Onemorning，ashewasreturningfromahouseattheWestEndwherehehadboughtsomeclothesfromoneoftheservants，hewasstruckbyasmallcrowdwhichhadgatheredroundaspacethathadbeenrailedoffonthegrassnearoneofthepathsintheGreenPark。
　　ItwasalovelysoftspringmorningattheendofMarch，andunusuallybalmyforthetimeofyear；evenErnest’smelancholywasrelievedforawhilebythelookofspringthatpervadedearthandsky；butitsoonreturned，andsmilingsadlyhesaidtohimself：
　　“Itmaybringhopetoothers，butformetherecanbenohopehenceforth。”
　　Asthesewordswereinhismindhejoinedthesmallcrowdwhoweregatheredroundtherailings，andsawthattheywerelookingatthreesheepwithverysmalllambsonlyadayortwoold，whichhadbeenpennedoffforshelterandprotectionfromtheothersthatrangedthepark。
　　Theywereverypretty，andLondonerssoseldomgetachanceofseeinglambsthatitwasnowondereveryonestoppedtolookatthem。Ernestobservedthatnooneseemedfonderofthemthanagreatlubberlybutcherboy，wholeanedupagainsttherailingswithatrayofmeatuponhisshoulder。Hewaslookingatthisboyandsmilingatthegrotesquenessofhisadmiration，whenhebecameawarethathewasbeingwatchedintentlybyamanincoachman’slivery，whohadalsostoppedtoadmirethelambs，andwasleaningagainsttheoppositesideoftheenclosure。ErnestknewhiminamomentasJohn，hisfather’soldcoachmanatBattersby，andwentuptohimatonce。
　　“Why，MasterErnest。”saidhe，withhisstrongnorthernaccent，“I
　　wasthinkingofyouonlythisverymorning。”andthepairshookhandsheartily。JohnwasinanexcellentplaceattheWestEnd。Hehaddoneverywell，hesaid，eversincehehadleftBattersby，exceptforthefirstyearortwo，andthat，hesaid，withascrewoftheface，hadwellnighbrokehim。
　　Ernestaskedhowthiswas。
　　“Why，yousee。”saidJohn，“IwasalwaysmainfondofthatlassEllen，whomyourememberrunningafter，MasterErnest，andgivingyourwatchto。Iexpectyouhaven’tforgottenthatday，haveyou？”
　　Andherehelaughed。“Idon’tknowasIbethefatherofthechildshecarriedawaywithherfromBattersby，butIveryeasilymayhavebeen。Anyhow，afterIhadleftyourpapa’splaceafewdaysIwrotetoEllentoanaddresswehadagreedupon，andtoldherIwoulddowhatIoughttodo，andsoIdid，forImarriedherwithinamonthafterwards。Why，Lordlovetheman，whateveristhematterwithhim？”——forashehadspokenthelastfewwordsofhisstoryErnesthadturnedwhiteasasheet，andwasleaningagainsttherailings。
　　“John。”saidmyhero，gaspingforbreath，“areyousureofwhatyousay——areyouquitesureyoureallymarriedher？”
　　“OfcourseIam。”saidJohn，“ImarriedherbeforetheregistraratLetchburyonthe15thofAugust1851。
　　“Givemeyourarm。”saidErnest，“andtakemeintoPiccadilly，andputmeintoacab，andcomewithmeatonce，ifyoucansparetime，toMrOverton’sattheTemple。”
　　IdonotthinkErnesthimselfwasmuchmorepleasedatfindingthathehadneverbeenmarriedthanIwas。Tohim，however，theshockofpleasurewaspositivelynumbinginitsintensity。Ashefelthisburdenremoved，hereeledfortheunaccustomedlightnessofhismovements；hispositionwassoshatteredthathisidentityseemedtohavebeenshatteredalso；hewasasonewakingupfromahorriblenightmaretofindhimselfsafeandsoundinbed，butwhocanhardlyevenyetbelievethattheroomisnotfullofarmedmenwhoareabouttospringuponhim。
