Thebellannounceddinner。ContiofferedhisarmtoCamille;CalystegavehistoBeatrix。Camilledrewbacktoletthemarquisepass,butthelatterhadfoundamomentinwhichtolookatCalyste,andimpressuponhim,byputtingherfingeronherlips,theabsolutenecessityofdiscretion。
Contiwasextremelygayduringthedinner;perhapsthiswasonlyonewayofprobingMadamedeRochefide,whoplayedherpartextremelyill。
Ifherconducthadbeenmerecoquetry,shemighthavedeceivedevenConti;buthernewlovewasreal,anditbetrayedher。Thewilymusician,farfromaddingtoherembarrassment,pretendednottohaveperceivedit。Atdessert,hebroughttheconversationroundtowomen,andlaudedthenobilityoftheirsentiments。Manyawoman,hesaid,whomighthavebeenwillingtoabandonamaninprosperity,wouldsacrificealltohiminmisfortune。Womenhadtheadvantageovermeninconstancy;nothingeverdetachedthemfromtheirfirstlover,towhomtheyclungasamatterofhonor,unlesshewoundedthem;theyfeltthatasecondlovewasunworthyofthem,andsoforth。Hisethicswereofthehighestorder;sheddingincenseonthealtarwhereheknewthatoneheartatleast,piercedbymanyablow,wasbleeding。CamilleandBeatrixaloneunderstoodthebitternessofthesarcasmsshotforthintheguiseofeulogy。Attimestheybothflushedscarlet,buttheywereforcedtocontrolthemselves。Whendinnerwasover,theytookeachotherbythearmtoreturntoCamille’ssalon,and,asifbymutualconsent,theyturnedasideintothegreatsalon,wheretheycouldbealoneforaninstantinthedarkness。”ItisdreadfultoletContirideovermeroughshod;andyetIcan’tdefendmyself,”saidBeatrix,inalowvoice。”Thegalley-slaveisalwaysaslavetohischain-companion。Iamlost;Imustneedsreturntomygalleys!Anditisyou,Camille,whohavecastmethere!Ah!youbroughthimbackadaytoosoon,oradaytoolate。Irecognizeyourinfernaltalentasauthor。Well,yourrevengeiscomplete,thefinaleperfect!””ImayhavetoldyouthatIwouldwritetoConti,buttodoitwasanothermatter,”criedCamille。”Iamincapableofsuchbaseness。Butyouareunhappy,andIwillforgivethesuspicion。””WhatwillbecomeofCalyste?”saidthemarquise,withnaiveself-
conceit。”ThenConticarriesyouoff,doeshe?”askedCamille。”Ah!youthinkyoutriumph!”criedBeatrix。
AngerdistortedherhandsomefaceasshesaidthosebitterwordstoCamille,whowastryingtohidehersatisfactionunderafalseexpressionofsympathy。Unfortunately,thesparkleinhereyesbeliedthesadnessofherface,andBeatrixwaslearnedinsuchdeceptions。
When,afewmomentslater,thetwowomenwereseatedunderastronglightonthatdivanwherethefirstthreeweekssomanycomedieshadbeenplayed,andwherethesecrettragedyofmanythwartedpassionshadbegun,theyexaminedeachotherforthelasttime,andfelttheywereforeverpartedbyanundyinghatred。”Calysteremainstoyou,”saidBeatrix,lookingintoCamille’seyes;”butIamfixedinhisheart,andnowomancaneverdrivemeoutofit。”
Camillereplied,withaninimitabletoneofironythatstruckthemarquisetotheheart,inthefamouswordsofMazarin’sniecetoLouisXIV。,——”Youreign,youlove,andyoudepart!”
NeitherCamillenorBeatrixwasconsciousduringthissharpandbittersceneoftheabsenceofContiandCalyste。Thecomposerhadremainedattablewithhisrival,begginghimtokeephimcompanyinfinishingabottleofchampagne。”Wehavesomethingtosaytoeachother,”addedConti,topreventallrefusalonthepartofCalyste。
Placedastheybothwere,itwasimpossiblefortheyoungBretontorefusethischallenge。”Mydearfriend,”saidthecomposer,inhismostcaressingvoice,assoonasthepoorladhaddrunkacoupleofglassesofchampagne,”wearebothgoodfellows,andwecanspeaktoeachotherfrankly。Ihavenotcomeheresuspiciously。Beatrixlovesme,”——thiswithagestureoftheutmostself-conceit——”butthetruthis,Ihaveceasedtoloveher。
Iamnotheretocarryherawaywithme,buttobreakoffourrelations,andtoleaveherthehonorsoftherupture。Youareyoung;
youdon’tyetknowhowusefulitistoappeartobethevictimwhenyouarereallytheexecutioner。Youngmenspitfireandflame;theyleaveawomanwithnoiseandfury;theyoftendespiseher,andtheymakeherhatethem。ButwisemendoasIamdoing;theygetthemselvesdismissed,assumingamortifiedair,whichleavesregretinthewoman’sheartandalsoasenseofhersuperiority。Youdon’tyetknow,luckilyforyou,howhamperedmenoftenareintheircareersbytherashpromiseswhichwomenaresillyenoughtoacceptwhengallantryobligesustomakenoosestocatchourhappiness。Wesweareternalfaithfulness,anddeclarethatwedesiretopassourliveswiththem,andseemtoawaitahusband’sdeathimpatiently。Lethimdie,andtherearesomeprovincialwomenobtuseorsillyormaliciousenoughtosay:’HereamI,freeatlast。’Thespentballsuddenlycomestolifeagain,andfallsplumbinthemidstofourfinesttriumphsorourmostcarefullyplannedhappiness。IhaveseenthatyouloveBeatrix。I
leaveherthereforeinapositionwhereshelosesnothingofherpreciousmajesty;shewillcertainlycoquetwithyou,ifonlytoteaseandannoythatangelofaCamilleMaupin。Well,mydearfellow,takeher,loveher,you’lldomeagreatservice;Iwanthertoturnagainstme。Ihavebeenafraidofherprideandhervirtue。Perhaps,inspiteofmyapprovalofthematter,itmaytakesometimetoeffectthis/chassez-croissez/。Onsuchoccasionsthewisestplanistotakenostepatall。Idid,justnow,aswewalkedaboutthelawn,attempttoletherseethatIknewall,andwasreadytocongratulateheronhernewhappiness。Well,shewasfurious!AtthismomentIamdesperatelyinlovewiththeyoungestandhandsomestofourprima-
donnas,MademoiselleFalconoftheGrandOpera。Ithinkofmarryingher;yes,Ihavegotasfarasthat。WhenyoucometoParisyouwillseethatIhavechangedamarquiseforaqueen。”
Calyste,whosecandidfacerevealedhissatisfaction,admittedhisloveforBeatrix,whichwasallthatContiwantedtodiscover。Thereisnomanintheworld,however/blase/ordepravedhemaybe,whoselovewillnotflameupagainthemomentheseesitthreatenedbyarival。Hemaywishtoleaveawoman,buthewillneverwillinglyletherleavehim。Whenapairofloversgettothisextremity,boththemanandthewomanstriveforpriorityofaction,sodeepisthewoundtotheirvanity。Questionedbythecomposer,CalysterelatedallthathadhappenedduringthelastthreeweeksatLesTouches,delightedtofindthatConti,whoconcealedhisfuryunderanappearanceofcharminggood-humor,tookitallingoodpart。”Come,letusgoupstairs,”saidthelatter。”Womenaresodistrustful;thosetwowillwonderhowwecansitheretogetherwithouttearingeachother’shairout;theyareevencapableofcomingdowntolisten。I’llserveyoufaithfully,mydearboy。You’llseemeroughandjealouswiththemarquise;Ishallseemtosuspecther;
there’snobetterwaytodriveawomantobetrayyou。Youwillbehappy,andIshallbefree。Seemtopitythatangelforbelongingtoamanwithoutdelicacy;showheratear——foryoucanweep,youarestillyoung。I,alas!canweepnomore;andthat’sagreatadvantagelost。”
CalysteandContiwentuptoCamille’ssalon。Thecomposer,beggedbyhisyoungrivaltosing,gavethemthatgreatestofmusicalmasterpiecesviewedasexecution,thefamous”/Priachespuntil’aurora/,”whichRubinihimselfneverattemptedwithouttrembling,andwhichhadoftenbeenConti’striumph。Neverwashissingingmoreextraordinarythanonthisoccasion,whensomanyfeelingswerecontendinginhisbreast。Calystewasinecstasy。AsContisangthefirstwordsofthecavatina,helookedintentlyatthemarquise,givingtothosewordsacruelsignificationwhichwasfullyunderstood。Camille,whoaccompaniedhim,guessedtheorderthusconveyed,whichbowedtheheadofthelucklessBeatrix。ShelookedatCalyste,andfeltsurethattheyouthhadfallenintosometrapinspiteofheradvice。ThisconvictionbecamecertaintywhentheevidentlyhappyBretoncameuptobidBeatrixgood-night,kissingherhand,andpressingitwithalittleairofhappyconfidence。
