首页 >出版文学> Lavengro>第28章

第28章

  THEeldestson!Theregardandaffectionwhichmyfatherentertainedforhisfirst-bornwerenaturalenough,andappearedtononemoresothanmyself,whocherishedthesamefeelingstowardshim。Whathewasasaboythereaderalreadyknows,forthereaderhasseenhimasaboy;fainwouldIdescribehimatthetimeofwhichIamnowspeaking,whenhehadattainedthevergeofmanhood,butthepenfailsme,andIattemptnotthetask;andyetitoughttobeaneasyone,forhowfrequentlydoeshisformvisitmymind’seyeinslumberandinwakefulness,inthelightofdayandinthenightwatches;butlastnightIsawhiminhisbeautyandhisstrength;hewasabouttospeak,andmyearwasonthestretch,whenatonceIawoke,andtherewasIalone,andthenightstormwashowlingamidstthebranchesofthepineswhichsurroundmylonelydwelling:’Listentothemoaningofthepine,atwhoserootthyhutisfastened,’-asayingthat,ofwildFinland,inwhichthereiswisdom;Ilistenedandthoughtoflifeanddeath……OfallhumanbeingsthatIhaveeverknown,thatelderbrotherwasthemostfrankandgenerous,ay,andthequickestandreadiest,andthebestadaptedtodoagreatthingneedfulatthecriticaltime,whenthedelayofamomentwouldbefatal。Ihaveknownhimdashfromasteepbankintoastreaminhisfulldress,andpulloutamanwhowasdrowning;yetthereweretwentyothersbathinginthewater,whomighthavesavedhimbyputtingoutahand,withoutinconveniencetothemselves,which,however,theydidnotdo,butstaredwithstupidsurpriseatthedrowningone’sstruggles。Yes,whilstsomeshoutedfromthebanktothoseinthewatertosavethedrowningone,andthoseinthewaterdidnothing,mybrotherneithershoutednorstoodstill,butdashedfromthebankanddidtheonethingneedful,which,undersuchcircumstances,notonemaninamillionwouldhavedone。Now,whocanwonderthatabraveoldmanshouldloveasonlikethis,andpreferhimtoanyother?
  ’Myboy,myownboy,youaretheveryimageofmyself,thedayI
  tookoffmycoatintheparktofightBigBen,’saidmyfather,onmeetinghissonwetanddripping,immediatelyafterhisboldfeat。
  Andwhocannotexcusethehonestprideoftheoldman-thestoutoldman?
  Ay,oldman,thatsonwasworthyofthee,andthouwastworthyofsuchason;anoblespecimenwastthouofthosestrongsingle-
  mindedEnglishmen,who,withoutmakingaparadeeitherofreligionorloyalty,fearedGodandhonouredtheirking,andwerenotparticularlyfriendlytotheFrench,whosevauntingpollstheyoccasionallybroke,asatMindenandatMalplaquet,totheconfusionvastoftheeternalfoesoftheEnglishland。I,whowassolittleliketheethatthouunderstoodstmenot,andinwhomwithjusticethoudidstfeelsolittlepride,hadyetperceptionenoughtoseeallthyworth,andtofeelitanhonourtobeabletocallmyselfthyson;andifatsomenodistanttime,whentheforeignenemyventurestoinsultourshore,Ibepermittedtobreaksomevauntingpoll,itwillbeatriumphtometothinkthat,ifthouhadstlived,thouwouldsthavehailedthedeed,andmightestyetdiscoversomedistantresemblancetothyself,thedaywhenthoudidstallbutvanquishthemightyBrain。
  Ihavealreadyspokenofmybrother’stasteforpainting,andtheprogresshehadmadeinthatbeautifulart。Itisprobablethat,ifcircumstanceshadnoteventuallydivertedhismindfromthepursuit,hewouldhaveattainedexcellence,andleftbehindhimsomeenduringmonumentofhispowers,forhehadanimaginationtoconceive,andthatyetrarerendowment,ahandcapableofgivinglife,body,andrealitytotheconceptionsofhismind;perhapshewantedonething,thewantofwhichisbuttoooftenfataltothesonsofgenius,andwithoutwhichgeniusislittlemorethanasplendidtoyinthehandsofthepossessor-perseverance,doggedperseverance,inhispropercalling;otherwise,thoughthegravehadclosedoverhim,hemightstillbelivingintheadmirationofhisfellow-creatures。Oyegiftedones,followyourcalling,for,howevervariousyourtalentsmaybe,yecanhavebutonecallingcapableofleadingyetoeminenceandrenown;followresolutelytheonestraightpathbeforeyou,itisthatofyourgoodangel,letneitherobstaclesnortemptationsinduceyetoleaveit;boundalongifyoucan;ifnot,onhandsandkneesfollowit,perishinit,ifneedful;butyeneednotfearthat;nooneeveryetdiedinthetruepathofhiscallingbeforehehadattainedthepinnacle。
  Turnintootherpaths,andforamomentaryadvantageorgratificationyehavesoldyourinheritance,yourimmortality。Yewillneverbeheardofafterdeath。
  ’Myfatherhasgivenmeahundredandfiftypounds,’saidmybrothertomeonemorning,’andsomethingwhichisbetter-hisblessing。Iamgoingtoleaveyou。’
  ’Andwhereareyougoing?’
