And,indeed,shewassadlychanged!Herfeatureshadbecomesharper,andthefirmlinesabouthermouthexpressedseverity,almoststernness。Herclearblueeyesseemedtohavegrownlarger,andtheirglancebetrayedsecret,ever—watchfulcare。Onlyheryellowhairhadresistedtheforceoftimeandsorrow;foritstillfellinrichandwavyfoldsoverasmoothwhiteforehead。Shewas,indeed,halfashamedofit,andoftentookpainstoforceitintoasober,matronlyhood。Onlyatnights,whenshesatalonetalkingwithherboy,shewouldallowittoescapefromitsprison;andhewouldlaughandplaywithit,andinhischild’swayevenwonderatthecontrastbetweenhersternfaceandheryouthfulmaidenlytresses。
ThisThomas,herson,wasastrangechild。
HehadaNorseman’stasteforthefabulousandfantastic,andalthoughheneverheardataleofNeckenortheHulder,hewouldoftenstartlehismotherbythemostfancifulcombinationsofimaginedevents,andbybolderpersonificationsthaneversprungfromthelegendarysoiloftheNorseland。Shealwaystookcaretocheckhimwheneverheindulgedintheseimaginaryflights,andheatlastcametolookuponthemassomethingwrongandsinful。Theboy,ashegrewup,oftenstrikinglyremindedherofherfather,as,indeed,heseemedtohaveinheritedmorefromherownthanfromHalvard’srace。Onlythebrightflaxenhairandhissquare,somewhatclumsystaturemighthavetoldhimtobethelatter’schild。Hehadahottemper,andoftendistressedhismotherbyhisstubbornness;
andthentherewouldcomeagreatburstofrepentanceafterwards,whichdistressedherstillmore。Forshewasafraiditmightbeasignofweakness。"Andstronghemustbe,"
saidshetoherself,"strongenoughtoovercomeallresistance,andtoconqueragreatnameforhimself,strongenoughtoblessamotherwhobroughthimintotheworldnameless。"
Strangetosay,muchasshelovedthischild,sheseldomcaressedhim。Itwasapenanceshehadimposeduponherselftoatoneforherguilt。
Onlyattimes,whenshehadbeensittinguplate,andhereyeswouldfall,asitwere,byaccidentuponthelittlefaceonthepillow,withthesweetunconsciousnessofsleeprestinguponitlikeasoft,invisibleveil,wouldshesuddenlythrowherselfdownoverhim,kisshim,andwhispertendernamesinhisear,whilehertearsfellhotandfastonhisyellowhairandhisrosycountenance。Thenthechildwoulddreamthathewassailingaloftovershiningforests,andthathismother,beamingwithallthebeautyofherlostyouth,flewbeforehim,showeringgoldenflowersonhispath。ThesewerethehappiestmomentsofBrita’sjoylesslife,andeventhesewerenotunmixedwithbitterness;
forintothemidstofherjoywouldstealashyanxiousthoughtwhichwasthemoreterriblebecauseitcamesostealthily,sosoft—footedandunbidden。Hadnotthischildbeengivenherasapunishmentforherguilt?HadshethenarighttoturnGod’sscourgeintoablessing?
DidshegivetoGod"thatwhichbelongethuntoGod,"aslongasallherhopes,herthoughts,andherwholebeingrevolvedaboutthisoneearthlything,herson,thechildofhersorrow?
Shewasnotanaturetoshrinkfromgravequestions;
no,shemetthemboldly,whenoncetheywerethere,wrestledfiercelywiththem,wasdefeated,andagainwithamartyr’szealrosetorenewthecombat。GodhadHimselfsentherthisperplexingdoubtanditwasherdutytobearHisburden。ThusranBrita’sreasoning。
Inthemeanwhiletheyearsslippedby,andgreatchangeswerewroughtintheworldabouther。
ThefewhundreddollarswhichBritahadbeenabletosave,duringthefirstthreeyearsofherstayinChicago,shehadinvestedinapieceofland。Inthemeanwhilethecityhadgrown,andintheyear1859shewasofferedfivethousanddollarsforherlot;thisoffersheacceptedandagainboughtasmallpieceofpropertyatashortdistancefromthecity。Theboyhadsincehiseighthyearattendedthepublicschool,andhadmadeastonishingprogress。Everydaywhenschoolwasout,shewouldmeethimatthegate,takehimbythehandandleadhimhome。
Ifanyoftheotherboysdaredtomakesportofher,ortoteasehimforhisdependenceuponher,itwassuretocostthatboyablackeye{。}
Hesoonsucceededinestablishinghimselfintherespectofhisschool—mates,forhewasthestrongestboyofhisownage,andeverreadytoprotectanddefendtheweakanddefenseless。
WhenThomasBright(forthatwasthenamebywhichhewasknown)wasfifteenyearsoldhewasofferedapositionasclerkintheofficeofalumber—merchant,andwithhismother’sconsentheacceptedit。Hewasafineyoungladnow,largeandwell—knit,andwithaclearearnestcountenance。Intheeveninghewouldbringhomebookstoread,andasithadalwaysbeenBrita’shabittointerestherselfinwhateverinterestedhim,shesoonfoundherselfstudyinganddiscussingwithhimthingswhichhadinformeryearsbeenfarbeyondthehorizonofhermind。Shehadathisrequestreluctantlygivenupherworkinthelumber—yards,andnowspentherdaysathome,busyingherselfwithsewingandreadingandsuchotherthingsaswomenfindtofillupavacanthour。
Oneevening,whenThomaswasinhisnineteenthyear,hereturnedfromhisofficewithagraverfacethanusual。Hismother’squickeyeimmediatelysawthatsomethinghadagitatedhim,butsheforboretoask。
"Mother,"saidheatlast,"whoismyfather?
