Alone!
Heneededtobe。Thestrongestmustpausewhentheprecipiceyawnsbeforehim。Thegulfcanbespanned;hefeelshimselfforcefulenoughforthat;buthiseyesmusttaketheirmeasurementofitfirst;hemustknowitsdepthsandpossibledangers。Onlyafoolwouldignorethesesteepsofjaggedrock;andhewasnofool,onlyamantowhomtheunexpectedhadhappened,amanwhohadseenhiswaycleartothehorizonandthenhadcomeupagainstthis!Love,whenhethoughtsuchfollydead!Remorse,whenGlorycalledforthequietmindandheart!
Herecogniseditsmordantfang,andknewthatitsravages,thoughonlyjustbegun,wouldlasthislifetime。Nothingcouldstopthemnow,nothing,nothing。Andhelaughed,asthethoughtwenthome;
laughedattheironyoffateanditsinexorableness;laughedathisowndefeatandhisnearnesstoabarredParadise。OswaldlovedEdith,lovedheryet,withaflametimewouldtakelongtoquench。DorislovedOswaldandheDoris;andnotoneofthemwouldeverattainthedelightseachwassofittedtoenjoy。Whyshouldn’thelaugh?Whatislefttomanbutmockerywhenallpropsfall?Disappointmentwastheuniversallot;anditshouldgomerrilywithhimifhemusttakehisturnatit。Butherethestrongspiritofthemanre-asserteditself;itshouldbebutaturn。Aman’sjoysarenotboundedbyhislovesorevenbythesatisfactionofaperfectlyuntrammelledmind。Performancemakesaworldofitsownforthecapableandthestrong,andthiswasstilllefttohim。He,OrlandoBrotherson,despairwhilehisgreatworklayunfinished!Thatwouldbetolaystressontheinevitablepainsandfearsofcommonplacehumanity。
Hewasnotofthatilk。Intellectwashisgod;ambitionhismotivepower。Whatwouldthiscasualblightuponhissupremecontentmentbetohim,whenwiththewingsofhisair-carspread,heshouldspurntheearthandsoarintotheheavenoffamesimultaneouslywithhisflightintotheopen。
Hecouldwaitforthathour。Hehadmeasuredthegulfbeforehimandfounditpassable。Henceforthnolookingback。
Rising,hestoodforamomentgazing,withanalerteyenow,uponsuchsectionsofhiscarashadnotyetbeenfittedintotheirplaces;thenhebentforwardtohiswork,andsoonthelipswhichhadutteredthatsardoniclaughafewminutesbefore,partedingentlerfashion,andsongtooktheplaceofcurses-aballadofloveandfondesttruth。ButOrlandoneverknewwhathesang。Hehadthegiftandusedit。
Wouldhistones,however,haverungoutwithquitesomellowasweetnesshadheseentherestlessfigureeventhencirclinghisretreatwitheyesdartingaccusationandarmsliftedtowardshiminwildbutimpotentthreat?
Yes,Ithinktheywould;forheknewthatthemanwhothusexpressedhishelplessnessalongwithhisconvictions,wasnonearertheendhehadsethimselftoattainthanonthedayhefirstbetrayedhissuspicions。
THEHUTCHANGESITSNAME
ThatnightOswaldwastakenveryill。Forthreedayshislifehunginthebalance,thenyouthandhealthylivingtriumphedovershockandbereavement,andhecameslowlybacktohissadandcrippledexistence。
Hehadbeenconsciousforaweekormoreofhissurroundings,andofhisbittersorrowsaswell,whenonemorningheaskedDoriswhosefaceitwashehadseenbendingoverhimsooftenduringthelastweek:”Haveyouanewdoctor?Amanwithwhitehairandacomfortingsmile?OrhaveIdreamedthisface?Ihavehadsomanyfanciesthismighteasilybeoneofthem。””No,itisnotafancy,”wasthequietreply。”Norisitthefaceofadoctor。Itisthatoffriend。Onewhoseheartisboundupinyourrecovery;oneforwhomyoumustlive,Mr。Brotherson。””Idon’tknowhim,Doris。It’sastrangefacetome。Andyet,it’snotaltogetherstrange。Whoisthismanandwhyshouldhecareformesodeeply?””Becauseyoushareoneloveandonegrief。ItisEdith’sfatherwhomyouseeatyourbedside。Hehashelpedtonurseyoueversinceyoucamedownthissecondtime。””Edith’sfather!Doris,itcannotbe。Edith’sfather!””Yes,Mr。ChallonerhasbeeninDerbyforthelasttwoweeks。Hehasonlyoneinterestnow;toseeyouwellagain。””Why?”
