“Swaggering,eh!What!You’llgetnothingfromme。Whatdoyou,meanbyyourinsinuations,anyhow?”
“Wherewereyoulastnight?”sheanswered。Thewordswerehotas,theycame。”WhowereyoudrivingwithonWashingtonBoulevard?
WhowereyouwithatthetheatrewhenGeorgesawyou?Doyou,thinkI’mafooltobedupedbyyou?DoyouthinkI’llsitat,homehereandtakeyour’toobusys’and’can’tcome,’whileyou,paradearoundandmakeoutthatI’munabletocome?Iwantyouto,knowthatlordlyairshavecometoanendsofarasIam,concerned。Youcan’tdictatetomenormychildren。I’mthrough,withyouentirely。”
“It’salie,“hesaid,driventoacornerandknowingnoother,excuse。
“Lie,eh!”shesaid,fiercely,butwithreturningreserve;“you,maycallitalieifyouwantto,butIknow。”
“It’salie,Itellyou,“hesaid,inalow,sharpvoice。
“You’vebeensearchingaroundforsomecheapaccusationfor,monthsandnowyouthinkyouhaveit。Youthinkyou’llspring,somethingandgettheupperhand。Well,Itellyou,youcan’t。
AslongasI’minthishouseI’mmasterofit,andyouoranyone,elsewon’tdictatetome——doyouhear?”
Hecrepttowardherwithalightinhiseyethatwasominous。
Somethinginthewoman’scool,cynical,upper-handishmanner,as,ifshewerealreadymaster,causedhimtofeelforthemomentas,ifhecouldstrangleher。
Shegazedathim——apythonessinhumour。
“I’mnotdictatingtoyou,“shereturned;“I’mtellingyouwhatI
want。”
Theanswerwassocool,sorichinbravado,thatsomehowittook,thewindoutofhissails。Hecouldnotattackher,hecouldnot,askherforproofs。Somehowhefeltevidence,law,the,remembranceofallhispropertywhichsheheldinhername,tobe,shininginherglance。Hewaslikeavessel,powerfuland,dangerous,butrollingandflounderingwithoutsail。
“AndI’mtellingyou,“hesaidintheend,slightlyrecovering,himself,“whatyou’llnotget。”
“We’llseeaboutit,“shesaid。”I’llfindoutwhatmyrights,are。Perhapsyou’lltalktoalawyer,ifyouwon’ttome。”
Itwasamagnificentplay,andhaditseffect。Hurstwoodfell,backbeaten。Heknewnowthathehadmorethanmerebluffto,contendwith。Hefeltthathewasfacetofacewithadull,proposition。Whattosayhehardlyknew。Allthemerrimenthad,goneoutoftheday。Hewasdisturbed,wretched,resentful。
Whatshouldhedo?
“Doasyouplease,“hesaid,atlast。”I’llhavenothingmoreto,dowithyou,“andouthestrode。
ChapterXXIII
ASPIRITINTRAVAIL——ONERUNGPUTBEHIND
WhenCarriereachedherownroomshehadalreadyfallenapreyto,thosedoubtsandmisgivingswhichareevertheresultofalack,ofdecision。Shecouldnotpersuadeherselfastothe,advisabilityofherpromise,orthatnow,havinggivenherword,sheoughttokeepit。Shewentoverthewholegroundin,Hurstwood’sabsence,anddiscoveredlittleobjectionsthathad,notoccurredtoherinthewarmthofthemanager’sargument。She,sawwhereshehadputherselfinapeculiarlight,namely,that,ofagreeingtomarrywhenshewasalreadysupposedlymarried。
SherememberedafewthingsDrouethaddone,andnowthatitcame,towalkingawayfromhimwithoutaword,shefeltasifshewere,doingwrong。Now,shewascomfortablysituated,andtoonewho,ismoreorlessafraidoftheworld,thisisanurgentmatter,andonewhichputsupstrange,uncannyarguments。”Youdonot,knowwhatwillcome。Therearemiserablethingsoutside。People,goa-begging。Womenarewretched。Younevercantellwhatwill,happen。Rememberthetimeyouwerehungry。Sticktowhatyou,have。”
Curiously,forallherleaningtowardsHurstwood,hehadnot,takenafirmholdonherunderstanding。Shewaslistening,smiling,approving,andyetnotfinallyagreeing。Thiswasdue,toalackofpoweronhispart,alackofthatmajestyofpassion,thatsweepsthemindfromitsseat,fusesandmeltsallarguments,andtheoriesintoatangledmass,anddestroysforthetimebeing,thereasoningpower。Thismajestyofpassionispossessedby,nearlyeverymanonceinhislife,butitisusuallyanattribute,ofyouthandconducestothefirstsuccessfulmating。
Hurstwood,beinganolderman,couldscarcelybesaidtoretain,thefireofyouth,thoughhedidpossessapassionwarmand,unreasoning。Itwasstrongenoughtoinducetheleaningtoward,himwhich,onCarrie’spart,wehaveseen。Shemighthavebeen,saidtobeimaginingherselfinlove,whenshewasnot。Women,frequentlydothis。Itflowsfromthefactthatineachexistsa,biastowardaffection,acravingforthepleasureofbeingloved。
Thelongingtobeshielded,bettered,sympathisedwith,isoneof,theattributesofthesex。This,coupledwithsentimentanda,naturaltendencytoemotion,oftenmakesrefusingdifficult。It,persuadesthemthattheyareinlove。
Onceathome,shechangedherclothesandstraightenedtherooms,forherself。Inthematterofthearrangementofthefurniture,shenevertookthehousemaid’sopinion。Thatyoungwoman,invariablyputoneoftherocking-chairsinthecorner,and,Carrieasregularlymoveditout。To-dayshehardlynoticedthat,itwasinthewrongplace,soabsorbedwassheinherown,thoughts。SheworkedabouttheroomuntilDrouetputin,appearanceatfiveo’clock。Thedrummerwasflushedandexcited,andfullofdeterminationtoknowallaboutherrelationswith,Hurstwood。Nevertheless,aftergoingoverthesubjectinhis,mindthelivelongday,hewasratherwearyofitandwishedit,overwith。Hedidnotforeseeseriousconsequencesofanysort,andyetheratherhesitatedtobegin。Carriewassittingbythe,windowwhenhecamein,rockingandlookingout。
“Well,“shesaidinnocently,wearyofherownmentaldiscussion,andwonderingathishasteandill-concealedexcitement,“what,makesyouhurryso?”
Drouethesitated,nowthathewasinherpresence,uncertainas,towhatcoursetopursue。Hewasnodiplomat。Hecouldneither,readnorsee。
“Whendidyougethome?”heaskedfoolishly。
“Oh,anhourorsoago。Whatmakesyouaskthat?”
“Youweren’there,“hesaid,“whenIcamebackthismorning,and,Ithoughtyouhadgoneout。”
“SoIdid,“saidCarriesimply。”Iwentforawalk。”
Drouetlookedatherwonderingly。Forallhislackofdignityin,suchmattershedidnotknowhowtobegin。Hestaredatherin,themostflagrantmanneruntilatlastshesaid:
“Whatmakesyoustareatmeso?What’sthematter?”
“Nothing,“heanswered。”Iwasjustthinking。”
“Justthinkingwhat?”shereturnedsmilingly,puzzledbyhis,attitude。
“Oh,nothing——nothingmuch。”
“Well,then,whatmakesyoulookso?”
