首页 >出版文学> THE WOMAN IN WHITE>第110章

第110章

  Youwerealittleboy,Isuppose,intheyeartwenty-seven?Iwasahandsomeyoungwomanatthattime,livingatOldWelmingham。Ihadacontemptiblefoolforahusband。Ihadalsothehonourofbeingacquaintednevermindhowwithacertaingentlemannevermindwhom。Ishallnotcallhimbyhisname。WhyshouldI?Itwasnothisown。Heneverhadaname:youknowthat,bythistime,aswellasIdo。
  Itwillbemoretothepurposetotellyouhowheworkedhimselfintomygoodgraces。Iwasbornwiththetastesofalady,andhegratifiedthem——inotherwords,headmiredme,andhemademepresents。Nowomancanresistadmirationandpresents——especiallypresents,providedtheyhappentobejustthethingshewants。Hewassharpenoughtoknowthat——mostmenare。Naturallyhewantedsomethinginreturn——allmendo。
  Andwhatdoyouthinkwasthesomething?Themeresttrifle。Nothingbutthekeyofthevestry,andthekeyofthepressinsideit,whenmyhusband’sbackwasturned。OfcourseheliedwhenIaskedhimwhyhewishedmetogethimthekeysinthatprivateway。Hemighthavesavedhimselfthetrouble——Ididn’tbelievehim。ButIlikedmypresents,andIwantedmore。SoIgothimthekeys,withoutmyhusband’sknowledge,andIwatchedhim,withouthisownknowledge。Once,twice,fourtimesIwatchedhim,andthefourthtimeIfoundhimout。
  Iwasneverover-scrupulouswhereotherpeople’saffairswereconcerned,andIwasnotover-scrupulousabouthisaddingonetothemarriagesintheregisteronhisownaccount。
  OfcourseIknewitwaswrong,butitdidnoharmtome,whichwasonegoodreasonfornotmakingafussaboutit。AndIhadnotgotagoldwatchandchain,whichwasanother,stillbetter——andhehadpromisedmeonefromLondononlythedaybefore,whichwasathird,bestofall。
  IfIhadknownwhatthelawconsideredthecrimetobe,andhowthelawpunishedit,Ishouldhavetakenpropercareofmyself,andhaveexposedhimthenandthere。ButIknewnothing,andIlongedforthegoldwatch。
  AlltheconditionsIinsistedonwerethatheshouldtakemeintohisconfidenceandtellmeeverything。Iwasascuriousabouthisaffairsthenasyouareaboutminenow。Hegrantedmyconditions——why,youwillseepresently。
  This,putinshort,iswhatIheardfromhim。HedidnotwillinglytellmeallthatItellyouhere。Idrewsomeofitfromhimbypersuasionandsomeofitbyquestions。Iwasdeterminedtohaveallthetruth,andI
  believeIgotit。
  Heknewnomorethananyoneelseofwhatthestateofthingsreallywasbetweenhisfatherandmothertillafterhismother’sdeath。Thenhisfatherconfessedit,andpromisedtodowhathecouldforhisson。Hediedhavingdonenothing——nothavingevenmadeawill。Thesonwhocanblamehim?wiselyprovidedforhimself。HecametoEnglandatonce,andtookpossessionoftheproperty。Therewasnoonetosuspecthim,andnoonetosayhimnay。Hisfatherandmotherhadalwayslivedasmanandwife——noneofthefewpeoplewhowereacquaintedwiththemeversupposedthemtobeanythingelse。Therightpersontoclaimthepropertyifthetruthhadbeenknownwasadistantrelation,whohadnoideaofevergettingit,andwhowasawayatseawhenhisfatherdied。Hehadnodifficultysofar——hetookpossession,asamatterofcourse。Buthecouldnotborrowmoneyonthepropertyasamatterofcourse。Thereweretwothingswantedofhimbeforehecoulddothis。Onewasacertificateofhisbirth,andtheotherwasacertificateofhisparents’marriage。Thecertificateofhisbirthwaseasilygot——hewasbornabroad,andthecertificatewasthereindueform。Theothermatterwasadifficulty,andthatdifficultybroughthimtoOldWelmingham。
  ButforoneconsiderationhemighthavegonetoKnowlesburyinstead。
