IknownotwhetherornoIshallbringitabout。Icouldwishthat,insteadofsomeothermemberofhissuccession,myfatherhadresignedtomethepassionateaffectionhehadinhisoldagetohishouseholdaffairs;hewashappyinthathecouldaccommodatehisdesirestohisfortune,andsatisfyhimselfwithwhathehad;politicalphilosophymaytomuchpurposecondemnthemeannessandsterilityofmyemployment,ifI
canoncecometorelishit,ashedid。Iamofopinionthatthemosthonourablecallingistoservethepublic,andtobeusefultomany,"Fructusenimingeniietvirtutis,omnisquepraestantiae,tummaximuscapitur,quuminproximumquemqueconfertur:"
["Forthegreatestenjoymentofevilandvirtue,andofallexcellence,isexperiencedwhentheyareconferredonsomeonenearest。"——Cicero,DeAmicil。,c。]
formyself,Idisclaimit;partlyoutofconscience(forwhereIseetheweightthatliesuponsuchemployments,IperceivealsothelittlemeansIhavetosupplyit;andPlato,amasterinallpoliticalgovernmenthimself,neverthelesstookcaretoabstainfromit),andpartlyoutofcowardice。Icontentmyselfwithenjoyingtheworldwithoutbustle;
only—toliveanexcusablelife,andsuchasmayneitherbeaburdentomyselfnortoanyother。
NeverdidanymanmorefullyandfeeblysufferhimselftobegovernedbyathirdpersonthanIshoulddo,hadIanyonetowhomtoentrustmyself。
Oneofmywishesatthistimeshouldbe,tohaveason—in—lawthatknewhandsomelyhowtocherishmyoldage,andtorockitasleep;intowhosehandsImightdeposit,infullsovereignty,themanagementanduseofallmygoods,thathemightdisposeofthemasIdo,andgetbythemwhatI
get,providedthatheonhispartweretrulyacknowledging,andafriend。
Butweliveinaworldwhereloyaltyofone’sownchildrenisunknown。
Hewhohasthechargeofmypurseinhistravels,hasitpurelyandwithoutcontrol;hecouldcheatmethoroughly,ifhecametoreckoning;
and,ifheisnotadevil,Iobligehimtodealfaithfullywithmebysoentireatrust:
"Multifalleredocuerunt,dumtimentfalli;
etaliisjuspeccandisuspicandofecerunt。"
["Manyhavetaughtotherstodeceive,whiletheyfeartobedeceived,and,bysuspectingthem,havegiventhematitletodoill。"——Seneca,Epist。,3。]
ThemostcommonsecurityItakeofmypeopleisignorance;IneverpresumeanytobevicioustillIhavefirstfoundthemso;andreposethemostconfidenceintheyoungersort,thatIthinkareleastspoiledbyillexample。Ihadratherbetoldattwomonths’endthatIhavespentfourhundredcrowns,thantohavemyearsbatteredeverynightwiththree,five,seven:andIhavebeen,inthisway,aslittlerobbedasanother。Itistrue,Iamwillingenoughnottoseeit;I,insomesort,purposely,harbourakindofperplexed,uncertainknowledgeofmymoney:
uptoacertainpoint,Iamcontenttodoubt。Onemustleavealittleroomfortheinfidelityorindiscretionofaservant;ifyouhaveleftenough,ingross,todoyourbusiness,lettheoverplusofFortune’sliberalityrunalittlemorefreelyathermercy;’tisthegleaner’sportion。Afterall,IdonotsomuchvaluethefidelityofmypeopleasIcontemntheirinjury。Whatameanandridiculousthingitisforamantostudyhismoney,todelightinhandlingandtellingitoverandoveragain!’Tisbythisavaricemakesitsapproaches。
IneighteenyearsthatIhavehadmyestateinmy,ownhands,Icouldneverprevailwithmyselfeithertoreadovermydeedsorexaminemyprincipalaffairs,whichought,ofnecessity,topassundermyknowledgeandinspection。’Tisnotaphilosophicaldisdainofworldlyandtransitorythings;mytasteisnotpurifiedtothatdegree,andIvaluethematasgreatarate,atleast,astheyareworth;but’tis,intruth,aninexcusableandchildishlazinessandnegligence。WhatwouldInotratherdothanreadacontract?orthan,asaslavetomyownbusiness,tumbleoverthosedustywritings?or,whichisworse,thoseofanotherman,assomanydonowadays,togetmoney?Igrudgenothingbutcareandtrouble,andendeavournothingsomuch,astobecarelessandatease。
Ihadbeenmuchfitter,Ibelieve,couldithavebeenwithoutobligationandservitude,tohaveliveduponanotherman’sfortunethanmyown:and,indeed,Idonotknow,whenIexamineitnearer,whether,accordingtomyhumour,whatIhavetosufferfrommyaffairsandservants,hasnotinitsomethingmoreabject,troublesome,andtormentingthantherewouldbeinservingamanbetterbornthanmyself,whowouldgovernmewithagentlerein,andalittleatmyowncase:
"Servitusobedientiaestfractianimietabjecti,arbitriocarentissuo。"
