首页 >出版文学> The Way of All Flesh>第41章
  “Andnowletmeaskyouwhatansweryouhavemadetothisquestionhitherto?Whosefriendshiphaveyouchosen?If,knowingwhatyouknow,youhavenotyetbeguntoactaccordingtotheimmensityoftheknowledgethatisinyou,thenhewhobuildshishouseandlaysuphistreasureontheedgeofacraterofmoltenlavaisasane,sensiblepersonincomparisonwithyourselves。Isaythisasnofigureofspeechorbugbearwithwhichtofrightenyou,butasanunvarnishedunexaggeratedstatementwhichwillbenomoredisputedbyyourselvesthanbyme。”
  AndnowMrHawke,whouptothistimehadspokenwithsingularquietness,changedhismannertooneofgreaterwarmthandcontinued-
  “Oh!myyoungfriendsturn,turn,turn,nowwhileitiscalledto-
  day——nowfromthishour,fromthisinstant;staynoteventogirdupyourloins;looknotbehindyouforasecond,butflyintothebosomofthatChristwhoistobefoundofallwhoseekhim,andfromthatfearfulwrathofGodwhichliethinwaitforthosewhoknownotthethingsbelongingtotheirpeace。FortheSonofMancomethasathiefinthenight,andthereisnotoneofuscantellbutwhatthisdayhissoulmayberequiredofhim。Ifthereisevenoneherewhohasheededme。”——andhelethiseyefallforaninstantuponalmostallhishearers,butespeciallyontheErnestset——“IshallknowthatitwasnotfornothingthatIfeltthecalloftheLord,andheardasIthoughtavoicebynightthatbademecomehitherquickly,fortherewasachosenvesselwhohadneedofme。”
  HereMrHawkeendedratherabruptly;hisearnestmanner,strikingcountenanceandexcellentdeliveryhadproducedaneffectgreaterthantheactualwordsIhavegivencanconveytothereader;thevirtuelayinthemanmorethaninwhathesaid;asforthelastfewmysteriouswordsabouthishavingheardavoicebynight,theireffectwasmagical;therewasnotonewhodidnotlookdowntotheground,norwhoinhisheartdidnothalfbelievethathewasthechosenvesselonwhoseespecialbehalfGodhadsentMrHawketoCambridge。Evenifthiswerenotso,eachoneofthemfeltthathewasnowforthefirsttimeintheactualpresenceofonewhohadhadadirectcommunicationfromtheAlmighty,andtheywerethussuddenlybroughtahundredfoldnearertotheNewTestamentmiracles。
  Theywereamazed,nottosayscared,andasthoughbytacitconsenttheygatheredtogether,thankedMrHawkeforhissermon,saidgood-
  nightinahumbledeferentialmannertoBadcockandtheotherSimeonites,andlefttheroomtogether。Theyhadheardnothingbutwhattheyhadbeenhearingalltheirlives;howwasit,then,thattheyweresodumbfounderedbyit?Isupposepartlybecausetheyhadlatelybeguntothinkmoreseriously,andwereinafitstatetobeimpressed,partlyfromthegreaterdirectnesswithwhicheachfelthimselfaddressed,throughthesermonbeingdeliveredinaroom,andpartlytothelogicalconsistency,freedomfromexaggeration,andprofoundairofconvictionwithwhichMrHawkehadspoken。Hissimplicityandobviousearnestnesshadimpressedthemevenbeforehehadalludedtohisspecialmission,butthisclenchedeverything,andthewords“Lord,isitI?”wereupontheheartsofeachastheywalkedpensivelyhomethroughmoonlitcourtsandcloisters。
  IdonotknowwhatpassedamongtheSimeonitesaftertheErnestsethadleftthem,buttheywouldhavebeenmorethanmortaliftheyhadnotbeenagooddealelatedwiththeresultsoftheevening。Why,oneofErnest’sfriendswasintheUniversityeleven,andhehadactuallybeeninBadcock’sroomsandhadslunkoffonsayinggood-
  nightasmeeklyasanyofthem。Itwasnosmallthingtohavescoredasuccesslikethis。
  Ernestfeltnowthattheturningpointofhislifehadcome。HewouldgiveupallforChrist——evenhistobacco。