Ishedeadoralive?"
"Godisyourfather,myson,"answeredshe,tremblingly。"Ifyouloveme,askmenomore。"
"Idoloveyou,mother,"hesaid,andgaveheragravelook,inwhichshethoughtshedetectedaminglingoftendernessandreproach。
"Anditshallbeasyouhavesaid。"
Itwasthefirsttimeshehadhadreasontoblushbeforehim,andheremotioncamenearoverwhelmingher;butwithaviolenteffortshestifledit,andremainedoutwardlycalm。
Hebeganpacingupanddownthefloorwithhisheadbentandhishandsonhisback。Itsuddenlyoccurredtoherthathewasagrownman,andthatshecouldnolongerholdthesamerelationtohimashissupporterandprotector。"Alas,"thoughtshe,"ifGodwillbutletmeremainhismother,IshallblessandthankHim。"
Itwasthefirsttimethissubjecthadbeenbroached,anditgaverisetomanyadoubtandmanyaquestionintheanxiousmother’smind。
Hadshebeenrightinconcealingfromhimthatwhichhemightjustlyclaimtoknow?Whathadbeenhermotiveinkeepinghimignorantofhisoriginandofthelandofhisbirth?Shehadwishedhimtogrowtothestrengthofman—
hood,unconsciousofguilt,sothathemightbearhisheadupright,andlooktheworldfearlesslyintheface。Andstill,hadtherenotinallthisbeenalurkingthoughtofherself,afearoflosinghislove,adesiretostandpureandperfectinhiseye?Shehardlydaredtoanswerthesequestions,for,alas,sheknewnotthatevenourpurestmotivesarebutpoorlyabletobearasearchingscrutiny。Shebegantosuspectthatherwholecoursewithhersonhadbeenwrongfromtheverybeginning。Whyhadshenottoldhimthesterntruth,evenifheshoulddespiseherforit,evenifsheshouldhavetostandablushingculpritinhispresence?Often,whensheheardhisfootstepsinthehall,ashereturnedfromtheworkoftheday,shewouldmanherselfupandthewordshovereduponherlips:
"Son,thouartabastardborn,achildofguilt,andthymotherisanoutcastupontheearth。"
Butwhenshemetthosecalmblueeyesofhis,sawtheunsuspectingfranknessofhismannerandthehopefulnesswithwhichhelookedtothefuture,herwomanlyheartshrankfromitsduty,andshehastenedoutoftheroom,threwherselfonherbed,andwept。FiercelyshewrestledwithGodinprayer,untilshethoughtthatevenGodhaddesertedher。Thusmonthspassedandyears,andtheconstantcareandanxietybegantoaffectherhealth。Shegrewpaleandnervous,andtheslightestnoisewouldannoyher。Inthemeanwhile,hermannertowardtheyoungmanhadbecomestrangelyaltered,andhesoonnoticedit,althoughheforboretospeak。Shewasscrupulouslymindfulofhiscomfort,anxiouslyanticipatedhiswants,andobservedtowardhimanevervigilantconsideration,asifhehadbeenhermasterinsteadofherson。
WhenThomaswastwenty—twoyearsofage,hewasofferedapartnershipinhisemployer’sbusiness,andwitheveryyearhisprospectsbrightened。Thesaleofhismother’spropertybroughthimaveryhandsomelittlefortune,whichenabledhimtobuildafineandcomfortablehouseinoneofthebestportionsofthecity。Thustheiroutwardcircumstancesweregreatlyimproved,andofcomfortandluxuryBritahadallandmorethanshehadeverdesired;butherhealthwasbrokendown,andthephysiciansdeclaredthatayearofforeigntravelandacontinuedresidenceinItalymightpossiblyrestoreher。Atlast,Thomas,too,begantourgeher,untilshefinallyyielded。ItwasonabrightmorninginMaythattheybothstartedforNewYork,andthreedayslatertheytooktheboatforEurope。Whatcountriestheyweretovisittheyhadhardlydecided,butafterabriefstayinEnglandwefindthemagainonasteamerboundforNorway。
IV。
Warmandgentleasitis,Juneoftencomestothefjord—valleysofNorwaywiththevoiceandthestrengthofagiant。Theglacierstotterandgroan,asifinangerattheirownweakness,andsendhugeavalanchesofstonesandicedownintothevalleys。Theriversswellandrushwithvociferousbrawloutoverthemountain—
sides,andathousandtinybrooksjoininthegeneralclamor,anddancewithnoisychatteroverthemoss—grownbirch—roots。Butlater,whenthestruggleisatanend,andJunehasvictoriouslyseatedherselfuponherthrone,hervoicebecomesmorerichlysubduedandbringsrestandcomforttotheearandtothetroubledheart。ItwaswhilethemonthwasinthislattermoodthatBritaandhersonenteredoncemorethevalleywhence,twenty—fiveyearsago,theyhadfled。Manystrange,turbulentemotionsstirredthemother’sbosom,asshesawagainthegreatsnow—cappedmountains,andthecalm,greenvalley,herchildhood’shome,lyingsosnuglyshelteredintheirmightyembrace。
EvenThomas’sbreastwasmovedwithvaguelysympatheticthrobs,asthiswondrousscenespreaditselfbeforehim。Theysoonsucceededinhiringafarm—house,abouthalfanhour’swalkfromBlakstad,and,accordingtoBrita’swish,establishedthemselvesthereforthesummer。
