首页 >出版文学> Night and Day>第2章

第2章

  Theworstofitwasthatshehadnoaptitudeforliterature。Shedidnotlikephrases。Shehadevensomenaturalantipathytothatprocessofself-examination,thatperpetualefforttounderstandone'sownfeeling,andexpressitbeautifully,fitly,orenergeticallyinlanguage,whichconstitutedsogreatapartofhermother'sexistence。
  Shewas,onthecontrary,inclinedtobesilent;sheshrankfromexpressingherselfevenintalk,letaloneinwriting。Asthisdispositionwashighlyconvenientinafamilymuchgiventothemanufactureofphrases,andseemedtoargueacorrespondingcapacityforaction,shewas,fromherchildhoodeven,putinchargeofhouseholdaffairs。Shehadthereputation,whichnothinginhermannercontradicted,ofbeingthemostpracticalofpeople。Orderingmeals,directingservants,payingbills,andsocontrivingthateveryclocktickedmoreorlessaccuratelyintime,andanumberofvaseswerealwaysfulloffreshflowerswassupposedtobeanaturalendowmentofhers,and,indeed,Mrs。Hilberyoftenobservedthatitwaspoetrythewrongsideout。Fromaveryearlyage,too,shehadtoexertherselfinanothercapacity;shehadtocounselandhelpandgenerallysustainhermother。Mrs。Hilberywouldhavebeenperfectlywellabletosustainherselfiftheworldhadbeenwhattheworldisnot。Shewasbeautifullyadaptedforlifeinanotherplanet。Butthenaturalgeniusshehadforconductingaffairstherewasofnorealusetoherhere。
  Herwatch,forexample,wasaconstantsourceofsurprisetoher,andattheageofsixty-fiveshewasstillamazedattheascendancywhichrulesandreasonsexertedoverthelivesofotherpeople。Shehadneverlearntherlesson,andhadconstantlytobepunishedforherignorance。Butasthatignorancewascombinedwithafinenaturalinsightwhichsawdeepwheneveritsawatall,itwasnotpossibletowriteMrs。Hilberyoffamongthedunces;onthecontrary,shehadawayofseemingthewisestpersonintheroom。But,onthewhole,shefounditverynecessarytoseeksupportinherdaughter。
  Katharine,thus,wasamemberofaverygreatprofessionwhichhas,asyet,notitleandverylittlerecognition,althoughthelaborofmillandfactoryis,perhaps,nomoresevereandtheresultsoflessbenefittotheworld。Shelivedathome。Shediditverywell,too。
  AnyonecomingtothehouseinCheyneWalkfeltthatherewasanorderlyplace,shapely,controlled——aplacewherelifehadbeentrainedtoshowtothebestadvantage,and,thoughcomposedofdifferentelements,madetoappearharmoniousandwithacharacterofitsown。PerhapsitwasthechieftriumphofKatharine'sartthatMrs。
  Hilbery'scharacterpredominated。SheandMr。Hilberyappearedtobearichbackgroundforhermother'smorestrikingqualities。
  Silencebeing,thus,bothnaturaltoherandimposeduponher,theonlyotherremarkthathermother'sfriendswereinthehabitofmakingaboutitwasthatitwasneitherastupidsilencenoranindifferentsilence。Buttowhatqualityitoweditscharacter,sincecharacterofsomesortithad,noonetroubledthemselvestoinquire。
  Itwasunderstoodthatshewashelpinghermothertoproduceagreatbook。Shewasknowntomanagethehousehold。Shewascertainlybeautiful。Thataccountedforhersatisfactorily。Butitwouldhavebeenasurprise,notonlytootherpeoplebuttoKatharineherself,ifsomemagicwatchcouldhavetakencountofthemomentsspentinanentirelydifferentoccupationfromherostensibleone。Sittingwithfadedpapersbeforeher,shetookpartinaseriesofscenessuchasthetamingofwildponiesupontheAmericanprairies,ortheconductofavastshipinahurricaneroundablackpromontoryofrock,orinothersmorepeaceful,butmarkedbyhercompleteemancipationfromherpresentsurroundingsand,needlesstosay,byhersurpassingabilityinhernewvocation。Whenshewasridofthepretenseofpaperandpen,phrase-makingandbiography,sheturnedherattentioninamorelegitimatedirection,though,strangelyenough,shewouldratherhaveconfessedherwildestdreamsofhurricaneandprairiethanthefactthat,upstairs,aloneinherroom,sheroseearlyinthemorningorsatuplateatnightto……workatmathematics。Noforceonearthwouldhavemadeherconfessthat。Heractionswhenthusengagedwerefurtiveandsecretive,likethoseofsomenocturnalanimal。Stepshadonlytosoundonthestaircase,andsheslippedherpaperbetweentheleavesofagreatGreekdictionarywhichshehadpurloinedfromherfather'sroomforthispurpose。Itwasonlyatnight,indeed,thatshefeltsecureenoughfromsurprisetoconcentratehermindtotheutmost。
  Perhapstheunwomanlynatureofthesciencemadeherinstinctivelywishtoconcealherloveofit。Butthemoreprofoundreasonwasthatinhermindmathematicsweredirectlyopposedtoliterature。Shewouldnothavecaredtoconfesshowinfinitelyshepreferredtheexactitude,thestar-likeimpersonality,offigurestotheconfusion,agitation,andvaguenessofthefinestprose。Therewassomethingalittleunseemlyinthusopposingthetraditionofherfamily;somethingthatmadeherfeelwrong-headed,andthusmorethaneverdisposedtoshutherdesiresawayfromviewandcherishthemwithextraordinaryfondness。Againandagainshewasthinkingofsomeproblemwhensheshouldhavebeenthinkingofhergrandfather。Wakingfromthesetrances,shewouldseethathermother,too,hadlapsedintosomedreamalmostasvisionaryasherown,forthepeoplewhoplayedtheirpartsinithadlongbeennumberedamongthedead。But,seeingherownstatemirroredinhermother'sface,Katharinewouldshakeherselfawakewithasenseofirritation。Hermotherwasthelastpersonshewishedtoresemble,muchthoughsheadmiredher。Hercommonsensewouldassertitselfalmostbrutally,andMrs。Hilbery,lookingatherwithheroddsidelongglance,thatwashalfmaliciousandhalftender,wouldlikenherto“yourwickedoldUncleJudgePeter,whousedtobehearddeliveringsentenceofdeathinthebathroom。ThankHeaven,Katharine,I'venotadropofHIMinme!“
  CHAPTERIV
  Ataboutnineo'clockatnight,oneveryalternateWednesday,MissMaryDatchetmadethesameresolve,thatshewouldneveragainlendherroomsforanypurposeswhatsoever。Being,astheywere,ratherlargeandconvenientlysituatedinastreetmostlydedicatedtoofficesofftheStrand,peoplewhowishedtomeet,eitherforpurposesofenjoyment,ortodiscussart,ortoreformtheState,hadawayofsuggestingthatMaryhadbetterbeaskedtolendthemherrooms。Shealwaysmettherequestwiththesamefrownofwell-simulatedannoyance,whichpresentlydissolvedinakindofhalf-humorous,half-
  surlyshrug,asofalargedogtormentedbychildrenwhoshakeshisears。Shewouldlendherroom,butonlyonconditionthatallthearrangementsweremadebyher。Thisfortnightlymeetingofasocietyforthefreediscussionofeverythingentailedagreatdealofmoving,andpulling,andrangingoffurnitureagainstthewall,andplacingofbreakableandpreciousthingsinsafeplaces。MissDatchetwasquitecapableofliftingakitchentableonherback,ifneedwere,foralthoughwell-proportionedanddressedbecomingly,shehadtheappearanceofunusualstrengthanddetermination。
  Shewassometwenty-fiveyearsofage,butlookedolderbecausesheearned,orintendedtoearn,herownliving,andhadalreadylostthelookoftheirresponsiblespectator,andtakenonthatoftheprivateinthearmyofworkers。Hergesturesseemedtohaveacertainpurpose,themusclesroundeyesandlipsweresetratherfirmly,asthoughthesenseshadundergonesomediscipline,andwereheldreadyforacallonthem。Shehadcontractedtwofaintlinesbetweenhereyebrows,notfromanxietybutfromthought,anditwasquiteevidentthatallthefeminineinstinctsofpleasing,soothing,andcharmingwerecrossedbyothersinnowaypeculiartohersex。Fortherestshewasbrown-eyed,alittleclumsyinmovement,andsuggestedcountrybirthandadescentfromrespectablehard-workingancestors,whohadbeenmenoffaithandintegrityratherthandoubtersorfanatics。
  Attheendofafairlyhardday'sworkitwascertainlysomethingofanefforttoclearone'sroom,topullthemattressoffone'sbed,andlayitonthefloor,tofillapitcherwithcoldcoffee,andtosweepalongtableclearforplatesandcupsandsaucers,withpyramidsoflittlepinkbiscuitsbetweenthem;butwhenthesealterationswereeffected,Maryfeltalightnessofspiritcometoher,asifshehadputoffthestoutstuffofherworkinghoursandslippedoverherentirebeingsomevestureofthin,brightsilk。Shekneltbeforethefireandlookedoutintotheroom。Thelightfellsoftly,butwithclearradiance,throughshadesofyellowandbluepaper,andtheroom,whichwassetwithoneortwosofasresemblinggrassymoundsintheirlackofshape,lookedunusuallylargeandquiet。MarywasledtothinkoftheheightsofaSussexdown,andtheswellinggreencircleofsomecampofancientwarriors。Themoonlightwouldbefallingtheresopeacefullynow,andshecouldfancytheroughpathwayofsilveruponthewrinkledskinofthesea。
