首页 >出版文学> Lorna Doonel>第54章

第54章

  Allourhousewasquitesnowedup,exceptwherewehadpurgedaway,bydintofconstantshovellings。Thekitchenwasasdarkanddarkerthanthecider-cellar,andlonglinesoffurrowedscollopsranevenuptothechimney-stacks。Severalwindowsfellrightinwards,throughtheweightofthesnowagainstthem;andthefewthatstood,bulgedin,andbentlikeanoldbruisedlanthorn。Wewereobligedtocookbycandle-light;wewereforcedtoreadbycandle-light;asforbaking,wecouldnotdoit,becausetheovenwastoochill;andaloadoffaggotsonlybroughtalittlewetdownthesidesofit。
  Forwhenthesunburstforthatlastuponthatworldofwhite,whathebroughtwasneitherwarmth,norcheer,norhopeofsoftening;onlyaclearershaftofcold,fromthevioletdepthsofsky。Long-drawnalleysofwhitehazeseemedtoleadtowardshim,yetsuchashecouldnotcomedown,withanywarmthremaining。Broadwhitecurtainsofthefrost-fogloopedaroundthelowersky,onthevergeofhillandvalley,andabovetheladentrees。Onlyroundthesunhimself,andthespotofheavenheclaimed,clusteredabrightpurple-blue,clear,andcalm,anddeep。
  Thatnightsuchafrostensuedaswehadneverdreamedof,neitherreadinancientbooks,orhistoriesofFrobisher。Thekettlebythefirefroze,andthecrockuponthehearth-cheeks;manymenwerekilled,andcattlerigidintheirhead-ropes。ThenIheardthatfearfulsound,whichneverIhadheardbefore,neithersincehaveheardexceptduringthatsamewinter,thesharpyetsolemnsoundoftreesburstopenbythefrost-blow。Ourgreatwalnutlostthreebranches,andhasbeendyingeversince;thoughgrowingmeanwhile,asthesouldoes。Andtheancientoakatthecrosswasrent,andmanyscoreofashtrees。ButwhyshouldI
  tellallthis?thepeoplewhohavenotseenitasI
  havewillonlymakefaces,anddisbelieve;tillsuchanotherfrostcomes;whichperhapsmayneverbe。
  ThisterribleweatherkeptTomFaggusfromcomingnearourhouseforweeks;atwhichindeedIwasnotvexedaquartersomuchasAnniewas;forIhadneverhalfapprovedofhim,asahusbandformysister;inspiteofhispurchasefromSquireBassett,andthegrantoftheRoyalpardon。Itmaybe,however,thatAnnietookthesameviewofmyloveforLorna,andcouldnotaugurwellofit;butifso,sheheldherpeace,thoughIwasnotsosparing。Formanythingscontributedtomakemelessgood-humourednowthanmyrealnaturewas;andtheveryleastofallthesethingswouldhavebeenenoughtomakesomepeoplecross,andrude,andfractious。Imeantheredandpainfulchappingofmyfaceandhands,fromworkinginthesnowallday,andlyinginthefrostallnight。Forbeingofafaircomplexion,andaruddynature,andprettyplumpwithal,andfedonplentyofhotvictuals,andalwaysforcedbymymothertositnearerthefirethanI
  wished,itwaswonderfultoseehowthecoldranrevelonmycheeksandknuckles。AndIfearedthatLornaifitshouldeverpleaseGodtostopthesnowingmighttakethisforaproofoflowandrusticbloodandbreeding。
  AndthisIsaywasthesmallestthing;foritwasfarmoreseriousthatwewerelosinghalfourstock,doallwewouldtoshelterthem。Eventhehorsesinthestablesmusteredalltogetherforthesakeofbreathandsteaminghadlongiciclesfromtheirmuzzles,almosteverymorning。Butofallthingstheverygravest,tomyapprehension,wastheimpossibilityofhearing,orhavinganytokenoforfrommylovedone。
  Notthatthosethreedaysaloneofsnowtremendousasitwascouldhaveblockedthecountryso;butthattheskyhadneverceased,formorethantwodaysatatime,forfullthreeweeksthereafter,topourfreshpilesoffleecymantle;neitherhadthewindrelaxedasingledayfromshakingthem。Asarule,itsnowedallday,clearedupatnight,andfrozeintensely,withthestarsasbrightasjewels,earthspreadoutinlustroustwilight,andthesoundsintheairassharpandcracklingasartillery;theninthemorning,snowagain;beforethesuncouldcometohelp。
  Itmatterednotwhatwaythewindwas。Oftenandoftenthevaneswentround,andwehopedforchangeofweather;theonlychangewasthatitseemedifpossibletogrowcolder。Indeed,afteraweekorso,thewindwouldregularlyboxthecompassasthesailorscallitinthecourseofeveryday,followingwherethesunshouldbe,asiftomakeamockofhim。
  Andthisofcourseimmenselyaddedtotheperilofthedrifts;becausetheyshiftedeveryday;andnoskillorcaremightlearnthem。
  IbelieveitwasonEpiphanymorning,orsomewhereaboutthatperiod,whenLizzieranintothekitchentome,whereIwasthawingmygoose-grease,withthedogsamongtheashes——thelivedogs,Imean,nottheironones,forthemwehadgivenuplongago,——andhavingcaughtme,bywayofwonderforgenerallyIwasoutshovelinglongbeforemy’younglady’hadhernightcapoff,shepositivelykissedme,forthesakeofwarmingherlipsperhaps,orbecauseshehadsomethingproudtosay。
  ’Yougreatfool,John,’saidmylady,asAnnieandI
  usedtocallher,onaccountofherairsandgraces;
  ’whatapityyouneverread,John!’
