shallprayforhim。But，ah，Iknowhowlittleprayersavailtoavertthesecruelbereavements。"Shewasyoung，butoldenoughtohaveprayedhardforhersickmother'slife，and，liketherestofus，prayedinvain。Atthisremembrancethetearsranundisguiseddownhercheeks。
　　Theopensympathyofonesoyoungandbeautiful，andwithalratherreserved，madeLordUxmoorgulp，and，nottobreakdownbeforethemall，heblurtedoutthathemustgoandpack:withthishehurriedaway。
　　Hewasunhappy。Besidesthecalamityhedreaded，itwasgrievoustobetornawayfromawomanhelovedatfirstsight，andjustwhenshehadcomeoutsoworthyofhislove:shewasahigh-mindedcreature；shehadbeensilentandreservedsolongastheconversationwastrivial；but，whentroublecame，shewastheonetospeaktohimbravelyandkindly。
　　Well，whatmustbe，must。Allthisranthroughhismind，andmadehimsigh；butitneveroccurredtohimtoshirk——totelegraphinsteadofgoing——noryettovaluehimselfonhisself-denial。
　　Theydidnotseehimagaintillhewasonthepointofgoing，andthenhetookleaveofthemall，Zoelast。Whenhecametoher，heignoredtheothers，exceptthatheloweredhisvoiceinspeakingtoher。"Godblessyouforyourkindness，MissVizard。Itisalittleharduponafellowtohavetorunawayfromsuchanacquaintance，justwhenIhavebeensofortunateastomakeit。"
　　"Oh，LordUxmoor，"saidZoe，innocently，"nevermindthat。Why，weliveinthesamecounty，andweareonthewayhome。AllIthinkofisyourpoorfriend；anddopleasetelegraph——toHarrington。"
　　Hepromisedhewould，andwentawaydisappointedsomehowatherlastwords。
　　Whenhewasgone，Severnewentoutonthebalconytosmoke，andHarringtonheldacouncilwiththeyoungladies。"Well，now，"saidhe，"aboutthistriptothelake。"
　　"Ishallnotgo，forone，"saidZoe，resolutely。
　　"La!"saidFanny，lookingcarefullyawayfromhertoHarrington；"andshewastheonethatinsisted。"
　　ZoeignoredthespeakerandsetherfacestifflytowardHarrington。"Sheonly_said_thatto_him。"_
　　_Fanny。_"But，unfortunately，earsarenotconfinedtothenoble。"
　　_Zoe。_"Nortonguestothediscreet。"
　　BoththeseremarkswereaddressedpointedlytoHarrington。
　　"Halloo!"saidhe，lookingfromoneflaminggirltotheother；"amItobeashuttlecock，andyourdiscreettonguesthebattledoors?Whatisup?"
　　"Wedon'tspeak，"saidthefrankZoe；"thatisup。"
　　"Why，whatistherow?"'
　　"Nomatter"stiffly。
　　"Nogreatmatter，I'llbebound。'Toll，tollthebell。'Heregoesonemoreimmortalfriendship——quenchedineternalsilence。"
　　Bothladiesbridled。Neitherspoke。
　　"Anddeadsilence，asladiesunderstandit，consistsinspeaking_at_oneanotherinsteadof_to。"_
　　Noreply。
　　"Thatiswell-bredtaciturnity。"
　　Noanswer。
　　"Thedignifiedreservethatdistinguishesanestrangementfromasquabble。"
　　Noreply。
　　"Well，Iadmirepermanentsentiments，goodorbad；constantresolves，etc。Yourfriendshiphasnotprovedimmortal；so，nowletusseehowlongyoucanholdspite——SIEVES!"Thenheaffectedtostart。"Whatisthis?I
　　spyarationalcreatureoutonyonderbalcony。Ihastentojoinhim。
　　'Birdsofafeather，youknow；"andwiththathewentouttohisfavorite，'andneverlookedbehindhim。
　　Theyoungladies，indignantatthecontemptthebigmanhadpresumedtocastupontheconstantsoulofwoman，turnedtworedfacesandfoursparklingeyestoeachother，withtheinstinctivesympathyofthejointlyinjured；butrememberingintime，turnedsharplyroundagain，andpresentednapes，andsosatsullen。
　　By-and-byachillingthoughtfelluponthembothatthesamemomentoftime。Themenweregoodfriendsasusual，safe，bysex，fromtiffs，andcoulddowithoutthem；andadulldayimpendedoverthehostilefair。
　　ThereupontheingeniousFannyresolvedtomakeasplashofsomesortanddisturbstagnation。Shesuddenlycriedout，"La!andthemanisgoneaway:sowhatistheuse?"Thisremarkshewascarefultolevelatbarespace。
　　Zoe，addressingthesameperson——space，towit——inquiredofhimifanybodyinhispartsknewtowhomthisyoungladywasaddressingherself。
　　"Toagirlthatistoosensiblenottoseethefollyofquarrelingaboutaman——_whenheisgone，"_saidFanny。
　　"Ifitismeyoumean，"saidZoestiffly，_"really_Iam_surprised。_Youforgetweareatdaggersdrawn。"
　　"No，Idon't，dear；andpartedforever。"
　　Zoesmiledatthatagainstherwill。
　　"Zoe!"penitentially。
　　"Frances!"archly。
　　"Comecuddlemequick!"
