Almostatthecommencementofthefirstletter，Ihadtheunexpectedpleasureofseeinghimblush；butheimmediatelyturnedhisbacktomeandfinishedtheperusalatthewindow。Atthesecond，Isawhim，onceortwice，raisehishandandhurriedlypassitacrosshisface。Coulditbetodashawayatear？Whenhehaddone，therewasanintervalspentinclearinghisthroatandstaringoutofthewindow，andthen，afterwhistlingafewbarsofafavouriteair，heturnedround，gavemebackthelettersandsilentlyshookmebythehand。
　　`I’vebeenacursedrascal，Godknows，’saidheashegaveitaheartysqueeze，`butyouseeifIdon’tmakeamendsforit——G——dd——nmeifIdon’t！’
　　`Don’tcurseyourself，Mr。Hattersley；ifGodhadheardhalfyourinvocationsofthatkind，youwouldhavebeeninhelllongbeforenow——andyoucannotmakeamendsforthepastbydoingyourdutyforthefuture，inasmuchasyourdutyisonlywhatyouowetoyourMaker，andyoucannotdomorethanfulfilit——anothermustmakeamendsforyourpastdelinquencies。
　　Ifyouintendtoreform，invokeGod’sblessing，Hismercy，andHisaid；
　　notHiscurse。
　　`Godhelpme，then——forI’msureIneedit——Where’sMilicent？’
　　`She’sthere，justcominginwithhersister。’
　　Hesteppedoutattheglassdoor，andwenttomeetthem。Ifollowedatalittledistance。Somewhattohiswife’sastonishment，heliftedherofffromthegroundandsalutedherwithaheartykissandastrongembrace；
　　then，placinghistwohandsonhershoulders，hegaveher，Isuppose，asketchofthegreatthingshemeanttodo，forshesuddenlythrewherarmsroundhimandburstintotears，exclaiming，——
　　`Do，do，Ralph——weshallbesohappy！Howvery，verygoodyouare！’
　　`Nay，notI，’saidhe，turningherroundandpushinghertowardsme。`Thankher，it’sherdoing。’
　　Milicentflewtothankme，overflowingwithgratitude。Idisclaimedalltitletoit，tellingherherhusbandwaspredisposedtoamendmentbeforeIaddedmymiteofexhortationandencouragement，andthatIhadonlydonewhatshemight——andoughtto——havedoneherself。
　　`Oh，no！’criedshe，`Icouldn’thaveinfluencedhim，I’msure，byanythingthatIcouldhavesaid。Ishouldonlyhavebotheredhimbymyclumsyeffortsatpersuasion，ifIhadmadetheattempt。
　　`Younevertriedme，Milly，’saidhe。
　　Shortlyafter，theytooktheirleave。TheyarenowgoneonavisittoHattersley’sfather。Afterthat，theywillrepairtotheircountryhome。
　　Ihopehisgoodresolutionswillnotfallthrough，andpoorMilicentwillnotbeagaindisappointed。Herlastletterwasfullofpresentblissandpleasinganticipationsforthefuture；butnoparticulartemptationhasyetoccurredtoputhisvirtuetothetest。Henceforth，however，shewilldoubtlessbesomewhatlesstimidandreserved，andhemorekindandthoughtful——Surely，then，herhopesarenotunfounded；andIhaveonebrightspot，atleast，whereontorestmythoughts。
　　TheTenantofWildfellHall：Chapter43CHAPTERXLIIITHEBOUNDARYPASTOctober10th——Mr。Huntingdonreturnedaboutthreeweeksago。Hisappearance，hisdemeanourandconversation，andmyfeelingswithregardtohim，Ishallnottroublemyselftodescribe。Thedayafterhisarrival，however，hesurprisedmebytheannouncementofanintentiontoprocureagovernessforlittleArthur：Itoldhimitwasquiteunnecessary，nottosayridiculous，atthepresentseason：IthoughtIwasfullycompetenttothetaskofteachinghimmyself——forsomeyearstocome，atleast：thechild’seducationwastheonlypleasureandbusinessofmylife；andsincehehaddeprivedmeofeveryotheroccupation，hemightsurelyleavemethat。
　　HesaidIwasnotfittoteachchildren，ortobewiththem：I
　　hadalreadyreducedtheboytolittlebetterthananautomaton，Ihadbrokenhisfinespiritwithmyrigidseverity；andIshouldfreezeallthesunshineoutofhisheart，andmakehimasgloomyanasceticasmyself，ifIhadthehandlingofhimmuchlonger。AndpoorRachel，too，cameinforhershareofabuse，asusual；hecannotendureRachel，becauseheknowsshehasaproperappreciationofhim。
　　Icalmlydefendedourseveralqualificationsasnurseandgoverness，andstillresistedtheproposedadditiontoourfamily；buthecutmeshortbysaying，itwasnousebotheringaboutthematter，forhehadengagedagovernessalready，andshewascomingnextweek；sothatallIhadtodowastogetthingsreadyforherreception。Thiswasaratherstartlingpieceofintelligence。Iventuredtoinquirehernameandaddress，bywhomshehadbeenrecommended，orhowhehadbeenledtomakechoiceofher。
