Afteramoment’ssurprise,Craigrosetohisfeet,and,facinghimsquarely,tooktheofferedhandinbothofhisandhelditfastwithoutaword.Graemewasthefirsttospeak,andhisvoicewasdeepwithemotion——
’Youareagreatman,agoodman.I’dgivesomethingtohaveyourgrit.’
PoorCraigstoodlookingathim,notdaringtospeakforsomemoments,thenhesaidquietly——
’Notgoodnorgreat,but,thankGod,notquiteatraitor.’
’Goodman!’wentonGraeme,pattinghimontheshoulder.’Goodman!Butit’stough.’
Craigsatdownquickly,saying,’Don’tdothat,oldchap!’
IwentupwithCraigtoMrs.Mavor’sdoor.Shedidnothearuscoming,butstoodnearthewindowgazingupatthemountains.Shewasdressedinsomerichsoftstuff,andworeatherbreastabunchofwild—flowers.Ihadneverseenhersobeautiful.IdidnotwonderthatCraigpausedwithhisfootuponthethresholdtolookather.Sheturnedandsawus.Withagladcry,’Oh!mydarling;
youhavecometome,’shecamewithoutstretchedarms.Iturnedandfled,butthecryandthevisionwerelongwithme.
ItwasdecidedthatnightthatMrs.Mavorshouldgothenextweek.
Aminerandhiswifeweregoingeast,andItoowouldjointheparty.
Thecampwentintomourningatthenews;butitwasunderstoodthatanydisplayofgriefbeforeMrs.Mavorwasbadform.Shewasnottobeannoyed.
ButwhenIsuggestedthatsheshouldleavequietly,andavoidthepainofsayinggood—bye,sheflatlyrefused——
’Imustsaygood—byetoeveryman.TheylovemeandIlovethem.’
Itwasdecided,too,atfirst,thatthereshouldbenothinginthewayofatestimonial,butwhenCraigfoundoutthatthemenwerecomingtoherwithallsortsofextraordinarygifts,heagreedthatitwouldbebetterthattheyshoulduniteinonegift.SoitwasagreedthatIshouldbuyaringforher.Andwereitnotthatthecontributionswerestrictlylimitedtoonedollar,thepursethatSlavinhandedherwhenShawreadtheaddressatthefarewellsupperwouldhavebeenmanytimesfilledwiththegoldthatwaspresseduponthecommittee.Therewerenospeechesatthesupper,exceptonebymyselfinreplyonMrs.Mavor’sbehalf.Shehadgivenmethewordstosay,andIwasthoroughlyprepared,elseIshouldnothavegotthrough.Ibeganintheusualway:’Mr.Chairman,ladiesandgentlemen,Mrs.Mavoris——’butIgotnofurther,foratthementionofhernamethemenstoodonthechairsandyelleduntiltheycouldyellnomore.Therewereovertwohundredandfiftyofthem,andtheeffectwasoverpowering.ButIgotthroughmyspeech.Irememberitwell.Itbegan——
’Mrs.Mavorisgreatlytouchedbythismarkofyourlove,andshewillwearyourringalwayswithpride.’Anditendedwith——
’Shehasonerequesttomake,thatyouwillbetruetotheLeague,andthatyoustandcloseaboutthemanwhodidmosttomakeit.
Shewishesmetosaythathoweverfarawayshemayhavetogo,sheisleavingherheartinBlackRock,andshecanthinkofnogreaterjoythantocomebacktoyouagain.’
Thentheyhad’TheSweetByandBy,’butthemenwouldnotjoinintherefrain,unwillingtoloseanoteofthegloriousvoicetheylovedtohear.Beforethelastverseshebeckonedtome.IwenttoherstandingbyCraig’ssideasheplayedforher.’Askthemtosing,’sheentreated;’Icannotbearit.’
’Mrs.Mavorwishesyoutosingintherefrain,’Isaid,andatoncethemensatupandclearedtheirthroats.Thesingingwasnotgood,butatthefirstsoundofthehoarsenotesofthemenCraig’sheadwentdownovertheorgan,forhewasthinkingIsupposeofthedaysbeforethemwhentheywouldlonginvainforthatthrillingvoicethatsoaredhighovertheirownhoarsetones.Andafterthevoicesdiedawayhekeptonplayingtill,halfturningtowardhim,shesangaloneoncemoretherefraininavoicelowandsweetandtender,asifforhimalone.Andsohetookit,forhesmiledupatherhisoldsmilefullofcourageandfulloflove.
Thenforonewholehourshestoodsayinggood—byetothoserough,gentle—heartedmenwhoseinspirationtogoodnessshehadbeenforfiveyears.Itwasverywonderfulandveryquiet.Itwasunderstoodthattherewastobenononsense,andAbehadbeenheardtodeclarethathewould’throwoutanycotton—backedfoolwhocouldn’tholdhimselfdown,’andfurther,hehadenjoinedthemtorememberthat’herarmwasn’tapump—handle.’
Atlasttheywereallgone,allbutherguardofhonour——Shaw,VernonWinton,Geordie,Nixon,Abe,Nelson,Craig,andmyself.
Thiswastherealfarewell;for,thoughintheearlylightofthenextmorningtwohundredmenstoodsilentaboutthestage,andthenasitmovedoutwavedtheirhatsandyelledmadly,thiswasthelasttouchtheyhadofherhand.Herplacewasuponthedriver’sseatbetweenAbeandMr.Craig,whoheldlittleMarjorieonhisknee.TherestoftheguardofhonourweretofollowwithGraeme’steam.ItwasWinton’sfinesensethatkeptGraemefromfollowingthemclose.’Lethergooutalone,’hesaid,andsoweheldbackandwatchedhergo.
ShestoodwithherbacktowardsAbe’splungingfour—horseteam,andsteadyingherselfwithonehandonAbe’sshoulder,gazeddownuponus.Herheadwasbare,herlipspartedinasmile,hereyesglowingwiththeirowndeeplight;andso,facingus,erectandsmiling,shedroveaway,wavingusfarewelltillAbeswunghisteamintothecanyonroadandwesawhernomore.Asighshudderedthroughthecrowd,and,withasobinhisvoice,Wintonsaid:’Godhelpusall.’
Iclosemyeyesandseeitallagain.Thewavingcrowdofdark—
facedmen,theplunginghorses,and,highupbesidethedriver,theswaying,smiling,wavingfigure,andaboutallthemountains,framingthepicturewiththeirdarksidesandwhitepeakstippedwiththegoldoftherisingsun.ItisapictureIlovetolookupon,albeititcallsupanotherthatIcanneverseebutthroughtears.
Ilookacrossastripofever—wideningwater,atagroupofmenuponthewharf,standingwithheadsuncovered,everymanahero,thoughnotamanofthemsuspectsit,leastofallthemanwhostandsinfront,strong,resolute,self—conquered.And,gazinglong,IthinkIseehimturnagaintohisplaceamongthemenofthemountains,notforgetting,buteverydayrememberingthegreatlovethatcametohim,andremembering,too,thatloveisnotall.
Itisthenthetearscome.
Butforthatpicturetwoofusatleastarebettermento—day.
CHAPTERXIII
HOWNELSONCAMEHOME
Throughthelongsummerthemountainsandthepineswerewithme.
Andthroughthewinter,too,busyasIwasfillinginmyBlackRocksketchesfortherailwaypeoplewhowouldstillpersistinorderingthembythedozen,thememoryofthatstirringlifewouldcomeoverme,andoncemoreIwouldbeamongthesilentpinesandthemightysnow—peakedmountains.Andbeforemewouldappearthered—shirtedshantymenordark—facedminers,great,free,boldfellows,drivingmealmostmadwiththedesiretoseizeandfixthoseswiftlychanginggroupsofpicturesquefigures.AtsuchtimesIwoulddropmysketch,andwitheagerbrushseizeagroup,aface,afigure,andthatishowmystudiocomestobefilledwiththemenofBlackRock.Theretheyareallaboutme.Graemeandthemenfromthewoods,Sandy,Baptiste,theCampbells,andinmanyattitudesandgroupsoldmanNelson;Craig,too,andhisminers,Shaw,Geordie,Nixon,andpooroldBillyandthekeeperoftheLeaguesaloon.
