PARTVIII
　　RELIGIOUSDEVELOPMENT
　　CHAPTERLVIII
　　EARLYIMPRESSIONS——1832—1851
　　WhenthecolonistsfromNewEnglandcameintocentralandwesternNewYork，attheendoftheeighteenthcentury，theywrotetheirmainideaslargeuponthetownstheyfounded。EspeciallywasthisevidentatmybirthplaceontheheadwatersoftheSusquehanna。
　　Intheheartofthelittlevillagetheylaidout，largelyandliberally，"theGreen";acrossthemiddleofthistheregraduallyrosealineofwoodenstructuresasstatelyastheyknewhowtomakethem，——theorthodoxCongregationalchurchstandingatthecenter;closebesidethischurchstoodthe"academy";andthen，oneitherside，thechurchesoftheBaptists，Methodists，andEpiscopalians。Thuswererepresentedreligion，education，andchurchequality。
　　TheEpiscopalchurch，asbelongingtotheleastnumerouscongregation，wasattheextremeleft，andthesmallestbuildingofall。Itwaseasilyrecognized。Alltheotherswereinasortofquasi—Italianstyleoftheseventeenthcentury，likethosecommonlyfoundinNewEngland;butthiswasinakindof"carpenter’sGothic"whichhadgrownoutofvaguerecollectionsofthemother—country。TothisbuildingIwastakenforbaptism，andwithitareconnectedmyfirstrecollectionsofpublicworship。MyparentswereverydevotedmembersoftheProtestantEpiscopalChurch。Withasmallnumberofothersoflikemind，theyhadtakenrefugeinitfromthestormsoffanaticismwhichsweptthroughwesternNewYorkduringtheearlyyearsofthenineteenthcentury。Forthatwasthetimeofgreat"revivals。"
　　ThetremendousassertionsofJonathanEdwardsregardingthetyrannyofGod，havingbeentakenupbyamultitudeofmenwhowereinfinitelyEdwards’sinferiorsineverythingsavelung—power，werespreadwithmuchdinthroughmanychurches:
　　picturesofanangryMolochholdingovertheinfernalfiresthecreatureswhomhehadpredestinedtorebel，andthestatementthat"hellisfilledwithinfantsnotaspanlong，"wereamongthechoiceoratoricaloutgrowthsofthisperiod。Withtheseloudandluridutteranceswentstrivingsaftersacerdotalrule。Thepresbyter——"oldpriestwritlarge"——tookhighgroundinallthesevillages:thesimplestandmostharmlessamusementsweredenounced，andchurchmembersguiltyoftakingpartinthemwereobligedtostandinthebroadaisleandbepubliclyreprimandedfromthepulpit。
　　Mymotherwasthoughtful，gentle，andkindly;inthemidstofallthisfrothandfurysomeonelentheraprayer—book;thisledhertojoininthedevotionsofalittleknotofpeoplewhohadbeenbroughtuptouseit;andamongtheseshefoundpeace。Myfather，whowasamanofgreatenergyandvigor，wasattractedtothislittlecompany;andnotlongafterwardrosethelittlechurchontheGreen，servedatfirstbysuchclergymenaschancedtobeinthatpartoftheState。
　　AmongthesewasarecentgraduateoftheEpiscopalCollegeatGenevaonSenecaLake——HenryGregory。Hisseemedtobeasoulwhichbysomemistakehadescapedoutofthethirteenthcenturyintothenineteenth。Hewasslightinbuild，delicateinhealth，andasceticinhabits，hisoneinterestintheworldbeingtheupbuildingofthekingdomofGod——asheunderstoodit。ItwasthetimewhenPusey，Newman，Keble，andtheircompeerswererevivingmediaevalChristianity;theirideastookstrongholduponmanyearnestmeninthewesternworld，andamongthesenooneabsorbedthemmorefullythanthisyoungmissionary。Hewashonest，fearless，self—sacrificing，andthesequalitiessoongavehimastrongholduponhisflock，——theholdofamediaevalsaintuponpilgrimsseekingrefugefromaworldcruelandperverse。
　　Seeingthis，sundryclergymenandinfluentiallaymenofwhatwereknownasthe"evangelicaldenominations"attemptedtorefutehisargumentsanddiscredithispractices。Thatwastheverythingwhichheandhiscongregationmostneeded:underthisoppositionhisfervordeepened，hismediaevalcharacteristicsdeveloped，hislittlebandofthefaithfulincreased，andmoreandmoretheyadoredhim;butthisadorationdidnotintheleastinjurehim:
　　heremainedthesamegentle，fearless，narrow，uncompromisingmanthroughouthislonglifeMyfirstrecollectionsofreligiousworshipinthelittleoldchurchtakemebacktomyfourthyear;andIcanrememberwell，attheageoffive，standingbetweenmyfatherandmother，readingthePsalterwiththemasbestIcould，joininginthechantsandlookingwithgreataweontheserviceasitwentonbeforemyadmiringeyes。SomuchdiditimpressmethatfrommysixthtomytwelfthyearIalwayslookedforwardtoSundaymorningwithlonging。Theprayers，thechants，thehymns，allhadagreatattractionforme，——andthisalthoughIwassomewhatseverelyheldtotheproperobservanceofworship。Irememberwellthatattheageofsixyears，ifIfalteredinthepublicreadingofthePsalter，agentleraponthesideofmyheadfrommyfather’sknucklesremindedmeofmyduty。
　　AtvarioustimessinceIhavebeenpresentatthemostgorgeousservicesoftheAnglican，Latin，Russian，andOrientalchurches;
　　haveheardthePope，surroundedbyhiscardinals，singmassatthehighaltarofSt。Peter’s;haveseentheMetropolitanArchbishopofMoscow，surroundedbyprelatesoftheRussianEmpire，conducttheburialofaczar;haveseenthehighestLutherandignitariessolemnizethemarriageofaGermankaiser;
　　havesatundertheministrationsofsundryarchbishopsofCanterbury;havebeenpresentathighmassperformedbytheArchbishopofAthensundertheshadowofMarsHillandtheParthenon;and，thoughIamsingularlysusceptibletotheinfluenceofsuchpageants，especiallyiftheyareaccompaniedbynoblemusic，nooneofthesehasevermadesogreatanimpressionuponmeasthatsimpleAnglo—Americanserviceperformedbyasurplicedclergymanwithacountrychoiranddevoutassemblageinthislittlevillagechurch。Curiouslyenough，onecustom，whichhigh—churchmenlongagodiscardedasbeneaththeproperdignityoftheservice，wasperhapsthethingwhichimpressedmemost，andIhavesincelearnedthatitgenerallythusimpressednew—comerstotheEpiscopalChurch:thiswastheretirementoftheclergyman，atthecloseoftheregularmorningprayer，tothevestry，wherehelefthissurplice，andwhenceheemergedinablackGenevagown，inwhichhethenpreachedthesermon。Thissimplefeatureintheceremonialgreatlyimpressedme，andledmetoaskthereasonforit:atwhichanswerwasmadethattheclergymanworehiswhitesurpliceaslongashewasusingGod’swords，butthatheworehisblackgownwheneverheusedhisown。
　　ThoughcomparativelylittlewassaidbyEpiscopaliansregardingreligiousexperiencesorpiousstatesofmind，therewasanatmosphereoforderlydecencyduringthewholeservicewhichcouldhardlyfailtomakeanimpressiononallthinkingchildrenbroughtintoit。Irememberthatwhen，ononeortwooccasions，I
　　wastakentotheCongregationalchurchbymygrandmother，Iwasmuchshockedatwhatseemedtometheunfitdressandconductoftheclergyman，——inacutawaycoat，lounginguponasofa，——andattheirreverentwaysofthesturdyfarmers，whomadereadytoleavethechurchduringthefinalprayer，andevenwhiletheyshouldhavebeenreceivingthebenediction。
　　Ithusbecameadevotee。OfthesermonsIretainedlittle，exceptafewstrikingassertionsorlargewords;oneofmyamusements，onreturninghome，wasconductingasortofservice，onmyownaccount，withthoseofthehouseholdwhowerewillingtotakepartinit;and，fromsometraditionspreservedinthefamilyregardingmyutterancesonsuchoccasions，adrollsortofserviceitmusthavebeen。
　　InmyseventhyearthefamilyremovedtoSyracuse，the"CentralCity"oftheState，alreadybeginningawonderfulcareer，althoughatthattimeoflessthansixthousandinhabitants。Myexperienceinthenewcitywasprefacedbyanexcursion，withmyfatherandmotherandyoungerbrother，toBuffaloandNiagara;
　　andastherailwaysthroughcentralNewYorkwerethenunfinished，——and，indeed，butfewofthembegun，——wemadethejourneyalmostentirelyonacanal—packet。PerhapsmymostvividremembranceofthisvoyageisthatofthefervidprayersIthenputupagainstshipwreck。