Shehadknownthepeoplewell,whenshewasyoung,buttheyneverthoughtofidentifyingherwiththemerrymaid,whohadoncestartledtheparishbyhersuddenflight;andshe,althoughshelongedtoopenherhearttothem,letnowordfalltobetrayherrealcharacter。Herconscienceaccusedherofplayingafalsepart,butforherson’ssakeshekeptsilent。
Then,oneday,——itwasthesecondSundayaftertheirarrival,——sheroseearlyinthemorning,andaskedThomastoaccompanyheronawalkupthroughthevalley。TherewasSabbathintheair;thesoftbreathofsummer,ladenwiththeperfumeoffreshleavesandfield—flowers,gentlywaftedintotheirfaces。Thesunglitteredinthedewygrass,thecricketssungwitharemotevoiceofwonder,andtheairseemedtobehalfvisible,andmovedintrem—
blingwaveletsonthepathbeforethem。Restingonherson’sarm,Britawalkedslowlyupthroughthefloweringmeadows;shehardlyknewwhitherherfeetboreher,butherheartbeatviolently,andsheoftenwasobligedtopauseandpressherhandsagainstherbosom,asiftostaytheturbulentemotions。
"Youarenotwell,mother,"saidtheson。
"Itwasimprudentinmetoallowyoutoexertyourselfinthisway。"
"Letussitdownonthisstone,"answeredshe。"Ishallsoonbebetter。Donotlooksoanxiouslyatme。Indeed,Iamnotsick。"
Hespreadhislightsummercoatonthestoneandcarefullyseatedher。Sheliftedherveilandraisedhereyestothelargered—roofedmansion,whosedarkoutlinesdrewthemselvesdimlyontheduskybackgroundofthepineforest。
Washestillalive,hewhoselife—hopeshehadwrecked,hewhohadoncedrivenheroutintothenightwithallbutacurseuponhislips?
Howwouldhereceiveher,ifsheweretoreturn?Ah,sheknewhim,andshetrembledattheverythoughtofmeetinghim。Butwasnottheguilthers?Couldshedepartfromthisvalley,couldshedieinpeace,withouthavingthrownherselfathisfeetandimploredhisfor—
giveness?Andthere,ontheoppositesideofthevalley,laythehomeofhimwhohadbeenthecauseofallhermisery。Whathadbeenhisfate,anddidhestillrememberthoselonghappysummerdays,ah!solong,longago?
Shehaddaredtoasknoquestionsofthepeoplewithwhomshelived,butnowasuddenweaknesshadovertakenher,andshefeltthatto—daymustdecideherfate;shecouldnolongerbearthistortureofuncertainty。Thomasremainedstandingathersideandlookedatherwithanxietyandwonder。Heknewthatshehadconcealedmanythingsfromhim,butwhateverherreasonsmightbe,hewasconfidentthattheywerejustandweighty。Itwasnotforhimtoquestionheraboutwhathemighthavenorighttoknow。Hefeltasifhehadneverlovedherasinthismoment,whensheseemedtobemostinneedofhim,andanoverwhelmingtendernesstookpossessionofhisheart。
Hesuddenlystoopeddown,tookherpale,thinfacebetweenhishandsandkissedher。Thelongpent—upemotionburstforthinafloodoftears;sheburiedherfaceinherlapandweptlongandsilently。Thenthechurch—bellsbegantopealdowninthevalley,andtheslowmightysoundfloatedcalmlyandsolemnlyuptothem。
Howmanylong—forgottenmemoriesofchildhoodandyouthdidtheynotwakeinherbosom——memoriesofthetimewhenthemerryGlitter—
Brita,deckedwithhershiningbrooches,wendedherwaytothechurchamongthegayly—dressedladsandmaidensoftheparish?
Aclusterofwhite—stemmedbirchesthrewitsshadowoverthestonewherethepenitentmotherwassitting,andthetallgrassonbothsidesofthepathnearlyhidherfromsight。
Presentlythechurch—folkbegantoappear,andBritaraisedherheadanddrewherveildownoverherface。Noonepassedwithoutgreetingthestrangers,andthewomenandmaidens,accordingtooldfashion,stoppedandcourtesied。Atlast,therecameanoldwhite—hairedman,leaningonthearmofamiddle—agedwoman。Hiswholefigurewasbentforward,andheoftenstoppedanddrewhisbreathheavily。
"Oh,yes,yes,"hesaid,illahoarse,brokenvoice,ashepassedbeforethem,"ageisgainingonmefast。Ican’tmoveaboutanymoreasofold。ButtochurchImustthisday。Godhelpme!Ihavedonemuchwrongandneedtoprayforforgiveness。"
"Youhadbettersitdownandrest,father,"
saidthewoman。"Hereisastone,andthefinelady,Iamsure,willallowaweakoldmantositdownbesideher。"
Thomasroseandmadeasigntotheoldmantotakehisseat。
"Oyes,yes,"hewentonmurmuring,asiftalkingtohimself。"Muchwrong——muchforgiveness。Godhelpusall——miserablesinners。
Hewhohatethnotfatherandmother——anddaughterisnotworthyofme。O,yes——yes——
Godcomfortusall。Helpmeup,Grimhild。I
thinkIcanmoveonagain,now。"
Thomas,ofcourse,didnotunderstandawordofwhathesaid,butseeingthathewishedtorise,hewillinglyofferedhisassistance,supportedhisarmandraisedhim。
"Thankstoyou,youngman,"saidthepeasant。
"AndmayGodrewardyourkindness。"
Andthetwo,fatheranddaughter,movedon,slowlyandlaboriously,astheyhadcome。
Thomasstoodfollowingthemwithhiseyes,untilalow,half—stifledmoansuddenlycalledhimtohismother’sside。Herframetrembledviolently。
"Mother,mother,"imploredhe,stoopingoverher,"whathashappened?Whyareyounomoreyourself?"