Drouetwasstandingbythedresser,gazingatherinacomic,manner。Hehadlaidoffhishatandglovesandwasnowfidgeting,withthelittletoiletpieceswhichwerenearesthim。He,hesitatedtobelievethattheprettywomanbeforehimwas,involvedinanythingsounsatisfactorytohimself。Hewasvery,muchinclinedtofeelthatitwasallright,afterall。Yetthe,knowledgeimpartedtohimbythechambermaidwasranklinginhis,mind。Hewantedtoplungeinwithastraightremarkofsome,sort,butheknewnotwhat。
“Wheredidyougothismorning?”hefinallyaskedweakly。
“Why,Iwentforawalk,“saidCarrie。
“Sureyoudid?”heasked。
“Yes,whatmakesyouask?”
Shewasbeginningtoseenowthatheknewsomething。Instantly,shedrewherselfintoamorereservedposition。Hercheeks,blanchedslightly。
“Ithoughtmaybeyoudidn’t,“hesaid,beatingaboutthebushin,themostuselessmanner。
Carriegazedathim,andasshedidsoherebbingcouragehalted。
Shesawthathehimselfwashesitating,andwithawoman’s,intuitionrealisedthattherewasnooccasionforgreatalarm。
“Whatmakesyoutalklikethat?”sheasked,wrinklingherpretty,forehead。”Youactsofunnyto-night。”
“Ifeelfunny,“heanswered。
Theylookedatoneanotherforamoment,andthenDrouetplunged,desperatelyintohissubject。
“What’sthisaboutyouandHurstwood?”heasked。
“MeandHurstwood——whatdoyoumean?”
“Didn’thecomehereadozentimeswhileIwasaway?”
“Adozentimes,“repeatedCarrie,guiltily。”No,butwhatdoyou,mean?”
“Somebodysaidthatyouwentoutridingwithhimandthathecame,hereeverynight。”
“Nosuchthing,“answeredCarrie。”Itisn’ttrue。Whotoldyou,that?”
Shewasflushingscarlettotherootsofherhair,butDrouetdid,notcatchthefullhueofherface,owingtothemodifiedlight,oftheroom。HewasregainingmuchconfidenceasCarriedefended,herselfwithdenials。
“Well,someone,“hesaid。”You’resureyoudidn’t?”
“Certainly,“saidCarrie。”Youknowhowoftenhecame。”
Drouetpausedforamomentandthought。
“Iknowwhatyoutoldme,“hesaidfinally。
Hemovednervouslyabout,whileCarrielookedathimconfusedly。
“Well,IknowthatIdidn’ttellyouanysuchthingasthat,“
saidCarrie,recoveringherself。
“IfIwereyou,“wentonDrouet,ignoringherlastremark,“I
wouldn’thaveanythingtodowithhim。He’samarriedman,you,know。”
“Who——whois?”saidCarrie,stumblingattheword。
“Why,Hurstwood,“saidDrouet,notingtheeffectandfeelingthat,hewasdeliveringatellingblow。
“Hurstwood!”exclaimedCarrie,rising。Herfacehadchanged,severalshadessincethisannouncementwasmade。Shelooked,withinandwithoutherselfinahalf-dazedway。
“Whotoldyouthis?”sheasked,forgettingthatherinterestwas,outoforderandexceedinglyincriminating。
“Why,Iknowit。I’vealwaysknownit,“saidDrouet。
Carriewasfeelingaboutforarightthought。Shewasmakinga,mostmiserableshowing,andyetfeelingsweregeneratingwithin,herwhichwereanythingbutcrumblingcowardice。
“IthoughtItoldyou,“headded。
“No,youdidn’t,“shecontradicted,suddenlyrecoveringher,voice。”Youdidn’tdoanythingofthekind。”
Drouetlistenedtoherinastonishment。Thiswassomethingnew。
“IthoughtIdid,“hesaid。
Carrielookedaroundherverysolemnly,andthenwentovertothe,window。
“Yououghtn’ttohavehadanythingtodowithhim,“saidDrouet,inaninjuredtone,“afterallI’vedoneforyou。”
“You,“saidCarrie,“you!Whathaveyoudoneforme?”
Herlittlebrainhadbeensurgingwithcontradictoryfeelings——
shameatexposure,shameatHurstwood’sperfidy,angerat,Drouet’sdeception,themockeryhehadmadeather。Nowone,clearideacameintoherhead。Hewasatfault。Therewasno,doubtaboutit。WhydidhebringHurstwoodout——Hurstwood,a,marriedman,andneversayawordtoher?Nevermindnowabout,Hurstwood’sperfidy——whyhadhedonethis?Whyhadn’thewarned,her?Therehestoodnow,guiltyofthismiserablebreachof,confidenceandtalkingaboutwhathehaddoneforher!
“Well,Ilikethat,“exclaimedDrouet,littlerealisingthefire,hisremarkhadgenerated。”IthinkI’vedoneagooddeal。”
“Youhave,eh?”sheanswered。”You’vedeceivedme——that’swhat,you’vedone。You’vebroughtyouroldfriendsouthereunder,falsepretences。You’vemademeouttobe——Oh,“andwiththis,hervoicebrokeandshepressedhertwolittlehandstogether,tragically。
“Idon’tseewhatthat’sgottodowithit,“saidthedrummer,quaintly。
“No,“sheanswered,recoveringherselfandshuttingherteeth。
“No,ofcourseyoudon’tsee。Thereisn’tanythingyousee。You,couldn’thavetoldmeinthefirstplace,couldyou?Youhadto,makemeoutwronguntilitwastoolate。Nowyoucomesneaking,aroundwithyourinformationandyourtalkaboutwhatyouhave,done。”
DrouethadneversuspectedthissideofCarrie’snature。Shewas,alivewithfeeling,hereyessnapping,herlipsquivering,her,wholebodysensibleoftheinjuryshefelt,andpartakingofher,wrath。
“Who’ssneaking?”heasked,mildlyconsciousoferroronhis,part,butcertainthathewaswronged。
“Youare,“stampedCarrie。”You’reahorrid,conceitedcoward,that’swhatyouare。Ifyouhadanysenseofmanhoodinyou,you,wouldn’thavethoughtofdoinganysuchthing。”
Thedrummerstared。
“I’mnotacoward,“hesaid。”Whatdoyoumeanbygoingwith,othermen,anyway?”
“Othermen!”exclaimedCarrie。”Othermen——youknowbetterthan,that。IdidgowithMr。Hurstwood,butwhosefaultwasit?
Didn’tyoubringhimhere?Youtoldhimyourselfthatheshould,comeouthereandtakemeout。Now,afterit’sallover,you,comeandtellmethatIoughtn’ttogowithhimandthathe’sa,marriedman。”
Shepausedatthesoundofthelasttwowordsandwrungher,hands。TheknowledgeofHurstwood’sperfidywoundedherlikea,knife。
“Oh,“shesobbed,repressingherselfwonderfullyandkeepingher,eyesdry。”Oh,oh!”
“Well,Ididn’tthinkyou’dberunningaroundwithhimwhenIwas,away,“insistedDrouet。
“Didn’tthink!”saidCarrie,nowangeredtothecorebytheman’s,peculiarattitude。”Ofcoursenot。Youthoughtonlyofwhat,wouldbetoyoursatisfaction。Youthoughtyou’dmakeatoyof,me——aplaything。Well,I’llshowyouthatyouwon’t。I’llhave,nothingmoretodowithyouatall。Youcantakeyouroldthings,andkeepthem,“andunfasteningalittlepinhehadgivenher,sheflungitvigorouslyuponthefloorandbegantomoveaboutas,iftogatherupthethingswhichbelongedtoher。
BythisDrouetwasnotonlyirritatedbutfascinatedthemore。
Helookedatherinamazement,andfinallysaid:
“Idon’tseewhereyourwrathcomesin。I’vegottherightof,thisthing。Yououghtn’ttohavedoneanythingthatwasn’tright,afterallIdidforyou。”
“Whathaveyoudoneforme?”askedCarrieblazing,herhead,thrownbackandherlipsparted。
“IthinkI’vedoneagooddeal,“saidthedrummer,looking,around。”I’vegivenyoualltheclothesyouwanted,haven’tI?