　　`Sheisaveryestimable，piousyoungperson，’saidhe；`youneedn’tbeafraid。HernameisMyers，Ibelieve；andshewasrecommendedtomebyarespectableolddowager-ladyofhighreputeinthereligiousworld。
　　Ihavenotseenhermyself，andthereforecannotgiveyouaparticularaccountofherpersonandconversation，andsoforth；but，iftheoldlady’seulogiesarecorrect，youwillfindhertopossessalldesirablequalificationsforherposition——aninordinateloveofchildrenamongtherest。’
　　Allthiswasgravelyandquietlyspoken，buttherewasalaughingdemoninhishalf-avertedeyethatbodednogoodIimagined。However，I
　　thoughtofmyasylumin——hire，andmadenofurtherobjections。
　　WhenMissMyersarrived，Iwasnotpreparedtogiveheraverycordialreception。Herappearancewasnotparticularlycalculatedtoproduceafavourableimpressionatfirstsight，nordidhermannersandsubsequentconduct，inanydegree，removetheprejudiceIhadalreadyconceivedagainsther。Herattainmentswerelimited，herintellectnowaysabovemediocrity。
　　Shehadafinevoice，andcouldsinglikeanightingale，andaccompanyherselfsufficientlywellonthepiano；butthesewereheronlyaccomplishments。
　　Therewasalookofguileandsubtletyinherface，asoundofitinhervoice。Sheseemedafraidofme，andwouldstartifIsuddenlyapproachedher。Inherbehaviour，shewasrespectfulandcomplaisanteventoservility：
　　sheattemptedtoflatterandfawnuponmeatfirst，butIsooncheckedthat。Herfondnessforherlittlepupilwasoverstrained，andIwasobligedtoremonstratewithheronthesubjectofover-indulgenceandinjudiciouspraise；butshecouldnotgainhisheart。Herpietyconsistedinanoccasionalheavingofsighsandupliftingofeyestotheceiling，andtheutteranceofafewcantphrases。Shetoldmeshewasaclergyman’sdaughter，andhadbeenleftanorphanfromherchildhood，buthadhadthegoodfortunetoobtainasituationinaverypiousfamily；andthenshespokesogratefullyofthekindnessshehadexperiencedfromitsdifferentmembersthatIreproachedmyselfformyuncharitablethoughtsandunfriendlyconduct，andrelentedforatime——butnotforlong；mycausesofdislikeweretoorational，mysuspicionstoowellfoundedforthat；andIknewitwasmydutytowatchandscrutinizetillthosesuspicionswereeithersatisfactorilyremovedorconfirmed。
　　Iaskedthenameandresidenceofthekindandpiousfamily。Shementionedacommonname，andanunknownanddistantplaceofabode，buttoldmetheywerenowontheContinent，andtheirpresentaddresswasunknowntoher。IneversawherspeakmuchtoMr。Huntingdon；buthewouldfrequentlylookintotheschool-roomtoseehowlittleArthurgotonwithhisnewcompanion，whenIwasnotthere。Intheevening，shesatwithusinthedrawing-room，andwouldsingandplaytoamusehim——orus，asshepretended——andwasveryattentivetohiswants，andwatchfultoanticipatethem，thoughsheonlytalkedtome——indeed，hewasseldominaconditiontobetalkedto。Hadshebeenotherthanshewas，Ishouldhavefeltherpresenceagreatrelieftocomebetweenusthus，except，indeed，thatIshouldhavebeenthoroughlyashamedforanydecentpersontoseehimasheoftenwas。
　　IdidnotmentionmysuspicionstoRachel；butshe，havingsojournedforhalfacenturyinthislandofsinandsorrow，haslearnedtobesuspiciousherself。Shetoldmefromthefirstshewas`downof’thatnewgoverness，’
　　andIsoonfoundshewatchedherquiteasnarrowlyasIdid；andIwasgladofit，forIlongedtoknowthetruth：theatmosphereofGrassdaleseemedtostifleme，andIcouldonlylivebythinkingofWildfellHall。
　　Atlast，onemorning，sheenteredmychamberwithsuchintelligencethatmyresolutionwastakenbeforeshehadceasedtospeak。Whileshedressedme，IexplainedtohermyintentionsandwhatassistanceIshouldrequirefromher，andtoldherwhichofmythingsshewastopackup，andwhatshewastoleavebehindforherself，asIhadnoothermeansofrecompencingherforthissuddendismissal，afterherlongandfaithfulservice——acircumstanceImostdeeplyregrettedbutcouldnotavoid。