  Sohegatheredtogetherhispipesandpouches,andlockedthemupinhisportmanteauunderhisbedwheretheyshouldbeoutofsight,andasmuchoutofmindaspossible。Hedidnotburnthem,becausesomeonemightcomeinwhowantedtosmoke,andthoughhemightabridgehisownliberty,yet,assmokingwasnotasin,therewasnoreasonwhyheshouldbehardonotherpeople。
  AfterbreakfasthelefthisroomstocallonamannamedDawson,whohadbeenoneofMrHawke’shearersontheprecedingevening,andwhowasreadingforordinationattheforthcomingEmberWeeks,nowonlyfourmonthsdistant。Thismanhadbeenalwaysofaratherseriousturnofmind——alittletoomuchsoforErnest’staste;buttimeshadchanged,andDawson’sundoubtedsincerityseemedtorenderhimafittingcounsellorforErnestatthepresenttime。AshewasgoingthroughthefirstcourtofJohn’sonhiswaytoDawson’srooms,hemetBadcock,andgreetedhimwithsomedeference。HisadvancewasreceivedwithoneofthoseecstaticgleamswhichshoneoccasionallyuponthefaceofBadcock,andwhich,ifErnesthadknownmore,wouldhaveremindedhimofRobespierre。Asitwas,hesawitandunconsciouslyrecognisedtheunrestandself-seekingnessoftheman,butcouldnotyetformulatethem;hedislikedBadcockmorethanever,butashewasgoingtoprofitbythespiritualbenefitswhichhehadputinhisway,hewasboundtobeciviltohim,andcivilhethereforewas。
  BadcocktoldhimthatMrHawkehadreturnedtotownimmediatelyhisdiscoursewasover,butthatbeforedoingsohehadenquiredparticularlywhoErnestandtwoorthreeotherswere。IbelieveeachoneofErnest’sfriendswasgiventounderstandthathehadbeenmoreorlessparticularlyenquiredafter。Ernest’svanity——forhewashismother’sson——wastickledatthis;theideaagainpresenteditselftohimthathemightbetheoneforwhosebenefitMrHawkehadbeensent。Therewassomething,too,inBadcock’smannerwhichconveyedtheideathathecouldsaymoreifhechose,buthadbeenenjoinedtosilence。
  OnreachingDawson’srooms,hefoundhisfriendinrapturesoverthediscourseoftheprecedingevening。HardlylessdelightedwashewiththeeffectithadproducedonErnest。Hehadalwaysknown,hesaid,thatErnestwouldcomeround;hehadbeensureofit,buthehadhardlyexpectedtheconversiontobesosudden。Ernestsaidnomorehadhe,butnowthathesawhisdutysoclearlyhewouldgetordainedassoonaspossible,andtakeacuracy,eventhoughthedoingsowouldmakehimhavetogodownfromCambridgeearlier,whichwouldbeagreatgrieftohim。Dawsonapplaudedthisdetermination,anditwasarrangedthatasErnestwasstillmoreorlessofaweakbrother,Dawsonshouldtakehim,sotospeak,inspiritualtowforawhile,andstrengthenandconfirmhisfaith。
  Anoffensiveanddefensivealliancethereforewasstruckupbetweenthispairwhowereinrealitysingularlyillassorted,andErnestsettoworktomasterthebooksonwhichtheBishopwouldexaminehim。Othersgraduallyjoinedthemtilltheyformedasmallsetorchurchforthesearethesamethings,andtheeffectofMrHawke’ssermoninsteadofwearingoffinafewdays,asmighthavebeenexpected,becamemoreandmoremarked,somuchsothatitwasnecessaryforErnest’sfriendstoholdhimbackratherthanurgehimon,forheseemedlikelytodevelop——asindeedhedidforatime——
  intoareligiousenthusiast。
  Inonematteronly,didheopenlybackslide。Hehad,asIsaidabove,lockeduphispipesandtobacco,sothathemightnotbetemptedtousethem。AlldaylongonthedayafterMrHawke’ssermonheletthemlieinhisportmanteaubravely;butthiswasnotverydifficult,ashehadforsometimegivenupsmokingtillafterhall。Afterhallthisdayhedidnotsmoketillchapeltime,andthenwenttochapelinself-defence。Whenhereturnedhedeterminedtolookatthematterfromacommonsensepointofview。Onthishesawthat,providedtobaccodidnotinjurehishealth——andhereallycouldnotseethatitdid——itstoodmuchonthesamefootingasteaorcoffee。
