Agentlemanwithusremarkedwithasigh，"Ihavebeeninalmosteveryschoolinthecityandfindthesameconditioneverywhere。Itisterrible，buttheredoesn’tseemtobeanyremedyforit。"Thetasteforlivinginared—hotatmosphereisgrowingonourpeople；evenpublicvehicleshavetobeheatednowtopleasethepatrons。
　　WhentiresomeoldBenjaminFranklinmadestovespopularhestruckaterribleblowatthehealthofhiscompatriots；theintroductionofsteamheatandconsequentsuppressionofallhealth—givingventilationdidtherest；therosycheeksofAmericanchildrenwentupthechimneywiththelastwhiffofwoodsmoke，andhaveneverreturned。Muchofourhomelifefollowed；nofamilycanbeexpectedtogatherincheerfulconversearounda"radiator。"
　　Howcanthishorroroffreshairamongusbeexplained？Ifpeoplereallyenjoylivinginoverheatedroomswithlittleornoventilation，whyisitthatwehearsomuchcomplaining，whenduringthesummermonthsthethermometerrunsupintothefamiliarnineties？Whyarechildrenhurriedoutoftown，andwhydowivesconsideritanecessitytodeserttheirhusbands？
　　It’sratherinconsistent，tosaytheleast，fornotoneofthosedesertersbutwould"kick"ifthetheatreorchurchtheyattendfellbelowthattemperatureinDecember。
　　Itisimpossibletogointoourbanksandofficesandnotrealizethattheairhasbeenbreathedagainandagain，heatedandcooled，butneverchanged，—doorsandwindowsfittootightlyforthat。
　　Thepalloranddazedexpressionoftheemployeestellthesametale。Ispoketoayouththeotherdayinanofficeabouthisappearanceandaskedifhewasill。"Yes，"heanswered，"I
　　havehadasuccessionofcoldsallwinter。Yousee，mydeskhereisnexttotheradiator，soIaminaperpetualperspirationandcatchcoldassoonasIgoout。LastwinterIpassedthreemonthsinafarmhouse，wherethewaterfrozeinmyroomatnight，andwehadtowearovercoatstoourmeals。
　　YetIneverhadacoldthere，andgainedinweightandstrength。"
　　Twentyyearsagono"palatialprivateresidence"wasconsideredcompleteunlesstherewasastationarywashstand（formingadirectconnectionwiththesewer）ineachbedroom。
　　Welookedpityinglyonforeignerswhodidnotenjoytheseadvantages，untilonedaywerealizedthatthelatterwereintheright，andstraightwaystationarywashstandsdisappeared。
　　Howmuchtimemustpassandhowmanyvictimsbesacrificedbeforewecometooursensesonthegreatradiatorquestion？
　　Asaresultofourpopulationlivinginafurnace，ithappensnowthatwhenyourebelonbeingforcedtotakeanimpromptuTurkishbathatatheatre，theusheranswersyourcomplaintwith"Itcan’tbeaswarmasyouthink，foraladyovertherehasjusttoldmeshefeltchillyandaskedformoreheat！"
　　Anotherinventionoftheenemyisthe"revolvingdoor。"Bythisingeniouscontrivancethelittlefreshairthatformerlycreptintoabuildingisnowexcluded。Whichexplainswhyonenteringourlargerhotelsoneistakenbythethroat，asitwere，byasickeninglong—deadatmosphere—inwhichthesouvenirofpastmealsanddecayingflowersfloatslikearegret—suchasexplorersmustfindonopeninganEgyptiantomb。
　　Absurdasitmayseem，ithasbecomeadistinctiontohavecoolrooms。Alas，theyarerare！Thoseblessedhouseholdswhereonehasthedelicioussensationofbeingchillyandcanturnwithpleasuretowardcracklingwood！Theopenfirehasbecome，withinthelastdecade，atestofrefinement，almostaquestionofgoodbreeding，formingabroaddistinctionbetweendaintyhouseholdsandvulgarones，andmarkingthelinewhichseparatesthehomesofcultivatedpeoplefromtheparlorsofthosewhocareonlyfordisplay。
　　Adrawing—roomfilledwithheat，thesourceofwhichremainsinvisible，isascharacteristicoftheparvenuasclankingchainsonaharnessorfineclothesworninthestreet。
　　Anopenfireisthe"eye"ofaroom，whichcannomorebeattractivewithoutitthanthehumanfacecanbebeautifulifitlacksthevisualorgans。The"gasfire"bearsaboutthesamerelationtotherealthingasaglasseyedoestoanaturalone，andproducesmuchthesamesensation。Artificialeyesarepainfulnecessitiesinsomecases，andthereforecannotbecondemned；butthehouseholdwhichgatherscomplacentlyarounda"gaslog"musthavesomethingradicallywrongwithit，andwouldbecapableofworseoffencesagainsttasteandhospitality。
　　ThereisatombstoneinaNewEnglandgrave—yardtheinscriptiononwhichreads："Iwaswell，Iwantedtobebetter。HereIam。"
　　Asregardsheatingofourhouses，it’stobefearedthatwehavegonemuchthesameroadastheunfortunateNewEnglander。
　　Idon’tmeantoimplythatheisnowsufferingfromtoomuchheat，butwe，asanation，certainlyare。
　　Janitorsandparlor—carconductorshavereplacedthewickedfairiesofotherdays，butareapparentlyanimatedbytheirmalignantspirit，andemploytheirhoursofbriefauthorityascruelly。Nowitchdancingaroundherboilingcauldronwasevermorejoyfulthanthefiremanofamodernhotel，ashegleefullyturnsmoreandmoresteamuponhishelplessvictims。
　　Longacquaintancewiththatgentlemanhasconvincedmethathecannotpleadignoranceasanexcuseforfallingintotheseexcesses。Itispure，unadulteratedperversity，elsewhyshouldheinvariablychoosethemildestmorningstoshowwhathisenginescando？
　　Manyexplanationshavebeenofferedforthisloveofahightemperaturebyourcompatriots。Perhapsthetrueonehasnotyetbeenfound。Isitnotpossiblethatwhatappearstobefollyandalmostcriminalnegligenceoftherulesofhealth，maybe，afterall，onlyacommendableambitiontorenewtheexploitsofthosebiblicalheroes，Shadrach，Meshach，andAbednego？
　　Chapter12—TheParisofourGrandparentsWEareapttofallintotheerrorofassumingthatonlyAmericancitieshavedisplacedtheircentresandchangedtheirappearanceduringthelasthalf—century。
　　The"oldestinhabitant，"withhistwice—toldtalesoftransformationsandchanges，istoacertainextentresponsibleforthis；bycontrast，weimaginethatthecapitalsofEuropehavealwaysbeenjustasweseethem。SostrongisthisimpressionthatitrequiresaseriouseffortoftheimaginationtoreconstructtheParisthatourgrandparentsknewandadmired，fewastheyearsarethatseparatetheirdayfromours。
　　Itis，forinstance，difficulttoconceiveofaParisthatendedattherueRoyale，withonlywastelandandmarketgardensbeyondtheMadeleine，whereto—daysomanyavenuesopentheirstatelyperspectives；yetsuchwasthecase！ThefewfineresidencesthatexistedbeyondthatpointfacedtheFaubourgSaint—Honore，withgardensrunningbacktoanunkemptopencountrycalledtheChampsElysees，whereanunfinishedArcdeTriomphestoodaloneinawildernessthatnooneeverdreamedoftraversing。