I’vetakenyoueverywhereyouwantedtogo。You’vehadasmuch,asI’vehad,andmoretoo。”
Carriewasnotungrateful,whateverelsemightbesaidofher。
Insofarashermindcouldconstrue,sheacknowledgedbenefits,received。Shehardlyknewhowtoanswerthis,andyetherwrath,wasnotplacated。Shefeltthatthedrummerhadinjuredher,irreparably。
“DidIaskyouto?”shereturned。
“Well,Ididit,“saidDrouet,“andyoutookit。”
“YoutalkasthoughIhadpersuadedyou,“answeredCarrie。”You,standthereandthrowupwhatyou’vedone。Idon’twantyourold,things。I’llnothavethem。Youtakethemto-nightanddowhat,youpleasewiththem。I’llnotstayhereanotherminute。”
“That’snice!”heanswered,becomingangerednowatthesenseof,hisownapproachingloss。”Useeverythingandabusemeandthen,walkoff。That’sjustlikeawoman。Itakeyouwhenyouhaven’t,gotanything,andthenwhensomeoneelsecomesalong,whyI’mno,good。Ialwaysthoughtit’dcomeoutthatway。”
Hefeltreallyhurtashethoughtofhistreatment,andlookedas,ifhesawnowayofobtainingjustice。
“It’snotso,“saidCarrie,“andI’mnotgoingwithanybodyelse。
Youhavebeenasmiserableandinconsiderateasyoucanbe。I
hateyou,Itellyou,andIwouldn’tlivewithyouanother,minute。You’reabig,insulting“——hereshehesitatedandusedno,wordatall——“oryouwouldn’ttalkthatway。”
Shehadsecuredherhatandjacketandslippedthelatteronover,herlittleeveningdress。Somewispsofwavyhairhadloosened,fromthebandsatthesideofherheadandwerestragglingover,herhot,redcheeks。Shewasangry,mortified,grief-stricken。
Herlargeeyeswerefulloftheanguishoftears,butherlids,werenotyetwet。Shewasdistractedanduncertain,decidingand,doingthingswithoutanaimorconclusion,andshehadnotthe,slightestconceptionofhowthewholedifficultywouldend。
“Well,that’safinefinish,“saidDrouet。”Packupandpull,out,eh?Youtakethecake。Ibetyouwereknockingaroundwith,Hurstwoodoryouwouldn’tactlikethat。Idon’twanttheold,rooms。Youneedn’tpulloutforme。YoucanhavethemforallI
care,butb’George,youhaven’tdonemeright。”
“I’llnotlivewithyou,“saidCarrie。”Idon’twanttolive,withyou。You’vedonenothingbutbragaroundeversinceyou’ve,beenhere。”
“Aw,Ihaven’tanythingofthekind,“heanswered。
Carriewalkedovertothedoor。
“Whereareyougoing?”hesaid,steppingoverandheadingher,off。
“Letmeout,“shesaid。
“Whereareyougoing?”herepeated。
Hewas,aboveall,sympathetic,andthesightofCarriewandering,out,heknewnotwhere,affectedhim,despitehisgrievance。
Carriemerelypulledatthedoor。
Thestrainofthesituationwastoomuchforher,however。She,madeonemorevaineffortandthenburstintotears。
“Now,bereasonable,Cad,“saidDrouetgently。”Whatdoyouwant,torushoutforthisway?Youhaven’tanyplacetogo。Whynot,stayherenowandbequiet?I’llnotbotheryou。Idon’twantto,stayhereanylonger。”
Carriehadgonesobbingfromthedoortothewindow。Shewasso,overcomeshecouldnotspeak。
“Bereasonablenow,“hesaid。”Idon’twanttoholdyou。You,cangoifyouwantto,butwhydon’tyouthinkitover?Lord,knows,Idon’twanttostopyou。”
Hereceivednoanswer。Carriewasquieting,however,underthe,influenceofhisplea。
“Youstayherenow,andI’llgo,“headdedatlast。
Carrielistenedtothiswithmingledfeelings。Hermindwas,shakenloosefromthelittlemooringoflogicthatithad。She,wasstirredbythisthought,angeredbythat——herowninjustice,Hurstwood’s,Drouet’s,theirrespectivequalitiesofkindnessand,favour,thethreatoftheworldoutside,inwhichshehadfailed,oncebefore,theimpossibilityofthisstateinside,wherethe,chamberswerenolongerjustlyhers,theeffectoftheargument,uponhernerves,allcombinedtomakeheramassofjangling,fibres——ananchorless,storm-beatenlittlecraftwhichcoulddo,absolutelynothingbutdrift。
“Say,“saidDrouet,comingovertoherafterafewmoments,with,anewidea,andputtinghishanduponher。
“Don’t!”saidCarrie,drawingaway,butnotremovingher,handkerchieffromhereyes。
“Nevermindaboutthisquarrelnow。Letitgo。Youstayhere,untilthemonth’sout,anyhow,andthenyoucantellbetterwhat,youwanttodo。Eh?”
Carriemadenoanswer。
“You’dbetterdothat,“hesaid。”There’snouseyourpackingup,now。Youcan’tgoanywhere。”
Stillhegotnothingforhiswords。
“Ifyou’lldothat,we’llcallitoffforthepresentandI’ll,getout。”
Carrieloweredherhandkerchiefslightlyandlookedoutofthe,window。
“Willyoudothat?”heasked。
Stillnoanswer。
“Willyou?”herepeated。
Sheonlylookedvaguelyintothestreet。
“Aw!comeon,“hesaid,“tellme。Willyou?”
“Idon’tknow,“saidCarriesoftly,forcedtoanswer。
“Promisemeyou’lldothat,“hesaid,“andwe’llquittalking,aboutit。It’llbethebestthingforyou。”
Carrieheardhim,butshecouldnotbringherselftoanswer,reasonably。Shefeltthatthemanwasgentle,andthathis,interestinherhadnotabated,anditmadehersufferapangof,regret。Shewasinamosthelplessplight。
AsforDrouet,hisattitudehadbeenthatofthejealouslover。
Nowhisfeelingswereamixtureofangeratdeception,sorrowat,losingCarrie,miseryatbeingdefeated。Hewantedhisrightsin,somewayorother,andyethisrightsincludedtheretainingof,Carrie,themakingherfeelhererror。
“Willyou?”heurged。
“Well,I’llsee,“saidCarrie。
Thisleftthematterasopenasbefore,butitwassomething。It,lookedasifthequarrelwouldblowover,iftheycouldonlyget,somewayoftalkingtooneanother。Carriewasashamed,and,Drouetaggrieved。Hepretendedtotakeupthetaskofpacking,somethingsinavalise。
Now,asCarriewatchedhimoutofthecornerofhereye,certain,soundthoughtscameintoherhead。Hehaderred,true,butwhat,hadshedone?Hewaskindlyandgood-naturedforallhisegotism。
Throughoutthisargumenthehadsaidnothingveryharsh。Onthe,otherhand,therewasHurstwood——agreaterdeceiverthanhe。He,hadpretendedallthisaffection,allthispassion,andhewas,lyingtoherallthewhile。Oh,theperfidyofmen!Andshehad,lovedhim。Therecouldbenothingmoreinthatquarter。She,wouldseeHurstwoodnomore。Shewouldwritehimandlethim,knowwhatshethought。Thereuponwhatwouldshedo?Herewere,theserooms。HerewasDrouet,pleadingforhertoremain。
Evidentlythingscouldgoonheresomewhatasbefore,ifallwere,arranged。Itwouldbebetterthanthestreet,withoutaplaceto,layherhead。
AllthisshethoughtofasDrouetrummagedthedrawersfor,collarsandlabouredlongandpainstakinglyatfindingashirt-
stud。Hewasinnohurrytorushthismatter。Hefeltan,attractiontoCarriewhichwouldnotdown。Hecouldnotthink,thatthethingwouldendbyhiswalkingoutoftheroom。There,mustbesomewayround,somewaytomakeherownupthathewas,rightandshewaswrong——topatchupapeaceandshutout,Hurstwoodforever。Mercy,howheturnedattheman’sshameless,duplicity。
“Doyouthink,“hesaid,afterafewmoments’silence,“that,you’lltryandgetonthestage?”