　　Zoewasallroundherneckinamoment，likealacescarf，andtherewasviolentkissing，withatearortwo。
　　Thentheyputanarmroundeachother'swaist，andwentallaboutthepremisesintertwinedlikesnakes；andZoegaveFannyhercameobrooch，theonewiththepearlsroundit。
　　ThepersontowhomVizardfledfromthetongueofbeautywasadelightfultalker:hereadtwoorthreenewspaperseveryday，andrecollectedthebestthings。Now，itisnoteverybodycanrememberathousanddisconnectedfactsandrecallthemapropos。Hewasvarious，fluent，and，aboveall，superficial；andsuchareyourbestconversers。Theyhavesomethinggoodandstrictlyephemeraltosayoneverything，anddon'tknowenoughofanythingtoimpaletheirhearers。InmyyouththeretalkedinPallMallagentlemanknownas"ConversationSharpe。"Heeclipsedeverybody。EvenMacaulaypaled。Sharpetalkedalltheblessedafternoon，andgravemenlistened，enchanted；and，ofallhesaid，nothingstuck。
　　WherebenowyourSharpiana?Thelearnedmaybecomparedtomines。ThesedesultorycharmersaremoreliketheornamentalcottagenearStaines，fortyorfiftyrooms，andthewholestructureonestoryhigh。Themineteemswithsolidwealth；butyoumustgropeandtroubletocometoit:itiseasierandpleasantertorunaboutthecottagewithalotofrooms。
　　allontheground-floor。
　　Themindandbodybothgetintohabits——sometimesapart，sometimesinconjunction。Nowadaysweseatthebodytoworktheintellect，eveninitslowerformofmechanicallabor:itisyourclodthattoddlesaboutlaboring。ThePeripateticsdidnotendure:theirmethodwasnotsuitedtoman'smicrocosm。Bodilymovementsfrittermentalattention。We_sit_atthefeetofGamaliel，or，assomecallhim，Tyndal；andwesittoBaconandAdamSmith。But，whenwearestandingorwalking，welovetotakebrainseasy。Ifthisdelightfulchatterboxhadbeentakendownshorthandandprinted，andVizardhadbeensetdowntoSeverniOpuscula，tenvolumes——and，mindyou，Severnehadtalkedalltenbythistime——theBarfordshiresquireandoldOxonianwouldhavecriedoutfor"morematterwithlessart，"andperhapshaveevenfledforrelieftosomeshortertreatise——Bacon's"Essays，"Browne's"ReligioMedici，"orBuckle's"Civilization。"Butlounginginabalcony，andlazilybreathingacloud，hecouldhavelistenedalldaytohisdesultory，delightfulfriend，overflowingwithlittlequestions，littleanswers，littlequeries，littleepigrams，littlemaxims_'alaRochefoucauld，_littlehistories，littleanecdotes，littlegossip，andlittlesnapshotsateveryfeatherflying。
　　"Quicquidagunthomines，votum，timor，ira，voluptas，Gaudia，discursus，nostrifarragoSeverni。"
　　But，alas!afteranhouroftouch-and-go，ofsuperficialityandsoftdelight，thedesultorycharmerfellonasubjecthehadstudied。Sothenheboredhiscompanionforthefirsttimeinallthetour。
　　But，totellthehonesttruth，Mr。Severnehadhithertobeenpleasinghisfriendwithacold-bloodedpurpose。Hispreliminarygossip，thatmadethetimeflysoagreeably，wasintendedtooilthewaytolubricatethepassageofapremeditatedpill。AssoonashehadgotVizardintoperfectgoodhumor，hesaid，aproposofnothingthathadpassed，"By-the-by，oldfellow，thatfivehundredpoundsyoupromisedtolendme!"
　　Vizardwasstartledbythissuddenturnofaconversation，hithertoagreeable。
　　"Why，youhavehadthreehundredandlostit，"saidhe。"Now，takemyadvice，anddon'tloseanymore。"
　　"Idon'tmeanto。ButIamdeterminedtowinbackthethreehundred，andagreatdealmore，beforeIleavethis。Ihavediscoveredasystem，aninfallibleone。"
　　"Iamsorrytohearit，"saidHarrington，gravely。"Thatisthesecondstepontheroadtoruin；thegamblerwithasystemistheconfirmedmaniac。"
　　"What!because_other_systemshavebeentried，andprovedtobefalse?
　　Mineisuntried，anditismereprejudicetocondemnitunheard。"
　　"Propoundit，then，"saidVizard。"Onlypleaseobservethebankhasgotitssystem；youforgetthat:andthebank'ssystemistotakeapositiveadvantage，whichmustwininthelongrun；therefore，allcounter-systemsmustloseinthelongrun。"
　　"Butthebankistiedtoalongrun，theindividualplayerisnot。"
　　ThisreplycheckedVizardforamomentandtheotherfolloweduphisadvantage。"Now，Vizard，bereasonable。Whatwouldthetriflingadvantagethebankderivesfromanincident，whichoccursonlyonceintwenty-eightdeals，availagainstaplayerwhocouldforeseeatanygivendealwhetherthecardthatwasgoingtocomeupthenearestthirtywouldbeontheredorblack?"