　　ThefashionableladiesofthattimedroveintheafternoonalongtheboulevardsfromtheMadeleinetotheChateaud’Eau，andstoppedtheirponderousyellowbarouchesatTortoni’s，whereiceswereservedtothemintheircarriages，whiletheychattedwithimmaculatedandiesinskin—tightnankeenunmentionables，blueswallow—tailedcoats，andfurry`beaver"
　　hats。
　　Whilelookingoversomebooksinthecompanyofanoldladywhofromtimetotimeopensherstoreoftreasuresandrecallsherremoteyouthatmyrequest，andwhoseSPIRITUELandgraphiclanguagegivestohersouvenirstheairofbeingstraychaptersfromsomeold—fashionedromance，IreceivedavividimpressionofhowtheFrenchcapitalmusthavelookedfiftyyearsago。
　　Emptyinginhercompanyachestofbooksthathadnotseenthelightforseveraldecades，wecameacrossa"PanoramaoftheBoulevards，"dated1845，whichprovedwhenunfoldedtobeacoloredlithograph，acoupleofyardslongbyfiveorsixincheshigh，representingthelineofboulevardsfromtheMadeleinetothePlacedelaBastille。Eachhouse，almosteachtree，wasfaithfullydepicted，togetherwiththecrowdsonthesidewalksandthecarriagesinthestreet。Thewholescenewasasdifferentfromtheeffectmadebythatthoroughfareto—dayasthoughfivehundredandnotfiftyyearshadelapsedsincethelittlebookwasprinted。Thepicturebreathedanatmosphereofcalmandnamelessquaintnessthatonefindsnowonlyinoldprovincialcitieswhichhaveescapedtheravagesofimprovement。
　　Mycompanionsatwiththebookunfoldedbeforeher，inasmilingtrance。Hermindhadturnedbacktothefar—awaydayswhenshefirsttrodthosestreetsabride，withallthepleasuresandfewofthecaresoflifetothinkabout。
　　Iwatchedherinsilence（itseemedasacrilegetobreakinonsuchatrainofthought），untilgraduallyhereyeslosttheirfar—awayexpression，and，turningtomewithasmile，sheexclaimed："Howweeverhadthecouragetoappearinthestreetdressedaswewereisamystery！Doyouseethatcarriage？"pointingintheprinttoahigh—swungfamilyvehiclewithapowderedcoachmanonthebox，andtwosky—bluelackeysstandingbehind。"Icanremember，asifitwereyesterday，goingtodrivewithLadyB—，theBritishambassadress，injustsuchaconveyance。Shedrovefourhorseswithfeathersontheirheads，whensheusedtocometoMeurice’sforme。IblushwhenIthinkthatmyfrockwassoscantthatIhadtoraisetheskirtalmosttomykneesinordertogetintohercarriage。
　　"Whywedidn’talldieofpneumoniaisanothermarvel，forweworelow—neckeddressesandthethinnestofslippersinthestreet，ourheadsbeingabouttheonlypartthatwascompletelycovered。Iwasparticularlyproudofaturbansurmountedwithabirdofparadise，butLadyB—affectedpokebonnets，thenjustcomingintofashion，solargeandsodeepthatwhenonelookedatherfromthesidenothingwasvisibleexcepttwocurls，`asdampandasblackasleeches。’Inotherwaysourtoiletswereabsurdlyunsuitedforevery—daywear；weworelightscarvesoverournecks，andrarelyusedfurlinedpelisses。"
　　Returningtoanexaminationofthepanorama，mycompanionpointedouttomethattherewasnobreakintheboulevards，wheretheopera—house，withitssevenradiatingavenues，nowstands，butalonglineofHotels，dozingbehindhighwalls，andquainttwo—storiedbuildingsthatundoubtedlydatedfromtherazingofthecitywallandtheopeningofthenewthoroughfareunderLouisXV。
　　Alittlefartheronwastheworld—famousMaisonDoree，whereonealmostexpectedtoseeAlfreddeMussetandledocteurVerondiningwithDumasandEugeneSue。
　　"Whatinthenameofgoodnessisthat？"Iexclaimed，pointingtoacoupleofblackandyellowmonstrositiesonwheels，whichlookedlikethreecarriagesjoinedtogetherwitha"buggy"
　　addedoninfront。
　　"That’sthediligencejustarrivedfromCalais；ithasbeentwodaysENROUTE，thepassengerssleepingasbesttheycould，sidebyside，andescapingfromtheirconfinementonlywhenhorseswerechangedorwhilestoppingformeals。Thathightwo—wheeledtrapwiththelittle`tiger’standingupbehindisatilbury。WeusedtoseetheCountd’Orsaydrivingonelikethatalmosteveryday。Heworebutter—coloredgloves，andtheskirtsofhiscoatwerepleatedfullallaround，andstoodoutlikeaballetgirl’s。ItisapitytheyhavenotincludedLouisPhilippeandhisfamilyjoggingofftoNeuillyinthecourt`carryall，’—the`CitizenKing，’withhisblueumbrellabetweenhisknees，tryingtolooklikeanhonestbourgeois，andfailingeveninthatattempttopleasetheParisians。
　　"WewereinParisin’48；frommywindowatMeurice’sIsawpooroldJUSTEMILIEUreadhisabdicationfromthehistoricmiddlebalconyoftheTuileries，andhalfanhourlaterweperceivedtheDuchessed’OrleansleavetheTuileriesonfoot，leadinghertwosonsbythehand，andwalkthroughthegardensandacrossthePlacedelaConcordetotheCorpsLegislatif，inalastattempttosavethecrownforherson。Futileeffort！Thateveningthe`CitizenKing’washurriedthroughthosesamegardensandintoapassingcab，ENROUTEforalifeexile。
　　"OurbalconyatMeurice’swasafinepointofobservationfromwhichtowatcharevolution。Withanopera—glasswecouldseethemobsurgingtothesackofthepalace，thepricelessfurnitureandbric—a—bracflungintothestreet，courtdresseswavedonpikesfromthetallwindows，andfinallythethronebroughtout，andcarriedofftobeburned。Therewasnokeepingthemenofourpartyinafterthat。Theyrushedofftohaveanearerglimpseofthefighting，andwesawnomoreofthemuntildaybreakthefollowingmorningwhen，justaswewerepreparingtosendforthepolice，twodilapidated，ragged，black—facedmortalsappeared，inwhomwebarelyrecognizedourhusbands。Theyhadbeenimpressedintoserviceandpassedtheirnightbuildingbarricades。Mybetterhalf，however，hadsucceededinsnatchingahandfulofthegoldfringefromthethroneasitwascarriedby，anactofprowessthatrepaidhimforallhistroublesandfatigue。
　　"Ipassedthegreaterpartofforty—eighthoursonourbalcony，watchingthemobmarchingby，singingLA
　　MARSEILLAISE，andcampingatnightinthestreets。ItwasallIcoulddototearmyselfawayfromthewindowlongenoughtoeatandwriteinmyjournal。
　　"TherewasnoAvenuedel’Operathen。ThetripfromtheboulevardstothePalais—RoyalhadtobemadebyalongdetouracrossthePlaceVendome（where，bythebye，acattlemarketwasheld）orthroughalabyrinthofnarrow，bad—smellinglittlestreets，wherestrangerseasilylosttheirway。Nexttotheboulevards，thePalais—Royalwasthecentreoftheelegantanddissipatedlifeinthecapital。Itwastherewemetofanafternoontodrinkchocolateatthe`Rotonde，’ortodineat`LesTroisFreresProvencaux，’andletourhusbandshaveatryatthegamblingtablesinthePassaged’Orleans。
