首页 >出版文学> A Simpleton>第3章

第3章

  "Andaprettysubjectitis!"
  Dr。StainestheninvitedMr。Lusignantohislodgings,andpromisedtoexplainthematteranatomically。"Meantime,"saidhe,"wouldyoubegoodenoughtoputyourhandstomywaist,asIdidtothepatient's。"
  Mr。Lusignancomplied;andthepatientbegantotitterdirectly,toputthemoutofcountenance。
  "PleaseobservewhattakesplacewhenIdrawafullbreath。
  "Nowapplythesametesttothepatient。Breatheyourbest,please,MissLusignan。"
  Thepatientputonafacefullofsaucymutiny。
  "Toobligeusboth。"
  "Oh,howtiresome!"
  "Iamawareitisratherlaborious,"saidStaines,alittledryly;
  "buttoobligeyourfather!"
  "Oh,anythingtoobligepapa,"saidshe,spitefully。"There!AndIdohopeitwillbethelast——la!no;Idon'thopethat,neither。"
  Dr。Stainespolitelyignoredherlittleattemptstointerrupttheargument。"Youfound,sir,thatthemusclesofmywaist,andmyintercostalribsthemselves,roseandfellwitheachinhalationandexhalationofairbythelungs。"
  "Idid;butmydaughter'swaistwaslikedeadwood,andsowereherlowerribs。"
  Atthisvolunteerstatement,Rosacoloredtohertemples。"Thanks,papa!PackmeofftoLondon,andsellmeforabigdoll!"
  "Inotherwords,"saidthelecturer,mildandpertinacious,"withusthelungshaveroomtoblow,andthewholebonyframeexpandselasticwiththem,likethewoodworkofablacksmith'sbellows;butwiththispatient,andmanyofhersex,thatnobleanddivinelyframedbellowsiscrippledandconfinedbyapowerfulmachineofhumanconstruction;soitworkslamelyandfeebly:consequentlytoolittleair,andofcoursetoolittleoxygen,passesthroughthatspongyorganwhoseverylifeisair。Nowmarkthespecialresultinthiscase:beingotherwisehealthyandvigorous,ourpatient'ssystemsendsintothelungsmorebloodthanthatonecrippledorgancandealwith;asmallquantitybecomesextravasatedatoddtimes;
  itaccumulates,andwouldbecomedangerous;thenNature,strengthenedbysleep,andbysomehours'relieffromthediabolicalengine,makesaneffortandflingsitoff:thatiswhythehemorrhagecomesinthemorning,andwhysheisthebetterforit,feelingneitherfaintnorsick,butrelievedofaweight。
  This,sir,istherationaleofthecomplaint;anditistoyouI
  mustlookforthecure。Tojudgefrommyotherfemalepatients,andfromthefewwordsMissLusignanhasletfall,Ifearwemustnotcountonanyveryheartyco-operationfromher:butyouareherfather,andhavegreatauthority;Iconjureyoutouseittothefull,asyouonceusedit——tomysorrow——inthisveryroom。Iamforgettingmycharacter。Iwasaskedhereonlyasherphysician。
  Good-evening。"
  Hegavealittlegulp,andhurriedaway,withanabruptnessthattouchedthefatherandoffendedthesapientdaughter。
  However,Mr。Lusignanfollowedhim,andstoppedhimbeforeheleftthehouse,andthankedhimwarmly;andtohissurprise,beggedhimtocallagaininadayortwo。
  "Well,Rosa,whatdoyousay?"
  "IsaythatIamveryunfortunateinmydoctors。Mr。Wymanisachatterboxandknowsnothing。Dr。SnellisMr。Wyman'secho。
  Christopherisagenius,andtheyarealwaysfullofcrotchets。A
  prettydoctor!Goneaway,andnotprescribedforme!"
  Mr。Lusignanadmitteditwasodd。"But,afterall,"saidhe,"ifmedicinedoesyounogood?"