  Hismotherhadbeenlivingtherejustbeforeshemetwithhisfather——livingunderhermaidenname,thetruthbeingthatshewasreallyamarriedwoman,marriedinIreland,whereherhusbandhadill-usedher,andhadafterwardsgoneoffwithsomeotherperson。Igiveyouthisfactongoodauthority——SirFelixmentionedittohissonasthereasonwhyhehadnotmarried。Youmaywonderwhytheson,knowingthathisparentshadmeteachotheratKnowlesbury,didnotplayhisfirsttrickswiththeregisterofthatchurch,whereitmighthavebeenfairlypresumedhisfatherandmotherweremarried。ThereasonwasthattheclergymanwhodiddutyatKnowlesburychurch,intheyeareighteenhundredandthreewhen,accordingtohisbirthcertificate,hisfatherandmotheroughttohavebeenmarried,wasalivestillwhenhetookpossessionofthepropertyintheNewYearofeighteenhundredandtwenty-seven。Thisawkwardcircumstanceforcedhimtoextendhisinquiriestoourneighbourhood。Therenosuchdangerexisted,theformerclergymanatourchurchhavingbeendeadforsomeyears。
  OldWelminghamsuitedhispurposeaswellasKnowlesbury。HisfatherhadremovedhismotherfromKnowlesbury,andhadlivedwithheratacottageontheriver,alittledistancefromourvillage。Peoplewhohadknownhissolitarywayswhenhewassingledidnotwonderathissolitarywayswhenhewassupposedtobemarried。Ifhehadnotbeenahideouscreaturetolookit,hisretiredlifewiththeladymighthaveraisedsuspicions;
  but,asthingswere,hishidinghisuglinessandhisdeformityinthestrictestprivacysurprisednobody。HelivedinourneighbourhoodtillhecameinpossessionofthePark。Afterthreeorfourandtwentyyearshadpassed,whowastosaytheclergymanbeingdeadthathismarriagehadnotbeenasprivateastherestofhislife,andthatithadnottakenplaceatOldWelmimghamchurch?
  So,asItoldyou,thesonfoundourneighbourhoodthesurestplacehecouldchoosetosetthingsrightsecretlyinhisowninterests。Itmaysurpriseyoutohearthatwhathereallydidtothemarriageregisterwasdoneonthespurofthemoment——doneonsecondthoughts。
  Hisfirstnotionwasonlytoteartheleafoutintherightyearandmonth,todestroyitprivately,togobacktoLondon,andtotellthelawyerstogethimthenecessarycertificateofhisfather’smarriage,innocentlyreferringthemofcoursetothedateontheleafthatwasgone。
  Nobodycouldsayhisfatherandmotherhadnotbeenmarriedafterthat,andwhether,underthecircumstances,theywouldstretchapointornotaboutlendinghimthemoneyhethoughttheywould,hehadhisanswerreadyatallevents,ifaquestionwaseverraisedabouthisrighttothenameandtheestate。
  Butwhenhecametolookprivatelyattheregisterforhimself,hefoundatthebottomofoneofthepagesfortheyeareighteenhundredandthreeablankspaceleft,seeminglythroughtherebeingnoroomtomakealongentrythere,whichwasmadeinsteadatthetopofthenextpage。Thesightofthischancealteredallhisplans。Itwasanopportunityhehadneverhopedfor,orthoughtof——andhetookit——youknowhow。Theblankspace,tohaveexactlytalliedwithhisbirthcertificate,oughttohaveoccurredintheJulypartoftheregister。ItoccurredintheSeptemberpartinstead。
  However,inthiscase,ifsuspiciousquestionswereasked,theanswerwasnothardtofind。Hehadonlytodescribehimselfasasevenmonths’child。
  Iwasfoolenough,whenhetoldmehisstory,tofeelsomeinterestandsomepityforhim——whichwasjustwhathecalculatedon,asyouwillsee。Ithoughthimhardlyused。Itwasnothisfaultthathisfatherandmotherwerenotmarried,anditwasnothisfather’sandmother’sfaulteither。AmorescrupulouswomanthanIwas——awomanwhohadnotsetherheartonagoldwatchandchain——wouldhavefoundsomeexcusesforhim。