ItseemedasifIlivedamongthem,andtheillusionwasgreatlyhelpedbythevividlettersGraemesentmefromtimetotime.
BriefnotescamenowandthenfromCraigtoo,towhomIhadsentafaithfulaccountofhowIhadbroughtMrs.Mavortohership,andofhowIhadwatchedhersailawaywithnonetoobraveaface,assheheldupherhandthatboretheminers’ring,andsmiledwiththatdeeplightinhereyes.Ah!thoseeyeshavedrivenmetodespairandmademefearthatIamnogreatpainterafterall,inspiteofwhatmyfriendstellmewhocomeintosmokemygoodcigarsandpraisemybrush.Icangetthebrowandhair,andmouthandpose,buttheeyes!theeyeseludeme——andthefacesofMrs.
Mavoronmywall,thatthemenpraiseandraveover,arenotsuchasIcouldshowtoanyofthemenfromthemountains.
Graeme’sletterstellmechieflyaboutCraigandhisdoings,andaboutoldmanNelson;whilefromCraigIhearaboutGraeme,andhowheandNelsonarestandingathisback,anddoingwhattheycantofillthegapthatnevercanbefilled.Thethreearemuchtogether,Icansee,andIamgladforthemall,butchieflyforCraig,whoseface,grief—strickenbutresolute,andoftengentleasawoman’s,willnotleavemenorletmerestinpeace.
Thenoteofthankshesentmewasentirelycharacteristic.Therewerenoheroics,muchlesspiningorself—pity.Itwassimpleandmanly,notignoringthepainbutmakingmuchofthejoy.Andthentheyhadtheirworktodo.Thatnote,soclear,somanly,sonoblysensible,stiffensmybackyetattimes.
InthespringcamethestartlingnewsthatBlackRockwouldsoonbenomore.TheminesweretoclosedownonApril1.Thecompany,havingalluredtheconfidingpublicwithenticingdescriptionsofmarvellousdrifts,veins,assays,andprospects,andhavingexpendedvastsumsofthepublic’smoneyindevelopingtheminestilltheassuranceoftheirreliabilitywasabsolutelyfinal,calmlyshutdownandvanished.WiththeirvanishingvanishesBlackRock,notwithoutlossandmuchdeepcursingonthepartofthemenbroughtsomehundredsofmilestoaidthecompanyinitsextraordinaryandwhollyinexplicablegame.
PersonallyitgrievedmetothinkthatmyplanofreturningtoBlackRockcouldneverbecarriedout.Itwasagreatcompensation,however,thatthethreemenmostrepresentativetomeofthatlifeweresoontovisitmeactuallyinmyownhomeandden.Graeme’slettersaidthatinonemonththeymightbeexpectedtoappear.AtleastheandNelsonweresoontocome,andCraigwouldsoonfollow.
Onreceivingthegreatnews,IatoncelookedupyoungNelsonandhissister,andweproceededtocelebratethejoyfulprospectwithaspeciallygooddinner.Ifoundthegreatestdelightinpicturingthejoyandprideoftheoldmaninhischildren,whomhehadnotseenforfifteenorsixteenyears.Themotherhaddiedsomefiveyearsbefore,thenthefarmwassold,andthebrotherandsistercameintothecity;andanyfathermightbeproudofthem.Thesonwasawell—madeyoungfellow,handsomeenough,thoughtful,andsolid—looking.Thegirlremindedmeofherfather.Thesameresolutionwasseeninmouthandjaw,andthesamepassionslumberedinthedarkgreyeyes.Shewasnotbeautiful,butshecarriedherselfwell,andonewouldalwayslookathertwice.Itwouldbeworthsomethingtoseethemeetingbetweenfatheranddaughter.
Butfate,thegreatestartistofusall,takeslittlecountofthecarefuldrawingandthebrightcolouringofourfancy’spictures,butwithrudehandderangesall,andwithoneswiftsweeppaintsoutthebrightandpaintsinthedark.Andthistrickheservedmewhen,oneJunenight,afterlongandanxiouswaitingforsomewordfromthewest,mydoorsuddenlyopenedandGraemewalkedinuponmelikeaspectre,greyandvoiceless.Myshoutofwelcomewaschokedbackbythelookinhisface,andIcouldonlygazeathimandwaitforhisword.Hegrippedmyhand,triedtospeak,butfailedtomakewordscome.
’Sitdown,oldman,’Isaid,pushing,himintomychair,’andtakeyourtime.’
Heobeyed,lookingupatmewithburning,sleeplesseyes.Myheartwassoreforhismisery,andIsaid:’Don’tmind,oldchap;itcan’tbesoawfullybad.You’reheresafeandsoundatanyrate,’
andsoIwentontogivehimtime.Butheshudderedandlookedroundandgroaned.
’Nowlookhere,Graeme,let’shaveit.Whendidyoulandhere?
WhereisNelson?Whydidn’tyoubringhimup?’
’Heisatthestationinhiscoffin,’heansweredslowly.
’Inhiscoffin?’Iechoed,mybeautifulpicturesallvanishing.
’Howwasit?’
’Throughmycursedfolly,’hegroanedbitterly.
’Whathappened?’Iasked.Butignoringmyquestion,hesaid:’I
mustseehischildren.Ihavenotsleptforfournights.IhardlyknowwhatIamdoing;butIcan’tresttillIseehischildren.I
promisedhim.Getthemforme.’
’To—morrowwilldo.Gotosleepnow,andweshallarrangeeverythingto—morrow,’Iurged.
’No!’hesaidfiercely;’to—night——now!’
Inhalfanhourtheywerelistening,paleandgrief—stricken,tothestoryoftheirfather’sdeath.
PoorGraemewasrelentlessinhisself—condemnationashetoldhow,throughhis’cursedfolly,’oldNelsonwaskilled.Thethree,Craig,Graeme,andNelson,hadcomeasfarasVictoriatogether.
TheretheyleftCraig,andcameontoSanFrancisco.InanevilhourGraememetacompanionofotherandevildays,anditwasnotlongtilltheoldfevercameuponhim.
InvainNelsonwarnedandpleaded.ThereactionfromthemonotonyandpovertyofcamplifetotheexcitementandluxuryoftheSanFranciscogamingpalacesswungGraemequiteoffhisfeet,andallthatNelsoncoulddowastofollowfromplacetoplaceandkeepwatch.
’Andtherehewouldsit,’saidGraemeinahard,bittervoice,’waitingandwatchingoftentillthegreymorninglight,whilemymadnessheldmefasttothetable.Onenight,’herehepausedamoment,puthisfaceinhishandsandshuddered;butquicklyhewasmasterofhimselfagain,andwentoninthesamehardvoice——’OnenightmypartnerandIwereplayingtwomenwhohaddoneusupbefore.Iknewtheywerecheating,butcouldnotdetectthem.
Gameaftergametheywon,tillIwasfuriousatmystupidityinnotbeingabletocatchthem.HappeningtoglanceatNelsoninthecorner,Icaughtameaninglook,andlookingagain,hethrewmeasignal.Iknewatoncewhatthefraudwas,andnextgamechargedthefellowwithit.Hegavemethelie;Istruckhismouth,butbeforeIcoulddrawmygun,hispartnerhadmebythearms.WhatfollowedIhardlyknow.WhileIwasstrugglingtogetfree,Isawhimreachforhisweapon;but,ashedrewit,Nelsonsprangacrossthetable,andborehimdown.Whentherowwasever,threemenlayonthefloor.OnewasNelson;hetooktheshotmeantforme.’
Againthestorypaused.
’Andthemanthatshothim?’
Istartedattheintensefiercenessinthevoice,and,lookinguponthegirl,sawhereyesblazingwithaterriblelight.
’Heisdead,’answeredGraemeindifferently.
’Youkilledhim?’sheaskedeagerly.
Graemelookedathercuriously,andansweredslowly——
’Ididnotmeanto.Hecameatme.IstruckhimharderthanI
knew.Henevermoved.’