"Ah,myson,Icanbearitnolonger,"sobbedshe。"Godforgiveme——thoumustknowitall。"
Hesatdownathersideanddrewhercloselyuptohimandshehidherfaceonhisbosom。
Therewasalongsilence,onlybrokenbytheloudchirrupingofthecrickets。
"Myson,"shebeganatlast,stillhidingherface,"thouartachildofguilt。"
"Thathasbeennosecrettome,mother,"
answeredhe,gravelyandtenderly,"sinceIwasoldenoughtoknowwhatguiltwas。"
Shequicklyraisedherhead,andalookofamazement,ofjoyoussurprise,shonethroughthetearsthatveiledhereyes。Shecouldreadnothingbutfilialloveandconfidenceinthosegrave,manlyfeatures,andshesawinthatmomentthatallherdoubtshadbeengroundless,thatherlongprayerfulstrugglehadbeenfornaught。
"Ibroughttheeintotheworldnameless,"shewhispered,"andthouhastnowordofreproachforme?"
"WithGod’shelp,Iamstrongenoughtoconqueranameformyself,mother,"washisanswer。
Itwastheverywordsofherownsecretwish,anduponhislipstheysoundedlikeablessedassurance,likeamiraculousfulfillmentofhermotherlyprayer。
"Still,anotherthing,mychild,"shewentoninamoreconfidentvoice。"Thisisthynativeland,——andtheoldmanwhowasjustsittinghereatmysidewas——myfather。"
Andthere,intheshadowofthebirch—trees,inthesummerstillnessofthathour,shetoldhimthestoryofherlove,ofherflight,andofthemiseryoftheselong,toilsomefiveandtwentyyears。
Lateintheafternoon,Britaandhersonwereseenreturningtothefarm—house。Acalm,subduedhappinessbeamedfromthemother’scountenance;
shewasagainatpeacewiththeworldandherself,andherheartwasaslightasinthedaysofherearlyyouth。Butherbodilystrengthhadgivenout,andherlimbsalmostrefusedtosupporther。Thestrainuponhernervesandtheconstantefforthadhithertoenabledhertokeepup,butnow,whenthatstrainwasremoved,exhaustednatureclaimeditsright。Thenextday——shecouldnotleaveherbed,andwitheveryhourherstrengthfailed。Aphysicianwassentfor。Hegavemedicine,butnohope。Heshookhisheadgravely,ashewent,andbothmotherandsonknewwhatthatmeant。
Towardevening,BjarneBlakstadwassummoned,andcameatonce。Thomaslefttheroom,astheoldmanentered,andwhatpassedinthathourbetweenfatheranddaughter,onlyGodknows。Whenthedoorwasagainopened,Brita’seyesshonewithastrangebrilliancy,andBjarnelayonhiskneesbeforethebed,pressingherhandconvulsivelybetweenbothofhis。
"Thisismyson,father,"saidshe,inalanguagewhichhersondidnotunderstand;andafaintsmileofmotherlyprideandhappinessflittedoverherpalefeatures。"Iwouldgivehimtotheeinreturnforwhatthouhastlost;
butGodhaslaidhisfutureinanotherland。"
Bjarnerose,graspedhisgrandson’shand,andpressedit;andtwoheavytearsrandownhisfurrowedcheeks。"Alas,"murmuredhe,"myson,thatweshouldmeetthus。"
Theretheystood,boundtogetherbythebondsofblood,but,alas,therelayaworldbetweenthem。
Allnighttheysattogetheratthedyingwoman’sbedside。Notawordwasspoken。
Towardmorning,asthesunstoleintothedarkenedchamber,Britamurmuredtheirnames,andtheylaidtheirhandsinhers。
"Godbepraised,"whisperedshe,scarcelyaudibly,"Ihavefoundyouboth——myfatherandmyson。"Adeeppallorspreadoverhercountenance。Shewasdead。
Twodayslater,whenthebodywaslaidout,Thomasstoodaloneintheroom。Thewindowswerecoveredwithwhitesheets,andasubduedlightfelluponthepale,lifelesscountenance。
Deathhaddealtgentlywithher,sheseemedyoungerthanbefore,andherlightwavyhairfellsoftlyoverthewhiteforehead。Thentherecameamiddle—agedman,withadulleye,andabroadforehead,andtimidlyapproachedthelonelymourner。Hewalkedontip—toeandhisfigurestoopedheavily。Foralongwhilehestoodgazingatthedeadbody,thenhekneltdownatthefootofthecoffin,andbegantosobviolently。Atlasthearose,tooktwostepstowardtheyoungman,pausedagain,anddepartedsilentlyashehadcome。ItwasHalvard。
Closeunderthewallofthelittlered—paintedchurch,theydugthegrave;andaweeklaterherfatherwaslaidtorestathisdaughter’sside。
ButthefreshwindsblewovertheAtlanticandbeckonedthesontonewfieldsoflaborinthegreatlandofthefuture。
AGOOD—FOR—NOTHING。
RALPHGRIMwasbornagentleman。
Hehadthemisfortuneofcomingintotheworldsometenyearslaterthanmightreasonablyhavebeenexpected。
ColonelGrimandhisladyhadcelebratedtwelveanniversariesoftheirwedding—day,andhadgivenupallhopesofeverhavingasonandheir,whenthislate—comerstartledthembyhisunexpectedappearance。Theonlypreviousadditiontothefamilyhadbeenadaughter,andshewasthentensummersold。
