首页 >出版文学> WALDEN>第27章

第27章

  Ihavefoundrepeatedly,oflateyears,thatIcannotfishwithoutfallingalittleinself-respect。Ihavetrieditagainandagain。Ihaveskillatit,and,likemanyofmyfellows,acertaininstinctforit,whichrevivesfromtimetotime,butalwayswhenI
  havedoneIfeelthatitwouldhavebeenbetterifIhadnotfished。
  IthinkthatIdonotmistake。Itisafaintintimation,yetsoarethefirststreaksofmorning。Thereisunquestionablythisinstinctinmewhichbelongstothelowerordersofcreation;yetwitheveryyearIamlessafisherman,thoughwithoutmorehumanityorevenwisdom;atpresentIamnofishermanatall。ButIseethatifI
  weretoliveinawildernessIshouldagainbetemptedtobecomeafisherandhunterinearnest。Beside,thereissomethingessentiallyuncleanaboutthisdietandallflesh,andIbegantoseewherehouseworkcommences,andwhencetheendeavor,whichcostssomuch,towearatidyandrespectableappearanceeachday,tokeepthehousesweetandfreefromallillodorsandsights。Havingbeenmyownbutcherandscullionandcook,aswellasthegentlemanforwhomthedisheswereservedup,Icanspeakfromanunusuallycompleteexperience。Thepracticalobjectiontoanimalfoodinmycasewasitsuncleanness;andbesides,whenIhadcaughtandcleanedandcookedandeatenmyfish,theyseemednottohavefedmeessentially。Itwasinsignificantandunnecessary,andcostmorethanitcameto。Alittlebreadorafewpotatoeswouldhavedoneaswell,withlesstroubleandfilth。Likemanyofmycontemporaries,Ihadrarelyformanyyearsusedanimalfood,ortea,orcoffee,etc。;notsomuchbecauseofanyilleffectswhichI
  hadtracedtothem,asbecausetheywerenotagreeabletomyimagination。Therepugnancetoanimalfoodisnottheeffectofexperience,butisaninstinct。Itappearedmorebeautifultolivelowandfarehardinmanyrespects;andthoughIneverdidso,I
  wentfarenoughtopleasemyimagination。Ibelievethateverymanwhohaseverbeenearnesttopreservehishigherorpoeticfacultiesinthebestconditionhasbeenparticularlyinclinedtoabstainfromanimalfood,andfrommuchfoodofanykind。Itisasignificantfact,statedbyentomologists——IfinditinKirbyandSpence——
  that“someinsectsintheirperfectstate,thoughfurnishedwithorgansoffeeding,makenouseofthem“;andtheylayitdownas“ageneralrule,thatalmostallinsectsinthisstateeatmuchlessthaninthatoflarvae。Thevoraciouscaterpillarwhentransformedintoabutterfly……andthegluttonousmaggotwhenbecomeafly“
  contentthemselveswithadroportwoofhoneyorsomeothersweetliquid。Theabdomenunderthewingsofthebutterflystillrepresentsthelarva。Thisisthetidbitwhichtemptshisinsectivorousfate。Thegrossfeederisamaninthelarvastate;
  andtherearewholenationsinthatcondition,nationswithoutfancyorimagination,whosevastabdomensbetraythem。
  Itishardtoprovideandcooksosimpleandcleanadietaswillnotoffendtheimagination;butthis,Ithink,istobefedwhenwefeedthebody;theyshouldbothsitdownatthesametable。
  Yetperhapsthismaybedone。Thefruitseatentemperatelyneednotmakeusashamedofourappetites,norinterrupttheworthiestpursuits。Butputanextracondimentintoyourdish,anditwillpoisonyou。Itisnotworththewhiletolivebyrichcookery。