　　"Noavailatall。GodAlmightycouldbreakthebankeveryafternoon。
　　_Apre's?_aswesayinFrance。Doyoupretendtoomniscience?"
　　"Notexactly。"
　　"Well，butprescienceofisolatedevents，precededbyno_indicia，_
　　belongsonlytoomniscience。DidtheynotteachyouthatmuchatOxford?"
　　"TheytaughtmeverylittleatOxford。"
　　"Faultoftheplace，eh?Youtaught_them_something，though；andthepresentconversationremindsmeofit。Inyoursecondterm，wheneveryothermanisstillquizzedandkeptdownasafreshman，you，werealreadyaleader；achiefofmisrule。Youfoundedawhist-clubinTrinity，theprimmestcollegeofall。TheDonsrootedyououtincollege；butyoudidnotsuccumb；youfulfilledthesayingofSydneySmith，that'Cribbageshouldbeplayedincaverns，andsixpenny-whistinthehowlingwilderness。'Ha!ha!howwellIrememberridingacrossBullingtonGreenonefineafternoon，andfindingfourOxfordhackshalteredinarow，andthefourundergraduatesthathadhiredthemonlongtick，sittingcross-leggedunderthehedgelikeTurksortailors，roundarudetablewiththelegssaweddowntostumps。Youhadtwopacks，andaportableinkstand，andweresohardatitthatIputmymare'snoserightoverthequartetbeforeyousaweitherherorme。Thathedgewaslikeadriftofodoriferoussnowthehawthornbloom，andprimrosessparkledonitsbankliketopazes。Thebirdschirruped，theskysmiled，thesunburnedperfumes；andtheresatmylordandhisfellow-maniacs，snick-snack——pit-pat——cutting，dealing，playing，revoking，scoring，andexchangingI。O。U。'snotworththepaper。"
　　"Alltrue，buttherevoking，"saidSeverne，merrily。"Monster!bythememoryofthoseyouthfuldays，Idemandafairhearing。"Then，gravely，"Hangitall，Vizard，Iamnotafellowthatisalwaysintrudinghisaffairsandhistheoriesuponothermen。"
　　"No，no，no，"saidVizard，hastily，andhalfapologetically；"goon。"
　　"Well，then，ofcourseIdon'tpretendtoforeknowledge；butIdotoexperience，andyouknowexperienceteachesthewise。"
　　"Nottoflingfivehundredafterthree。There——Ibegpardon。Proceed，instructorofyouth。"
　　"Dolisten，then:experienceteachesusthatluckhasitslaws；andI
　　buildmysystemononeofthem。Iftwooppositeaccidentsaresuretohappenequallyofteninatotaloffiftytimes，people，whohavenotobserved，expectthemtohappenturnabout，andbetaccordingly。Buttheydon'thappenturnabout；theymakeshortruns，andsometimeslongones。
　　Theypositivelyavoidalternation。Haveyounotobservedthisat_trenteetquarante?"_
　　"No。"
　　"Thenyouhavenotwatchedthecards。"
　　"Notmuch。Thefacesofthegamblerswerealwaysmystudy。Theyareinstructive。"
　　"Well，then，I'llgiveyouanexampleoutside——fortheprinciplerunsthroughallequalchances——taketheuniversityboat-race:youhavekeptyoureyeonthat?"
　　"Rather。Nevermissedoneyet。ComeallthewayfromBarfordshiretoseeit。"
　　"Well，there'sanexample。"
　　"Ofchance?No，thankyou。Thatgoesbystrength，skill，wind，endurance，chasteliving，self-denial，andjudicioustraining。Everywinningboatismannedbyvirtues。"Hiseyeflashed，andhewasasearnestallinamomentashehadbeenlistless。Acontinentalcynichaddubbedthisinsularcynicmad。
　　Theprofessorofchancessmiledsuperior。"Thosethingsdecideeachindividualrace，andthebestmenwin，becauseithappenstobetheonlyracethatisneversold。Butgofurtherback，andyoufinditischance。
　　ItispurechancethatsendsthebestmenuptoCambridgetwoorthreeyearsrunning，andthentoOxford。Withthiskey，takethefactsmysystemrestson。Therearetwo。Thefirstisthatinthirtyandoddracesandmatches，theuniversityluckhascomeoutequalontheriverandatLord's:thesecondis，theluckhasseldomalternated。Idon'tsay，never。Butlookatthelistofevents；itispublishedeveryMarch。Youmayseetherethegreattruththatevenchancesshundirectalternation。
　　Inthis，properlyworked，liesafortuneatHomburg，wheretheplayissquare。Redgainsonce；youbackrednexttime，andstop。Youareonblack，andwin；youdouble。Thisisthegame，ifyouhaveonlyafewpounds。Butwithfivehundredpoundsyoucandoublemorecourageously，andworktheshortrunhard；andthatishowlossesareavertedandgainssecured。OnceatWiesbadenIcaughtacroupier，outonaholiday。ItwasGood-Friday，youknow。Igavehimastunningdinner。Hewascloseaswax，atfirst——thatmightbethesaltfish；butafterthe_rognons'alabrochette，_andabottleofchampagne，heletout。Irememberonethinghesaid:Monsieur，cequefaitlafortunedelabanquecen'estpaslepetitavantagequ'elletiredurefait——quoiquecelayestpourquelquechose——c'estlate'me'rite'deceuxquiperdent，etlatimidite'
　　deceuxquigagnent。'"
　　"And，"saysVizard，"thereisaFrenchproverbfoundedon_experience:_
　　"C'estencorerougequiperd，Etencorenoir。Maistoujoursblancquigagne。'"
　　Severne，forthefirsttime，lookedangryandmortified；heturnedhisbackandwassilent。Vizardlookedathimuneasily，hesitatedamoment，thenflungtheremainderofhiscigarawayandseemedtorousehimselfbodyandsoul。Hesquaredhisshoulders，asifheweregoingtoboxtheDemonofplayforhisfriend，andheletoutgoodsenserightandleft，and，indeed，wasalmostbetrayedintoeloquence。"What!"hecried，"you，whoaresobrightandkeenandknowingineverythingelse，areyoureallysoblindedbyegotismandcredulityastobelievethatyoucaninventanymethodofbettingat_rougeetnoir_thathasnotbeentriedbeforeyouwereborn?DoyourememberthefirstwordinLaBruy'ere'sfamouswork?"