Doriscaughtthenoteofpain,ifnotsuspicion,inthisquery,andsmiledassheaskedinturn:”Shallheanswerthatquestionhimself?Heiswaitingtocomein。
Nottotalk。Youneednotfearhistalking。He’sasquietasanymanIeversaw。”
Thesickmanclosedhiseyes,andDoriswatching,sawtheflushrisetohisemaciatedcheek,thenslowlyfadeawayagaintoapallorthatfrightenedher。Hadsheinjuredwhereshewouldheal?Hadshepressedtoosuddenlyandtoohardontheevergapingwoundinherinvalid’sbreast?Shegaspedinterroratthethought,thenshefaintlysmiled,forhiseyeshadopenedagainandshowedacalmdeterminationashesaid:”Ishouldliketoseehim。IshouldlikehimtoanswerthequestionIhavejustputyou。Ishouldresteasierandgetwellfaster-ornotgetwellatall。”
Thislatterhehalfwhispered,andDoris,trippingfromtheroommaynothaveheardit,forherfaceshowednofurthershadowassheusheredinMr。Challoner,andclosedthedoorbehindhim。Shehadlookedforwardtothismomentfordays。ToOswald,however,itwasanunexpectedexcitementandhisvoicetrembledwithsomethingmorethanphysicalweaknessashegreetedhisvisitorandthankedhimforhisattentions。”DorissaysthatyouhaveshownmethiskindnessfromthedesireyouhavetoseemewellagainMr。Challoner。Isthistrue?””Verytrue。Icannotemphasisethefacttoostrongly。”
Oswald’seyesmethisagain,thistimewithgreatearnestness。”Youmusthaveseriousreasonsforfeelingso-reasonswhichIdonotquiteunderstand。MayIaskwhyyouplacesuchvalueuponalifewhich,ifeverusefultoitselforothers,haslostandlostforever,theonedelightwhichgaveitmeaning?”
ItwasforMr。Challoner’svoicetotremblenow,asreachingouthishand,hedeclared,withunmistakablefeeling:”Ihavenoson。Ihavenointerestleftinlife,outsidethisroomandthepossibilitiesitcontainsforme。Yourattachmenttomydaughterhascreatedabondbetweenus,Mr。Brotherson,whichI
sincerelyhopetoseerecognisedbyyou。”
Startledanddeeplymoved,theyoungmanstretchedoutashakinghandtowardshisvisitor,withthefeeblebutexultingcry:”Thenyoudonotblamemeforherwretchedandmysteriousdeath。
Youholdmeguiltlessofthemiserywhichnervedherdespairingarm?””Quiteguiltless。”
Oswald’swanandpinchedfeaturestookonabeautifulexpressionandMr。Challonernolongerwonderedathisdaughter’schoice。”ThankGod!”fellfromthesickman’slips,andthentherewasasilenceduringwhichtheirtwohandsmet。
ItwassomeminutesbeforeeitherspokeandthenitwasOswaldwhosaid:”Imustconfidetoyoucertainfacts。Ihonouredyourdaughterandrealisedherpositionfully。Ourplightwasnevermadeinwords,norshouldIhavepresumedtoadvanceanyclaimtoherhandifIhadnotmadegoodmyexpectations,Mr。Challoner。Imeanttowinbothherregardandyoursbyacts,notwords。IfeltthatI
hadagreatdealtodoandIwaspreparedtoworkandwait。Ilovedher-”Heturnedawayhisheadandthesilencewhichfilledupthegap,unitedthosetwohearts,astheoldandyoungareseldomunited。
Butwhenalittlelater,Mr。ChallonerrejoinedDoris,inherlittlesitting-room,heneverthelessshowedaperplexityshehadhopedtoseeremovedbythisunderstandingwiththeyoungerBrotherson。
Thecausebecameapparentassoonashespoke。”Thesebrothersholdbyeachother,”saidhe。”OswaldwillhearnothingagainstOrlando。Hesaysthathehasredeemedhisfault。
Hedoesnotevenprotestthathisbrother’swordistobebelievedinthismatter。Hedoesnotseemtothinkthatnecessary。HeevidentlyregardsOrlando’spersonalityasspeakingastrulyandsatisfactorilyforitself,ashisowndoes。AndIdarednotundeceivehim。””Hedoesnotknowallourreasonsfordistrust。Hehasheardnothingaboutthepoorwasherwoman。””No,andhemustnot,-notforweeks。Hehasborneallthathecan。””Hisconfidenceinhisolderbrotherissublime。Idonotshareit;
butIcannothelpbutrespecthimforit。”
Itwaswarmlysaid,andMr。Challonercouldnotforbearcastingananxiouslookatherupturnedface。Whathesawtheremadehimturnawaywithasigh。”Thisconfidencehasformeaveryunhappyside,”heremarked。”ItshowsmeOswald’sthought。Hewholovedherbest,acceptsthecruelverdictofanunreasoningpublic。”
Doris’largeeyesburnedwithaweirdlightuponhisface。”Hehasnothadmydream,”shemurmured,withallthequietofanunmovedconviction。
Yetasthedayswentby,evenhermannerchangedtowardsthebusyinventor。Itwashardlypossibleforitnotto。Thehighstandhetook;theregardaccordedhimoneveryside;histalent;hisconversation,whichwasaneducationinitself,and,aboveall,hisabsorptioninaworkdailyadvancingtowardscompletion,removedhimsoinsensiblyandyetsodecidedly,fromthehideouspastoftragedywithwhichhisname,ifnothishonour,wasassociated,that,unconsciouslytoherself,shegraduallylosthericyairofrepulsionandlenthimamoreorlessattentiveear,whenhechosetojointheirsmallcompanyofanevening。Theresultwasthatheturnedsobrightasideuponherthattolerationmergedfromdaytodayintoadmirationandmemorylostitselfinanticipationoftheeventwhichwastoprovehimamanofmen,ifnotoneoftheworld’sgreatestmechanicalgeniuses。
Meantime,Oswaldwassteadilyimprovinginhealth,ifnotinspirits。
第39章