Hewaswonderingwhatshewasintending。
“Idon’tknowwhatI’lldoyet,“saidCarrie。
“Ifyoudo,maybeIcanhelpyou。I’vegotalotoffriendsin,thatline。”
Shemadenoanswertothis。
“Don’tgoandtrytoknockaroundnowwithoutanymoney。Letme,helpyou,“hesaid。”It’snoeasythingtogoonyourownhook,here。”
Carrieonlyrockedbackandforthinherchair。
“Idon’twantyoutogoupagainstahardgamethatway。”
HebestirredhimselfaboutsomeotherdetailsandCarrierocked,on。
“Whydon’tyoutellmeallaboutthisthing,“hesaid,aftera,time,“andlet’scallitoff?Youdon’treallycarefor,Hurstwood,doyou?”
“Whydoyouwanttostartonthatagain?”saidCarrie。”Youwere,toblame。”
“No,Iwasn’t,“heanswered。
“Yes,youwere,too,“saidCarrie。”Youshouldn’thaveevertold,mesuchastoryasthat。”
“Butyoudidn’thavemuchtodowithhim,didyou?”wenton,Drouet,anxiousforhisownpeaceofmindtogetsomedirect,denialfromher。
“Iwon’ttalkaboutit,“saidCarrie,painedatthequizzical,turnthepeacearrangementhadtaken。
“What’stheuseofactinglikethatnow,Cad?”insistedthe,drummer,stoppinginhisworkandputtingupahandexpressively。
“YoumightletmeknowwhereIstand,atleast。”
“Iwon’t,“saidCarrie,feelingnorefugebutinanger。
“Whateverhashappenedisyourownfault。”
“Thenyoudocareforhim?”saidDrouet,stoppingcompletelyand,experiencingarushoffeeling。
“Oh,stop!”saidCarrie。
“Well,I’llnotbemadeafoolof,“exclaimedDrouet。”Youmay,triflearoundwithhimifyouwantto,butyoucan’tleadme。
Youcantellmeornot,justasyouwantto,butIwon’tfoolany,longer!”
Heshovedthelastfewremainingthingshehadlaidoutintohis,valiseandsnappeditwithavengeance。Thenhegrabbedhis,coat,whichhehadlaidofftowork,pickeduphisgloves,and,startedout。
“YoucangotothedeuceasfarasIamconcerned,“hesaid,as,hereachedthedoor。”I’mnosucker,“andwiththatheopenedit,withajerkandcloseditequallyvigorously。
Carrielistenedatherwindowview,moreastonishedthananything,elseatthissuddenriseofpassioninthedrummer。Shecould,hardlybelievehersenses——sogood-naturedandtractablehadhe,invariablybeen。Itwasnotforhertoseethewellspringof,humanpassion。Arealflameofloveisasubtlething。Itburns,asawill-o’-the-wisp,dancingonwardtofairylandsofdelight。
Itroarsasafurnace。Toooftenjealousyisthequalityupon,whichitfeeds。
ChapterXXIV
ASHESOFTINDER——AFACEATTHEWINDOW
ThatnightHurstwoodremaineddowntownentirely,goingtothe,PalmerHouseforabedafterhisworkwasthrough。Hewasina,feveredstateofmind,owingtotheblighthiswife’saction,threatenedtocastuponhisentirefuture。Whilehewasnotsure,howmuchsignificancemightbeattachedtothethreatshehad,made,hewassurethatherattitude,iflongcontinued,would,causehimnoendoftrouble。Shewasdetermined,andhadworsted,himinaveryimportantcontest。Howwoulditbefromnowon?He,walkedthefloorofhislittleoffice,andlaterthatofhis,room,puttingonethingandanothertogethertonoavail。
Mrs。Hurstwood,onthecontrary,haddecidednottoloseher,advantagebyinaction。Nowthatshehadpracticallycowedhim,shewouldfollowupherworkwithdemands,theacknowledgmentof,whichwouldmakeherwordLAWinthefuture。Hewouldhaveto,payherthemoneywhichshewouldnowregularlydemandorthere,wouldbetrouble。Itdidnotmatterwhathedid。Shereallydid,notcarewhetherhecamehomeanymoreornot。Thehousehold,wouldmovealongmuchmorepleasantlywithouthim,andshecould,doasshewishedwithoutconsultinganyone。Nowsheproposedto,consultalawyerandhireadetective。Shewouldfindoutat,oncejustwhatadvantagesshecouldgain。
Hurstwoodwalkedthefloor,mentallyarrangingthechiefpoints,ofhissituation。”Shehasthatpropertyinhername,“hekept,sayingtohimself。”Whatafooltrickthatwas。Curseit!What,afoolmovethatwas。”
Healsothoughtofhismanagerialposition。”Ifsheraisesarow,nowI’lllosethisthing。Theywon’thavemearoundifmyname,getsinthepapers。Myfriends,too!”Hegrewmoreangryashe,thoughtofthetalkanyactiononherpartwouldcreate。How,wouldthepaperstalkaboutit?Everymanheknewwouldbe,wondering。Hewouldhavetoexplainanddenyandmakeageneral,markofhimself。ThenMoywouldcomeandconferwithhimand,therewouldbethedeviltopay。
Manylittlewrinklesgatheredbetweenhiseyesashecontemplated,this,andhisbrowmoistened。Hesawnosolutionofanything——
notaloopholeleft。
ThroughallthisthoughtsofCarrieflasheduponhim,andthe,approachingaffairofSaturday。Tangledasallhismatterswere,hedidnotworryoverthat。Itwastheonepleasingthingin,thiswholeroutoftrouble。Hecouldarrangethat,satisfactorily,forCarriewouldbegladtowait,ifnecessary。
Hewouldseehowthingsturnedoutto-morrow,andthenhewould,talktoher。Theyweregoingtomeetasusual。Hesawonlyher,prettyfaceandneatfigureandwonderedwhylifewasnot,arrangedsothatsuchjoyashefoundwithhercouldbesteadily,maintained。Howmuchmorepleasantitwouldbe。Thenhewould,takeuphiswife’sthreatagain,andthewrinklesandmoisture,wouldreturn。
Inthemorninghecameoverfromthehotelandopenedhismail,buttherewasnothinginitoutsidetheordinaryrun。Forsome,reasonhefeltasifsomethingmightcomethatway,andwas,relievedwhenalltheenvelopeshadbeenscannedandnothing,suspiciousnoticed。Hebegantofeeltheappetitethathadbeen,wantingbeforehehadreachedtheoffice,anddecidedbefore,goingouttotheparktomeetCarrietodropinattheGrand,Pacificandhaveapotofcoffeeandsomerolls。Whilethe,dangerhadnotlessened,ithadnotasyetmaterialised,andwith,himnonewswasgoodnews。Ifhecouldonlygetplentyoftime,tothink,perhapssomethingwouldturnup。Surely,surely,this,thingwouldnotdriftalongtocatastropheandhenotfindaway,out。