["Servitudeistheobedienceofasubduedandabjectmind,wantingitsownfreewill。"——Cicero,Paradox,V。I。]
Cratesdidworse,whothrewhimselfintothelibertyofpoverty,onlytoridhimselfoftheinconveniencesandcaresofhishouse。ThisiswhatI
wouldnotdo;Ihatepovertyequallywithpain;butIcouldbecontenttochangethekindoflifeIliveforanotherthatwashumblerandlesschargeable。
Whenabsentfromhome,Idivestmyselfofallthesethoughts,andshouldbelessconcernedfortheruinofatower,thanIam,whenpresent,atthefallofatile。Mymindiseasilycomposedatdistance,butsuffersasmuchasthatofthemeanestpeasantwhenIamathome;thereinsofmybridlebeingwronglyputon,orastrapflappingagainstmyleg,willkeepmeoutofhumouradaytogether。Iraisemycourage,wellenoughagainstinconveniences:liftupmyeyesIcannot:
"Sensus,osuperi,sensus。"
["Thesenses,Oyegods,thesenses。"]
Iamathomeresponsibleforwhatevergoesamiss。Fewmasters(Ispeakofthoseofmediumconditionsuchasmine),andiftherebeanysuch,theyaremorehappy,canrelysomuchuponanother,butthatthegreatestpartoftheburdenwilllieupontheirownshoulders。Thistakesmuchfrommygraceinentertainingvisitors,sothatIhave,peradventure,detainedsomeratheroutofexpectationofagooddinner,thanbymyownbehaviour;andlosemuchofthepleasureIoughttoreapatmyownhousefromthevisitationandassemblingofmyfriends。Themostridiculouscarriageofagentlemaninhisownhouse,istoseehimbustlingaboutthebusinessoftheplace,whisperingoneservant,andlookinganangrylookatanother:itoughtinsensiblytoslidealong,andtorepresentanordinarycurrent;andIthinkitunhandsometotalkmuchtoourguestsoftheirentertainment,whetherbywayofbraggingorexcuse。Iloveorderandcleanliness——
"EtcantharusetlanxOstenduntmihime"——
["Thedishesandtheglassesshewmemyownreflection。"
——Horace,Ep。,i。5,23]
morethanabundance;andathomehaveanexactregardtonecessity,littletooutwardshow。Ifafootmanfallstocuffsatanotherman’shouse,orstumbleandthrowadishbeforehimasheiscarryingitup,youonlylaughandmakeajeston’t;yousleepwhilstthemasterofthehouseisarrangingabilloffarewithhisstewardforyourmorrow’sentertainment。IspeakaccordingasIdomyself;quiteappreciating,nevertheless,goodhusbandryingeneral,andhowpleasantquietandprosperoushouseholdmanagement,carriedregularlyon,istosomenatures;andnotwishingtofastenmyownerrorsandinconveniencestothething;nortogivePlatothelie,wholooksuponitasthemostpleasantemploymenttoeveryonetodohisparticularaffairswithoutwrongtoanother。
WhenItravelIhavenothingtocareforbutmyself,andthelayingoutmymoney;whichisdisposedofbyonesingleprecept;toomanythingsarerequiredtotherakingittogether;inthatIunderstandnothing;inspending,Iunderstandalittle,andhowtogivesomeshowtomyexpense,whichisindeeditsprincipaluse;butIrelytooambitiouslyuponit,whichrendersitunequalanddifform,and,moreover,immoderateinboththeoneandtheotheraspect;ifitmakesashow,ifitservetheturn,Iindiscreetlyletitrun;andasindiscreetlytieupmypurse—strings,ifitdoesnotshine,anddoesnotpleaseme。Whateveritbe,whetherartornature,thatimprintsinustheconditionoflivingbyreferencetoothers,itdoesusmuchmoreharmthangood;wedepriveourselvesofourownutilities,toaccommodateappearancestothecommonopinion:
wecarenotsomuchwhatourbeingis,astousandinreality,aswhatitistothepublicobservation。Eventhepropertiesofthemind,andwisdomitself,seemfruitlesstous,ifonlyenjoyedbyourselves,andifitproducenotitselftotheviewandapprobationofothers。Thereisasortofmenwhosegoldrunsinstreamsundergroundimperceptibly;othersexposeitallinplatesandbranches;sothattotheonealiardisworthacrown,andtotheotherstheinverse:theworldesteemingitsuseandvalue,accordingtotheshow。Allover—nicesolicitudeaboutrichessmellsofavarice:eventheverydisposingofit,withatoosystematicandartificialliberality,isnotworthapainfulsuperintendenceandsolicitude:he,thatwillorderhisexpensetojustsomuch,makesittoopinchedandnarrow。Thekeepingorspendingare,ofthemselves,indifferentthings,andreceivenocolourofgoodorill,butaccordingtotheapplicationofthewill。
Theothercausethattemptsmeouttothesejourneysis,inaptitudeforthepresentmannersinourstate。Icouldeasilyconsolemyselfforthiscorruptioninregardtothepublicinterest:
"PejoraquesaeculaferriTemporibus,quorumscelerinoninvenitipsaNomen,etanulloposuitnaturametallo;"
["And,worsethantheironages,forwhosecrimesthereisnosimilitudeinanyofNature’smetals。"——Juvenal,xiii。28。]
butnottomyown。Iam,inparticular,toomuchoppressedbythem:for,inmyneighbourhood,weare,oflate,bythelonglicenceofourcivilwars,grownoldinsoriotousaformofstate,"Quippeubifasversumatquenefas,"
["Wherewrongandrighthavechangedplaces。"
——Virgil,Georg。,i。504。]
thatinearnest,’tisawonderhowitcansubsist:
"Armatiterramexercent,semperquerecentesConvectarejuvatpraedas;etvivererapto。"
["Menplough,girtwitharms;everdelightinginfreshrobberies,andlivingbyrapine。"——AEneid,vii。748。]
Infine,Iseebyourexample,thatthesocietyofmenismaintainedandheldtogether,atwhatpricesoever;inwhatconditionsoevertheyareplaced,theystillcloseandsticktogether,bothmovingandinheaps;asillunitedbodies,that,shuffledtogetherwithoutorder,findofthemselvesameanstouniteandsettle,oftenbetterthantheycouldhavebeendisposedbyart。KingPhilipmustereduparabbleofthemostwickedandincorrigiblerascalshecouldpickout,andputthemalltogetherintoacityhehadcausedtobebuiltforthatpurpose,whichboretheirname:Ibelievethatthey,evenfromvicesthemselves,erectedagovernmentamongstthem,andacommodiousandjustsociety。Isee,notoneaction,orthree,orahundred,butmanners,incommonandreceiveduse,soferocious,especiallyininhumanityandtreachery,whicharetometheworstofallvices,thatIhavenotthehearttothinkofthemwithouthorror;andalmostasmuchadmireasIdetestthem:theexerciseofthesesignalvillainiescarrieswithitasgreatsignsofvigourandforceofsoul,asoferroranddisorder。Necessityreconcilesandbringsmentogether;andthisaccidentalconnectionafterwardsformsitselfintolaws:fortherehavebeensuch,assavageasanyhumanopinioncouldconceive,who,nevertheless,havemaintainedtheirbodywithasmuchhealthandlengthoflifeasanyPlatoorAristotlecouldinvent。Andcertainly,allthesedescriptionsofpolities,feignedbyart,arefoundtoberidiculousandunfittobeputinpractice。
Thesegreatandtediousdebatesaboutthebestformofsociety,andthemostcommodiousrulestobindus,aredebatesonlyproperfortheexerciseofourwits;asintheartsthereareseveralsubjectswhichhavetheirbeinginagitationandcontroversy,andhavenolifebutthere。Suchanideaofgovernmentmightbeofsomevalueinanewworld;
butwetakeaworldalreadymade,andformedtocertaincustoms;wedonotbegetit,asPyrrhaorCadmusdid。Bywhatmeanssoeverwemayhavetheprivilegetoredressandreformitanew,wecanhardlywritheitfromitswontedbent,butweshallbreakall。SolonbeingaskedwhetherhehadestablishedthebestlawshecouldfortheAthenians;"Yes,"saidhe,"ofthosetheywouldhavereceived。"Varroexcuseshimselfafterthesamemanner:"thatifheweretobegintowriteofreligion,hewouldsaywhathebelieved;butseeingitwasalreadyreceived,hewouldwriteratheraccordingtousethannature。"
Notaccordingtoopinion,butintruthandreality,thebestandmostexcellentgovernmentforeverynationisthatunderwhichitismaintained:itsformandessentialconveniencedependuponcustom。
Weareapttobedispleasedatthepresentcondition;butI,nevertheless,maintainthattodesirecommandinafew——[anoligarchy。]——
inarepublic,oranothersortofgovernmentinmonarchythanthatalreadyestablished,isbothviceandfolly:
"Aymel’estat,telquetoleveoisestreS’ilestroyalaymelaroyaute;
S’ilestdepeu,oubierscommunaute,Aymel’aussi;carDieut’yafaictnaistre。"
["Lovethegovernment,suchasyouseeittobe。Ifitberoyal,loveroyalty;ifitisarepublicofanysort,stillloveit;forGodhimselfcreatedtheetherein。"]
SowrotethegoodMonsieurdePibrac,whomwehavelatelylost,amanofsoexcellentawit,suchsoundopinions,andsuchgentlemanners。Thisloss,andthatatthesametimewehavehadofMonsieurdeFoix,areofsogreatimportancetothecrown,thatIdonotknowwhetherthereisanothercoupleinFranceworthytosupplytheplacesofthesetwoGasconsinsincerityandwisdominthecouncilofourkings。Theywerebothvariouslygreatmen,andcertainly,accordingtotheage,rareandgreat,eachoftheminhiskind:butwhatdestinywasitthatplacedtheminthesetimes,mensoremotefromandsodisproportionedtoourcorruptionandintestinetumults?