　　"Noonethoughtofbuyingjewelryanywhereelse。Itwasfromthewindowsofitsshopsthatthefashionsstartedontheirwayaroundtheworld。WhenVictoriaasabridewasvisitingLouisPhilippe，shewassofascinatedbytheaspectoftheplacethatthegallantFrenchkingorderedaminiaturecopyofthescene，madeINPAPIER—MACHE，asapresentforhisguest，asortofgiganticdolls’houseinwhichnotonlythepalaceanditslongcolonnadeswerereproduced，buteverytinyshopandthemyriadarticlesforsalewerecopiedwithChinesefidelity。Unfortunatelythepear—headedoldkingbecameEngland’suninvitedguestbeforethisclumsytoywasfinished，soitnevercrossedtheChannel，butcanbeseento—daybyanyonecuriousenoughtoexamineit，intheMuseeCarnavalet。
　　"FewofusrealizethattheParisofCharlesX。andLouisPhilippewouldseemtousnowasmall，ill—paved，andworse—
　　lightedprovincialtown，withfewtheatresorhotels，communicatingwiththeouterworldonlybymeansofahorse—
　　drawn`post，’andpracticallyfartherfromLondonthanConstantinopleisto—day。Onefeelsthisisolationintheliteratureofthetime；brilliantastheepochwas，thehorizonofitswriterswasboundedbytheboulevardsandtheFaubourgSaint—Germain。"
　　Dumassayslaughingly，inalettertoafriend："IhaveneverventuredintotheunexploredcountrybeyondtheBastille，butamconvincedthatitshelterswildanimalsandsavages。"Thewitandbrainsoftheperiodwereconcentratedintoasmallspace。Money—makinghadnomorepartintheprogrammeofawriterthenthananintroductioninto"society。"Cateringtoaforeignmarketandsnobbishnesswereundreamed—ofdegradations。ParishadnotyetbeenturnedintotheFOIREDU
　　MONDEthatshehassincebecome，withwholequartersgivenovertotheuseofforeigners，—theatres，restaurants，andhotelscreatedonlyfortheuseofapolyglotpopulationthatcouldgivelessonstothepeoplearoundBabel’sfamous"tower。"
　　Chapter13—SomeAmericanHusbandsUNTILthebeginningofthiscenturymenplayedtheBEAUROLE
　　inlife’scomedy。Asintherestoftheanimalworld，ourmaleswerethebrilliantmembersofthecommunity，flauntingtheirgaudyplumageathomeandabroad，whilethewomen—folkremainedinseclusion，tendingtheirchildren，directingtheservants，orministeringtotheirlords’comfort。
　　Inthosehappydaysthehusbandruledsupremeathisownfireside，receivingthehomageofthefamily，whobenttohiswillandobeyedhisorders。
　　Duringthelastcentury，however，the"part"ofbetterhalfhasbecomelessandlessattractiveinAmerica，oneprerogativeafteranotherhavingbeenwhiskedawaybyenterprisingwives。ModernDelilahshaveyearlysnippedoffmoreandmoreofSamson’sluxuriantcurls，andaddedthoseornamentstotheirownCOIFFURES，untilinthemajorityoffamiliesthehusbandfindshimselfreducedtoastateofbondagecomparedwithwhichthebiblicalheroenjoyedapamperedidleness。TimeshaveindeedchangedinAmericasincethenativechiefsatindignifiedreposebedizenedwithallthefineryathand，whiletheladiesofthefamilywaitedtremblinglyuponhim。To—dayitistheAmericanhusbandwhoturnsthegrindstonealltheyearround，anditishisprettytyrantwhoenjoystheelegantleisurethatacenturyagowasconsideredamasculineluxury。
　　ToAmericamustbegiventhecreditofhavingproducedthemodelhusband，anewspecies，asitwere，oftheGENUSHOMO。
　　InnoroledoesacompatriotappeartosuchadvantageasinthatofBenedict。Asaboyheisoftentooadvancedforhisyearsorhisinformation；inyouthheisconspicuousneitherforhisculturenorhisunselfishness。Butonceinmatrimonialharnessthisuntrainedanimalbecomesbridle—wisewithsurprisingrapidity，andwillfortherestoflifegothroughhispaces，waltzing，kneeing，andsalutingwithhardlyatouchofthewhip。Whetherthisistheresultofsuperiorhorse—womanshiponthepartofAmericanwivesoratraitpeculiartosonsof"UncleSam，"ishardtosay，butthefactisself—evidenttoanyobserverthatourfairequestriansrarelymeetwitharebelliousmount。
　　Anyonewhohasstudiedmaritalwaysinotherlandswillrealizethatinnocountryhavethemeneffacedthemselvessogracefullyaswithus。Inthisrespectnoforeignproductioncancompareforamomentwiththedomesticarticle。InEnglish，French，andGermanfamiliesthehusbandisstillall—
　　powerful。Thehouseismounted，guestsareasked，andtheyearplannedouttosuithisoccupationsandpleasure。Herepapaisrarelyconsulteduntilsuchmattershavebeendecideduponbytheladies，whentheheadofthehouseiscalledintosignthechecks。
　　IhavehadoccasionmorethanoncetobewailtheshortcomingsoftheAmericanman，andsotakepleasureinpointingoutthemodestyandgoodtemperwithwhichhefillsthisrole。Heistrainedfromthebeginningtogiveallandexpectnothinginreturn，anAmericangirlrarelybringinganyDOTtoherhusband，nomatterhowwealthyherfamilymaybe。If，asoccasionallyhappens，anincomeisallowedabridebyherparents，sheexpectstospenditonhertoiletsorpleasures。
　　Thisconditionofthematrimonialmarketexistsinnoothercountry；eveninEngland，whereMARIAGESDECONVENANCEarerare，"settlements"formaninevitablepreludetoconjugalbliss。
　　ThefactthatshecontributeslittleornothingtothecommonincomeinnowayembarrassesanAmericanwife；herpretensionsareusuallyinaninverseproportiontoherpersonalmeans。A
　　manIknewsomeyearsagodeliberatelychosehisbridefromanimpecuniousfamily（inthehopethathersimplesurroundingshadinculcatedhomelytaste），andannouncedtoanincredulouscircleoffriends，athislastbachelordinner，thatheintended，infuture，topasshiseveningsathisfireside，betweenhisbookandhisprettyspouse。Poor，innocent，confidingmortal！Thewifequicklybecameabelleofthefastestsetintown。Havinghadmorethanshewantedoffiresidesandquieteveningsbeforehermarriage，herideawastogoaboutasmuchaspossible，and，whennotsooccupied，tofillherhousewithcompany。Itmaybelaiddownasamaximinthisconnectionthatamanmarriestoobtainahome，andagirltogetawayfromone；hencedisappointmentonbothsides。
　　Thecoupleinquestionhaveinallprobabilitynotpassedaneveningalonesincetheyweremarried，theladyrarelystoppingintheroundofhergayetiesuntilshecollapsesfromfatigue。Theirhomeistypicaloftheirlife，whichitselfcanbetakenasagoodexampleoftheexistencethatmostofour"smart"peoplelead。Thegroundfloorandthefirstflooraregivenuptoentertaining。Thesecondisoccupiedbythespacioussitting，bath，andsleepingroomsofthelady。A
　　ten—by—twelvechambersufficesformylord，andtheonlydenhecanrightlycallhisownisasmallroomnearthefrontdoor，aboutasprivateasthesidewalk，whichisturnedintoacloak—roomwheneverthecouplereceive，makingitimpossibletokeepbooksorpapersofvaluethere，oreventouseitasasmoking—roomafterdinner，sohismenguestssitaroundthedismantleddining—tablewhiletheladiesareenjoyingasuiteofparlorsabove。