  ’Where?tothegreatcity;toLondon,tobesure。’
  ’Ishouldliketogowithyou。’
  ’Pooh,’saidmybrother,’whatshouldyoudothere?Butdon’tbediscouraged,IdaresayatimewillcomewhenyoutoowillgotoLondon。’
  And,sureenough,soitdid,andallbuttoosoon。
  ’Andwhatdoyoupurposedoingthere?’Idemanded。
  ’Oh,Igotoimprovemyselfinart,toplacemyselfundersomemasterofhighname,atleastIhopetodosoeventually。Ihave,however,aplaninmyhead,whichIshouldwishfirsttoexecute;
  indeed,IdonotthinkIcanresttillIhavedoneso;everyonetalkssomuchaboutItaly,andthewondrousartistswhichithasproduced,andthewondrouspictureswhicharetobefoundthere;
  nowIwishtoseeItaly,orratherRome,thegreatcity,forIamtoldthatinacertainroomthereiscontainedthegrandmiracleofart。’
  ’Andwhatdoyoucallit?’
  ’TheTransfiguration,paintedbyoneRafael,anditissaidtobethegreatestworkofthegreatestpainterwhomtheworldhaseverknown。Isupposeitisbecauseeverybodysaysso,thatIhavesuchastrangedesiretoseeit。Ihavealreadymademyselfwellacquaintedwithitslocality,andthinkthatIcouldalmostfindmywaytoitblindfold。WhenIhavecrossedtheTiber,which,asyouareaware,runsthroughRome,Imustpresentlyturntotheright,uparathershabbystreet,whichcommunicateswithalargesquare,thefartherendofwhichisentirelyoccupiedbythefrontofanimmensechurch,withadomewhichascendsalmosttotheclouds,andthischurchtheycallSt。Peter’s。’
  ’Ay,ay,’saidI,’IhavereadaboutthatinKeysler’sTravels。’
  ’Beforethechurch,inthesquare,aretwofountains,oneoneitherside,castingupwaterinshowers;betweenthem,inthemidst,isanobelisk,broughtfromEgypt,andcoveredwithmysteriouswriting;onyourrightrisesanedifice,notbeautifulnorgrand,buthugeandbulky,wherelivesastrangekindofpriestwhommencallthePope,averyhorribleoldindividual,whowouldfainkeepChristinleadingstrings,callstheVirginMarytheQueenofHeaven,andhimselfGod’sLieutenant-Generaluponearth。’
  ’Ay,ay,’saidI,’IhavereadofhiminFoxe’sBOOKOFMARTYRS。’
  ’Well,Idonotgostraightforwarduptheflightofstepsconductingintothechurch,butIturntotheright,and,passingunderthepiazza,findmyselfinacourtofthehugebulkyhouse;
  andthenascendvariousstaircases,andpassalongvariouscorridorsandgalleries,allofwhichIcoulddescribetoyou,thoughIhaveneverseenthem;atlastadoorisunlocked,andweenteraroomratherhigh,butnotparticularlylarge,communicatingwithanotherroom,intowhich,however,Idonotgo,thoughtherearenoblethingsinthatsecondroom-immortalthings,byimmortalartists;amongstothers,agrandpieceofCorreggio;Idonotenterit,forthegrandpictureoftheworldisnotthere;butIstandstillimmediatelyonenteringthefirstroom,andIlookstraightbeforeme,neithertotherightnorleft,thoughtherearenoblethingsbothontherightandleft,forimmediatelybeforemeatthefartherend,hangingagainstthewall,isapicturewhicharrestsme,andIcanseenothingelse,forthatpictureatthefartherendhangingagainstthewallisthepictureoftheworld……’