Hisspiritsfell,however,when,uponreachingthepark,he,waitedandwaitedandCarriedidnotcome。Heheldhisfavourite,postforanhourormore,thenaroseandbegantowalkabout,restlessly。Couldsomethinghavehappenedouttheretokeepher,away?Couldshehavebeenreachedbyhiswife?Surelynot。So,littledidheconsiderDrouetthatitneveronceoccurredtohim,toworryabouthisfindingout。Hegrewrestlessashe,ruminated,andthendecidedthatperhapsitwasnothing。Shehad,notbeenabletogetawaythismorning。Thatwaswhynoletter,notifyinghimhadcome。Hewouldgetoneto-day。Itwould,probablybeonhisdeskwhenhegotback。Hewouldlookforit,atonce。
Afteratimehegaveupwaitinganddrearilyheadedforthe,Madisoncar。Toaddtohisdistress,thebrightblueskybecame,overcastwithlittlefleecycloudswhichshutoutthesun。The,windveeredtotheeast,andbythetimehereachedhisofficeit,wasthreateningtodrizzleallafternoon。
Hewentinandexaminedhisletters,buttherewasnothingfrom,Carrie。Fortunately,therewasnothingfromhiswifeeither。He,thankedhisstarsthathedidnothavetoconfrontthat,propositionjustnowwhenheneededtothinksomuch。Hewalked,theflooragain,pretendingtobeinanordinarymood,but,secretlytroubledbeyondtheexpressionofwords。
Atone-thirtyhewenttoRector’sforlunch,andwhenhereturned,amessengerwaswaitingforhim。Helookedatthelittlechap,withafeelingofdoubt。
“I’mtobringananswer,“saidtheboy。
Hurstwoodrecognisedhiswife’swriting。Hetoreitopenand,readwithoutashowoffeeling。Itbeganinthemostformal,mannerandwassharplyandcoldlywordedthroughout。
“IwantyoutosendthemoneyIaskedforatonce。Ineeditto,carryoutmyplans。Youcanstayawayifyouwantto。It,doesn’tmatterintheleast。ButImusthavesomemoney。So,don’tdelay,butsenditbytheboy。”
Whenhehadfinishedit,hestoodholdingitinhishands。The,audacityofthethingtookhisbreath。Itrousedhisirealso——
thedeepestelementofrevoltinhim。Hisfirstimpulsewasto,writebutfourwordsinreply——“Gotothedevil!”——buthe,compromisedbytellingtheboythattherewouldbenoreply。
Thenhesatdowninhischairandgazedwithoutseeing,contemplatingtheresultofhiswork。Whatwouldshedoabout,that?Theconfoundedwretch!Wasshegoingtotrytobulldozehim,intosubmission?Hewouldgoupthereandhaveitoutwithher,that’swhathewoulddo。Shewascarryingthingswithtoohigha,hand。Thesewerehisfirstthoughts。
Later,however,hisolddiscretionasserteditself。Something,hadtobedone。Aclimaxwasnearandshewouldnotsitidle。
Heknewherwellenoughtoknowthatwhenshehaddecidedupona,planshewouldfollowitup。Possiblymatterswouldgointoa,lawyer’shandsatonce。
“Damnher!”hesaidsoftly,withhisteethfirmlyset,“I’llmake,ithotforherifshecausesmetrouble。I’llmakeherchange,hertoneifIhavetouseforcetodoit!”
Hearosefromhischairandwentandlookedoutintothestreet。
Thelongdrizzlehadbegun。Pedestrianshadturnedupcollars,andtrousersatthebottom。Handswerehiddeninthepocketsof,theumbrellaless;umbrellaswereup。Thestreetlookedlikea,seaofroundblackclothroofs,twisting,bobbing,moving。
Trucksandvanswererattlinginanoisylineandeverywheremen,wereshieldingthemselvesasbesttheycould。Hescarcely,noticedthepicture。Hewasforeverconfrontinghiswife,demandingofhertochangeherattitudetowardhimbeforehe,workedherbodilyharm。
Atfouro’clockanothernotecame,whichsimplysaidthatifthe,moneywasnotforthcomingthateveningthematterwouldbelaid,beforeFitzgeraldandMoyonthemorrow,andotherstepswouldbe,takentogetit。
Hurstwoodalmostexclaimedoutloudattheinsistencyofthis,thing。Yes,hewouldsendherthemoney。He’dtakeittoher——
hewouldgoupthereandhaveatalkwithher,andthatatonce。
Heputonhishatandlookedaroundforhisumbrella。Hewould,havesomearrangementofthisthing。
Hecalledacabandwasdriventhroughthedrearyraintothe,NorthSide。Onthewayhistempercooledashethoughtofthe,detailsofthecase。Whatdidsheknow?Whathadshedone?Maybe,she’dgotholdofCarrie,whoknows——or——orDrouet。Perhapsshe,reallyhadevidence,andwaspreparedtofellhimasamandoes,anotherfromsecretambush。Shewasshrewd。Whyshouldshe,taunthimthiswayunlessshehadgoodgrounds?
Hebegantowishthathehadcompromisedinsomewayorother——
thathehadsentthemoney。Perhapshecoulddoituphere。He,wouldgoinandsee,anyhow。Hewouldhavenorow。Bythetime,hereachedhisownstreethewaskeenlyalivetothedifficulties,ofhissituationandwishedoverandoverthatsomesolution,wouldofferitself,thathecouldseehiswayout。Healighted,andwentupthestepstothefrontdoor,butitwaswitha,nervouspalpitationoftheheart。Hepulledouthiskeyand,triedtoinsertit,butanotherkeywasontheinside。Heshook,attheknob,butthedoorwaslocked。Thenherangthebell。No,answer。Herangagain——thistimeharder。Stillnoanswer。He,jangleditfiercelyseveraltimesinsuccession,butwithout,avail。Thenhewentbelow。
Therewasadoorwhichopenedunderthestepsintothekitchen,protectedbyanirongrating,intendedasasafeguardagainst,burglars。Whenhereachedthishenoticedthatitalsowas,boltedandthatthekitchenwindowsweredown。Whatcouldit,mean?Herangthebellandthenwaited。Finally,seeingthatno,onewascoming,heturnedandwentbacktohiscab。
“Iguessthey’vegoneout,“hesaidapologeticallytothe,individualwhowashidinghisredfaceinaloosetarpaulin,raincoat。
“Isawayounggirlupinthatwinder,“returnedthecabby。
Hurstwoodlooked,buttherewasnofacetherenow。Heclimbed,moodilyintothecab,relievedanddistressed。
Sothiswasthegame,wasit?Shuthimoutandmakehimpay。
Well,bytheLord,thatdidbeatall!