　　“AnditisI。”hesaid，“whonotanhouragocomplainedthatIwaswithouthope。ItisI，whoforweekshavebeenrailingatfortune，andsayingthatthoughshesmiledonotherssheneversmiledatme。
　　Why，neverwasanyonehalfsofortunateasIam。”
　　“Yes。”saidI，“youhavebeeninoculatedformarriage，andhaverecovered。”
　　“Andyet。”hesaid，“Iwasveryfondofhertillshetooktodrinking。”
　　“Perhaps；butisitnotTennysonwhohassaid：’’Tisbettertohavelovedandlost，thannevertohavelostatall’？”
　　“Youareaninveteratebachelor。”wastherejoinder。
　　ThenwehadalongtalkwithJohn，towhomIgavea5poundnoteuponthespot。Hesaid，“EllenhadusedtodrinkatBattersby；thecookhadtaughther；hehadknownit，butwassofondofher，thathehadchanceditandmarriedhertosaveherfromthestreetsandinthehopeofbeingabletokeepherstraight。ShehaddonewithhimjustasshehaddonewithErnest——madehimanexcellentwifeaslongasshekeptsober，butaverybadoneafterwards。”
　　“Thereisn’t。”saidJohn，“asweeter-tempered，handier，prettiergirlthanshewasinallEngland，noroneasknowsbetterwhatamanlikes，andhowtomakehimhappy，ifyoucankeepherfromdrink；
　　butyoucan’tkeepher；she’sthatartfulshe’llgetitunderyourveryeyes，withoutyouknowingit。Ifshecan’tgetanymoreofyourthingstopawnorsell，she’llstealherneighbours’。That’showshegotintotroublefirstwhenIwaswithher。DuringthesixmonthsshewasinprisonIshouldhavefelthappyifIhadnotknownshewouldcomeoutagain。Andthenshedidcomeout，andbeforeshehadbeenfreeafortnight，shebeganshop-liftingandgoingonthelooseagain——andalltogetmoneytodrinkwith。SoseeingIcoulddonothingwithherandthatshewasjusta-killingofme，Ilefther，andcameuptoLondon，andwentintoserviceagain，andIdidnotknowwhathadbecomeofhertillyouandMrErnestheretoldme。
　　Ihopeyou’llneitherofyousayyou’veseenme。”
　　Weassuredhimwewouldkeephiscounsel，andthenheleftus，withmanyprotestationsofaffectiontowardsErnest，towhomhehadbeenalwaysmuchattached。
　　Wetalkedthesituationover，anddecidedfirsttogetthechildrenaway，andthentocometotermswithEllenconcerningtheirfuturecustody；asforherself，Iproposedthatweshouldmakeheranallowanceof，say，apoundaweektobepaidsolongasshegavenotrouble。Ernestdidnotseewherethepoundaweekwastocomefrom，soIeasedhismindbysayingIwouldpayitmyself。Beforethedaywastwohoursolderwehadgotthechildren，aboutwhomEllenhadalwaysappearedtobeindifferent，andhadconfidedthemtothecareofmylaundress，agoodmotherlysortofwoman，whotooktothemandtowhomtheytookatonce。
　　Thencametheodioustaskofgettingridoftheirunhappymother。
　　Ernest’sheartsmotehimatthenotionoftheshockthebreak-upwouldbetoher。Hewasalwaysthinkingthatpeoplehadaclaimuponhimforsomeinestimableservicetheyhadrenderedhim，orforsomeirreparablemischiefdonetothembyhimself；thecasehoweverwassoclear，thatErnest’sscruplesdidnotofferseriousresistance。