  “Andhereweare,“shesaid,halfaloud,halfsatirically,yetwithevidentpride,“talkingaboutart。“
  Shepulledabasketcontainingballsofdifferentlycoloredwoolsandapairofstockingswhichneededdarningtowardsher,andbegantosetherfingerstowork;whilehermind,reflectingthelassitudeofherbody,wentonperversely,conjuringupvisionsofsolitudeandquiet,andshepicturedherselflayingasideherknittingandwalkingoutontothedown,andhearingnothingbutthesheepcroppingthegrassclosetotheroots,whiletheshadowsofthelittletreesmovedveryslightlythiswayandthatinthemoonlight,asthebreezewentthroughthem。Butshewasperfectlyconsciousofherpresentsituation,andderivedsomepleasurefromthereflectionthatshecouldrejoiceequallyinsolitude,andinthepresenceofthemanyverydifferentpeoplewhowerenowmakingtheirway,bydiverspaths,acrossLondontothespotwhereshewassitting。
  Assheranherneedleinandoutofthewool,shethoughtofthevariousstagesinherownlifewhichmadeherpresentpositionseemtheculminationofsuccessivemiracles。Shethoughtofherclericalfatherinhiscountryparsonage,andofhermother'sdeath,andofherowndeterminationtoobtaineducation,andofhercollegelife,whichhadmerged,notsoverylongago,inthewonderfulmazeofLondon,whichstillseemedtoher,inspiteofherconstitutionallevel-headedness,likeavastelectriclight,castingradianceuponthemyriadsofmenandwomenwhocrowdedroundit。Andhereshewasattheverycenterofitall,thatcenterwhichwasconstantlyinthemindsofpeopleinremoteCanadianforestsandontheplainsofIndia,whentheirthoughtsturnedtoEngland。Theninemellowstrokes,bywhichshewasnowapprisedofthehour,wereamessagefromthegreatclockatWestminsteritself。Asthelastofthemdiedaway,therewasafirmknockingonherowndoor,andsheroseandopenedit。Shereturnedtotheroom,withalookofsteadypleasureinhereyes,andshewastalkingtoRalphDenham,whofollowedher。
  “Alone?“hesaid,asifhewerepleasantlysurprisedbythatfact。
  “Iamsometimesalone,“shereplied。
  “Butyouexpectagreatmanypeople,“headded,lookingroundhim。
  “It'slikearoomonthestage。Whoisitto-night?“
  “WilliamRodney,upontheElizabethanuseofmetaphor。Iexpectagoodsolidpaper,withplentyofquotationsfromtheclassics。“
  Ralphwarmedhishandsatthefire,whichwasflappingbravelyinthegrate,whileMarytookupherstockingagain。
  “IsupposeyouaretheonlywomaninLondonwhodarnsherownstockings,“heobserved。
  “I'monlyoneofagreatmanythousandsreally,“shereplied,“thoughImustadmitthatIwasthinkingmyselfveryremarkablewhenyoucamein。Andnowthatyou'rehereIdon'tthinkmyselfremarkableatall。
  Howhorridofyou!ButI'mafraidyou'remuchmoreremarkablethanI
  am。You'vedonemuchmorethanI'vedone。“
  “Ifthat'syourstandard,you'venothingtobeproudof,“saidRalphgrimly。
  “Well,ImustreflectwithEmersonthatit'sbeingandnotdoingthatmatters,“shecontinued。
  “Emerson?“Ralphexclaimed,withderision。“Youdon'tmeantosayyoureadEmerson?“
  “Perhapsitwasn'tEmerson;butwhyshouldn'tIreadEmerson?“sheasked,withatingeofanxiety。
  “There'snoreasonthatIknowof。It'sthecombinationthat'sodd——
  booksandstockings。Thecombinationisveryodd。“Butitseemedtorecommenditselftohim。Marygavealittlelaugh,expressiveofhappiness,andtheparticularstitchesthatshewasnowputtingintoherworkappearedtohertobedonewithsingulargraceandfelicity。
  Sheheldoutthestockingandlookedatitapprovingly。
  “Youalwayssaythat,“shesaid。“Iassureyouit'sacommon'combination,'asyoucallit,inthehousesoftheclergy。Theonlythingthat'soddaboutmeisthatIenjoythemboth——Emersonandthestocking。“
  Aknockwasheard,andRalphexclaimed:
  “Damnthosepeople!Iwishtheyweren'tcoming!“
  “It'sonlyMr。Turner,onthefloorbelow,“saidMary,andshefeltgratefultoMr。TurnerforhavingalarmedRalph,andforhavinggivenafalsealarm。
  “Willtherebeacrowd?“Ralphasked,afterapause。
  “There'llbetheMorrisesandtheCrashaws,andDickOsborne,andSeptimus,andallthatset。KatharineHilberyiscoming,bytheway,soWilliamRodneytoldme。“
  “KatharineHilbery!“Ralphexclaimed。
  “Youknowher?“Maryasked,withsomesurprise。
  “Iwenttoatea-partyatherhouse。“
  Marypressedhimtotellherallaboutit,andRalphwasnotatallunwillingtoexhibitproofsoftheextentofhisknowledge。HedescribedthescenewithcertainadditionsandexaggerationswhichinterestedMaryverymuch。
  “But,inspiteofwhatyousay,Idoadmireher,“shesaid。“I'veonlyseenheronceortwice,butsheseemstometobewhatonecallsa'personality。'“
  “Ididn'tmeantoabuseher。Ionlyfeltthatshewasn'tverysympathetictome。“
  “Theysayshe'sgoingtomarrythatqueercreatureRodney。“
  “MarryRodney?ThenshemustbemoredeludedthanIthoughther。“
  “Nowthat'smydoor,allright,“Maryexclaimed,carefullyputtingherwoolsaway,asasuccessionofknocksreverberatedunnecessarily,accompaniedbyasoundofpeoplestampingtheirfeetandlaughing。A
  momentlatertheroomwasfullofyoungmenandwomen,whocameinwithapeculiarlookofexpectation,exclaimed“Oh!“whentheysawDenham,andthenstoodstill,gapingratherfoolishly。
  Theroomverysooncontainedbetweentwentyandthirtypeople,whofoundseatsforthemostpartuponthefloor,occupyingthemattresses,andhunchingthemselvestogetherintotriangularshapes。
  Theywereallyoungandsomeofthemseemedtomakeaprotestbytheirhairanddress,andsomethingsomberandtruculentintheexpressionoftheirfaces,againstthemorenormaltype,whowouldhavepassedunnoticedinanomnibusoranundergroundrailway。Itwasnotablethatthetalkwasconfinedtogroups,andwas,atfirst,entirelyspasmodicincharacter,andmutteredinundertonesasifthespeakersweresuspiciousoftheirfellow-guests。
  KatharineHilberycameinratherlate,andtookupapositiononthefloor,withherbackagainstthewall。Shelookedroundquickly,recognizedabouthalfadozenpeople,towhomshenodded,butfailedtoseeRalph,or,ifso,hadalreadyforgottentoattachanynametohim。ButinasecondtheseheterogeneouselementswereallunitedbythevoiceofMr。Rodney,whosuddenlystrodeuptothetable,andbeganveryrapidlyinhigh-strainedtones:
  “InundertakingtospeakoftheElizabethanuseofmetaphorinpoetry——“
  Allthedifferentheadsswungslightlyorsteadiedthemselvesintoapositioninwhichtheycouldgazestraightatthespeaker'sface,andthesamerathersolemnexpressionwasvisibleonallofthem。But,atthesametime,eventhefacesthatweremostexposedtoview,andthereforemosttautlyundercontrol,disclosedasuddenimpulsivetremorwhich,unlessdirectlychecked,wouldhavedevelopedintoanoutburstoflaughter。ThefirstsightofMr。Rodneywasirresistiblyludicrous。Hewasveryredintheface,whetherfromthecoolNovembernightornervousness,andeverymovement,fromthewayhewrunghishandstothewayhejerkedhisheadtorightandleft,asthoughavisiondrewhimnowtothedoor,nowtothewindow,bespokehishorriblediscomfortunderthestareofsomanyeyes。Hewasscrupulouslywelldressed,andapearlinthecenterofhistieseemedtogivehimatouchofaristocraticopulence。Buttheratherprominenteyesandtheimpulsivestammeringmanner,whichseemedtoindicateatorrentofideasintermittentlypressingforutteranceandalwayscheckedintheircoursebyaclutchofnervousness,drewnopity,asinthecaseofamoreimposingpersonage,butadesiretolaugh,whichwas,however,entirelylackinginmalice。Mr。Rodneywasevidentlysopainfullyconsciousoftheoddityofhisappearance,andhisveryrednessandthestartstowhichhisbodywasliablegavesuchproofofhisowndiscomfort,thattherewassomethingendearinginthisridiculoussusceptibility,althoughmostpeoplewouldprobablyhaveechoedDenham'sprivateexclamation,“Fancymarryingacreaturelikethat!“