  "Ah!butanymedicineHEhadprescribedwouldhavedonemegood,andthatmakesitalltheunkinder。"
  "Ifyouthinksohighlyofhisskill,whynottakehisadvice?Itcandonoharm。"
  "Noharm?Why,ifIwastoleavethemoffIshouldcatchadreadfulcold;andthatwouldbesuretosettleonmychest,andcarrymeoff,inmypresentdelicatestate。Besides,itissounfemininenottowearthem。"
  ThisstaggeredMr。Lusignan,andhewasafraidtopressthepoint;
  butwhatStaineshadsaidfermentedinhismind。
  Dr。SnellandMr。Wymancontinuedtheirvisitsandtheirprescriptions。
  Thepatientgotalittleworse。
  Mr。LusignanhopedChristopherwouldcallagain,buthedidnot。
  WhenDr。Staineshadsatisfiedhimselfthatthedisorderwaseasilycurable,thenwoundedpridefoundanentranceevenintohislovingheart。Thattwostrangersshouldhavebeenconsultedbeforehim!
  Hewasonlysentforbecausetheycouldnotcureher。
  Asheseemedinnohurrytorepeathisvisit,Mr。Lusignancalledonhim,andsaid,politely,hehadhopedtoreceiveanothercallerethis。"Personally,"saidhe,"Iwasmuchstruckwithyourobservations;butmydaughterisafraidshewillcatchcoldifsheleavesoffhercorset,andthat,youknow,mightbeveryserious。"
  Dr。Stainesgroaned,and,whenhehadgroaned,helectured。
  "Femalepatientsarewonderfullymonotonousinthismatter;theyhaveaprogrammeofevasions;andwhetherthepatientisaladyorahousemaid,sheseldomvariesfromthatprogramme。Youfindherbreathinglife'sairwithhalfabellows,andyoutellherso。
  'Oh,no,'saysshe;anddoesthegiganticfeatofcontractionwewitnessedthateveningatyourhouse。But,oninquiry,youlearnthereisarawredlineploughedinherfleshbythecruelstays。
  'Whatisthat?'youask,andflatteryourselfyouhavepinnedher。
  Notabit。'Thatwasthelastpair。Ichangedthem,becausetheyhurtme。'Drivenoutofthatbyproofsofrecentlaceration,theysay,'IfIleavethemoffIshouldcatchmydeathofcold,'whichisequivalenttosayingthereisnoflannelintheshops,nocommonsensenorneedlesathome。"
  HethenlaidbeforehimsomelargeFrenchplates,showingtheorgansofthehumantrunk,andbadehimobserveinhowsmallaspace,andwithwhatskill,theCreatorhaspackedsomanylargeyetdelicateorgans,sothattheyshouldbefreeandsecurefromfriction,thoughsoclosetoeachother。Heshowedhimtheliver,anorganweighingfourpounds,andoflargecircumference;thelungs,averylargeorgan,suspendedinthechestandimpatientofpressure;theheart,thestomach,thespleen,allofthemtoocloselyandartfullypackedtobearanyfurthercompression。
  Havingthustakenhimbytheeye,hetookhimbythemind。
  "IsitasmallthingforthecreaturetosaytoherCreator,'Icanpackallthisegg-chinabetterthanyoucan,'andthereupontojamallthosevitalorgansclose,byapowerful,averypowerfulandingeniousmachine?Isitasmallthingforthatsex,which,forgoodreasons,theOmniscienthasmadelargerinthewaistthanthemale,tosaytoherCreator,'Youdon'tknowyourbusiness;womenoughttobesmallerinthewaistthanmen,andshallbethroughoutthecivilizedworld'?"
  Inshort,hedeliveredsomanytrueandpointedthingsonthistritesubject,thattheoldgentlemanwasconvinced,andbeggedhimtocomeoverthatveryeveningandconvinceRosa。
  Dr。Stainesshookhisheaddolefully,andallhisfirediedoutofhimathavingtofacethefair。"Reasonwillbewasted。Authorityistheonlyweapon。Myprofessionandmyreadinghavebothtaughtmethatthewholecharacterofhersexundergoesachangethemomentamaninterfereswiththeirdress。FromChaucer'sdaytoourown,neitherpublicsatirenorprivateremonstrancehasevershakenanyoftheirmonstrousfashions。Easy,obliging,pliable,andweakerofwillthanmeninotherthings,dobuttouchtheirdress,howeverobjectionable,androckisnotharder,ironisnotmorestubborn,thanthesesoftandyieldingcreatures。Itisnoearthlyusemycoming——I'llcome。"
  Hecamethatveryevening,andsawdirectlyshewasworse。"Ofcourse,"saidhe,sadly,"youhavenottakenmyadvice。"
  Rosarepliedwithatossandanevasion,"Iwasnotworthaprescription!"
