首页 >出版文学> Letters of Two Brides>第23章
  Youneverscrupletousethepowerwhichhislovehasplacedinyourhand。Yourpositionofvantagemaybereadinagesture,alook,atone。Oh!darling,howtrulyareyouthemadwantonyourmothercalledyou!Youdonotquestion,Ifancy,thatIamgreatlyLouis’superior。
  Well,Iwouldaskyou,haveyoueverheardmecontradicthim?AmInotalways,inthepresenceofothers,thewifewhorespectsinhimtheauthorityofthefamily?Hypocrisy!youwillsay。Well,listentome。
  ItistruethatifIwanttogivehimanyadvicewhichIthinkmaybeofusetohim,IwaitforthequietandseclusionofourbedroomtoexplainwhatIthinkandwish;but,Iassureyou,sweetheart,thateventhereIneverarrogatetomyselftheplaceofmentor。IfIdidnotremaininprivatethesamesubmissivewifethatIappeartoothers,hewouldloseconfidenceinhimself。Dear,thegoodwedotoothersisspoiltunlessweeffaceourselvessocompletelythatthosewehelphavenosenseofinferiority。Thereisawonderfulsweetnessinthesehiddensacrifices,andwhatatriumphformeinyourunsuspectingpraisesofLouis!Therecanbenodoubtalsothatthehappiness,thecomfort,thehopeofthelasttwoyearshaverestoredwhatmisfortune,hardship,solitude,anddespondencyhasrobbedhimof。
  This,then,isthesum-totalofmyobservations。AtthepresentmomentyouloveinFelipe,notyourhusband,butyourself。Thereistruthinyourfather’swords;concealedbythespring-flowersofyourpassionliesallthegreatlady’sselfishness。Ah!mychild,howImustloveyoutospeaksuchbittertruths!
  Letmetellyou,ifyouwillpromisenevertobreatheawordofthistotheBaron,theendofourtalk。Wehadbeensingingyourpraisesineverykey,forhesoondiscoveredthatIlovedyoulikeafondly-
  cherishedsister,andhavinginsensiblybroughthimtoaconfidentialmood,Iventuredtosay:
  “Louisehasneveryethadtostrugglewithlife。Shehasbeenthespoiltchildoffortune,andshemightyethavetopayforthiswereyounottheretoactthepartoffatheraswellaslover。“
  “Ah!butisitpossible?……“Hebrokeoffabruptly,likeamanwhoseeshimselfontheedgeofaprecipice。Buttheexclamationwasenoughforme。Nodoubt,ifyouhadstayed,hewouldhavespokenmorefreelylater。
  Mysweet,thinkofthedayawaitingyouwhenyourhusband’sstrengthwillbeexhausted,whenpleasurewillhaveturnedtosatiety,andheseeshimself,Iwillnotsaydegraded,butshornofhisproperdignitybeforeyou。Thestingsofconsciencewillthenwakenasortofremorseinhim,allthemorepainfulforyou,becauseyouwillfeelyourselfresponsible,andyouwillendbydespisingthemanwhomyouhavenotaccustomedyourselftorespect。Remember,too,thatscornwithawomanisonlytheearliestphaseofhatred。Youaretoonobleandgenerous,Iknow,evertoforgetthesacrificeswhichFelipehasmadeforyou;
  butwhatfurthersacrificeswillbeleftforhimtomakewhenhehas,sotospeak,serveduphimselfatthefirstbanquet?Woetotheman,astothewoman,whohasleftnodesireunsatisfied!Allisoverthen。
  Toourshameorourglory——thepointistooniceformetodecide——itisoflovealonethatwomenareinsatiable。
  Oh!Louise,changeyet,whilethereisstilltime。IfyouwouldonlyadoptthesamecoursewithMacumerthatIhavedonewithl’Estorade,youmightrousethesleepinglioninyourhusband,whoismadeofthestuffofheroes。Onemightalmostsaythatyougrudgehimhisgreatness。Wouldyoufeelnoprideinusingyourpowerforotherendsthanyourowngratification,inawakeningthegeniusofagiftedman,asIinraisingtoahigherleveloneofmerelycommonparts?
