaremorelikeabrothertomethananyoneelse。Iwishitmightbeso。I
  whichwemightsweartobebrotherandsister。I’ddomoreforyouthenthanwalkacrossthefieldswithyoutoGuestwickCottage。YourprosperitywouldthenbethethingintheworldforwhichIshouldbemostanxious。Andifyoushouldmarry——’
  ’Itcanneverbelikethatbetweenus,’saidJohnny。
  ’Canitnot?Ithinkitcan。Perhapsnotthisyear,ornextyear;
  perhapsnotinthenextfiveyears。ButImakemyselfhappywiththinkingthatitmaybesosomeday。Ishallwaitforitpatiently,verypatiently,eventhoughyoushouldrebuffmeagainandagain——asyouhavedonenow。’
  ’Ihavenotrebuffedyou。’
  ’Notmaliciously,orinjuriously,oroffensively。Iwillbeverypatientandtakelittlerebuffswithoutcomplaining。Thisistheworstofitall。WhenGraceandIaretogetherwecannevermanageitwithouttearingourselvesalltopieces。Itismuchnicertohaveyoutohelpme。’
  ’Letmehelpyoualways,’hesaid,keepingherhandsinhisafterhehadaidedhertojumpfromthestiletotheground。
  ’Yes,asmybrother。’
  ’Thatisnonsense,Lily。’
  ’Isitnonsense?Nonsenseisahardword。’
  ’Itisnonsenseascomingfromyoutome。Lily,IsometimesthinkthatIampersecutingyou,writingtoyou,comingafteryou,asIamdoingnow——tellingthesamewhiningstory——asking,asking,andaskingforthatwhichyousayyouwillnevergiveme。AndthenIfeelashamedofmyself,andswearthatIwilldoitnomore。’
  ’Donotbeashamedofyourself;butyetdoitnomore。’
  ’Andthen,’hecontinued,withoutmindingherwords,’atothertimesI
  feelthatitmustbemyownfault;thatifIonlyperseveredwithsufficientenergy,Imustbesuccessful。AtsuchtimesIswearIwillnevergiveitup。’
  ’Oh,John,ifyoucouldonlyknowhowlittleworthyofsuchpursuititis。’
  ’Leavemetobethejudgeofthat,dear。Whenamanhastakenamonth,orperhapsonlyaweek,orperhapsnotmorethanhalf—an—hour,tomakeuphismind,itmaybeverywelltotellhimthathedoesn’tknowwhatheisabout。I’vebeenintheofficenowforoversevenyears,andthefirstdayIwentIputanoathintoabookthatIwouldcomebackandgetyouformywifewhenIhadgotenoughtoliveupon。’
  ’Didyou,John?’
  ’Yes。Icanshowittoyou。Iusedtocomeandhoverabouttheplaceintheolddays,beforeIwentuptoLondon,whenIwassuchafoolthatIcouldn’tspeaktoyouifImetyou。Iamspeakingofatimelongbefore——beforethatmancamedownhere。’
  ’Donotspeakofhim,John。’
  ’Imustspeakofhim。Amanisn’ttoholdhistonguewheneverythinghehasintheworldisatstake。Isupposehelovedyouafterafashion,once。’
  ’Pray,pray,donotspeakillofhim,John。’
  ’Iamnotgoingtoabusehim。Youcanjudgeofhimbyhisdeeds。I
  cannotsayanythingworseofhimthanwhattheysay。Isupposehelovedyou;buthecertainlydidnotloveyouasIhavedone。Ihaveatanyratebeentruetoyou。Yes,Lily,Ihavebeentruetoyou。Iamtruetoyou。Hedidnotknowwhathewasabout。Ido。IamjustifiedinsayingthatIdo。Iwantyoutobemywife。ItisnouseyourtalkingaboutitasthoughIonlyhalfwantedit。’
  ’Ididnotsaythat。’
  ’Isnotamantohaveanyreward?Ofcourseifyouhadmarriedhimtherewouldhavebeenanendofit。Hehadcomeinbetweenmeandmyhappiness,andImusthaveborneit,asothermenbearsuchsorrows。Butyouhavenotmarriedhim;and,ofcourse,IcannotbutfeelthatImayyethaveachance。Lily,answermethis。DoyoubelievethatIloveyou?’Butshedidnotanswerhim。’Youcanatanyratetellmethat。DoyouthinkthatIaminearnest?’