  "Aphysiciancanprescribewithoutsendinghispatienttothedruggist;andwhenhedoes,thenitishiswordsaregold。"
  Rosashookherheadwithanairofloftyincredulity。
  HelookedruefullyatMr。Lusignanandwassilent。Rosasmiledsarcastically;shethoughthewasathiswit'send。
  Notquite:hewascudgellinghisbrainsinsearchofsomehorriblyunscientificargument,thatmightprevail;forhefeltsciencewouldfalldeaduponsofairanantagonist。Atlasthiseyekindled;hehadhitonanargumentunscientificenoughforanybody,hethought。Saidhe,ingratiatingly,"YoubelievetheOldTestament?"
  "OfcourseIdo,everysyllable。"
  "Andthelessonsitteaches?"
  "Certainly!"
  "Thenletmetellyouastoryfromthatbook。ASyriangeneralhadaterribledisease。HeconsultedElishabydeputy。Elishasaid,'Batheseventimesinacertainriver,Jordan,andyouwillgetwell。'Thegeneraldidnotlikethisatall;hewantedaprescription;wantedtogotothedruggist;didn'tbelieveinhydropathytobegin,and,inanycase,turneduphisnoseatJordan。What!batheinanIsraelitishbrook,whenhisowncountryboastednoblerivers,withareputationforsanctityintothebargain?Inshort,hepreferredhisleprosytosuchirregularmedicine。Butithappened,bysomeimmensefortuity,thatoneofhisservants,thoughanOriental,wasafriend,insteadofaflatterer;andthissensiblefellowsaid,'Iftheprophettoldyoutodosomegreatanddifficultthing,togetridofthisfearfulmalady,wouldnotyoudoit,howeverdistasteful?andcanyouhesitatewhenhemerelysays,WashintheJordan,andbehealed?'
  Thegenerallistenedtogoodsense,andcuredhimself。Yourcaseisparallel。Youwouldtakequantitiesoffoulmedicine;youwouldsubmittosomepainfuloperation,iflifeandhealthdependedonit;thenwhynotdoasmallthingforagreatresult?Youhaveonlytotakeoffanunnaturalmachinewhichcripplesyourgrowingframe,andwasunknowntoeveryoneofthewomenwhoseformsinParianmarbletheworldadmires。Offwiththatmonstrosity,andyourcureisascertainastheSyriangeneral's;thoughscience,andnotinspiration,dictatestheeasyremedy。"
  Rosahadlistenedimpatiently,andnowrepliedwithsomewarmth,"Thisisshockinglyprofane。TheideaofcomparingyourselftoElisha,andmetoahorridleper!Muchobliged!NotthatIknowwhataleperis。"
  "Come,come!thatisnotfair,"saidMr。Lusignan。"Heonlycomparedthesituation,notthepeople。"
  "But,papa,theBibleisnottobedraggedintothecommonaffairsoflife。"
  "Thenwhatonearthistheuseofit?"
  "Oh,papa!Well,itisnotSunday,butIhavehadasermon。Thisistheclergyman,andyouarethecommentator——he!he!Andsonowletusgobackfromdivinitytomedicine。Irepeat"thiswasthefirsttimeshehadsaidit"thatmyotherdoctorsgivemerealprescriptions,writteninhieroglyphics。Youcan'tlookatthemwithoutfeelingthereMUSTbesomethinginthem。"
  AnangryspotroseonChristopher'scheek,butheonlysaid,"Andareyourotherdoctorssatisfiedwiththeprogressyourdisorderismakingundertheirsuperintendence?"
  "Perfectly!Papa,tellhimwhattheysay,andI'llfindhimtheirprescriptions。"Shewenttoadrawer,andrummaged,affectingnottolisten。
  Lusignancomplied。"Firstofall,sir,Imusttellyoutheyareconfidentitisnotthelungs,buttheliver。"
  "Thewhat!"shoutedChristopher。
  "Ah!"screamedRosa。"Oh,don't!——bawling!"
  "Anddon'tyouscreech,"saidherfather,withalookofmiseryandapprehensionimpartiallydistributedontheresoundingpair。
  "Youmusthavemisunderstoodthem,"murmuredStaines,inavoicethatwasnowbarelyaudibleayardoff。"Thehemorrhageofabrightredcolor,andexpelledwithouteffortornausea?"
