’Youcan’tthinkhowgoodsheis,sir,’saidLittleDorrit,withinfinitetenderness。
’GoodSHEis,’echoedMaggy,transferringthepronouninamostexpressivewayfromherselftoherlittlemother。
’Orhowclever,’saidLittleDorrit。’Shegoesonerrandsaswellasanyone。’Maggylaughed。’AndisastrustworthyastheBankofEngland。’Maggylaughed。’Sheearnsherownlivingentirely。
Entirely,sir!’saidLittleDorrit,inalowerandtriumphanttone。
’Reallydoes!’
’Whatisherhistory?’askedClennam。
’Thinkofthat,Maggy?’saidLittleDorrit,takinghertwolargehandsandclappingthemtogether。’Agentlemanfromthousandsofmilesaway,wantingtoknowyourhistory!’
’Myhistory?’criedMaggy。’Littlemother。’
’Shemeansme,’saidLittleDorrit,ratherconfused;’sheisverymuchattachedtome。Heroldgrandmotherwasnotsokindtoherassheshouldhavebeen;wasshe,Maggy?’
Maggyshookherhead,madeadrinkingvesselofherclenchedlefthand,drankoutofit,andsaid,’Gin。’Thenbeatanimaginarychild,andsaid,’Broom-handlesandpokers。’
’WhenMaggywastenyearsold,’saidLittleDorrit,watchingherfacewhileshespoke,’shehadabadfever,sir,andshehasnevergrownanyoldereversince。’
’Tenyearsold,’saidMaggy,noddingherhead。’Butwhatanicehospital!Socomfortable,wasn’tit?Ohsoniceitwas。SuchaEv’nlyplace!’
’Shehadneverbeenatpeacebefore,sir,’saidLittleDorrit,turningtowardsArthurforaninstantandspeakinglow,’andshealwaysrunsoffuponthat。’
’Suchbedsthereisthere!’criedMaggy。’Suchlemonades!Suchoranges!Suchd’liciousbrothandwine!SuchChicking!Oh,AIN’T
itadelightfulplacetogoandstopat!’
’SoMaggystoppedthereaslongasshecould,’saidLittleDorrit,inherformertoneoftellingachild’sstory;thetonedesignedforMaggy’sear,’andatlast,whenshecouldstoptherenolonger,shecameout。Then,becauseshewasnevertobemorethantenyearsold,howeverlongshelived——’
’Howeverlongshelived,’echoedMaggy。
’Andbecauseshewasveryweak;indeedwassoweakthatwhenshebegantolaughshecouldn’tstopherself——whichwasagreatpity——’
Maggymightygraveofasudden。
’Hergrandmotherdidnotknowwhattodowithher,andforsomeyearswasveryunkindtoherindeed。Atlength,incourseoftime,Maggybegantotakepainstoimproveherself,andtobeveryattentiveandveryindustrious;andbydegreeswasallowedtocomeinandoutasoftenassheliked,andgotenoughtodotosupportherself,anddoessupportherself。Andthat,’saidLittleDorrit,clappingthetwogreathandstogetheragain,’isMaggy’shistory,asMaggyknows!’
Ah!ButArthurwouldhaveknownwhatwaswantingtoitscompleteness,thoughhehadneverheardofthewordsLittlemother;
thoughhehadneverseenthefondlingofthesmallsparehand;
thoughhehadhadnosightforthetearsnowstandinginthecolourlesseyes;thoughhehadhadnohearingforthesobthatcheckedtheclumsylaugh。Thedirtygatewaywiththewindandrainwhistlingthroughit,andthebasketofmuddypotatoeswaitingtobespiltagainortakenup,neverseemedthecommonholeitreallywas,whenhelookedbacktoitbytheselights。Never,never!