　　"No，"saidNed，sulkily。"Readnothingbutnewspapers。"
　　"Goodlad。Savesadealoftrouble。Well，hebegins'Toutestdit'——'everythinghasbeensaid；'andIsaythat，inyourbusiness，'Toutestfait'——'everythinghasbeendone。'Everymovehasbeentriedbeforeyouexisted，andtheresultofallisthattobetagainstthebank，wildlyorsystematically，istogambleagainstarock。_Simonumentaquoeris，circumspice。_Useyoureyes，man。LookattheKursaal，itsluxuries，itsgardens，itsgilding，itsattractions，allofthemcheap，excepttheonethatpaysforall；allthesedelights，andtherents，andthecroupiers，andtheservants，andtheincomeandliveriesofanunprincipledprince，whowouldotherwisebeapoorbuthonestgentlemanwithone_bonne，_insteadofthirtyblazinglackeys，allcomefromthegainsofthebank，whicharethelossesoftheplayers，especiallyofthosethathavegotasystem。"
　　Severneshotin，"Abankwasbrokenlastweek。"
　　"Wasit?Thenallitlosthasreturnedtoit，orwillreturntoitto-night；forgamblersknownodayofrest。"
　　"Oh，yes，theydo。ItisshutonGood-Friday。"
　　"Yousurpriseme。Onlythreehundredandsixty-fourdaysintheyear!
　　BrainlessavariceismorereasonablethanIthought。Severne，yoursisaveryseriouscase。Youhavereducedyourincome，thatisclear；foranEnglishgentlemandoesnotstayyearsandyearsabroadunlesshehasoutruntheconstable；andIfeelsuregamblinghasdoneit。Youhadthefeverfromaboy。BullingtonGreen!'Asthetwig'sbentthetree'sinclined。'Come，come，makeastand。Wearefriends。Letushelponeanotheragainstourbesettingfoibles。Letuspracticeantiquewisdom；
　　letus'knowourselves，'andleaveHomburgto-morrow，insteadofTuesday。"
　　Severnelookedsullen，butsaidnothing；thenVizardgavehimtoohastilycreditforsomeofthatsterlingfriendship，borderingonlove，whichwarmedhisownfaithfulbreast:underthisdelusionhemadeanextraordinaryeffort；heusedanargumentwhich，withhimself，wouldhavebeenirresistible。"Lookhere，"saidhe，"I'll——won'tyouhaveacigar?——there；nowI'lltellyousomething:Ihaveamaniaasbadasyours；onlymineisintermittent，thankHeaven!I'mtoldamillionwomenareasgood，orbetter，thanamillionmen。Itmaybeso。ButwhenI，anindividual，stakemyheartonlovelywoman，shealwaysturnsoutunworthy。Withme，thesexavoidsalternation。ThereforeIrailonitwholesale。Itisnotphilosophical；butIdon'tdoittoinstructmankind；itistosoothemyspleen。Well——wouldyoubelieveit?——onceineverythreeyears，inspiteofmyexperience，Iamalwaysbittenagain。
　　Aftermylucidintervalhasexpired，Ifallinwithsomewoman，whoseemsnotliketherest，butanangel。ThenI，thoughI'maversetothesex，fallaneasy，animmediatevictimtotheindividual。"
　　"Loveatfirstsight。"
　　"Notabitofit。Ifsheisasbeautifulasanangel，withthevoiceofapeacockoraguinea-hen——and，luckilyforme，thatisafrequentarrangement——sheisnomoretomethanthefire-shovel。Ifshehasasweetvoiceandpaleeyes，I'msafe。Indeed，IamsafeagainstJuno，Venus，andMinervafortwoyearsandseveralmonthsafterthelast；butwhentwoeventscoincide，whenmytimeisup，andthelovely，melodiousfemalecomes，thenIamlost。BeforeIhaveseenherandheardherfiveminutes，Iknowmyfate，andIneverresistit。Inevercan；thatisacuriouspartofthemania。Thencommencesalittledrama，alltheactsofwhicharestalecopies；yeteachtimetheytakemebysurprise，asiftheywerenew。Inspiteofpastexperience，Ibeginallconfidenceandtrust:by-and-bycomethesubtlebutwell-knownsignsofdeceit；sodoubtisforcedonme；andthenIamallsuspicion，andsodarklyvigilantthatsoonalliscertainty；for'lesfourberiesdesfemmes'arediabolicallysubtle，butmonotonous。Theyseemtovaryonlyonthesurface。Onelookstoogentleandsweettogiveanycreaturepain；Icherishherlikeatenderplant；shedeceivesmeforthecoarsestfellowshecanfind。