BythetimeCalystehadreachedGuerande,theservantswerepackingConti’stravelling-carriage,and”bydawn,”asthesonghadsaid,thecomposerwascarryingBeatrixawaywithCamille’shorsestothefirstrelay。ThemorningtwilightenabledMadamedeRochefidetoseeGuerande,itstowers,whitenedbythedawn,shiningoutuponthestilldarksky。Melancholythoughtspossessedher;shewasleavingthereoneofthesweetestflowersofallherlife,——apurelove,suchasayounggirldreamsof;theonlytrueloveshehadeverknownorwasevertoconceiveof。Thewomanoftheworldobeyedthelawsoftheworld;shesacrificedlovetotheirdemandsjustasmanywomensacrificeittoreligionortoduty。Sometimesmerepridecanriseinactsashighasvirtue。Readthus,thishistoryisthatofmanywomen。
ThenextmorningCalystewenttoLesTouchesaboutmid-day。Whenhereachedthespotfromwhich,thedaybefore,hehadseenBeatrixwatchingforhimatthewindow,hesawCamille,whoinstantlyrandowntohim。Shemethimatthefootofthestaircaseandtoldthecrueltruthinoneword,——”Gone!””Beatrix?”askedCalyste,thunderstruck。”YouhavebeendupedbyConti;youtoldmenothing,andIcoulddonothingforyou。”
Sheledthepoorfellowtoherlittlesalon,whereheflunghimselfonthedivanwherehehadsooftenseenthemarquise,andburstintotears。Felicitesmokedherhookahandsaidnothing,knowingwellthatnowordsorthoughtsarecapableofarrestingthefirstanguishofsuchpain,whichisalwaysdeafanddumb。Calyste,unableeventothink,muchlesstochooseacourse,sattherealldayinastateofcompletetorpidity。Justbeforedinnerwasserved,Camilletriedtosayafewwords,afterbegginghim,veryearnestly,tolistentoher。”Friend,”shesaid,”youcausedmethebitterestsuffering,andIhadnot,likeyou,abeautifulyounglifebeforemeinwhichtohealmyself。Forme,lifehasnolongeranyspring,normysoulalove。So,tofindconsolation,Ihavehadtolookabove。Here,inthisroom,thedaybeforeBeatrixcamehere,Idrewyouherportrait;Ididnotdoherinjustice,oryoumighthavethoughtmejealous。Iwantedyoutoknowherassheis,forthatwouldhavekeptyousafe。Listennowtothefulltruth。MadamedeRochefideiswhollyunworthyofyou。Thescandalofherfallwasnotnecessary;shedidthethingdeliberatelyinordertoplayapartintheeyesofsociety。Sheisoneofthosewomenwhopreferthecelebrityofascandaltotranquilhappiness;
theyflyinthefaceofsocietytoobtainthefatalalmsofarebuke;
theydesiretobetalkedaboutatanycost。Beatrixwaseatenupwithvanity。Herfortuneandherwithadnotgivenherthefeminineroyaltythatshecraved;theyhadnotenabledhertoreignsupremeoverasalon。ShethenbethoughtherselfofseekingthecelebrityoftheDuchessedeLangeaisandtheVicomtessedeBeauseant。Buttheworld,afterall,isjust;itgivesthehomageofitsinteresttorealfeelingsonly。Beatrixplayingcomedywasjudgedtobeasecond-rateactress。Therewasnoreasonwhateverforherflight;theswordofDamocleswasnotsuspendedoverherhead;sheisneithersincere,norloving,nortender;ifshewere,wouldshehavegoneawaywithContithismorning?”
Camilletalkedlongandeloquently;butthislastefforttoopenCalyste’seyeswasuseless,andshesaidnomorewhenheexpressedtoherbyagesturehisabsolutebeliefinBeatrix。
Sheforcedhimtocomedownintothedining-roomandsittherewhileshedined;thoughhehimselfwasunabletoswallowfood。Itisonlyduringextremeyouththatthesecontractionsofthebodilyfunctionsoccur。Later,theorganshaveacquired,asitwere,fixedhabits,andarehardened。Thereactionofthementalandmoralsystemuponthephysicalisnotenoughtoproduceamortalillnessunlessthephysicalsystemretainsitsprimitivepurity。Amanresiststheviolentgriefthatkillsayouth,lessbythegreaterweaknessofhisaffectionthanbythegreaterstrengthofhisorgans。
ThereforeMademoiselledesToucheswasgreatlyalarmedbythecalm,resignedattitudewhichCalystetookafterhisburstoftearshadsubsided。Beforehelefther,heaskedpermissiontogointoBeatrix’sbedroom,wherehehadseenheronthenightofherillness,andtherehelaidhisheadonthepillowwherehershadlain。”Iamcommittingfollies,”hesaid,graspingCamille’shand,andbiddinghergood-nightindeepdejection。
Hereturnedhome,foundtheusualcompanyat/mouche/,andpassedtheremainderoftheeveningsittingbesidehismother。Therector,theChevalierduHalga,andMademoiselledePen-HoelallknewofMadamedeRochefide’sdeparture,andwererejoicinginit。Calystewouldnowreturntothem;andallthreewatchedhimcautiously。Nooneinthatoldmanor-housewascapableofimaginingtheresultofafirstlove,theloveofyouthinaheartsosimpleandsotrueasthatofCalyste。
XVI
SICKNESSUNTODEATH
ForseveraldaysCalystewentregularlytoLesTouches。Hepacedroundandroundthelawn,wherehehadsometimeswalkedwithBeatrixonhisarm。HeoftenwenttoCroisictostanduponthatfatefulrock,orlieforhoursinthebushofbox;for,bystudyingthefootholdsonthesidesofthefissure,hehadfoundameansofgettingupanddown。
Thesesolitarytrips,hissilence,hisgravity,madehismotherveryanxious。Afterabouttwoweeks,duringwhichtimethisconduct,likethatofacagedanimal,lasted,thispoorlover,cagedinhisdespair,ceasedtocrossthebay;hehadscarcelystrengthtodraghimselfalongtheroadfromGuerandetothespotwherehehadseenBeatrixwatchingfromherwindow。Thefamily,delightedatthedepartureof”thoseParisians,”touseatermoftheprovinces,sawnothingfatalordiseasedaboutthelad。Thetwooldmaidsandtherector,pursuingtheirscheme,hadkeptCharlottedeKergarouet,whonightlyplayedoffherlittlecoquetriesonCalyste,obtaininginreturnnothingbetterthanadviceinplaying/mouche/。Duringtheselongevenings,CalystesatbetweenhismotherandthelittleBretongirl,observedbytherectorandCharlotte’saunt,whodiscussedhisgreaterorlessdepressionastheywalkedhometogether。Theirsimplemindsmistookthelethargicindifferenceofthehaplessyouthforsubmissiontotheirplans。OneeveningwhenCalyste,weariedout,wentoffsuddenlytobed,theplayersdroppedtheircardsuponthetableandlookedateachotherastheyoungmanclosedthedoorofhischamber。Oneandallhadlistenedtothesoundofhisrecedingstepswithanxiety。”SomethingisthematterwithCalyste,”saidthebaroness,wipinghereyes。”Nothingisthematter,”repliedMademoiselledePen-Hoel;”butyoushouldmarryhimatonce。””Doyoubelievethatmarriagewoulddiverthismind?”askedthechevalier。
CharlottelookedreprovinglyatMonsieurduHalga,whomshenowbegantothinkill-mannered,depraved,immoral,withoutreligion,andveryridiculousabouthisdog,——opinionswhichheraunt,defendingtheoldsailor,combated。”IshalllectureCalysteto-morrowmorning,”saidthebaron,whomtheothershadthoughtasleep。”Idonotwishtogooutofthisworldwithoutseeingmygrandson,alittlepinkandwhiteGuenicwithaBretoncaponhishead。””Calystedoesn’tsayaword,”saidoldZephirine,”andthere’snomakingoutwhat’sthematterwithhim。Hedoesn’teat;Idon’tseewhatheliveson。IfhegetshismealsatLesTouches,thedevil’skitchendoesn’tnourishhim。””Heisinlove,”saidthechevalier,riskingthatopinionverytimidly。”Come,come,oldgray-beard,you’veforgottentoputinyourstake!”