Nothingpressessoharduponastateasinnovation:changeonlygivesformtoinjusticeandtyranny。Whenanypieceisloosened,itmaybepropertostayit;onemaytakecarethatthealterationandcorruptionnaturaltoallthingsdonotcarryustoofarfromourbeginningsandprinciples:buttoundertaketofoundsogreatamassanew,andtochangethefoundationsofsovastabuilding,isforthemtodo,whotomakeclean,efface;whoreformparticulardefectsbyanuniversalconfusion,andcurediseasesbydeath:
"Nontamcommutandarumquamevertendarumrerumcupidi。"
["Notsodesirousofchangingasofoverthrowingthings。"
——Cicero,De0ffic。,ii。i。]
Theworldisunapttobecured;andsoimpatientofanythingthatpressesit,thatitthinksofnothingbutdisengagingitselfatwhatpricesoever。Weseebyathousandexamples,thatitordinarilycuresitselftoitscost。Thedischargeofapresentevilisnocure,iftherebenotageneralamendmentofcondition。Thesurgeon’sendisnotonlytocutawaythedeadflesh;thatisbuttheprogressofhiscure;hehasacare,overandabove,tofillupthewoundwithbetterandmorenaturalflesh,andtorestorethemembertoitsduestate。Whoeveronlyproposestohimselftoremovethatwhichoffendshim,fallsshort:forgooddoesnotnecessarilysucceedevil;anotherevilmaysucceed,andaworse,asithappenedtoCaesar’smurderers,whobroughttherepublictosuchapass,thattheyhadreasontorepentthemeddlingwiththematter。Thesamehassincehappenedtoseveralothers,evendowntoourowntimes:theFrench,mycontemporaries,knowitwellenough。Allgreatmutationsshakeanddisorderastate。
Whoeverwouldlookdirectatacure,andwellconsiderofitbeforehebegan,wouldbeverywillingtowithdrawhishandsfrommeddlinginit。
PacuviusCalaviuscorrectedtheviceofthisproceedingbyanotableexample。Hisfellow—citizenswereinmutinyagainsttheirmagistrates;
hebeingamanofgreatauthorityinthecityofCapua,foundmeansonedaytoshutuptheSenatorsinthepalace;andcallingthepeopletogetherinthemarket—place,theretoldthemthatthedaywasnowcomewhereinatfulllibertytheymightrevengethemselvesonthetyrantsbywhomtheyhadbeensolongoppressed,andwhomhehadnow,allaloneandunarmed,athismercy。Hethenadvisedthattheyshouldcalltheseout,onebyone,bylot,andshouldindividuallydetermineastoeach,causingwhatevershouldbedecreedtobeimmediatelyexecuted;withthisproviso,thattheyshould,atthesametime,deputesomehonestmanintheplaceofhimwhowascondemned,totheendtheremightbenovacancyintheSenate。Theyhadnosoonerheardthenameofonesenatorbutagreatcryofuniversaldislikewasraisedupagainsthim。"Isee,"saysPacuvius,"thatwemustputhimout;heisawickedfellow;letuslookoutagoodoneinhisroom。"Immediatelytherewasaprofoundsilence,everyonebeingatastandwhomtochoose。Butone,moreimpudentthantherest,havingnamedhisman,therearoseyetagreaterconsentofvoicesagainsthim,anhundredimperfectionsbeinglaidtohischarge,andasmanyjustreasonswhyheshouldnotstand。Thesecontradictoryhumoursgrowinghot,itfaredworsewiththesecondsenatorandthethird,therebeingasmuchdisagreementintheelectionofthenew,asconsentintheputtingoutoftheold。Intheend,growingwearyofthisbustletonopurpose,theybegan,someonewayandsomeanother,tostealoutoftheassembly:
everyonecarryingbackthisresolutioninhismind,thattheoldestandbestknownevilwasevermoresupportablethanonethatwas,newanduntried。
Seeinghowmiserablyweareagitated(forwhathavewenotdone!)
"Eheu!cicatricum,etscelerispudet,Fratrumque:quidnosdurarefugimusAEtas?quidintactumnefastiLiquimus?UndemanusinventusMetuDeorumcontinuit?quibusPepercitaris。"
["Alas!ourcrimesandourfratricidesareashametous!Whatcrimedoesthisbadageshrinkfrom?Whatwickednesshaveweleftundone?Whatyouthisrestrainedfromevilbythefearofthegods?
Whataltarisspared?"——Horace,Od。,i。33,35]
Idonotpresentlyconclude,"IpsasivelitSalus,Servareprorsusnonpotesthancfamiliam;"
["IfthegoddessSalusherselfwishtosavethisfamily,sheabsolutelycannot"——Terence,Adelph。,iv。7,43。]
wearenot,peradventure,atourlastgasp。Theconservationofstatesisathingthat,inalllikelihood,surpassesourunderstanding;——acivilgovernmentis,asPlatosays,amightyandpuissantthing,andhardtobedissolved;itoftencontinuesagainstmortalandintestinediseases,againsttheinjuryofunjustlaws,againsttyranny,thecorruptionandignoranceofmagistrates,thelicenceandseditionofthepeople。Inallourfortunes,wecompareourselvestowhatisaboveus,andstilllooktowardsthosewhoarebetter:butletusmeasureourselveswithwhatisbelowus:thereisnoconditionsomiserablewhereinamanmaynotfindathousandexamplesthatwilladministerconsolation。’Tisourvicethatwemoreunwillinglylookuponwhatisabove,thanwillinglyuponwhatisbelow;andSolonwasusedtosay,that"whoeverwouldmakeaheapofalltheillstogether,thereisnoonewhowouldnotratherchoosetobearawaytheillshehasthantocometoanequaldivisionwithallothermenfromthatheap,andtakehisshare。"Ourgovernmentis,indeed,verysick,buttherehavebeenothersmoresickwithoutdying。Thegodsplayatballwithusandbandyuseveryway:
"EnimveroDiinoshominesquasipilashabent。"