  Hadyouremainedwithus,Ishouldstillhavewrittenthisletter,forintalkingyoumighthavecutmeshortorgotthebetterofmewithyoursharptongue。ButIknowthatyouwillreadthisthoughtfullyandweighmywarnings。Dearheart,youhaveeverythinginlifetomakeyouhappy,donotspoilyourchances;returntoParis,Ientreatyou,assoonasMacumercomesback。Theengrossingclaimsofsociety,ofwhichIcomplained,arenecessaryforbothofyou;otherwiseyouwouldspendyourlifeinmutualself-absorption。Amarriedwomanoughtnottobetoolavishofherself。Themotherofafamily,whonevergivesherhouseholdanopportunityofmissingher,runstheriskofpallingonthem。IfIhaveseveralchildren,asItrustformyownsakeImay,I
  assureyouIshallmakeapointofreservingtomyselfcertainhourswhichshallbeheldsacred;eventoone’schildrenone’spresenceshouldnotbeamatterofdailybread。
  Farewell,mydearjealoussoul!Doyouknowthatmanywomenwouldbehighlyflatteredathavingrousedthispassingpanginyou?Alas!I
  canonlymourn,forwhatisnotmotherinmeisyourdearfriend。A
  thousandloves。Makewhatexcuseyouwillforleaving;ifyouarenotsureofMacumer,IamofLouis。
  THEBARONNEDEMACUMERTOTHEVICOMTESSEDEL’ESTORADE
  Genoa。
  Mybelovedbeauty,——IwasbittenwiththefancytoseesomethingofItaly,andIamdelightedathavingcarriedoffMacumer,whoseplansinregardtoSardiniaarepostponed。
  Thiscountryissimpleravishing。Thechurches——aboveall,thechapels——haveaseductive,bewitchingair,whichmustmakeeveryfemaleProtestantyearnafterCatholicism。Macumerhasbeenreceivedwithacclamation,andtheyarealldelightedtohavemadeanItalianofsodistinguishedaman。FelipecouldhavetheSardinianembassyatParisifIcaredaboutit,forIammademuchofatcourt。
  Ifyouwrite,addressyourletterstoFlorence。Ihavenottimenowtogointoanydetails,butIwilltellyouthestoryofourtravelswheneveryoucometoParis。Weonlyremainhereaweek,andthengoontoFlorence,takingLeghornontheway。WeshallstayamonthinTuscanyandamonthatNaples,soastoreachRomeinNovember。ThencewereturnhomebyVenice,whereweshallspendthefirstfortnightofDecember,andarriveinParis,/via/MilanandTurin,forJanuary。
  Ourjourneyisaperfecthoneymoon;thesightofnewplacesgivesfreshlifetoourpassion。MacumerdidnotknowItalyatall,andwehavebegunwiththatsplendidCorniceroad,whichmightbetheworkoffairyarchitects。
  Good-bye,darling。Don’tbeangryifIdon’twrite。Itisimpossibletogetaminutetooneselfintraveling;mywholetimeistakenupwithseeing,admiring,andrealizingmyimpressions。Butnotawordtoyouofthesetillmemoryhasgiventhemtheirproperatmosphere。
  THEVICOMTESSEDEL’ESTORADETOTHEBARONNEDEMACUMER
  September。
  Mydear,——ThereislyingforyouatChantepleursafullreplytotheletteryouwrotemefromMarseilles。Thishoneymoonjourney,sofarfromdiminishingthefearsIthereexpressed,makesmebegofyoutogetmylettersentonfromNivernais。
  TheGovernment,itissaid,areresolvedondissolution。ThisisunluckyfortheCrown,sincethelastsessionofthisloyalParliamentwouldhavebeendevotedtothepassingoflaws,essentialtotheconsolidationofitspower;anditisnotlesssoforus,asLouiswillnotbefortytilltheendof1827。Fortunately,however,myfatherhasagreedtostand,andhewillresignhisseatwhentherightmomentarrives。
  Yourgodsonhasfoundouthowtowalkwithouthisgodmother’shelp。Heisaltogetherdelicious,andbeginstomaketheprettiestlittlesignstome,whichbringhometoonethathereisreallyathinkingbeing,notamereanimalorsuckingmachine。Hissmilesarefullofmeaning。