  Hispaperwascarefullywrittenout,butinspiteofthisprecautionMr。Rodneymanagedtoturnovertwosheetsinsteadofone,tochoosethewrongsentencewheretwowerewrittentogether,andtodiscoverhisownhandwritingsuddenlyillegible。Whenhefoundhimselfpossessedofacoherentpassage,heshookitathisaudiencealmostaggressively,andthenfumbledforanother。Afteradistressingsearchafreshdiscoverywouldbemade,andproducedinthesameway,until,bymeansofrepeatedattacks,hehadstirredhisaudiencetoadegreeofanimationquiteremarkableinthesegatherings。Whethertheywerestirredbyhisenthusiasmforpoetryorbythecontortionswhichahumanbeingwasgoingthroughfortheirbenefit,itwouldbehardtosay。AtlengthMr。Rodneysatdownimpulsivelyinthemiddleofasentence,and,afterapauseofbewilderment,theaudienceexpresseditsreliefatbeingabletolaughaloudinadecidedoutburstofapplause。
  Mr。Rodneyacknowledgedthiswithawildglanceroundhim,and,insteadofwaitingtoanswerquestions,hejumpedup,thrusthimselfthroughtheseatedbodiesintothecornerwhereKatharinewassitting,andexclaimed,veryaudibly:
  “Well,Katharine,IhopeI'vemadeabigenoughfoolofmyselfevenforyou!Itwasterrible!terrible!terrible!“
  “Hush!Youmustanswertheirquestions,“Katharinewhispered,desiring,atallcosts,tokeephimquiet。Oddlyenough,whenthespeakerwasnolongerinfrontofthem,thereseemedtobemuchthatwassuggestiveinwhathehadsaid。Atanyrate,apale-facedyoungmanwithsadeyeswasalreadyonhisfeet,deliveringanaccuratelywordedspeechwithperfectcomposure。WilliamRodneylistenedwithacuriousliftingofhisupperlip,althoughhisfacewasstillquiveringslightlywithemotion。
  “Idiot!“hewhispered。“He'smisunderstoodeverywordIsaid!“
  “Wellthen,answerhim,“Katharinewhisperedback。
  “No,Ishan't!They'donlylaughatme。WhydidIletyoupersuademethatthesesortofpeoplecareforliterature?“hecontinued。
  TherewasmuchtobesaidbothforandagainstMr。Rodney'spaper。Ithadbeencrammedwithassertionsthatsuch-and-suchpassages,takenliberallyfromEnglish,French,andItalian,arethesupremepearlsofliterature。Further,hewasfondofusingmetaphorswhich,compoundedinthestudy,wereapttosoundeithercrampedoroutofplaceashedeliveredtheminfragments。Literaturewasafreshgarlandofspringflowers,hesaid,inwhichyew-berriesandthepurplenightshademingledwiththevarioustintsoftheanemone;andsomehoworotherthisgarlandencircledmarblebrows。Hehadreadverybadlysomeverybeautifulquotations。Butthroughhismannerandhisconfusionoflanguagetherehademergedsomepassionoffeelingwhich,ashespoke,formedinthemajorityoftheaudiencealittlepictureoranideawhicheachnowwaseagertogiveexpressionto。Mostofthepeoplethereproposedtospendtheirlivesinthepracticeeitherofwritingorpainting,andmerelybylookingatthemitcouldbeseenthat,astheylistenedtoMr。Purvisfirst,andthentoMr。Greenhalgh,theywereseeingsomethingdonebythesegentlementoapossessionwhichtheythoughttobetheirown。Onepersonafteranotherrose,and,aswithanill-balancedaxe,attemptedtohewouthisconceptionofartalittlemoreclearly,andsatdownwiththefeelingthat,forsomereasonwhichhecouldnotgrasp,hisstrokeshadgoneawry。Astheysatdowntheyturnedalmostinvariablytothepersonsittingnextthem,andrectifiedandcontinuedwhattheyhadjustsaidinpublic。
  Beforelong,therefore,thegroupsonthemattressesandthegroupsonthechairswereallincommunicationwitheachother,andMaryDatchet,whohadbeguntodarnstockingsagain,stoopeddownandremarkedtoRalph:
  “ThatwaswhatIcallafirst-ratepaper。“
  Bothoftheminstinctivelyturnedtheireyesinthedirectionofthereaderofthepaper。Hewaslyingbackagainstthewall,withhiseyesapparentlyshut,andhischinsunkuponhiscollar。Katharinewasturningoverthepagesofhismanuscriptasifshewerelookingforsomepassagethathadparticularlystruckher,andhadadifficultyinfindingit。
  “Let'sgoandtellhimhowmuchwelikedit,“saidMary,thussuggestinganactionwhichRalphwasanxioustotake,thoughwithoutherhewouldhavebeentooproudtodoit,forhesuspectedthathehadmoreinterestinKatharinethanshehadinhim。
  “Thatwasaveryinterestingpaper,“Marybegan,withoutanyshyness,seatingherselfontheflooroppositetoRodneyandKatharine。“Willyoulendmethemanuscripttoreadinpeace?“
  Rodney,whohadopenedhiseyesontheirapproach,regardedherforamomentinsuspicioussilence。
  “Doyousaythatmerelytodisguisethefactofmyridiculousfailure?“heasked。
  Katharinelookedupfromherreadingwithasmile。
  “Hesayshedoesn'tmindwhatwethinkofhim,“sheremarked。“Hesayswedon'tcarearapforartofanykind。“
  “Iaskedhertopityme,andsheteasesme!“Rodneyexclaimed。
  “Idon'tintendtopityyou,Mr。Rodney,“Maryremarked,kindly,butfirmly。“Whenapaper'safailure,nobodysaysanything,whereasnow,justlistentothem!“
  Thesound,whichfilledtheroom,withitshurryofshortsyllables,itssuddenpauses,anditssuddenattacks,mightbecomparedtosomeanimalhubbub,franticandinarticulate。
  “D'youthinkthat'sallaboutmypaper?“Rodneyinquired,afteramoment'sattention,withadistinctbrighteningofexpression。
  “Ofcourseitis,“saidMary。“Itwasaverysuggestivepaper。“
  SheturnedtoDenhamforconfirmation,andhecorroboratedher。
  “It'sthetenminutesafterapaperisreadthatproveswhetherit'sbeenasuccessornot,“hesaid。“IfIwereyou,Rodney,Ishouldbeverypleasedwithmyself。“
  ThiscommendationseemedtocomfortMr。Rodneycompletely,andhebegantobethinkhimofallthepassagesinhispaperwhichdeservedtobecalled“suggestive。“
  “Didyouagreeatall,Denham,withwhatIsaidaboutShakespeare'slateruseofimagery?I'mafraidIdidn'taltogethermakemymeaningplain。“
  Herehegatheredhimselftogether,andbymeansofaseriesoffrog-likejerks,succeededinbringinghimselfclosetoDenham。
  Denhamansweredhimwiththebrevitywhichistheresultofhavinganothersentenceinthemindtobeaddressedtoanotherperson。HewishedtosaytoKatharine:“Didyouremembertogetthatpictureglazedbeforeyourauntcametodinner?“but,besideshavingtoanswerRodney,hewasnotsurethattheremark,withitsassertionofintimacy,wouldnotstrikeKatharineasimpertinent。Shewaslisteningtowhatsomeoneinanothergroupwassaying。Rodney,meanwhile,wastalkingabouttheElizabethandramatists。
  Hewasacurious-lookingmansince,uponfirstsight,especiallyifhechancedtobetalkingwithanimation,heappeared,insomeway,ridiculous;but,nextmoment,inrepose,hisface,withitslargenose,thincheeksandlipsexpressingtheutmostsensibility,somehowrecalledaRomanheadboundwithlaurel,cutuponacircleofsemi-
  transparentreddishstone。Ithaddignityandcharacter。ByprofessionaclerkinaGovernmentoffice,hewasoneofthosemartyredspiritstowhomliteratureisatonceasourceofdivinejoyandofalmostintolerableirritation。Notcontenttorestintheirloveofit,theymustattempttopractiseitthemselves,andtheyaregenerallyendowedwithverylittlefacilityincomposition。Theycondemnwhatevertheyproduce。Moreover,theviolenceoftheirfeelingsissuchthattheyseldommeetwithadequatesympathy,andbeingrenderedverysensitivebytheircultivatedperceptions,sufferconstantslightsbothtotheirownpersonsandtothethingtheyworship。ButRodneycouldneverresistmakingtrialofthesympathiesofanyonewhoseemedfavorablydisposed,andDenham'spraisehadstimulatedhisverysusceptiblevanity。
  “YourememberthepassagejustbeforethedeathoftheDuchess?“hecontinued,edgingstillclosertoDenham,andadjustinghiselbowandkneeinanincrediblyangularcombination。Here,Katharine,whohadbeencutoffbythesemaneuversfromallcommunicationwiththeouterworld,rose,andseatedherselfuponthewindow-sill,whereshewasjoinedbyMaryDatchet。Thetwoyoungwomencouldthussurveythewholeparty。Denhamlookedafterthem,andmadeasifheweretearinghandfulsofgrassupbytherootsfromthecarpet。Butasitfellinaccuratelywithhisconceptionoflifethatallone'sdesireswereboundtobefrustrated,heconcentratedhisminduponliterature,anddetermined,philosophically,togetwhathecouldoutofthat。
  Katharinewaspleasantlyexcited。Avarietyofcourseswasopentoher。Sheknewseveralpeopleslightly,andatanymomentoneofthemmightrisefromthefloorandcomeandspeaktoher;ontheotherhand,shemightselectsomebodyforherself,orshemightstrikeintoRodney'sdiscourse,towhichshewasintermittentlyattentive。ShewasconsciousofMary'sbodybesideher,but,atthesametime,theconsciousnessofbeingbothofthemwomenmadeitunnecessarytospeaktoher。ButMary,feeling,asshehadsaid,thatKatharinewasa“personality,“wishedsomuchtospeaktoherthatinafewmomentsshedid。