  Mostmenwouldfeelshameifcaughtpreparingwiththeirownhandspreciselysuchadinner,whetherofanimalorvegetablefood,asiseverydaypreparedforthembyothers。Yettillthisisotherwisewearenotcivilized,and,ifgentlemenandladies,arenottruemenandwomen。Thiscertainlysuggestswhatchangeistobemade。Itmaybevaintoaskwhytheimaginationwillnotbereconciledtofleshandfat。Iamsatisfiedthatitisnot。Isitnotareproachthatmanisacarnivorousanimal?True,hecananddoeslive,inagreatmeasure,bypreyingonotheranimals;butthisisamiserableway——asanyonewhowillgotosnaringrabbits,orslaughteringlambs,maylearn——andhewillberegardedasabenefactorofhisracewhoshallteachmantoconfinehimselftoamoreinnocentandwholesomediet。Whatevermyownpracticemaybe,Ihavenodoubtthatitisapartofthedestinyofthehumanrace,initsgradualimprovement,toleaveoffeatinganimals,assurelyasthesavagetribeshaveleftoffeatingeachotherwhentheycameincontactwiththemorecivilized。
  Ifonelistenstothefaintestbutconstantsuggestionsofhisgenius,whicharecertainlytrue,heseesnottowhatextremes,oreveninsanity,itmayleadhim;andyetthatway,ashegrowsmoreresoluteandfaithful,hisroadlies。Thefaintestassuredobjectionwhichonehealthymanfeelswillatlengthprevailovertheargumentsandcustomsofmankind。Nomaneverfollowedhisgeniustillitmisledhim。Thoughtheresultwerebodilyweakness,yetperhapsnoonecansaythattheconsequencesweretoberegretted,forthesewerealifeinconformitytohigherprinciples。
  Ifthedayandthenightaresuchthatyougreetthemwithjoy,andlifeemitsafragrancelikeflowersandsweet-scentedherbs,ismoreelastic,morestarry,moreimmortal——thatisyoursuccess。Allnatureisyourcongratulation,andyouhavecausemomentarilytoblessyourself。Thegreatestgainsandvaluesarefarthestfrombeingappreciated。Weeasilycometodoubtiftheyexist。Wesoonforgetthem。Theyarethehighestreality。Perhapsthefactsmostastoundingandmostrealarenevercommunicatedbymantoman。Thetrueharvestofmydailylifeissomewhatasintangibleandindescribableasthetintsofmorningorevening。Itisalittlestar-dustcaught,asegmentoftherainbowwhichIhaveclutched。
  Yet,formypart,Iwasneverunusuallysqueamish;Icouldsometimeseatafriedratwithagoodrelish,ifitwerenecessary。
  Iamgladtohavedrunkwatersolong,forthesamereasonthatI
  preferthenaturalskytoanopium-eater’sheaven。Iwouldfainkeepsoberalways;andthereareinfinitedegreesofdrunkenness。I
  believethatwateristheonlydrinkforawiseman;wineisnotsonoblealiquor;andthinkofdashingthehopesofamorningwithacupofwarmcoffee,orofaneveningwithadishoftea!Ah,howlowIfallwhenIamtemptedbythem!Evenmusicmaybeintoxicating。SuchapparentlyslightcausesdestroyedGreeceandRome,andwilldestroyEnglandandAmerica。Ofallebriosity,whodoesnotprefertobeintoxicatedbytheairhebreathes?Ihavefoundittobethemostseriousobjectiontocoarselaborslongcontinued,thattheycompelledmetoeatanddrinkcoarselyalso。
  Buttotellthetruth,Ifindmyselfatpresentsomewhatlessparticularintheserespects。Icarrylessreligiontothetable,asknoblessing;notbecauseIamwiserthanIwas,but,Iamobligedtoconfess,because,howevermuchitistoberegretted,withyearsIhavegrownmorecoarseandindifferent。Perhapsthesequestionsareentertainedonlyinyouth,asmostbelieveofpoetry。
  Mypracticeis“nowhere,“myopinionishere。NeverthelessIamfarfromregardingmyselfasoneofthoseprivilegedonestowhomtheVedreferswhenitsays,that“hewhohastruefaithintheOmnipresentSupremeBeingmayeatallthatexists,“thatis,isnotboundtoinquirewhatishisfood,orwhopreparesit;andevenintheircaseitistobeobserved,asaHindoocommentatorhasremarked,thattheVedantlimitsthisprivilegeto“thetimeofdistress。“