  IhavebeensosuccessfulinmyprofessionofnursethatIshallweanArmandinDecember。Ayearatthebreastisquiteenough;childrenwhoaresuckledlongeraresaidtogrowstupid,andIamallforpopularsayings。
  YoumustmakeatremendoussensationinItaly,myfaironewiththegoldenlocks。Athousandloves。
  THEBARONNEDEMACUMERTOTHEVICOMTESSEDEL’ESTORADE
  Youratrociousletterhasreachedmehere,thestewardhavingforwardeditbymyorders。Oh!Renee……butIwillspareyoutheoutburstofmywoundedfeelings,andsimplytellyoutheeffectyourletterproduced。
  Wehadjustreturnedfromadelightfulreceptiongiveninourhonorbytheambassador,whereIappearedinallmyglory,andMacumerwascompletelycarriedawayinafrenzyoflovewhichIcouldnotdescribe。ThenIreadhimyourhorribleanswertomyletter,andI
  readitsobbing,attheriskofmakingafrightofmyself。MydearArabfellatmyfeet,declaringthatyouraved。Thenhecarriedmeofftothebalconyofthepalacewherewearestaying,fromwhichwehaveaviewoverpartofthecity;therehespoketomewordsworthyofthemagnificentmoonlightscenewhichlaystretchedbeforeus。WebothspeakItaliannow,andhislove,toldinthatvoluptuoustongue,soadmirablyadaptedtotheexpressionofpassion,soundedinmyearslikethemostexquisitepoetry。Hesworethat,evenwereyourightinyourpredictions,hewouldnotexchangeforalifetimeasingleoneofourblessednightsorcharmingmornings。Atthisreckoninghehasalreadylivedathousandyears。Heiscontenttohavemeforhismistress,andwouldclaimnoothertitlethanthatoflover。Soproudandpleasedishetoseehimselfeverydaythechosenofmyheart,thatwereHeaventoofferhimthealternativebetweenlivingasyouwouldhaveustoforanotherthirtyyearswithfivechildren,andfiveyearsspentamidthedearrosesofourlove,hewouldnothesitate。Hewouldtakemylove,suchasitis,anddeath。
  Whilehewaswhisperingthisinmyear,hisarmroundme,myheadrestingonhisshoulder,thecriesofabat,surprisedbyanowl,disturbedus。Thisdeath-crystruckmewithsuchterrorthatFelipecarriedmehalf-faintingtomybed。Butdon’tbealarmed!Thoughthisauguryofevilstillresoundsinmysoul,Iamquitemyselfthismorning。AssoonasIwasup,IwenttoFelipe,and,kneelingbeforehim,myeyesfixedonhis,hishandsclaspedinmine,Isaidtohim:——
  “Mylove,Iamachild,andReneemayberightafterall。ItmaybeonlyyourlovethatIloveinyou;butatleastIcanassureyouthatthisistheonefeelingofmyheart,andthatIloveyouasitisgivenmetolove。Butiftherebeaughtinme,inmylightestthoughtordeed,whichjarsonyourwishesorconceptionofme,Iimploreyoutotellme,tosaywhatitis。Itwillbeajoytometohearyouandtotakeyoureyesastheguiding-starsofmylife。Reneehasfrightenedme,forsheisatruefriend。“
  Macumercouldnotfindvoicetoreply,tearschokedhim。
  Icanthankyounow,Renee。ButforyourletterIshouldnothaveknownthedepthsofloveinmynoble,kinglyMacumer。Romeisthecityoflove;itistherethatpassionshouldcelebrateitsfeast,withartandreligionasconfederates。
  AtVeniceweshallfindtheDucandDuchessedeSoria。Ifyouwrite,addressnowtoParis,forweshallleaveRomeinthreedays。Theambassador’swasafarewellparty。
  P。S——Dear,sillychild,yourletteronlyshowsthatyouknewnothingoflove,excepttheoretically。Learnthenthatloveisaquickeningforcewhichmayproducefruitssodiversethatnotheorycanembraceorco-ordinatethem。AwordthisformylittleProfessorwithherarmorofstays。