ThestarsfatallydestinedthestateofRomeforanexampleofwhattheycoulddointhiskind:initarecomprisedalltheformsandadventuresthatconcernastate:allthatorderordisorder,goodorevilfortune,cando。Who,then,candespairofhiscondition,seeingtheshocksandcommotionswherewithRomewastumbledandtossed,andyetwithstoodthemall?Iftheextentofdominionbethehealthofastate(whichIbynomeansthinkitis,andIsocratespleasesmewhenheinstructsNicoclesnottoenvyprinceswhohavelargedominions,butthosewhoknowhowtopreservethosewhichhavefallenintotheirhands),thatofRomewasneversosound,aswhenitwasmostsick。Theworstofherformswasthemostfortunate;onecanhardlydiscernanyimageofgovernmentunderthefirstemperors;itisthemosthorribleandtumultuousconfusionthatcanbeimagined;itenduredit,notwithstanding,andthereincontinued,preservingnotamonarchylimitedwithinitsownbounds,butsomanynationssodiffering,soremote,sodisaffected,soconfusedlycommanded,andsounjustlyconquered:
"NecgentibusullisCommodatinpopulum,terrapelagiquepotentem,Invidiamfortunasuam。"
["Fortunenevergaveittoanynationtosatisfyitshatredagainstthepeople,mastersoftheseasandoftheearth。"——Lucan,i。32。]
Everythingthattottersdoesnotfall。Thecontextureofsogreatabodyholdsbymorenailsthanone;itholdsevenbyitsantiquity,likeoldbuildings,fromwhichthefoundationsarewornawaybytime,withoutrough—castormortar,whichyetliveandsupportthemselvesbytheirownweight:
"Necjamvalidisradicibushaerens,Ponderetutasuoest。"
Moreover,itisnotrightlytogotowork,toexamineonlytheflankandthefoss,tojudgeofthesecurityofaplace;wemustobservewhichwayapproachescanbemadetoit,andinwhatconditiontheassailantis:fewvesselssinkwiththeirownweight,andwithoutsomeexteriorviolence。
Now,letuseverywaycastoureyes;everythingaboutustotters;inallthegreatstates,bothofChristendomandelsewhere,thatareknowntous,ifyouwillbutlook,youwillthereseeevidentmenaceofalterationandruin:
"Etsuasuntillisincommoda;parqueperomnesTempestas。"
["Theyallshareinthemischief;thetempestrageseverywhere。"——AEneid,ii。]
Astrologersmayverywell,astheydo,warnusofgreatrevolutionsandimminentmutations:theirpropheciesarepresentandpalpable,theyneednotgotoheaventoforetellthis。Thereisnotonlyconsolationtobeextractedfromthisuniversalcombinationofillsandmenaces,but,moreover,somehopesofthecontinuationofourstate,forasmuchas,naturally,nothingfallswhereallfalls:universalsicknessisparticularhealth:conformityisantagonistictodissolution。Formypart,Idespairnot,andfancythatIdiscoverwaystosaveus:
"DeushaecfortassebenignaReducetinsedemvice。"
["Thedeitywillperchancebyafavourableturnrestoreustoourformerposition。"——Horace,Epod。,xiii。7。]
WhoknowsbutthatGodwillhaveithappen,asinhumanbodiesthatpurgeandrestorethemselvestoabetterstatebylongandgrievousmaladies,whichrenderthemmoreentireandperfecthealththanthattheytookfromthem?Thatwhichweighsthemostwithmeis,thatinreckoningthesymptomsofourill,Iseeasmanynaturalones,andthatHeavensendsus,andproperlyitsown,asofthosethatourdisorderandhumanimprudencecontributetoit。Theverystarsseemtodeclarethatwehavealreadycontinuedlongenough,andbeyondtheordinaryterm。Thisalsoafflictsme,thatthemischiefwhichnearestthreatensus,isnotanalterationintheentireandsolidmass,butitsdissipationanddivulsion,whichisthemostextremeofourfears。
I,moreover,fear,inthesefantasiesofmine,thetreacheryofmymemory,lest,byinadvertence,itshouldmakemewritethesamethingtwice。Ihatetoexaminemyself,andneverreview,butveryunwillingly,whathasonceescapedmypen。Iheresetdownnothingnew。Thesearecommonthoughts,andhaving,peradventure,conceivedthemanhundredtimes,IamafraidIhavesetthemdownsomewhereelsealready。
Repetitioniseverywheretroublesome,thoughitwereinHomer;but’tisruinousinthingsthathaveonlyasuperficialandtransitoryshow。Idonotloveover—insisting,eveninthemostprofitablethings,asinSeneca;andtheusageofhisstoicalschooldispleasesme,torepeat,uponeverysubject,atfulllengthandwidththeprinciplesandpresuppositionsthatserveingeneral,andalwaystorealledgeanewcommonanduniversalreasons。
Mymemorygrowscruellyworseeveryday:
"PoculaLethaeosutsiducentiasomnos,Arentefaucetraxerim;"
["AsifmydrythroathaddrunkseducingcupsofLethaeanoblivion。"——Horace,Epod。,xiv。3。]
Imustbefainforthetimetocome(forhitherto,thanksbetoGod,nothinghashappenedmuchamiss),whereasothersseektimeandopportunitytothinkofwhattheyhavetosay,toavoidallpreparation,forfearoftyingmyselftosomeobligationuponwhichImustinsist。Tobetiedandboundtoathingputsmequiteout,andtodependuponsoweakaninstrumentasmymemory。IneverreadthisfollowingstorythatIamnotoffendedatitwithapersonalandnaturalresentment:
Lyncestes,accusedofconspiracyagainstAlexander,thedaythathewasbroughtoutbeforethearmy,accordingtothecustom,tobeheardastowhathecouldsayforhimself,hadlearnedastudiedspeech,ofwhich,hesitatingandstammering,hepronouncedsomewords。Whilstgrowingmoreandmoreperplexed,whilststrugglingwithhismemory,andtryingtorecollectwhathehadtosay,thesoldiersnearesttohimchargedtheirpikesagainsthimandkilledhim,lookinguponhimasconvict;hisconfusionandsilenceservedthemforaconfession;forhavinghadsomuchleisuretopreparehimselfinprison,theyconcludedthatitwasnothismemorythatfailedhim,butthathisconsciencetieduphistongueandstoppedhismouth。And,truly,wellsaid;theplace,theassembly,theexpectation,astoundaman,evenwhenhehasbuttheambitiontospeakwell;whatcanamandowhen’tisanharangueuponwhichhislifedepends?