　　Atfirsttheideaofsuchanunequaldivisionofthehouseshocksoursenseofjustice，untilwereflectthattheAmericanhusbandisnotexpectedtoremainathome。That’snothisplace！Ifheisnotdowntownmakingmoney，fashiondictatesthathemustbeatsomeclub—houseplayingagame。A
　　manwhoshouldremainathome，andreadorchatwiththeladiesofhisfamily，wouldbeconsideredaboreandunmanly。
　　ThereseemstobenoplaceinanAmericanhouseforitshead。
　　MorethanoncewhenthefriendIhavereferredtohasaskedme，attheclub，todineinformallywithhim，wehavefound，onarriving，thatMadame，havinganeveningoff，hadgonetobedandforgottentoorderanydinner，sowewereobligedtoreturntotheclubforourmeal。When，however，hiswifeisingoodhealth，sheexpectsherwearyhusbandtoaccompanyhertodinner，opera，orball，nightafternight，obliviousoftheworkthemorrowholdsinstoreforhim。
　　InonefamilyIknow，paterfamiliasgoesbythenameofthe"purse。"ThemoreoneseesofAmericanhouseholdsthemoreappropriatethatnameappears。Everythingisexpectedofthehusband，andheisaccordednodefiniteplaceinreturn。Heleavesthehouseat8。30。Whenhereturns，atfive，ifhiswifeisentertainingamanattea，itwouldbeconsideredtheheightofindelicacyforhimtointrudeuponthem，forhisarrivalwouldcastachillontheconversation。Whenacoupledineout，thehusbandisalwaysLABETENOIREofthehostess，nowomanwantingtositnexttoamarriedman，ifshecanhelpit。
　　ThefewBenedictswhohavehadthecouragetobreakawayfromtheseconditionsandamusethemselveswithyachts，salmonrivers，or"grass—bachelor"tripstoEurope，whilesecretlyadmiredbythewomen，arefrowneduponinsocietyasdangerousexamples，likelytosowtheseedsofdiscontentamongtheircomrades；althoughitisthecommonestthingintheworldforanAmericanwifetotakethechildrenandgoabroadonatour。
　　ImagineaGermanorItalianwifeannouncingtoherspousethatshehaddecidedtorunovertoEnglandforayearwithherchildren，thattheymightlearnEnglish。Themindrecoilsinhorrorfromtheideaofthecatastrophethatwouldensue。
　　Glancearoundaball—room，adinnerparty，ortheopera，ifyouhaveanydoubtsastotheunselfishnessofourmarriedmen。Howmanyofthemdoyousupposearepresentfortheirownpleasure？Theownerofanoperaboxrarelyretainsaseatinhisexpensivequarters。Yougenerallyfindhimidlinginthelobbieslookingathiswatch，orrepairingtoaneighboringconcerthalltopassthewearyhours。Ataballitisevenworse。Onewonderswhycard—roomsarenotprovidedatlargeballs（asisthecustomabroad），wheretheboredhusbandsmightfindalittlesolaceover"bridge，"insteadofyawninginthecoat—roomormakingdesperatesignstotheirwivesfromthedoorway，—signalsofdistress，bythebye，thatrarelyproduceanyeffect。
　　Itistherebellioushusbandwhoisadmiredandcourted，however。Acurioustraitofhumannaturecompelsadmirationforwhateverisharmful，andforcesus，inspiteofourbetterjudgment，todepreciatetheusefulandbeneficent。Thecoats—
　　of—armsofallcountriesarecrowdedwitheaglesandlions，thatneveryetdidanygood，livingordead；oratorsenlargeonthefinequalitiesofthesebirdsandbeasts，andholdthemupasmodels，whileusingastermsofreproachthenameofthegooseorthecow，creaturesthatministerinahundredwaystoourwants。Suchaspirithasbroughthelpful，productive"betterhalves"tothehumbleplacetheynowoccupyintheeyesofourpeople。
　　Aslongasmenpassedtheirtimeinfightingandcarousingtheywereheroes；assoonastheybecamepatientbread—winnersalltheromanceevaporatedfromtheiratmosphere。TheJewishHerculeshadhisrevengeintheendandmadethingsdisagreeableforhistormentors。Sofar，however，therearenosignsofarevoltamongtheshornlambsinthiscountry。
　　Theypatientlybendtheirneckstothecollar—thekindest，mostlovinganddevotedhelpmatesthateverploddedunderthematrimonialyoke。
　　WhenintheEast，onewatcheswithadmirationthepartadonkeyplaysintheeconomyofthoseprimitivelands。Alltheworkisreservedforthatindustriousanimal，andlittleplayfallstohisshare。Thecamelisalwaysbad—tempered，andwhenoverladenliesdown，refusingtomoveuntilrelievedofitsburden。TheTurkislazyandselfish，thenativewomenpasstheirtimeinchatteringandgiggling，thechildrenplayandsquabble，theubiquitousdogsleepsinthesun；butfromdaybreaktomidnightthelittlemouse—coloreddonkeystoilunceasingly。Allburdenstoobulkyortoocumbersomeformanareputonhisback；theprovenderwhichhorsesandcamelshaverefusedbecomeshisportion；heisthefirsttobegintheday’slabor，andthelasttoturnin。ItisimpossibletolivelongintheOrientorthesouthofFrancewithoutbecomingattachedtothosegentle，willinganimals。Therolewhichhonest"Bourico"fillssowellabroadisplayedonthissideoftheAtlanticbytheAmericanhusband。
　　Imeannodisrespecttomymarriedcompatriots；onthecontrary，IadmirethemasIdoalldocile，unselfishbeings。
　　Itiswellforourwomen，however，thattheirlords，likethelittleOrientaldonkeys，ignoretheirstrength，andarecontenttotoilontotheendoftheirdays，expectingneitherpraisenorthanksinreturn。
　　Chapter14—"CAROLUS"
　　INtheearlyseventiesagroupofstudents—dissatisfiedwiththecut—and—driedinstructionoftheParisartschoolandattractedbycertainqualitiesofcolorandtechniqueintheworkofayoungFrenchmanfromthecityofLille，whowasjustbeginningtoattracttheattentionofconnoisseurs—wentinabodytohisstudiowiththerequestthathewouldoverseetheirworkanddirecttheirstudies。TheartistthuschosenwasCarolus—Duran。Oddlyenough，amajorityoftheyouthswhosoughthimoutandmadehimtheirmasterwereAmericans。
　　ThefirstmodestworkroomontheBoulevardMontparnassewassoontoosmalltoholdthepupilswhocrowdedunderthisnewlyraisedbanner，andamovewasmadetomorecommodiousquartersnearthemaster’sprivatestudio。Sargent，Dannat，Harrison，Beckwith，Hinckley，andmanyotherswhomitisneedlesstomentionhere，will—iftheselinescomeundertheirnotice—
　　doubtlessrecallwithathrillofpleasuretheroomyone—
　　storiedstructureintherueNotre—DamedesChampswhereweestablishedourATELIERD’ELEVES，aself—supportingcooperativeconcern，eachstudentcontributingtenfrancsamonthtowardrent，fire，andmodels，"Carolus"—thenamebywhichthismasterisuniversallyknownabroad—notonlyrefusingallcompensation，accordingtotheimmutablecustomofFrenchpaintersofdistinction，but，aswediscoveredlater，contributingtoooftenfromhisownpockettohelpouttheMASSIERattheendofadifficultseason，orsmooththepathofsomeimprovidentpupil。
