anditwasthoughtformany，manydaysthathewouldnevertravelfartherthantheburying-groundofthechurchofSt。George’s，wherethetroopsshouldfireasalvooverhisgrave，andwheremanyagallantofficerliesfarawayfromhishome。
　　Here，asthepoorfellowlaytossinginhisfever，thepeoplewhowatchedhimmighthaveheardhimravingaboutAmelia。Theideathatheshouldneverseeheragaindepressedhiminhislucidhours。Hethoughthislastdaywascome，andhemadehissolemnpreparationsfordeparture，settinghisaffairsinthisworldinorderandleavingthelittlepropertyofwhichhewaspossessedtothosewhomhemostdesiredtobenefit。Thefriendinwhosehousehewaslocatedwitnessedhistestament。Hedesiredtobeburiedwithalittlebrownhair-chainwhichheworeroundhisneckandwhich，ifthetruthmustbeknown，hehadgotfromAmelia’smaidatBrussels，whentheyoungwidow’shairwascutoff，duringthefeverwhichprostratedherafterthedeathofGeorgeOsborneontheplateauatMountSt。John。
　　Herecovered，rallied，relapsedagain，havingundergonesuchaprocessofblood-lettingandcalomelasshowedthestrengthofhisoriginalconstitution。HewasalmostaskeletonwhentheyputhimonboardtheRamchunderEastIndiaman，CaptainBragg，fromCalcutta，touchingatMadras，andsoweakandprostratethathisfriendwhohadtendedhimthroughhisillnessprophesiedthatthehonestMajorwouldneversurvivethevoyage，andthathewouldpasssomemorning，shroudedinflagandhammock，overtheship’sside，andcarryingdowntotheseawithhimtherelicthatheworeathisheart。Butwhetheritwastheseaair，orthehopewhichsprungupinhimafresh，fromthedaythattheshipspreadhercanvasandstoodoutoftheroadstowardshome，ourfriendbegantoamend，andhewasquitewellthoughasgauntasagreyhoundbeforetheyreachedtheCape。”Kirkwillbedisappointedofhismajoritythistime。”hesaidwithasmile；“hewillexpecttofindhimselfgazettedbythetimetheregimentreacheshome。”ForitmustbepremisedthatwhiletheMajorwaslyingillatMadras，havingmadesuchprodigioushastetogothither，thegallant——th，whichhadpassedmanyyearsabroad，whichafteritsreturnfromtheWestIndieshadbeenbaulkedofitsstayathomebytheWaterloocampaign，andhadbeenorderedfromFlanderstoIndia，hadreceivedordershome；andtheMajormighthaveaccompaniedhiscomrades，hadhechosentowaitfortheirarrivalatMadras。
　　PerhapshewasnotinclinedtoputhimselfinhisexhaustedstateagainundertheguardianshipofGlorvina。
　　“IthinkMissO’Dowdwouldhavedoneforme。”hesaidlaughinglytoafellow-passenger，“ifwehadhadheronboard，andwhenshehadsunkme，shewouldhavefallenuponyou，dependuponit，andcarriedyouinasaprizetoSouthampton，Jos，myboy。”
　　ForindeeditwasnootherthanourstoutfriendwhowasalsoapassengeronboardtheRamchunder。HehadpassedtenyearsinBengal。Constantdinners，tiffins，palealeandclaret，theprodigiouslabourofcutcherry，andtherefreshmentofbrandy-pawneewhichhewasforcedtotakethere，hadtheireffectuponWaterlooSedley。
　　AvoyagetoEuropewaspronouncednecessaryforhim——
　　andhavingservedhisfulltimeinIndiaandhadfineappointmentswhichhadenabledhimtolaybyaconsiderablesumofmoney，hewasfreetocomehomeandstaywithagoodpension，ortoreturnandresumethatrankintheservicetowhichhisseniorityandhisvasttalentsentitledhim。
　　Hewasratherthinnerthanwhenwelastsawhim，buthadgainedinmajestyandsolemnityofdemeanour。
　　HehadresumedthemustachiostowhichhisservicesatWaterlooentitledhim，andswaggeredaboutondeckinamagnificentvelvetcapwithagoldbandandaprofuseornamentationofpinsandjewelleryabouthisperson。
