首页 >出版文学> Man and Wife>第132章

第132章

  “Monday,thereweretheoddjobsaboutthehousetobebegun。Hewasbythistimejustsoberenoughtodohiswork,andjusttipsyenoughtotakeaspitefulpleasureinpersecutinghiswife。Hewentoutandgotthethingshewanted,andcamebackandcalledforme。Askilledworkmanlikehewashesaidwantedajourneymanunderhim。Therewerethingswhichitwasbeneathaskilledworkmantodoforhimself。Hewasnotgoingtocallinamanoraboy,andthenhavetopaythem。Hewasgoingtogetitdonefornothing,andhemeanttomakeajourneymanof_me。_Halftipsyandhalfsober,hewentontalkinglikethat,andlayingouthisthings,allquiteright,ashewantedthem。Whentheywerereadyhestraightenedhimselfup,andhegavemehisorderswhatIwastodo。
  “Iobeyedhimtothebestofmyability。Whateverhesaid,andwhateverhedid,Iknewhewasgoingasstraightasmancouldgotohisowndeathbymyhands。
  “Theratsandmicewerealloverthehouse,andtheplacegenerallywasoutofrepair。Heoughttohavebegunonthekitchen-floor;buthavingsentencepronouncedagainsthimhebeganintheemptyparlorsontheground-floor。
  “Theseparlorswereseparatedbywhatiscalleda’lath-and-plasterwall。’Theratshaddamagedit。Atoneparttheyhadgnawedthroughandspoiledthepaper,atanotherparttheyhadnotgotsofar。Thelandlord’sordersweretosparethepaper,becausehehadsomebyhimtomatchit。Myhusbandbeganataplacewherethepaperwaswhole。UnderhisdirectionsI
  mixedup——Iwon’tsaywhat。Withthehelpofithegotthepaperloosefromthewall,withoutinjuringitinanyway,inalonghangingstrip。Underitwastheplasterandthelaths,gnawedawayinplacesbytherats。Thoughstrictlyapaperhangerbytrade,hecouldbeplasterertoowhenheliked。Isawhowhecutawaytherottenlathsandrippedofftheplaster;andunderhisdirectionsagainImixedupthenewplasterhewanted,andhandedhimthenewlaths,andsawhowhesetthem。Iwon’tsayawordabouthowthiswasdoneeither。
  “Ihaveareasonforkeepingsilencehere,whichis,tomymind,averydreadfulone。Ineverythingthatmyhusbandmademedothatdayhewasshowingmeblindfoldthewaytokillhim,sothatnolivingsoul,inthepoliceoroutofit,couldsuspectmeofthedeed。
  “Wefinishedthejobonthewalljustbeforedark。Iwenttomycupoftea,andhewenttohisbottleofgin。
  “Ilefthim,drinkinghard,toputourtwobedroomstidyforthenight。TheplacethathisbedhappenedtobesetinwhichIhadneverremarkedparticularlybeforeseemed,inamannerofspeaking,toforceitselfonmynoticenow。
  “Theheadofthebedsteadwassetagainstthewallwhichdividedhisroomfrommine。FromlookingatthebedsteadIgottolookingatthewallnext。Thentowonderingwhatitwasmadeof。Thentorappingagainstitwithmyknuckles。Thesoundtoldmetherewasnothingbutlathandplasterunderthepaper。Itwasthesameasthewallwehadbeenatworkondownstairs。Wehadclearedourwaysofarthroughthislast——incertainplaceswheretherepairsweremostneeded——thatwehadtobecarefulnottoburstthroughthepaperintheroomontheotherside。Ifoundmyselfcallingtomindthecautionmyhusbandhadgivenmewhilewewereatthispartofthework,wordforwordashehadspokenit。_’Takecareyoudon’tfindyourhandsinthenextroom。’_Thatwaswhathehadsaiddownintheparlor。UpinhisbedroomIkeptonrepeatingitinmyownmind——withmyeyesallthewhileonthekey,whichhehadmovedtotheinnersideofthedoortolockhimselfin——tilltheknowledgeofwhatitmeantburstonmelikeaflashoflight。Ilookedatthewall,atthebedhead,atmyowntwohands——andIshiveredasifitwaswintertime。
  “HoursmusthavepassedlikeminuteswhileIwasupstairsthatnight。Ilostallcountoftime。Whenmyhusbandcameupfromhisdrinking,hefoundmeinhisroom。