Theywereveryneartheendoftheirwalk,andtheynowcameoutofthegatewaytofinishit。NothingwouldserveMaggybutthattheymuststopatagrocer’swindow,shortoftheirdestination,forhertoshowherlearning。Shecouldreadafterasort;andpickedoutthefatfiguresintheticketsofprices,forthemostpartcorrectly。Shealsostumbled,withalargebalanceofsuccessagainstherfailures,throughvariousphilanthropicrecommendationstoTryourMixture,TryourFamilyBlack,TryourOrange-flavouredPekoe,challengingcompetitionattheheadofFloweryTeas;andvariouscautionstothepublicagainstspuriousestablishmentsandadulteratedarticles。WhenhesawhowpleasurebroughtarosytintintoLittleDorrit’sfacewhenMaggymadeahit,hefeltthathecouldhavestoodtheremakingalibraryofthegrocer’swindowuntiltherainandwindweretired。
Thecourt-yardreceivedthematlast,andtherehesaidgoodbyetoLittleDorrit。Littleasshehadalwayslooked,shelookedlessthaneverwhenhesawhergoingintotheMarshalsealodgepassage,thelittlemotherattendedbyherbigchild。
Thecagedooropened,andwhenthesmallbird,rearedincaptivity,hadtamelyflutteredin,hesawitshutagain;andthenhecameaway。
ContainingthewholeScienceofGovernmentTheCircumlocutionOfficewasaseverybodyknowswithoutbeingtoldthemostimportantDepartmentunderGovernment。NopublicbusinessofanykindcouldpossiblybedoneatanytimewithouttheacquiescenceoftheCircumlocutionOffice。Itsfingerwasinthelargestpublicpie,andinthesmallestpublictart。ItwasequallyimpossibletodotheplainestrightandtoundotheplainestwrongwithouttheexpressauthorityoftheCircumlocutionOffice。IfanotherGunpowderPlothadbeendiscoveredhalfanhourbeforethelightingofthematch,nobodywouldhavebeenjustifiedinsavingtheparliamentuntiltherehadbeenhalfascoreofboards,halfabushelofminutes,severalsacksofofficialmemoranda,andafamily-vaultfullofungrammaticalcorrespondence,onthepartoftheCircumlocutionOffice。
Thisgloriousestablishmenthadbeenearlyinthefield,whentheonesublimeprincipleinvolvingthedifficultartofgoverningacountry,wasfirstdistinctlyrevealedtostatesmen。Ithadbeenforemosttostudythatbrightrevelationandtocarryitsshininginfluencethroughthewholeoftheofficialproceedings。Whateverwasrequiredtobedone,theCircumlocutionOfficewasbeforehandwithallthepublicdepartmentsintheartofperceiving——HOWNOT
Throughthisdelicateperception,throughthetactwithwhichitinvariablyseizedit,andthroughthegeniuswithwhichitalwaysactedonit,theCircumlocutionOfficehadrisentoovertopallthepublicdepartments;andthepublicconditionhadrisentobe——whatitwas。
ItistruethatHownottodoitwasthegreatstudyandobjectofallpublicdepartmentsandprofessionalpoliticiansallroundtheCircumlocutionOffice。Itistruethateverynewpremierandeverynewgovernment,cominginbecausetheyhadupheldacertainthingasnecessarytobedone,werenosoonercomeinthantheyappliedtheirutmostfacultiestodiscoveringHownottodoit。Itistruethatfromthemomentwhenageneralelectionwasover,everyreturnedmanwhohadbeenravingonhustingsbecauseithadn’tbeendone,andwhohadbeenaskingthefriendsofthehonourablegentlemanintheoppositeinterestonpainofimpeachmenttotellhimwhyithadn’tbeendone,andwhohadbeenassertingthatitmustbedone,andwhohadbeenpledginghimselfthatitshouldbedone,begantodevise,Howitwasnottobedone。ItistruethatthedebatesofbothHousesofParliamentthewholesessionthrough,uniformlytendedtotheprotracteddeliberation,Hownottodoit。
Itistruethattheroyalspeechattheopeningofsuchsessionvirtuallysaid,Mylordsandgentlemen,youhaveaconsiderablestrokeofworktodo,andyouwillpleasetoretiretoyourrespectivechambers,anddiscuss,Hownottodoit。Itistruethattheroyalspeech,atthecloseofsuchsession,virtuallysaid,Mylordsandgentlemen,youhavethroughseverallaboriousmonthsbeenconsideringwithgreatloyaltyandpatriotism,Hownottodoit,andyouhavefoundout;andwiththeblessingofProvidenceupontheharvestnatural,notpolitical,Inowdismissyou。Allthisistrue,buttheCircumlocutionOfficewentbeyondit。
BecausetheCircumlocutionOfficewentonmechanically,everyday,keepingthiswonderful,all-sufficientwheelofstatesmanship,Hownottodoit,inmotion。BecausetheCircumlocutionOfficewasdownuponanyill-advisedpublicservantwhowasgoingtodoit,orwhoappearedtobebyanysurprisingaccidentinremotedangerofdoingit,withaminute,andamemorandum,andaletterofinstructionsthatextinguishedhim。ItwasthisspiritofnationalefficiencyintheCircumlocutionOfficethathadgraduallyledtoitshavingsomethingtodowitheverything。Mechanicians,naturalphilosophers,soldiers,sailors,petitioners,memorialists,peoplewithgrievances,peoplewhowantedtopreventgrievances,peoplewhowantedtoredressgrievances,jobbingpeople,jobbedpeople,peoplewhocouldn’tgetrewardedformerit,andpeoplewhocouldn’tgetpunishedfordemerit,wereallindiscriminatelytuckedupunderthefoolscappaperoftheCircumlocutionOffice。
NumbersofpeoplewerelostintheCircumlocutionOffice。
