feelforyourcharmbothofbodyandmind。Thereisinyouararecombinationoftheideal,thepractical,andthebewitchingwhichsatisfiesalikejudgment,ahusband’spride,desire,andhope,andwhichextendstheboundariesoflovebeyondthoseoflifeitself。
Oh!mylovedone,maythegeniusofloveremainfaithfultome,andthefuturebefullofthosedelightsbymeansofwhichyouhaveglorifiedallthatsurroundsme!Ilongforthedaywhichshallmakeyouamother,thatImayseeyoucontentwiththefulnessofyourlife,mayhearyou,inthesweetvoiceIloveandwiththethoughts,blessthelovewhichhasrefreshedmysoulandgivennewvigortomypowers,thelovewhichismypride,andwhenceIhavedrawn,asfromamagicfountain,freshlife。Yes,I
shallbeallthatyouwouldhaveme。Ishalltakealeadingpartinthepubliclifeofthedistrict,andonyoushallfalltheraysofaglorywhichwilloweitsexistencetothedesireofpleasingyou。“
Somuchformypupil,dear!Doyousupposehecouldhavewrittenlikethisbefore?Ayearhencehisstylewillhavestillfurtherimproved。
Louisisnowinhisfirsttransport;whatIlookforwardtoistheuniformandcontinuoussensationofcontentwhichoughttobethefruitofahappymarriage,whenamanandwoman,inperfecttrustandmutualknowledge,havesolvedtheproblemofgivingvarietytotheinfinite。Thisisthetasksetbeforeeverytruewife;theanswerbeginstodawnonme,andIshallnotresttillIhavemadeitmine。
Youseethathefancieshimself——vanityofmen!——thechosenofmyheart,justasthoughtherewerenolegalbonds。Nevertheless,Ihavenotyetgotbeyondthatexternalattractionwhichgivesusstrengthtoputupwithagooddeal。YetLouisislovable;histemperiswonderfullyeven,andheperforms,asamatterofcourse,actsonwhichmostmenwouldplumethemselves。Inshort,ifIdonotlovehim,Ishallfindnodifficultyinbeinggoodtohim。
Soherearemyblackhairandmyblackeyes——whoselashesact,accordingtoyou,likeVenetianblinds——mycommandingair,andmywholeperson,raisedtotherankofsovereignpower!Tenyearshence,dear,whyshouldwenotbothbelaughingandgayinyourParis,whenceIshallcarryyouoffnowandagaintomybeautifuloasisinProvence?
Oh!Louise,don’tspoilthesplendidfuturewhichawaitsusboth!
Don’tdothemadthingswithwhichyouthreatenme。Myhusbandisayoungman,prematurelyold;whydon’tyoumarrysomeyoung-heartedgraybeardintheChamberofPeers?Thereliesyourvocation。
THEDUCDESORIATOTHEBARONDEMACUMER
MADRID。
MYDEARBROTHER,——YoudidnotmakemeDucdeSoriainorderthatmyactionsshouldbeliethename。HowcouldItoleratemyhappinessifI
knewyoutobeawanderer,deprivedofthecomfortswhichwealtheverywherecommands?NeitherMarienorIwillconsenttomarrytillwehearthatyouhaveacceptedthemoneywhichUrracawillhandovertoyou。ThesetwomillionsarethefruitofyourownsavingsandMarie’s。
Wehavebothprayed,kneelingbeforethesamealtar——andwithwhatearnestness,Godknows!——foryourhappiness。Mydearbrother,itcannotbethattheseprayerswillremainunanswered。Heavenwillsendyouthelovewhichyouseek,tobetheconsolationofyourexile。
Mariereadyourletterwithtears,andisfullofadmirationforyou。
Asforme,Iconsent,notformyownsake,butforthatofthefamily。
TheKingjustifiedyourexpectations。Oh!thatImightavengeyoubylettinghimseehimself,dwarfedbeforethescornwithwhichyouflunghimhistoy,asyoumighttossatigeritsfood。
TheonlythingIhavetakenformyself,dearbrother,ismyhappiness。
IhavetakenMarie。ForthisIshallalwaysbebeholdentoyou,asthecreaturetotheCreator。TherewillbeinmylifeandinMarie’sonedaynotlessgloriousthanourweddingday——itwillbethedaywhenwehearthatyourhearthasfounditsmate,thatawomanlovesyouasyououghttobe,andwouldbe,loved。Donotforgetthatifyouliveforus,wealsoliveforyou。
YoucanwritetouswithperfectconfidenceundercovertotheNuncio,sendingyourletters/via/Rome。TheFrenchambassadoratRomewill,nodoubt,undertaketoforwardthemtoMonsignoreBemboni,attheStateSecretary’soffice,whomourlegatewillhaveadvised。Nootherwaywouldbesafe。Farewell,dearexile,deardespoiledone。Beproudatleastofthehappinesswhichyouhavebroughttous,ifyoucannotbehappyinit。Godwilldoubtlesshearourprayers,whicharefullofyourname。
LOUISEDECHAULIEUTOMME。DEL’ESTORADE
March。
Ah!mylove,marriageismakingaphilosopherofyou!Yourdarlingfacemust,indeed,havebeenjaundicedwhenyouwrotemethoseterribleviewsofhumanlifeandthedutyofwomen。Doyoufancyyouwillconvertmetomatrimonybyyourprogrammeofsubterraneanlabors?