Ralphwasaveryfeeblechild,andcouldonlywithgreatdifficultybepersuadedtoretainhisholdoftheslenderthreadwhichboundhimtoexistence。Hewasrubbedwithwhisky,andwrappedincotton,andgivenmare’smilktodrink,andGodknowswhatnot,andtheColonelsworearoundoathofpaternaldelightwhenatlasttheinfantstoppedgaspinginthatdistressingwayandbegantobreathelikeotherhumanbeings。Themother,who,inspiteofheranxietyforthechild’slife,hadfoundtimetoplotforhimacareeroffuturemagnificence,nowsuddenlysethimapartforliterature,becausethatwastheeasiestroadtofame,anddisposedofhiminmarriagetooneofthemostdistinguishedfamiliesoftheland。Shecautiouslysuggestedthistoherhusbandwhenhecametotakehisseatatherbedside;buttoherutterastonishmentshefoundthathehadbeenindulgingasimilartrainofthought,andhadalreadydestinedtheinfantprodigyforthearmy。She,however,couldnotgiveupherpredilectionforliterature,andtheColonel,whocouldnotbeartobecontradictedinhisownhouse,asheusedtosay,wasgettingeveryminutelouderandmoreflushed,when,happily,thedoctor’sarrivalinterruptedthedispute。
AsRalphgrewupfrominfancytochildhood,hebegantogivedecidedpromiseoffuturedistinction。Hewasfondofsittingdowninacornerandsuckinghisthumb,whichhismotherinterpretedasthesignofthatbroodingdispositionpeculiartopoetsandmenofloftygenius。
Attheageoffive,hehadbecomesolemasterinthehouse。HeslappedhissisterHildaintheface,orpulledherhair,whenshehesitatedtoobeyhim,tyrannizedoverhisnurse,andsternlyrefusedtogotobedinspiteofhismother’sentreaties。Onsuchoccasions,theColonelwouldhidehisfacebehindhisnewspaper,andchucklewithdelight;itwasevidentthatnaturehadintendedhissonforagreatmilitarycommander。AssoonasRalphhimselfwasoldenoughtohaveanythoughtsabouthisfuturedestiny,hemadeuphismindthathewouldliketobeapirate。Afewmonthslater,havingcontractedanimmoderatetasteforcandy,hecontentedhimselfwiththecomparativelyhumblepositionofabaker;butwhenhehadread"RobinsonCrusoe,"hemanifestedastrongdesiretogotoseainthehopeofbeingwreckedonsomedesolateisland。Theparentsspentlongeveningsgravelydiscussingtheseindicationsofuncommongenius,andeachinterpretedtheminhisorherownway。
"HeisnotlikeanyotherchildIeverknew,"
saidthemother。
"Tobesure,"respondedthefather,earnestly。
"Heisamostextraordinarychild。Iwasaveryremarkablechildtoo,evenifIdosayitmyself;but,asfarasIremember,Ineveraspiredtobeingwreckedonanuninhabitedisland。"
TheColonelprobablyspokethetruth;butheforgottotakeintoaccountthathehadneverread"RobinsonCrusoe。"
OfRalph’sschool—daysthereisbutlittletoreport,for,totellthetruth,hedidnotfancygoingtoschool,asthedisciplineannoyedhim。
Thedayafterhishavingenteredthegymnasium,whichwastopreparehimfortheMilitaryAcademy,theprincipalsawhimwaitingatthegateafterhisclasshadbeendismissed。Heapproachedhim,andaskedwhyhedidnotgohomewiththerest。
"Iamwaitingfortheservanttocarrymybooks,"wastheboy’sanswer。
"Givemeyourbooks,"saidtheteacher。
Ralphreluctantlyobeyed。ThatdaytheColonelwasnotalittlesurprisedtoseehissonmarchingupthestreet,andeverynowandthenglancingbehindhimwithalookofdiscomfortattheprincipal,whowasfollowingquietlyinhistrain,carryingaparcelofschool—books。
ColonelGrimandhiswife,diviningtheteacher’sintention,agreedthatitwasagreatoutrage,buttheydidnotmentionthemattertoRalph。
Henceforth,however,theboyrefusedtobeaccompaniedbyhisservant。Aweeklaterhewasimpudenttotheteacherofgymnastics,whowhippedhiminreturn。TheColonel’srageknewnobounds;herodeingreathastetothegymnasium,reviledtheteacherforpresumingtochastiseHISson,andcommittedtheboytothecareofaprivatetutor。
Attheageofsixteen,RalphwenttothecapitalwiththeintentionofenteringtheMilitaryAcademy。Hewasatall,handsomeyouth,slenderofstature,andcarriedhimselfaserectasacandle。Hehadalight,clearcomplexionofalmostfemininedelicacy;blonde,curlyhair,whichhealwayskeptcarefullybrushed;alowforehead,andastraight,finelymodelednose。