ChapterXXV
ASHESOFTINDER——THELOOSINGOFSTAYS
WhenHurstwoodgotbacktohisofficeagainhewasinagreater,quandarythanever。Lord,Lord,hethought,whathadhegot,into?Howcouldthingshavetakensuchaviolentturn,andso,quickly?Hecouldhardlyrealisehowithadallcomeabout。It,seemedamonstrous,unnatural,unwarrantedconditionwhichhad,suddenlydescendeduponhimwithouthisletorhindrance。
MeanwhilehegaveathoughtnowandthentoCarrie。Whatcould,bethetroubleinthatquarter?Noletterhadcome,nowordof,anykind,andyethereitwaslateintheeveningandshehad,agreedtomeethimthatmorning。To-morrowtheyweretohavemet,andgoneoff——where?Hesawthatintheexcitementofrecent,eventshehadnotformulatedaplanuponthatscore。Hewas,desperatelyinlove,andwouldhavetakengreatchancestowin,herunderordinarycircumstances,butnow——nowwhat?Supposing,shehadfoundoutsomething?Supposingshe,too,wrotehimand,toldhimthatsheknewall——thatshewouldhavenothingmoreto,dowithhim?Itwouldbejustlikethistohappenasthingswere,goingnow。Meanwhilehehadnotsentthemoney。
Hestrolledupanddownthepolishedflooroftheresort,his,handsinhispockets,hisbrowwrinkled,hismouthset。Hewas,gettingsomevaguecomfortoutofagoodcigar,butitwasno,panaceafortheillwhichaffectedhim。Everyonceinawhilehe,wouldclinchhisfingersandtaphisfoot——signsofthestirring,mentalprocesshewasundergoing。Hiswholenaturewas,vigorouslyandpowerfullyshakenup,andhewasfindingwhat,limitsthemindhastoendurance。Hedrankmorebrandyandsoda,thanhehadanyeveninginmonths。Hewasaltogetherafine,exampleofgreatmentalperturbation。
Forallhisstudynothingcameoftheeveningexceptthis——he,sentthemoney。Itwaswithgreatopposition,aftertwoorthree,hoursofthemosturgentmentalaffirmationanddenial,thatat,lasthegotanenvelope,placedinittherequestedamount,and,slowlysealeditup。
ThenhecalledHarry,theboyofallworkaroundtheplace。
“Youtakethistothisaddress,“hesaid,handinghimthe,envelope,“andgiveittoMrs。Hurstwood。”
“Yes,sir,“saidtheboy。
“Ifsheisn’ttherebringitback。”
“Yes,sir“
“You’veseenmywife?”heaskedasaprecautionarymeasureasthe,boyturnedtogo。
“Oh,yes,sir。Iknowher。”
“Allright,now。Hurryrightback。”
“Anyanswer?”
“Iguessnot。”
Theboyhastenedawayandthemanagerfelltohismusings。Now,hehaddoneit。Therewasnousespeculatingoverthat。Hewas,beatenforto-nightandhemightjustaswellmakethebestof,it。But,oh,thewretchednessofbeingforcedthisway!Hecould,seehermeetingtheboyatthedoorandsmilingsardonically。
Shewouldtaketheenvelopeandknowthatshehadtriumphed。If,heonlyhadthatletterbackhewouldn’tsendit。Hebreathed,heavilyandwipedthemoisturefromhisface。
Forrelief,hearoseandjoinedinconversationwithafew,friendswhoweredrinking。Hetriedtogettheinterestof,thingsabouthim,butitwasnottobe。Allthetimehis,thoughtswouldrunouttohishomeandseethescenebeing,thereinenacted。Allthetimehewaswonderingwhatshewould,saywhentheboyhandedhertheenvelope。
Inaboutanhourandthree-quarterstheboyreturned。Hehad,evidentlydeliveredthepackage,for,ashecameup,hemadeno,signoftakinganythingoutofhispocket。
“Well?”saidHurstwood。
“Igaveittoher。”
“Mywife?”
“Yes,sir。”
“Anyanswer?”
“Shesaiditwashightime。”
Hurstwoodscowledfiercely。
Therewasnomoretobedoneuponthatscorethatnight。Hewent,onbroodingoverhissituationuntilmidnight,whenherepaired,againtothePalmerHouse。Hewonderedwhatthemorningwould,bringforth,andsleptanythingbutsoundlyuponit。
Nextdayhewentagaintotheofficeandopenedhismail,suspiciousandhopefulofitscontents。NowordfromCarrie。
Nothingfromhiswife,whichwaspleasant。
Thefactthathehadsentthemoneyandthatshehadreceivedit,workedtotheeaseofhismind,for,asthethoughtthathehad,doneitreceded,hischagrinatitgrewlessandhishopeof,peacemore。Hefancied,ashesatathisdesk,thatnothing,wouldbedoneforaweekortwo。Meanwhile,hewouldhavetime,tothink。
ThisprocessofTHINKINGbeganbyareversiontoCarrieandthe,arrangementbywhichhewastogetherawayfromDrouet。How,aboutthatnow?Hispainatherfailuretomeetorwritehim,rapidlyincreasedashedevotedhimselftothissubject。He,decidedtowritehercareoftheWestSidePost-officeandask,foranexplanation,aswellastohavehermeethim。Thethought,thatthisletterwouldprobablynotreachheruntilMondaychafed,himexceedingly。Hemustgetsomespeediermethod——buthow?
Hethoughtuponitforahalf-hour,notcontemplatingamessenger,oracabdirecttothehouse,owingtotheexposureofit,but,findingthattimewasslippingawaytonopurpose,hewrotethe,letterandthenbegantothinkagain。
Thehoursslippedby,andwiththemthepossibilityoftheunion,hehadcontemplated。HehadthoughttobejoyouslyaidingCarrie,bynowinthetaskofjoiningherintereststohis,andhereit,wasafternoonandnothingdone。Threeo’clockcame,four,five,six,andnoletter。Thehelplessmanagerpacedthefloorand,grimlyenduredthegloomofdefeat。HesawabusySaturday,usheredout,theSabbathin,andnothingdone。Allday,thebar,beingclosed,hebroodedalone,shutoutfromhome,fromthe,excitementofhisresort,fromCarrie,andwithouttheabilityto,alterhisconditiononeiota。ItwastheworstSundayhehad,spentinhislife。
InMonday’ssecondmailheencounteredaverylegal-looking,letter,whichheldhisinterestforsometime。Itborethe,imprintofthelawofficesofMcGregor,JamesandHay,andwitha,veryformal“DearSir,“and“Webegtostate,“wentontoinform,himbrieflythattheyhadbeenretainedbyMrs。JuliaHurstwood,toadjustcertainmatterswhichrelatedtohersustenanceand,propertyrights,andwouldhekindlycallandseethemaboutthe,matteratonce。
Hereaditthroughcarefullyseveraltimes,andthenmerelyshook,hishead。Itseemedasifhisfamilytroubleswerejust,beginning。
“Well!”hesaidafteratime,quiteaudibly,“Idon’tknow。”
Thenhefoldeditupandputitinhispocket。
ToaddtohismiserytherewasnowordfromCarrie。Hewasquite,certainnowthatsheknewhewasmarriedandwasangeredathis,perfidy。Hislossseemedallthemorebitternowthatheneeded,hermost。Hethoughthewouldgooutandinsistonseeingherif,shedidnotsendhimwordofsomesortsoon。Hewasreally,affectedmostmiserablyofallbythisdesertion。Hehadloved,herearnestlyenough,butnowthatthepossibilityoflosingher,staredhiminthefacesheseemedmuchmoreattractive。He,reallypinedforaword,andlookedoutuponherwithhismind’s,eyeinthemostwistfulmanner。Hedidnotproposetoloseher,whatevershemightthink。Comewhatmight,hewouldadjustthis,matter,andsoon。Hewouldgotoherandtellherallhisfamily,complications。Hewouldexplaintoherjustwherehestoodand,howmuchheneededher。Surelyshecouldn’tgobackonhimnow?
Itwasn’tpossible。Hewouldpleaduntilherangerwouldmelt——
untilshewouldforgivehim。
Suddenlyhethought:“Supposingsheisn’toutthere——supposeshe,hasgone?”