　　Thosewerecloudless，enchanteddayswepassedinthetumbleddownoldatelier：anardentspringtimeoflifewhenthefuturebeckonsgaylyandnodoubtsofsuccessobscurethehorizon。
　　Ouryoungmaster’senthusiasmfiredhiscircleofpupils，who，aseachsucceedingyearbroughthimincreasingfame，revelledinareflectedglorywiththegenerousadmirationofyouth，inwhichthereisneithercalculationnorshadowofenvy。
　　AportraitofMadamedePortalais，exhibitedaboutthistime，drewallart—lovingParisaroundthenewcelebrity’scanvas。
　　Shortlyafter，thegovernmentpurchasedapainting（ofourmaster’sbeautifulwife），nowknownasLAFEMMEAUGANT，fortheLuxembourgGallery。
　　Itisdifficulttooverestimatetheimpetusthatamaster’ssuccessesimparttotheprogressofhispupils。MyfirststudiousyearinParishadbeenpassedintheshadowofanelderlypainter，whowascomfortablydozingonthelaurelsofthirtyyearsbefore。ThechangefromthatsleepyenvironmenttothevividenthusiasmanddashofCarolus—Duran’sstudiowaslikesteppingoutofamustycloisterintothewarmthandmovementofamarket—place。
　　Here，beitsaidinpassing，liesperhapsthesecretofthedryrotthattoooftensettlesonourAmericanartschools。
　　We，forsomeunknownreason，donottaketheworkofnativepaintersseriously，norencouragetheminproportiontotheirmerit。Inconsequencetheyretainbutafeebleholdupontheirpupils。
　　Carolus，handsome，young，successful，courted，wasanidealleaderforabandofambitious，high—strungyouths，repayingtheirdevotionwithanuntiringinterestandliftingcleveranddullalikeonthestrongwingsofhisgenius。Hisvisitstothestudio，onwhichhisfriendHenneroftenaccompaniedhim，werefrequentandprolonged；certainTuesdaysbeingespeciallyappreciatedbyus，astheyweresetapartforhiscriticismoforiginalcompositions。
　　Whenoursketches（thesubjectforwhichhadbeengivenoutinadvance）werearranged，andwehadseatedourselvesinabighalf—circleonthefloor，Caroluswouldinstallhimselfonatallstool，theoneseatthestudioboasted，andchatAPROPOS
　　oftheworksbeforehimoncomposition，onclassicart，onthetheoriesofcolorandclair—obscur。Brillianttalks，inlaidwithmuchwitandincisivecriticism，thememoryofwhichmustlingerinthemindsofallwhowerefortunateenoughtohearthem。Norwasittothestudioalonethatourmaster’sinterestfollowedus。HewoulddropinattheLouvre，whenwewerecopyingthere，andaftersomepleasantwordsofadviceandencouragement，leadusoffforastrollthroughthegalleries，interruptedbystationsbeforehisfavoritemasterpieces。
　　SoimportanthashealwaysconsideredaconstantstudyofRenaissanceartthatrecently，whenabouttocommencehisTRIUMPHOFBACCHUS，CaroluscopiedoneofRubens’slargercanvaseswithallthenaiveteofabeginner。
　　AnoccasionsoonpresenteditselfforustolearnanothersideofourtradebyworkingwithourmasteronaceilingorderedofhimbythestateforthePalaceoftheLuxembourg。ThevaststudioswhichthecityofParisprovidesonoccasionsofthiskind，withaliberalitythatshouldmakeourhomecorporationsreflect，aresituatedoutbeyondtheExhibitionbuildings，inacurious，unfrequentedquarter，ignoredalikebyParisiansandtourists，wherethecitystorescompromisingstatuesandthevaluabledebrisofhermanyrevolutions。
　　There，amongthronelessNapoleonsandriderlessbronzesteeds，wetoiledforoversixmonthssidebysidewithourmaster，ongiganticAPOTHEOSISOFMARIEDEMEDICIS，servinginturnaspainterandpainted，andleavingtheimprintofourhandsandthereflectionofourfacesscatteredaboutthecomposition。
　　Dayafterday，whenworkwasover，wewouldhoistthebigcanvasbymeansofasystemofropesandpulleys，fromaperpendiculartothehorizontalpositionitwastooccupypermanently，andthensitstrainingournecksanddiscussingtheprogressoftheworkuntilthetardyspringtwilightwarnedustodepart。
　　Theyear1877broughtCarolus—DurantheMEDAILLED’HONNEUR，acrowningrecompensethatsettheateliermadwithdelight。Weimmediatelyorganizedagreat（buteconomical）banquettocommemoratetheevent，overwhichourmasterpresided，withmuchmodesty，consideringtheamountofincenseweburnedbeforehim，andthespeecheswemade。OneofournumberevenburstintosomeverybadFrenchverses，assertingthatthepaintersoftheworldingeneralfellbackbeforehim—……EPOUVANTES—
　　CRAIGNANTEGALEMENTSABROSSEETSONEPEE。
　　Thisallusiontohisproficiencyinfencingwasconsideredparticularlyneat，andbecamethefavoritesongofthestudio，tobehowledinandoutofseason。
　　Curiouslyenough，thereisalwayssomethinginCarolus—Duran’sattitudewhenatworkwhichrecallstheswordsman。Withanenormouspaletteinonehandandabrushintheother，hehasawayofplantinghimselfinfrontofhissitterthatisamusinglysuggestiveofaduel。Hislithebodyswaystoandfro，hisfineleoninefacequiverswiththeintensestudyofhismodel；thenwithasuddenspringforward，afewrapidtouchesaredashedonthecanvas（likehomestrokesintheenemy’sweakestspot）withaprecisionofhandacquiredonlybylongyearsoffencing。
　　AnordertopaintthekingandqueenofPortugalwasthenextstepontheroadtofame，anotherrungonthepleasantladderofsuccess。Whenthisworkwasdonethedelightedsovereignpresentedthepainterwiththeorderof"ChristofPortugal，"
　　togetherwithmanyothergifts，amongwhichacaricatureofthemasteratwork，signedbyhissitter，isnottheleastvalued。
　　WhenthegreatschismoccurredseveralyearsagowhichrenttheartworldofFrance，Carolus—Duranwaselectedvice—
　　presidentofthenewschoolunderMeissonier，towhoseofficehesucceededonthatmaster’sdeath；andnowdirectsandpresidesovertheyearlyexhibitionknownastheSALONDU
　　CHAMPDEMARS。
　　AthischateaunearParisoratSaintRaphael，ontheMediterranean，themasterlives，likeLeonardoofold，theexistenceofagrandseigneur，surroundedbyhisfamily，innumerableguests，andthehorsesanddogsheloves，—agroupofwhichhisornatefigureandexpressivefaceformthenaturalcentre。Eachyearhelivesmoreawayfromtheworld，butnomoreinspiritingsightcanbeimaginedthanthewelcomethepresidentreceivesofa"varnishing"day，whenhemakeshisentrysurroundedbyhispupils。Thestudentscheerthemselveshoarse，andthepublicclimbsoneverythingthatcomestohandtoseehimpass。Itishardtorealizethenthatthisisthesamemanwho，notcontentwithhisyouthfulprogress，retiredintoanItalianmonasterythathemightcommunefacetofacewithnatureundisturbed。