Therewasanexpressionofextremesensitivenessaboutthenostrils,andalookofindolenceinthedark—blueeyes。Buttheensembleofhisfeatureswaspleasing,hisdressirreproachable,andhismannersborenotraceoftheawkwardself—consciousnesspeculiartohisage。Immediatelyonhisarrivalinthecapitalhehiredasuiteofroomsinthearistocraticpartofthecity,andfurnishedthemratherexpensively,butinexcellenttaste。Fromabosomfriend,whomhemetbyaccidentintherestaurant’spavilioninthepark,helearnedthatapairofantlers,astuffedeagle,orfalcon,andacoupleofswords,wereindispensabletoawell—appointedapartment。Heaccordinglyboughtthesearticlesatacuriosity—shop。Duringthefirstweeksofhisresidenceinthecityhemadesomefeebleeffortstoperfecthimselfinmathematics,inwhichhesuspectedhewassomewhatdeficient。
Butwhenthesameofficiousfriendlaughedathim,andcalledhim"green,"hedeterminedtotrusttofortune,andhenceforthdevotedhimselfthemoreassiduouslytotheFrenchballet,wherehehadalreadymadesomeinterestingacquaintances。
Thetimefortheexaminationcame;theFrenchballetdidnotproveagoodpreparation;
Ralphfailed。Itquiteshookhimforthetime,andhefelthumiliated。Hehadnotthecouragetotellhisfather;sohelingeredonfromdaytoday,satvacantlygazingoutofhiswindow,andtriedvainlytointeresthimselfinthebusybustledownonthestreet。Itprovokedhimthateverybodyelseshouldbesolight—
hearted,whenhewas,oratleastfanciedhimself,introuble。Theparlorgrewintolerable;
hesoughtrefugeinhisbedroom。Therehesatoneevening(itwasthethirddayaftertheexamination),andstaredoutuponthegraystonewallswhichonallsidesenclosedthenarrowcourt—yard。TheroundstupidfaceofthemoonstoodtranquillydozinglikeagreatLimburgercheesesuspendedunderthesky。
Ralph,atleast,couldthinkofanomorefittingsimile。Butthebright—eyedyounggirlinthewindowhardbysentalonginglookuptothesamemoon,andthoughtofherdistanthomeonthefjords,wheretheglaciersstoodlikehoarygiants,andcaughttheyellowmoonbeamsontheirglitteringshieldsofsnow。Shehadbeenreading"Ivanhoe"alltheafternoon,untilthetwilighthadovertakenherquiteunaware,andnowshesuddenlyrememberedthatshehadforgottentowriteherGermanexercise。
Sheliftedherfaceandsawapairofsad,vacanteyes,gazingatherfromthenextwindowintheangleofthecourt。Shewasalittlestartledatfirst,butinthenextmomentshethoughtofherGermanexerciseandtookheart。
"DoyouknowGerman?"shesaid;thenimmediatelyrepentedthatshehadsaidit。
"Ido,"wastheanswer。
Shetookupherapronandbegantotwistitwithanairofembarrassment。
"Ididn’tmeananything,"shewhispered,atlast。
"Ionlywantedtoknow。"
"Youareverykind。"
Thatanswerrousedher;hewasevidentlymakingsportofher。
"Well,then,ifyoudo,youmaywritemyexerciseforme。Ihavemarkedtheplaceinthebook。"
Andsheflungherbookovertohiswindow,andhecaughtitontheedgeofthesill,justasitwasfalling。
"Youareaverystrangegirl,"heremarked,turningovertheleavesofthebook,althoughitwastoodarktoread。"Howoldareyou?"
"IshallbefourteensixweeksbeforeChristmas,"answeredshe,frankly。
"ThenIexcuseyou。"
"No,indeed,"criedshe,vehemently。"Youneedn’texcusemeatall。Ifyoudon’twanttowritemyexercise,youmaysendthebookbackagain。IamverysorryIspoketoyou,andI
shallneverdoitagain。"
"Butyouwillnotgetthebookbackagainwithouttheexercise,"repliedhe,quietly。
"Good—night。"
Thegirlstoodlonglookingafterhim,hopingthathewouldreturn。Then,withagreatburstofrepentance,shehidherfaceinherlap,andbegantocry。
"Oh,dear,Ididn’tmeantoberude,"shesobbed。"ButitwasIvanhoeandRebeccawhoupsetme。"
Thenextmorningshewasupbeforedaylight,andwaitedfortwolonghoursingreatsuspensebeforethecurtainofhiswindowwasraised。Hegreetedherpolitely;threwahastyglancearoundthecourttoseeifhewasobserved,andthentossedherbookdexterouslyoverintoherhands。
"Ihavepinnedthewrittenexercisetothefly—
leaf,"hesaid。"Youwillprobablyhavetimetocopyitbeforebreakfast。"
"Iameversomuchobligedtoyou,"shemanagedtostammer。
Helookedsotallandhandsome,andgrown—
up,andherremorsestuckinherthroat,andthreatenedtochokeher。Shehadtakenhimforaboyashesatthereinhiswindowtheeveningbefore。
"Bytheway,whatisyourname?"heasked,carelessly,asheturnedtogo。
"Bertha。"
"Well,mydearBertha,Iamhappytohavemadeyouracquaintance。"
Andheagainmadeherapolitebow,andenteredhisparlor。
"Howprovokinglyfamiliarheis,"thoughtshe;"butnoonecandenythatheishandsome。"
ThebrightroguishfaceoftheyounggirlhauntedRalphduringthewholenextweek。
Hehadbeeninloveatleasttentimesbefore,ofcourse;but,likemostboys,withyoungladiesfarolderthanhimself。Hefoundhimselffrequentlyglancingovertoherwindowinthehopeofcatchinganotherglimpseofherface;