Shedrewasighofsatisfaction,andwaited.
’Igothimtoaprivateward,hadthebestdoctorinthecity,andsentforCraigtoVictoria.Forthreedayswethoughthewouldlive——hewaskeentogethome;butbythetimeCraigcamewehadgivenuphope.Oh,butIwasthankfultoseeCraigcomein,andthejoyintheoldman’seyeswasbeautifultosee.Therewasnopainatlast,andnofear.Hewouldnotallowmetoreproachmyself,sayingoverandover,"Youwouldhavedonethesameforme"——asIwould,fastenough——"anditisbettermethanyou.Iamoldanddone;youwilldomuchgoodyetfortheboys."AndhekeptlookingatmetillIcouldonlypromisetodomybest.
’ButIamgladItoldhimhowmuchgoodhehaddonemeduringthelastyear,forheseemedtothinkthattoogoodtobetrue.AndwhenCraigtoldhimhowhehadhelpedtheboysinthecamp,andhowSandyandBaptisteandtheCampbellswouldalwaysbebettermenforhislifeamongthem,theoldman’sfaceactuallyshone,asiflightwerecomingthrough.Andwithsurpriseandjoyhekeptonsaying,"Doyouthinkso?Doyouthinkso?Perhapsso,perhapsso."AtthelasthetalkedofChristmasnightatthecamp.Youwerethere,youremember.Craighadbeenholdingaservice,andsomethinghappened,Idon’tknowwhat,buttheybothknew.’
’Iknow,’Isaid,andIsawagainthepictureoftheoldmanunderthepine,uponhiskneesinthesnow,withhisfaceturneduptothestars.
’Whateveritwas,itwasinhismindattheverylast,andIcanneverforgethisfaceasheturnedittoCraig.Onehearsofsuchthings:Ihadoften,buthadneverputmuchfaithinthem;butjoy,rapture,triumph,thesearewhatwereinhisface,ashesaid,hisbreathcomingshort,"Yousaid——Hewouldn’t——failme——youwereright——notonce——notonce——Hestucktome——I’mgladhetoldme——
thankGod——foryou——youshowed——me——I’llseeHim——and——tellHim——’
AndCraig,kneelingbesidehimsosteady——Iwasbehavinglikeafool——smileddownthroughhisstreamingtearsintothedimeyessobrightly,tilltheycouldseenomore.Thankhimforthat!Hehelpedtheoldmanthrough,andhehelpedmetoo,thatnight,thankGod!’AndGraeme’svoice,hardtillnow,brokeinasob.
Hehadforgottenus,andwasbackbesidehispassingfriend,andallhisself—controlcouldnotkeepbacktheflowingtears.
’Itwashislifeformine,’hesaidhuskily.
Thebrotherandsisterwerequietlyweeping,butspokenoword,thoughIknewGraemewaswaitingforthem.
Itookuptheword,andtoldofwhatIhadknownofNelson,andhisinfluenceuponthemenofBlackRock.Theylistenedeagerlyenough,butstillwithoutspeaking.Thereseemednothingtosay,tillIsuggestedtoGraemethathemustgetsomerest.Thenthegirlturnedtohim,and,impulsivelyputtingoutherhand,said——
’Oh,itisallsosad;buthowcanweeverthankyou?’
’Thankme!’gaspedGraeme.’Canyouforgiveme?Ibroughthimtohisdeath.’
’No,no!Youmustnotsayso,’sheansweredhurriedly.’Youwouldhavedonethesameforhim.’
’GodknowsIwould,’saidGraemeearnestly;’andGodblessyouforyourwords!’AndIwasthankfultoseethetearsstartinhisdry,burningeyes.
Wecarriedhimtotheoldhomeinthecountry,thathemightliebythesideofthewifehehadlovedandwronged.Afewfriendsmetusatthewaysidestation,andfollowedinsadprocessionalongthecountryroad,thatwoundpastfarmsandthroughwoods,andatlastuptotheascentwherethequaint,oldwoodenchurch,blackwiththerainsandsnowsofmanyyears,stoodamongitssilentgraves.
Thelittlegraveyardslopedgentlytowardsthesettingsun,andfromitonecouldsee,faroneveryside,thefieldsofgrainandmeadowlandthatwanderedoffoversoftlyundulatinghillstomeetthemaplewoodsatthehorizon,dark,green,andcool.Hereandtherewhitefarmhouses,withgreatbarnsstandingnear,lookedoutfromclusteringorchards.
Upthegrass—grownwalk,andthroughthecrowdingmounds,overwhichwaves,uncut,thelong,tanglinggrass,webearourfriend,andlethimgentlydownintothekindlybosomofmotherearth,dark,moist,andwarm.Thesoundofadistantcowbellmingleswiththevoiceofthelastprayer;theclodsdropheavilywithheart—
startlingecho;themoundisheapedandshapedbykindlyfriends,sharingwithoneanotherthetask;thelongroughsodsarelaidoverandpattedintoplace;theoldministertakesfarewellinafewwordsofgentlesympathy;thebrotherandsister,withlingeringlooksatthetwogravessidebyside,theoldandthenew,stepintothefarmer’scarriage,anddriveaway;thesextonlocksthegateandgoeshome,andweareleftoutsidealone.
ThenwewentbackandstoodbyNelson’sgrave.
AfteralongsilenceGraemespoke.
’Connor,hedidnotgrudgehislifetome——andIthink’——andherethewordscameslowly——’Iunderstandnowwhatthatmeans,"WholovedmeandgaveHimselfforme."’
Thentakingoffhishat,hesaidreverently,’ByGod’shelpNelson’slifeshallnotend,butshallgoon.Yes,oldman!’
lookingdownuponthegrave,’I’mwithyou’;andliftinguphisfacetothecalmsky,’Godhelpmetobetrue.’
Thenheturnedandwalkedbrisklyaway,asonemightwhohadpressingbusiness,orassoldiersmarchfromacomrade’sgravetoamerrytune,notthattheyhaveforgotten,buttheyhavestilltofight.
AndthiswasthewayoldmanNelsoncamehome.
CHAPTERSXIV.
GRAEME’SNEWBIRTH
TherewasmoreleftinthatgravethanoldmanNelson’sdeadbody.
ItseemedtomethatGraemeleftpart,atleast,ofhisoldselfthere,withhisdeadfriendandcomrade,inthequietcountrychurchyard.Iwaitedlongfortheoldcareless,recklessspirittoappear,buthewasneverthesameagain.Thechangewasunmistakable,buthardtodefine.Heseemedtohaveresolvedhislifeintoadefinitepurpose.Hewashardlysocomfortableafellowtobewith;hemademefeelevenmorelazyanduselessthanwasmywont;butIrespectedhimmore,andlikedhimnonetheless.
Asalionhewasnotasuccess.Hewouldnotroar.Thiswasdisappointingtome,andtohisfriendsandmine,whohadbeenwaitinghisreturnwitheagerexpectationoftalesofthrillingandbloodthirstyadventure.
Hisfirstdayswerespentinmakingright,orasnearlyrightashecould,thebreakthatdrovehimtothewest.Hisoldfirm(andI
havehadmorerespectforthehumanityoflawyerseversince)
behavedreallywell.Theyprovedtherestorationoftheirconfidenceinhisintegrityandabilitybyofferinghimaplaceinthefirm,which,however,hewouldnotaccept.Then,whenhefeltclean,ashesaid,hepostedoffhome,takingmewithhim.Duringtherailwayjourneyoffourhourshehardlyspoke;butwhenwehadleftthetownbehind,andhadfairlygotuponthecountryroadthatledtowardthehometenmilesaway,hisspeechcametohiminagreatflow.Hisspiritsranover.Hewaslikeaboyreturningfromhisfirstcollegeterm.Hisveryfaceworetheboy’sopen,innocent,earnestlookthatusedtoattractmentohiminhisfirstcollegeyear.Hisdelightinthefieldsandwoods,inthesweetcountryairandthesunlight,waswithoutbound.Howoftenhadwedriventhisroadtogetherintheolddays!