  "Fromtheliver——theyhaveassuredmeagainandagain,"saidLusignan。
  Christopher'sfacestillworealookofblankamazement,tillRosaherselfconfirmeditpositively。
  Thenhecastalookofagonyuponher,andstartedupinapassion,forgettingoncemorethathishostabhorredthesonorous。"Oh,shame!shame!"hecried,"thatthenobleprofessionofmedicineshouldbedisgracedbyignorancesuchasthis。"Thenhesaid,sternly,"Sir,donotmistakemymotives;butIdeclinetohaveanythingfurthertodowiththiscase,untilthosetwogentlemenhavebeenrelievedofit;and,asthisisveryharsh,andonmypartunprecedented,IwillgiveyouonereasonoutofmanyICOULD
  giveyou。Sir,thereisnoroadfromthelivertothethroatbywhichbloodcantravelinthisway,defyingthelawsofgravity;
  andtheyknew,fromthepatient,thatnostrongexpellentforcehaseverbeeninoperation。Theirdiagnosis,therefore,impliesagnosis,orignorancetoogreattobeforgiven。Iwillnotsharemypatientwithtwogentlemenwhoknowsolittleofmedicine,andknownothingofanatomy,whichistheABCofmedicine。CanIseetheirprescriptions?"
  Thesewerehandedtohim。"Goodheavens!"saidhe,"haveyoutakenallthese?"
  "Mostofthem。"
  "Why,thenyouhavedrunkabouttwogallonsofunwholesomeliquids,andeatenapoundortwoofunwholesomesolids。Thesemedicineshaveco-operatedwiththemalady。Thedisorderlies,notinthehemorrhage,butintheprecedentextravasationthatisadrainonthesystem;andhowisthelosstobesupplied?Why,bytakingalittlemorenourishmentthanbefore;thereisnootherway;andprobablyNature,lefttoherself,mighthaveincreasedyourappetitetomeettheoccasion。ButthosetwoworthieshavestruckthatweaponoutofNature'shand;theyhavepepperedawayatthepoorill-usedstomachwithdrugsanddraughts,notverydeleteriousIgrantyou,butallmoreorlessindigestible,andalltending,nottowhettheappetite,buttoclogthestomach,orturnthestomach,orpesterthestomach,andsoimpairtheappetite,andsoco-operate,indirectly,withthemalady。"
  "Thisisgoodsense,"saidLusignan。"Ideclare,I——IwishIknewhowtogetridofthem。"
  "Oh,I'lldothat,papa。"
  "No,no;itisnotwortharumpus。"
  "I'lldoittoopolitelyforthat。Christopher,youareveryclever——TERRIBLYclever。WheneverIthrewtheirmedicinesaway,I
  wasalwaysalittlebetterthatday。Iwillsacrificethemtoyou。
  ItISasacrifice。Theyarebothsokindandchatty,anddon'tgrudgemehieroglyphics;nowyoudo。"
  ShesatdownandwrotetwosweetletterstoDr。SnellandMr。
  Wyman,thankingthemforthegreatattentiontheyhadpaidher;butfindingherselfgettingsteadilyworse,inspiteofalltheyhaddoneforher,sheproposedtodiscontinuehermedicinesforatime,andtrychangeofair。
  "Andsupposetheycalltoseewhetheryouarechangingtheair?"
  "Inthatcase,papa——'notathome。'"
  Thenoteswereaddressedanddespatched。
  ThenDr。Stainesbrightenedup,andsaidtoLusignan,"IamnowhappytotellyouthatIhaveoverratedthemalady。ThesadchangeIseeinMissLusignanispartlyduetothegreatbulkofunwholesomeesculentsshehasbeeneatinganddrinkingundertheheadofmedicines。Thesediscontinued,shemightlingeronforyears,existing,thoughnotliving——thetight-lacedcannotbesaidtolive。Butifshewouldbehealthyandhappy,letherthrowthatdiabolicalmachineintothefire。Itisnouseaskinghertoloosenit;shecan't。Oncethere,thetemptationistoostrong。
  Offwithit,and,takemyword,youwillbeoneofthehealthiestandmostvigorousyoungladiesinEurope。"
  Rosalookedrueful,andalmostsullen。Shesaidshehadpartedwithherdoctorsforhim,butshereallycouldnotgoaboutwithoutstays。"Theyareaslooseastheycanbe。See!"