　　Theworksofnootherpaintergivemethesamesensationofquiveringvitality，excepttheVelasquezintheMadridGalleryand，perhaps，Sargentathisbest；andonefeelsallthroughtheAmericanpainter’sworktheinfluenceofhisfirstandonlymaster。
　　"TOUTCEQUIN’ESTPASINDISPENSABLEESTNUISIBLE，"aphrasewhichisoftenonCarolus—Duran’slips，maybetakenasthekeynoteofhiswork，whereonefindsanoblesimplicityoflineandcolorscheme，aneliminationofuselessdetail，acontemptfortrickstoenforceaneffect，andaboveallacomprehensionandmasteryoflight，vitality，andtexture—
　　thosethreeunitiesofthepainter’sart—thatbringhiscanvasesveryneartothoseofhisself—imposedSpanishmaster。
　　ThosewhoknowtheFrenchpainter’smoreimportantworksandhismanysplendidstudiesfromthenude，feelitapitythatsuchmasterpiecesastheequestrianportraitofMlle。
　　Croisette，oftheComedieFrancaise，theREVEIL，thesuperbfulllengthofMme。PelouseontheTerraceofChenonceau，andtheheadofGounodintheLuxembourg，couldnotbecollectedintooneexhibition，thatloversofarthereinAmericamightrealizeforthemselveshowthismaster’sworksareoftheclassthattypifyaschoolandanepoch，andengravetheirauthor’snameamongthosedestinedtobecomehouseholdwordsinthemouthsoffuturegenerations。
　　Chapter15—TheGrandOperaFadWITHOUTbeingmorecuriousthanmyneighbors，thereareseveralsocialmysteriesthatIshouldliketofathom，amongothers，therealreasonsthatinducethedifferentclassesofpeopleoneseesattheoperatoattendthatformofentertainment。
　　Atasteforthetheatreisnaturalenough。Itisalsoeasytounderstandwhypeoplewhoarefondofsportandanimalsenjoyracesanddogshows。Butthecontinuedvogueofgrandopera，andmoreespeciallyofWagner’slong—drawn—outcompositions，amongourrestless，unmusicalcompatriots，remainsunexplained。
　　Thesheeplikedocilityofourpublicisapparentinnumberlessways；innone，however，morestrikinglythanintheirchoiceofamusements。Inbusinessandreligion，peopleoccasionallythinkforthemselves；intheselectionofentertainments，never！butareapparentlycontenttoreceivetheiropinionsandprejudicesready—madefromsomeunseenandomnipotentAreopagus。
　　Thecarefulstudyofanoperaaudiencefromdifferentpartsofourauditoriumhasbroughtmetotheconclusionthatthepublictheremaybelooselydividedintothreeclasses—
　　leavingoutreportersoffashionableintelligence，dressmakersinsearchofideas，andtheladyinhabitantsof"CrankAlley"
　　（asacertaincorneroftheorchestraiscalled），whositinperpetualadorationbeforetheelderlytenor。
　　First—butbeforeventuringfurtherondangerouslythinice，itmaybeaswelltosuggestthatthissubjectisnottreatedinabsoluteseriousness，andthatallassertionsmustnotbetakenAUPIEDDELALETTRE。First，then，andmostimportant，comethestockholders，forwithoutthemtheMetropolitanwouldclose。Themajorityofthesefortunatepeopleandtheirguestslookupontheoperaasasocialfunction，whereonecanmeetone’sfriendsandbeseen，anentertainingantechamberinwhichtolingeruntilit’stimeto"goon，"herBoxbeingto—
　　dayasnecessaryapartofagreatlady’soutfitasacountryhouseoraball—room。
　　Secondarethosewhoattendbecauseithasbecomethecorrectthingtobeseenattheopera。Thereissomuchwealthinthiscityandsolittleopportunityforitsdisplay，somanypeoplelongtogoaboutwhoareaskednowhere，thattheoperahasbeenseizeduponasacentreinwhichtoairrichapparelandelbowthe"world。"Thislistfillsalargepartofthecloselypackedparquetandfirstbalcony。
　　Third，andlast，cometheloversofmusic，whomostlyinhabitgreateraltitudes。
　　Themotiveofthetypicalbox—ownerissimple。Hernightattheoperaistheexcuseforacosylittledinner，onewomanfriend（twowouldspoiltheeffectofthebox）andfourmen，withoutcountingthehusband，whoappearsatdinner，butrarelygoesfurther。Thepleasantmealandthesubsequentsmokeareprolongeduntil9or9。30，whenthemenarefinallydraggedmurmuringfromtheircigars。IfshehasbeenfortunateandtimedherarrivaltocorrespondwithanENTR’ACTE，myladyisradiant。Thelightsareup，shecanseewhoarepresent，andthepubliccaninspecthertoiletandjewelsasshesettlesherselfunderthecombinedgazeofthehouse，andproceedstoholdaninformalreceptionfortherestoftheevening。Themenshehasbroughtwithherquicklycedetheirplacestocallers，andwanderyawninginthelobbyorinvadetheneighboringboxesandaddtheirvoicestothegeneralmurmur。
　　Althoughthereismuchlesstalkingthanformerly，itisthetolerationofthiscustomatallbythepublicthatindicates（alongwithmanyotherstraws）thatwearenotamusic—lovingpeople。AudibleconversationduringaperformancewouldnotbeallowedforamomentbyaContinentalaudience。ThelittlevisitingthattakesplaceinboxesabroadisdoneduringtheENTR’ACTES，whenpeopleretiretothesalonsbackoftheirLOGEStoeaticesandchat。Herethoselittleparlorsareturnedintocloak—rooms，andsmalltalkgoesoninmanyboxesduringtheentireperformance。Thejokeorscandalofthedayisdiscussed；strangersintown，orliteraryandartisticlights—"freaks，"theyarediscriminatinglycalled—arepointedout，toiletspassedinreview，andthosedreadfultwohourspassedwhich，forsomeundiscoveredreason，mustelapsebetweenadinnerandadance。Ifafavoritetenorissinging，andnoonehappenstobewhisperingnonsenseoverhershoulder，myladymaylisteninadistraitway。Itisnotsafe，however，tocountonprolongedattentionoraskherquestionsabouttheperformance。Sheisapttobeabithazyastowhoissinging，andwiththeexceptionofFAUSTandCARMEN，hasrudimentaryideasaboutplots。Singerscomeandgo，weep，swoon，orarekilled，withoutinterferingwithherequanimity。Shehas，forinstance，seentheHUGUENOTSandtheRHEINGOLDdozensoftimes，butknowsnomorewhyRaoulisbroughtblindfoldedtoChenonceaux，orwhatWotanandErdasaytoeachotherintheirinterminablescenes，thanshedoesofthecontentsoftheVedas。Forthematterofthat，ifthreeorfourprincipalairsweresuppressedfromanoperaandthesceneryandcostumeschanged，manyinthatchatteringcirclewould，Ifear，notknowwhattheywerelisteningto。
　　Lastwinter，whenMelbasanginAIDA，disguisedbydarkhairandabrownskin，aladynearmevouchsafedtheopinionthatthe"littleblackwomanhadn’tabadvoice；"agentleman（towhomIremarkedlastweek"thatasSembrichhadsungRosinaintheBARBER，itwasratherashocktoseeherappearasthatlady’sservantintheMARIAGEDEFIGARO"）lookedhisblankamazementuntilitwasexplainedtohimthatoneofthoseoperaswasacontinuationoftheother。Afterapauseheremarked，"Theyarenotbythesamecomposer，anyway！Becausethefirst’sbyRossini，andtheMARIAGEisbyBonMarche。
