But,mindyou,whenaboystarvesinthestreetsEightyearstogetherasmyfortunewas,Watchingfolk’sfacestoknowwhowillflingThebitofhalf-strippedgrape-bunchhedesires,Andwhowillcurseorkickhimforhispains,——
Whichgentlemanprocessionalandfine,HoldingacandletotheSacrament,WillwinkandlethimliftaplateandcatchThedroppingsofthewaxtosellagain,[120]
OrhollafortheEightandhavehimwhipped,——
HowsayI?——nay,whichdogbites,whichletsdropHisbonefromtheheapofoffalinthestreet,——
Why,soulandsenseofhimgrowsharpalike,Helearnsthelookofthings,andnonethelessForadmonitionfromthehunger-pinch。
Ihadastoreofsuchremarks,besure,Which,afterIfoundleisure,turnedtouse:
Idrewmen’sfacesonmycopy-books,Scrawledthemwithintheantiphonary’smarge,[130]
Joinedlegsandarmstothelongmusic-notes,FoundeyesandnoseandchinforA’sandB’s,AndmadeastringofpicturesoftheworldBetwixttheinsandoutsofverbandnoun,Onthewall,thebench,thedoor。Themonkslookedblack。”Nay,”quoththePrior,”turnhimout,d’yesay?
Innowise。Loseacrowandcatchalark。
Whatifatlastwegetourmanofparts,WeCarmelites,likethoseCamaldoleseAndPreachingFriars,todoourchurchupfine[140]
Andputthefrontonitthatoughttobe!”
Andhereuponhebademedaubaway。
Thankyou!myheadbeingcrammed,thewallsablank,Neverwassuchpromptdisemburdening。
Firsteverysortofmonk,theblackandwhite,Idrewthem,fatandlean:then,folksatchurch,FromgoodoldgossipswaitingtoconfessTheircribsofbarrel-droppings,candle-ends,——
Tothebreathlessfellowatthealtar-foot,Freshfromhismurder,safeandsittingthere[150]
WiththelittlechildrenroundhiminarowOfadmiration,halfforhisbeard,andhalfForthatwhiteangerofhisvictim’ssonShakingafistathimwithonefiercearm,SigninghimselfwiththeotherbecauseofChristWhosesadfaceonthecrossseesonlythisAfterthepassionofathousandyears,Tillsomepoorgirl,heraprono’erherheadWhichtheintenseeyeslookedthrough,cameateveOntiptoe,saidaword,droppedinaloaf,[160]
Herpairofear-ringsandabunchofflowersThebrutetookgrowling,prayed,andsowasgone。
Ipaintedall,thencried,”’Tisaskandhave;
Choose,formore’sready!”——laidtheladderflat,Andshowedmycoveredbitofcloister-wall。
ThemonksclosedinacircleandpraisedloudTillchecked,taughtwhattoseeandnottosee,Beingsimplebodies,——”That’stheveryman!
Lookattheboywhostoopstopatthedog!
Thatwoman’slikethePrior’sniecewhocomes[170]
Tocareabouthisasthma:it’sthelife!”
Buttheremytriumph’sstraw-fireflaredandfunked;
Theirbetterstooktheirturntoseeandsay:
ThepriorandthelearnedpulledafaceAndstoppedallthatinnotime。”How?what’shere?
Quitefromthemarkofpainting,blessusall!
Faces,arms,legs,andbodieslikethetrueAsmuchaspeaandpea!it’sdevil’sgame!
Yourbusinessisnottocatchmenwithshow,Withhomagetotheperishableclay,[180]
Butliftthemoverit,ignoreitall,Makethemforgetthere’ssuchathingasflesh。
Yourbusinessistopaintthesoulsofmen——
Man’ssoul,andit’safire,smoke……no,it’snot……
It’svapordoneuplikeanew-bornbabe——
Inthatshapewhenyoudieitleavesyourmouth,It’s……well,whatmatterstalking,it’sthesoul!
Giveusnomoreofbodythanshowssoul!
Here’sGiotto,withhisSainta-praisingGod,Thatsetsuspraising,——whynotstopwithhim?[190]
WhyputallthoughtsofpraiseoutofourheadWithwonderatlines,colors,andwhatnot?
Paintthesoul,nevermindthelegsandarms!
Ruballout,tryatitasecondtime!
Oh,thatwhitesmallishfemalewiththebreasts,She’sjustmyniece……Herodias,Iwouldsay,——
Whowentanddanced,andgotmen’sheadscutoff!