　　AtSyracusewasamuchlargerandmoreinfluentialProtestantEpiscopalchurchthanthatwhichwehadleft，——next，indeed，inimportancetothePresbyterianbody。Thatchurch——St。Paul’s——hassincebecomethemotherofalargenumberofothers，andhasbeenmadethecathedralofanewdiocese。Inthismyfather，byvirtueofhisvigorineverythingheundertook，wassoonmadeavestryman，andfinallyseniorwarden;and，therectoratehappeningtofallvacant，herecommendedfortheplaceourformerclergyman，HenryGregory。Hecame，andhisworkinthenewplacewassoonevenmoreeffectivethanintheold。
　　Hisfirstinfluencemademeamostdeterminedlittlebigot，andI
　　rememberwellmybattlesinbehalfofhigh—churchideaswithvariousPresbyterianboys，andespeciallywiththesonofthePresbyterianpastor。InthosedayswentonafamouscontroversyprovokedbyaspeechataNewEnglanddinnerinthecityofNewYorkwhichhadsetbytheearstwoeminentdivines——theRev。Dr。
　　Wainwright，Episcopalian，andtheRev。Dr。Potts;Presbyterian。
　　Dr。PottshadinsistedthatthePuritanshadfoundeda"churchwithoutabishopandastatewithoutaking";Dr。Wainwrightinsistedthattherecouldbenochurchwithoutabishop;andonthisthetwochampionsjoinedissue。Armedwiththeweaponsfurnishedmeinthechurchcatechism，insundrysermons，andinpiousreading，Itookupthecudgels，andthebattlesthenwagedweremanyandsevere。
　　Onelittleoutgrowthofmyreligiousintolerancewasquicklynippedinthebud。AsIwasreturninghomeoneeveningwithagroupofscampishboys，oneofthempointedoutthe"Jewstore，"——inthosedaysanewthing，——andremindedusthattheproprietorworshipedonSaturdayand，doubtless，committedotherabominations。Atthis，withoneaccord，wedidwhatwecouldtometeouttheOldTestamentpunishmentforblasphemy——wethrewstonesathisdoor。Myfather，hearingofthis，dealtwithmesharplyandshortly，andtaughtmemosteffectuallytoleavedealingwiththeJewishreligiontotheAlmighty。Ihaveneversincebeentemptedtojoininanyanti—Semiticmovementwhatever。
　　MeanwhileMr。Gregory——or，asheafterwardbecame，Dr。
　　Gregory——wasfightingthebattlesofthechurchinmanyways，andsomeofhissermonsmadeagreatimpressionuponme。Oftheseonewasentitled"TheChurchnotaSect，"thetextbeing，"Forastothissect，weknowthatitiseverywherespokenagainst。"Anothersermonshowed，especially，hisuncompromisingspiritandtookyetstrongerholduponme;itwasgivenonanoccasionwhenPresbyterians，Methodists，andBaptistsweredrawninlargenumberstohischurch;but，disdainingalleffortstopropitiatethem，hetookashissubject"TheSinofKorah，"whosethimselfupagainsttheregularlyordainedpriesthood，andwas，withallhisadherents，fearfullypunished。Theconclusionwaseasilydrawnbyallthe"dissenters"present。Onanotheroccasionofthesamesort，whenhischurchwasfilledwithpeoplefromothercongregations，hetookashissubjectthestoryofNaamantheSyrian，histextbeing，"ArenotAbanaandPharphar，riversofDamascus，betterthanalltheriversofIsrael？MayInotwashinthemandbeclean？"Thegoodrector’sanswerwas，ineffect，"No，youmaynot。TheAlmightydesignatedtheriverJordanasthemeansforsecuringhealthandsafety;andsointhesetimeshehasdesignatedforasimilarpurposethechurch——whichistheProtestantEpiscopalChurch:outsideofthat——astheoneappointedbyhim——youhavenohope。"
　　Butgraduallytherecameinmymindareaction，andcuriously，itstartedfrommyloveformygrandmother——mymother’smother。
　　AmongallthewomenwhomIrememberinmyearlylife，shewasthekindestandmostlovely。Shehadbeenbroughtasayounggirl，byherparents，fromOldGuilfordinConnecticut;andinherlaterlifesheoftentoldmecheerilyofthedaysofprivationandtoil，ofwolveshowlingaboutthecottagesofthelittleNewYorksettlementinwinter，ofjourneystwentymilestochurch，ofridingonhorsebackfromearlymorninguntillateintheevening，throughtheforests，tobringflourfromthemill。Shewasquietlyreligious，readingeverydayfromherNewTestament，butremainingintheoldCongregationalChurchwhichmymotherhadleft。IrememberonceaskingherwhyshedidnotgowiththerestofustotheEpiscopalChurch。Heranswerwas，"Well，dearchild，theEpiscopalChurchisjustthechurchforyourfatherandmotherandforyouchildren;youareallyoungandactive，butI