Formypart,theverybeingtiedtowhatIamtosayisenoughtoloosemefromit。WhenIwhollycommitandrefermyselftomymemory,Ilaysomuchstressuponitthatitsinksunderme:itgrowsdismayedwiththeburden。SomuchasItrusttoit,somuchdoIputmyselfoutofmyownpower,eventothefindingitdifficulttokeepmyowncountenance;andhavebeensometimesverymuchputtoittoconcealtheslaverywhereinI
wasengaged;whereasmydesignistomanifest,inspeaking,aperfectcalmnessbothoffaceandaccent,andcasualandunpremeditatedmotions,asrisingfrompresentoccasions,choosingrathertosaynothingtopurposethantoshowthatIcamepreparedtospeakwell,athingespeciallyunbecomingamanofmyprofession,andoftoogreatobligationonhimwhocannotretainmuch。Thepreparationbegetsagreatdealmoreexpectationthanitwillsatisfy。Amanoftenstripshimselftohisdoublettoleapnofartherthanhewouldhavedoneinhisgown:
"Nihilesthis,quiplacerevolunt,turnadversarium,quamexpectatio。"
["Nothingissoadversetothosewhomakeittheirbusinesstopleaseasexpectation"——Cicero,Acad。,ii。4]
ItisrecordedoftheoratorCurio,thatwhenheproposedthedivisionofhisorationintothreeorfourparts,orthreeorfourargumentsorreasons,itoftenhappenedeitherthatheforgotsomeone,oraddedoneortwomore。Ihavealwaysavoidedfallingintothisinconvenience,havingeverhatedthesepromisesandprescriptions,notonlyoutofdistrustofmymemory,butalsobecausethismethodrelishestoomuchoftheartist:
"Simplicioramilitaresdecent。"
["Simplicitybecomeswarriors。"——Quintilian,Instit。Orat。,xi。I。]
’Tis—enoughthatIhavepromisedtomyselfneveragaintotakeuponmetospeakinaplaceofrespect,forastospeaking,whenamanreadshisspeech,besidesthatitisveryabsurd,itisamightydisadvantagetothosewhonaturallycouldgiveitagracebyaction;andtorelyuponthemercyofmypresentinvention,Iwouldmuchlessdoit;’tisheavyandperplexed,andsuchaswouldneverfurnishmeinsuddenandimportantnecessities。
Permit,reader,thisessayitscoursealso,andthisthirdsittingtofinishtherestofmypicture:Iadd,butIcorrectnot。First,becauseIconceivethatamanhavingoncepartedwithhislabourstotheworld,hehasnofurtherrighttothem;lethimdobetterifhecan,insomenewundertaking,butnotadulteratewhathehasalreadysold。Ofsuchdealersnothingshouldbeboughttillaftertheyaredead。Letthemwellconsiderwhattheydobeforethey,produceittothelightwhohastensthem?Mybookisalwaysthesame,savingthatuponeverynewedition(thatthebuyermaynotgoawayquiteempty)Itakethelibertytoadd(as’tisbutanilljointedmarqueterie)somesupernumeraryemblem;itisbutoverweight,thatdoesnotdisfiguretheprimitiveformoftheessays,but,byalittleartfulsubtlety,givesakindofparticularvaluetoeveryoneofthosethatfollow。Thence,however,willeasilyhappensometranspositionofchronology,mystoriestakingplaceaccordingtotheiropportuneness,notalwaysaccordingtotheirage。
Secondly,becauseastowhatconcernsmyself,Ifeartolosebychange:
myunderstandingdoesnotalwaysgoforward,itgoesbackwardtoo。Idonotmuchlesssuspectmyfanciesforbeingthesecondorthethird,thanforbeingthefirst,orpresent,orpast;weoftencorrectourselvesasfoolishlyaswedoothers。Iamgrownolderbyagreatmanyyearssincemyfirstpublications,whichwereintheyear1580;butIverymuchdoubtwhetherIamgrownaninchthewiser。Inow,andIanon,aretwoseveralpersons;butwhetherbetter,Icannotdetermine。Itwereafinethingtobeold,ifweonlytravelledtowardsimprovement;but’tisadrunken,stumbling,reeling,infirmmotion:likethatofreeds,whichtheaircasuallywavestoandfroatpleasure。AntiochushadinhisyouthstronglywritteninfavouroftheAcademy;inhisoldagehewroteasmuchagainstit;wouldnot,whichofthesetwosoeverIshouldfollow,bestillAntiochus?Afterhavingestablishedtheuncertainty,togoabouttoestablishthecertaintyofhumanopinions,wasitnottoestablishdoubt,andnotcertainty,andtopromise,thathadhehadyetanotheragetolive,hewouldbealwaysupontermsofalteringhisjudgment,notsomuchforthebetter,asforsomethingelse?