Haveitallout!”Now,isthissense,Iask?
Afinewaytopaintsoul,bypaintingbodySoill,theeyecan’tstopthere,mustgofurther[200]
Andcan’tfareworse!Thus,yellowdoesforwhiteWhenwhatyouputforyellow’ssimplyblack,AndanysortofmeaninglooksintenseWhenallbesideitselfmeansandlooksnaught。
Whycan’tapainterlifteachfootinturn,Leftfootandrightfoot,goadoublestep,Makehisfleshlikerandhissoulmorelike,Bothintheirorder?Taketheprettiestface,ThePrior’sniece……patron-saint——isitsoprettyYoucan’tdiscoverifitmeanshope,fear,[210]
Sorroworjoy?won’tbeautygowiththese?
SupposeI’vemadehereyesallrightandblue,Can’tItakebreathandtrytoaddlife’sflash,Andthenaddsoulandheightenthemthreefold?
Orsaythere’sbeautywithnosoulatall——
Ineversawit——putthecasethesame——
Ifyougetsimplebeautyandnaughtelse,YougetaboutthebestthingGodinvents:
That’ssomewhat:andyou’llfindthesoulyouhavemissed,Withinyourself,whenyoureturnhimthanks。[220]”Ruballout!”Well,well,there’smylife,inshort,Andsothethinghasgoneoneversince。
I’mgrownamannodoubt,I’vebrokenbounds:
YoushouldnottakeafelloweightyearsoldAndmakehimsweartoneverkissthegirls。
I’mmyownmaster,paintnowasIplease——
Havingafriend,yousee,intheCorner-house!
Lord,it’sfastholdingbytheringsinfront——
ThosegreatringsservemorepurposesthanjustToplantaflagin,ortieupahorse![230]
Andyettheoldschoolingsticks,theoldgraveeyesArepeepingo’ermyshoulderasIwork,Theheadsshakestill——”It’sart’sdecline,myson!
You’renotofthetruepainters,greatandold;
BrotherAngelico’stheman,you’llfind;
BrotherLorenzostandshissinglepeer:
Fagonatflesh,you’llnevermakethethird!”
`Flowero’thepine,Youkeepyourmistr……manners,andI’llsticktomine!’
I’mnotthethird,then:blessus,theymustknow![240]
Don’tyouthinkthey’rethelikeliesttoknow,TheywiththeirLatin?So,Iswallowmyrage,Clinchmyteeth,suckmylipsintight,andpaintTopleasethem——sometimesdo,andsometimesdon’t;
For,doingmost,there’sprettysuretocomeAturn,somewarmevefindsmeatmysaints——
Alaugh,acry,thebusinessoftheworld——
`Flowero’thepeach,Deathforusall,andhisownlifeforeach!’
Andmywholesoulrevolves,thecuprunsover,[250]
Theworldandlife’stoobigtopassforadream,AndIdothesewildthingsinsheerdespite,Andplaythefooleriesyoucatchmeat,Inpurerage!Theoldmill-horse,outatgrassAfterhardyears,throwsuphisstiffheelsso,AlthoughthemillerdoesnotpreachtohimTheonlygoodofgrassistomakechaff。
Whatwouldmenhave?Dotheylikegrassorno——
Maytheyormayn’tthey?allIwant’sthethingSettledforeveroneway。Asitis,[260]
Youtelltoomanyliesandhurtyourself:
Youdon’tlikewhatyouonlyliketoomuch,Youdolikewhat,ifgivenyouatyourword,Youfindabundantlydetestable。
Forme,IthinkIspeakasIwastaught;
Ialwaysseethegarden,andGodthereA-makingman’swife:and,mylessonlearned,Thevalueandsignificanceofflesh,Ican’tunlearntenminutesafterwards。
Youunderstandme:I’mabeast,Iknow。[270]
Butsee,now——why,IseeascertainlyAsthatthemorning-star’sabouttoshine,Whatwillhapsomeday。We’veayoungsterhereComestoourconvent,studieswhatIdo,Slouchesandstaresandletsnoatomdrop:
HisnameisGuidi——he’llnotmindthemonks——
TheycallhimHulkingTom,heletsthemtalk——
Hepicksmypracticeup——he’llpaintapace,Ihopeso——thoughIneverlivesolong,Iknowwhat’ssuretofollow。Youbejudge![280]
YouspeaknoLatinmorethanI,belike;
However,you’remyman,you’veseentheworld——Thebeautyandthewonderandthepower,Theshapesofthings,theircolors,lights,andshades,Changes,surprises,——andGodmadeitall!——
Forwhat?Doyoufeelthankful,ayorno,Forthisfairtown’sface,yonderriver’sline,Themountainrounditandtheskyabove,Muchmorethefiguresofman,woman,child,Thesearetheframeto?What’sitallabout?[290]
Tobepassedover,despised?ordweltupon,Wonderedat?oh,thislastofcourse!——yousay。
Butwhynotdoaswellassay,——painttheseJustastheyare,carelesswhatcomesofit?