criedMademoiselledePen-Hoel。”Whenyoubegintothinkofyouryoungdaysyouforgeteverything。””Cometobreakfastto-morrow,”saidoldZephirinetoherfriendJacqueline;”mybrotherwillhavehadatalkwithhisson,andwecansettlethematterfinally。Onenail,youknow,drivesoutanother。””NotamongBretons,”saidthechevalier。
ThenextdayCalystesawCharlotte,asshearriveddressedwithunusualcare,justafterthebaronhadgivenhim,inthedining-room,adiscourseonmatrimony,towhichhecouldmakenoanswer。Henowknewtheignoranceofhisfatherandmotherandalltheirfriends;hehadgatheredthefruitsofthetreeofknowledge,andknewhimselftobeasmuchisolatedasifhedidnotspeakthefamilylanguage。Hemerelyrequestedhisfathertogivehimafewdays’grace。Theoldbaronrubbedhishandswithjoy,andgavefreshlifetothebaronessbywhisperinginherearwhathecalledthegoodnews。
Breakfastwasgay;Charlotte,towhomthebaronhadgivenahint,wassparkling。Afterthemealwasover,Calystewentoutupontheporticoleadingtothegarden,followedbyCharlotte;hegaveherhisarmandledhertothegrotto。Theirparentsandfriendswereatthewindow,lookingatthemwithaspeciesoftenderness。PresentlyCharlotte,uneasyathersuitor’ssilence,lookedbackandsawthem,whichgaveheranopportunityofbeginningtheconversationbysayingtoCalyste,——”Theyarewatchingus。””Theycannothearus,”hereplied。”True;buttheyseeus。””Letussitdown,Charlotte,”repliedCalyste,gentlytakingherhand。”Isittruethatyourbannerusedformerlytofloatfromthattwistedcolumn?”askedCharlotte,withasensethatthehousewasalreadyhers;howcomfortablesheshouldbethere!whatahappysortoflife!”Youwillmakesomechangesinsidethehouse,won’tyou,Calyste?”shesaid。”Ishallnothavetime,mydearCharlotte,”saidtheyoungman,takingherhandsandkissingthem。”Iamgoingnowtotellyoumysecret。I
lovetoowellapersonwhomyouhaveseen,andwholovesme,tobeabletomakethehappinessofanyotherwoman;thoughIknowthatfromourchildhoodyouandIhavebeendestinedforeachotherbyourfriends。””Butsheismarried,Calyste。””Ishallwait,”repliedtheyoungman。”AndI,too,”saidCharlotte,hereyesfillingwithtears。”Youcannotlongloveawomanlikethat,who,theysay,hasgoneoffwithasinger——””Marry,mydearCharlotte,”saidCalyste,interruptingher。”Withthefortuneyourauntintendstogiveyou,whichisenormousforBrittany,youcanchoosesomebettermanthanI。Youcouldmarryatitledman。I
havebroughtyouhere,nottotellyouwhatyoualreadyknew,buttoentreatyou,inthenameofourchildishfriendship,totakethisruptureuponyourself,andsaythatyouhaverejectedme。Saythatyoudonotwishtomarryamanwhoseheartisnotfree;andthusIshallbesparedatleastthesensethatIhavedoneyoupublicwrong。Youdonotknow,Charlotte,howheavyaburdenlifenowistome。Icannotbeartheslighteststruggle;Iamweakenedlikeamanwhosevitalsparkisgone,whosesoulhaslefthim。IfitwerenotforthegriefI
shouldcausemymother,Iwouldhaveflungmyselfbeforenowintothesea;IhavenotreturnedtotherocksatCroisicsincethedaythattemptationbecamealmostirresistible。Donotspeakofthistoanyone。Good-bye,Charlotte。”
Hetooktheyounggirl’sheadandkissedherhair;thenheleftthegardenbythepostern-gateandfledtoLesTouches,wherehestayednearCamilletillpastmidnight。Onreturninghome,atoneinthemorning,hefoundhismotherawaitinghimwithherworsted-work。Heenteredsoftly,claspedherhandinhis,andsaid,——”IsCharlottegone?””Shegoesto-morrow,withheraunt,indespair,bothofthem,”
answeredthebaroness。”CometoIrelandwithme,myCalyste。””ManyatimeIhavethoughtofflyingthere——””Ah!”criedthebaroness。”WithBeatrix,”headded。
SomedaysafterCharlotte’sdeparture,CalystejoinedtheChevalierduHalgainhisdailypromenadeonthemallwithhislittledog。Theysatdowninthesunshineonabench,wheretheyoungman’seyescouldwanderfromthevanesofLesTouchestotherocksofCroisic,againstwhichthewaveswereplayinganddashingtheirwhitefoam。Calystewasthinandpale;hisstrengthwasdiminishing,andhewasconsciousattimesoflittleshuddersatregularintervals,denotingfever。Hiseyes,surroundedbydarkcircles,hadthatsingularbrilliancywhichafixedideagivestotheeyesofhermitsandsolitarysouls,ortheardorofcontesttothoseofthestrongfightersofourpresentcivilization。Thechevalierwastheonlypersonwithwhomhecouldexchangeafewideas。Hehaddivinedinthatoldmananapostleofhisownreligion;herecognizedinhissoulthevestigesofaneternallove。”Haveyoulovedmanywomeninyourlife?”heaskedhimonthesecondoccasion,when,asseamensay,theysailedincompanyalongthemall。”Onlyone,”repliedDuHalga。”Wasshefree?””No,”exclaimedthechevalier。”Ah!howIsuffered!Shewasthewifeofmybestfriend,myprotector,mychief——butwelovedeachotherso!””Didsheloveyou?”saidCalyste。”Passionately,”repliedthechevalier,withafervencynotusualwithhim。”Youwerehappy?””Untilherdeath;shediedattheageofforty-nine,duringtheemigration,atSt。Petersburg,theclimateofwhichkilledher。Shemustbeverycoldinhercoffin。Ihaveoftenthoughtofgoingtheretofetchher,andlayherinourdearBrittany,neartome!Butsheliesinmyheart。”
Thechevalierbrushedawayhistears。Calystetookhishandandpressedit。”Icareforthislittledogmorethanforlifeitself,”saidtheoldman,pointingtoThisbe。”Thelittledarlingispreciselyliketheonesheheldonherkneesandstrokedwithherbeautifulhands。IneverlookatThisbebutwhatIseethehandsofMadamel’Amirale。””DidyouseeMadamedeRochefide?”askedCalyste。”No,”repliedthechevalier。”Itissixty-eightyearssinceIhavelookedatanywomanwithattention——exceptyourmother,whohassomethingofMadamel’Amirale’scomplexion。”
Threedayslater,thechevaliersaidtoCalyste,onthemall,——”Mychild,Ihaveahundredandforty/louis/laidby。WhenyouknowwhereMadamedeRochefideis,comeandgetthemandfollowher。”
Calystethankedtheoldman,whoseexistenceheenvied。Butnow,fromdaytoday,hegrewmorose;heseemedtolovenoone;allthingshurthim;hewasgentleandkindtohismotheronly。Thebaronesswatchedwitheverincreasinganxietytheprogressofhismadness;shealonewasable,byforceofprayerandentreaty,tomakehimswallowfood。
TowardtheendofOctoberthesickladceasedtogoeventothemallinsearchofthechevalier,whonowcamevainlytothehousetotempthimoutwiththecoaxingwisdomofanoldman。”WecantalkofMadamedeRochefide,”hewouldsay。”I’lltellyoumyfirstadventure。””Yoursonisill,”hesaidprivatelytothebaroness,onthedayhebecameconvincedthatallsucheffortswereuseless。
Calysterepliedtoquestionsabouthishealththathewasperfectlywell;butlikeallyoungvictimsofmelancholy,hetookpleasureinthethoughtofdeath。Henolongerleftthehouse,butsatinthegardenonabench,warminghimselfinthepaleandtepidsunshine,alonewithhisonethought,andavoidingallcompanionship。
SoonafterthedaywhenCalysteceasedtogoeventoLesTouches,FeliciterequestedtherectorofGuerandetocomeandseeher。TheassiduitywithwhichtheAbbeGrimontcalledeverymorningatLesTouches,andsometimesdinedthere,becamethegreattopicofthetown;itwastalkedofallovertheregion,andevenreachedNantes。