Unfortunateswithwrongs,orwithprojectsforthegeneralwelfareandtheyhadbetterhavehadwrongsatfirst,thanhavetakenthatbitterEnglishrecipeforcertainlygettingthem,whoinslowlapseoftimeandagonyhadpassedsafelythroughotherpublicdepartments;who,accordingtorule,hadbeenbulliedinthis,over-reachedbythat,andevadedbytheother;gotreferredatlasttotheCircumlocutionOffice,andneverreappearedinthelightofday。Boardssatuponthem,secretariesminuteduponthem,commissionersgabbledaboutthem,clerksregistered,entered,checked,andtickedthemoff,andtheymeltedaway。Inshort,allthebusinessofthecountrywentthroughtheCircumlocutionOffice,exceptthebusinessthatnevercameoutofit;anditsnamewasLegion。
Sometimes,angryspiritsattackedtheCircumlocutionOffice。
Sometimes,parliamentaryquestionswereaskedaboutit,andevenparliamentarymotionsmadeorthreatenedaboutitbydemagoguessolowandignorantastoholdthattherealrecipeofgovernmentwas,Howtodoit。Thenwouldthenoblelord,orrighthonourablegentleman,inwhosedepartmentitwastodefendtheCircumlocutionOffice,putanorangeinhispocket,andmakearegularfield-dayoftheoccasion。Thenwouldhecomedowntothathousewithaslapuponthetable,andmeetthehonourablegentlemanfoottofoot。
ThenwouldhebetheretotellthathonourablegentlemanthattheCircumlocutionOfficenotonlywasblamelessinthismatter,butwascommendableinthismatter,wasextollabletotheskiesinthismatter。Thenwouldhebetheretotellthathonourablegentlemanthat,althoughtheCircumlocutionOfficewasinvariablyrightandwhollyright,itneverwassorightasinthismatter。Thenwouldhebetheretotellthathonourablegentlemanthatitwouldhavebeenmoretohishonour,moretohiscredit,moretohisgoodtaste,moretohisgoodsense,moretohalfthedictionaryofcommonplaces,ifhehadlefttheCircumlocutionOfficealone,andneverapproachedthismatter。ThenwouldhekeeponeeyeuponacoachorcrammerfromtheCircumlocutionOfficesittingbelowthebar,andsmashthehonourablegentlemanwiththeCircumlocutionOfficeaccountofthismatter。Andalthoughoneoftwothingsalwayshappened;namely,eitherthattheCircumlocutionOfficehadnothingtosayandsaidit,orthatithadsomethingtosayofwhichthenoblelord,orrighthonourablegentleman,blunderedonehalfandforgottheother;theCircumlocutionOfficewasalwaysvotedimmaculatebyanaccommodatingmajority。
SuchanurseryofstatesmenhadtheDepartmentbecomeinvirtueofalongcareerofthisnature,thatseveralsolemnlordshadattainedthereputationofbeingquiteunearthlyprodigiesofbusiness,solelyfromhavingpractised,Hownottodoit,astheheadoftheCircumlocutionOffice。Astotheminorpriestsandacolytesofthattemple,theresultofallthiswasthattheystooddividedintotwoclasses,and,downtothejuniormessenger,eitherbelievedintheCircumlocutionOfficeasaheaven-borninstitutionthathadanabsoluterighttodowhateveritliked;ortookrefugeintotalinfidelity,andconsidereditaflagrantnuisance。
TheBarnaclefamilyhadforsometimehelpedtoadministertheCircumlocutionOffice。TheTiteBarnacleBranch,indeed,consideredthemselvesinageneralwayashavingvestedrightsinthatdirection,andtookitillifanyotherfamilyhadmuchtosaytoit。TheBarnacleswereaveryhighfamily,andaverylargefamily。Theyweredispersedalloverthepublicoffices,andheldallsortsofpublicplaces。EitherthenationwasunderaloadofobligationtotheBarnacles,ortheBarnacleswereunderaloadofobligationtothenation。Itwasnotquiteunanimouslysettledwhich;theBarnacleshavingtheiropinion,thenationtheirs。
TheMrTiteBarnaclewhoattheperiodnowinquestionusuallycoachedorcrammedthestatesmanattheheadoftheCircumlocutionOffice,whenthatnobleorrighthonourableindividualsatalittleuneasilyinhissaddlebyreasonofsomevagabondmakingatiltathiminanewspaper,wasmoreflushofbloodthanmoney。AsaBarnaclehehadhisplace,whichwasasnugthingenough;andasaBarnaclehehadofcourseputinhissonBarnacleJuniorintheoffice。ButhehadintermarriedwithabranchoftheStiltstalkings,whowerealsobetterendowedinasanguineouspointofviewthanwithrealorpersonalproperty,andofthismarriagetherehadbeenissue,Barnaclejuniorandthreeyoungladies。WhatwiththepatricianrequirementsofBarnaclejunior,thethreeyoungladies,MrsTiteBarnacleneeStiltstalking,andhimself,MrTiteBarnaclefoundtheintervalsbetweenquarterdayandquarterdayratherlongerthanhecouldhavedesired;acircumstancewhichhealwaysattributedtothecountry’sparsimony。
ForMrTiteBarnacle,MrArthurClennammadehisfifthinquiryonedayattheCircumlocutionOffice;havingonpreviousoccasionsawaitedthatgentlemansuccessivelyinahall,aglasscase,awaitingroom,andafire-proofpassagewheretheDepartmentseemedtokeepitswind。OnthisoccasionMrBarnaclewasnotengaged,ashehadbeenbefore,withthenobleprodigyattheheadoftheDepartment;butwasabsent。BarnacleJunior,however,wasannouncedasalesserstar,yetvisibleabovetheofficehorizon。
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