  “They'reexactlylikeaflockofsheep,aren'tthey?“shesaid,referringtothenoisethatrosefromthescatteredbodiesbeneathher。
  Katharineturnedandsmiled。
  “Iwonderwhatthey'remakingsuchanoiseabout?“shesaid。
  “TheElizabethans,Isuppose。“
  “No,Idon'tthinkit'sgotanythingtodowiththeElizabethans。
  There!Didn'tyouhearthemsay,'InsuranceBill'?“
  “Iwonderwhymenalwaystalkaboutpolitics?“Maryspeculated。“I
  suppose,ifwehadvotes,weshould,too。“
  “Idaresayweshould。Andyouspendyourlifeingettingusvotes,don'tyou?“
  “Ido,“saidMary,stoutly。“FromtentosixeverydayI'matit。“
  KatharinelookedatRalphDenham,whowasnowpoundinghiswaythroughthemetaphysicsofmetaphorwithRodney,andwasremindedofhistalkthatSundayafternoon。SheconnectedhimvaguelywithMary。
  “Isupposeyou'reoneofthepeoplewhothinkweshouldallhaveprofessions,“shesaid,ratherdistantly,asiffeelingherwayamongthephantomsofanunknownworld。
  “Ohdearno,“saidMaryatonce。
  “Well,IthinkIdo,“Katharinecontinued,withhalfasigh。“Youwillalwaysbeabletosaythatyou'vedonesomething,whereas,inacrowdlikethis,Ifeelrathermelancholy。“
  “Inacrowd?Whyinacrowd?“Maryasked,deepeningthetwolinesbetweenhereyes,andhoistingherselfnearertoKatharineuponthewindow-sill。
  “Don'tyouseehowmanydifferentthingsthesepeoplecareabout?AndIwanttobeatthemdown——Ionlymean,“shecorrectedherself,“thatI
  wanttoassertmyself,andit'sdifficult,ifonehasn'taprofession。“
  Marysmiled,thinkingthattobeatpeopledownwasaprocessthatshouldpresentnodifficultytoMissKatharineHilbery。Theykneweachothersoslightlythatthebeginningofintimacy,whichKatharineseemedtoinitiatebytalkingaboutherself,hadsomethingsolemninit,andtheyweresilent,asiftodecidewhethertoproceedornot。
  Theytestedtheground。
  “Ah,butIwanttotrampleupontheirprostratebodies!“Katharineannounced,amomentlater,withalaugh,asifatthetrainofthoughtwhichhadledhertothisconclusion。
  “Onedoesn'tnecessarilytrampleuponpeople'sbodiesbecauseonerunsanoffice,“Maryremarked。
  “No。Perhapsnot,“Katharinereplied。Theconversationlapsed,andMarysawKatharinelookingoutintotheroomrathermoodilywithclosedlips,thedesiretotalkaboutherselfortoinitiateafriendshiphaving,apparently,lefther。Marywasstruckbyhercapacityforbeingthuseasilysilent,andoccupiedwithherownthoughts。Itwasahabitthatspokeoflonelinessandamindthinkingforitself。WhenKatharineremainedsilentMarywasslightlyembarrassed。
  “Yes,they'reverylikesheep,“sherepeated,foolishly。
  “Andyettheyareveryclever——atleast,“Katharineadded,“IsupposetheyhaveallreadWebster。“
  “Surelyyoudon'tthinkthataproofofcleverness?I'vereadWebster,I'vereadBenJonson,butIdon'tthinkmyselfclever——notexactly,atleast。“
  “Ithinkyoumustbeveryclever,“Katharineobserved。
  “Why?BecauseIrunanoffice?“
  “Iwasn'tthinkingofthat。Iwasthinkinghowyoulivealoneinthisroom,andhaveparties。“
  Maryreflectedforasecond。
  “Itmeans,chiefly,apowerofbeingdisagreeabletoone'sownfamily,Ithink。Ihavethat,perhaps。Ididn'twanttoliveathome,andI
  toldmyfather。Hedidn'tlikeit……ButthenIhaveasister,andyouhaven't,haveyou?“
  “No,Ihaven'tanysisters。“
  “Youarewritingalifeofyourgrandfather?“Marypursued。
  Katharineseemedinstantlytobeconfrontedbysomefamiliarthoughtfromwhichshewishedtoescape。Shereplied,“Yes,Iamhelpingmymother,“insuchawaythatMaryfeltherselfbaffled,andputbackagainintothepositioninwhichshehadbeenatthebeginningoftheirtalk。ItseemedtoherthatKatharinepossessedacuriouspowerofdrawingnearandreceding,whichsentalternateemotionsthroughherfarmorequicklythanwasusual,andkeptherinaconditionofcuriousalertness。Desiringtoclassifyher,Marybethoughtheroftheconvenientterm“egoist。“
  “She'sanegoist,“shesaidtoherself,andstoredthatworduptogivetoRalphonedaywhen,asitwouldcertainlyfallout,theywerediscussingMissHilbery。
  “Heavens,whatamessthere'llbeto-morrowmorning!“Katharineexclaimed。“Ihopeyoudon'tsleepinthisroom,MissDatchet?“
  Marylaughed。
  “Whatareyoulaughingat?“Katharinedemanded。
  “Iwon'ttellyou。“
  “Letmeguess。YouwerelaughingbecauseyouthoughtI'dchangedtheconversation?“
  “No。“
  “Becauseyouthink——“Shepaused。
  “Ifyouwanttoknow,IwaslaughingatthewayyousaidMissDatchet。“
  “Mary,then。Mary,Mary,Mary。“
  Sosaying,Katharinedrewbackthecurtaininorder,perhaps,toconcealthemomentaryflushofpleasurewhichiscausedbycomingperceptiblynearertoanotherperson。
  “MaryDatchet,“saidMary。“It'snotsuchanimposingnameasKatharineHilbery,I'mafraid。“
  Theybothlookedoutofthewindow,firstupatthehardsilvermoon,stationaryamongahurryoflittlegrey-blueclouds,andthendownupontheroofsofLondon,withalltheiruprightchimneys,andthenbelowthemattheemptymoonlitpavementofthestreet,uponwhichthejointofeachpaving-stonewasclearlymarkedout。MarythensawKatharineraisehereyesagaintothemoon,withacontemplativelookinthem,asthoughsheweresettingthatmoonagainstthemoonofothernights,heldinmemory。Someoneintheroombehindthemmadeajokeaboutstar-gazing,whichdestroyedtheirpleasureinit,andtheylookedbackintotheroomagain。
  Ralphhadbeenwatchingforthismoment,andheinstantlyproducedhissentence。
  “Iwonder,MissHilbery,whetheryourememberedtogetthatpictureglazed?“Hisvoiceshowedthatthequestionwasonethathadbeenprepared。
  “Oh,youidiot!“Maryexclaimed,verynearlyaloud,withasensethatRalphhadsaidsomethingverystupid。So,afterthreelessonsinLatingrammar,onemightcorrectafellowstudent,whoseknowledgedidnotembracetheablativeof“mensa。“
  “Picture——whatpicture?“Katharineasked。“Oh,athome,youmean——thatSundayafternoon。WasitthedayMr。Fortescuecame?Yes,IthinkI
  rememberedit。“
  Thethreeofthemstoodforamomentawkwardlysilent,andthenMarylefttheminordertoseethatthegreatpitcherofcoffeewasproperlyhandled,forbeneathallhereducationshepreservedtheanxietiesofonewhoownschina。
  Ralphcouldthinkofnothingfurthertosay;butcouldonehavestrippedoffhismaskofflesh,onewouldhaveseenthathiswill-
  powerwasrigidlysetuponasingleobject——thatMissHilberyshouldobeyhim。Hewishedhertostaythereuntil,bysomemeasuresnotyetapparenttohim,hehadconqueredherinterest。Thesestatesofmindtransmitthemselvesveryoftenwithouttheuseoflanguage,anditwasevidenttoKatharinethatthisyoungmanhadfixedhisminduponher。
  Sheinstantlyrecalledherfirstimpressionsofhim,andsawherselfagainprofferingfamilyrelics。SherevertedtothestateofmindinwhichhehadleftherthatSundayafternoon。Shesupposedthathejudgedherveryseverely。Shearguednaturallythat,ifthiswerethecase,theburdenoftheconversationshouldrestwithhim。Butshesubmittedsofarastostandperfectlystill,hereyesupontheoppositewall,andherlipsverynearlyclosed,thoughthedesiretolaughstirredthemslightly。
  “Youknowthenamesofthestars,Isuppose?“Denhamremarked,andfromthetoneofhisvoiceonemighthavethoughtthathegrudgedKatharinetheknowledgeheattributedtoher。
  Shekepthervoicesteadywithsomedifficulty。
  “IknowhowtofindthePolestarifI'mlost。“
  “Idon'tsupposethatoftenhappenstoyou。“
  “No。Nothinginterestingeverhappenstome,“shesaid。
  “Ithinkyoumakeasystemofsayingdisagreeablethings,MissHilbery,“hebrokeout,againgoingfurtherthanhemeantto。“I
  supposeit'soneofthecharacteristicsofyourclass。Theynevertalkseriouslytotheirinferiors。“
  Whetheritwasthattheyweremeetingonneutralgroundto-night,orwhetherthecarelessnessofanoldgreycoatthatDenhamworegaveaneasetohisbearingthathelackedinconventionaldress,Katharinecertainlyfeltnoimpulsetoconsiderhimoutsidetheparticularsetinwhichshelived。