Nevertheless,therectornevermissedasingleeveningatthehotelduGuenic,wheredesolationreigned。MastersandservantswereallafflictedatCalyste’sincreasingweakness,thoughnoneofthemthoughthimindanger;howcoulditeverenterthemindsofthesegoodpeoplethatyouthmightdieoflove?Eventhechevalierhadnoexampleofsuchadeathamonghismemoriesoflifeandtravel。TheyattributedCalyste’sthinnesstowantoffood。Hismotherimploredhimtoeat。
Calysteendeavoredtoconquerhisrepugnanceinordertocomforther;
butnourishmenttakenagainsthiswillservedonlytoincreasetheslowfeverwhichwasnowconsumingthebeautifulyounglife。
DuringthelastdaysofOctoberthecherishedchildofthehousecouldnolongermountthestairstohischamber,andhisbedwasplacedinthelowerhall,wherehewassurroundedatallhoursbyhisfamily。
TheysentatlastfortheGuerandephysician,whobrokethefeverwithquinineandreduceditinafewdays,orderingCalystetotakeexercise,andfindsomethingtoamusehim。Thebaron,onthis,cameoutofhisapathyandrecoveredalittleofhisoldstrength;hegrewyoungerashissonseemedtoage。WithCalyste,Gasselin,andhistwofinedogs,hestartedfortheforest,andforsomedaysallthreehunted。Calysteobeyedhisfatherandwentwherehewastold,fromforesttoforest,visitingfriendsandacquaintancesintheneighboringchateaus。Buttheyouthhadnospiritorgaiety;nothingbroughtasmiletohisface;hislividandcontractedfeaturesbetrayedanutterlypassivebeing。Thebaron,wornoutatlastbyfatigueconsequentonthisspasmofexertion,wasforcedtoreturnhome,bringingCalysteinastateofexhaustionalmostequaltohisown。Forseveraldaysaftertheirreturnbothfatherandsonweresodangerouslyillthatthefamilywereforcedtosend,attherequestoftheGuerandephysicianhimself,fortwoofthebestdoctorsinNantes。
ThebaronhadreceivedafatalshockonrealizingthechangenowsovisibleinCalyste。Withthatlucidityofmindwhichnaturegivestothedying,hetrembledatthethoughtthathisracewasabouttoperish。Hesaidnoword,butheclaspedhishandsandprayedtoGodashesatinhischair,fromwhichhisweaknessnowpreventedhimfromrising。Thefather’sfacewasturnedtowardthebedwherethesonlay,andhelookedathimalmostincessantly。AttheleastmotionCalystemade,asingularcommotionstirredwithinhim,asiftheflameofhisownlifewereflickering。ThebaronessnolongerlefttheroomwhereZephirinesatknittinginthechimney-cornerinhorribleuneasiness。
Demandsweremadeupontheoldwomanforwood,fatherandsonbothsufferingfromthecold,andforsuppliesandprovisions,sothat,finally,notbeingagileenoughtosupplythesewants,shehadgivenherpreciouskeystoMariotte。Butsheinsistedonknowingeverything;
shequestionedMariotteandhersister-in-lawincessantly,askinginalowvoicetobetold,overandoveragain,thestateofherbrotherandnephew。Onenight,whenfatherandsonweredozing,MademoiselledePen-Hoeltoldherthatshemustresignherselftothedeathofherbrother,whosepallidfacewasnowthecolorofwax。Theoldwomandroppedherknitting,fumbledinherpocketforawhile,andatlengthdrewoutanoldchapletofblackwood,onwhichshebegantopraywithafervorwhichgavetoheroldandwitheredfaceasplendorsovigorousthattheotheroldwomanimitatedherfriend,andthenallpresent,onasignfromtherector,joininginthespiritualupliftingofMademoiselledeGuenic。”Alas!IprayedtoGod,”saidthebaroness,rememberingherprayerafterreadingthefatalletterwrittenbyCalyste,”andhedidnothearme。””Perhapsitwouldbewell,”saidtherector,”ifwebeggedMademoiselledesTouchestocomeandseeCalyste。””She!”criedoldZephirine,”theauthorofallourmisery!shewhohasturnedhimfromhisfamily,whohastakenhimfromus,ledhimtoreadimpiousbooks,taughthimanhereticallanguage!Letherbeaccursed,andmayGodneverpardonher!ShehasdestroyedtheduGuenics!””Shemayperhapsrestorethem,”saidtherector,inagentlevoice。”MademoiselledesTouchesisasaintlywoman;Iamhersuretyforthat。ShehasnonebutgoodintentionstoCalyste。Maysheonlybeenabledtocarrythemout。””Letmeknowthedaywhenshesetsfootinthishouse,thatImaygetoutofit,”criedtheoldwomanpassionately。”Shehaskilledbothfatherandson。DoyouthinkIdon’theardeathinCalyste’svoice?heissofeeblenowthathehasbarelystrengthtowhisper。”
Itwasatthismomentthatthethreedoctorsarrived。TheypliedCalystewithquestions;butasforhisfather,theexaminationwasshort;theyweresurprisedthathestilllivedon。TheGuerandedoctorcalmlytoldthebaronessthatastoCalyste,itwouldprobablybebesttotakehimtoParisandconsultthemostexperiencedphysicians,foritwouldcostoverahundred/louis/tobringonedown。”Peopledieofsomething,butnotoflove,”saidMademoiselledePen-
Hoel。”Alas!whateverbethecause,Calysteisdying,”saidthebaroness。”I
seeallthesymptomsofconsumption,thatmosthorriblediseaseofmycountry,abouthim。””Calystedying!”saidthebaron,openinghiseyes,fromwhichrolledtwolargetearswhichslowlymadetheirway,delayedbywrinkles,alonghischeeks,——theonlytearshehadprobablyevershedinhislife。Suddenlyherosetohisfeet,walkedthefewstepstohisson’sbedside,tookhishand,andlookedearnestlyathim。”Whatisityouwant,father?”saidCalyste。”Thatyoushouldlive!”criedthebaron。”IcannotlivewithoutBeatrix,”repliedCalyste。
Theoldmandroppedintoachair。”Oh!wherecouldwegetahundred/louis/tobringdoctorsfromParis?
Thereisstilltime,”criedthebaroness。”Ahundred/louis!/”criedZephirine;”willthatsavehim?”
Withoutwaitingforhersister-in-law’sreply,theoldmaidranherhandsthroughtheplacket-holesofhergown,unfastenedthepetticoatbeneathit,whichgaveforthaheavysoundasitdroppedtothefloor。
Sheknewsowelltheplaceswhereshehadsewninher/louis/thatshenowrippedthemoutwiththerapidityofmagic。Thegoldpiecesrangastheyfell,onebyone,intoherlap。TheoldPen-Hoelgazedatthisperformanceinstupefiedamazement。”Butthey’llseeyou!”shewhisperedinherfriend’sear。”Thirty-seven,”answeredZephirine,continuingtocount。”Everyonewillknowhowmuchyouhave。””Forty-two。””Double/louis!/allnew!Howdidyougetthem,youwhocan’tseeclearly?””Ifeltthem。Here’sonehundredandfour/louis/,”criedZephirine。”Isthatenough?””Whatisallthis?”askedtheChevalierduHalga,whonowcamein,unabletounderstandtheattitudeofhisoldblindfriend,holdingoutherpetticoatwhichwasfullofgoldcoins。
MademoiselledePen-Hoelexplained。”Iknewit,”saidthechevalier,”andIhavecometobringahundredandforty/louis/whichIhavebeenholdingatCalyste’sdisposition,asheknowsverywell。”
Thechevalierdrewthe/rouleaux/fromhispocketandshowedthem。
Mariotte,seeingsuchwealth,sentGasselintolockthedoors。”Goldwillnotgivehimhealth,”saidthebaroness,weeping。”ButitcantakehimtoParis,wherehecanfindher。Come,Calyste。””Yes,”criedCalyste,springingup,”Iwillgo。””Hewilllive,”saidthebaron,inashakingvoice;”andIcandie——
sendfortherector!”