　　amgettingoldandratherstout，andthereisalittletoomuchgettingupandsittingdowninyourchurchforme。"TotheharshCalvinismofhercreedsheseemedtopaynoattention，and，ifhardpressedbyme，usedtosay，"Well，sonny，thereis，ofcourse，somemercifulwayoutofitall。"Herreligiontookeverykindlyform。Shelovedeverypersonworthloving，——andsomenotworthloving，——andherbenefactionswereextendedtopeopleofeverycreed;especiallywassheasortofProvidencetothepoorCatholicIrishofthelowerpartofthetown。Touschildrenshewasespeciallydevoted——reconcilingusinourquarrels，soothingusinoursorrows，comfortingusinourdisappointments，andcarryingusthroughoursicknesses。Sheusedgreatcommonsenseinhercareofus;kindlyandgentletothelastdegree，therewasonethingshewouldneverallow，andthiswasthatthechildren，evenwhentheybecamequitelarge，shouldbeoutofthehouse，inthestreetsorpublicplaces，afterdark，withoutanelderlyandtrustycompanion。ThoughmybrotherandIusedtoregardthisasheronefault，itwasreallyagreatservicetous;for，assoonasduskcameon，ifweweretemptedtolingerinthestreetsorinpublicplaces，wereturnedhome，sinceweknewthatifwedidnotweshouldsoonseehercomingtoremindus，andthiswas，ofcourse，aseriousblowtoourpride。
　　When，then，Isatinchurchandheardourmediaevalsaintpreachwithardorandunction，SundayafterSunday，thatthepromisesweremadetothechurchalone;thatthoseoutsideithadvirtuallynopartinGod’sgoodness;thattheywereprobablylost，——Ithoughtofthisdear，sweetoldlady，andmyheartroseinrebellion。ShewascertainlythebestChristianIknew，andtheideathatsheshouldbepunishedforsayingherprayersinthePresbyterianChurchwasabhorrenttome。Imadeupmymindthat，ifshewastobelost，Iwouldbelostwithher;andsoon，undertheinfluenceofthoughtslikethese，Ibecameareligiousrebel。
　　Thematterwaslittlehelpedwhenourgoodrectorpreacheduponretributionforsin。Heheldthemostextremeviewsregardingfuturepunishment;andthemorehedevelopedthem，themoremymindrejectedtheideathatsomanygoodpeopleaboutme，especiallytheonewhomIlovedsomuch，couldbesubjectedtosuchtortures，——andthemoremyheartrebelledagainsttheMolochwhohadestablishedandwasadministeringsohorribleasystem。I
　　musthavebeenabouttwelveyearsoldwhenitthusoccurredtometoquestionthewholesacredtheory;andthisquestioningwasstartedintovigorouslifeaftervisiting，withsomeotherschool—boys，thePresbyterianchurchwhena"revival"wasgoingon。AsIentered，averyunspiritual—lookingpreacherwaslayingdownthemostseveredoctrinesofdivineretribution。Infrontofhimwereseveralofourneighbors’daughters，manyofthemmyschoolmates，whomIregardedasthoroughlysweetandgood;andtheywereintears，apparentlybroken—heartedunderthestormofwrathwhichpouredoverthemfromthemouthoftherevivalpreacher。AtthisIrevoltedentirely，andfromthatmomentI
　　disbelievedinthewholedoctrine，utterlyandtotally。Ifeltthatthesekindlygirls，towhomIhadlookedwithsomuchadmirationintheclassesatschoolandinourvariouslittlegatherings，wereinfinitelymoreworthyofthedivinefavorthanwasthebig，fleshlycreaturestormingandragingandclaimingtoannounceadivinemessage。
　　Someinfluenceonmyyouthfulthinkinghadalsobeenexercisedbysundryoccurrencesinourownparish。Ourgoodrectorwasespeciallyfondofpreachingupon"baptismalregeneration";
　　takingtheextremehigh—churchviewandtherebydrivingoutsomeofthebest"evangelicals"fromhiscongregation。OneoftheseI