God’sworks——paintanyone,andcountitcrimeToletatruthslip。Don’tobject,”HisworksAreherealready;natureiscomplete:
Supposeyoureproduceher——whichyoucan’t
There’snoadvantage!youmustbeather,then。”
For,don’tyoumark?we’remadesothatwelove[300]
Firstwhenweseethempainted,thingswehavepassedPerhapsahundredtimesnorcaredtosee;
Andsotheyarebetter,painted——bettertous,Whichisthesamething。Artwasgivenforthat;
Godusesustohelpeachotherso,Lendingourmindsout。Haveyounoticed,nowYourcullion’shangingface?Abitofchalk,Andtrustmebutyoushould,though!HowmuchmoreIfIdrewhigherthingswiththesametruth!
ThatweretotakethePrior’spulpit-place,[310]
InterpretGodtoallofyou!Oh,oh,ItmakesmemadtoseewhatmenshalldoAndweinourgraves!Thisworld’snoblotforus,Norblank;itmeansintensely,andmeansgood:
Tofinditsmeaningismymeatanddrink。”Ay,butyoudon’tsoinstigatetoprayer!”
StrikesinthePrior:”whenyourmeaning’splainItdoesnotsaytofolks——remembermatins,Or,mindyourfastnextFriday!”Why,forthisWhatneedofartatall?Askullandbones,[320]
Twobitsofsticknailedcross-wise,or,what’sbest,Abelltochimethehourwith,doesaswell。
IpaintedaSaintLaurencesixmonthssinceAtPrato,splashedthefrescoinfinestyle:”Howlooksmypainting,nowthescaffold’sdown?”
Iaskabrother:”Hugely,”hereturns——”AlreadynotonephizofyourthreeslavesWhoturntheDeaconoffhistoastedside,But’sscratchedandproddedtoourheart’scontent,Thepiouspeoplehavesoeasedtheirown[330]
Withcomingtosayprayersthereinarage:
Wegetonfasttoseethebricksbeneath。
Expectanotherjobthistimenextyear,Forpityandreligiongrowi’thecrowd——
Yourpaintingservesitspurpose!”Hangthefools!——
Thatis——you’llnotmistakeanidlewordSpokeinahuffbyapoormonk,Gotwot,TastingtheairthisspicynightwhichturnsTheunaccustomedheadlikeChiantiwine!
Oh,thechurchknows!don’tmisreportme,now![340]
It’snaturalapoormonkoutofboundsShouldhavehisaptwordtoexcusehimself:
AndhearkenhowIplottomakeamends。
Ihavebethoughtme:Ishallpaintapiece……There’sforyou!Givemesixmonths,thengo,seeSomethinginSant’Ambrogio’s!Blessthenuns!
Theywantacasto’myoffice。IshallpaintGodinthemidst,Madonnaandherbabe,Ringedbyabowery,floweryangel-brood,Liliesandvestmentsandwhitefaces,sweet[350]
Aspuffonpuffofgratedorris-rootWhenladiescrowdtochurchatmidsummer。
Andtheni’thefront,ofcourseasaintortwo——
SaintJohn,becausehesavestheFlorentines,SaintAmbrose,whoputsdowninblackandwhiteTheconvent’sfriendsandgivesthemalongday,AndJob,Imusthavehimtherepastmistake,ThemanofUzandUswithoutthez,Painterswhoneedhispatience。Well,alltheseSecuredattheirdevotion,upshallcome[360]
Outofacornerwhenyouleastexpect,Asonebyadarkstairintoagreatlight,Musicandtalking,whobutLippo!I!——
Mazed,motionless,andmoon-struck——I’mtheman!
BackIshrink——whatisthisIseeandhear?
I,caughtupwithmymonk’sthingsbymistake,Myoldsergegownandropethatgoesallround,I,inthispresence,thispurecompany!
Where’sahole,where’sacornerforescape?
Thenstepsasweetangelicslipofathing[370]
Forward,putsoutasoftpalm——”Notsofast!”