  ’Yes,Ithinkyouareinearnest。’
  ’AnddoyoubelievethatIloveyouwithallmyheartandallmystrengthandallmysoul?’
  ’Oh,John!’
  ’Butdoyou?’
  ’Ithinkyouloveme。’
  ’Think!WhatamItosayortodotomakeyouunderstandthatmyonlyideaofhappinessistheideathatsoonerorlaterImaygetyoutobemywife?Lily,willyousaythatitshallbeso?Speak,Lily。Thereisnoonethatwillnotbeglad。Yourunclewillconsent——hasconsented。
  Yourmotherwishesit。Bellwishesit。Mymotherwishesit。LadyJuliawishesit。Youwouldbedoingwhateverybodyaroundyouwantsyoutodo。
  Andwhyshouldyounotdoit?Itisn’tthatyoudislikeme。Youwouldn’ttalkaboutbeingmysister,ifyouhadnotsomesortofregardforme。’
  ’Ihavearegardforyou。’
  ’Thenwhywillyounotbemywife?Oh,Lily,saythewordnow,here,atonce。Saytheword,andyou’llmakemethehappiestfellowinallEngland。’Ashespokehetookherbybotharms,andheldherfast。Shedidnotstruggletogetawayfromhim,butstoodquitestill,lookingintohisface,whilethefirstsparkleofasalttearformeditselfineacheye。’Lily,onelittlewordwilldoit——halfaword,anod,asmile。JusttouchmyarmwithyourhandandIwilltakeitforayes。’I
  thinkthatshealmosttriedtotouchhim;thatthewordwasinherthroat,andthatshealmoststrovetospeakit。Buttherewasnosyllablespoken,andherfingersdidnotloosethemselvestofalluponhissleeve。’Lily,Lily,whatcanIsaytoyou?’
  ’IwishIcould,’shewhispered;——butthewhisperwassohoarsethathehardlyrecognizedthevoice。
  ’Andwhycanyounot?Whatistheretohinderyou?Thereisnothingtohinderyou,Lily。’
  ’Yes,John;thereisthatwhichmusthinderme。’
  ’Andwhatisit?’
  ’Iwilltellyou。Youaresogoodandsotrue,andsoexcellent——suchadear,dearfriend,thatIwilltellyoueverything,sothatyoumayreadmyheart。IwilltellyouasItellmamma——youandherandnooneelse;——foryouarethechoicefriendofmyheart。IcannotbeyourwifebecauseoftheloveIbearforanotherman。’
  ’Andthatmanishe——hewhocamehere?’
  ’Ofcourseitishe。Ithink,Johnny,youandIarealikeinthis,thatwhenwehaveloved,wecannotbringourselvestochange。Youwillnotchange,thoughitwouldbesomuchbetteryoushoulddoso。’
  ’No;Iwillneverchange。’
  ’NorcanI。WhenIsleepIdreamofhim。WhenIamaloneIcannotbanishhimfrommythoughts。Icannotdefinewhatitistolovehim。I
  wantnothingfromhim——nothing,nothing。ButImoveaboutthroughmylittleworldthinkingofhim,andIshalldosotilltheend。Iusedtofeelproudofmylove,thoughitmademesowretchedthatIthoughtitwouldkillme。Iamnotproudofitanylonger。Itisafoolishpoor—spiritedweakness——asthoughmyhearthasbeenonlyhalfformedinthemaking。Doyoubestronger,John。Amanshouldbestrongerthanawoman。’
  ’Ihavenoneofthatsortofstrength。’
  ’NorhaveI。Whatcanwedobutpityeachother,andswearthatwewillbefriends——dearfriends。Thereistheoak—treeandIhavegottoturnback。Wehavesaideverythingthatwecansay——unlessyouwilltellmethatyouwillbemybrother。’
  ’No;Iwillnottellyouthat。’
  ’Good—bye,then,Johnny。’
  Hepaused,holdingherbythehandandthinkingofanotherquestionwhichhelongedtoputtoher——consideringwhetherhewouldaskherthatquestionornot。Hehardlyknewwhetherhewereentitledtoaskit;——whetherornotheaskingofitwouldbeungenerous。Shehadsaidthatshewouldtellhimeverything——asshehadtoldeverythingtohermother。’Ofcourse,’hesaid,’Ihavenorighttoexpecttoknowanythingofyourfutureintentions。’
  ’Youmayknowthemall——asfarasIknowthemmyself。Ihavesaidthatyoushouldreadmyheart。’
  ’Ifthisman,whosenameIcannotbeartomention,shouldcomeagain——’
  ’Ifheweretocomeagainhewouldcomeinvain,John。’Shedidnotsaythathehadcomeagain。Shecouldtellherownsecret,butnotthatofanotherperson。
  ’Youwouldnotmarryhim,nowthatheisfree?’