　　rememberespecially——aserene，dignifiedoldman，Mr。JohnDurnford。AfterheleftourchurchhetookhisplaceamongthePresbyterians，andIremember，despitemybroad—churchtendencies，thinkingthathewasincurringseriousdangerbysuchapostasy;butasInotedhim，yearafteryear，devotinghimselftothenewlyfoundedorphan—asylum，givingallhissparetimetothecareofthechildrengatheredthere，evengoingintothemarketandthencebearingprovisionstotheminabasket，Ibegantofeelthatperhapshissoulwassafe，afterall。Ibethoughtmyselfthat，withallmyreadingoftheBible，IhadneverfoundanytextwhichrequiredamantobelieveinthedoctrinesoftheProtestantEpiscopalChurch;butthatIhadfound，inthewordsofJesushimself，aswellasinthetextofStJamesregarding"purereligionandundefiled，"declarationswhichseemedtocommend，especially，laborsforthepoor，fatherless，andafflicted，likethoseofMr。Durnford。
　　Butstillmoremarkedwastheinfluenceonmythinkingofapainfulclashintheparish。Itcameonthiswise。Ourrectorwasonedaycalledtoattendthefuneralofalittlechildbutafewweeksold，thedaughterofneighborsofours。Thefatherwasabig—bodied，big—hearted，big—voiced，successfulmanofbusiness，welllikedforhisbluffcordialityandgenerosity，whowenttochurchbecausehiswifewent。Themotherwasasweet，kindly，delicatewoman，thedaughterofaclergyman，anddevotedtothechurch。
　　Ithappenedthat，forvariousreasons，andmoreespeciallyonaccountoftheabsenceofthefatherfromhomeonbusiness，thebaptismofthechildhadbeendelayeduntilitssuddendeathpreventedtheriteforever。
　　Thefamilyandneighborsbeingassembledatthehouse，andtheserviceabouttobegin，anoldmaidenlady，whohaddeeplyabsorbedtheteachingsofDr。Gregoryandwishedtoimpressthemonthosepresent，saidtothefather，audiblyandwithagroan，"Oh，Mr。————，whatapitythatthebabywasnotbaptized！"towhichtherectorresponded，withadeepsighandinamostplaintivevoice，"Yes！"Thereuponthemotherofthechildburstintoloudandpassionateweeping，andatthisthefather，bigandimpulsiveashewas，lostallcontrolofhimself。Risingfromhischair，hestrodetothesideoftherectorandsaid，"ThatisaslanderontheAlmighty;nonebutadevilcould，formynegligence，punishthislovelylittlechildbyagesoftorture。
　　Takeitback——takeitback，sir;or，bytheGodthatmadeus，I
　　willtakeyoubytheneckandthrowyouintothestreet！"AtthisthegentlerectorfalteredoutthathedidnotpresumetolimitthemercyofGod，andafteratimetheservicewenton;butsermonsonbaptismalregenerationfromourpulpitwereneverafterwardfrequentorcogent。
　　StartledasIwasatthisscene，Ifeltthatthedoctrinehadnotstoodthetest。MoreandmoretherewasdevelopedinmethatfeelingwhichLordBaconexpressedsoprofoundlyandpithily，inhisessayon"Superstition，"whenhesaid:
　　ItwerebettertohavenoopinionofGodatall，thansuchanopinionasisunworthyofHim;foriftheoneisunbelief，theotheriscontumely:andcertainlysuperstitionisthereproachoftheDeity。Plutarchsaithwelltothatpurpose:"Surely，IhadratheragreatdealthatmenshouldsaytherewasnosuchmanatallasPlutarch，thanthattheyshouldsaythatPlutarchatehischildrenassoonastheywereborn;"——asthepoetsspeakofSaturn:andasthecontumelyisgreatertowardsGod，sothedangerisgreatertowardsmen。
　　The"danger"ofwhichBaconspeakshasbeennotedbymeoften，bothbeforeandsinceIreadhisessays。Once，indeed，whenaveryorthodoxladyhaddeclaredtomeherconvictionthateverydisbelieverinthedivinityofthesecondpersonintheTrinitymustbelost，Iwarnedherofthisdangerandsaid，"WelatelyhadPresidentGranthereontheuniversitygrounds。Supposeyourlittlegirl，havingmetthePresident，andhavingbeentoldthathewasthegreatgeneralofthewarandPresidentoftheUnitedStates，shouldassertherdisbelief，basingitonthefactthatshehadformedtheideaofamuchmoreshowyandgorgeouspersonthanthisquiet，modestlittleman;andsupposethatGeneralGrant，onhearingofthechild’smistake，shouldcruellypunishherforit;whatwouldyouthinkofhim？andwhatwouldhethinkofyou，werehetoknowthatyouassertedthathecouldbesocontemptiblyunjustandcruel？Thechild’sutterancewouldnotintheslightestoffendhim，butyourimputationtohimofsuchvilenesswouldmostcertainlyangerhim。"
　　Acontributiontomyreligiousdevelopmentcamealsofromaverydifferentquarter。OurkitchenBridget，oneofthebestofherkind，lentmeherbookofdevotion——the"UrsulineManual。"ItinterestedmemuchuntilIfoundinitthereasonsverycogentlygivenwhysalvationwasconfinedtotheRomanCatholicChurch。