ThepublicfavourhasgivenmealittlemoreconfidencethanIexpected;
butwhatI’mostfearis,lestIshouldgluttheworldwithmywritings;
Ihadrather,ofthetwo,piquemyreaderthantirehim,asalearnedmanofmytimehasdone。Praiseisalwayspleasing,letitcomefromwhom,oruponwhataccountitwill;yetoughtamantounderstandwhyheiscommended,thathemayknowhowtokeepupthesamereputationstill:
imperfectionsthemselvesmaygetcommendation。Thevulgarandcommonestimationisseldomhappyinhitting;andIammuchmistakenif,amongstthewritingsofmytime,theworstarenotthosewhichhavemostgainedthepopularapplause。Formypart,Ireturnmythankstothosegood—
naturedmenwhoarepleasedtotakemyweakendeavoursingoodpart;thefaultsoftheworkmanshiparenowheresoapparentasinamatterwhichofitselfhasnorecommendation。Blamenotme,reader,forthosethatslipinherebythefancyorinadvertencyofothers;everyhand,everyartisan,contributetheirownmaterials;Ineitherconcernmyselfwithorthography(andonlycaretohaveitaftertheoldway)norpointing,beingveryinexpertbothintheoneandtheother。Wheretheywhollybreakthesense,Iamverylittleconcerned,fortheyatleastdischargeme;butwheretheysubstituteafalseone,astheysooftendo,andwrestmetotheirconception,theyruinme。Whenthesentence,nevertheless,isnotstrongenoughformyproportion,acivilpersonoughttorejectitasspurious,andnoneofmine。WhoevershallknowhowlazyIam,andhowindulgenttomyownhumour,willeasilybelievethatIhadratherwriteasmanymoreessays,thanbetiedtorevisetheseoveragainforsochildishacorrection。
Isaidelsewhere,thatbeingplantedintheverycentreofthisnewreligion,Iamnotonlydeprivedofanygreatfamiliaritywithmenofotherkindofmannersthanmyown,andofotheropinions,bywhichtheyholdtogether,asbyatiethatsupersedesallotherobligations;butmoreoverIdonotlivewithoutdanger,amongstmentowhomallthingsareequallylawful,andofwhomthemostpartcannotoffendthelawsmorethantheyhavealreadydone;fromwhichtheextremistdegreeoflicenceproceeds。Alltheparticularbeingsummeduptogether,Idonotfindonemanofmycountry,whopayssodearforthedefenceofourlawsbothinlossanddamages(asthelawyerssay)asmyself;andsometherearewhovapourandbragoftheirzealandconstancy,thatifthingswerejustlyweighed,domuchlessthanI。Myhouse,asonethathaseverbeenopenandfreetoallcomers,andciviltoall(forIcouldneverpersuademyselftomakeitagarrisonofwar,warbeingathingthatIprefertoseeasremoteasmaybe),hassufficientlymeritedpopularkindness,andsothatitwouldbeahardmatterjustlytoinsultovermeuponmyowndunghill;andIlookuponitasawonderfulandexemplarythingthatityetcontinuesavirginfrombloodandplunderduringsolongastorm,andsomanyneighbouringrevolutionsandtumults。Fortoconfessthetruth,ithadbeenpossibleenoughforamanofmycomplexiontohaveshakenhandswithanyoneconstantandcontinuedformwhatever;butthecontraryinvasionsandincursions,alternationsandvicissitudesoffortuneroundaboutme,havehithertomoreexasperatedthancalmedandmollifiedthetemperofthecountry,andinvolvedme,overandoveragain,withinvincibledifficultiesanddangers。
Iescape,’tistrue,butamtroubledthatitismorebychance,andsomethingofmyownprudence,thanbyjustice;andamnotsatisfiedtobeoutoftheprotectionofthelaws,andunderanyothersafeguardthantheirs。Asmattersstand,Ilive,aboveonehalf,bythefavourofothers,whichisanuntowardobligation。Idonotliketoowemysafetyeithertothegenerosityoraffectionofgreatpersons,whoallowmemylegalityandmyliberty,ortotheobligingmannersofmypredecessors,ormyown:forwhatifIwereanotherkindofman?Ifmydeportment,andthefranknessofmyconversationorrelationship,obligemyneighbours,’tisthatthattheyshouldacquitthemselvesofobligationinonlypermittingmetolive,andtheymaysay,"Weallowhimthefreelibertyofhavingdivineservicereadinhisownprivatechapel,whenitisinterdictedinallchurchesroundabout,andallowhimtheuseofhisgoodsandhislife,asonewhoprotectsourwivesandcattleintimeofneed。"FormyhousehasformanydescentssharedinthereputationofLycurgustheAthenian,whowasthegeneraldepositoryandguardianofthepursesofhisfellow—citizens。NowIamclearlyofopinionthatamanshouldlivebyrightandbyauthority,andnoteitherbyrecompenseorfavour。Howmanygallantmenhaveratherchosentolosetheirlivesthantobedebtorsforthem?Ihatetosubjectmyselftoanysortofobligation,butaboveall,tothatwhichbindsmebythedutyofhonour。
Ithinknothingsodearaswhathasbeengivenme,andthisbecausemywillliesatpawnunderthetitleofgratitude,andmorewillinglyacceptofservicesthataretobesold;IfeelthatforthelastIgivenothingbutmoney,butfortheotherIgivemyself。