Everyturnwasfamiliar.Theswampwherethetamaracksstoodstraightandslimoutoftheirbedsofmoss;thebrule,asweusedtocallit,wherethepine—stumps,hugeandblackened,werehalf—
hiddenbythenewgrowthofpoplarsandsoftmaples;thebighill,whereweusedtogetoutandwalkwhentheroadswerebad;theorchards,wheretheharvestappleswerebestandmostaccessible——
allhadtheirmemories.
ItwasoneofthoseperfectafternoonsthatsooftencomeintheearlyCanadiansummer,beforeNaturegrowswearywiththeheat.
Thewhitegravelroadwastrimmedoneithersidewithturfoflivinggreen,closecroppedbythesheepthatwanderedinflocksalongitswholelength.Beyondthepicturesquesnake—fencesstretchedthefieldsofspringinggrain,ofvaryingshadesofgreen,withhereandthereadarkbrownpatch,markingaturnipfieldorsummerfallow,andfarbackwerethewoodsofmapleandbeechandelm,withhereandtherethetuftedtopofamightypine,thelonelyrepresentativeofavanishedrace,standingclearabovethehumblertrees.
Aswedrovethroughthebigswamp,wheretheyawning,hauntedgullyplungesdowntoitsgloomydepths,Graemeremindedmeofthatnightwhenourhorsesawsomethinginthatsamegully,andrefusedtogopast;andIfeltagain,thoughitwasbroaddaylight,somethingofthegruethatshivereddownmyback,asIsawinthemoonlightthegleamofawhitethingfarthroughthepinetrunks.
Aswecamenearerhomethehousesbecamefamiliar.Everyhousehaditstale:wehadeatenorsleptinmostofthem;wehadsampledapples,andcherries,andplumsfromtheirorchards,openlyasguests,orsecretlyasmarauders,undercoverofnight——themoredelightfulway,Ifear.Ah!happydays,withtheseinnocentcrimesandfleetingremorses,howbravelywefacedthem,andhowgailywelivedthem,andhowyearninglywelookbackatthemnow!Thesunwasjustdippingintothetree—topsofthedistantwoodsbehindaswecametothetopofthelasthillthatoverlookedthevalley,inwhichlaythevillageofRiverdale.Woodedhillsstoodaboutitonthreesides,and,wherethehillsfadedout,therelaythemill—
pondsleepingandsmilinginthesun.Throughthevillageranthewhiteroad,uppasttheoldframechurch,andontothewhitemansestandingamongthetrees.ThatwasGraeme’shome,andminetoo,forIhadneverknownanotherworthyofthename.Weheldupourteamtolookdownoverthevalley,withitsrampartofwoodedhills,itsshiningpond,anditsnestlingvillage,andonpasttothechurchandthewhitemanse,hidingamongthetrees.Thebeauty,thepeace,thewarm,lovinghomelinessofthescenecameaboutourhearts,but,beingmen,wecouldfindnowords.
’Let’sgo,’criedGraeme,anddownthehillwetoreandrockedandswayedtotheamazementofthesteadyteam,whoseeducationfromtheearliestyearshadimpressedupontheirmindsthecriminalityofattemptingtodoanythingbutwalkcarefullydownahill,atleastfortwo—thirdsoftheway.Throughthevillage,inacloudofdust,weswept,catchingaglimpseofawell—knownfacehereandthere,andflingingasalutationaswepassed,leavingtheownerofthefacerootedtohisplaceinastonishmentatthesightofGraemewhirlingoninhisold—time,well—knownrecklessmanner.OnlyoldDunc.M’Leodwasequaltothemoment,forasGraemecalledout,’Hello,Dunc.!’theoldmanlifteduphishands,andcalledbackinanawedvoice:’Blessmysoul!isityourself?’
’Standshiswhiskywell,pooroldchap!’wasGraeme’scomment.
Aswenearedthechurchhepulleduphisteam,andwewentquietlypastthesleepersthere,thenagainonthefullrundownthegentleslope,overthelittlebrook,anduptothegate.Hehadhardlygothisteampulledupbefore,flingingmethelines,hewasoutoverthewheel,forcomingdownthewalk,withherhandsliftedhigh,wasadaintylittlelady,withthefaceofanangel.InamomentGraemehadherinhisarms.Iheardthefaintcry,’Myboy,myboy,’andgotdownontheothersidetoattendtomyoffhorse,surprisedtofindmyhandstremblingandmyeyesfulloftears.
Backuponthestepsstoodanoldgentleman,withwhitehairandflowingbeard,handsome,straight,andstately——Graeme’sfather,waitinghisturn.
’Welcomehome,mylad,’washisgreeting,ashekissedhisson,andthetremorofhisvoice,andthesightofthetwomenkissingeachother,likewomen,sentmeagaintomyhorses’heads.
’There’sConnor,mother!’shoutedoutGraeme,andthedaintylittlelady,inherblacksilkandwhitelace,cameouttomequickly,withoutstretchedhands.
’You,too,arewelcomehome,’shesaid,andkissedme.
Istoodwithmyhatoff,sayingsomethingaboutbeinggladtocome,butwishingthatIcouldgetawaybeforeIshouldmakequiteafoolofmyself.ForasIlookeddownuponthatbeautifulface,pale,exceptforafaintflushuponeachfadedcheek,andreadthestoryofpainenduredandconquered,andasIthoughtofallthelongyearsofwaitingandofvainhoping,Ifoundmythroatdryandsore,andthewordswouldnotcome.Butherquicksenseneedednowords,andshecametomyhelp.
’YouwillfindJackatthestable,’shesaid,smiling;’heoughttohavebeenhere.’
Thestable!WhyhadInotthoughtofthatbefore?Thankfullynowmywordscame——
’Yes,certainly,I’llfindhim,Mrs.Graeme.Isupposehe’sasmuchofascapegraceasever,andoffIwenttolookupGraeme’syoungbrother,whohadgiveneverypromiseintheolddaysofdevelopingintoasstirringarascalasonecoulddesire;butwho,asIfoundoutlater,hadnotlivedtheseyearsinhismother’shomefornothing.
’Oh,Jack’sagoodboy,’sheanswered,smilingagain,assheturnedtowardtheothertwo,nowwaitingforheruponthewalk.
Theweekthatfollowedwasahappyoneforusall;butforthemotheritwasfulltothebrimwithjoy.Hersweetfacewasfullofcontent,andinhereyesrestedagreatpeace.Ourdayswerespentdrivingaboutamongthehills,orstrollingthroughthemaplewoods,ordownintothetamarackswamp,wherethepitcherplantsandtheswampliliesandthemarigoldwavedabovethedeepmoss.
Intheeveningswesatunderthetreesonthelawntillthestarscameoutandthenightdewsdroveusin.Liketwolovers,Graemeandhismotherwouldwanderofftogether,leavingJackandmetoeachother.Jackwasreadingfordivinity,andwasreallyafine,manlyfellow,withallhisbrother’sturnforrugby,andItooktohimamazingly;butafterthedaywasoverwewouldgatheraboutthesuppertable,andthetalkwouldbeofallthingsunderheaven——
art,football,theology.Themotherwouldleadinall.Howquickshewas,howbrightherfancy,howsubtleherintellect,andthroughallagentlegrace,verywinningandbeautifultosee!
DowhatIwould,Graemewouldtalklittleofthemountainsandhislifethere.
’Mylionwillnotroar,Mrs.Graeme,’Icomplained;’hesimplywillnot.’
’Youshouldtwisthistail,’saidJack.
’Thatseemstobethedifficulty,Jack,’saidhismother,’togetholdofhistale.’
’Oh,mother,’groanedJack;’youneverdidsuchathingbefore!
Howcouldyou?IsitthisbalefulWesterninfluence?’
’Ishallreform,Jack,’sherepliedbrightly.
’But,seriously,Graeme,’Iremonstrated,’yououghttotellyourpeopleofyourlife——thatfree,gloriouslifeinthemountains.’
’Free!Glorious!Tosomemen,perhaps!’saidGraeme,andthenfellintosilence.