　　Hetookbreakfastinhiscabinanddressedassolemnlytoappearonthequarter-deckasifheweregoingtoturnoutforBondStreet，ortheCourseatCalcutta。Hebroughtanativeservantwithhim，whowashisvaletandpipe-
　　bearerandwhoworetheSedleycrestinsilveronhisturban。ThatorientalmenialhadawretchedlifeunderthetyrannyofJosSedley。Joswasasvainofhispersonasawoman，andtookaslongatimeathistoiletteasanyfadingbeauty。Theyoungstersamongthepassengers，YoungChaffersofthe150th，andpoorlittleRicketts，cominghomeafterhisthirdfever，usedtodrawoutSedleyatthecuddy-tableandmakehimtellprodigiousstoriesabouthimselfandhisexploitsagainsttigersandNapoleon。HewasgreatwhenhevisitedtheEmperor’stombatLongwood，whentothesegentlemenandtheyoungofficersoftheship，MajorDobbinnotbeingby，hedescribedthewholebattleofWaterlooandallbutannouncedthatNapoleonneverwouldhavegonetoSaintHelenaatallbutforhim，JosSedley。
　　AfterleavingSt。Helenahebecameverygenerous，disposingofagreatquantityofshipstores，claret，preservedmeats，andgreatcaskspackedwithsoda-water，broughtoutforhisprivatedelectation。Therewerenoladiesonboard；theMajorgavethepasofprecedencytothecivilian，sothathewasthefirstdignitaryattable，andtreatedbyCaptainBraggandtheofficersoftheRamchunderwiththerespectwhichhisrankwarranted。Hedisappearedratherinapanicduringatwo-
　　days’gale，inwhichhehadtheportholesofhiscabinbatteneddown，andremainedinhiscotreadingtheWasherwomanofFinchleyCommon，leftonboardtheRamchunderbytheRightHonourabletheLadyEmilyHornblower，wifeoftheRev。SilasHornblower，whenontheirpassageouttotheCape，wheretheReverendgentlemanwasamissionary；but，forcommonreading，hehadbroughtastockofnovelsandplayswhichhelenttotherestoftheship，andrenderedhimselfagreeabletoallbyhiskindnessandcondescension。
　　Manyandmanyanightastheshipwascuttingthroughtheroaringdarksea，themoonandstarsshiningoverheadandthebellsingingoutthewatch，Mr。SedleyandtheMajorwouldsitonthequarter-deckofthevesseltalkingabouthome，astheMajorsmokedhischerootandthecivilianpuffedatthehookahwhichhisservantpreparedforhim。
　　IntheseconversationsitwaswonderfulwithwhatperseveranceandingenuityMajorDobbinwouldmanagetobringthetalkroundtothesubjectofAmeliaandherlittleboy。Jos，alittletestyabouthisfather’smisfortunesandunceremoniousapplicationstohim，wassootheddownbytheMajor，whopointedouttheelder’sillfortunesandoldage。Hewouldnotperhapsliketolivewiththeoldcouple，whosewaysandhoursmightnotagreewiththoseofayoungerman，accustomedtodifferentsocietyJosbowedatthiscompliment；but，theMajorpointedout，howadvantageousitwouldbeforJosSedleytohaveahouseofhisowninLondon，andnotamerebachelor’sestablishmentasbefore；howhissisterAmeliawouldbetheverypersontopresideoverit；howelegant，howgentleshewas，andofwhatrefinedgoodmanners。HerecountedstoriesofthesuccesswhichMrs。
　　GeorgeOsbornehadhadinformerdaysatBrussels，andinLondon，whereshewasmuchadmiredbypeopleofverygreatfashion；andhethenhintedhowbecomingitwouldbeforJostosendGeorgytoagoodschoolandmakeamanofhim，forhismotherandherparentswouldbesuretospoilhim。Inaword，thisartfulMajormadethecivilianpromisetotakechargeofAmeliaandherunprotectedchild。HedidnotknowasyetwhateventshadhappenedinthelittleSedleyfamily，andhowdeathhadremovedthemother，andricheshadcarriedoffGeorgefromAmelia。Butthefactisthateverydayandalways，thislove-smittenandmiddle-agedgentlemanwasthinkingaboutMrs。Osborne，andhiswholeheartwasbentupondoinghergood。Hecoaxed，wheedled，cajoled，andcomplimentedJosSedleywithaperseveranceandcordialityofwhichhewasnotawarehimself，verylikely；butsomemenwhohaveunmarriedsistersordaughterseven，mayrememberhowuncommonlyagreeablegentlemenaretothemalerelationswhentheyarecourtingthefemales；andperhapsthisrogueofaDobbinwasurgedbyasimilarhypocrisy。