  “Inwhatsenseareyoumyinferior?“sheasked,lookingathimgravely,asthoughhonestlysearchingforhismeaning。Thelookgavehimgreatpleasure。Forthefirsttimehefelthimselfonperfectlyequaltermswithawomanwhomhewishedtothinkwellofhim,althoughhecouldnothaveexplainedwhyheropinionofhimmatteredonewayoranother。Perhaps,afterall,heonlywantedtohavesomethingofhertotakehometothinkabout。Buthewasnotdestinedtoprofitbyhisadvantage。
  “Idon'tthinkIunderstandwhatyoumean,“Katharinerepeated,andthenshewasobligedtostopandanswersomeonewhowishedtoknowwhethershewouldbuyaticketforanoperafromthem,atareduction。
  Indeed,thetemperofthemeetingwasnowunfavorabletoseparateconversation;ithadbecomeratherdebauchedandhilarious,andpeoplewhoscarcelykneweachotherweremakinguseofChristiannameswithapparentcordiality,andhadreachedthatkindofgaytoleranceandgeneralfriendlinesswhichhumanbeingsinEnglandonlyattainaftersittingtogetherforthreehoursorso,andthefirstcoldblastintheairofthestreetfreezesthemintoisolationoncemore。Cloakswerebeingflungroundtheshoulders,hatsswiftlypinnedtothehead;
  andDenhamhadthemortificationofseeingKatharinehelpedtoprepareherselfbytheridiculousRodney。Itwasnottheconventionofthemeetingtosaygood-bye,ornecessarilyeventonodtothepersonwithwhomonewastalking;but,nevertheless,DenhamwasdisappointedbythecompletenesswithwhichKatharinepartedfromhim,withoutanyattempttofinishhersentence。SheleftwithRodney。
  CHAPTERV
  DenhamhadnoconsciousintentionoffollowingKatharine,but,seeingherdepart,hetookhishatandranrathermorequicklydownthestairsthanhewouldhavedoneifKatharinehadnotbeeninfrontofhim。Heovertookafriendofhis,bynameHarrySandys,whowasgoingthesameway,andtheywalkedtogetherafewpacesbehindKatharineandRodney。
  Thenightwasverystill,andonsuchnights,whenthetrafficthinsaway,thewalkerbecomesconsciousofthemooninthestreet,asifthecurtainsoftheskyhadbeendrawnapart,andtheheavenlaybare,asitdoesinthecountry。Theairwassoftlycool,sothatpeoplewhohadbeensittingtalkinginacrowdfounditpleasanttowalkalittlebeforedecidingtostopanomnibusorencounterlightagaininanundergroundrailway。Sandys,whowasabarristerwithaphilosophictendency,tookouthispipe,litit,murmured“hum“and“ha,“andwassilent。Thecoupleinfrontofthemkepttheirdistanceaccurately,andappeared,sofarasDenhamcouldjudgebythewaytheyturnedtowardseachother,tobetalkingveryconstantly。Heobservedthatwhenapedestriangoingtheoppositewayforcedthemtoparttheycametogetheragaindirectlyafterwards。WithoutintendingtowatchthemheneverquitelostsightoftheyellowscarftwistedroundKatharine'shead,orthelightovercoatwhichmadeRodneylookfashionableamongthecrowd。AttheStrandhesupposedthattheywouldseparate,butinsteadtheycrossedtheroad,andtooktheirwaydownoneofthenarrowpassageswhichleadthroughancientcourtstotheriver。AmongthecrowdofpeopleinthebigthoroughfaresRodneyseemedmerelytobelendingKatharinehisescort,butnow,whenpassengerswererareandthefootstepsofthecoupleweredistinctlyheardinthesilence,Denhamcouldnothelppicturingtohimselfsomechangeintheirconversation。Theeffectofthelightandshadow,whichseemedtoincreasetheirheight,wastomakethemmysteriousandsignificant,sothatDenhamhadnofeelingofirritationwithKatharine,butratherahalf-dreamyacquiescenceinthecourseoftheworld。Yes,shedidverywelltodreamabout——butSandyshadsuddenlybeguntotalk。Hewasasolitarymanwhohadmadehisfriendsatcollegeandalwaysaddressedthemasiftheywerestillundergraduatesarguinginhisroom,thoughmanymonthsorevenyearshadpassedinsomecasesbetweenthelastsentenceandthepresentone。Themethodwasalittlesingular,butveryrestful,foritseemedtoignorecompletelyallaccidentsofhumanlife,andtospanverydeepabysseswithafewsimplewords。
  Onthisoccasionhebegan,whiletheywaitedforaminuteontheedgeoftheStrand:
  “IhearthatBennetthasgivenuphistheoryoftruth。“
  Denhamreturnedasuitableanswer,andheproceededtoexplainhowthisdecisionhadbeenarrivedat,andwhatchangesitinvolvedinthephilosophywhichtheybothaccepted。MeanwhileKatharineandRodneydrewfurtherahead,andDenhamkept,ifthatistherightexpressionforaninvoluntaryaction,onefilamentofhisminduponthem,whilewiththerestofhisintelligencehesoughttounderstandwhatSandyswassaying。
  Astheypassedthroughthecourtsthustalking,Sandyslaidthetipofhisstickupononeofthestonesformingatime-wornarch,andstruckitmeditativelytwoorthreetimesinordertoillustratesomethingveryobscureaboutthecomplexnatureofone'sapprehensionoffacts。
  Duringthepausewhichthisnecessitated,KatharineandRodneyturnedthecorneranddisappeared。ForamomentDenhamstoppedinvoluntarilyinhissentence,andcontinueditwithasenseofhavinglostsomething。
  Unconsciousthattheywereobserved,KatharineandRodneyhadcomeoutontheEmbankment。Whentheyhadcrossedtheroad,Rodneyslappedhishanduponthestoneparapetabovetheriverandexclaimed:
  “IpromiseIwon'tsayanotherwordaboutit,Katharine!Butdostopaminuteandlookatthemoonuponthewater。“
  Katharinepaused,lookedupanddowntheriver,andsnuffedtheair。
  “I'msureonecansmellthesea,withthewindblowingthisway,“shesaid。
  Theystoodsilentforafewmomentswhiletherivershiftedinitsbed,andthesilverandredlightswhichwerelaiduponitweretornbythecurrentandjoinedtogetheragain。Veryfaroffuptheriverasteamerhootedwithitshollowvoiceofunspeakablemelancholy,asiffromtheheartoflonelymist-shroudedvoyagings。
  “Ah!“Rodneycried,strikinghishandoncemoreuponthebalustrade,“whycan'tonesayhowbeautifulitallis?WhyamIcondemnedforever,Katharine,tofeelwhatIcan'texpress?AndthethingsIcangivethere'snouseinmygiving。Trustme,Katharine,“headdedhastily,“Iwon'tspeakofitagain。Butinthepresenceofbeauty——
  lookattheiridescenceroundthemoon!——onefeels——onefeels——Perhapsifyoumarriedme——I'mhalfapoet,yousee,andIcan'tpretendnottofeelwhatIdofeel。IfIcouldwrite——ah,thatwouldbeanothermatter。Ishouldn'tbotheryoutomarrymethen,Katharine。“
  Hespokethesedisconnectedsentencesratherabruptly,withhiseyesalternatelyuponthemoonanduponthestream。
  “ButformeIsupposeyouwouldrecommendmarriage?“saidKatharine,withhereyesfixedonthemoon。
  “CertainlyIshould。Notforyouonly,butforallwomen。Why,you'renothingatallwithoutit;you'reonlyhalfalive;usingonlyhalfyourfaculties;youmustfeelthatforyourself。Thatiswhy——“Herehestoppedhimself,andtheybegantowalkslowlyalongtheEmbankment,themoonfrontingthem。
  “Withhowsadstepssheclimbsthesky,Howsilentlyandwithhowwanaface,“
  Rodneyquoted。
  “I'vebeentoldagreatmanyunpleasantthingsaboutmyselfto-night,“
  Katharinestated,withoutattendingtohim。“Mr。Denhamseemstothinkithismissiontolectureme,thoughIhardlyknowhim。Bytheway,William,youknowhim;tellme,whatishelike?“
  Williamdrewadeepsigh。
  “Wemaylectureyoutillwe'reblueintheface——“
  “Yes——butwhat'shelike?“
  “Andwewritesonnetstoyoureyebrows,youcruelpracticalcreature。
  Denham?“headded,asKatharineremainedsilent。“Agoodfellow,I
  shouldthink。Hecares,naturally,fortherightsortofthings,I
  expect。Butyoumustn'tmarryhim,though。Hescoldedyou,didhe——
  whatdidhesay?“
  “WhathappenswithMr。Denhamisthis:Hecomestotea。IdoallIcantoputhimathisease。Hemerelysitsandscowlsatme。ThenIshowhimourmanuscripts。Atthishebecomesreallyangry,andtellsmeI'venobusinesstocallmyselfamiddle-classwoman。Sowepartinahuff;andnexttimewemeet,whichwasto-night,hewalksstraightuptome,andsays,'GototheDevil!'That'sthesortofbehaviormymothercomplainsof。Iwanttoknow,whatdoesitmean?“
  Shepausedand,slackeninghersteps,lookedatthelightedtraindrawingitselfsmoothlyoverHungerfordBridge。
  “Itmeans,Ishouldsay,thathefindsyouchillyandunsympathetic。“
  Katharinelaughedwithround,separatenotesofgenuineamusement。
  “It'stimeIjumpedintoacabandhidmyselfinmyownhouse,“sheexclaimed。
  “Wouldyourmotherobjecttomybeingseenwithyou?Noonecouldpossiblyrecognizeus,couldthey?“Rodneyinquired,withsomesolicitude。
  Katharinelookedathim,andperceivingthathissolicitudewasgenuine,shelaughedagain,butwithanironicalnoteinherlaughter。