  Whohasnotsometimesderivedaninexpressiblesatisfactionfromhisfoodinwhichappetitehadnoshare?IhavebeenthrilledtothinkthatIowedamentalperceptiontothecommonlygrosssenseoftaste,thatIhavebeeninspiredthroughthepalate,thatsomeberrieswhichIhadeatenonahillsidehadfedmygenius。“Thesoulnotbeingmistressofherself,“saysThseng-tseu,“onelooks,andonedoesnotsee;onelistens,andonedoesnothear;oneeats,andonedoesnotknowthesavoroffood。“Hewhodistinguishesthetruesavorofhisfoodcanneverbeaglutton;hewhodoesnotcannotbeotherwise。Apuritanmaygotohisbrown-breadcrustwithasgrossanappetiteaseveranaldermantohisturtle。Notthatfoodwhichenterethintothemouthdefilethaman,buttheappetitewithwhichitiseaten。Itisneitherthequalitynorthequantity,butthedevotiontosensualsavors;whenthatwhichiseatenisnotaviandtosustainouranimal,orinspireourspirituallife,butfoodforthewormsthatpossessus。Ifthehunterhasatasteformud-turtles,muskrats,andothersuchsavagetidbits,thefineladyindulgesatasteforjellymadeofacalf’sfoot,orforsardinesfromoverthesea,andtheyareeven。Hegoestothemill-pond,shetoherpreserve-pot。Thewonderishowthey,howyouandI,canlivethisslimy,beastlylife,eatinganddrinking。
  Ourwholelifeisstartlinglymoral。Thereisneveraninstant’strucebetweenvirtueandvice。Goodnessistheonlyinvestmentthatneverfails。Inthemusicoftheharpwhichtremblesroundtheworlditistheinsistingonthiswhichthrillsus。TheharpisthetravellingpattererfortheUniverse’sInsuranceCompany,recommendingitslaws,andourlittlegoodnessisalltheassessmentthatwepay。Thoughtheyouthatlastgrowsindifferent,thelawsoftheuniversearenotindifferent,butareforeveronthesideofthemostsensitive。Listentoeveryzephyrforsomereproof,foritissurelythere,andheisunfortunatewhodoesnothearit。Wecannottouchastringormoveastopbutthecharmingmoraltransfixesus。Manyanirksomenoise,goalongwayoff,isheardasmusic,aproud,sweetsatireonthemeannessofourlives。
  Weareconsciousofananimalinus,whichawakensinproportionasourhighernatureslumbers。Itisreptileandsensual,andperhapscannotbewhollyexpelled;likethewormswhich,eveninlifeandhealth,occupyourbodies。Possiblywemaywithdrawfromit,butneverchangeitsnature。Ifearthatitmayenjoyacertainhealthofitsown;thatwemaybewell,yetnotpure。TheotherdayIpickedupthelowerjawofahog,withwhiteandsoundteethandtusks,whichsuggestedthattherewasananimalhealthandvigordistinctfromthespiritual。Thiscreaturesucceededbyothermeansthantemperanceandpurity。“Thatinwhichmendifferfrombrutebeasts,“saysMencius,“isathingveryinconsiderable;thecommonherdloseitverysoon;superiormenpreserveitcarefully。“Whoknowswhatsortoflifewouldresultifwehadattainedtopurity?
  IfIknewsowiseamanascouldteachmepurityIwouldgotoseekhimforthwith。“Acommandoverourpassions,andovertheexternalsensesofthebody,andgoodacts,aredeclaredbytheVedtobeindispensableinthemind’sapproximationtoGod。“Yetthespiritcanforthetimepervadeandcontroleverymemberandfunctionofthebody,andtransmutewhatinformisthegrossestsensualityintopurityanddevotion。Thegenerativeenergy,which,whenweareloose,dissipatesandmakesusunclean,whenwearecontinentinvigoratesandinspiresus。Chastityisthefloweringofman;andwhatarecalledGenius,Heroism,Holiness,andthelike,arebutvariousfruitswhichsucceedit。ManflowsatoncetoGodwhenthechannelofpurityisopen。Byturnsourpurityinspiresandourimpuritycastsusdown。Heisblessedwhoisassuredthattheanimalisdyingoutinhimdaybyday,andthedivinebeingestablished。Perhapsthereisnonebuthascauseforshameonaccountoftheinferiorandbrutishnaturetowhichheisallied。I
  fearthatwearesuchgodsordemigodsonlyasfaunsandsatyrs,thedivinealliedtobeasts,thecreaturesofappetite,andthat,tosomeextent,ourverylifeisourdisgrace——
  “Howhappy’shewhohathdueplaceassignedTohisbeastsanddisafforestedhismind!