首页 >出版文学> The Wrecker>第40章

第40章

  Itookitinadream。“Thishasbeenadevilofabusiness。”saidI。
  “Don’tthinkhardofMamie。”hepleaded。“It’sthewayshe’smade;it’sherhigh-tonedloyalty。AndofcourseIknowit’sallright。Iknowyoursterlingcharacter;butyoudidn’t,somehow,makeouttogiveusthethingstraight,Loudon。Anybodymighthave——Imeanit——Imean——“
  “Nevermindwhatyoumean,mypoorJim。”saidI。“She’sagallantlittlewomanandaloyalwife:andIthoughthersplendid。Mystorywasasfishyasthedevil。I’llneverthinkthelessofeitherheroryou。”
  “It’llblowover;itmustblowover。”saidhe。
  “Itnevercan。”Ireturned,sighing:“anddon’tyoutrytomakeit!Don’tnameme,unlessit’swithanoath。Andgethometoherrightaway。Goodby,mybestoffriends。Goodby,andGodblessyou。Weshallnevermeetagain。”
  “OLoudon,thatweshouldlivetosaysuchwords!”hecried。
  Ihadnoviewsonlife,beyondanoccasionalimpulsetocommitsuicide,ortogetdrunk,anddrifteddownthestreet,semi-
  conscious,walkingapparentlyonair,inthelight-headednessofgrief。Ihadmoneyinmypocket,whethermineormycreditors’
  Ihadnomeansofguessing;and,thePoodleDoglyinginmypath,Iwentmechanicallyinandtookatable。Awaiterattendedme,andIsupposeIgavemyorders;forpresentlyI
  foundmyself,withasuddenreturnofconsciousness,beginningdinner。Onthewhiteclothatmyelbowlaytheletter,addressedinaclerk’shand,andbearinganEnglishstampandtheEdinburghpostmark。Abowlofbouillonandaglassofwineawakenedinonecornerofmybrainwherealltherestwasinmourning,theblindsdownasforafuneralafaintstirofcuriosity;andwhileIwaitedthenextcourse,wonderingthewhilewhatIhadordered,Iopenedandbegantoreadtheepoch-makingdocument。
  “DEARSIR:Iamchargedwiththemelancholydutyofannouncingtoyouthedeathofyourexcellentgrandfather,Mr。
  AlexanderLoudon,onthe17thult。OnSundaythe13th,hewenttochurchasusualintheforenoon,andstoppedonhiswayhome,atthecornerofPrincesStreet,inoneofourseasonableeastwinds,totalkwithanoldfriend。Thesameeveningacutebronchitisdeclareditself;fromthefirst,Dr。
  M’Combieanticipatedafatalresult,andtheoldgentlemanappearedtohavenoillusionastohisownstate。Herepeatedlyassuredmeitwas’by’withhimnow;’andhightime,too,’heonceaddedwithcharacteristicasperity。Hewasnotintheleastchangedontheapproachofdeath:onlywhatIamsuremustbeverygratefultoyourfeelingsheseemedtothinkandspeakevenmorekindlythanusualofyourself:referringtoyouas’Jeannie’syin,’withstrongexpressionsofregard。’HewastheonlyoneIeverliketofthehalejing-bang,’wasoneofhisexpressions;andyouwillbegladtoknowthathedweltparticularlyonthedutifulrespectyouhadalwaysdisplayedinyourrelations。Thesmallcodicil,bywhichhebequeathsyouhisMolesworthandotherprofessionalworks,wasaddedyouwillobserveonthedaybeforehisdeath;sothatyouwereinhisthoughtsuntiltheend。Ishouldsaythat,thoughratheratryingpatient,hewasmosttenderlynursedbyyouruncle,andyourcousin,MissEuphemia。Iencloseacopyofthetestament,bywhichyouwillseethatyoushareequallywithMr。Adam,andthatIholdatyourdisposalasumnearlyapproachingseventeenthousandpounds。Ibegtocongratulateyouonthisconsiderableacquisition,andexpectyourorders,towhichI
  shallhastentogivemybestattention。Thinkingthatyoumightdesiretoreturnatoncetothiscountry,andnotknowinghowyoumaybeplaced,Iencloseacreditforsixhundredpounds。
  Pleasesigntheaccompanyingslip,andletmehaveitatyourearliestconvenience。
  “Iam,dearsir,yourstruly,“W。RUTHERFORDGREGG。”
  “Godblesstheoldgentleman!”Ithought;“andforthatmatterGodblessUncleAdam!andmycousinEuphemia!andMr。
  Gregg!”Ihadavisionofthatgreyoldlifenowbroughttoanend——“andhightimetoo“——avisionofthoseSabbathstreetsalternatelyvacantandfilledwithsilentpeople;ofthebabelofthebells,thelong-drawnpsalmody,theshrewdstingoftheeastwind,thehollow,echoing,drearyhousetowhich“Ecky“
  hadreturnedwiththehandofdeathalreadyonhisshoulder;avision,too,ofthelong,roughcountrylad,perhapsaseriouscourtierofthelassesinthehawthornden,perhapsarusticdanceronthegreen,whohadfirstearnedandansweredtothatharshdiminutive。AndIaskedmyselfif,onthewhole,poorEckyhadsucceededinlife;ifthelaststateofthatmanwerenotonthewholeworsethanthefirst;andthehouseinRandolphCrescentalessadmirabledwellingthanthehamletwherehesawthedayandgrewtomanhood。Herewasaconsolatorythoughtforonewhowashimselfafailure。