  Atallevents,Iheldmytongue,andhelpedtoscreenwhathewasabout。
  Hewassometimegettingtheinktherightcolourmixingitoverandoveragaininpotsandbottlesofmine,andsometimeafterwardsinpractisingthehandwriting。Buthesucceededintheend,andmadeanhonestwomanofhismotheraftershewasdeadinhergrave!Sofar,Idon’tdenythathebehavedhonourablyenoughtomyself。Hegavememywatchandchain,andsparednoexpenseinbuyingthem;bothwereofsuperiorworkmanship,andveryexpensive。Ihavegotthemstill——thewatchgoesbeautifully。
  YousaidtheotherdaythatMrsClementshadtoldyoueverythingsheknew。hithatcasethereisnoneedformetowriteaboutthetrumperyscandalbywhichIwasthesufferer——theinnocentsufferer,Ipositivelyassert。YoumustknowaswellasIdowhatthenotionwaswhichmyhusbandtookintohisheadwhenhefoundmeandmyfine-gentlemanacquaintancemeetingeachotherprivatelyandtalkingsecretstogether。Butwhatyoudon’tknowishowitendedbetweenthatsamegentlemanandmyself。Youshallreadandseehowhebehavedtome。
  ThefirstwordsIsaidtohim,whenIsawtheturnthingshadtaken,were,`Domejustice——clearmycharacterofastainonitwhichyouknowIdon’tdeserve。Idon’twantyoutomakeacleanbreastofittomyhusband——onlytellhim,onyourwordofhonourasagentleman,thatheiswrong,andthatIamnottoblameinthewayhethinksIam。Domethatjustice,atleast,afterallIhavedoneforyou。’Heflatlyrefusedinsomanywords。Hetoldmeplainlythatitwashisinteresttoletmyhusbandandallmyneighboursbelievethefalsehood——because,aslongastheydidsotheywerequitecertainnevertosuspectthetruth。Ihadaspiritofmyown,andItoldhimtheyshouldknowthetruthfrommylips。Hisreplywasshort,andtothepoint。IfIspoke,Iwasalostwoman,ascertainlyashewasalostman。
  Yes!ithadcometothat。HehaddeceivedmeabouttheriskIraninhelpinghim。Hehadpractisedonmyignorance,hehadtemptedmewithhisgifts,hehadinterestedmewithhisstory——andtheresultofitwasthathemademehisaccomplice。Heownedthiscoolly,andheendedbytellingme,forthefirsttime,whatthefrightfulpunishmentreallywasforhisoffence,andforanyonewhohelpedhimtocommitit。Inthosedaysthelawwasnotsotender-heartedasIhearitisnow。Murdererswerenottheonlypeopleliabletobehanged,andwomenconvictswerenottreatedlikeladiesinundeserveddistress。Iconfesshefrightenedme——themeanimposter!
  thecowardlyblackguard!DoyouunderstandnowhowIhatedhim?DoyouunderstandwhyIamtakingallthistrouble——thankfullytakingit——
  togratifythecuriosityofthemeritoriousyounggentlemanwhohuntedhimdown?
  Well,togoon。Hewashardlyfoolenoughtodrivemetodownrightdesperation。
  Iwasnotthesortofwomanwhomitwasquitesafetohuntintoacorner——heknewthat,andwiselyquietedmewithproposalsforthefuture。
  IdeservedsomerewardhewaskindenoughtosayfortheserviceI
  haddonehim,andsomecompensationhewassoobligingastoaddforwhatIhadsuffered。Hewasquitewilling——generousscoundrel!——tomakemeahandsomeyearlyallowance,payablequarterly,ontwoconditions。
  First,Iwastoholdmytongue——inmyowninterestsaswellasinhis。
  Secondly,IwasnottostirawayfromWelminghamwithoutfirstlettinghimknow,andwaitingtillIhadobtainedhispermission。Inmyownneighbourhood,novirtuousfemalefriendswouldtemptmeintodangerousgossipingatthetea-table。Inmyownneighbourhood,hewouldalwaysknowwheretofindme。Ahardcondition,thatsecondone——butIacceptedit。