　　Thisdisgustedme。Accordingtothis，evenourgoodrectorhadnomorechanceofsalvationthanaPresbyterianorBaptistorMethodistminister。Butthisseriousviewofthecasewasdisturbedbyahumorousanalogy。Therewerethenfightingvigorouslythroughtheadvertisementcolumnsofthenewspaperstworivaldoctors，eachclaimingtoproducetheonlysalutary"sarsaparilla，"andeachnamedTownsend。Atfirstoneclaimedtobe"THEDr。Townsend，"thentheotherclaimedtobe"THEDr。
　　Townsend";thefirstrejoinedthatHEwas"Dr。JACOBTownsend，"
　　whereupontheotherinsistedthatHEwas"Dr。JacobTownsend";tothisthefirstansweredthatHEwas"theORIGINALDr。JacobTownsend，"andtheotherthendeclaredthatHEwas"theORIGINAL
　　Dr。JacobTownsend";andsoon，throughissueafterissue，eachsupplyingstatements，certificates，arguments，rejoindersadnauseam。Moreandmore，then，thevariousdivinesinsistingontheexclusivepossessionoftheonlyremedyforsinremindedmeoftheseeminentsarsaparilla—makers，——eachdeclaringhisownconcoctiongenuineandallothersspurious，eachglorifyinghimselfaspossessingtheoriginalrecipeanddenouncinghisrivalsaspretenders。
　　AnothercontributiontomythoughtwasmadeonedayintheSunday—school。WhilereadingintheNewTestamentIhadnoticedthedifficultiesinvolvedinthetwogenealogiesofJesusofNazareth——thatinMatthewandthatinLuke。OnmyaskingtheSunday—schoolteacherforanexplanation，hegavetheoffhandanswerthatonewasthegenealogyofJosephandtheotherofMary。Ofcourseitdidnottakemelongtofindthisanswerinadequate;and，asaconsequence，Sunday—schoolteachinglostmuchofitseffectuponme。
　　Buttherewasstillonepowerfulinfluenceleftinbehalfoftheoldcreed。Fromtimetotimecamethevisitationbythebishop，Dr。DeLancey。HewasthemostIMPRESSIVEmanIhaveeverseen。I
　　havestoodinthepresenceofmanyprelatesinmyday，fromPopePiusIXdown;butnooneofthemhaseversoawedmeasthisBishopofWesternNewYork。Hisentryintoachurchchancelwasanevent;nomusiccouldbefinerthanhisreadingoftheservice;hisconfirmationprayerstilldwellsinmymemoryasthemostperfectpetitionIhaveeverheard;andhissimple，earnestsermonstookstrongholdofme。Hispersonalinfluencewasalsogreat。Goldsmith’slinesinthe"DesertedVillage，"
　　"Evenchildrenfollow’dwithendearingwileAndpluck’dhisgown，tosharethegoodman’ssmile，"
　　accuratelypicturedthefeelingsofmanyofusaswelingeredafterservicetoseehimgreetourfathersandmothers。
　　Astomybiblicalstudies，theywerecontinued，thoughnotperhapsassystematicallyastheymightwellhavebeen。TheProtestantEpiscopalChurchhasforayouthatleastoneadvantageinthisrespect，——thattheservicesincludingIntroits，Canticles，Psalter，Lessons，EpistlesGospels，andvariousquotations，familiarizehimwiththenoblestutterancesinoursacredbooks。MymotherhadreceivedinstructioninBibleclassandprizedScripturereading;thereforeitwasthat，whenIwasallowedtostayathomefromchurchonSundayafternoons，itwasalwaysonconditionthatIshouldreadacertainnumberofchaptersintheBibleandprovetoheruponherreturnthatIhadreadthemcarefully，——andthiswasnotwithoutitsuses。
　　HereIamremindedofasomewhatcuriousevent。Oneafternoon，whenIhadbeenpermittedtoremainathome，ontheusualconditions，mymother，returningfromservice，saidtomethatbystayingawayfromchurchIhadmissedsomethingveryinteresting:
　　thattherewasagoodsermonwellgiven，thatthepreacherwasoffineappearance，dignified，——andanIndian;butthatshewouldneverhavesuspectedhimtobeanIndianwereitnotforhiswordsattheconclusionofhissermon，whichwereasfollows:
　　"Andnow，mybrethren，Ileaveyou。Weshallprobablynevermeetagaininthisworld，anddoubtlessmostofyouwillforgetallthecounselsIhavegivenyouandremembernothingsavethatyouhaveto—dayheardasermonfromanIndian。"Thepointofinterestreallywasthatthispreacher，EleazarWilliams，thoughhegavenohintofitonthisoccasion，believedhimself，andwasbelievedbymany，tobethelostDauphinofFrance，LouisXVII，andthatdecidedlyskilfulargumentsinfavorofhisclaimswerepublishedbytheRev。Mr。Hansonandothers。OneofthemostintelligentwomenIhaveeverknownbelievestothishourthatEleazarWilliams，generallyknownasahalf—breedIndianborninCanada，wasthesonofLouisXVIandMarieAntoinette，andthathisportlyformandBourbonfacewereconvincingadditionstoothermorecogenttestimonies。
　　AtvarioustimesIsoughtlightfromnewsources，and，findingonthefamilyshelvesaseriesofbookscalledthe"EvangelicalFamilyLibrary，"IreadsundryrepliestoHume，Gibbon，andotherdeists;buttheargumentsofHumeandGibbonandthosewhothoughtwiththemseemedtome，tosaytheleast，quiteasforcibleasthoseinanswertothem。Theserepliessimplystrengthenedmytendencytodoubt，andwhatIheardatchurchratherincreasedthedifficulty;forthefavoritesubjectsofsermonsintheEpiscopalChurchofthosedays，afterthe"ApostolicalSuccession"and"BaptismalRegeneration，"weretheperfectionsofthechurchorder，thebeautyofitsservices，andthealmostdivinecharacterofthePrayer—book。Thesetopicsweredevelopedinallthemoodsandtenses;thebeautiesofourownservicewereconstantlycontrastedwiththecruditiesandabsurditiesoftheworshippractisedbyothers;andalthough，sincethosedays，lefttomyownobservation，Ihavefoundmuchtruthinthesecomparisons，theyproduceduponmeatthattimeanythingbutagoodeffect。Itwaslikeabeautifulwomancomingintoanassemblage;callingattentiontotheperfectionsofherownface，form，andgarments;claimingloudlytobethemostbeautifulpersonintheroom;andso，finally，becomingtheleastattractivepersonpresent。
　　Thisstateofmindwasdeepenedbymyfirstexperiencesatcollege。Ihad，frommyearlyboyhood，wishedtogotoYale;but，underpressurefromthebishop，IwassenttothelittlechurchcollegeatGenevainwesternNewYorkTherewereexcellentmenamongitsprofessors——menwhomIcametoloveandadmire;butitsfaculty，itsendowment，itsequipment，wereinsufficient，andforfearofdrivingawaythesonsofitswealthyandinfluentialpatronsitcouldnotaffordtoinsisteitheronhighscholarshiporgooddiscipline，sothattheworkdonewasmostunsatisfactory。AndhereImaymentionthattheespecialclaimputforthbythiscollege，asbysomanyotherslikeitthroughoutthecountry，wasthat，withsosmallabodyofstudentsdirectlyunderchurchcontrol，boththeintellectualandreligiousinterestsofthestudentswouldbebetterguardedthantheycouldbeinthelargerandcomparativelyunsectarianinstitutions。Theverycontrarywasthentrue;andvariousexperienceshaveshownmethat，asarule，littlesectariancolleges，iftoofeebletoexercisestrongdisciplineorinsistonthoroughwork，arethemoredangerous。Asitwas，Ifeltthatinthisparticularcaseawronghadbeendonemeandchargedthatwrongagainstthechurchsystem。
　　Ihavebeengladtolearnoflateyearsthatthecollegejustreferredtohas，sincemystudentdays，sharedtheupwardprogressofitssisterinstitutionsandthatwithmoremeansandbetterappliancesasuccessionofsuperiorinstructorshavebeenabletobringitsstudentsintosteadygoodworkandunderexcellentdiscipline。
　　Muchwasmadeinthosedaysofthe"Christianevidences，"andonestatementthenputforth，regardingthemiraculous，producedatemporaryeffectuponme。ThisstatementwasthattheclaimsofthereligionsopposedtoChristianitydidnotrestuponmiracles;
　　thattherewas，atanyrate，norealtestimonytoanyexceptChristianmiracles;andthat，asarule，otherreligionsdidnotpretendtoexhibitany。ButwhenI，shortlyafterward，readthelifeofMohammed，andsawwhatagreatpartwasplayedbyhismiracleatthebattleofBeder，duringwhich，onhisthrowingdustintotheair，therecametohisrescuelegionsofangels，whowereseenandtestifiedtobymanyonthefield，——bothbyhisfriendsandbyhisenemies;andwhenIfoundthatmiraculoustestimoniesplayaleadingpartinallreligions，eveninfavorofdoctrinesthemostcruelandabsurd，Ifeltthatthe"evidences"mustbeweakwhichbroughtforwardanargumentsoillgrounded。Moreover，inmyvariedreadingIcameacrossmultitudesofmiraclesattributedtosaintsoftheRomanCatholicChurch，——miraclesforwhichmyriadsofgoodmenandwomenwerereadytolaydowntheirlivesinattestationoftheirbelief，——andifwemustacceptoneclassofmiracles，Icouldnotseewhyweshouldnotaccepttheother。