Hewasforcedtotakehisfeet。Itwastoomuchtothinkofand,sitstill。
Nevertheless,hisrousingavailedhimnothing。
OnTuesdayitwasthesameway。Hedidmanagetobringhimself,intothemoodtogoouttoCarrie,butwhenhegotinOgdenPlace,hethoughthesawamanwatchinghimandwentaway。Hedidnot,gowithinablockofthehouse。
Oneofthegallingincidentsofthisvisitwasthathecameback,onaRandolphStreetcar,andwithoutnoticingarrivedalmost,oppositethebuildingoftheconcernwithwhichhissonwas,connected。Thissentapangthroughhisheart。Hehadcalledon,hisboythereseveraltimes。Nowtheladhadnotsenthima,word。Hisabsencedidnotseemtobenoticedbyeitherofhis,children。Well,well,fortuneplaysamanqueertricks。Hegot,backtohisofficeandjoinedinaconversationwithfriends。It,wasasifidlechatterdeadenedthesenseofmisery。
ThatnighthedinedatRector’sandreturnedatoncetohis,office。Inthebustleandshowofthelatterwashisonly,relief。Hetroubledovermanylittledetailsandtalked,perfunctorilytoeverybody。Hestayedathisdesklongafterall,othershadgone,andonlyquitteditwhenthenightwatchmanon,hisroundpulledatthefrontdoortoseeifitwassafely,locked。
OnWednesdayhereceivedanotherpolitenotefromMcGregor,James,andHay。Itread:
“DearSir:Webegtoinformyouthatweareinstructedtowait,untilto-morrowThursdayatoneo’clock,beforefilingsuit,againstyou,onbehalfofMrs。JuliaHurstwood,fordivorceand,alimony。Ifwedonothearfromyoubeforethattimeweshall,considerthatyoudonotwishtocompromisethematterinanyway,andactaccordingly。”Verytrulyyours,etc。”
“Compromise!”exclaimedHurstwoodbitterly。”Compromise!”
Againheshookhishead。
Sohereitwasspreadoutclearbeforehim,andnowheknewwhat,toexpect。Ifhedidn’tgoandseethemtheywouldsuehim,promptly。Ifhedid,hewouldbeofferedtermsthatwouldmake,hisbloodboil。Hefoldedtheletterandputitwiththeother,one。Thenheputonhishatandwentforaturnabouttheblock。
ChapterXXVI
THEAMBASSADORFALLEN——ASEARCHFORTHEGATE
Carrie,leftalonebyDrouet,listenedtohisretreatingsteps,scarcelyrealisingwhathadhappened。Sheknewthathehad,stormedout。Itwassomemomentsbeforeshequestionedwhether,hewouldreturn,notnowexactly,butever。Shelookedaround,herupontherooms,outofwhichtheeveninglightwasdying,and,wonderedwhyshedidnotfeelquitethesametowardsthem。She,wentovertothedresserandstruckamatch,lightingthegas。
Thenshewentbacktotherockertothink。
Itwassometimebeforeshecouldcollectherthoughts,butwhen,shedid,thistruthbegantotakeonimportance。Shewasquite,alone。SupposeDrouetdidnotcomeback?Supposesheshould,neverhearanythingmoreofhim?Thisfinearrangementof,chamberswouldnotlastlong。Shewouldhavetoquitthem。
Tohercredit,beitsaid,sheneveroncecountedonHurstwood。
Shecouldonlyapproachthatsubjectwithapangofsorrowand,regret。Foratruth,shewasrathershockedandfrightenedby,thisevidenceofhumandepravity。Hewouldhavetrickedher,withoutturninganeyelash。Shewouldhavebeenledintoanewer,andworsesituation。Andyetshecouldnotkeepoutthepictures,ofhislooksandmanners。Onlythisonedeedseemedstrangeand,miserable。Itcontrastedsharplywithallshefeltandknew,concerningtheman。
Butshewasalone。Thatwasthegreaterthoughtjustatpresent。
Howaboutthat?Wouldshegoouttoworkagain?Wouldshebegin,tolookaroundinthebusinessdistrict?Thestage!Oh,yes。
Drouethadspokenaboutthat。Wasthereanyhopethere?She,movedtoandfro,indeepandvariedthoughts,whiletheminutes,slippedawayandnightfellcompletely。Shehadhadnothingto,eat,andyetthereshesat,thinkingitover。
Sherememberedthatshewashungryandwenttothelittle,cupboardintherearroomwhereweretheremainsofoneoftheir,breakfasts。Shelookedatthesethingswithcertainmisgivings。
Thecontemplationoffoodhadmoresignificancethanusual。
Whileshewaseatingshebegantowonderhowmuchmoneyshehad。
Itstruckherasexceedinglyimportant,andwithoutadoshewent,tolookforherpurse。Itwasonthedresser,andinitwere,sevendollarsinbillsandsomechange。Shequailedasshe,thoughtoftheinsignificanceoftheamountandrejoicedbecause,therentwaspaiduntiltheendofthemonth。Shebeganalsoto,thinkwhatshewouldhavedoneifshehadgoneoutintothe,streetwhenshefirststarted。Bythesideofthatsituation,as,shelookedatitnow,thepresentseemedagreeable。Shehada,littletimeatleast,andthen,perhaps,everythingwouldcome,outallright,afterall。
Drouethadgone,butwhatofit?Hedidnotseemseriouslyangry。
Heonlyactedasifhewerehuffy。Hewouldcomeback——ofcourse,hewould。Therewashiscaneinthecorner。Herewasoneofhis,collars。Hehadlefthislightovercoatinthewardrobe。She,lookedaboutandtriedtoassureherselfwiththesightofa,dozensuchdetails,but,alas,thesecondarythoughtarrived。
Supposinghedidcomeback。Thenwhat?
Herewasanotherpropositionnearly,ifnotquite,asdisturbing。
Shewouldhavetotalkwithandexplaintohim。Hewouldwant,hertoadmitthathewasright。Itwouldbeimpossibleforher,tolivewithhim。
OnFridayCarrierememberedherappointmentwithHurstwood,and,thepassingofthehourwhensheshould,byallrightofpromise,havebeeninhiscompanyservedtokeepthecalamitywhichhad,befallenherexceedinglyfreshandclear。Inhernervousnessand,stressofmindshefeltitnecessarytoact,andconsequentlyput,onabrownstreetdress,andateleveno’clockstartedtovisit,thebusinessportiononceagain。Shemustlookforwork。
Therain,whichthreatenedattwelveandbeganatone,served,equallywelltocausehertoretraceherstepsandremainwithin,doorsasitdidtoreduceHurstwood’sspiritsandgivehima,wretchedday。
ThemorrowwasSaturday,ahalf-holidayinmanybusiness,quarters,andbesidesitwasabalmy,radiantday,withthetrees,andgrassshiningexceedinglygreenaftertherainofthenight,before。Whenshewentoutthesparrowsweretwitteringmerrily,injoyouschoruses。Shecouldnothelpfeeling,asshelooked,acrossthelovelypark,thatlifewasajoyousthingforthose,whodidnotneedtoworry,andshewishedoverandoverthat,somethingmightinterferenowtopreserveforherthecomfortable,statewhichshehadoccupied。ShedidnotwantDrouetorhis,moneywhenshethoughtofit,noranythingmoretodowith,Hurstwood,butonlythecontentandeaseofmindshehad,experienced,for,afterall,shehadbeenhappy——happier,at,least,thanshewasnowwhenconfrontedbythenecessityof,makingherwayalone。
Whenshearrivedinthebusinesspartitwasquiteeleven,o’clock,andthebusinesshadlittlelongertorun。Shedidnot,realisethisatfirst,beingaffectedbysomeoftheolddistress,whichwasaresultofherearlieradventureintothisstrenuous,andexactingquarter。Shewanderedabout,assuringherselfthat,shewasmakinguphermindtolookforsomething,andatthesame,timefeelingthatperhapsitwasnotnecessarytobeinsuch,hasteaboutit。Thethingwasdifficulttoencounter,andshe,hadafewdays。Besides,shewasnotsurethatshewasreally,facetofaceagainwiththebitterproblemofself-sustenance。