  “Youmaylaugh,Katharine,butIcantellyouthatifanyofyourfriendssawustogetheratthistimeofnighttheywouldtalkaboutit,andIshouldfindthatverydisagreeable。Butwhydoyoulaugh?“
  “Idon'tknow。Becauseyou'resuchaqueermixture,Ithink。You'rehalfpoetandhalfoldmaid。“
  “IknowIalwaysseemtoyouhighlyridiculous。ButIcan'thelphavinginheritedcertaintraditionsandtryingtoputthemintopractice。“
  “Nonsense,William。YoumaycomeoftheoldestfamilyinDevonshire,butthat'snoreasonwhyyoushouldmindbeingseenalonewithmeontheEmbankment。“
  “I'mtenyearsolderthanyouare,Katharine,andIknowmoreoftheworldthanyoudo。“
  “Verywell。Leavemeandgohome。“
  Rodneylookedbackoverhisshoulderandperceivedthattheywerebeingfollowedatashortdistancebyataxicab,whichevidentlyawaitedhissummons。Katharinesawit,too,andexclaimed:
  “Don'tcallthatcabforme,William。Ishallwalk。“
  “Nonsense,Katharine;you'lldonothingofthekind。It'snearlytwelveo'clock,andwe'vewalkedtoofarasitis。“
  KatharinelaughedandwalkedonsoquicklythatbothRodneyandthetaxicabhadtoincreasetheirpacetokeepupwithher。
  “Now,William,“shesaid,“ifpeopleseemeracingalongtheEmbankmentlikethistheyWILLtalk。Youhadfarbettersaygood-night,ifyoudon'twantpeopletotalk。“
  AtthisWilliambeckoned,withadespoticgesture,tothecabwithonehand,andwiththeotherhebroughtKatharinetoastandstill。
  “Don'tletthemanseeusstruggling,forGod'ssake!“hemurmured。
  Katharinestoodforamomentquitestill。
  “There'smoreoftheoldmaidinyouthanthepoet,“sheobservedbriefly。
  Williamshutthedoorsharply,gavetheaddresstothedriver,andturnedaway,liftinghishatpunctiliouslyhighinfarewelltotheinvisiblelady。
  Helookedbackafterthecabtwice,suspiciously,halfexpectingthatshewouldstopitanddismount;butitboreherswiftlyon,andwassoonoutofsight。Williamfeltinthemoodforashortsoliloquyofindignation,forKatharinehadcontrivedtoexasperatehiminmorewaysthanone。
  “Ofalltheunreasonable,inconsideratecreaturesI'veeverknown,she'stheworst!“heexclaimedtohimself,stridingbackalongtheEmbankment。“HeavenforbidthatIshouldevermakeafoolofmyselfwithheragain。Why,I'dsoonermarrythedaughterofmylandladythanKatharineHilbery!She'dleavemenotamoment'speace——andshe'dneverunderstandme——never,never,never!“
  UtteredaloudandwithvehemencesothatthestarsofHeavenmighthear,fortherewasnohumanbeingathand,thesesentimentssoundedsatisfactorilyirrefutable。Rodneyquieteddown,andwalkedoninsilence,untilheperceivedsomeoneapproachinghim,whohadsomething,eitherinhiswalkorhisdress,whichproclaimedthathewasoneofWilliam'sacquaintancesbeforeitwaspossibletotellwhichofthemhewas。ItwasDenhamwho,havingpartedfromSandysatthebottomofhisstaircase,wasnowwalkingtotheTubeatCharingCross,deepinthethoughtswhichhistalkwithSandyshadsuggested。
  HehadforgottenthemeetingatMaryDatchet'srooms,hehadforgottenRodney,andmetaphorsandElizabethandrama,andcouldhaveswornthathehadforgottenKatharineHilbery,too,althoughthatwasmoredisputable。Hismindwasscalingthehighestpinnaclesofitsalps,wheretherewasonlystarlightandtheuntroddensnow。HecaststrangeeyesuponRodney,astheyencounteredeachotherbeneathalamp-post。
  “Ha!“Rodneyexclaimed。
  Ifhehadbeeninfullpossessionofhismind,Denhamwouldprobablyhavepassedonwithasalutation。Buttheshockoftheinterruptionmadehimstandstill,andbeforeheknewwhathewasdoing,hehadturnedandwaswalkingwithRodneyinobediencetoRodney'sinvitationtocometohisroomsandhavesomethingtodrink。DenhamhadnowishtodrinkwithRodney,buthefollowedhimpassivelyenough。Rodneywasgratifiedbythisobedience。Hefeltinclinedtobecommunicativewiththissilentman,whopossessedsoobviouslyallthegoodmasculinequalitiesinwhichKatharinenowseemedlamentablydeficient。
  “Youdowell,Denham,“hebeganimpulsively,“tohavenothingtodowithyoungwomen。Iofferyoumyexperience——ifonetruststhemoneinvariablyhascausetorepent。NotthatIhaveanyreasonatthismoment,“headdedhastily,“tocomplainofthem。It'sasubjectthatcropsupnowandagainfornoparticularreason。MissDatchet,Idaresay,isoneoftheexceptions。DoyoulikeMissDatchet?“
  TheseremarksindicatedclearlyenoughthatRodney'snerveswereinastateofirritation,andDenhamspeedilywoketothesituationoftheworldasithadbeenonehourago。HehadlastseenRodneywalkingwithKatharine。Hecouldnothelpregrettingtheeagernesswithwhichhismindreturnedtotheseinterests,andfrettedhimwiththeoldtrivialanxieties。Hesankinhisownesteem。ReasonbadehimbreakfromRodney,whoclearlytendedtobecomeconfidential,beforehehadutterlylosttouchwiththeproblemsofhighphilosophy。Helookedalongtheroad,andmarkedalamp-postatadistanceofsomehundredyards,anddecidedthathewouldpartfromRodneywhentheyreachedthispoint。
  “Yes,IlikeMary;Idon'tseehowonecouldhelplikingher,“heremarkedcautiously,withhiseyeonthelamp-post。
  “Ah,Denham,you'resodifferentfromme。Younevergiveyourselfaway。IwatchedyouthiseveningwithKatharineHilbery。MyinstinctistotrustthepersonI'mtalkingto。That'swhyI'malwaysbeingtakenin,Isuppose。“
  DenhamseemedtobeponderingthisstatementofRodney's,but,asamatteroffact,hewashardlyconsciousofRodneyandhisrevelations,andwasonlyconcernedtomakehimmentionKatharineagainbeforetheyreachedthelamp-post。
  “Who'stakenyouinnow?“heasked。“KatharineHilbery?“
  Rodneystoppedandoncemorebeganbeatingakindofrhythm,asifheweremarkingaphraseinasymphony,uponthesmoothstonebalustradeoftheEmbankment。
  “KatharineHilbery,“herepeated,withacuriouslittlechuckle。“No,Denham,Ihavenoillusionsaboutthatyoungwoman。IthinkImadethatplaintoherto-night。Butdon'trunawaywithafalseimpression,“hecontinuedeagerly,turningandlinkinghisarmthroughDenham's,asthoughtopreventhimfromescaping;and,thuscompelled,Denhampassedthemonitorylamp-post,towhich,inpassing,hebreathedanexcuse,forhowcouldhebreakawaywhenRodney'sarmwasactuallylinkedinhis?“YoumustnotthinkthatIhaveanybitternessagainsther——farfromit。It'snotaltogetherherfault,poorgirl。
  Shelives,youknow,oneofthoseodious,self-centeredlives——atleast,Ithinkthemodiousforawoman——feedingherwitsuponeverything,havingcontrolofeverything,gettingfartoomuchherownwayathome——spoilt,inasense,feelingthateveryoneisatherfeet,andsonotrealizinghowshehurts——thatis,howrudelyshebehavestopeoplewhohaven'tallheradvantages。Still,todoherjustice,she'snofool,“headded,asiftowarnDenhamnottotakeanyliberties。“Shehastaste。Shehassense。Shecanunderstandyouwhenyoutalktoher。Butshe'sawoman,andthere'sanendofit,“headded,withanotherlittlechuckle,anddroppedDenham'sarm。
  “Anddidyoutellherallthisto-night?“Denhamasked。
  “Ohdearme,no。IshouldneverthinkoftellingKatharinethetruthaboutherself。Thatwouldn'tdoatall。OnehastobeinanattitudeofadorationinordertogetonwithKatharine。
  “NowI'velearntthatshe'srefusedtomarryhimwhydon'tIgohome?“
  Denhamthoughttohimself。ButhewentonwalkingbesideRodney,andforatimetheydidnotspeak,thoughRodneyhummedsnatchesofatuneoutofanoperabyMozart。Afeelingofcontemptandlikingcombineverynaturallyinthemindofonetowhomanotherhasjustspokenunpremeditatedly,revealingrathermoreofhisprivatefeelingsthanheintendedtoreveal。DenhambegantowonderwhatsortofpersonRodneywas,andatthesametimeRodneybegantothinkaboutDenham。
  “You'reaslavelikeme,Isuppose?“heasked。
  “Asolicitor,yes。“
  “Isometimeswonderwhywedon'tchuckit。Whydon'tyouemigrate,Denham?Ishouldhavethoughtthatwouldsuityou。“
  “I'veafamily。“
  “I'moftenonthepointofgoingmyself。AndthenIknowIcouldn'tlivewithoutthis“——andhewavedhishandtowardstheCityofLondon,whichwore,atthismoment,theappearanceofatowncutoutofgray-
  bluecardboard,andpastedflatagainstthesky,whichwasofadeeperblue。
  “ThereareoneortwopeopleI'mfondof,andthere'salittlegoodmusic,andafewpictures,nowandthen——justenoughtokeeponedanglingabouthere。Ah,butIcouldn'tlivewithsavages!Areyoufondofbooks?Music?Pictures?D'youcareatallforfirsteditions?