　　Thetruthis，whenMajorDobbincameonboardtheRamchumder，verysick，andforthethreedaysshelayintheMadrasRoads，hedidnotbegintorally，nordideventheappearanceandrecognitionofhisoldacquaintance，Mr。Sedley，onboardmuchcheerhim，untilafteraconversationwhichtheyhadoneday，astheMajorwaslaidlanguidlyonthedeck。Hesaidthenhethoughthewasdoomed；hehadleftalittlesomethingtohisgodsoninhiswill，andhetrustedMrs。Osbornewouldrememberhimkindlyandbehappyinthemarriageshewasabouttomake。”Married？nottheleast。”Josanswered；
　　“hehadheardfromher：shemadenomentionofthemarriage，andbytheway，itwascurious，shewrotetosaythatMajorDobbinwasgoingtobemarried，andhopedthatHEwouldbehappy。”WhatwerethedatesofSedley’slettersfromEurope？Thecivilianfetchedthem。
　　TheyweretwomonthslaterthantheMajor’s；andtheship’ssurgeoncongratulatedhimselfuponthetreatmentadoptedbyhimtowardshisnewpatient，whohadbeenconsignedtoshipboardbytheMadraspractitionerwithverysmallhopesindeed；for，fromthatday，theverydaythathechangedthedraught，MajorDobbinbegantomend。Andthusitwasthatdeservingofficer，CaptainKirk，wasdisappointedofhismajority。
　　AftertheypassedSt。Helena，MajorDobbin’sgaietyandstrengthwassuchastoastonishallhisfellowpassengers。Helarkedwiththemidshipmen，playedsingle-
　　stickwiththemates，ranuptheshroudslikeaboy，sangacomicsongonenighttotheamusementofthewholepartyassembledovertheirgrogaftersupper，andrenderedhimselfsogay，lively，andamiablethatevenCaptainBragg，whothoughttherewasnothinginhispassenger，andconsideredhewasapoor-spiritedfelleratfirst，wasconstrainedtoownthattheMajorwasareservedbutwell-informedandmeritoriousofficer。”Heain’tgotdistangymanners，dammy。”Braggobservedtohisfirstmate；“hewouldn’tdoatGovernmentHouse，Roper，wherehisLordshipandLadyWilliamwasaskindtome，andshookhandswithmebeforethewholecompany，andaskingmeatdinnertotakebeerwithhim，beforetheCommander-in-Chiefhimself；heain’tgotmanners，butthere’ssomethingabouthim——“AndthusCaptainBraggshowedthathepossesseddiscriminationasaman，aswellasabilityasacommander。
　　ButacalmtakingplacewhentheRamchunderwaswithintendays’sailofEngland，Dobbinbecamesoimpatientandill-humouredastosurprisethosecomradeswhohadbeforeadmiredhisvivacityandgoodtemper。
　　Hedidnotrecoveruntilthebreezesprangupagain，andwasinahighlyexcitedstatewhenthepilotcameonboard。GoodGod，howhisheartbeatasthetwofriendlyspiresofSouthamptoncameinsight。
　　OurFriendtheMajorOurMajorhadrenderedhimselfsopopularonboardtheRamchunderthatwhenheandMr。Sedleydescendedintothewelcomeshore-boatwhichwastotakethemfromtheship，thewholecrew，menandofficers，thegreatCaptainBragghimselfleadingoff，gavethreecheersforMajorDobbin，whoblushedverymuchandduckedhisheadintokenofthanks。Jos，whoverylikelythoughtthecheerswereforhimself，tookoffhisgold-lacedcapandwaveditmajesticallytohisfriends，andtheywerepulledtoshoreandlandedwithgreatdignityatthepier，whencetheyproceededtotheRoyalGeorgeHotel。
　　Althoughthesightofthatmagnificentroundofbeef，andthesilvertankardsuggestiveofrealBritishhome-