　　`Andwhatwillyoudo，Rachel？’saidI——`willyougohome，orseekanotherplace？’
　　`Ihavenohome，ma’am，butwithyou，’shereplied；`andifI
　　leaveyou，I’llnevergointoplaceagainaslongasIlive。’
　　`ButIcan’taffordtolivelikealady，now，’returnedI：`I
　　mustbemyownmaidandmychild’snurse。
　　`Whatsignifies？’repliedsheinsomeexcitement。`You’llwantsomebodytocleanandwash，andcook，won’tyou？Icandoallthat；andnevermindthewages——I’vemybitso’savingsyet，andifyouwouldn’ttakeme，Ishouldhavetofindmyownboardandlodgingoutof`emsomewhere，orelseworkamongstrangers——andit’swhatI’mnotusedtooyoucanpleaseyourselfma’am。’Hervoicequaveredasshespoke，andthetearsstoodinhereyes。
　　`Ishouldlikeitaboveallthings，Rachel，andI’dgiveyousuchwagesasIcouldafford——suchasIshouldgivetoanyservantofallworkImightemploy；butdon’tyouseeIshouldbedraggingyoudownwithme，whenyouhavedonenothingtodeserveit？’
　　`Oh，fiddle！’ejaculatedshe。
　　`Andbesides，myfuturewayoflivingwillbesowidelydifferenttothepast——sodifferenttoallyouhavebeenaccustomedto——’
　　`Doyouthink，ma’am，Ican’tbearwhatmymissiscan？——surelyI’mnotsoproudandsodaintyasthatcomestendmylittlemastertoo，Godblesshim？’
　　`ButI’myoung，Rachel；Ishan’tmindit；andArthurisyoungtoo——itwillbenothingtohim。’
　　`Normeeither：I’mnotsooldbutwhatIcanstandhardfareandhardwork，ifit’sonlytohelpandcomfortthemasI’velovedlikemyownbarns——forallI’mtoooldtobidethethoughtso’leaving`emintroubleanddanger，andgoingamongststrangersmyself。’
　　`Thenyoushan’t，Rachel！’criedI，embracingmyfaithfulfriend。
　　`We’llallgotogether，andyoushallseehowthenewlifesuitsyou。
　　`Blessyou，honey！’criedsheaffectionatelyreturningmyembrace。
　　`Onlyletusgetshutofthiswickedhouseandwe’lldorightenough，you’llsee。’
　　`SothinkI，’wasmyanswer；——andsothatpointwassettled。
　　Bythatmorning’spost，IdespatchedafewhastylinestoFrederick，beseechinghimtopreparemyasylumformyimmediatereception——forIshouldprobablycometoclaimitwithinadayafterthereceiptofthatnote，——andtellinghiminfewwords，thecauseofmysuddenresolution。Ithenwrotethreelettersofadieu：thefirsttoEstherHargrave，inwhichItoldherthatIfounditimpossibletostayanylongeratGrassdale，ortoleavemysonunderhisfather’sprotection；and，asitwasofthelastimportancethatourfutureabodeshouldbeunknowntohimandhisacquaintance，I
　　shoulddiscloseittonoonebutmybrother，throughthemediumofwhomIhopedstilltocorrespondwithmyfriends。Ithengaveherhisaddress，exhortedhertowritefrequently，reiteratedsomeofmyformeradmonitionsregardingherownconcerns，andhadeherafondfarewell。
　　ThesecondwastoMilicent；muchtothesameeffect，butalittlemoreconfidential，asbefittedourlongerintimacy，andhergreaterexperienceandbetteracquaintancewithmycircumstances。
　　Thethirdwastomyauntsmuchmoredifficultandpainfulundertaking，andthereforeIhadleftittothelast；butImustgivehersomeexplanationofthatextraordinarystepIhadtaken，——andthatquickly，forsheandmyunclewouldnodoubthearofitwithinadayortwoaftermydisappearance，asitwasprobablethatMr。Huntingdonwouldspeedilyapplytothemtoknowwhatwasbecomeofme。Atlasthowever，ItoldherIwassensibleofmyerror：Ididnotcomplainofitspunishment，andIwassorrytotroublemyfriendswithitsconsequences；butindutytomyson，Imustsubmitnolonger；itwasabsolutelynecessarythatheshouldbedeliveredfromhisfather’scorruptinginfluence。Ishouldnotdisclosemyplaceofrefugeeventoher，inorderthatsheandmyunclemightbeable，withtruth，todenyallknowledgeconcerningit；butanycommunicationsaddressedtomeundercovertomybrother，wouldbecertaintoreachme。IhopedsheandmyunclewouldpardonthestepIhadtaken，foriftheyknewall，I
　　wassuretheywouldnotblameme；andItrustedtheywouldnotafflictthemselvesonmyaccount，forifIcouldonlyreachmyretreatinsafetyandkeepitunmolested，Ishouldbeveryhappy，butforthethoughtsofthem；andshouldbequitecontentedtospendmylifeinobscurity，devotingmyselftothetrainingupofmychild，andteachinghimtoavoidtheerrorsofbothhisparents。