  Yes,Ideclarethewordcameinmymind;andallthewhile,inanotherpartitionofthebrain,Iwasglowingandsingingformynew-foundopulence。Thepileofgold——fourthousandtwohundredandfiftydoubleeagles,seventeenthousanduglysovereigns,twenty-onethousandtwohundredandfiftyNapoleons——danced,andrangandranmolten,andlituplifewiththeireffulgence,intheeyeoffancy。Herewereallthingsmadeplaintome:Paradise——Paris,Imean——Regained,Carthewprotected,Jimrestored,thecreditors。
  “Thecreditors!”Irepeated,andsankbackbenumbed。Itwasalltheirstothelastfarthing:mygrandfatherhaddiedtoosoontosaveme。
  Imusthavesomewherearareveinofdecision。Inthatrevolutionarymoment,Ifoundmyselfpreparedforallextremesexcepttheone:readytodoanything,ortogoanywhere,solongasImightsavemymoney。Attheworst,therewasflight,flighttosomeofthoseblestcountrieswheretheserpent,extradition,hasnotyetenteredin。
  OnnoconditionisextraditionAllowedinCallao!——
  theoldlawlesswordshauntedme;andIsawmyselfhuggingmygoldinthecompanyofsuchmenashadoncemadeandsungthem,intherudeandbloodywharfsidedrinking-shopsofChiliandPeru。Therunofmyill-luck,thebreachofmyoldfriendship,thisbubblefortuneflauntedforamomentinmyeyesandsnatchedagain,hadmademedesperateandintheexpressivevulgarismugly。Todrinkvilespiritsamongvilecompanionsbytheflareofapine-torch;togoburthenedwithmyfurtivetreasureinabelt;tofightforitknifeinhand,rollingonaclayfloor;tofleeperpetuallyinfreshshipsandtobechasedthroughtheseafromisletoisle,seemed,inmythenframeofmind,awelcomeseriesofevents。
  Thatwasfortheworst;butitbegantodawnslowlyonmymindthattherewasyetapossiblebetter。Onceescaped,oncesafeinCallao,Imightapproachmycreditorswithagoodgrace;andproperlyhandledbyacunningagent,itwasjustpossibletheymightacceptsomeeasycomposition。Thehoperecalledmetothebankruptcy。Itwasstrange,Ireflected:oftenasIhadquestionedJim,hehadneverobligedmewithananswer。Inhishastefornewsaboutthewreck,myownnolesslegitimatecuriosityhadgonedisappointed。Hatefulasthethoughtwastome,ImustreturnatonceandfindoutwhereI
  stood。
  Ileftmydinnerstillunfinished,payingforthewhole,ofcourse,andtossingthewaiteragoldpiece。Iwasreckless;I
  knewnotwhatwasmineandcarednot:ImusttakewhatI
  couldgetandgiveasIwasable;torobandtosquanderseemedthecomplementarypartsofmynewdestiny。IwalkedupBushStreet,whistling,brazeningmyselftoconfrontMamieinthefirstplace,andtheworldatlargeandacertainvisionaryjudgeuponabenchinthesecond。Justoutside,Istoppedandlightedacigartogivemegreatercountenance;andpuffingthisandwearingwhatIamsurewasawretchedassumptionofbraggadocio,Ireappearedonthesceneofmydisgrace。
  Myfriendandhiswifewerefinishingapoormeal——ragsofoldmutton,theremaindercakesfrombreakfasteatencold,andastarvelingpotofcoffee。
  “Ibegyourpardon,Mrs。Pinkerton。”saidI。“Sorrytoinflictmypresencewhereitcannotbedesired;butthereisapieceofbusinessnecessarytobediscussed。”
  “Praydonotconsiderme。”saidMamie,rising,andshesailedintotheadjoiningbedroom。
  Jimwatchedhergoandshookhishead;helookedmiserablyoldandill。
  “Whatisit,now?”heasked。
  “Perhapsyourememberyouanswerednoneofmyquestions。”
  saidI。
  “Yourquestions?”falteredJim。
  “Evenso,Jim。Myquestions。”Irepeated。“Iputquestionsaswellasyourself;andhoweverlittleImayhavesatisfiedMamiewithmyanswers,Ibegtoremindyouthatyougavemenoneatall。”
  “Youmeanaboutthebankruptcy?”askedJim。
  Inodded。
  Hewrithedinhischair。“Thestraighttruthis,Iwasashamed。”
  hesaid。“Iwastryingtododgeyou。I’vebeenplayingfastandloosewithyou,Loudon;I’vedeceivedyoufromthefirst,I
  blushtoownit。AndhereyoucamehomeandputtheveryquestionIwasfearing。Whydidwebustsosoon?Yourkeenbusinesseyehadnotdeceivedyou。That’sthepoint,that’smyshame;that’swhatkilledmethisafternoonwhenMamiewastreatingyouso,andmyconsciencewastellingmeallthetime,Thouarttheman。”
  “Whatwasit,Jim?”Iasked。
  “WhatIhadbeenatallthetime,Loudon。”hewailed;“andI
  don’tknowhowI’mtolookyouinthefaceandsayit,aftermyduplicity。Itwasstocks。”headdedinawhisper。
  “Andyouwereafraidtotellmethat!”Icried。“Youpoor,old,cheerlessdreamer!whatwoulditmatterwhatyoudidordidn’t?