　　Atthecloseofthisfirstyear，forreasonsgivenelsewhere，I
　　brokeawayfromthislittlecollegeandwenttoYale。
　　CHAPTERLIX
　　INTHENEWENGLANDATMOSPHERE——1851—1853
　　AtYaleIfoundmyselfinthemidstofNewEnglandCongregationalism;butIcannotsaythatithelpedmemuchreligiously。It，indeed，broadenedmyview，sinceIwasassociatedwithprofessorsandstudentsofvariousformsofChristianity，andcametorespectthem，notforwhattheyprofessed，butforwhattheyreallywere。
　　TherealsoIreadunderanexcellentprofessor——mydearfriendthelatePresidentPorter——Butler’s"Analogy";but，thoughitimpressedme，itleftonmymindtheeffectofastrongpieceofspecialpleading，——ofaseriesofargumentsequallyvaluableforanyreligionwhichhadonce"gotitselfestablished。"
　　Here，too，arepellentinfluencewasexerciseduponmebya"revival。"Whatwascalleda"religiousinterest"begantobeshowninsundrystudentmeetings，andsoonitcameinwithafulltide。Iwasinducedtogointooneortwooftheseassemblies，andwassomewhatimpressedbythepenitenceshownandthepledgesgivenbysomeofmycollegefriends。Butwithinayearthewholethingwasdead。SeveralofthemenwhohadbeenloudestintheirexpressionsofpenitenceanddeterminationtoacceptChristianitybecameworsethanever:theywerelikelogsstrandedhighanddryafterafreshet。
　　Butthisreligiousrevivalincollegewasinfinitelybetterthanonewhichranitscourseintheimmediateneighborhood。JustatthecornerofthecollegegroundswasaMethodistEpiscopalchurch，theprincipaloneinNewHaven，and，aprofessionalrevivalisthavingbegunhisworkthere，thechurchwassoonthronged。Blasphemyandribaldrywerethepreacher’sgreatattractions。Oneoftheprayersattributedtohimranasfollows:
　　"Comedownamongus，OLord！Comestraightthroughtheroof;I’llpayfortheshingles！"Nightafternightthegallerieswerecrowdedwithstudentslaughingatthisimpiousfarce;andamongthem，oneevening，came"Charley"ChotardofMississippi。Chotardwasaveryhandsomefellow:slender，wellformed，sixfeetthreeinchestall，andinanycrowdamanofmark，likeKingSaul。Inthemidstoftheproceedings，atsomegrotesqueutteranceoftherevivalist，thestudentsinthegalleriesburstintolaughter。
　　Thepreacher，angrilyturninghiseyesupontheoffenders，saw，firstofall，Chotard，andcalledouttohim:"Youlightning—rodofhell，youflag—staffofdamnation，comedownfromthere！"Ofcoursenosuchgrotesquesceneswereeverallowedinthecollegechapel:theservicesthere，thoughsimple，werealwaysdignified;
　　yeteveninthesetheresometimesappearedincongruousfeatures。
　　Accordingtotraditioninmytime，anageddivine，greatlyandjustlybeloved，fromaneighboringcity，hadbeenaskedtopreachbeforethestudents。ItwasatthetimewhenthewholeEnglish—speakingworldhadbeenthrilledbythestoryofthereliefofLucknow，andthecryoftheScotchlassiewhoheardthedefiantsloganandheart—stirringpibrochoftheHighlanderscomingtothereliefofthebesiegedhadechoedacrossalltheoceans。Towardthecloseofhissermonthedearolddoctorbecameveryimpressive。HerecitedthestoryofLucknow，andthenspokeinsubstanceasfollows:"Soto—day，myyoungfriends，Isoundinyourearstheslo—o—o—brochofsalvation。"Thealliterationevidentlypleasedhim，andherepeateditwithmoreandmoreemphasisinhisperoration。Whenhesatdownanotherclergymanwhowaswithhimatthesacreddeskremindedhimofhismistake，whereuponthegoodolddoctorroseandaddressedthestudentsasfollows:"Myyoungfriends，youdoubtlessnoticedamistakeinmyfinalremarks。Isaid’slo—o—o—o—broch’;ofcourseImeant’pi—i—g—a—a—an。’"