  Shestoodandthoughtforawhilebeforesheansweredhim。’No,I
  shouldnotmarryhimnow。Ithinknot。’Thenshepausedagain。’Nay,I
  amsureIwouldnot。Afterwhathaspassed,Icouldnottrustmyselftodoit。Thereismyhandonit。Iwillnot。’
  ’No,Lily,Idonotwantthat。’
  ’ButIinsist。IwillnotmarryMrCrosbie。Butyoumustnotmisunderstandme,John。There;——allthatisoverformenow。Allthosedreamsaboutlove,andmarriage,andofahouseofmyown,andchildren——andacrosshusband,andawedding—ringgrowingalwaystighterasIgrowfatandolder。Ihavedreamedofsuchthingsasothergirlsdo——moreperhapsthanothergirls,morethanIshouldhavedone。AndnowIacceptthethingasfinished。Youwrotesomethinginyourbook,youdearJohn——somethingthatcouldnotbemadetocometrue。DearJohn,I
  wishforyoursakeitwasotherwise。IwillgohomeandIwillwriteinmybook,thisveryday,LilyDale,OldMaid。IfeverImakethatfalse,doyoucomeandaskmeforthepage。’
  ’LetitremaintheretillIamallowedtotearitforyou。’
  ’Iwillwriteit,anditshallneverbetornout。YouIcannotmarry。
  HimIwillnotmarry。Youmaybelieveme,Johnny,whenIsaytherecanneverbeathird。’
  ’Andisthattobetheendofit?’
  ’Yes;——thatistobetheendofit。Nottheendofourfriendship。Oldmaidshavefriends。’
  ’Itshallnotbetheendofit。Thereshallbenoendofitwithme。’
  ’But,John——’
  ’DonotsupposethatIwilltroubleyouagain——atanyratenotforawhile。Infiveyearsperhaps——’
  ’Now,Johnny,youarelaughingatme。Andofcourseitisthebestway。
  IfthereisnotGrace,andshehascaughtmebeforeIhaveturnedback。
  Good—bye,dearJohn。Godblessyou。Ithinkyouthefinestfellowintheworld。Ido,anddodoesmamma。RememberalwaysthatthereisatempleatAllingtoninwhichyourworshipisneverforgotten。’ThenshepressedhishandandturnedawayfromhimtomeetGraceCrawley。Johndidnotstoptospeakawordtohiscousin,butpursuedhiswayalone。
  ’Thatcousinofyours,’saidLily,’issimplythedearest,warmest—hearted,finestcreaturethateverwasseenintheshapeofaman。’
  ’Haveyoutoldhimthatyouthinkhimso?’saidGrace。
  ’Indeed,Ihave,’saidLily。
  ’Buthaveyoutoldthisfinest,warmest,dearestcreaturethatheshallberewardedwiththeprizehecovets?’