ButIsawGraemeasanewmanthenighthetalkedtheologywithhisfather.TheoldministerwasasplendidCalvinist,ofheroictype,andashediscoursedofGod’ssovereigntyandelection,hisfaceglowedandhisvoicerangout.
Graemelistenedintently,nowandthenputtinginaquestion,asonewouldakeenknife—thrustintoafoe.Buttheoldmanknewhisground,andmovedeasilyamonghisideas,demolishingtheenemyasheappeared,withjauntygrace.Inthefullflowofhistriumphantargument,Graemeturnedtohimwithsuddenseriousness.
’Lookhere,father!IwasbornaCalvinist,andIcan’tseehowanyonewithalevelheadcanholdanythingelse,thanthattheAlmightyhassomeideaastohowHewantstorunHisuniverse,andHemeanstocarryoutHisidea,andiscarryingitout;butwhatwouldyoudoinacaselikethis?’ThenhetoldhimthestoryofpoorBillyBreen,hisfightandhisdefeat.
’Wouldyoupreachelectiontothatchap?’
Themother’seyeswereshiningwithtears.
Theoldgentlemanblewhisnoselikeatrumpet,andthensaidgravely——
’No,myboy,youdon’tfeedbabeswithmeat.Butwhatcametohim?’
ThenGraemeaskedmetofinishthetale.AfterIhadfinishedthestoryofBilly’sfinaltriumphandofCraig’spartinit,theysatlongsilent,tilltheminister,clearinghisthroathardandblowinghisnosemorelikeatrumpetthanever,saidwithgreatemphasis——
’ThankGodforsuchamaninsuchaplace!Iwishthereweremoreofuslikehim.’
’Ishouldliketoseeyououtthere,sir,’saidGraemeadmiringly;
’you’dgetthem,butyouwouldn’thavetimeforelection.’
’Yes,yes!’saidhisfatherwarmly;’Ishouldlovetohaveachancejusttopreachelectiontothesepoorlads.WouldIweretwentyyearsyounger!’
’Itisworthaman’slife,’saidGraemeearnestly.Hisyoungerbrotherturnedhisfaceeagerlytowardthemother.Foranswersheslippedherhandintohisandsaidsoftly,whilehereyesshonelikestars——
’Someday,Jack,perhaps!Godknows.’ButJackonlylookedsteadilyather,smilingalittleandpattingherhand.
’You’dshinethere,mother,’saidGraeme,smilinguponher;’you’dbettercomewithme.’Shestarted,andsaidfaintly——
’Withyou?’Itwasthefirsthinthehadgivenofhispurpose.
’Youaregoingback?’
’What!asamissionary?’saidJack.
’Nottopreach,Jack;I’mnotorthodoxenough,’lookingathisfatherandshakinghishead;’buttobuildrailroadsandlendahandtosomepoorchap,ifIcan.’
’Couldyounotfindworknearerhome,myboy?’askedthefather;
’thereisplentyofbothkindsnearushere,surely.’
’Lotsofwork,butnotmine,Ifear,’answeredGraeme,keepinghiseyesawayfromhismother’sface.’Amanmustdohisownwork.’
Hisvoicewasquietandresolute,andglancingatthebeautifulfaceattheendofthetable,Isawinthepalelipsandyearningeyesthatthemotherwasofferingupherfirstborn,thatancientsacrifice.Butnotalltheagonyofsacrificecouldwringfromherentreatyorcomplaintinthehearingofhersons.Thatwasforotherearsandforthesilenthoursofthenight.Andnextmorningwhenshecamedowntomeetusherfacewaswanandweary,butitworethepeaceofvictoryandaglorynotofearth.Hergreetingwasfullofdignity,sweetandgentle;butwhenshecametoGraemeshelingeredoverhimandkissedhimtwice.Andthatwasallthatanyofuseversawofthatsorefight.
AttheendoftheweekItookleaveofthem,andlastofallofthemother.
Shehesitatedjustamoment,thensuddenlyputherhandsuponmyshouldersandkissedme,sayingsoftly,’Youarehisfriend;youwillsometimescometome?’
’Gladly,ifImay,’Ihastenedtoanswer,forthesweet,bravefacewastoomuchtobear;and,tillsheleftusforthatworldofwhichshewasapart,Ikeptmyword,tomyowngreatandlastinggood.
WhenGraememetmeinthecityattheendofthesummer,hebroughtmeherlove,andthenburstforth——
’Connor,doyouknow,Ihavejustdiscoveredmymother!Ihaveneverknownhertillthissummer.’
’Morefoolyou,’Ianswered,foroftenhadI,whohadneverknownamother,enviedhimhis.
’Yes,thatistrue,’heansweredslowly;’butyoucannotseeuntilyouhaveeyes.’
BeforehesetoutagainforthewestIgavehimasupper,askingthemenwhohadbeenwithusintheold’Varsitydays.Iwasdoubtfulastothewisdomofthis,andwaspersuadedonlybyGraeme’seagerassenttomyproposal.
’Certainly,let’shavethem,’hesaid;’Ishallbeawfullygladtoseethem;greatstufftheywere.’
’But,Idon’tknow,Graeme;yousee——well——hangit!——youknow——
you’redifferent,youknow.’
Helookedatmecuriously.
’IhopeIcanstillstandagoodsupper,andiftheboyscan’tstandme,why,Ican’thelpit.I’lldoanythingbutroar,anddon’tyoubegintoworkoffyourmenagerieact——now,youhearme!’
’Well,itisratherhardlinesthatwhenIhavebeentalkingupmylionforayear,andthenfinallysecurehim,thathewillnotroar.’
’Serveyouright,’hereplied,quiteheartlessly;’butI’lltellyouwhatI’lldo,I’llfeed!Don’tyouworry,’headdssoothingly;
’thesupperwillgo.’
Andgoitdid.Thesupperwasofthebest;thewinesfirst—class.
IhadaskedGraemeaboutthewines.
’Doasyoulike,oldman,’washisanswer;’it’syoursupper,but,’
headded,’arethemenallstraight?’
Iranthemoverinmymind.
’Yes;Ithinkso.’
Ifnot,don’tyouhelpthemdown;andanyway,youcan’tbetoocareful.Butdon’tmindme;Iamquitofthewholebusinessfromthisout.’SoIventuredwines,forthelasttime,asithappened.
Wewereaquaintcombination.Old’Beetles,’whosenicknamewaspropheticofhisfuturefameasabugman,asthefellowsirreverentlysaid;’Stumpy’Smith,ademonbowler;PollyLindsay,slowaseverandassureaswhenheheldthehalf—backlinewithGraeme,andusedtomakemyheartstandstillwithterrorathiscooldeliberation.Buthewasneverknowntofumblenortofunk,andsomehowhealwaysgotusoutsafeenough.ThentherewasRattray——’Rat’forshort——who,fromaswell,haddevelopedintoacynicwithasneer,awfullycleverandagoodenoughfellowatheart.Little’Wig’Martin,thesharpestquartereverseen,andbigBarneyLundy,centrescrimmage,whoseterrificroarandrushhadoftenstruckterrortotheenemy’sheart,andwhowasGraeme’sslave.Suchwastheparty.
Asthesupperwentonmyfearsbegantovanish,forifGraemedidnot’roar,’hedidthenextbestthing——ateandtalkedquiteuptohisoldform.Nowweplayedourmatchesoveragain,bitterlylamentingthe’if’s’thathadlostusthechampionships,andwildlyapprovingthetacklesthathadsaved,andtherunsthathadmadethe’Varsitycrowdgomadwithdelightandhadwonforus.Andastheirnamescameupintalk,welearnedhowlifehadgonewiththosewhohadbeenourcomradesoftenyearsago.Some,successhadliftedtohighplaces;some,failurehadleftupontherocks,andafewlayintheirgraves.
Butastheeveningworeon,IbegantowishthatIhadleftoutthewines,forthemenbegantodropanoccasionaloath,thoughIhadletthemknowduringthesummerthatGraemewasnotthemanhehadbeen.ButGraemesmokedandtalkedandheedednot,tillRattraysworebythatnamemostsacredofalleverbornebyman.ThenGraemeopeneduponhiminacool,slowway——
’Whatanawfulfoolamanis,todamnthingsasyoudo,Rat.