　　Anothercomesthefrankandcandiddodge；sheissooff-handedsheshowsmeitisnotworthherwhiletobetray。Shedeceivesme，liketheother，andwithaslittlediscrimination。Thenexthasafaceofbeaminginnocence，andalimpideyethatlooksliketransparentcandor；shegazeslongandcalmlyinmyface，asifhereyelovedtodwellonme，gazeswiththeeyeofagazelleorayounghare，andthebabylipsbelowoutliethehoariestmalefoxintheOldJewry。But，tocompletethedelusion，allmysweetheartsandwivesareromanticandpoeticalskin-deep——ortheywouldnotattractme——andallturnoutvulgartothecore。Bytheirloversalonecanyoueverknowthem。Bythementheycan'tlove，andthementheydolove，youfindthesecreaturesthatimitatesentimentsodivinelyarehard，prosaic，vulgarlittlethings，thinlygiltanddoublevarnished。"
　　"Theyaremuchbetterthanweare；butyoudon'tknowhowtotakethem，"
　　saidSeverne，withthecalmsuperiorityofsuccess。
　　"No，"repliedVizard，dryly，"cursemeifIdo。Well，IdidhopeIhadoutgrownmymania，asIhavedonethetoothache；forthistimeIhadpassedthefatalperiod，thethreeyears。ItisnearlyfouryearsnowsinceIwentthroughtheestablishedprocess——asfixedbeforehandasthedyer'sorthecotton-weaver's——adoredher，trustedherblindly，suspectedher，watchedher，detectedher，lefther。By-the-by，shewasmywife，thelast；butthatmadenodifference；shewasneitherbetternorworsethantherest，andhermethodsandidioticmotivesofdeceitidentical。Well，Ned，Iwasmistaken。YesterdaynightImetmyFateoncemore。"
　　"Where?InFrankfort?"
　　"No:atHomburg；attheopera。Youmustgivemeyourwordnottotellasoul。"
　　"Ipledgeyoumywordofhonor。"
　　"Well，theladywhosungthepartofSiebel。"
　　"Siebel?"mutteredSeverne。
　　"Yes，"saidVizard，dejectedly。
　　Severnefixedhiseyesonhisfriendwithastrangeexpressionofconfusionandcuriosity，asifhecouldnottakeitallin。Buthesaidnothing，onlylookedveryhardallthetime。
　　Vizardburstout，"'Omiseraehominummentes，Opectoracaeca!'ThereI
　　sat，inthestalls，ahappymancomparatively，becausemyheart，thoughfullofscars，wasatpeace，andmyreason，afterperiodicalabdications，hadresumeditsthrone，forgood；soI，weakmortal，fancied。Siebelappeared；tall，easy，dignified，andwalkinglikeawave；modest，fair，noble，great，dreamy，and，aboveall，divinelysad；thesoulofwomanhoodandmusicpouredfromherhoneylips；sheconqueredallmysenses:Ifeltsomethinglikeaboltoficerundownmyback。Ioughttohavejumpedupandfledthetheater。IwishIhad。ButIneverdo。Iamincurable。Thecharmdeepened；andwhenshehadsung'LeParlated'Amor'asnomortaleversungandlookedit，sheleftthestageandcarriedmyheartandsoulawaywithher。WhatchancehadI?Hereshoneallthebeautiesthatadornthebody，allthevirtuesandgracesthatembellishthesoul；theywereweddedtopoetryandravishingmusic，andgaveandtookenchantment。I
　　sawmyparagonglideaway，likeagoddess，pastthescenery，andIdidnotseehermeetherloveratthenextstep——afellowwithawash-leatherface，greasylocksinasausageroll，andhishairshavedoffhisforehead——andsnatchapotofporterfromhishands，anddrainittothedregs，andsay，'Itisallright，Harry:_that_fetched'em。'ButIknow，byexperience，shedid；so_sauvequipeut。_Dearfriendandfellow-lunatic，formysakeandyours，leaveFrankfortwithmeto-morrow。"
　　Severnehunghishead，andthoughthard。Herewasanewandwonderfulturn。Hefeltallmannerofstrangethings——apangofjealousy，forone。
　　Hefeltthat，oneveryaccount，itwouldbewisetogo，and，indeed，dangeroustostay。Butamaniaisamania，andsohecouldnot。"Lookhere，oldfellow，"hesaid，"iftheoperawereonto-morrow，Iwouldleavemythreehundredbehindmeandsacrificemyselftoyou，soonerthanexposeyoutothefascinationsofsocaptivatingawomanasInaKlosking。"
　　"InaKlosking?Isthathername?Howdo_you_know?"