  "Thatpartoftheprogrammeisdisposedof,"saidChristopher。
  "PleasegoontoNo。2。Howabouttherawredlinewheretheloosemachinehassawedyou?"
  "Whatredline?Nosuchthing!Somebodyorotherhasbeenpeepinginatmywindow。I'llhavetheivycutdownto-morrow。"
  "Simpleton!"saidMr。Lusignan,angrily。"Youhaveletthecatoutofthebag。Thereissuchamark,then,andthisextraordinaryyoungmanhasdiscerneditwiththeeyeofscience。"
  "Heneverdiscerneditatall,"saidRosa,redasfire;"and,whatismore,heneverwill。"
  "Idon'twantto。Ishouldbeverysorryto。Ihopeitwillbegoneinaweek。"
  "IwishYOUweregonenow——exposingmeinthiscruelway,"saidRosa,angrywithherselfforhavingsaidanidioticthing,andfuriouswithhimforhavingmadehersayit。
  "Oh,Rosa!"saidChristopher,inavoiceoftenderestreproach。
  ButMr。Lusignaninterferedpromptly。"Rosa,nonoise。Iwillnothaveyousnappingatyourbestfriendandmine。Ifyouareexcited,youhadbetterretiretoyourownroomandcomposeyourself。Ihateaclamor。"
  Rosamadeawryfaceatthisrebuke,andthenbegantocryquietly。
  EverytearwaslikeadropofbloodfromChristopher'sheart。
  "Praydon'tscoldher,sir,"saidhe,readytosnivelhimself。
  "Shemeantnothingunkind:itisonlyherprettysprightlyway;andshedidnotreallyimaginealovesoreverentasmine"——
  "Don'tYOUinterferebetweenmyfatherandme,"saidthisreasonableyounglady,nowinanungovernablestateoffeminineirritability。
  "No,Rosa,"saidChristopher,humbly。"Mr。Lusignan,"saidhe,"I
  hopeyouwilltellherthat,fromtheveryfirst,IwasunwillingtoenteronthissubjectwithHER。NeithershenorIcanforgetmydoublecharacter。IhavenotsaidhalfasmuchtoherasIought,beingherphysician;andyetyouseeIhavesaidmorethanshecanbearfromme,who,sheknows,loveherandrevereher。Then,onceforall,doprayletmeputthisdelicatematterintoyourhands:
  itisacaseforparentalauthority。"
  "Unfatherlytyranny,thatmeans,"saidRosa。"Whatbusinesshavegentlemeninterferinginsuchthings?Itisunheardof。Iwillnotsubmittoit,evenfrompapa。"
  "Well,youneednotscreamatme,"saidMr。Lusignan;andheshruggedhisshoulderstoStaines。"Sheisimpracticable,yousee。
  IfIdomyduty,therewillbeadisturbance。"
  NowthisrousedthebileofDr。Staines。"What,sir!"saidhe,"youcouldseparateherandmebyyourauthority,hereinthisveryroom;andyet,whenherlifeisatstake,youabdicate!Youcouldpartherfromamanwholovedherwitheverydropofhisheart,——
  andshesaidshelovedhim,or,atallevents,preferredhimtoothers,——andyoucannotpartherfromamiserablecorset,althoughyouseeinherpoorwastedfacethatitiscarryinghertothechurchyard。Inthatcase,sir,thereisbutonethingforyoutodo,——withdrawyouroppositionandletmemarryher。AsherloverI
  ampowerless;butinvestmewithahusband'sauthority,andyouwillsoonseetherosesreturntohercheek,andherelasticfigureexpanding,andhereyebeamingwithhealthandthehappinessthatcomesofperfecthealth。"
  Mr。Lusignanmadeananswerneitherofhishearersexpected。Hesaid,"Ihaveagreatmindtotakeyouatyourword。IamtoooldandfondofquiettodriveaSimpletoninsingleharness。"
  Thiscontemptuousspeech,and,aboveall,thewordSimpleton,whichhadbeenappliedtoherprettyfreelybyyoungladiesatschool,andalwaysgalledherterribly,inflictedsointolerableawoundonRosa'svanity,thatshewasreadytoburst:onthat,ofcourse,herstayscontributedtheirmiteofphysicaluneasiness。Thusirritatedmindandbody,sheburnedtostrikeinreturn;andasshecouldnotslapherfatherinthepresenceofanother,shegaveitChristopherback-handed。