  ’No,Grace。Ihavetoldhimnothingofthekind。Ithinkheunderstandsitallnow。Ifhedoesnot,itisnotforthewantofmytellinghim。Idon’tsupposeanyladywasevermoreopen—spokentoagentlemanthatIhavebeentohim。’
  ’Andwhyhaveyousenthimawaydisappointed?Youknowyoulovehim。’
  ’Yousee,mydear,’saidLily,’youallowyourself,forthesakeofyourargument,touseawordinadoublesense,andyouattempttoconfoundmebydoingso。ButIamagreatdealtoocleverforyou,andhavethoughttoomuchaboutit,tobetakenininthatway。IcertainlyloveyourcousinJohn;andsodoIloveMrBoyce,thevicar。’
  ’YouloveJohnnymuchbetterthanyoudoMrBoyce。’
  ’True;verymuchbetter;butitisofthesamesortoflove。However,itisagreatdealtoodeepforyoutounderstand。You’retooyoung,andI
  shan’ttrytoexplainit。Butthelongandtheshortofitis——Iamnotgoingtomarryyourcousin。’
  ’Iwishyouwere,’saidGrace,’withallmyheart。’
  JohnEamesashereturnedtothecottagewasbynomeansabletofallbackuponthoseresolutionsastohisfuturelife,whichhehadformedforhimselfandcommunicatedtohisfriendDalrymple,andwhichhehadintendedtobringatonceintoforceintheeventofhisbeingrejectedbyLilyDale。’Iwillcleansemymindofitaltogether,’hehadsaid,’andthoughImaynotforgether,Iwillliveasthoughshewereforgotten。Ifshedeclinesmyproposalagain,Iwillacceptherwordasfinal。Iwillnotgoabouttheworldanylongerasastrickendeer——tobepitiedorelsebulliedbytherestoftheherd。’OnhiswaydowntoGuestwickhehadsworntwentytimesthatitshouldbeso。Hewouldmakeonemoreeffort,andthenhewouldgiveitup。Butnow,afterhisinterviewwithLily,hewasaslittledisposedtogiveitupasever。
  HesatuponagateinapaddockthroughwhichtherewasabackentranceintoLadyJulia’sgarden,andtheresworeathousandoathsthathewouldnevergiveherup。Hewas,atanyrate,surethatshewouldneverbecomethewifeofanyoneelse。Hewasequallysurethathewouldneverbecomethehusbandofanyotherwife。Hecouldtrusther。Yes;hewassureofthat。Butcouldhetrusthimself?Communingwithhimself,hetoldhimselfthatafterallhewasbutapoorcreature。Circumstanceshadbeenverygoodtohim,buthehaddonenothingforhimself。Hewasvain,andfoolish,andunsteady。Sohetoldhimselfwhilesittinguponthegate。Buthehad,atanyrate,beenconstanttoLily,andconstanthewouldremain。
  Hewouldnevermorementionhernametoanyone——unlessitweretoLadyJuliatonight。ToDalrymplehewouldnotopenhismouthabouther,butwouldplainlyaskhisfriendtobesilentonthatsubjectifhernameshouldbementionedbyhim。Butmorningandeveninghewouldprayforher,andinhisprayershewouldalwaysthinkofherashiswife。HewouldneverspeaktoanothergirlwithoutrememberingthathewasboundtoLily。Hewouldgonowhereintosocietywithoutrecallingtomindthefactthathewasboundbythechainsofasolemnengagement。IfheknewhimselfhewouldbeconstanttoLily。
  Andthenheconsideredinwhatmanneritwouldbebestandmostbecomingthatheshouldstillprosecutehisendeavourandrepeathisoffer。Hethoughtthathewouldwritetohereveryyear,onthesamedayoftheyear,yearafteryear,itmightbeforthenexttwentyyears。Andhisletterswouldbeverysimple。Sittingthereonthegateheplannedthewordingofhisletters;——ofhisfirstletter,andofhissecond,andofhisthird。Theyshouldbeveryliketoeachother——shouldhardlybemorethanarepetitionofthesamewords。’Ifnowyouarereadyforme,thenLily,amI,asever,stillreadyforyou。’Andthen,’ifnow’againandagain,’ifnow;——andstill’ifnow’。Whenhishairshouldbegrey,andthewrinklesonhischeeks——ay,thoughtheyshouldbeonhers,hewouldstillcontinuetotellherfromyeartoyearthathewasreadytotakeher。Surelysomedaythat’ifnow’wouldprevail。Andshoulditneverprevail,themeritofhisconstancyshouldbeitsownreward。