  ’Muchuse,Ishouldthink,inreading!’Ianswered,thoughpleasedwithhercondescension;’read,I
  suppose,withroofcomingin,andonlythischimneyleftstickingoutofthesnow!’
  ’Theverytimetoread,John,’saidLizzie,lookinggrander;’ourworsttroublesaretheneed,whenceknowledgecandeliverus。’
  ’Amen,’Icriedout;’areyouparsonorclerk?
  Whicheveryouare,good-morning。’
  ThereuponIwasbentonmyusualroundaverysmallonenowadays,butElizatookmewithbothhands,andI
  stoppedofcourse;forIcouldnotbeartoshakethechild,eveninplay,foramoment,becauseherbackwastender。Thenshelookedupatmewithherbeautifuleyes,solarge,unhealthyanddelicate,andstrangelyshadowingoutward,asiftospreadtheirmeaning;andshesaid,——
  ’Now,John,thisisnotimetojoke。Iwasalmostfrozeninbedlastnight;andAnnielikeanicicle。
  Feelhowcoldmyhandsare。Now,willyoulistentowhatIhavereadaboutclimatestentimesworsethanthis;andwherenonebutclevermencanlive?’
  ’Impossibleformetolistennow,Ihavehundredsofthingstoseeto;butIwilllistenafterbreakfasttoyourforeignclimates,child。Nowattendtomother’shotcoffee。’
  Shelookedalittledisappointed,butsheknewwhatI
  hadtodo;andafterallshewasnotsoutterlyunreasonable;althoughshedidreadbooks。AndwhenI
  haddonemymorning’swork,Ilistenedtoherpatiently;anditwasoutofmypowertothinkthatallshesaidwasfoolish。
  ForIknewcommonsenseprettywell,bythistime,whetherithappenedtobemyown,oranyotherperson’s,ifclearlylaidbeforeme。AndLizziehadaparticularwayofsettingforthveryclearlywhatevershewishedtoexpressandenforce。Butthequeerestpartofitallwasthis,thatifshecouldbuthavedreamedforamomentwhatwouldbethefirstapplicationmademebyofherlesson,shewouldratherhavebittenhertongueoffthanhelpmetomypurpose。
  ShetoldmethatintheArcticRegions,astheycallsomeplaces,alongwaynorth,wheretheGreatBearliesallacrosstheheavens,andnosunisup,forwholemonthsatatime,andyetwherepeoplewillgoexploring,outofpurecontradiction,andforthesakeofnovelty,andloveofbeingfrozen——thatheretheyalwayshadsuchwintersaswewerehavingnow。Itneverceasedtofreeze,shesaid;anditneverceasedtosnow;exceptwhenitwastoocold;andthenalltheairwaschokedwithglitteringspikes;andaman’sskinmightcomeoffofhim,beforehecouldaskthereason。
  Neverthelessthepeopletherealthoughthesnowwasfiftyfeetdeep,andalltheirbreathfellbehindthemfrozen,likealogofwooddroppedfromtheirshoulders,yettheymanagedtogetalong,andmakethetimeoftheyeartoeachother,byalittlecleverness。
  Forseeinghowthesnowwasspread,lightlyovereverything,coveringupthehillsandvalleys,andtheforeskinofthesea,theycontrivedawaytocrownit,andtoglidelikeaflakealong。Throughthesparkleofthewhiteness,andthewreathsofwindytossings,andtheupsanddownsofcold,anymanmightgetalongwithaboatoneitherfoot,topreventhissinking。
  Shetoldmehowtheseboatsweremade;verystrongandverylight,ofribswithskinacrossthem;fivefeetlong,andonefootwide;andturnedupateachend,evenasacanoeis。Butshedidnottellme,nordidI