　　brewedaleandporter，whichperenniallygreettheeyesofthetravellerreturningfromforeignpartswhoentersthecoffee-roomoftheGeorge，aresoinvigoratinganddelightfulthatamanenteringsuchacomfortablesnughomelyEnglishinnmightwellliketostopsomedaysthere，yetDobbinbegantotalkaboutapost-chaiseinstantly，andwasnosooneratSouthamptonthanhewishedtobeontheroadtoLondon。Jos，however，wouldnothearofmovingthatevening。Whywashetopassanightinapost-chaiseinsteadofagreatlargeundulatingdownyfeather-bedwhichwastherereadytoreplacethehorridlittlenarrowcribinwhichtheportlyBengalgentlemanhadbeenconfinedduringthevoyage？Hecouldnotthinkofmovingtillhisbaggagewascleared，oroftravellinguntilhecoulddosowithhischillum。SotheMajorwasforcedtowaitoverthatnight，anddispatchedalettertohisfamilyannouncinghisarrival，entreatingfromJosapromisetowritetohisownfriends。Jospromised，butdidn’tkeephispromise。TheCaptain，thesurgeon，andoneortwopassengerscameanddinedwithourtwogentlemenattheinn，JosexertinghimselfinasumptuouswayinorderingthedinnerandpromisingtogototownthenextdaywiththeMajor。
　　ThelandlordsaiditdidhiseyesgoodtoseeMr。Sedleytakeoffhisfirstpintofporter。IfIhadtimeanddaredtoenterintodigressions，IwouldwriteachapteraboutthatfirstpintofporterdrunkuponEnglishground。Ah，howgooditis！Itisworth-whiletoleavehomeforayear，justtoenjoythatonedraught。
　　MajorDobbinmadehisappearancethenextmorningveryneatlyshavedanddressed，accordingtohiswont。
　　Indeed，itwassoearlyinthemorningthatnobodywasupinthehouseexceptthatwonderfulBootsofaninnwhoneverseemstowantsleep；andtheMajorcouldhearthesnoresofthevariousinmatesofthehouseroaringthroughthecorridorsashecreakedaboutinthosedimpassages。ThenthesleeplessBootswentshirkingroundfromdoortodoor，gatheringupateachtheBluchers，Wellingtons，Oxonians，whichstoodoutside。ThenJos’snativeservantaroseandbegantogetreadyhismaster’sponderousdressingapparatusandpreparehishookah；thenthemaidservantsgotup，andmeetingthedarkmaninthepassages，shrieked，andmistookhimforthedevil。HeandDobbinstumbledovertheirpailsinthepassagesastheywerescouringthedecksoftheRoyalGeorge。Whenthefirstunshornwaiterappearedandunbarredthedooroftheinn，theMajorthoughtthatthetimefordeparturewasarrived，andorderedapost-
　　chaisetobefetchedinstantly，thattheymightsetoff。
　　HethendirectedhisstepstoMr。Sedley’sroomandopenedthecurtainsofthegreatlargefamilybedwhereinMr。Joswassnoring。”Come，up！Sedley。”theMajorsaid，“it’stimetobeoff；thechaisewillbeatthedoorinhalfanhour。”
　　Josgrowledfromunderthecounterpanetoknowwhatthetimewas；butwhenheatlastextortedfromtheblushingMajorwhonevertoldfibs，howevertheymightbetohisadvantagewhatwastherealhourofthemorning，hebrokeoutintoavolleyofbadlanguage，whichwewillnotrepeathere，butbywhichhegaveDobbintounderstandthathewouldjeopardyhissoulifhegotupatthatmoment，thattheMajormightgoandbehanged，thathewouldnottravelwithDobbin，andthatitwasmostunkindandungentlemanliketodisturbamanoutofhissleepinthatway；onwhichthediscomfitedMajorwasobligedtoretreat，leavingJostoresumehisinterruptedslumbers。
　　Thechaisecameuppresently，andtheMajorwouldwaitnolonger。
　　IfhehadbeenanEnglishnoblemantravellingonapleasuretour，oranewspapercourierbearingdispatchesgovernmentmessagesaregenerallycarriedmuchmorequietly，hecouldnothavetravelledmorequickly。Thepost-boyswonderedatthefeesheflungamongstthem。