Thewordscastterroronallpresent。Calyste,seeingthemortalpalenessonhisfather’sface,fortheoldmanwasexhaustedbythecruelemotionsofthescene,cametohisfather’sside。Therector,afterhearingthereportofthedoctors,hadgonetoMademoiselledesTouches,intendingtobringherbackwithhimtoCalyste,forinproportionastheworthymanhadformerlydetestedher,henowadmiredher,andprotectedherasashepherdprotectsthemostpreciousofhisflock。
Whenthenewsofthebaron’sapproachingendbecameknowninGuerande,acrowdgatheredinthestreetandlane;thepeasants,the/paludiers/,andtheservantskneltinthecourt-yardwhiletherectoradministeredthelastsacramentstotheoldBretonwarrior。Thewholetownwasagitatedbythenewsthatthefatherwasdyingbesidehishalf-dyingson。TheprobableextinctionofthisoldBretonracewasfelttobeapubliccalamity。
ThesolemnceremonyaffectedCalystedeeply。Hisfilialsorrowsilencedforamomenttheanguishofhislove。Duringthelasthourofthegloriousolddefenderofthemonarchy,hekneltbesidehim,watchingthecomingonofdeath。Theoldmandiedinhischairinpresenceoftheassembledfamily。”IdiefaithfultoGodandhisreligion,”hesaid。”MyGod!astherewardofmyeffortsgrantthatCalystemaylive!””Ishalllive,father;andIwillobeyyou,”saidtheyoungman。”IfyouwishtomakemydeathashappyasFannyhasmademylife,sweartometomarry。””Ipromiseit,father。”
ItwasatouchingsighttoseeCalyste,orratherhisshadow,leaningonthearmoftheoldChevalierduHalga——aspectreleadingashade——
andfollowingthebaron’scoffinaschiefmourner。Thechurchandthelittlesquarewerecrowdedwiththecountrypeoplecomingintothefuneralfromacircuitofthirtymiles。
ButthebaronessandZephirinesoonsawthat,inspiteofhisintentiontoobeyhisfather’swishes,Calystewasfallingbackintoaconditionoffatalstupor。Onthedaywhenthefamilyputontheirmourning,thebaronesstookhersontoabenchinthegardenandquestionedhimclosely。Calysteansweredgentlyandsubmissively,buthisanswersonlyprovedtoherthedespairofhissoul。”Mother,”hesaid,”thereisnolifeinme。WhatIeatdoesnotfeedme;theairthatentersmylungsdoesnotrefreshme;thesunfeelscold;itseemstoyoutolightthatfrontofthehouse,andshowyoutheoldcarvingsbathedinitsbeams,buttomeitisallablur,amist。IfBeatrixwerehere,itwouldbedazzling。Thereisbutoneonlythingleftinthisworldthatkeepsitsshapeandcolortomyeyes,——thisflower,thisfoliage,”headded,drawingfromhisbreastthewitheredbunchthemarquisehadgivenhimatCroisic。
Thebaronessdarednotsaymore。Herson’sanswerseemedtohermoreindicativeofmadnessthanhissilenceofgrief。Shesawnohope,nolightinthedarknessthatsurroundedthem。
Thebaron’slasthoursanddeathhadpreventedtherectorfrombringingMademoiselledesTouchestoCalyste,asheseemedbentondoing,forreasonswhichhedidnotreveal。Butonthisday,whilemotherandsonstillsatonthegardenbench,CalystequiveredalloveronperceivingFelicitethroughtheoppositewindowsofthecourt-
yardandgarden。SheremindedhimofBeatrix,andhisliferevived。ItwasthereforetoCamillethatthepoorstrickenmotherowedthefirstmotionofjoythatlightenedhermourning。”Well,Calyste,”saidMademoiselledesTouches,whentheymet,”IwantyoutogotoPariswithme。WewillfindBeatrix,”sheaddedinalowvoice。
Thepale,thinfaceoftheyouthflushedred,andasmilebrightenedhisfeatures。”Letusgo,”hesaid。”Weshallsavehim,”saidMademoiselledesTouchestothemother,whopressedherhandsandweptforjoy。
Aweekafterthebaron’sfuneral,MademoiselledesTouches,theBaronneduGuenicandCalystestartedforParis,leavingthehouseholdinchargeofoldZephirine。
XVII
ADEATH:AMARRIAGE
Felicite’stenderlovewaspreparingforCalysteaprosperousfuture。
BeingalliedtothefamilyofGrandlieu,theducalbranchofwhichwasendinginfivedaughtersforlackofamaleheir,shehadwrittentotheDuchessedeGrandlieu,describingCalysteandgivinghishistory,andalsostatingcertainintentionsofherown,whichwereasfollows:
ShehadlatelysoldherhouseintherueduMont-Blanc,forwhichapartyofspeculatorshadgivenhertwomillionsfivehundredthousandfrancs。HermanofbusinesshadsincepurchasedforheracharmingnewhouseintheruedeBourbonforsevenhundredthousandfrancs;onemillionsheintendedtodevotetotherecoveryoftheduGuenicestates,andtherestofherfortuneshedesiredtosettleuponSabinedeGrandlieu。Felicitehadlongknowntheplansofthedukeandduchessastothesettlementoftheirfivedaughters:theyoungestwastomarrytheVicomtedeGrandlieu,theheirtotheirducaltitle;
Clotilde-Frederique,theseconddaughter,desiredtoremainunmarried,inmemoryofamanshehaddeeplyloved,LuciendeRubempre,while,atthesametime,shedidnotwishtobecomeanunlikehereldestsister;twooftheremainingsisterswerealreadymarried,andtheyoungestbutone,theprettySabine,justtwentyyearsold,wastheonlydisposabledaughterleft。ItwasSabineonwhomFeliciteresolvedtolaytheburdenofcuringCalyste’spassionforBeatrix。
DuringthejourneytoParisMademoiselledesTouchesrevealedtothebaronessthesearrangements。ThenewhouseintheruedeBourbonwasbeingdecorated,andsheintendeditforthehomeofSabineandCalysteifherplanssucceeded。
ThepartyhadbeeninvitedtostayatthehoteldeGrandlieu,wherethebaronesswasreceivedwithallthedistinctionduetoherrankasthewifeofaduGuenicandthedaughterofaBritishpeer。
MademoiselledesTouchesurgedCalystetoseeParis,whilesheherselfmadethenecessaryinquiriesaboutBeatrixwhohaddisappearedfromtheworld,andwastravellingabroad,andshetookcaretothrowhimintothemidstofdiversionsandamusementsofallkinds。Theseasonforballsandfeteswasjustbeginning,andtheduchessandherdaughtersdidthehonorsofParistotheyoungBreton,whowasinsensiblydivertedfromhisownthoughtsbythemovementandlifeofthegreatcity。HefoundsomeresemblanceofmindbetweenMadamedeRochefideandSabinedeGrandlieu,whowascertainlyoneofthehandsomestandmostcharminggirlsinParisiansociety,andthisfanciedlikenessmadehimgivetohercoquetriesawillingattentionwhichnootherwomancouldpossiblyhaveobtainedfromhim。SabineherselfwasgreatlypleasedwithCalyste,andmatterswentsowellthatduringthewinterof1837theyoungBaronduGuenic,whoseyouthandhealthhadreturnedtohim,listenedwithoutrepugnancetohismotherwhensheremindedhimofthepromisemadetohisdyingfatherandproposedtohimamarriagewithSabinedeGrandlieu。Still,whileagreeingtofulfilhispromise,heconcealedwithinhissoulanindifferencetoallthings,ofwhichthebaronessalonewasaware,butwhichshetrustedwouldbeconqueredbythepleasuresofahappyhome。
OnthedaywhentheGrandlieufamilyandthebaroness,accompaniedbyherrelationswhocamefromEnglandforthisoccasion,assembledinthegrandsalonofthehoteldeGrandlieutosignthemarriagecontract,andLeopoldHannequin,thefamilynotary,explainedthepreliminariesofthatcontractbeforereadingit,Calyste,onwhoseforeheadeveryonepresentmighthavenoticedclouds,suddenlyandcurtlyrefusedtoacceptthebenefactionsofferedhimbyMademoiselledesTouches。DidhestillcountonFelicite’sdevotiontorecoverBeatrix?Inthemidstoftheembarrassmentandstupefactionoftheassembledfamilies,SabinedeGrandlieuenteredtheroomandgavehimaletter,explainingthatMademoiselledesToucheshadrequestedhertogiveittohimonthisoccasion。