Alas!isthisthentheoutcomeforyouofourtoo-instructeddreams!
WeleftBloisallinnocent,armedwiththepointedshaftsofmeditation,and,lo!theweaponsofthatpurelyidealexperiencehaveturnedagainstyourownbreast!IfIdidnotknowyouforthepurestandmostangelicofcreatedbeings,IdeclareIshouldsaythatyourcalculationssmackofvice。What,mydear,intheinterestofyourcountryhome,yousubmityourpleasurestoaperiodicthinning,asyoudoyourtimber。Oh!ratherletmeperishinalltheviolenceoftheheart’sstormsthanliveinthearidatmosphereofyourcautiousarithmetic!
Asgirls,wewerebothunusuallyenlightened,becauseofthelargeamountofstudywegavetoourchosensubjects;but,mychild,philosophywithoutlove,ordisguisedunderashamlove,isthemosthideousofconjugalhypocrisies。Ishouldimaginethateventhebiggestoffoolsmightdetectnowandagaintheowlofwisdomsquattinginyourbowerofroses——aghastlyphantomsufficienttoputtoflightthemostpromisingofpassions。Youmakeyourownfate,insteadofwaiting,aplaythinginitshands。
Weareeachdevelopinginstrangeways。Alargedoseofphilosophytoagrainofloveisyourrecipe;alargedoseoflovetoagrainofphilosophyismine。Why,Rousseau’sJulie,whomIthoughtsolearned,isamerebeginnertoyou。Woman’svirtue,quotha!Howyouhaveweigheduplife!Alas!Imakefunofyou,and,afterall,perhapsyouareright。
Inonedayyouhavemadeaholocaustofyouryouthandbecomeamiserbeforeyourtime。YourLouiswillbehappy,Idaresay。Ifhelovesyou,ofwhichImakenodoubt,hewillneverfindout,that,forthesakeofyourfamily,youareactingasacourtesandoesformoney;andcertainlymenseemtofindhappinesswiththem,judgingbythefortunestheysquanderthus。Akeen-sightedhusbandmightnodoubtremaininlovewithyou,butwhatsortofgratitudecouldhefeelinthelongrunforawomanwhohadmadeofduplicityasortofmoralarmor,asindispensableasherstays?
Love,dear,isinmyeyesthefirstprincipleofallthevirtues,conformedtothedivinelikeness。Likeallotherfirstprinciples,itisnotamatterofarithmetic;itistheInfiniteinus。Icannotbutthinkyouhavebeentryingtojustifyinyourowneyesthefrightfulpositionofagirl,marriedtoamanforwhomshefeelsnothingmorethanesteem。Youprateofduty,andmakeityourruleandmeasure;butsurelytotakenecessityasthespringofactionisthemoraltheoryofatheism?Tofollowtheimpulseofloveandfeelingisthesecretlawofeverywoman’sheart。Youareactingaman’spart,andyourLouiswillhavetoplaythewoman!
Oh!mydear,yourletterhasplungedmeintoanendlesstrainofthought。Iseenowthattheconventcannevertaketheplaceofmothertoagirl。Ibegofyou,mygrandangelwiththeblackeyes,sopureandproud,soseriousandsopretty,donotturnawayfromthesecries,whichthefirstreadingofyourletterhastornfromme!Ihavetakencomfortinthethoughtthat,whileIwaslamenting,lovewasdoubtlessbusyknockingdownthescaffoldingofreason。
ItmaybethatIshalldoworsethanyouwithoutanyreasoningorcalculations。Passionisanelementinlifeboundtohavealogicnotlesspitilessthanyours。
Monday。
YesterdaynightIplacedmyselfatthewindowasIwasgoingtobed,tolookatthesky,whichwaswonderfullyclear。Thestarswerelikesilvernails,holdingupaveilofblue。InthesilenceofthenightI
couldhearsomeonebreathing,andbythehalf-lightofthestarsI
sawmySpaniard,perchedlikeasquirrelonthebranchesofoneofthetreesliningtheboulevard,anddoubtlesslostinadmirationofmywindows。
Thefirsteffectofthisdiscoverywastomakemewithdrawintotheroom,myfeetandhandsquitelimpandnerveless;but,beneaththefear,Iwasconsciousofadeliciousundercurrentofjoy。Iwasoverpoweredbuthappy。NotoneofthosecleverFrenchmen,whoaspiretomarryme,hashadthebrilliantideaofspendingthenightinanelm-treeattheriskofbeingcarriedoffbythewatch。MySpaniardhas,nodoubt,beenthereforsometime。Ah!hewon’tgivemeanymorelessons,hewantstoreceivethem——well,heshallhaveone。IfonlyheknewwhatIsaidtomyselfabouthissuperficialugliness!Otherscanphilosophizebesidesyou,Renee!Itwashorrid,Iargued,tofallinlovewithahandsomeman。Isitnotpracticallyavowingthatthesensescountforthreepartsoutoffourinapassionwhichoughttobesuper-sensual?