Thingsarenotdamned.Itismenwhoare;andthatistoobadtobetalkedmuchaboutbutwhenamanflingsoutofhisfoulmouththenameofJesusChrist’——hereheloweredhisvoice——’it’sashame——it’smore,it’sacrime.’
Therewasdeadsilence,thenRattrayreplied——
’Isupposeyou’rerightenough,itisbadform;butcrimeisratherstrong,Ithink.’
’Notifyouconsiderwhoitis,’saidGraemewithemphasis.
’Oh,comenow,’brokeinBeetles.’Religionisallright,isagoodthing,andIbelieveanecessarythingfortherace,butnoonetakesseriouslyanylongertheChristmyth.’
’Whataboutyourmother,Beetles?’putinWigMartin.
Beetlesconsignedhimtothepitandwassilent,forhisfatherwasanEpiscopalclergyman,andhismotherasaintlywoman.
’Ifooledwiththatforsometime,Beetles,butitwon’tdo.Youcan’tbuildareligionthatwilltakethedeviloutofamanonamyth.Thatwon’tdothetrick.Idon’twanttoargueaboutit,butIamquiteconvincedthemyththeoryisnotreasonable,andbesides,itwontwork.’
’Willtheotherwork?’askedRattray,withasneer.
’Sure!’saidGrame;’I’veseenit.’
’Where?’challengedRattray.’Ihaven’tseenmuchofit.’
’Yes,youhave,Rattray,youknowyouhave,’saidWigagain.ButRattrayignoredhim.
’I’lltellyou,boys,’saidGraeme.’Iwantyoutoknow,anyway,whyIbelievewhatIdo.’
ThenhetoldthemthestoryofoldmanNelson,fromtheoldcoastdays,beforeIknewhim,totheend.Hetoldthestorywell.Thesternfightandthevictoryofthelife,andtheself—sacrificeandthepathosofthedeathappealedtothesemen,wholovedfightandcouldunderstandsacrifice.
’That’swhyIbelieveinJesusChrist,andthat’swhyIthinkitacrimetoflingHisnameabout!’
’IwishtoHeavenIcouldsaythat,’saidBeetles.
’Keepwishinghardenoughanditwillcometoyou,’saidGraeme.
’Lookhere,oldchap,’saidRattray;’you’requiterightaboutthis;I’mwillingtoownup.Wigiscorrect.Iknowafew,atleast,ofthatstamp,butmostofthosewhogoinforthatsortofthingarenotmuchaccount’
’Fortenyears,Rattray,’saidGraemeinadownright,matter—of—
factway,’youandIhavetriedthissortofthing’——tappingabottle——’andwegotoutofitallthereistobegot,paidwellforit,too,and——faugh!youknowit’snotgoodenough,andthemoreyougoinforit,themoreyoucurseyourself.SoIhavequitthisandIamgoinginfortheother.’
’What!goinginforpreaching?’
’Notmuch——railroading——moneyinit——andlendingahandtofellowsontherocks.’
’Isay,don’tyouwantacentreforward?’saidbigBarneyinhisdeepvoice.
’Everymanmustplayhisgameinhisplace,oldchap.I’dliketoseeyoutackleit,though,rightwell,’saidGraemeearnestly.Andsohedid,intheafteryears,andgoodtacklingitwas.Butthatisanotherstory.
’But,Isay,Graeme,’persistedBeetles,’aboutthisbusiness,doyoumeantosayyougothewholething——Jonah,youknow,andtherestofit?’
Graemehesitated,thensaid——
’Ihaven’tmuchofacreed,Beetles;don’treallyknowhowmuchI
believe.But,’bythistimehewasstanding,’Idoknowthatgoodisgood,andbadisbad,andgoodandbadarenotthesame.AndI
knowaman’safooltofollowtheone,andawisemantofollowtheother,and,’loweringhisvoice,’IbelieveGodisatthebackofamanwhowantstogetdonewithbad.I’vetriedallthatfolly,’
sweepinghishandovertheglassesandbottles,’andallthatgoeswithit,andI’vedonewithit’
’I’llgoyouthatfar,’roaredbigBarney,followinghisoldcaptainasofyore.
’Goodman,’saidGraeme,strikinghandswithhim.
’Putmedown,’saidlittleWigcheerfully.
ThenItookuptheword,forthererosebeforemethesceneintheLeaguesaloon,andIsawthebeautifulfacewiththedeepshiningeyes,andIwasspeakingforheragain.ItoldthemofCraigandhisfightforthesemen’slives.Itoldthem,too,ofhowIhadbeentooindolenttobegin.’But,’Isaid,’Iamgoingthisfarfromto—night,’andIsweptthebottlesintothechampagnetub.
’Isay,’saidPollyLindsay,comingupinhisoldstyle,slowbutsure,’let’sallgoin,sayforfiveyears.’Andsowedid.Wedidn’tsignanything,buteverymanshookhandswithGraeme.
AndasItoldCraigaboutthisayearlater,whenhewasonhiswaybackfromhisOldLandtriptojoinGraemeinthemountains,hethrewuphisheadintheoldwayandsaid,’Itwaswelldone.Itmusthavebeenworthseeing.OldmanNelson’sworkisnotdoneyet.Tellmeagain,’andhemademegooverthewholescenewithallthedetailsputin.
ButwhenItoldMrs.Mavor,aftertwoyearshadgone,sheonlysaid,’Oldthingsarepassedaway,allthingsarebecomenew’;butthelightglowedinhereyestillIcouldnotseetheircolour.
Butallthat,too,isanotherstory.
CHAPTERXV
COMINGTOTHEIROWN
Amanwithaconscienceisoftenprovoking,sometimesimpossible.
Persuasionislostuponhim.Hewillnotgetangry,andhelooksatonewithsuchafar—awayexpressioninhisfacethatinstrivingtopersuadehimonefeelsearthlyandevenfiendish.AtleastthiswasmyexperiencewithCraig.HespentaweekwithmejustbeforehesailedfortheOldLand,forthepurpose,ashesaid,ofgettingsomeofthecoaldustandothergrimeoutofhim.
Hemademeangrythelastnightofhisstay,andallthemorethatheremainedquitesweetlyunmoved.ItwasastrategicmistakeofminetotellhimhowNelsoncamehometous,andhowGraemestoodupbeforethe’VarsitychapsatmysupperandmadehisconfessionandconfusedRattray’seasy—steppingprofanity,andstartedhisownfive—yearleague.ForallthisstirredinCraigthehero,andhewasreadyforallsortsofheroicnonsense,asIcalledit.Wetalkedofeverythingbuttheonething,andaboutthatwesaidnotawordtill,bendinglowtopokemyfireandtohidemyface,I
plunged——
’Youwillseeher,ofcourse?’
Hemadenopretenceofnotunderstandingbutanswered——
’Ofcourse.’
’There’sreallynosenseinherstayingoverthere,’Isuggested.
’Andyetsheisawisewoman,’hesaid,asifcarefullyconsideringthequestion.
’Heapsoflandlordsneverseetheirtenants,andtheyarenonetheworse.’
’Thelandlords?’
’No,thetenants.’
’Probably,havingsuchlandlords.’
’Andasfortheoldlady,theremustbesomeoneintheconnectiontowhomitwouldbeaGodsendtocareforher.’
’Now,Connor,’hesaidquietly,’don’t.Wehavegoneoverallthereistobesaid.Nothingnewhascome.Don’tturnitallupagain.’
ThenIplayedtheheathenandraged,asGraemewouldhavesaid,tillCraigsmiledalittlewearilyandsaid——
’Youexhaustyourself,oldchap.Haveapipe,do’;andafterapauseheaddedinhisownway,’Whatwouldyouhave?Thepathliesstraightfrommyfeet.ShouldIquitit?Icouldnotsodisappointyou——andallofthem.’