butthecurtainwasalwaysdrawndown,andBertharemainedinvisible。Duringthesecondweek,however,sherelented,andtheyhadmanyapleasantchattogether。Henowvolunteeredtowriteallherexercises,andshemadenoobjections。Helearnedthatshewasthedaughterofawell—to—dopeasantinthesea—districtsofNorway(anditgavehimquiteashocktohearit),andthatshewasgoingtoschoolinthecity,andboardedwithanoldladywhokeptapensioninthehouseadjoiningtheoneinwhichhelived。
OnedayintheautumnRalphwassurprisedbythesuddenarrivalofhisfather,andthefactofhisfailureintheexaminationcouldnolongerbekeptasecret。TheoldColonelflaredupatoncewhenRalphmadehisconfession;thelargeveinsuponhisforeheadswelled;hegrewcoppery—
redinhisface,andstormedupanddownthefloor,untilhissonbecameseriouslyalarmed;
but,tohisgreatrelief,hewassoonmadeawarethathisfather’swrathwasnotturnedagainsthimpersonally,butagainsttheofficialsoftheMilitaryAcademywhohadrejectedhim。TheColoneltookitasaninsulttohisowngoodnameandirreproachablestandingasanofficer;
hepromptlyrefusedanyotherexplanation,andvainlyrackedhisbraintorememberifanyyouthfulfollyofhiscouldpossiblyhavemadehimenemiesamongtheteachersoftheAcademy。
Heatlastfeltsatisfiedthatitwasenvyofhisowngreatnessandrapidadvancementwhichhadinducedtherascalstotakevengeanceonhisson。Ralphreluctantlyfollowedhisfatherbacktothecountrytownwherethelatterwasstationed,andthefair—hairedBerthavanishedfromhishorizon。Hismother’swishnowprevailed,andhebegan,inhisowneasyway,topreparehimselffortheUniversity。HehadlittletasteforCicero,andstilllessforVirgil,butwiththeuseofa"pony"hesoongainedsufficientknowledgeoftheseauthorstobeabletotalkinasortofpatronizingwayaboutthem,tothegreatdelightofhisfondparents。Hetookquiteafancy,however,totheodeinHoraceendingwiththelines:
Dulceridentem,Dulceloquentem,Lalagenamabo。
AndinhisthoughthesubstitutedforLalagethefair—hairedBertha,quiteregardlessoftherequirementsofthemetre。
Tomakealongstoryshort,threeyearslaterRalphreturnedtothecapital,and,afterhavingwornoutseveraltutors,actuallysucceededinenteringtheUniversity。
Thefirstyearofcollegelifeisahappytimetoeveryyoungman,andRalphenjoyeditsprocessions,itsparliamentarygatherings,anditsleisure,aswellastherest。Hewascertainlynotthemantobesentimentaloverthelossofayounggirlwhom,moreover,hehadonlyknownforafewweeks。Nevertheless,hethoughtofheratoddtimes,butnotenoughtodisturbhispleasure。Thestandingofhisfamily,hisownhandsomeappearance,andhisimmaculatelinenopenedtohimthebesthousesofthecity,andhebecameagreatfavoriteinsociety。Atlectureshewasseldomseen,butmorefrequentlyinthetheatres,whereheusedtocomeinduringthemiddleofthefirstact,takehisstationinfrontoftheorchestrabox,andeye,throughhislorgnettes,byturns,theactressesandtheladiesoftheparquet。
II。
Twomonthspassed,andthencamethegreatannualballwhichthestudentsgiveattheopeningofthesecondsemester。Ralphwasamanofimportancethatevening;first,becausehebelongedtoagreatfamily;secondly,becausehewasthehandsomestmanofhisyear。Heworealargegoldenstaronhisbreast(forhisfellow—
studentshadmadehimaKnightoftheGoldenBoar),andabadgeofcoloredribbonsinhisbutton—hole。
Theballwasabrilliantaffair,andeverybodywasinexcellentspirits,especiallytheladies。
Ralphdancedincessantly,twirledhissoftmustache,andutteredamiableplatitudes。Itwastowardmidnight,justasthecompanywasmovingouttosupper,thathecaughttheglanceofapairofdark—blueeyes,whichsuddenlydrovethebloodtohischeeksandhastenedthebeatingofhisheart。Butwhenhelookedoncemorethedark—blueeyesweregone,andhisunrulyheartwentonhammeringagainsthisside。
Helaidhishandonhisbreastandglancedfurtivelyathisfairneighbor,butshelookedhappyandunconcerned,fortheflavoroftheice—creamwasdelicious。Itseemedanendlessmeal,but,whenitwasdone,Ralphrose,ledhispartnerbacktotheball—room,andhastilyexcusedhimself。Hisglancewanderedroundthewidehall,seekingthewell—rememberedeyesoncemore,and,atlength,findingtheminaremotecorner,halfhidbehindamovingwallofpromenaders。
InanothermomenthewasatBertha’sside。
"Youmusthavebeenpurposelyhidingyourself,MissBertha,"saidhe,whentheusualgreetingswereexchanged。"Ihavenotcaughtaglimpseofyouallthisevening,untilafewmomentsago。"