Havinggotovermyfirstalarm,Icranedmyneckbehindthewindowinordertoseehimagain——andwellwasIrewarded!Bymeansofahollowcaneheblewmeinthroughthewindowaletter,cunninglyrolledroundaleadenpellet。
GoodHeavens!willhesupposeIleftthewindowopenonpurpose?
Butwhatwastobedone?Toshutitsuddenlywouldbetomakeoneselfanaccomplice。
Ididbetter。IreturnedtomywindowasthoughIhadseennothingandheardnothingoftheletter,thenIsaidaloud:
“Comeandlookatthestars,Griffith。“
Griffithwassleepingasonlyoldmaidscan。ButtheMoor,hearingme,sliddown,andvanishedwithghostlyrapidity。
Hemusthavebeendyingoffright,andsowasI,forIdidnothearhimgoaway;apparentlyheremainedatthefootoftheelm。Afteragoodquarterofanhour,duringwhichIlostmyselfincontemplationoftheheavens,andbattledwiththewavesofcuriosity,Iclosedmywidowandsatdownonthebedtounfoldthedelicatebitofpaper,withthetendertouchofaworkeramongsttheancientmanuscriptsatNaples。Itfeltredhottomyfingers。“Whatahorriblepowerthismanhasoverme!“Isaidtomyself。
AllatonceIheldoutthepapertothecandle——Iwouldburnitwithoutreadingaword。Thenathoughtstayedme,“Whatcanhehavetosaythathewritessosecretly?“Well,dear,I/did/burnit,reflectingthat,thoughanyothergirlintheworldwouldhavedevouredtheletter,itwasnotfittingthatI——Armande-Louise-MariedeChaulieu——shouldreadit。
Thenextday,attheItalianopera,hewasathispost。ButIfeelsurethat,ex-primeministerofaconstitutionalgovernmentthoughheis,hecouldnotdiscovertheslightestagitationofmindinanymovementofmine。Imighthaveseennothingandreceivednothingtheeveningbefore。Thiswasmostsatisfactorytome,buthelookedverysad。Poorman!inSpainitissonaturalforlovetocomeinatthewindow!
Duringtheinterval,itseems,hecameandwalkedinthepassages。
ThisIlearnedfromthechiefsecretaryoftheSpanishembassy,whoalsotoldthestoryofanobleactionofhis。
AsDucdeSoriahewastomarryoneoftherichestheiressesinSpain,theyoungprincessMarieHeredia,whosewealthwouldhavemitigatedthebitternessofexile。ButitseemsthatMarie,disappointingthewishesofthefathers,whohadbetrothedthemintheirearliestchildhood,lovedtheyoungersonofthehouseofSoria,towhommyFelipe,gaveherup。AllowinghimselftobedespoiledbytheKingofSpain。
“Hewouldperformthispieceofheroismquitesimply,“Isaidtotheyoungman。
“Youknowhimthen?“washisingenuousreply。
Mymothersmiled。
“Whatwillbecomeofhim,forheiscondemnedtodeath?“Iasked。
“ThoughdeadtoSpain,hecanliveinSardinia。“
“Ah!thenSpainisthecountryoftombsaswellascastles?“Isaid,tryingtocarryitoffasajoke。
“ThereiseverythinginSpain,evenSpaniardsoftheoldschool,“mymotherreplied。
“TheBarondeMacumerobtainedapassport,notwithoutdifficulty,fromtheKingofSardinia,“theyoungdiplomatistwenton。“HehasnowbecomeaSardiniansubject,andhepossessesamagnificentestateintheislandwithfullfeudalrights。HehasapalaceatSassari。IfFerdinandVII。weretodie,Macumerwouldprobablygoinfordiplomacy,andtheCourtofTurinwouldmakehimambassador。Thoughyoung,heis-