  “Ileavetherestuntold,andpassonpurposelytothenextmorning。
  “Nomortaleyesbutminewilleverseetheselines。Still,therearethingsawomancan’twriteofeventoherself。Ishallonlysaythis。Isufferedthelastandworstofmanyindignitiesatmyhusband’shands——attheverytimewhenIfirstsaw,setplainlybeforeme,thewaytotakehislife。Hewentouttowardnoonnextday,togohisroundsamongthepublichouses;mymindbeingthenstrunguptodelivermyselffromhim,forgoodandall,whenhecamebackatnight。
  “Thethingswehadusedonthepreviousdaywereleftintheparlor。Iwasallbymyselfinthehouse,freetoputinpracticethelessonhehadtaughtme。Iprovedmyselfanaptscholar。
  BeforethelampswerelitinthestreetIhadmyownwaypreparedinmybedroomandinhisforlayingmyownhandsonhim——afterhehadlockedhimselfupforthenight。
  “Idon’trememberfeelingeitherfearordoubtthroughallthosehours。Isatdowntomybitofsupperwithnobetterandnoworseanappetitethanusual。TheonlychangeinmethatIcancalltomindwasthatIfeltasingularlongingtohavesomebodywithmetokeepmecompany。Havingnofriendtoaskin,Iwenttothestreetdoorandstoodlookingatthepeoplepassingthiswayandthat。
  “Astraydog,sniffingabout,cameuptome。GenerallyIdislikedogsandbeastsofallkinds。Icalledthisoneinandgavehimhissupper。HehadbeentaughtIsupposetosituponhishind-legsandbegforfood;atanyrate,thatwashiswayofaskingmeformore。Ilaughed——itseemsimpossiblewhenIlookbackatitnow,butforallthatit’strue——Ilaughedtillthetearsrandownmycheeks,atthelittlebeastonhishaunches,withhisearsprickedupandhisheadononesideandhismouthwateringforthevictuals。IwonderwhetherIwasinmyrightsenses?Idon’tknow。
  “Whenthedoghadgotallhecouldgethewhinedtobeletouttoroamthestreetsagain。
  “AsIopenedthedoortoletthecreaturegohisways,Isawmyhusbandcrossingtheroadtocomein。’Keepout’Isaystohim;
  ’to-night,ofallnights,keepout。’Hewastoodrunktoheedme;
  hepassedby,andblunderedhiswayupstairs。Ifollowedandlistened。Iheardhimopenhisdoor,andbangitto,andlockit。
  Iwaitedabit,andwentupanotherstairortwo。Iheardhimdropdownontohisbed。Inaminutemorehewasfastasleepandsnoring。
  “Ithadallhappenedasitwaswantedtohappen。Intwominutes——withoutdoingonesinglethingtobringsuspiciononmyself——Icouldhavesmotheredhim。Iwentintomyownroom。I
  tookupthetowelthatIhadlaidready。Iwaswithinaninchofit——whentherecamearushofsomethingupintomyhead。Ican’tsaywhatitwas。Icanonlysaythehorrorslaidholdofmeandhuntedmethenandthereoutofthehouse。
  “Iputonmybonnet,andslippedthekeyofthestreetdoorintomypocket。Itwasonlyhalfpastnine——ormaybeaquartertoten。
  IfIhadanyoneclearnotioninmyhead,itwasthenotionofrunningaway,andneverallowingmyselftoseteyesonthehouseorthehusbandmore。
  “Iwentupthestreet——andcameback。Iwentdownthestreet——andcameback。Itrieditathirdtime,andwentroundandroundandround——andcameback。ItwasnottobedoneThehouseheldmechainedtoitlikeadogtohiskennel。Icouldn’tkeepawayfromit。Forthelifeofme,Icouldn’tkeepawayfromit。
  “Acompanyofgayyoungmenandwomenpassedme,justasIwasgoingtoletmyselfinagain。Theywereinagreathurry。’Stepout,’saysoneofthemen;’thetheatre’scloseby,andweshallbejustintimeforthefarce。’Iturnedaboutandfollowedthem。
  Havingbeenpiouslybroughtup,Ihadneverbeeninsideatheatreinmylife。ItstruckmethatImightgettaken,asitwere,outofmyself,ifIsawsomethingthatwasquitestrangetome,andheardsomethingwhichwouldputnewthoughtsintomymind。