"ButIhaveseenyouallthewhile,"answeredthegirl,frankly。"IknewyouatonceasI
enteredthehall。"
"IfIhadbutknownthatyouwerehere,"
resumedRalph,asitwere,invisiblyexpandingwithanagreeablesenseofdignity,"Iassureyou,youwouldhavebeentheveryfirstoneI
shouldhavesought。"
Sheraisedherlargegraveeyestohis,asifquestioninghissincerity;butshemadenoanswer。
"Goodgracious!"thoughtRalph。"Shetakesthingsterriblyinearnest。"
"Youlooksoserious,MissBertha,"saidhe,afteramoment’spause。"Irememberyouasabright—eyed,flaxen—hairedlittlegirl,whothrewherGermanexercise—booktomeacrosstheyard,andwhosemerrylaughterstillringspleasantlyinmymemory。IconfessIdon’tfinditquiteeasytoidentifythisgraveyoungladywithmymerryfriendofthreeyearsago。"
"Inotherwords,youaredisappointedatnotfindingmethesameasIusedtobe。"
"No,notexactlythat;but——"
Ralphpausedandlookedpuzzled。Therewassomethingintheearnestnessofhermannerwhichmadeafacetiouscomplimentseemgrosslyinappropriate,andinthemomentnootherescapesuggesteditself。
"Butwhat?"demandedBertha,mercilessly。
"Haveyoueverlostanoldfriend?"
askedhe,abruptly。
"Yes;howso?"
"Then,"answeredhe,whilehisfeatureslightedupwithahappyinspiration——"thenyouwillappreciatemysituation。Ifondlycherishedmyoldpictureofyouinmymemory。NowI
havelostit,andIcannothelpregrettingtheloss。Idonotmean,however,toimplythatthisnewacquaintance——thissecondeditionofyourself,sotospeak——willprovelessinteresting。"
Sheagainsenthimagrave,questioninglook,andbegantogazeintentlyuponthestoneinherbracelet。
"Isupposeyouwilllaughatme,"beganshe,whileasuddenblushflittedoverhercountenance。
"Butthisismyfirstball,andIfeelasifIhadrushedintoawhirlpool,fromwhichI
have,sincethefirstrashplungewasmade,beenvainlytryingtoescape。Ifeelsodreadfullyforlorn。Ihardlyknowanybodyhereexceptmycousin,whoinvitedme,andIhardlythinkIknowhimeither。"
"Well,sinceyouareirredeemablycommitted,"
repliedRalph,asthemusic,aftersomeprefatoryflourishes,brokeintothedeliciousrhythmofaStrausswaltz,"thenitisnousestrugglingagainstfate。Come,letusmaketheplungetogether。Miserylovescompany。"
Heofferedherhisarm,andshearose,somewhathesitatingly,andfollowed。
"Iamafraid,"shewhispered,astheyfellintolinewiththeprocessionthatwasmovingdownthelonghall,"thatyouhaveaskedmetodancemerelybecauseIsaidIfeltforlorn。Ifthatisthecase,Ishouldprefertobeledbacktomyseat。"
"Whatabaseimputation!"criedRalph。
Therewassomethingsocharminglynaiveinthisself—depreciation——somethingsoaltogethernovelinhisexperience,and,hecouldnothelpadding,justalittlebitcountrified。Hisspiritsrose;hebegantorelishkeenlyhispositionasanexperiencedmanoftheworld,and,intheagreeableglowofpatronageandconscioussuperiority,chattedwithheartyABANDONwithhislittlerusticbeauty。
"IfyourdancingisasperfectasyourGermanexerciseswere,"saidshe,laughing,astheyswungoutuponthefloor,"thenIpromisemyselfagooddealofpleasurefromourmeeting。"
"Neverfear,"answeredhe,quicklyreversinghisstep,andwhirlingwithmanyacapriciousturnawayamongthethrongingcouples。
WhenRalphdrovehomeinhiscarriagetowardmorninghebrieflysummeduphisimpressionsofBerthainthefollowingadjectives:
intelligent,delightfullyunsophisticated,alittlebitverdant,butdevilishpretty。
SomeweekslaterColonelGrimreceivedanappointmentatthefortressofAggershuus,andimmediatelytookuphisresidenceinthecapital。
Hesawthathissoncutafinefigureinthehighestcirclesofsociety,andexpressedhisgratificationinthemostemphaticterms。Ifhehadknown,however,thatRalphwasinthehabitofvisiting,withalarmingregularity,atthehouseofaplebeianmerchantinasomewhatobscurestreet,hewould,nodoubt,havebeenmorecharyofhispraise。ButtheColonelsuspectednothing,anditwaswellforthepeaceofthefamilythathedidnot。ItmayhavebeencowardiceinRalphthathenevermentionedBertha’snametohisfamilyortohisaristocraticacquaintances;for,tobecandid,hehimselffeltashamedofthepowersheexertedoverhim,andbyturnspitiedandridiculedhimselfforpursuingsoingloriousaconquest。Neverthelessitwoundedhisegotismthatshenevershowedanysurpriseatseeinghim,thatshereceivedhimwithacertainfrankunceremoniousness,which,however,wasverybecomingtoher;