Calysteturnedawayfromthecompanytotheembrasureofawindowandreadasfollows:——
CamilleMaupintoCalyste。
Calyste,beforeIentermyconventcellIampermittedtocastalookupontheworldIamnowtoleaveforalifeofprayerandsolitude。Thatlookistoyou,whohavebeenthewholeworldtomeintheselastmonths。Myvoicewillreachyou,ifmycalculationsdonotmiscarry,atthemomentofaceremonyIamunabletotakepartin。
Onthedaywhenyoustandbeforethealtargivingyourhandandnametoayoungandcharminggirlwhocanloveyouopenlybeforeearthandheaven,IshallbebeforeanotheraltarinaconventatNantesbetrothedforevertoHimwhowillneitherfailnorbetrayme。ButIdonotwritetosaddenyou,——onlytoentreatyounottohinderbyfalsedelicacytheserviceIhavewishedtodoyousincewefirstmet。Donotcontestmyrightssodearlybought。
Ifloveissuffering,ah!Ihavelovedyouindeed,myCalyste。Butfeelnoremorse;theonlyhappinessIhaveknowninlifeIowetoyou;thepangswerecausedbymyownself。Makemecompensation,then,forallthosepangs,thosesorrows,bycausingmeaneverlastingjoy。LetthepoorCamille,who/is/nolonger,stillbesomethinginthematerialcomfortyouenjoy。Dear,letmebelikethefragranceofflowersinyourlife,minglingmyselfwithitunseenandnotimportunate。
Toyou,Calyste,Ishallowemyeternalhappiness;willyounotacceptafewpaltryandfleetingbenefitsfromme?Surelyyouwillnotbewantingingenerosity?Doyounotseeinthisthelastmessageofarenouncedlove?Calyste,theworldwithoutyouhadnothingmoreforme;youmadeitthemostawfulofsolitudes;andyouhavethusbroughtCamilleMaupin,theunbeliever,thewriterofbooks,whichIamsoontorepudiatesolemnly——youhavecasther,daringandperverted,boundhandandfoot,beforeGod。
Iamto-daywhatImighthavebeen,whatIwasborntobe,——
innocent,andachild。Ihavewashedmyrobesinthetearsofrepentance;Icancomebeforethealtarwhithermyguardianangel,mybelovedCalyste,hasledme。WithwhattendercomfortIgiveyouthatname,whichthestepInowtakesanctifies。Iloveyouwithoutself-seeking,asamotherlovesherson,astheChurchlovesherchildren。Icanprayforyouandforyourswithoutonethoughtorwishexceptforyourhappiness。Ah!ifyouonlyknewthesublimetranquillityinwhichIlive,nowthatIhaveriseninthoughtaboveallpettyearthlyinterests,andhowpreciousisthethoughtofDOINGasyournoblemottodaysourduty,youwouldenteryourbeautifulnewlifewithunfalteringstepandneveraglancebehindyouoraboutyou。Aboveall,myearnestprayertoyouisthatyoubefaithfultoyourselfandtothosebelongingtoyou。Dear,society,inwhichyouaretolive,cannotexistwithoutthereligionofduty,andyouwillterriblymistakeit,asI
mistookit,ifyouallowyourselftoyieldtopassionandtofancy,asIdid。Womanistheequalofmanonlyinmakingherlifeacontinualoffering,asthatofmanisaperpetualaction;mylifehasbeen,onthecontrary,onelongegotism。IfmaybethatGodplacedyou,towardevening,bythedoorofmyhouse,asamessengerfromHimself,bearingmypunishmentandmypardon。
Heedthisconfessionofawomantowhomfamehasbeenlikeapharos,warningheroftheonlytruepath。Bewise,benoble;
sacrificeyourfancytoyourduties,asheadofyourrace,ashusband,asfather。RaisethefallenstandardoftheoldduGuenics;showtothiscenturyofirreligionandwantofprinciplewhatagentlemanisinallhisgrandeurandhishonor。Dearchildofmysoul,letmeplaythepartofamothertoyou;yourownmotherwillnotbejealousofthisvoicefromatomb,thesehandsupliftedtoheaven,imploringblessingsonyou。To-day,morethanever,doesrankandnobilityneedfortune。Calyste,acceptapartofmine,andmakeaworthyuseofit。Itisnotagift;itisatrustIplaceinyourhands。IhavethoughtmoreofyourchildrenandofyouroldBretonhousethanofyouinofferingyoutheprofitswhichtimehasbroughttomypropertyinParis。”Letusnowsignthecontract,”saidtheyoungbaron,returningtotheassembledcompany。
TheAbbeGrimont,towhomthehonoroftheconversionofthiscelebratedwomanwasattributed,became,soonafter,vicar-generalofthediocese。
Thefollowingweek,afterthemarriageceremony,which,accordingtothecustomofmanyfamiliesofthefaubourgSaint-Germain,wascelebratedatseveninthemorningatthechurchofSaintThomasd’Aquin,CalysteandSabinegotintotheirprettytravelling-carriage,amidthetears,embraces,andcongratulationsofascoreoffriends,collectedundertheawningofthehoteldeGrandlieu。Thecongratulationscamefromthefourwitnesses,andthemenpresent;thetearswereintheeyesoftheDuchessedeGrandlieuandherdaughterClotilde,whobothtrembledundertheweightofthesamethought,——”Sheislaunchedupontheseaoflife!PoorSabine!atthemercyofamanwhodoesnotmarryentirelyofhisownfreewill。”
Marriageisnotwhollymadeupofpleasures,——asfugitiveinthatrelationasinallothers;itinvolvescompatibilityoftemper,physicalsympathies,harmoniesofcharacter,whichmakeofthatsocialnecessityaneternalproblem。Marriageabledaughters,aswellasmothers,knowthetermsaswellasthedangersofthislottery;andthatiswhywomenweepataweddingwhilemensmile;menbelievethattheyrisknothing,whilewomenknow,orverynearlyknow,whattheyrisk。
Inanothercarriage,whichprecededthemarriedpair,wastheBaronneduGuenic,towhomtheduchesshadsaidatparting,——”Youareamother,thoughyouhaveonlyhadoneson;trytotakemyplacetomydearSabine。”
Ontheboxofthebridalcarriagesata/chasseur/,whoactedascourier,andintherumbleweretwowaiting-maids。Thefourpostilionsdressedintheirfinestuniforms,foreachcarriagewasdrawnbyfourhorses,appearedwithbouquetsontheirbreastsandribbonsontheirhats,whichtheDucdeGrandlieuhadtheutmostdifficultyinmakingthemrelinquish,evenbybribingthemwithmoney。TheFrenchpostilioniseminentlyintelligent,buthelikeshisfun。Thesefellowstooktheirbribesandreplacedtheirribbonsatthebarrier。”Well,good-bye,Sabine,”saidtheduchess;”rememberyourpromise;
writetomeoften。Calyste,Isaynothingmoretoyou,butyouunderstandme。”
Clotilde,leaningontheyoungestsisterAthenais,whowassmilingtotheVicomtedeGrandlieu,castareflectinglookthroughhertearsatthebride,andfollowedthecarriagewithhereyesasitdisappearedtotheclackingoffourwhips,morenoisythantheshotsofapistolgallery。InafewminutesthegayconvoyhadreachedtheesplanadeoftheInvalides,thebarrierofPassybythequayofthePontd’Iena,andwerefairlyonthehigh-roadtoBrittany。
IsitnotasingularthingthattheartisansofSwitzerlandandGermany,andthegreatfamiliesofFranceandEnglandshould,oneandall,followthecustomofsettingoutonajourneyafterthemarriageceremony?Thegreatpeopleshutthemselvesinaboxwhichrollsalong;