  Can’tyouseewe’redoomed?Andanyway,that’snotmypoint。
  It’showIstandthatIwanttoknow。Thereisaparticularreason。AmIclear?HaveIacertificate,orwhathaveItodotogetone?Andwhenwillitbedated?Youcan’tthinkwhathangsbyit!”
  “That’stheworstofall。”saidJim,likeamaninadream,“I
  can’tseehowtotellhim!”
  “Whatdoyoumean?”Icried,asmallpangofterroratmyheart。
  “I’mafraidIsacrificedyou,Loudon。”hesaid,lookingatmepitifully。
  “Sacrificedme?”Irepeated。“How?Whatdoyoumeanbysacrifice?”
  “Iknowit’llshockyourdelicateself-respect。”hesaid;“butwhatwasItodo?Thingslookedsobad。Thereceiver——“asusual,thenamestuckinhisthroat,andhebeganafresh。
  “Therewasalotoftalk;thereporterswereaftermealready;
  therewasthetroubleandallabouttheMexicanbusiness;andI
  gotscaredrightout,andIguessIlostmyhead。Youweren’tthere,yousee,andthatwasmytemptation。”
  Ididnotknowhowlonghemightthusbeataboutthebushwithdreadfulhintings,andIwasalreadybesidemyselfwithterror。Whathadhedone?Isawhehadbeentempted;Iknewfromhislettersthathewasinnoconditiontoresist。Howhadhesacrificedtheabsent?
  “Jim。”Isaid,“youmustspeakrightout。I’vegotallthatIcancarry。”
  “Well。”hesaid——“Iknowitwasaliberty——Imadeitoutyouwerenobusinessman,onlyastone-brokepainter;thathalfthetimeyoudidn’tknowanythinganyway,particularlymoneyandaccounts。Isaidyounevercouldbegottounderstandwhosewaswhose。Ihadtosaythatbecauseofsomeentriesinthebooks——“
  “ForGod’ssake。”Icried,“putmeoutofthisagony!Whatdidyouaccusemeof?”
  “Accuseyouof?”repeatedJim。“OfwhatI’mtellingyou。Andtherebeingnodeedofpartnership,ImadeoutyouwereonlyakindofclerkthatIcalledapartnerjusttogiveyoutaffy;andsoIgotyourankedacreditorontheestateforyourwagesandthemoneyyouhadlent。And——“
  IbelieveIreeled。“Acreditor!”Iroared;“acreditor!I’mnotinthebankruptcyatall?”
  “No。”saidJim。“Iknowitwasaliberty——“
  “O,damnyourliberty!readthat。”Icried,dashingtheletterbeforehimonthetable,“andcallinyourwife,andbedonewitheatingthistruck“——asIspoke,Islungthecoldmuttonintheemptygrate——“andlet’sallgoandhaveachampagnesupper。I’vedined——I’msureIdon’trememberwhatIhad;I’ddineagaintenscoresoftimesuponanightlikethis。Readit,youblayingass!I’mnotinsane。Here,Mamie。”Icontinued,openingthebedroomdoor,“comeoutandmakeitupwithme,andgoandkissyourhusband;andI’lltellyouwhat,afterthesupper,let’sgotosomeplacewherethere’saband,andI’llwaltzwithyoutillsunrise。”
  “Whatdoesitallmean?”criedJim。
  “Itmeanswehaveachampagnesupperto-night,andallgotoNapaValleyortoMontereyto-morrow。”saidI。“Mamie,goandgetyourthingson;andyou,Jim,sitdownrightwhereyouare,takeasheetofpaper,andtellFranklinDodgetogotoTexas。Mamie,youwereright,mydear;Iwasrichallthetime,anddidn’tknowit。”