  I'vegotafewnicethingsuphere,thingsIpickupcheap,forI
  can'taffordtogivewhattheyask。“
  Theyhadreachedasmallcourtofhigheighteenth-centuryhouses,inoneofwhichRodneyhadhisrooms。Theyclimbedaverysteepstaircase,throughwhoseuncurtainedwindowsthemoonlightfell,illuminatingthebanisterswiththeirtwistedpillars,andthepilesofplatessetonthewindow-sills,andjarshalf-fullofmilk。
  Rodney'sroomsweresmall,butthesitting-roomwindowlookedoutintoacourtyard,withitsflaggedpavement,anditssingletree,andacrosstotheflatred-brickfrontsoftheoppositehouses,whichwouldnothavesurprisedDr。Johnson,ifhehadcomeoutofhisgraveforaturninthemoonlight。Rodneylithislamp,pulledhiscurtains,offeredDenhamachair,and,flingingthemanuscriptofhispaperontheElizabethanuseofMetaphorontothetable,exclaimed:
  “Ohdearme,whatawasteoftime!Butit'sovernow,andsowemaythinknomoreaboutit。“
  Hethenbusiedhimselfverydexterouslyinlightingafire,producingglasses,whisky,acake,andcupsandsaucers。Heputonafadedcrimsondressing-gown,andapairofredslippers,andadvancedtoDenhamwithatumblerinonehandandawell-burnishedbookintheother。
  “TheBaskervilleCongreve,“saidRodney,offeringittohisguest。“I
  couldn'treadhiminacheapedition。“
  Whenhewasseenthusamonghisbooksandhisvaluables,amiablyanxioustomakehisvisitorcomfortable,andmovingaboutwithsomethingofthedexterityandgraceofaPersiancat,Denhamrelaxedhiscriticalattitude,andfeltmoreathomewithRodneythanhewouldhavedonewithmanymenbetterknowntohim。Rodney'sroomwastheroomofapersonwhocherishesagreatmanypersonaltastes,guardingthemfromtheroughblastsofthepublicwithscrupulousattention。
  Hispapersandhisbooksroseinjaggedmoundsontableandfloor,roundwhichheskirtedwithnervouscarelesthisdressing-gownmightdisarrangethemeversoslightly。Onachairstoodastackofphotographsofstatuesandpictures,whichitwashishabittoexhibit,onebyone,forthespaceofadayortwo。Thebooksonhisshelveswereasorderlyasregimentsofsoldiers,andthebacksofthemshonelikesomanybronzebeetle-wings;though,ifyoutookonefromitsplaceyousawashabbiervolumebehindit,sincespacewaslimited。AnovalVenetianmirrorstoodabovethefireplace,andreflectedduskilyinitsspotteddepthsthefaintyellowandcrimsonofajarfuloftulipswhichstoodamongthelettersandpipesandcigarettesuponthemantelpiece。Asmallpianooccupiedacorneroftheroom,withthescoreof“DonGiovanni“openuponthebracket。
  “Well,Rodney,“saidDenham,ashefilledhispipeandlookedabouthim,“thisisallveryniceandcomfortable。“
  Rodneyturnedhisheadhalfroundandsmiled,withtheprideofaproprietor,andthenpreventedhimselffromsmiling。
  “Tolerable,“hemuttered。
  “ButIdaresayit'sjustaswellthatyouhavetoearnyourownliving。“
  “IfyoumeanthatIshouldn'tdoanythinggoodwithleisureifIhadit,Idaresayyou'reright。ButIshouldbetentimesashappywithmywholedaytospendasIliked。“
  “Idoubtthat,“Denhamreplied。
  Theysatsilent,andthesmokefromtheirpipesjoinedamicablyinabluevaporabovetheirheads。
  “IcouldspendthreehourseverydayreadingShakespeare,“Rodneyremarked。“Andthere'smusicandpictures,letalonethesocietyofthepeopleonelikes。“
  “You'dbeboredtodeathinayear'stime。“
  “Oh,IgrantyouIshouldbeboredifIdidnothing。ButIshouldwriteplays。“
  “H'm!“
  “Ishouldwriteplays,“herepeated。“I'vewrittenthree-quartersofonealready,andI'monlywaitingforaholidaytofinishit。Andit'snotbad——no,someofit'sreallyrathernice。“
  ThequestionaroseinDenham'smindwhetherheshouldasktoseethisplay,as,nodoubt,hewasexpectedtodo。HelookedratherstealthilyatRodney,whowastappingthecoalnervouslywithapoker,andquiveringalmostphysically,soDenhamthought,withdesiretotalkaboutthisplayofhis,andvanityunrequitedandurgent。HeseemedverymuchatDenham'smercy,andDenhamcouldnothelplikinghim,partlyonthataccount。
  “Well,……willyouletmeseetheplay?“Denhamasked,andRodneylookedimmediatelyappeased,but,nevertheless,hesatsilentforamoment,holdingthepokerperfectlyuprightintheair,regardingitwithhisratherprominenteyes,andopeninghislipsandshuttingthemagain。
  “Doyoureallycareforthiskindofthing?“heaskedatlength,inadifferenttoneofvoicefromthatinwhichhehadbeenspeaking。And,withoutwaitingforananswer,hewenton,ratherquerulously:“Veryfewpeoplecareforpoetry。Idaresayitboresyou。“
  “Perhaps,“Denhamremarked。
  “Well,I'lllendityou,“Rodneyannounced,puttingdownthepoker。
  Ashemovedtofetchtheplay,Denhamstretchedahandtothebookcasebesidehim,andtookdownthefirstvolumewhichhisfingerstouched。
  IthappenedtobeasmallandverylovelyeditionofSirThomasBrowne,containingthe“UrnBurial,“the“Hydriotaphia,“andthe“GardenofCyrus,“and,openingitatapassagewhichheknewverynearlybyheart,Denhambegantoreadand,forsometime,continuedtoread。
  Rodneyresumedhisseat,withhismanuscriptonhisknee,andfromtimetotimeheglancedatDenham,andthenjoinedhisfinger-tipsandcrossedhisthinlegsoverthefender,asifheexperiencedagooddealofpleasure。AtlengthDenhamshutthebook,andstood,withhisbacktothefireplace,occasionallymakinganinarticulatehummingsoundwhichseemedtorefertoSirThomasBrowne。Heputhishatonhishead,andstoodoverRodney,whostilllaystretchedbackinhischair,withhistoeswithinthefender。
  “Ishalllookinagainsometime,“Denhamremarked,uponwhichRodneyhelduphishand,containinghismanuscript,withoutsayinganythingexcept——“Ifyoulike。“
  Denhamtookthemanuscriptandwent。Twodayslaterhewasmuchsurprisedtofindathinparcelonhisbreakfastplate,which,onbeingopened,revealedtheverycopyofSirThomasBrownewhichhehadstudiedsointentlyinRodney'srooms。Fromsheerlazinesshereturnednothanks,buthethoughtofRodneyfromtimetotimewithinterest,disconnectinghimfromKatharine,andmeanttogoroundoneeveningandsmokeapipewithhim。ItpleasedRodneythustogiveawaywhateverhisfriendsgenuinelyadmired。Hislibrarywasconstantlybeingdiminished。
  CHAPTERVI
  Ofallthehoursofanordinaryworkingweek-day,whicharethepleasantesttolookforwardtoandtolookbackupon?Ifasingleinstanceisofuseinframingatheory,itmaybesaidthattheminutesbetweennine-twenty-fiveandnine-thirtyinthemorninghadasingularcharmforMaryDatchet。Shespenttheminaveryenviableframeofmind;hercontentmentwasalmostunalloyed。Highintheairasherflatwas,somebeamsfromthemorningsunreachedhereveninNovember,strikingstraightatcurtain,chair,andcarpet,andpaintingtherethreebright,truespacesofgreen,blue,andpurple,uponwhichtheeyerestedwithapleasurewhichgavephysicalwarmthtothebody。
  TherewerefewmorningswhenMarydidnotlookup,asshebenttolaceherboots,andasshefollowedtheyellowrodfromcurtaintobreakfast-tablesheusuallybreathedsomesighofthankfulnessthatherlifeprovidedherwithsuchmomentsofpureenjoyment。Shewasrobbingnooneofanything,andyet,togetsomuchpleasurefromsimplethings,suchaseatingone'sbreakfastaloneinaroomwhichhadnicecolorsinit,cleanfromtheskirtingoftheboardstothecornersoftheceiling,seemedtosuithersothoroughlythatsheusedatfirsttohuntaboutforsomeonetoapologizeto,orforsomeflawinthesituation。ShehadnowbeensixmonthsinLondon,andshecouldfindnoflaw,butthat,assheinvariablyconcludedbythetimeherbootswerelaced,wassolelyandentirelyduetothefactthatshehadherwork。Everyday,asshestoodwithherdispatch-boxinherhandatthedoorofherflat,andgaveonelookbackintotheroomtoseethateverythingwasstraightbeforesheleft,shesaidtoherselfthatshewasverygladthatshewasgoingtoleaveitall,thattohavesattherealldaylong,intheenjoymentofleisure,wouldhavebeenintolerable。