thelittlepeoplegailytramptheroads,sittingdowninthewoods,banquetingattheinns,aslongastheirjoy,orrathertheirmoneylasts。Amoralistispuzzledtodecideonwhichsideisthefinersenseofmodesty,——thatwhichhidesfromthepubliceyeandinauguratesthedomestichearthandbedinprivate,astotheworthyburghersofalllands,orthatwhichwithdrawsfromthefamilyandexhibitsitselfpubliclyonthehigh-roadsandinfaceofstrangers。
Onewouldthinkthatdelicatesoulsmightdesiresolitudeandseektoescapeboththeworldandtheirfamily。Thelovewhichbeginsamarriageisapearl,adiamond,ajewelcutbythechoicestofarts,atreasuretoburyinthedepthsofthesoul。
Whocanrelateahoneymoon,unlessitbethebride?Howmanywomenreadingthishistorywilladmittothemselvesthatthisperiodofuncertaindurationistheforecastofconjugallife?ThefirstthreelettersofSabinetohermotherwilldepictasituationnotsurprisingtosomeyoungbridesandtomanyoldwomen。Allthosewhofindthemselvesthesick-nurses,sotospeak,ofahusband’sheart,donot,asSabinedid,discoverthisatonce。ButyounggirlsofthefaubourgSaint-Germain,ifintelligent,arewomeninmind。Beforemarriage,theyhavereceivedfromtheirmothersandtheworldtheyliveinthebaptismofgoodmanners;thoughwomenofrank,anxioustohanddowntheirtraditions,donotalwaysseethebearingoftheirownlessonswhentheysaytotheirdaughters:”Thatisamotionthatmustnotbemade;””Neverlaughatsuchthings;””Noladyeverflingsherselfonasofa;shesitsdownquietly;””Praygiveupsuchdetestableways;””Mydear,thatisathingwhichisneverdone,”etc。
Manybourgeoiscriticsunjustlydenytheinnocenceandvirtueofyounggirlswho,likeSabine,aretrulyvirginatheart,improvedbythetrainingoftheirminds,bythehabitofnoblebearing,bynaturalgoodtaste,while,fromtheageofsixteen,theyhavelearnedhowtousetheiropera-glasses。Sabinewasagirlofthisschool,whichwasalsothatofMademoiselledeChaulieu。Thisinbornsenseofthefitnessofthings,thesegiftsofracemadeSabinedeGrandlieuasinterestingayoungwomanastheheroineofthe”MemoirsoftwoyoungMarriedWomen。”Herletterstohermotherduringthehoneymoon,ofwhichweheregivethreeorfour,willshowthequalitiesofhermindandtemperament。
Guerande,April,1838。
ToMadamelaDuchessedeGrandlieu:
DearMamma,——YouwillunderstandwhyIdidnotwritetoyouduringthejourney,——ourwitsarethenlikewheels。HereIam,forthelasttwodays,inthedepthsofBrittany,atthehotelduGuenic,——ahouseascoveredwithcarvingasasandal-woodbox。InspiteoftheaffectionatedevotionofCalyste’sfamily,Ifeelakeendesiretoflytoyou,totellyoumanythingswhichcanonlybetrustedtoamother。
Calystemarried,dearmamma,withagreatsorrowinhisheart。Weallknewthat,andyoudidnothidefrommethedifficultiesofmyposition;butalas!theyaregreaterthanyouthought。Ah!mydearmother,whatexperienceweacquireintheshortspaceofafewdays——Imightevensayafewhours!Allyourcounselshaveprovedfruitless;youwillseewhyfromonesentence:IloveCalysteasifhewerenotmyhusband,——thatistosay,ifIweremarriedtoanother,andweretravellingwithCalyste,IshouldloveCalysteandhatemyhusband。
Nowthinkofamanbelovedsocompletely,involuntarily,absolutely,andalltheotheradverbsyoumaychoosetoemploy,andyouwillseethatmyservitudeisestablishedinspiteofyourgoodadvice。Youtoldmetobegrand,noble,dignified,andself-
respectinginordertoobtainfromCalystethefeelingsthatareneversubjecttothechancesandchangesoflife,——esteem,honor,andtheconsiderationwhichsanctifiesawomaninthebosomofherfamily。Irememberhowyoublamed,Idaresayjustly,theyoungwomenofthepresentday,who,underpretextoflivinghappilywiththeirhusbands,beginbycompliance,flattery,familiarity,anabandonment,youcalledit,alittletoowantonawordIdidnotfullyunderstand,allofwhich,ifImustbelieveyou,arerelaysthatleadrapidlytoindifferenceandpossiblytocontempt。”RememberthatyouareaGrandlieu!”yes,Irememberthatyoutoldmeallthat——
Butoh!thatadvice,filledwiththematernaleloquenceofafemaleDaedelushashadthefateofallthingsmythological。Dear,belovedmother,couldyoueverhavesupposeditpossiblethatI
shouldbeginbythecatastrophewhich,accordingtoyou,endsthehoneymoonoftheyoungwomenofthepresentday?
WhenCalysteandIwerefairlyaloneinthetravellingcarriage,wefeltratherfoolishineachother’scompany,understandingtheimportanceofthefirstword,thefirstlook;andweboth,bewilderedbythesolemnity,lookedoutofourrespectivewindows。
Itbecamesoridiculousthatwhenwereachedthebarriermonsieurbegan,inarathertroubledtoneofvoice,asetdiscourse,prepared,nodoubt,likeotherimprovisations,towhichIlistenedwithabeatingheart,andwhichItakethelibertyofhereabridging。”MydearSabine,”hesaid,”Iwantyoutobehappy,and,aboveall,doIwishyoutobehappyinyourownway。Therefore,inthesituationinwhichweare,insteadofdeceivingourselvesmutuallyaboutourcharactersandourfeelingsbynoblecompliances,letusendeavortobetoeachotheratoncewhatweshouldbeyearshence。Thinkalwaysthatyouhaveafriendandabrotherinme,asIshallfeelIhaveasisterandafriendinyou。”
Thoughitwasallsaidwiththeutmostdelicacy,Ifoundnothinginthisfirstconjugallove-speechwhichrespondedtothefeelingsinmysoul,andIremainedpensiveafterreplyingthatIwasanimatedbythesamesentiments。Afterthisdeclarationofourrightstomutualcoldness,wetalkedofweather,relays,andsceneryinthemostcharmingmanner,——Iwithratheraforcedlittlelaugh,heabsent-mindedly。
Atlast,aswewereleavingVersailles,IturnedtoCalyste——whomIcalledmydearCalyste,andhecalledmemydearSabine——andaskedhimplainlytotellmetheeventswhichhadledhimtothepointofdeath,andtowhichIwasawarethatIowedthehappinessofbeinghiswife。Hehesitatedlong。Infact,myrequestgaverisetoalittleargumentbetweenus,whichlastedthroughthreerelays,——Iendeavoringtomaintainthepartofanobstinategirl,andtryingtosulk;hedebatingwithinhimselfthequestionwhichthenewspapersusedtoputtoCharlesX。:”Mustthekingyieldornot?”Atlast,afterpassingVerneuil,andexchangingoathsenoughtosatisfythreedynastiesnevertoreproachhimforhisfolly,andnevertotreathimcoldly,etc。,etc。,herelatedtomehisloveforMadamedeRochefide。”Idonotwish,”hesaid,inconclusion,”tohaveanysecretsbetweenus。”
Poor,dearCalyste,itseems,wasignorantthathisfriend,MademoiselledesTouches,andyouhadthoughtitrighttotellmethetruth。Well,mother,——forIcantellalltoamotherastenderasyou,——Iwasdeeplyhurtbyperceivingthathehadyieldedlesstomyrequestthantohisowndesiretotalkofthatstrangepassion。Doyoublameme,darlingmother,forhavingwishedtoreconnoitretheextentofthegrief,theopenwoundoftheheartofwhichyouwarnedme?
So,eighthoursafterreceivingtherector’sblessingatSaint-
Thomasd’Aquin,yourSabinewasintheratherfalsepositionofayoungwifelisteningtoaconfidence,fromtheverylipsofherhusband,ofhismisplacedloveforanunworthyrival。Yes,thereI
was,inthedramaofayoungwomanlearning,officially,asitwere,thatsheowedhermarriagetothedisdainfulrejectionofanoldandfadedbeauty!