  Suchlettersasthoseshewouldsurelykeep。Thenhelookedforward,downintothevalleyofcomingyears,andfanciedherasshemightsitreadingtheminthetwilightofsomelongevening——letterswhichhadbeenwrittenallinvain。Hethoughtthathecouldlookforwardwithsomesatisfactiontowardsthecloseofhisowncareer,inhavingbeentheheroofsuchalove—story。Atanyrate,ifsuchastoryweretobehisstory,themelancholyattachedtoitshouldarisefromnofaultofhisown。Hewouldstillpresshertobehiswife。Andthenasherememberedthathewasonlytwenty—sevenandthatshewastwenty—four,hebegantomarvelatthefeelingofgreyoldagewhichhadcomeuponhim,andtriedtomakehimselfbelievethathewouldhaveheryetbeforethebloomwasoffhercheeks。
  HewentintothecottageandmadehiswayatonceintotheroominwhichLadyJuliawassitting。Shedidnotspeakatfirst,butlookedanxiouslyabouthisface。Andhedidnotspeak,butturnedtoatablenearthewindowandtookupabook——thoughtheroomwastoodarkforhimtoseetoreadthewords。’John,’atlastsaidLadyJulia。
  ’Well,mylady?’
  ’Haveyounothingtotellme,John?’
  ’Nothingonearth——exceptthesameoldstory,whichhasnowbecomeamatterofcourse。’
  ’But,John,willyounottellmewhatshesaid?’
  ’LadyJulia,shehassaidno;simplyno。Itisaveryeasywordtosay,andshehassaiditsooftenthatitseemstocomefromherquitenaturally。’Thenhegotacandleandsatdownoverthefirewithavolumeofanovel。Itwasnotyetpastfive,andLadyJuliadidnotgoupstairstodresstillsix,andthereforetherewasanhourduringwhichtheyweretogether。Johnhadatfirstbeenrathergrandtohisoldfriend,andveryuncommunicative。Butbeforethedressing—bellhadrunghehadbeencoaxedintoaconfidentialstrainandhadtoldeverything。
  ’Isupposeitiswrongandselfish,’hesaid。’IsupposeIamadoginamanger。ButIdoownthatthereisaconsolationtomeintheassurancethatshewillneverbethewifeofthatscoundrel。’
  ’Icouldneverforgiveherifsheweretomarryhimnow,’saidLadyJulia。
  ’Icouldneverforgivehim。Butshehassaidthatshewillnot,andI
  knowthatshewillnotforswearherself。Ishallgoonwithit,LadyJulia。Ihavemadeupmymindtothat。Isupposeitwillnevercometoanything,butIshallsticktoit。Icanliveanoldbacheloraswellasanotherman。AtanyrateIshallsticktoit。’Thenthegoodsillyoldwomancomfortedhimandapplaudedhimasthoughhewereaheroamongmen,anddidrewardhim,asLilyhadpredicted,byoneofthosenowrarebottlesofsuper—excellentportwhichhadcometoherfromherbrother’scellar。
  JohnEamesstayedouthistimeatthecottage,andwentovermorethanonceagaintoAllington,andcalledonthesquire,ononeoccasiondiningwithhimandmeetingthethreeladiesfromtheSmallHouse;andhewalkedwiththegirls,comportinghimselflikeanyordinaryman。ButhewasnotagainalonewithLilyDale,nordidhelearnwhethershehadintruthwrittenthosetwowordsinherbook。Butthereadermaybeknowthatshedidwritethemthereontheeveningofthedayonwhichthepromisewasmade。’LilianDale——OldMaid’。
  AndwhenJohn’sholidaywasover,hereturnedtohisdutiesattheelbowofSirRaffleBuffle。