  giveitamoment’sthoughtmyself,howharditwastowalkuponthemwithoutearlypractice。Thenshetoldmeanotherthingequallyusefultome;althoughIwouldnotletherseehowmuchIthoughtaboutit。Andthisconcernedtheuseofsledges,andtheirpowerofgliding,andthelightnessoftheirfollowing;allofwhichIcouldseeatonce,throughknowledgeofourownfarm-sleds;whichweemployinlieuofwheels,usedinflatterdistricts。WhenIhadheardallthisfromher,amerechitofagirlasshewas,unfittomakeasnowballeven,ortofrysnowpancakes,Ilookeddownonherwithamazement,andbegantowishalittlethatIhadgivenmoretimetobooks。
  ButGodshapesallourfitness,andgiveseachmanhismeaning,evenasheguidesthewaveringlinesofsnowdescending。OurElizawasmeantforbooks;ourdearAnnieforlovingandcooking;I,JohnRidd,forsheep,andwrestling,andthethoughtofLorna;andmothertoloveallthreeofus,andtomakethebestofherchildren。Andnow,ifImusttellthetruth,asateverypageItrytodothoughGodknowsitishardenough,Ihadfeltthroughallthisweather,thoughmylifewasLorna’s,somethingofasatisfactioninsodoingdutytomykindestandbestofmothers,andtononebuther。Forifyoucometothinkofitaman’syoungloveisverypleasant,verysweet,andtickling;
  andtakeshimthroughthecoreofheart;withouthisknowinghoworwhy。Thenhedwellsuponitsideways,withoutpeoplelooking,andbuildsupallsortsoffancies,growinghotwithworkingsoathisownimaginings。SohisloveisacrystalGoddess,setuponanobelisk;andwhoeverwillnotbowthekneeyetwithoutglancingather,thelovermakesitasacredriteeithertokickortostickhim。IamnotspeakingofmeandLorna,butofcommonpeople。
  Thenifyoucometothinkagainlo!——orIwillnotsaylo!fornoonecanbeholdit——onlyfeel,orbutremember,whatarealmotheris。Everloving,eversoft,everturningsintogoodness,vicesintovirtues;
  blindtoallnine-tenthsofwrong;throughatelescopebeholdingthoughherselfsonightothemfaintestdecimalofpromise,eveninhervilestchild。ReadytothankGodagain,aswhenherbabewasborntoher;
  leapingasatkingdom-comeatawanderingsyllableofGospelforherlostone。
  Allthisourmotherwastous,andevenmorethanallofthis;andhenceIfeltaprideandjoyindoingmysacreddutytowardsher,nowthattheweathercompelledme。Andshewasasgratefulanddelightedasifshehadnomoreclaimuponmethanastranger’ssheepmighthave。YetfromtimetotimeIgroanedwithinmyselfandbymyself,atthinkingofmysaddebarmentfromthesightofLorna,andofallthatmighthavehappenedtoher,nowshehadnoprotection。
  Therefore,Ifelltoatonce,uponthathintfromLizzie,andbeingusedtothatching-work,andthemakingoftraps,andsoon,beforeverylongIbuiltmyselfapairofstrongandlightsnow-shoes,framedwithashandribbedofwithy,withhalf-tannedcalf-
  skinstretchedacross,andaninnersoletosupportmyfeet。AtfirstIcouldnotwalkatall,butflounderedaboutmostpiteously,catchingoneshoeintheother,andbothoftheminthesnow-drifts,tothegreatamusementofthegirls,whowerecometolookatme。
  ButafterawhileIgrewmoreexpert,discoveringwhatmyerrorswere,andalteringtheinclinationoftheshoesthemselves,accordingtoaprintwhichLizziefoundinabookofadventures。Andthismadesuchadifference,thatIcrossedthefarmyardandcamebackagainthoughturningwastheworstthingofall