　　Ididnotseewhyheshouldhavethepainofanotherinterviewwithhiswife，soIgotMrOtterytomanagethewholebusiness。ItturnedoutthatweneednothaveharrowedourselvessomuchabouttheagonyofmindwhichEllenwouldsufferonbecominganoutcastagain。ErnestsawMrsRichards，theneighbourwhohadcalledhimdownonthenightwhenhehadfirstdiscoveredhiswife’sdrunkenness，andgotfromhersomedetailsofEllen’sopinionsuponthematter。Shedidnotseemintheleastconscience-stricken；shesaid：“Thankgoodness，atlast！”Andalthoughawarethathermarriagewasnotavalidone，evidentlyregardedthisasameredetailwhichitwouldnotbeworthanybody’swhiletogointomoreparticularly。Asregardshisbreakingwithher，shesaiditwasagoodjobbothforhimandforher。
　　“Thislife。”shecontinued，“don’tsuitme。Ernestistoogoodforme；hewantsawomanasshallbeabitbetterthanme，andIwantamanthatshallbeabitworsethanhim。Weshouldhavegotonallverywellifwehadnotlivedtogetherasmarriedfolks，butI’vebeenusedtohavealittleplaceofmyown，howeversmall，foramanyyears，andIdon’twantErnest，oranyotherman，alwayshangingaboutit。Besidesheistoosteady：hisbeinginprisonhasn’tdonehimabitofgood——he’sjustasgraveasthoseashaveneverbeeninprisonatall，andheneverswearsnorcurses，comewhatmay；itmakesmeafearedofhim，andthereforeIdrinktheworse。Whatuspoorgirlswantsisnottobejumpedupallofasuddenandmadehonestwomenof；thisistoomuchforusandthrowsusoffourperch；whatwewantsisaregularfriendortwo，who’lljustkeepusfromstarving，andforceustobegoodforabittogethernowandagain。That’saboutasmuchaswecanstand。Hemayhavethechildren；hecandobetterforthemthanIcan；andasforhismoney，hemaygiveitorkeepitashelikes，he’sneverdonemeanyharm，andIshalllethimalone；butifhemeansmetohaveit，IsupposeI’dbetterhaveit。”——Andhaveitshedid。
　　“AndI。”thoughtErnesttohimselfagainwhenthearrangementwasconcluded，“amthemanwhothoughthimselfunlucky！”
　　ImayaswellsayhereallthatneedbesaidfurtheraboutEllen。
　　ForthenextthreeyearssheusedtocallregularlyatMrOttery’severyMondaymorningforherpound。Shewasalwaysneatlydressed，andlookedsoquietandprettythatnoonewouldhavesuspectedherantecedents。Atfirstshewantedsometimestoanticipate，butafterthreeorfourineffectualattempts——oneachofwhichoccasionsshetoldamostpitifulstory——shegaveitupandtookhermoneyregularlywithoutaword。Onceshecamewithabadblackeye，“whichaboyhadthrowedastoneandhitherbymistake“；butonthewholeshelookedprettymuchthesameattheendofthethreeyearsasshehaddoneatthebeginning。Thensheexplainedthatshewasgoingtobemarriedagain。MrOtterysawheronthis，andpointedouttoherthatshewouldverylikelybeagaincommittingbigamybydoingso。“Youmaycallitwhatyoulike。”shereplied，“butIamgoingofftoAmericawithBillthebutcher’sman，andwehopeMrPontifexwon’tbetoohardonusandstoptheallowance。”Ernestwaslittlelikelytodothis，sothepairwentinpeace。IbelieveitwasBillwhohadblackedhereye，andshelikedhimallthebetterforit。
　　FromoneortwolittlethingsIhavebeenabletogatherthatthecouplegotonverywelltogether，andthatinBillshehasfoundapartnerbettersuitedtoherthaneitherJohnorErnest。OnhisbirthdayErnestgenerallyreceivesanenvelopewithanAmericanpost-markcontainingabook-markerwithaflauntingtextuponit，oramoralkettle-holder，orsomeothersimilarsmalltokenofrecognition，butnoletter。Ofthechildrenshehastakennonotice。