  "Youcanturnmeoutofdoors,"saidshe,"ifyouaretiredofyourdaughter,butIamnotsuchaSIMPLETONastomarryatyrant。No;
  hehasshowntheclovenfootintime。Ahusband'sAUTHORITY,indeed!"Thensheturnedherhand,andgaveithimdirect。"Youtoldmeadifferentstorywhenyouwerepayingyourcourttome;
  thenyouweretobemyservant,——allhypocriticalsweetness。YouhadbettergoandmarryaCircassianslave。Theydon'twearstays,andtheydoweartrousers;soshewillbeunfeminineenough,evenforyou。NoEnglishladywouldletherhusbanddictatetoheraboutsuchathing。IcanhaveasmanyhusbandsasIlike,withoutfallingintotheclutchesofatyrant。Youarearude,indelicate——
  Andsopleaseunderstanditisalloverbetweenyouandme。"
  Bothherauditorsstoodaghast,forsheutteredthisconclusionwithadignityofwhichtheopeninggavenopromise,andtheoccasion,weighedinmasculinebalances,wasnotworthy。
  "Youdonotmeanthat。Youcannotmeanit,"saidDr。Staines,aghast。
  "Idomeanit,"saidshe,firmly;"and,ifyouareagentleman,youwillnotcompelmetosayittwice——threetimes,Imean。"
  Atthisdagger-strokeChristopherturnedverypale,buthemaintainedhisdignity。"Iamagentleman,"saidhe,quietly,"andaveryunfortunateone。Good-by,sir;thankyoukindly。Good-by,Rosa;Godblessyou!Oh,praytakeathought!Remember,yourlifeanddeathareinyourownhandnow。Iampowerless。"
  Andheleftthehouseinsorrow,andjust,butnotpettish,indignation。
  Whenhewasgone,fatheranddaughterlookedateachother,andtherewasthesilencethatsucceedsastorm。
  Rosa,feelingthemostuneasy,wasthefirsttoexpresshersatisfaction。"There,HEisgone,andIamgladofit。NowyouandIshallneverquarrelagain。Iwasquiteright。Suchimpertinence!Suchindelicacy!AfineprospectformeifIhadmarriedsuchaman!However,heisgone,andsothere'sanendofit。Theidea!tellingayounglady,beforeherfather,sheistight-laced!IfyouhadnotbeenthereIcouldhaveforgivenhim。
  ButIamnot;itisastory。Now,"suddenlyexaltinghervoice,"I
  knowyoubelievehim。"
  "Isaynothing,"whisperedpapa,hopingtostillherbyexample。
  Thisrusedidnotsucceed。
  "Butyoulookvolumes,"criedshe:"andIcan'tbearit。Iwon'tbearit。Ifyoudon'tbelieveME,askmyMAID。"Andwiththisfelicitousspeech,sherangthebell。
  "You'llbreakthewireifyoudon'tmind,"suggestedherfather,piteously。
  "Allthebetter!Whyshouldnotwiresbebrokenaswellasmyheart?Oh,heresheis!Now,Harriet,comehere。"
  "Yes,miss。"
  "Andtellthetruth。AMItight-laced?"
  Harrietlookedinherfaceamomenttoseewhatwasrequiredofher,andthensaid,"Thatyouarenot,miss。Ineverdressedayoungladyaswore'emeasierthanyoudo。"
  "There,papa!Thatwilldo,Harriet。"
  Harrietretiredasfarasthekeyhole;shesawsomethingwasup。
  "Now,"saidRosa,"youseeIwasright;and,afterall,itwasamatchyoudidnotapprove。Well,itisallover,andnowyoumaywritetoyourfavorite,ColonelBright。Ifhecomeshere,I'llboxhisoldears。Ihatehim。Ihatethemall。Forgiveyourwaywardgirl。I'llstaywithyouallmydays。Idaresaythatwillnotbelong,nowIhavequarrelledwithmyguardianangel;andallforwhat?Papa!papa!howCANyousitthereandnotspeakmeonewordofcomfort?'SIMPLETON?'Ah!thatIamtothrowawayaloveaqueenisscarcelyworthyof;andallforwhat?Really,ifitwasn'tfortheingratitudeandwickednessofthething,itistoolaughable。Ha!ha!——oh!oh!oh!——ha!ha!ha!"
  Andoffshewentintohysterics,andbegantogulpandchokefrightfully。