  TobaccohadnowherebeenforbiddenintheBible,butthenithadnotyetbeendiscovered,andhadprobablyonlyescapedproscriptionforthisreason。WecanconceiveofStPaulorevenourLordHimselfasdrinkingacupoftea,butwecannotimagineeitherofthemassmokingacigaretteorachurchwarden。Ernestcouldnotdenythis,andadmittedthatPaulwouldalmostcertainlyhavecondemnedtobaccoingoodroundtermsifhehadknownofitsexistence。WasitnotthentakingratherameanadvantageoftheApostletostandonhisnothavingactuallyforbiddenit?Ontheotherhand,itwaspossiblethatGodknewPaulwouldhaveforbiddensmoking,andhadpurposelyarrangedthediscoveryoftobaccoforaperiodatwhichPaulshouldbenolongerliving。ThismightseemratherhardonPaul,consideringallhehaddoneforChristianity,butitwouldbemadeuptohiminotherways。
  ThesereflectionssatisfiedErnestthatonthewholehehadbettersmoke,sohesneakedtohisportmanteauandbroughtouthispipesandtobaccoagain。Thereshouldbemoderationhefeltinallthings,eveninvirtue;soforthatnighthesmokedimmoderately。
  Itwasapity,however,thathehadbraggedtoDawsonaboutgivingupsmoking。Thepipeshadbetterbekeptinacupboardforaweekortwo,tillinotherandeasierrespectsErnestshouldhaveprovedhissteadfastness。Thentheymightstealoutagainlittlebylittle——andsotheydid。
  Ernestnowwrotehomealettercouchedinaveindifferentfromhisordinaryones。Hisletterswereusuallyallcommonformandpadding,forasIhavealreadyexplained,ifhewroteaboutanythingthatreallyinterestedhim,hismotheralwayswantedtoknowmoreandmoreaboutit——everyfreshanswerbeingastheloppingoffofahydra’sheadandgivingbirthtohalfadozenormorenewquestions——
  butintheenditcameinvariablytothesameresult,namely,thatheoughttohavedonesomethingelse,oroughtnottogoondoingasheproposed。Now,however,therewasanewdeparture,andforthethousandthtimeheconcludedthathewasabouttotakeacourseofwhichhisfatherandmotherwouldapprove,andinwhichtheywouldbeinterested,sothatatlastheandtheymightgetonmoresympatheticallythanheretofore。Hethereforewroteagushingimpulsiveletter,whichaffordedmuchamusementtomyselfasIreadit,butwhichistoolongforreproduction。Onepassageran:“IamnowgoingtowardsChrist;thegreaternumberofmycollegefriendsare,Ifear,goingawayfromHim;wemustprayforthemthattheymayfindthepeacethatisinChristevenasIhavemyselffoundit。”Ernestcoveredhisfacewithhishandsforshameashereadthisextractfromthebundleoflettershehadputintomyhands——
  theyhadbeenreturnedtohimbyhisfatheronhismother’sdeath,hismotherhavingcarefullypreservedthem。
  “ShallIcutitout?”saidI,“Iwillifyoulike。”
  “Certainlynot。”heanswered,“andifgood-naturedfriendshavekeptmorerecordsofmyfollies,pickoutanyplumsthatmayamusethereader,andlethimhavehislaughoverthem。”Butfancywhateffectaletterlikethis——sounledupto——musthaveproducedatBattersby!EvenChristinarefrainedfromecstasyoverherson’shavingdiscoveredthepowerofChrist’sword,whileTheobaldwasfrightenedoutofhiswits。Itwaswellhissonwasnotgoingtohaveanydoubtsordifficulties,andthathewouldbeordainedwithoutmakingafussoverit,buthesmeltmischiefinthissuddenconversionofonewhohadneveryetshownanyinclinationtowardsreligion。Hehatedpeoplewhodidnotknowwheretostop。Ernestwasalwayssooutreandstrange;therewasneveranyknowingwhathewoulddonext,exceptthatitwouldbesomethingunusualandsilly。