  “Theywentintothepit;andIwentinafterthem。
  “Thethingtheycalledthefarcehadbegun。Menandwomencameontothestage,turnandturnabout,andtalked,andwentoffagain。Beforelongallthepeopleaboutmeinthepitwerelaughingandclappingtheirhands。Thenoisetheymadeangeredme。Idon’tknowhowtodescribethestateIwasin。Myeyeswouldn’tserveme,andmyearswouldn’tserveme,toseeandtohearwhattherestofthemwereseeingandhearing。Theremusthavebeensomething,Ifancy,inmymindthatgotitselfbetweenmeandwhatwasgoingonuponthestage。Theplaylookedfairenoughonthesurface;buttherewasdangeranddeathatthebottomofit。Theplayersweretalkingandlaughingtodeceivethepeople——withmurderintheirmindsallthetime。Andnobodyknewitbutme——andmytonguewastiedwhenItriedtotelltheothers。Igotup,andranout。ThemomentIwasinthestreetmystepsturnedbackofthemselvesonthewaytothehouse。Icalledacab,andtoldthemantodriveasfarasashillingwouldtakemetheoppositeway。Heputmedown——Idon’tknowwhere。AcrossthestreetIsawaninscriptioninlettersofflameoveranopendoor。Themansaiditwasadancing-place。Dancingwasasnewtomeasplay-going。Ihadonemoreshillingleft;andIpaidtogoin,andseewhatasightofthedancingwoulddoforme。Thelightfromtheceilingpoureddowninthisplaceasifitwasallonfire。Thecrashingofthemusicwasdreadful。Thewhirlingroundandroundofmenandwomenineachother’sarmswasquitemaddeningtosee。Idon’tknowwhathappenedtomehere。Thegreatblazeoflightfromtheceilingturnedblood-redonasudden。ThemanstandinginfrontofthemusicianswavingasticktookthelikenessofSatan,asseeninthepictureinourfamilyBibleathome。Thewhirlingmenandwomenwentroundandround,withwhitefaceslikethefacesofthedead,andbodiesrobedinwinding-sheets。Iscreamedoutwiththeterrorofit;andsomepersontookmebythearmandputmeoutsidethedoor。Thedarknessdidmegood:itwascomfortinganddelicious——likeacoolhandlaidonahothead。Iwentwalkingonthroughit,withoutknowingwhere;composingmymindwiththebeliefthatI
  hadlostmyway,andthatIshouldfindmyselfmilesdistantfromhomewhenmorningdawned。AftersometimeIgottoowearytogoon;andIsatmedowntorestonadoor-step。Idozedabit,andwokeup。WhenIgotonmyfeettogoonagain,Ihappenedtoturnmyheadtowardthedoorofthehouse。Thenumberonitwasthesamenumberanasours。Ilookedagain。Andbehold,itwasourstepsIhadbeenrestingon。Thedoorwasourdoor。
  “AllmydoubtsandallmystrugglesdroppedoutofmymindwhenI
  madethatdiscovery。Therewasnomistakingwhatthisperpetualcomingbacktothehousemeant。ResistitasImight,itwastobe。
  “Iopenedthestreetdoorandwentupstairs,andheardhimsleepinghisheavysleep,exactlyasIhadheardhimwhenIwentout。Isatdownonmybedandtookoffmybonnet,quitequietinmyself,becauseIknewitwastobe。Idampedthetowel,andputitready,andtookaturnintheroom。
  “Itwasjustthedawnofday。Thesparrowswerechirpingamongthetreesinthesquarehardby。
  “Idrewupmyblind;thefaintlightspoketomeasifinwords,’Doitnow,beforeIgetbrighter,andshowtoomuch。’
  “Ilistened。Thefriendlysilencehadawordformetoo:’Doitnow,andtrustthesecrettoMe。’
  “Iwaitedtillthechurchclockchimedbeforestrikingthehour。
  Atthefirststroke——withouttouchingthelockofhisdoor,withoutsettingfootinhisroom——Ihadthetoweloverhisface。
  Beforethelaststrokehehadceasedstruggling。Whenthehumofthebellthroughthemorningsilencewasstillanddead,_he_wasstillanddeadwithit。