Theknotthatbindsmebythelawsofcourtesybindsmemorethanthatofcivilconstraint;Iammuchmoreateasewhenboundbyascrivener,thanbymyself。Isitnotreasonthatmyconscienceshouldbemuchmoreengagedwhenmensimplyrelyuponit?Inabond,myfaithowesnothing,becauseithasnothinglentit;letthemtrusttothesecuritytheyhavetakenwithoutme。Ihadmuchratherbreakthewallofaprisonandthelawsthemselvesthanmyownword。Iamnice,eventosuperstition,inkeepingmypromises,and,therefore,uponalloccasionshaveacaretomakethemuncertainandconditional。Tothoseofnogreatmoment,Iaddthejealousyofmyownrule,tomakethemweight;itwracksandoppressesmewithitsowninterest。Eveninactionswhollymyownandfree,ifI
oncesayathing,IconceivethatIhaveboundmyself,andthatdeliveringittotheknowledgeofanother,Ihavepositivelyenjoineditmyownperformance。MethinksIpromiseit,ifIbutsayit:andthereforeamnotapttosaymuchofthatkind。ThesentencethatIpassuponmyselfismoreseverethanthatofajudge,whoonlyconsidersthecommonobligation;butmyconsciencelooksuponitwithamoresevereandpenetratingeye。IlaginthosedutiestowhichIshouldbecompelledifIdidnotgo:
"Hocipsumitajustumest,quodrectefit,siestvoluntarium。"
["Thisitselfissofarjust,thatitisrightlydone,ifitisvoluntary。"——Cicero,DeOffic。,i。9。]
Iftheactionhasnotsomesplendourofliberty,ithasneithergracenorhonour:
"Quodvosjuscogit,vixvoluntateimpetrent:"
["Thatwhichthelawscompelustodo,wescarcelydowithawill。"
——Terence,Adelph。,iii。3,44。
wherenecessitydrawsme,Ilovetoletmywilltakeitsowncourse:
"Quiaquicquidimperiocogitur,exigentimagis,quampraestanti,acceptumrefertur。"
["Forwhateveriscompelledbypower,ismoreimputedtohimthatexactsthantohimthatperforms。"——ValeriusMaximus,ii。2,6。]
Iknowsomewhofollowthisrule,eventoinjustice;whowillsoonergivethanrestore,soonerlendthanpay,andwilldothemtheleastgoodtowhomtheyaremostobliged。Idon’tgosofarasthat,butI’mnotfaroff。
Isomuchlovetodisengageanddisobligatemyself,thatIhavesometimeslookeduponingratitudes,affronts,andindignitieswhichIhavereceivedfromthosetowhomeitherbynatureoraccidentIwasboundinsomewayoffriendship,asanadvantagetome;takingthisoccasionoftheirill—
usage,foranacquaintanceanddischargeofsomuchofmydebt。AndthoughIstillcontinuetopaythemalltheexternalofficesofpublicreason,I,notwithstanding,findagreatsavingindoingthatupontheaccountofjusticewhichIdiduponthescoreofaffection,andamalittleeasedoftheattentionandsolicitudeofmyinwardwill:
"Estprudentissustinere,utcurrum,sicimpetumbenevolentia;"
["’Tisthepartofawisemantokeepacurbinghandupontheimpetusoffriendship,asuponthatofhishorse。"
——Cicero,DeAmicit。,c。17。]
’tisinme,toourgingandpressingwhereItake;atleast,foramanwholovesnottobestrainedatall。AndthishusbandingmyfriendshipservesmeforasortofconsolationintheimperfectionsofthoseinwhomIamconcerned。IamverysorrytheyarenotsuchasIcouldwishtheywere,butthenIalsoamsparedsomewhatofmyapplicationandengagementtowardsthem。Iapproveofamanwhoisthelessfondofhischildforhavingascaldhead,orforbeingcrooked;andnotonlywhenheisill—
conditioned,butalsowhenheisofunhappydisposition,andimperfectinhislimbs(Godhimselfhasabatedsomuchfromhisvalueandnaturalestimation),providedhecarryhimselfinthiscoldnessofaffectionwithmoderationandexactjustice:proximity,withme,lessensnotdefects,butratheraggravatesthem。
Afterall,accordingtowhatIunderstandinthescienceofbenefitandacknowledgment,whichisasubtlescience,andofgreatuse,IknownopersonwhatevermorefreeandlessindebtedthanIamatthishour。WhatIdooweissimplytoforeignobligationsandbenefits;astoanythingelse,nomanismoreabsolutelyclear:
"NecsuntmihinotapotentumMunera。"
["Thegiftsofgreatmenareunknowntome。"——AEneid,xii。529。]
Princesgivemeagreatdealiftheytakenothingfromme;anddomegoodenoughiftheydomenoharm;that’sallIaskfromthem。OhowamI
obligedtoGod,thathehasbeenpleasedIshouldimmediatelyreceivefromhisbountyallIhave,andspeciallyreservedallmyobligationtohimself。HowearnestlydoIbegofhisholycompassionthatImayneveroweessentialthankstoanyone。OhappylibertywhereinIhavethusfarlived。Mayitcontinuewithmetothelast。Iendeavourtohavenoexpressneedofanyone:
"Inmeomnisspecestmihi。"
["Allmyhopeisinmyself。"——Terence,Adelph。,iii。5,9。]
’Tiswhateveryonemaydoinhimself,butmoreeasilytheywhomGodhasplacedinaconditionexemptfromnaturalandurgentnecessities。Itisawretchedanddangerousthingtodependuponothers;weourselves,inwhomiseverthemostjustandsafestdependence,arenotsufficientlysure。