　　"I——I——fancyIheardso。"
　　"Why，shewasnotannounced。InaKlosking!Itisasweetname；"andhesighed。
　　"Butyouarequitesafefromherforoneday，"continuedSeverne，"soyoumustbereasonable。Iwillgowithyou，Tuesday，asearlyasyoulike；
　　butdobeagoodfellow，andletmehavethefivehundred，totrymysystemwithto-morrow。"
　　Vizardlookedsad，andmadenoreply。
　　Severnegotimpatient。"Why，whatisittoarichfellowlikeyou?IfI
　　hadtwelvethousandacresinaringfence，nofriendwouldaskmetwiceforsuchatriflingsum。"
　　Vizard，forthefirsttime，woreasupercilioussmileatbeingsomisunderstood，anddidnotdeignareply。
　　Severnewentonmistakinghisman:"Icangiveyoubillsforthemoney，andforthethreehundredyoudidlendme。"
　　Vizarddidnotreceivethisasexpected。"Bills?"saidhe，gravely。
　　"What，doyoudothatsortofthingaswell?"
　　"Whynot，pray?SolongasI'mtheholder，notthedrawer，northeacceptor。Besides，theyarenotaccommodationbills，butgoodcommercialpaper。"
　　"Youareamerchant，then；areyou?"
　　"Yes；inasmallway。Ifyouwillallowme，Iwillexplain。"
　　Hedidso；and，tosavecomments，yetenablethereadertoappreciatehisexplanation，thetruepartofitisprintedinitalics，themendaciousportioninordinarytype。
　　_"MyestateinHuntingdonshireisnotverylarge；andtherearemortgagesonit，_forthebenefitofothermembersofmyfamily。Iwasalwaysdesiroustopayoffthesemortgages；andtookthebestadviceIcould。_I
　　havegotanuncle:_helivesinthecity。Heputmeontoagoodthing。I
　　boughtashareinatradingvessel；shemakesshorttrips，andturnshercargooften。ShewilltakeoutpapertoAmerica，andbringbackrawcotton:shewilllandthatatLiverpool，andshipEnglishhardwareandcottonfabricsfortheMediterraneanandGreece，andbringbackcurrantsfromZanteandlemonsfromPortugal。Shegoesforthenimbleshilling。
　　Well，youknowshipswearout:_andifyouvarnishthemrotten，andinsurethemhigh，andtheygotoglory，Mr。Plimsollisdownonyoulikeahammer。_So，whenshehadpaidmypurchase-moneythreetimesover，somefellowsinthecitymadeanofferfor_TheRover_——thatwashername。Mysharecametotwelvehundred，andmyunclesaidIwastotakeit。_NowI
　　alwaysfeelboundbywhathedecides。_Theygavemefourbills，forfourhundred，threehundred，threehundred，andtwohundred。Thefourhundredwaspaidatmaturity。_Theothersarenotdueyet。_IhaveonlytosendthemtoLondon，andIcangetthemoneybackbyThursday:butyouwantmetostartonTuesday。"
　　"Thatisenough，"saidVizard，wearily，"Iwillbeyourbanker，and——"
　　"Youareagoodfellow!"saidSevernewarmly。
　　"No，no；Iamaweakfellow，andaninjudiciousone。Butitistheoldstory:whenafriendasksyouwhathethinksafavor，therightthingistograntitatonce。Hedoesn'twantyouradvice；hewantstheonethingheasksfor。There，getmethebills，andI'lldrawacheckonMuller:
　　HerriesadvisedhimbySaturday'spost；sowecandrawonMonday。"
　　"Allright，oldman，"saidSeverne，andwentawaybrisklyforthebills。
　　Whenhegotfromthebalconyintotheroom，hisstepsflaggedalittle；
　　itstruckhimthatinktakestimetodry，andmoretimetodarken。
　　As_TheRover，_withhernimblecargoes，wasfirstcousinto_TheFlyingDutchman，_withhiscrewofghosts，sothebillsreceivedbySeverne，aspurchase-moneyforhisship，necessarilypartookofthatship'saerialcharacter。Indeedtheyexisted，astheschoolmenusedtosay，in_posse，_
　　butnotin_esse。_Tobelesspedanticandmoreexact，theyexistedasslipsofblankpaper，withaGovernmentstamp。Togivethemamercantilecharacterforatime——viz。，untilpresentedforpayment——theymustbedrawnbyanimaginaryship-owneroravisionarymerchant，andindorsedbyatleastoneshadow，andamanofstraw。
　　Themanofstrawsatdowntoinscribeselfandshadows，andbecameadishonestwriteroffiction；forthearthenowcommencedappearstofallshortofforgeryproper，buttobestillmoredistinctfromjustifiablefiction。TheingeniousMr。DeFoe'scertificatebyanaeialjusticeofthepeacetothetruthofhisghostlynarrativecomesnearesttoit，inmypoorreading。
　　Qualmshehad，butnotdeep。IfthebillsweredrawnbyImagination，acceptedbyFancy，andindorsedbyImpudence，whatdiditmattertoNedStraw，sincehissystemwouldenablehimtoredeemthematmaturity?Hisonlyrealconcernwastoconcealtheirrecentorigin。Sohewrotethemwithabroad-nibbedpen，thattheymightbetheblacker，andsetthemtodryinthesun。
　　Hethenproceededtoachangeoftoilet。
　　Whilethusemployed，therewasasharptapathisdoorandVizard'svoiceoutside。Severnestartedwithterror，snappedupthethreebillswiththedexterityofaconjurer——thehandleturned——heshovedthemintoadrawer——Vizardcamein——heshutthedrawer，andpanted。
　　VizardhadfollowedthecustomofOxoniansamongthemselves，whichistoknock，andthencomein，unlessforbidden。
　　"Come，"saidhe，cheerfully，"thosebills。I'minahurrytocashthemnow，andendtheonlydifferencewehaveeverhad，oldfellow。"
　　ThebloodleftSeverne'scheekandlipsforamoment，andhethoughtswiftlyandhard。Thebloodreturned，alongwithhisreadywit。"Howgoodyouare!"saidhe；"butno。ItisSunday。"
　　"Sunday!"ejaculatedVizard。"Whatisthattoyou，afellowwhohasbeenyearsabroad?"