AndIknewhewasthinkingofGraemeandtheladsinthemountainshehadtaughttobetruemen.Itdidnothelpmyrage,butitcheckedmyspeech;soIsmokedinsilencetillhewasmovedtosay——
’Andafterall,youknow,oldchap,therearegreatcompensationsforalllosses;butforthelossofagoodconsciencetowardsGod,whatcanmakeup?’
But,allthesame,IhopedforsomebetterresultfromhisvisittoBritain.Itseemedtomethatsomethingmustturnuptochangesuchanunbearablesituation.
Theyearpassed,however,andwhenIlookedintoCraig’sfaceagainIknewthatnothinghadbeenchanged,andthathehadcomebacktotakeupagainhislifealone,moreresolutelyhopefulthanever.
Buttheyearhadleftitsmarkuponhimtoo.Hewasabroaderanddeeperman.Hehadbeenlivingandthinkingwithmenoflargerideasandricherculture,andhewasfartooquickinsympathywithlifetoremainuntouchedbyhissurroundings.Hewasmoretolerantofopinionsotherthanhisown,butmoreunrelentinginhisfidelitytoconscienceandmoreimpatientofhalf—heartednessandself—indulgence.Hewasfullofreverenceforthegreatscholarsandthegreatleadersofmenhehadcometoknow.
’Great,noblefellowstheyare,andextraordinarilymodest,’hesaid——’thatis,thereallygreataremodest.Thereareplentyoftheothersort,neithergreatnormodest.Andthebookstoberead!Iamquitehopelessaboutmyreading.Itgavemeaqueersensationtoshakehandswithamanwhohadwrittenagreatbook.
Tohearhimmakecommonplaceremarks,towitnessafalteringinknowledge——oneexpectsthesementoknoweverything——andtoexperiencerespectfulkindnessathishands!’
’Whatoftheyoungermen?’Iasked.
’Bright,keen,generousfellows.Inthingstheoretical,omniscient;
butinthingspractical,quitehelpless.Theytossaboutgreatideasastheminerslumpsofcoal.Theycancallthembytheirbooknameseasilyenough,butIoftenwonderedwhethertheycouldputthemintoEnglish.SomeofthemIcovetedforthemountains.Menwithclearheadsandbighearts,andbuiltafterSandyM’Naughton’smodel.ItdoesseemasinfulwasteofGod’sgoodhumanstufftoseethesefellowspotterawaytheirlivesamongtheorieslivinganddead,andendupbyproducingabook!Theyarealleithermakingorgoingtomakeabook.Agoodthingwehaven’ttoreadthem.Buthereandthereamongthemissomequietchapwhowillmakeabookthatmenwilltumbleovereachothertoread.’
Thenwepausedandlookedateachother.
’Well?’Isaid.Heunderstoodme.
’Yes!’heansweredslowly,’doinggreatwork.Everyoneworshipsherjustaswedo,andsheismakingthemalldosomethingworthwhile,assheusedtomakeus.’
Hespokecheerfullyandreadilyasifhewererepeatingalessonwelllearned,buthecouldnothumbugme.Ifelttheheartacheinthecheerfultone.
’Tellmeabouther,’Isaid,forIknewthatifhewouldtalkitwoulddohimgood.Andtalkhedid,oftenforgettingme,till,asIlistened,Ifoundmyselflookingagainintothefathomlesseyes,andhearingagaintheheart—searchingvoice.Isawhergoinandoutofthelittlered—tiledcottagesanddownthenarrowbacklanesofthevillage;Iheardhervoiceinasweet,lowsongbythebedofadyingchild,orpouringforthfloodsofmusicinthegreatnewhallofthefactorytownnearby.ButIcouldnotsee,thoughhetriedtoshowme,thestatelygraciousladyreceivingthecountryfolkinherhome.Hedidnotlingeroverthatscene,butwentbackagaintothegate—cottagewhereshehadtakenhimonedaytoseeBillyBreen’smother.
’Ifoundtheoldwomanknewallaboutme,’hesaid,simplyenough;
’butthereweremanythingsaboutBillyshehadneverheard,andI
wasgladtoputherrightonsomepoints,thoughMrs.Mavorwouldnothearit.’
Hesatsilentforalittle,lookingintothecoals;thenwentoninasoft,quietvoice——
’ItbroughtbackthemountainsandtheolddaystohearagainBilly’stonesinhismother’svoice,andtoseehersittingthereintheverydresssheworethenightoftheLeague,youremember——
somesoftstuffwithblacklaceaboutit——andtohearhersingasshedidforBilly——ah!ah!’Hisvoiceunexpectedlybroke,butinamomenthewasmasterofhimselfandbeggedmetoforgivehisweakness.IamafraidIsaidwordsthatshouldnotbesaid——athingIneverdo,exceptwhensuddenlyandutterlyupset.
’Iamgettingselfishandweak,’hesaid;’Imustgettowork.I
amgladtogettowork.Thereismuchtodo,anditisworthwhile,ifonlytokeeponefromgettinguselessandlazy.’
’Uselessandlazy!’Isaidtomyself,thinkingofmylifebesidehis,andtryingtogetcommandofmyvoice,soasnottomakequiteafoolofmyself.Andformanyadaythosewordsgoadedmetoworkandtotheexerciseofsomemildself—denial.Butmorethanallelse,afterCraighadgonebacktothemountains,Graeme’slettersfromtherailwayconstructioncampstirredonetodounpleasantdutylongpostponed,andrendereduncomfortablemyhoursofmostluxuriousease.Manyoftheoldgangwerewithhim,bothoflumbermenandminers,andCraigwastheirminister.Andtheletterstoldofhowhelabouredbydayandbynightalongthelineofconstruction,carryinghistentandkitwithhim,preachingstraightsermons,watchingbysickmen,writingtheirletters,andwinningtheirhearts;makingstrongtheirlives,andhelpingthemtodiewellwhentheirhourcame.Oneday,theselettersprovedtoomuchforme,andIpackedawaymypaintsandbrushes,andmademyvowuntotheLordthatIwouldbe’uselessandlazy’nolonger,butwoulddosomethingwithmyself.Inconsequence,IfoundmyselfwithinthreeweekswalkingtheLondonhospitals,finishingmycourse,thatImightjointhatbandofmenwhoweredoingsomethingwithlife,or,ifthrowingitaway,werenotlosingitfornothing.
Ihadfinishedbeingafool,Ihoped,atleastafooloftheuselessandluxuriouskind.TheletterthatcamefromGraeme,inreplytomyrequestforapositiononhisstaff,wascharacteristicoftheman,bothnewandold,fullofgayesthumourandofmostearnestwelcometothework.
Mrs.Mavor’sreplywaslikeherself——
’Iknewyouwouldnotlongbecontentwiththemakingofpictures,whichtheworlddoesnotreallyneed,andwouldjoinyourfriendsinthedearWest,makinglivesthattheworldneedssosorely.’
Butherlastwordstouchedmestrangely——
’ButbesuretobethankfuleverydayforyourprivilegeItwillbegoodtothinkofyouall,withthegloriousmountainsaboutyou,andChrist’sownworkinyourhandsAh!howwewouldliketochooseourwork,andtheplaceinwhichtodoit!’
Thelongingdidnotappearinthewords,butIneedednowordstotellmehowdeepandhowconstantitwas.AndItakesomecredittomyself,thatinmyreplyIgavehernobiddingtojoinourband,butratherpraisedtheworkshewasdoinginherplace,tellingherhowIhadheardofitfromCraig.
ThesummerfoundmereligiouslydoingParisandVienna,gainingamoreperfectacquaintancewiththeextentandvarietyofmyownignorance,andsofullyoccupiedinthisinterestingandwholesomeoccupationthatIfelloutwithallmycorrespondents,withtheresultofweeksofsilencebetweenus.