  Outinthestreetshelikedtothinkherselfoneoftheworkerswho,atthishour,taketheirwayinrapidsinglefilealongallthebroadpavementsofthecity,withtheirheadsslightlylowered,asifalltheireffortweretofolloweachotherascloselyasmightbe;sothatMaryusedtofiguretoherselfastraightrabbit-runwornbytheirunswervingfeetuponthepavement。Butshelikedtopretendthatshewasindistinguishablefromtherest,andthatwhenawetdaydrovehertotheUndergroundoromnibus,shegaveandtookhershareofcrowdandwetwithclerksandtypistsandcommercialmen,andsharedwiththemtheseriousbusinessofwinding-uptheworldtotickforanotherfour-and-twentyhours。
  Thusthinking,ontheparticularmorninginquestion,shemadeherawayacrossLincoln'sInnFieldsandupKingsway,andsothroughSouthamptonRowuntilshereachedherofficeinRussellSquare。Nowandthenshewouldpauseandlookintothewindowofsomebooksellerorflowershop,where,atthisearlyhour,thegoodswerebeingarranged,andemptygapsbehindtheplateglassrevealedastateofundress。Maryfeltkindlydisposedtowardstheshopkeepers,andhopedthattheywouldtrickthemiddaypublicintopurchasing,foratthishourofthemorningsherangedherselfentirelyonthesideoftheshopkeepersandbankclerks,andregardedallwhosleptlateandhadmoneytospendasherenemyandnaturalprey。AnddirectlyshehadcrossedtheroadatHolborn,herthoughtsallcamenaturallyandregularlytoroostuponherwork,andsheforgotthatshewas,properlyspeaking,anamateurworker,whoseserviceswereunpaid,andcouldhardlybesaidtowindtheworldupforitsdailytask,sincetheworld,sofar,hadshownverylittledesiretotaketheboonswhichMary'ssocietyforwoman'ssuffragehadofferedit。
  ShewasthinkingallthewayupSouthamptonRowofnotepaperandfoolscap,andhowaneconomyintheuseofpapermightbeeffectedwithout,ofcourse,hurtingMrs。Seal'sfeelings,forshewascertainthatthegreatorganizersalwayspounce,tobeginwith,upontrifleslikethese,andbuilduptheirtriumphantreformsuponabasisofabsolutesolidity;and,withoutacknowledgingitforamoment,MaryDatchetwasdeterminedtobeagreatorganizer,andhadalreadydoomedhersocietytoreconstructionofthemostradicalkind。Onceortwicelately,itistrue,shehadstarted,broadawake,beforeturningintoRussellSquare,anddenouncedherselfrathersharplyforbeingalreadyinagroove,capable,thatis,ofthinkingthesamethoughtseverymorningatthesamehour,sothatthechestnut-coloredbrickoftheRussellSquarehouseshadsomecuriousconnectionwithherthoughtsaboutofficeeconomy,andservedalsoasasignthatsheshouldgetintotrimformeetingMr。Clacton,orMrs。Seal,orwhoevermightbebeforehandwithherattheoffice。Havingnoreligiousbelief,shewasthemoreconscientiousaboutherlife,examiningherpositionfromtimetotimeveryseriously,andnothingannoyedhermorethantofindoneofthesebadhabitsnibblingawayunheededattheprecioussubstance。Whatwasthegood,afterall,ofbeingawomanifonedidn'tkeepfresh,andcramone'slifewithallsortsofviewsandexperiments?Thusshealwaysgaveherselfalittleshake,assheturnedthecorner,and,asoftenasnot,reachedherowndoorwhistlingasnatchofaSomersetshireballad。
  ThesuffrageofficewasatthetopofoneofthelargeRussellSquarehouses,whichhadoncebeenlivedinbyagreatcitymerchantandhisfamily,andwasnowletoutinslicestoanumberofsocietieswhichdisplayedassortedinitialsupondoorsofgroundglass,andkept,eachofthem,atypewriterwhichclickedbusilyalldaylong。Theoldhouse,withitsgreatstonestaircase,echoedhollowlytothesoundoftypewritersandoferrand-boysfromtentosix。Thenoiseofdifferenttypewritersalreadyatwork,disseminatingtheirviewsupontheprotectionofnativeraces,orthevalueofcerealsasfoodstuffs,quickenedMary'ssteps,andshealwaysranupthelastflightofstepswhichledtoherownlanding,atwhateverhourshecame,soastogethertypewritertotakeitsplaceincompetitionwiththerest。
  Shesatherselfdowntoherletters,andverysoonallthesespeculationswereforgotten,andthetwolinesdrewthemselvesbetweenhereyebrows,asthecontentsoftheletters,theofficefurniture,andthesoundsofactivityinthenextroomgraduallyassertedtheirswayuponher。Byeleveno'clocktheatmosphereofconcentrationwasrunningsostronglyinonedirectionthatanythoughtofadifferentordercouldhardlyhavesurviveditsbirthmorethanamomentorso。
  Thetaskwhichlaybeforeherwastoorganizeaseriesofentertainments,theprofitsofwhichweretobenefitthesociety,whichdroopedforwantoffunds。Itwasherfirstattemptatorganizationonalargescale,andshemeanttoachievesomethingremarkable。Shemeanttousethecumbrousmachinetopickoutthis,that,andtheotherinterestingpersonfromthemuddleoftheworld,andtosetthemforaweekinapatternwhichmustcatchtheeyesofCabinetMinisters,andtheeyesoncecaught,theoldargumentsweretobedeliveredwithunexampledoriginality。Suchwastheschemeasawhole;andincontemplationofitshewouldbecomequiteflushedandexcited,andhavetoremindherselfofallthedetailsthatintervenedbetweenherandsuccess。
  Thedoorwouldopen,andMr。Clactonwouldcomeintosearchforacertainleafletburiedbeneathapyramidofleaflets。Hewasathin,sandy-hairedmanofaboutthirty-five,spokewithaCockneyaccent,andhadabouthimafrugallook,asifnaturehadnotdealtgenerouslywithhiminanyway,which,naturally,preventedhimfromdealinggenerouslywithotherpeople。Whenhehadfoundhisleaflet,andofferedafewjocularhintsuponkeepingpapersinorder,thetypewritingwouldstopabruptly,andMrs。Sealwouldburstintotheroomwithaletterwhichneededexplanationinherhand。Thiswasamoreseriousinterruptionthantheother,becausesheneverknewexactlywhatshewanted,andhalfadozenrequestswouldboltfromher,nooneofwhichwasclearlystated。Dressedinplum-coloredvelveteen,withshort,grayhair,andafacethatseemedpermanentlyflushedwithphilanthropicenthusiasm,shewasalwaysinahurry,andalwaysinsomedisorder。Sheworetwocrucifixes,whichgotthemselvesentangledinaheavygoldchainuponherbreast,andseemedtoMaryexpressiveofhermentalambiguity。OnlyhervastenthusiasmandherworshipofMissMarkham,oneofthepioneersofthesociety,keptherinherplace,forwhichshehadnosoundqualification。
  Sothemorningworeon,andthepileoflettersgrew,andMaryfelt,atlast,thatshewasthecenterganglionofaveryfinenetworkofnerveswhichfelloverEngland,andoneofthesedays,whenshetouchedtheheartofthesystem,wouldbeginfeelingandrushingtogetherandemittingtheirsplendidblazeofrevolutionaryfireworks——forsomesuchmetaphorrepresentswhatshefeltaboutherwork,whenherbrainhadbeenheatedbythreehoursofapplication。
  Shortlybeforeoneo'clockMr。ClactonandMrs。Sealdesistedfromtheirlabors,andtheoldjokeaboutluncheon,whichcameoutregularlyatthishour,wasrepeatedwithscarcelyanyvariationofwords。Mr。Clactonpatronizedavegetarianrestaurant;Mrs。Sealbroughtsandwiches,whichsheatebeneaththeplane-treesinRussellSquare;whileMarygenerallywenttoagaudyestablishment,upholsteredinredplush,nearby,where,muchtothevegetarian'sdisapproval,youcouldbuysteak,twoinchesthick,oraroastsectionoffowl,swimminginapewterdish。