  Yes,gothyway,youngenthusiast,and,whethertoLondontownortooldRome,maysuccessattendthee;yetstrangefearsassailmeandmisgivingsonthyaccount。Thoucanstnotrest,thousay’st,tillthouhastseenthepictureinthechamberatoldRomehangingoveragainstthewall;ay,andthusthoudustexemplifythyweakness-thystrengthtoo,itmaybe-fortheoneidea,fantasticyetlovely,whichnowpossessesthee,couldonlyhaveoriginatedinagenialandferventbrain。Well,go,ifthoumustgo;yetitperhapswerebetterfortheetobideinthynativeland,andthere,withfearandtrembling,withgroanings,withstrainingeyeballs,toil,drudge,slave,tillthouhastmadeexcellencethineown;thouwiltscarcelyacquireitbystaringatthepictureoveragainstthedoorinthehighchamberofoldRome。Seekestthouinspiration?thouneedestitnot,thouhastitalready;anditwasneveryetfoundbycrossingthesea。WhathastthoutodowitholdRome,andthouanEnglishman?’Didthybloodneverglowatthementionofthynativeland?’asanartistmerely?Yes,Itrow,andwithreason,forthynativelandneednotgrudgeoldRomeher’picturesoftheworld’;shehaspicturesofherown,’picturesofEngland’;andisitanewthingtotossupcapsandshout-Englandagainsttheworld?Yes,againsttheworldinall,inall;inscienceandinarms,inminstrelstrain,andnotlessintheart’whichenablesthehandtodeceivetheintoxicatedsoulbymeansofpictures。’Seek’stmodels?toGainsboroughandHogarthturn,notnamesoftheworld,maybe,butEnglishnames-andEnglandagainsttheworld!Alivingmaster?why,therehecomes!thouhasthadhimlong,hehaslongguidedthyyounghandtowardstheexcellencewhichisyetfarfromthee,butwhichthoucanstattainifthoushouldstpersistandwrestle,evenashehasdone,’midstgloomanddespondency-ay,andevencontempt;hewhonowcomesupthecreakingstairtothylittlestudiointhesecondfloortoinspectthylasteffortbeforethoudepartest,thelittlestoutmanwhosefaceisverydark,andwhoseeyeisvivacious;thatmanhasattainedexcellence,destinedsomedaytobeacknowledged,thoughnottillheiscold,andhismortalpartreturnedtoitskindredclay。Hehaspainted,notpicturesoftheworld,butEnglishpictures,suchasGainsboroughhimselfmighthavedone;beautifulruralpieces,withtreeswhichmightwelltemptthewildbirdstoperchuponthem,thouneedestnotruntoRome,brother,wherelivestheoldMariolater,afterpicturesoftheworld,whilstathometherearepicturesofEngland;norneedestthouevengotoLondon,thebigcity,insearchofamaster,forthouhastoneathomeintheoldEastAngliantownwhocaninstructtheewhilstthouneedestinstruction:betterstayathome,brother,atleastforaseason,andtoilandstrive’midstgroaningsanddespondencytillthouhastattainedexcellenceevenashehasdone-thelittledarkmanwiththebrowncoatandthetop-boots,whosenamewillonedaybeconsideredthechiefornamentoftheoldtown,andwhoseworkswillatnodistantperiodrankamongsttheproudestpicturesofEngland-andEnglandagainsttheworld!-thymaster,mybrother,thy,atpresent,alltoolittleconsideredmaster-Crome。