Anyhow,therewasonechangeforthebetter。Sheknewthatshe,hadimprovedinappearance。Hermannerhadvastlychanged。Her,clotheswerebecoming,andmen——well-dressedmen,someofthe,kindwhobeforehadgazedatherindifferentlyfrombehindtheir,polishedrailingsandimposingofficepartitions——nowgazedinto,herfacewithasoftlightintheireyes。Inaway,shefeltthe,powerandsatisfactionofthething,butitdidnotwholly,reassureher。Shelookedfornothingsavewhatmightcome,legitimatelyandwithouttheappearanceofspecialfavour。She,wantedsomething,butnomanshouldbuyherbyfalse,protestationsorfavour。Sheproposedtoearnherliving,honestly。
“ThisstoreclosesatoneonSaturdays,“wasapleasingand,satisfactorylegendtoseeupondoorswhichshefeltsheoughtto,enterandinquireforwork。Itgaveheranexcuse,andafter,encounteringquiteanumberofthem,andnotingthattheclock,registered12。15,shedecidedthatitwouldbenousetoseek,furtherto-day,soshegotonacarandwenttoLincolnPark。
Therewasalwayssomethingtoseethere——theflowers,the,animals,thelake——andsheflatteredherselfthatonMondayshe,wouldbeupbetimesandsearching。Besides,manythingsmight,happenbetweennowandMonday。
Sundaypassedwithequaldoubts,worries,assurances,andheaven,knowswhatvagariesofmindandspirit。Everyhalf-hourinthe,daythethoughtwouldcometohermostsharply,likethetailof,aswishingwhip,thataction——immediateaction——wasimperative。
Atothertimesshewouldlookaboutherandassureherselfthat,thingswerenotsobad——thatcertainlyshewouldcomeoutsafe,andsound。AtsuchtimesshewouldthinkofDrouet’sadvice,aboutgoingonthestage,andsawsomechanceforherselfinthat,quarter。Shedecidedtotakeupthatopportunityonthemorrow。
Accordingly,shearoseearlyMondaymorninganddressedherself,carefully。Shedidnotknowjusthowsuchapplicationswere,made,butshetookittobeamatterwhichrelatedmoredirectly,tothetheatrebuildings。Allyouhadtodowastoinquireof,someoneaboutthetheatreforthemanagerandaskfora,position。Iftherewasanything,youmightgetit,or,atleast,hecouldtellyouhow。
Shehadhadnoexperiencewiththisclassofindividuals,whatsoever,anddidnotknowthesalacityandhumourofthe,theatricaltribe。SheonlyknewofthepositionwhichMr。Hale,occupied,but,ofallthings,shedidnotwishtoencounterthat,personage,onaccountofherintimacywithhiswife。
Therewas,however,atthistime,onetheatre,theChicagoOpera,House,whichwasconsiderablyinthepubliceye,anditsmanager,DavidA。Henderson,hadafairlocalreputation。Carriehadseen,oneortwoelaborateperformancesthereandhadheardofseveral,others。SheknewnothingofHendersonnorofthemethodsof,applying,butsheinstinctivelyfeltthatthiswouldbealikely,place,andaccordinglystrolledaboutinthatneighbourhood。She,camebravelyenoughtotheshowyentranceway,withthepolished,andbegildedlobby,setwithframedpicturesoutofthecurrent,attraction,leadinguptothequietbox-office,butshecouldget,nofurther。Anotedcomicoperacomedianwasholdingforththat,week,andtheairofdistinctionandprosperityoverawedher。
Shecouldnotimaginethattherewouldbeanythinginsucha,loftysphereforher。Shealmosttrembledattheaudacitywhich,mighthavecarriedherontoaterriblerebuff。Shecouldfind,heartonlytolookatthepictureswhichwereshowyandthenwalk,out。Itseemedtoherasifshehadmadeasplendidescapeand,thatitwouldbefoolhardytothinkofapplyinginthatquarter,again。
Thislittleexperiencesettledherhuntingforoneday。She,lookedaroundelsewhere,butitwasfromtheoutside。Shegot,thelocationofseveralplayhousesfixedinhermind——notablythe,GrandOperaHouseandMcVickar’s,bothofwhichwereleadingin,attractions——andthencameaway。Herspiritswerematerially,reduced,owingtothenewlyrestoredsenseofmagnitudeofthe,greatinterestsandtheinsignificanceofherclaimsupon,society,suchassheunderstoodthemtobe。
ThatnightshewasvisitedbyMrs。Hale,whosechatterand,protractedstaymadeitimpossibletodwelluponherpredicament,orthefortuneoftheday。Beforeretiring,however,shesat,downtothink,andgaveherselfuptothemostgloomy,forebodings。Drouethadnotputinanappearance。Shehadhad,nowordfromanyquarter,shehadspentadollarofherprecious,suminprocuringfoodandpayingcarfare。Itwasevidentthat,shewouldnotendurelong。Besides,shehaddiscoveredno,resource。
InthissituationherthoughtswentouttohersisterinVan,BurenStreet,whomshehadnotseensincethenightofher,flight,andtoherhomeatColumbiaCity,whichseemednowapart,ofsomethingthatcouldnotbeagain。Shelookedfornorefuge,inthatdirection。Nothingbutsorrowwasbroughtherby,thoughtsofHurstwood,whichwouldreturn。Thathecouldhave,chosentodupeherinsoreadyamannerseemedacruelthing。
Tuesdaycame,andwithitappropriateindecisionandspeculation。
Shewasinnomood,afterherfailureofthedaybefore,to,hastenforthuponherwork-seekingerrand,andyetsherebuked,herselfforwhatsheconsideredherweaknessthedaybefore。
AccordinglyshestartedouttorevisittheChicagoOperaHouse,butpossessedscarcelyenoughcouragetoapproach。
Shedidmanagetoinquireatthebox-office,however。
“Managerofthecompanyorthehouse?”askedthesmartlydressed,individualwhotookcareofthetickets。Hewasfavourably,impressedbyCarrie’slooks。
“Idon’tknow,“saidCarrie,takenbackbythequestion。
“Youcouldn’tseethemanagerofthehouseto-day,anyhow,“
volunteeredtheyoungman。”He’soutoftown。”
Henotedherpuzzledlook,andthenadded:“Whatisityouwish,toseeabout?”
“Iwanttoseeaboutgettingaposition,“sheanswered。
“You’dbetterseethemanagerofthecompany,“hereturned,“but,heisn’therenow。”
“Whenwillhebein?”askedCarrie,somewhatrelievedbythis,information。
“Well,youmightfindhiminbetweenelevenandtwelve。He’s,hereaftertwoo’clock。”
Carriethankedhimandwalkedbrisklyout,whiletheyoungman,gazedafterherthroughoneofthesidewindowsofhisgilded,coop。
“Good-looking,“hesaidtohimself,andproceededtovisionsof,condescensionsonherpartwhichwereexceedinglyflatteringto,himself。
Oneoftheprincipalcomedycompaniesofthedaywasplayingan,engagementattheGrandOperaHouse。HereCarrieaskedtosee,themanagerofthecompany。Shelittleknewthetrivial,authorityofthisindividual,orthathadtherebeenavacancyan,actorwouldhavebeensentonfromNewYorktofillit。
“Hisofficeisupstairs,“saidamaninthebox-office。
Severalpersonswereinthemanager’soffice,twoloungingneara,window,anothertalkingtoanindividualsittingataroll-top,desk——themanager。Carrieglancednervouslyabout,andbeganto,fearthatsheshouldhavetomakeherappealbeforetheassembled,company,twoofwhom——theoccupantsofthewindow——werealready,observinghercarefully。
“Ican’tdoit,“themanagerwassaying;“it’saruleofMr。
Frohman’snevertoallowvisitorsbackofthestage。No,no!”
第8章