Still,IgainedwhatIsought。”Whatwasthat?”youwillask。Ah!
motherdear,Ihaveseentoomuchoflovegoingonaroundmenottoknowhowtoputalittleofitintopractice。Well,Calysteendedthepoemofhismiserieswiththewarmestprotestationsofanabsoluteforgettingofwhathecalledhismadness。Allkindsofaffirmationshavetobesigned,youknow。Thehappyunhappyonetookmyhand,carriedittohislips,and,afterthat,hekeptitforalongtimeclaspedinhisown。Adeclarationfollowed。/Thatone/seemedtomemoreconformablethanthefirsttothedemandsofournewcondition,thoughourlipsneversaidaword。PerhapsI
owedittothevigorousindignationIfeltandshowedatthebadtasteofawomanfoolishenoughnottolovemybeautiful,mygloriousCalyste。
Theyarecallingmetoplayagameofcards,whichIdonotyetunderstand。Iwillfinishmyletterto-morrow。Toleaveyouatthismomenttomakeafifthat/mouche/thatisthenameofthegamecanonlybedoneinthedepthsofBrittany——Adieu。
YourSabine。
Guerande,May,1838。
ItakeupmyOdyssey。Onthethirddayyourchildrennolongerusedtheceremonious”you;”theythee’dandthou’deachotherlikelovers。Mymother-in-law,enchantedtoseeussohappy,istryingtotakeyourplacetome,dearmother,and,asoftenhappenswhenpeopleplayaparttoeffaceothermemories,shehasbeensocharmingthatsheis,/almost/,youtome。
Ithinkshehasguessedtheheroismofmyconduct,foratthebeginningofourjourneyshetriedtohideheranxietywithsuchcarethatitwasvisiblefromexcessiveprecaution。
WhenIsawthetowersofGueranderisinginthedistance,I
whisperedintheearofyourson-in-law,”Haveyoureallyforgottenher?”Myhusband,nowbecome/myangel/,can’tknowanything,Ithink,aboutsincereandsimplelove,forthewordsmadehimwildwithhappiness。Still,IthinkthedesiretoputMadamedeRochefideforeveroutofhismindledmetoofar。ButhowcouldIhelpit?Ilove,andIamhalfaPortuguese,——forIammuchmorelikeyou,mamma,thanlikemyfather。
Calysteacceptsallfrommeasspoiltchildrenacceptthings,theythinkittheirright;heisanonlychild,Irememberthat。But,betweenourselves,IwillnotgivemydaughterifIhaveanydaughterstoanonlyson。Iseeavarietyoftyrantsinanonlyson。So,mamma,wehaveratherinvertedourparts,andIamthedevotedhalfofthepair。Therearedangers,Iknow,indevotion,thoughweprofitbyit;weloseourdignity,foronething。Ifeelboundtotellyouofthewreckofthatsemi-virtue。Dignity,afterall,isonlyascreensetupbeforepride,behindwhichwerageasweplease;buthowcouldIhelpit?youwerenothere,andIsawagulfopeningbeforeme。HadIremaineduponmydignity,Ishouldhavewononlythecoldjoysorpainsofasortofbrotherhoodwhichwouldsoonhavedriftedintoindifference。Whatsortoffuturemightthathaveledto?Mydevotionhas,Iknow,mademeCalyste’sslave;butshallIregretit?Weshallsee。
Asforthepresent,Iamdelightedwithit。IloveCalyste;Ilovehimabsolutely,withthefollyofamother,whothinksthatallhersonmaydoisright,evenifhetyrannizesatrifleoverher。
Guerande,May15th。
Uptothepresentmoment,dearmamma,Ifindmarriageadelightfulaffair,Icanspendallmytendernessonthenoblestofmenwhomafoolishwomandisdainedforafiddler,——forthatwomanevidentlywasafool,andacoldfool,theworstkind!I,inmylegitimatelove,amcharitable;IamcuringhiswoundswhileIlaymyheartopentoincurableones。Yes,themoreIloveCalyste,themoreI
feelthatIshoulddieofgriefifourpresenthappinesseverceased。
ImusttellyouhowthewholefamilyandthecirclewhichmeetsatthehoteldeGuenicadoreme。Theyareallpersonagesbornundertapestriesofthehighestwarp;infact,theyseemtohavesteppedfromthoseoldtapestriesasiftoprovethattheimpossiblemayexist。Someday,whenwearealonetogether,IwilldescribetoyoumyAuntZephirine,MademoiselledePen-Hoel,theChevalierduHalga,theDemoisellesdeKergarouet,andothers。Theyall,eventothetwoservants,GasselinandMariottewhomIwishtheywouldletmetaketoParis,regardmeasanangelsentfromheaven;
theytremblewhenIspeak。Dearpeople!theyoughttobepreservedunderglass。
Mymother-in-lawhassolemnlyinstalledusintheapartmentsformerlyoccupiedbyherselfandherlatehusband。Thescenewastouching。Shesaidtous,——”Ispentmywholemarriedlife,ahappywoman,intheserooms;maytheomenbeahappyoneforyou,mychildren。”
ShehastakenCalyste’sformerroomforhers。Saintlysoul!sheseemsintentonlayingoffhermemoriesandallherconjugaldignitiestoinvestuswiththem。TheprovinceofBrittany,thistown,thisfamilyofancientmoralsandancientcustomshas,inspiteofcertainabsurditieswhichstriketheeyeofafrivolousParisiangirl,somethinginexplicable,somethinggrandioseeveninitstrifles,whichcanonlybedefinedbytheword/sacred/。
AllthetenantsofthevastdomainsofthehouseofGuenic,boughtback,asyouknow,byMademoiselledesToucheswhomwearegoingtovisitinherconvent,havebeeninabodytopaytheirrespectstous。Theseworthypeople,intheirholidaycostumes,expressingtheirgenuinejoyinthefactthatCalystehasnowbecomereallyandtrulytheirmaster,mademeunderstandBrittany,thefeudalsystemand/old/France。ThewholescenewasafestivalIcan’tdescribetoyouinwriting,butIwilltellyouaboutitwhenwemeet。Thetermsoftheleaseshavebeenproposedbythe/gars/themselves。Weshallsignthem,aftermakingatourofinspectionroundtheestates,whichhavebeenmortgagedawayfromusforonehundredandfiftyyears!MademoiselledePen-Hoeltoldmethatthe/gars/havereckoneduptherevenuesandestimatedtherentalswithaveracityandjusticeParisianswouldneverbelieve。
Westartinthreedaysonhorsebackforthistrip。Iwillwriteyouonmyreturn,dearmother。Ishallhavenothingmoretotellyouaboutmyself,formyhappinessisatitsheight——andhowcanthatbetold?Ishallwriteyouonlywhatyouknowalready,andthatis,howIloveyou。
Nantes,June,1838。
Havingnowplayedtheroleofachatelaine,adoredbyhervassalsasiftherevolutionsof1789and1830hadlowerednobanners;andafterridesthroughforests,andhaltsatfarmhouses,dinnersonoakentables,coveredwithcentenarylinen,bendingunderHomericviandsservedonantediluviandishes;afterdrinkingthechoicestwinesingobletstovolleysofmusketry,accompaniedbycriesof”LonglivetheGuenics!”tillIwasdeafened;afterballs,wheretheonlyorchestrawasabagpipe,blownbyamanfortenhours;
andafterbouquets,andyoungbrideswhowantedustoblessthem,anddownrightweariness,whichmademefindinmybedasleepI
neverknewbefore,withdelightfulawakeningswhenloveshoneradiantasthesunpouringinuponme,andscintillatingwithamillionofflies,allbuzzingintheBretondialect!——inshort,afteramostgrotesqueresidenceintheChateauduGuenic,wherethewindowsaregatesandthecowsgracepeacefullyonthegrassinthehallswhichcastlewehavesworntorepairandtoinhabitforawhileveryyeartothewildacclamationsoftheclanduGuenic,a/gars/ofwhichborehighourbanner——ouf!IamatNantes。
Butoh!whatadaywasthatwhenwearrivedattheoldcastle!Therectorcameout,mother,withallhisclergy,crownedwithflowers,toreceiveusandblessus,expressingsuchjoy,——thetearsareinmyeyesasIthinkofit。AndmynobleCalyste!whoplayedhispartofseigneurlikeapersonageinWalterScott!Mylordreceivedhistenants’homageasifhewerebackinthethirteenthcentury。Iheardthegirlsandthewomensayingtoeachother,”Oh,whatabeautifulseigneurwehave!”foralltheworldlikeanoperachorus。TheoldmentalkedofCalyste’sresemblancetotheformerGuenicswhomtheyhadknownintheiryouth。Ah!
noble,sublimeBrittany!landofbeliefandfaith!Butprogresshasgotitseyeuponit;bridgesarebeingbuilt,roadsmade,ideasarecoming,andthenfarewelltothesublime!ThepeasantswillcertainlynotbeasfreeandproudasIhavenowseenthem,whenprogresshasprovedtothemthattheyareCalyste’sequals——
if,indeed,theycouldeverbegottobelieveit。
第7章