　　I’vebeenathisshopinParis。"
　　Thepresenceofthesecondcategory—thewould—befashionablepeople—isnotsoeasilyaccountedfor。Theirattendancecanhardlybeattributedtoloveofmelody，astheyare，ifanything，ashadelessmusicalthanthebox—dwellers，who，bythebye，seemtoexerciseanirresistiblefascination，tojudgebythetrendofconversationanddirectionofglasses。
　　Althoughanimposingandsufficientlyattentivethrong，itwouldbedifficulttofindalessdiscriminatingpublicthanthatwhichgathersnightlyintheMetropolitanparterre。Onewondershowmanyofthosepeoplecareformusicandhowmanyattendbecauseitisexpensiveand"swell。"
　　Theywilllistenwiththesameblandcontentmenttoeitherbadorgoodperformancessolongasaworld—renownedartist（someonewhoisbeingpaidacomfortablelittlefortunefortheevening）isonthestage。Theorchestramaybebadlyled（itoftenis）；thesingersmayflat—orbeoutofvoice；theperformancemaygoallatsixesandsevens—thereisneveramurmurofdissent。FaultsthatwouldsetanentireaudienceatNaplesorMilanhissingareacceptedherewithignorantapproval。
　　Theunfortunatepartofitisthatthisweaknessofourshasbecomeknown。ThesingersfeeltheycangiveanAmericanaudienceanyslipshodperformance。Ihaveseenafavoritesopranoshrughershouldersassheenteredherdressing—roomandexclaim："MONDIEU！HowIshuffledthroughthatact！
　　They’dhavehootedmeoffthestageinBerlin，butherenooneseemstocare。Didyounoticethebaritoneto—night？Hewasn’tonthekeyonceduringourduo。Icannotsingmybest，tryasIwill，whenIhearthepublicapplaudinggoodandbadalike！"
　　Itisstrangethatourpleasure—lovingrichpeopleshouldhavehitontheoperaasafavoritehaunt。WeandtheEnglisharetheonlyracewhowillattendperformancesinaforeignlanguagewhichwedon’tunderstand。Howcanintelligentpeoplewhodon’tcareformusicgoon，seasonafterseason，listeningtooperas，theplotsofwhichtheyignore，andwhichintheirheartstheyfinddull？
　　Isitsoveryamusingtowatchtwomiddle—agedladiesnaggingeachother，attwoo’clockinthemorning，onapublicsquare，astheydoinLOHENGRIN？DopeoplefindthelecturethatIsolde’shusbanddeliverstotheguiltyloversentertaining？
　　Doesanoperaproduceanyillusiononmyneighbors？Iwishitdidonme！Iseetooplainlythepaintonthesingers’hotfacesandthecordsstrainingintheirtiredthroats！Isitoncertainnightsinagony，fearingtoseestoutRomeorollonthestageinapoplexy！Thesopranos，too，haveaway，whenabouttoemitaroulade，thatismoresuggestiveofadentist’schair，andtheattendantgargle，thanofalovephrase。
　　Whentwocelebritiescombineinafinalduo，facingthepublicandnoteachother，theygivetheimpressionofvictimswhomanunseeninquisitoristorturing。Eachturnofhisscrewdrawsoutawildercry。Theorchestra（inthepayofthedemon）doesallitcantopreventtheirshrieksfromreachingthepublic。Theloversinturnredoubletheirefforts；theyarepurpleinthefaceandglisteningwithperspiration。
　　Defeat，theyknow，isbeforethem，fortheorchestrahasthegreaterstayingpower！Theflutesbleat；thetrombonesgrunt；
　　thefiddlessqueal；anepilepticleadercutswildlyintotheairabouthim。When，finally，theirstrengthexhausted，thebreathlesshumanbeings，withonelastear—piercingnote，giveupthestruggleandretire，thepublic，excitedbytheunequalcontest，burstsintothundersofapplause。
　　Whywouldn’titbeagoodidea，inordertoavoidthesepainfulexhibitions，tohaveanarrangementofscreens，withthesingingpeoplebehindandacompanyofyoungandattractivepantomimistsgoingthroughthegesturesandmovementsinfront？Otherwise，howcanthemostimaginativenatureslosethemselvesatanopera？Evenwhenthesingersarecomely，thereisalwaysthateternaldoublerowofstony—
　　facedwitnessesinfullview，whomnocrimesastonishandnomisfortunesmelt。IttakesmostofthepoetryoutofFaust’sfirstwordswithMarguerite，tohavethatshortinterviewinterruptedbyalineofold，wearywomenshouting，"Letuswhirlinthewaltzo’erthemountandtheplain！"OrwhenScotchLucyappearsinasmarttea—gownandisgoodenoughtoperformdifficultexercisesbeforeahalf—circleofItaliangentlemeninpantaletsandladiesincourtcostumes，doesshegiveanyonetheillusionofanabandonedwifedyingofabrokenheartaloneintheHighlands？Brokenheart，indeed！
　　It’smuchmorelikelyshe’lldieofarupturedblood—vessel！
　　Philistinesinmattersmusical，likemyself，unfortunatemortalswhomthesweetestsoundsfailtoenthrallwhenconnectedwithnomemoryoridea，orwhenprolongedbeyondalimitedperiod，mustapproachthethirdgroupwithhesitationandawe。Thattheyaresincere，isevident。Theraptexpressionsoftheirfaces，andtheirpatience，beartestimonytothisfact。ForalongtimeIaskedmyself，"WherehaveI
　　seenthatintense，absorbedattitudebefore？"Suddenlyoneeveninganothersceneroseinmymemory。
　　HaveyouevervisitedTangiers？Inthemarket—placeofthatcityyouwillfindtheinhabitantscrouchedbyhundredsaroundtheirnativemusicians。Whenwewerethere，oneoldduffer—
　　theWagner，doubtless，oftheplace—washavinganimmensesuccess。Nomatteratwhathourofthedaywepassedthroughthatsquare，therewasalwaysthesamespellboundcircleofhalf—cladTurksandArabssquattingsilentwhile"Wagner"
　　tinkledtothemonathree—stringedluteandchantedinahigh—pitched，dismalwhine—likethesqueakingofanunfasteneddoorinthewind。Attimes，fornoapparentreason，thenever—varying，never—endingmeasurewouldbeinterruptedbyaflutterofapplause，buthisaudienceremainedmostlysunkinahypnoticapathy。Ineverseea"Ring"audiencenowwithoutthinkingofthatsceneoutsidetheBab—el—Marsagate，whichhasledmetoaskdifferentpeoplejustwhatsensationsseriousmusicproduceduponthem。Theanswershavebeenvariedandinteresting。OnegoodladywhorarelymissesaGermanoperaconfessedthatsweetsoundsacteduponherlikeopium。Neitherscenerynoractingnorplotwereofanyimportance。Fromthefirstnotesoftheoverturetotheend，shefloatedinanecstaticdream，obliviousoftimeandplace。Whenitwasovershecamebacktoherselffaintwithfatigue。AnotherprofessedloverofWagnersaidthathisgreatestpleasurewasinfollowingthedifferent"motives"astheyrecurredinthemusic。Myfaithinthatgentlemanwasshaken，however，whenIfoundtheothereveningthathehadmistakenVanDyckforJeandeReszkethroughanentireperformance。Hemaybeadabatrecognizinghisfriendsthe"motives，"buthisdiscoveriesdon’tapparentlygoasfarastenors！