TwolettersamongtheheapwaitingonmytableinLondonmademyheartbeatquick,butwithhowdifferentfeelings:onefromGraemetellingmethatCraighadbeenveryill,andthathewastotakehimhomeassoonashecouldbemoved.Mrs.Mavor’slettertoldmeofthedeathoftheoldlady,whohadbeenhercareforthepasttwoyears,andofherintentiontospendsomemonthsinheroldhomeinEdinburgh.Andthisletteritisthataccountsformypresenceinamiserable,dingy,dirtylittlehallrunningoffacloseinthehistoricCowgate,redolentofthegloriesofthesplendidpast,andofthevariousodoursoftheevil—smellingpresent.IwastheretohearMrs.Mavorsingtothecrowdofgaminsthatthrongedtheclosesintheneighbourhood,andthathadbeengatheredintoaclubby’afineleddiefraetheWestEnd,’fortheloveofChristandHislost.Thiswasan’AtHome’night,andthemothersandfathers,sistersandbrothers,ofallagesandsizeswerepresent.OfallthesadfacesIhadeverseen,thosemotherscarriedthesaddestandmostwoe—stricken.’Heavenpityus!’Ifoundmyselfsaying;’isthisthebeautiful,thecultured,theheaven—exaltedcityofEdinburgh?Willitnot,forthis,becastdownintohellsomeday,ifitrepentnotofitsclosesandtheirdensofdefilement?Oh!theutterweariness,thedazedhopelessnessoftheghastlyfaces!Donotthekindly,gentlechurch—goingfolkofthecrescentsandthegardensseethemintheirdreams,oraretheirdreamstooheavenlyfortheseghastlyfacestoappear?’
Icannotrecalltheprogrammeoftheevening,butinmymemory—
galleryisavividpictureofthatface,sweet,sad,beautiful,alightwiththedeepglowofhereyes,asshestoodandsangtothatdingycrowd.AsIsatuponthewindow—ledgelisteningtothevoicewithitsflowingsong,mythoughtswerefaraway,andIwaslookingdownoncemoreupontheeager,coal—grimedfacesintherudelittlechurchinBlackRock.Iwasbroughtbacktofindmyselfswallowinghardbyanaudiblewhisperfromaweelassietohermother——
’Mither!Seetillyonman.He’sgreetin’.’
WhenIcametomyselfshewassinging’TheLando’theLeal,’theScotch’JerusalemtheGolden,’immortal,perfect.Itneededexperienceofthehunger—hauntedCowgatecloses,chillwiththeblackmistofaneasternhaar,tofeelthefullblissofthevisioninthewords——
’There’snaesorrowthere,Jean,There’sneithercauldnorcare,Jean,ThedayisayefairinTheLando’theLeal.’
Alandoffair,warmdays,untouchedbysorrowandcare,wouldbeheavenindeedtothedwellersoftheCowgate.
Therestofthateveningishazyenoughtomenow,tillIfindmyselfoppositeMrs.Mavoratherfire,readingGraeme’sletter;
thenallisvividagain.
Icouldnotkeepthetruthfromher.Iknewitwouldbefollytotry.SoIreadstraightontillIcametothewords——
’Hehashadmountainfever,whateverthatmaybe,andhewillnotpullupagain.IfIcan,Ishalltakehimhometomymother’——whenshesuddenlystretchedoutherhand,saying,’Oh,letmeread!’andIgavehertheletter.Inaminuteshehadreadit,andbeganalmostbreathlessly——
’Listen!mylifeismuchchanged.Mymother—in—lawisgone;sheneedsmenolonger.Mysolicitortellsme,too,thatowingtounfortunateinvestmentsthereisneedofmoney,sogreatneed,thatitispossiblethateithertheestatesortheworksmustgo.Mycousinhashisallintheworks——ironworks,youknow.Itwouldbewrongtohavehimsuffer.Ishallgiveuptheestates——thatisbest.’Shepaused.
’Andcomewithme,’Icried.
’Whendoyousail?’
’Nextweek,’Iansweredeagerly.
Shelookedatmeafewmoments,andintohereyestherecamealightsoftandtender,asshesaid——
’Ishallgowithyou.’
Andsoshedid;andnooldRomaninallthegloryofaTriumphcarriedaprouderheartthanI,asIboreherandherlittleonefromthetraintoGraeme’scarriage,crying——
’I’vegother.’
Buthiswasthebettersense,forhestoodwavinghishatandshouting——
’He’sallright,’atwhichMrs.Mavorgrewwhite;butwhensheshookhandswithhim,theredwasinhercheekagain.
’Itwasthecabledidit,’wentonGraeme.’Connor’sagreatdoctor!Hisfirstcasewillmakehimfamous.Goodprescription——
aftermountainfevertryacablegram!’Andtheredgrewdeeperinthebeautifulfacebesideus.
Neverdidthecountrylooksolovely.Thewoodswereintheirgayestautumndress;thebrownfieldswerebathedinapurplehaze;
theairwassweetandfreshwithasuspicionofthecomingfrostsofwinter.Butinspiteofalltheroadseemedlong,anditwasasifhourshadgonebeforeoureyesfelluponthewhitemansestandingamongthegoldenleaves.
’Letthemgo,’Icried,asGraemepausedtotakeintheview,anddowntheslopingdustyroadweflewonthedeadrun.
’RemindsonealittleofAbe’scurves,’saidGraeme,aswedrewupatthegate.ButIansweredhimnot,forIwasintroducingtoeachotherthetwobestwomenintheworld.AsIwasabouttorushintothehouse,Graemeseizedmebythecollar,saying——
’Holdon,Connor!youforgetyourplace,you’renext.’
’Why,certainly,’Icried,thankfullyenough;’whatanassIam!’
’Quitetrue,’saidGraemesolemnly.
’Whereishe?’Iasked.
’Atthispresentmoment?’heasked,inashockedvoice.’Why,Connor,yousurpriseme.’
’Oh,Isee!’
’Yes,’hewentongravely;’youmaytrustmymothertobediscreetlyattendingtoherdomesticduties;sheisagreatwoman,mymother.’
Ihadnodoubtofit,foratthatmomentshecameouttouswithlittleMarjorieinherarms.
’YouhaveshownMrs.Mavortoherroom,mother,Ihope,’saidGraeme;butsheonlysmiledandsaid——
’Runawaywithyourhorses,yousillyboy,’atwhichhesolemnlyshookhishead.’Ah,mother,youaredeep——whowouldhavethoughtitofyou?’
Thateveningthemanseoverflowedwithjoy,andthedaysthatfollowedwerelikedreamssettosweetmusic.
Butforsheerwilddelight,nothinginmymemorycanquitecomeuptothedemonstrationorganisedbyGraeme,withassistancefromNixon,Shaw,Sandy,Abe,Geordie,andBaptiste,inhonourofthearrivalincampofMr.andMrs.Craig.And,inmyopinion,itaddedsomethingtotheoccasion,thatafterallthecheersforMr.
andMrs.Craighaddiedaway,andafterallthehatshadcomedown,Baptiste,whohadnevertakenhiseyesfromthatradiantface,shouldsuddenlyhavesweptthecrowdintoaperfectstormofcheersbyexcitedlyseizinghistuque,andcallingoutinhisshrillvoice——
’Bygar!TreecheerforMrs.Mavor.’
AndformanyadaythemenofBlackRockwouldeasilyfallintotheoldandwell—lovedname;butupanddownthelineofconstruction,inallthecampsbeyondtheGreatDivide,thenewnamebecameasdearastheoldhadeverbeeninBlackRock.
Thoseoldwilddaysarelongsincegoneintothedimdistanceofthepast.Theywillnotcomeagain,forwehavefallenintoquiettimes;butofteninmyquietesthoursIfeelmyheartpauseinitsbeattohearagainthatstrong,clearvoice,likethesoundofatrumpet,biddingustobemen;andIthinkofthemall——Graeme,theirchief,Sandy,Baptiste,Geordie,Abe,theCampbells,Nixon,Shaw,allstronger,betterfortheirknowingofhim,andthenI
thinkofBillyasleepunderthepines,andofoldmanNelsonwiththelonggrasswavingoverhiminthequietchurchyard,andallmynonsenseleavesme,andIblesstheLordforallHisbenefits,butchieflyforthedayImetthemissionaryofBlackRockinthelumber—campamongtheSelkirks.
第6章