　　"Ican'thelpit，"saidSeverne，apologetically。"Iamsuperstitious——don'tliketodobusinessonaSunday。IwouldnotevenshuntatthetablesonaSunday——Idon'tthink。"
　　"Ah，youarenotquitesureofthat。There_is_alimittoyoursuperstition!Well，willyoulistentoastoryonaSunday?"
　　"Rather!"
　　"Then，onceonatimetherewasaScotchfarmerwhohadabonnycow；andanotherfarmercovetedherhonestly。OneSundaytheywenthometogetherfromkirkandtherewasthecowgrazing。FarmerTwostopped，eyedher，andsaidtoFarmerOne，'GienitwereMonday，asitistheSabba'day，whatwouldyetak'foryourcoow?'Theothersaidthepricewouldbeninepounds，_ifitwereMonday。_AndsotheykepttheSabbath；andthecowchangedhands，though，tothenakedeye，shegrazedon_insitu。_Ournegotiationisjustascomplete。Sowhatdoesitmatterwhethertheactualexchangeofbillsandcashtakesplaceto-dayorto-morrow?"
　　"Doyoureallymeantosayitdoesnotmattertoyou?"askedSeverne。
　　"Notonestraw。"
　　"Then，asitdoesnotmattertoyou，anddoestome，givememyfoolishway，likeadeargoodfellow。"
　　"Now，thatissmart，"saidVizard——"verysmart；"then，withalookofparentaladmiration，"hegetshisownwayineverything。He_will_haveyourmoney——he_won't_haveyourmoney。Iwonderwhetherhe_will_
　　consenttowalkthosegirlsout，anddisburdenmeoftheirtooprofitablediscourse。"
　　"ThatIwill，withpleasure。"
　　"Well，theyareatluncheon——withtheirbonnetson。"
　　"Iwilljointheminfiveminutes。"
　　Afterluncheon，MissVizard，MissDover，andMr。Severnestartedforastroll。
　　MissMaitlandsuggestedthatVizardshouldaccompanythem。
　　"Couldn'tthinkofdesertingyou，"saidhedryly。
　　Theyoungladiesgiggled，becausethesetworarelyopenedtheirmouthstoagree，onebeingaprofessedwoman-hater，andtheotheraman-hater，inwords。
　　SaysMisander，inasourishway，"Sinceyouvaluemyconversationso，perhapsyouwillbegoodenoughnottosmokeforthenexttenminutes。"
　　Misogynconsented，butsighed。Thatsighwentunpitied，andtheladywastednotime。
　　"Doyouseewhatisgoingonbetweenyoursisterandthatyoungman?"
　　"Yes；alittleflirtation。"
　　"Agreatdealmorethanthat。Icaughtthem，inthisveryroom，makinglove。"
　　"Youalarmme，"saidVizard，withmarkedtranquillity。
　　"Isawhim——kiss——her——hand。"
　　"Yourelieveme，"saidVizard，ascalmlyashehadbeenalarmed。"There'snoharminthat。I'vekissedthequeen'shand，andthenationdidnotriseuponme。However，Iobjecttoit。Thesuperiorsexshouldnotplaythespaniel。Iwilltellhimtodropthat。But，permitmetosay，allthisisinyourdepartment，notmine。
　　"ButwhatcanIdoagainstthreeofthem，unlessyousupportme?Thereyouhaveletthemgoouttogether。"
　　"TogetherwithFannyDover，youmean?"