　　NoonedoubtsthathundredsofpeopleunaffectedlyloveGermanopera，butthatasmanyaffecttoappreciateitinordertoappearintellectualiscertain。
　　Onceuponatimetheunworthymemberofanultra—serious"Browning"classinthiscity，doubtingthesincerityofhercompanions，askedpermissiontoreadthemapoemofthemaster’swhichshefoundbeyondhercomprehension。Whenthereadingwasovertheopinionofherfriendswasunanimous。
　　"Nothingcouldbesimpler！Thelineswerelucidityitself！
　　Suchclosereasoningetc。"Butdismayfelluponthemwhenthenaughtyladyannounced，withapealoflaughter，thatshehadbeenreadingalternatelinesfromoppositepages。Shenolongerdisturbstheharmonyofthatcircle！
　　Bearingthistaleinmind，Ionceaskedamusicianwhatproportionoftheaudienceata"Ring"performancehethoughtwouldknowifalternatescenesweregivenfromtwoofWagner’soperas，unlessthesceneryenlightenedthem。Hisestimatewasthatperhapsfiftypercentmightfindoutthefraud。Heputthenumberofpeoplewhocouldgiveanintelligentaccountofthoseplotsataboutthirtyperhundred。
　　Thepopularityofmusic，headded，islargelyduetothefactthatitsavespeoplethetroubleofthinking。Pleasantsoundssoothethenerves，and，ifprolongedlongenoughinadarkenedroomwill，liketheEasterntom—toms，lullthesensesintoamildformoftrance。Thismustbewhatthegentlemanmeantwhosaidhewishedhecouldsleepaswellina"Wagner"carashedidatoneofhisoperas！
　　Beingataillessoldfox，Ilookwithever—increasingsuspiciononthetoo—luxuriantcaudalappendagesofmyneighbors，andthinkwithamusementofthemultitudeswhoduringthelasttenyearshavesacrificedthemselvesuponthealtarofgrandopera—simple，kindlysouls，withlittleornotasteforclassicalmusic，whohavesatinthedark（mentallyandphysically），applaudingwhattheydidn’tunderstand，andlisteningtovagueGermanmythologysettosoundsthatappeartousoutsiderslikemusicsunkintoaverbosedotage。IamconvincedthegreaternumberwouldhavepreferredajollyperformanceofMME。ANGOTortheCLOCHESDECORNEVILLE，cutintwobyagoodballet。
　　Itis，however，soeasytobemistakenonsubjectsofthiskindthatgeneralizingisdangerous。Manygreatauthoritieshavelikedtunelessmusic。Oneofthemosttellingargumentsinitsfavorwasrecentlyadvancedbyaforeigner。TheChineseambassadortolduslastwinterinaclubatWashingtonthatWagner’swastheonlyEuropeanmusicthatheappreciatedandenjoyed。"Yousee，"headded，"musicisamucholderartwithusthaninEurope，andhasnaturallyreachedafargreaterperfection。TheGermanschoolhasmadealongstepinadvance，andIcannowforeseeadaynotfardistantwhen，underitsinfluence，yourmusicwillcloselyresembleourown。"
　　Chapter16—ThePoeticCABARETSofParisTHOSEwhohavenotlivedinFrancecanformlittleideaoftheimportantplacetheCAFEoccupiesinthelifeofanaverageFrenchman，clubsasweknowthemorastheyexistinEnglandbeingrare，andwhenfoundbeing，withfewexceptions，butgambling—housesindisguise。AsaFrenchmanrarelyasksanacquaintance，orevenafriend，tohisapartment，theCAFEhasbecomethecommongroundwhereallmeet，forbusinessorpleasure。NotinParisonly，butalloverFrance，ineverygarrisontown，provincialcity，ortinyvillage，theCAFEisthechiefattraction，thecentreofthought，thefocustowardwhichalltheraysofmasculineexistenceconverge。
　　Forthestudent，newlyarrivedfromtheprovinces，towhosemodestpursethetheatresandotherplacesofamusementarepracticallyclosed，theCAFEisasupremeresource。Hismindismoulded，hisideasandopinionsformed，morebywhathehearsandseestherethanbyanyotherinfluence。A
　　restaurantisoflittleimportance。Onemayeatanywhere。
　　ButthechoiceofhisCAFEwilloftengivethebenttoayoungman’scareer，andindicatehisexactshadeofpoliticsandhisopinionsonliterature，music，orart。InParis，toknowamanatallistoknowwhereyoucanfindhimatthehouroftheAPERITIF—whatBaudelairecalledL’HEURESAINTE
　　DEL’ABSINTHE。
　　Whenyoungmenformasocietyamongthemselves，aCAFEischosenastheirmeeting—place。Thousandsofestablishmentsexistonlybysuchpatronage，as，forexample，theCafedelaRegence，PlaceduTheatreFrancais，whichisfrequentedentirelybymenwhoplaychess。
　　Businessmentransacttheiraffairsasmuchovertheircoffeeasintheiroffices。ThereadingmanfindsathisCAFEthedailyandweeklypapers；awriterissureoftheundisturbedpossessionofpen，ink，andpaper。HenriMurger，theauthor，whenaskedoncewhyhecontinuedtopatronizeacertainestablishmentnotoriousfortheinferiorqualityofitsbeer，answered，"Yes，thebeerispoor，buttheykeepsuchgoodINK！"
　　TheuseofaCAFEdoesnotimplyanygreatexpenditure，aCONSUMMATIONcostingbutlittle。Withitisacquiredtherighttousetheestablishmentforanindefinitenumberofhours，theclientbeingwarmed，lighted，andserved。Fromfivetoseven，andagainafterdinner，theHABITUESstrollin，groupingthemselvesaboutthesmalltables，eachnew—comerjoiningacongenialcircle，orderinghisdrink，andsettlinghimselfforalongsitting。Thelasteditorial，thenewestpicture，orthefallofaministryisdiscussedwithavehemenceandaninterestunknowntoAnglo—Saxonnatures。
　　Suddenly，intheexcitementofthediscussion，someonewillriseinhisplaceandbeginspeaking。Ifyouhappentodropinatthatmoment，theladyatthedeskwillwelcomeyouwith，"Youarejustintime！MonsieurSo—and—Soisspeaking；theeveningpromisestobeinteresting。"Sheischarmed；herestablishmentwillshinewithareflectedlight，andnewpatronsbedrawnthere，ifthedebatesarebrilliant。Souniversalisthiscustomthatthereishardlyanoratorto—dayattheFrenchbarorintheSenate，whohasnotbrokenhisfirstlanceinsomesuchobscuretournament，underthesmilingglancesoftheDAMEDUCOMPTOIR。
　　OppositethePalaceoftheLuxembourg，intheheartoftheoldLatinQuarter，standsaquaintbuilding，halfhotel，halfCAFE，wheremanyyearsagoJosephII。residedwhilevisitinghissister，MarieAntoinette。ItisknownnowasFoyot’s；
　　thisnamemustawakenmanyhappymemoriesintheheartsofAmericanstudents，foritwaslongtheirfavoritemeeting—
　　place。Intheearlyseventiesaclub，formedamongtheliteraryandpoeticyouthofParis，selectedFoyot’sastheir"home"duringthewintermonths。TheirsummervacationswerespentinvisitingtheuniversitytownsofFrance，recitingverses，oractinginoriginalplaysatNancy，Bordeaux，Lyons，orCaen。TheenthusiasmtheseyouthfulperformancescreatedinspiredoneoftheirnumberwiththeideaofcreatinginParis，onapermanentfooting，acentrewherealimitedpubliccouldmeettheyoungpoetsofthedayandhearthemrecitetheirversesandmonologuesinaninformalway。