　　"Yes；andifFannyhadanydesignsonhim，Zoewouldbesafe——"
　　"AndpoorNedtornintwo。"
　　"ButFanny，Iamgrievedtosay，seemsinclinedtoassistthisyoungmanwithZoe；thatis，becauseitdoesnotmattertoher。Shehasotherviews——seriousones。"
　　"Serious!What?Anunnery?ThenIpitymyladyabbess。"
　　"Herviewsareplainenoughtoanybodybutyou。"
　　"Arethey?Thenmakemeaswiseasmyneighbors。"
　　"Well，then，shemeanstomarry_you。"_
　　"What!Oh，come!——thatistoogoodajoke!"
　　"Itissoberearnest。AskZoe——askyourfriend，Mr。Severne——askthechambermaids——askanycreaturewithaneyeinitshead。Oh，theblindnessofyoumen!"
　　TheMisogynwasstruckdumb。Whenherecovered，itwastorepineatthelotofman。
　　"Evenmyownfamiliarcousin——onceremoved——inwhomItrusted!IdeputeyoutoinformherthatIthinkher_adorable，_andthatmatrimonyisnolongerahabitofmine。SetherontopoorSeverne；heisaladies'man，and'themorethemerrier'ishiscreed。"
　　"SuchagirlasFannyisnottobedivertedfromapurposeofthatsort。
　　Besides，shehastoomuchsensetoplungeintotheSeverneand——pauperism!Sheisbentonarichhusband，notaneedyadventurer。"
　　"Madam，inmyfriend'sname，Ithankyou。"
　　"Youareverywelcome，sir——itisonlythetruth。"Then，withaswiftreturntoheroriginaltopic:"No；IknowperfectlywellwhatFannyDoverwilldothisafternoon。Shesketches。"
　　"Itistootrue，"saidVizarddolefully:"showedmeashipinfullsail，andIpraisedit_inmyway。_Isaid，'Thatrockisratherwelldone。'"
　　"Well，shewillbeseizedwithadesiretosketch。Shewillsitdownapart，andsay，'Pleasedon'twatchme——itmakesmenervous。'Theothertwowilltakethehintandmakeloveagoodwayoff；andZoewillgogreaterlengths，withanotherwomaninsight——butonlyjustinsight，andslylyencouragingher——thanifshewerequitealonewithher_mauvaissujet。"_
　　Vizardwaspleasedwiththeoldlady。"Thisissagacious，"saidhe，"andshowsaneyefordetail。Irecognizeinyourpicturethefoxysex。But，atthismoment，whocanforetellwhichwaythewindwillblow?Youarenotaware，perhaps，thatZoeandFannyhavehadaquarrel。Theydon'tspeak。Now，inwomen，youknow，vicesarecontrolledbyvices——seePope。
　　Theconspiracyyoudreadwillbeavertedbytheotherfaultsoftheircharacter，theirjealousyandtheirpetulanttempers。Takemywordforit，theyaresparringatthismoment；andthatpoor，sillySevernemeditatingandmoderating，andgettingscratchedonbothsidesfortryingtobejust。"
　　Atthismomentthedooropened，andFannyDoverglitteredonthethresholdinCambridgeblue。
　　"There，"saidVizard；"didnotItellyou?Theyarecomehome。"
　　"Onlyme，"saidFannygayly。
　　"Wherearetheothers?"inquiredMissMaitlandsharply。
　　"Notfaroff——onlybytheriverside。"
　　"Andyouleftthosetwoalone!"
　　"Now，don'tbecross，aunt，"criedFanny，andlimpeduptoher。"ThesenewbootsaresotightthatIreallycouldn'tbearthemanylonger。I
　　believeIshallbelame，asitis。"
　　"Yououghttobeashamedofyourself。Whatwillthepeoplesay?"
　　"La!aunt，itisabroad。Onedoeswhatonelikes——outofEngland。"
　　"Here'sacodeofmorals!"saidVizard，whomusthavehisslap。
　　"Nonsense，"saidMissMaitland:"shewillbesuretomeetsomebody。AllEnglandisontheRhineatthistimeoftheyear；and，whetherorno，isitforyoutoexposethatchildtofamiliaritywithapersonnobodyknows，norhisfamilyeither?Youaretwenty-fiveyearsold；youknowtheworld；youhaveaspooranopinionofthemanasIhave，oryouwouldhavesetyourowncapathim——youknowyouwould——andyouhaveletoutthingstomewhenyouwereoffyourguard。FannyDover，youarebehavingwickedly；youareafalsefriendtothatpoorgirl。"
　　Uponthis，lo!thepertFanny，hithertosoreadywithheranswers，begantocrybitterly。Thewordsreallyprickedherconscience，andtobescoldedisonething，tobeseverelyandsolemnlyreproachedisanother；
　　andbeforeaman!
　　Theofficialwoman-haterwasmeltedinamomentbythesaucygirl'stears。"There——there，"saidhe，kindly，"havealittlemercy。Hangitall!Don'tmakeamountainofamole-hill。"
　　Theofficialman-haternevermovedamuscle。"Itisnousehercryingto_me:_shemustgivemea_proof_sheissorry。Fanny，ifyouarearespectablegirl，andhaveanyideaofbeingmyheir，goyouthismomentandbringthemhome。"
　　"Yes，aunt，"saidFanny，eagerly；andwentoffwithwonderfulalacrity。