首页 >出版文学> The Hunchback>第1章

第1章

  INTRODUCTION
  JamesSheridanKnowleswasbornatCorkin1784,anddiedatTorquayinDecember,1862,attheageof78。Hisfatherwasateacherofelocution,whocompiledadictionary,andwhowasrelatedtotheSheridans。HemovedtoLondonwhenhissonwaseightyearsold,andtherebecameacquaintedwithWilliamHazlittandCharlesLamb。Theson,afterhisschooleducation,obtainedacommissioninthearmy,butgaveupeverythingforthestage,andmadehisfirstappearanceattheCrowStreetTheatre,inDublin。Hedidnotbecomeagreatactor,andwhenhetooktowritingplayshedidnotprovehimselfagreatpoet,buthisskillincontrivingsituationsthroughwhichagoodactorcanmakehispowerstelluponthepublic,wontheheartofthegreatactorofhisday,andasMacready’sownpoetherosetofame。
  BeforeMacreadyhaddiscoveredhim,SheridanKnowleslivedpartlybyteachingelocutionatBelfastandGlasgow,partlybypracticeofelocutionasanactor。In1815heproducedattheBelfastTheatrehisfirstplay,CaiusGracchus。Hisnextplay,VirginiuswasproducedatGlasgowwithgreatsuccess。Macready,whohad,attheageofseventeen,begunhiscareerasanactorathisfather’stheatreinBirmingham,had,onMonday,October5th,1819,attheageoftwenty-six,takentheLondonersbystorminthecharacterofRichardIIICoventGardenreopeneditsclosedtreasury。ItwaspromptlyfollowedbyasuccessinCoriolanus,andMacready’splacewasmade。HewasatonceofferedfiftypoundsanightforappearingononeeveningaweekatBrighton。ItwasjustafterthatturninMacready’sfortunesthatafriendatGlasgowrecommendedtohimthepartofVirginiusinSheridanKnowles’splaylatelyproducedthere。
  Heagreedunwillinglytolookatit,andsaysthatinApril,1820,theparcelcontainingtheMS。cameashewasgoingout。Hehesitated,thensatdowntoreaditthathemightgetawearisomejobover。Asheread,hesays,"Thefreshnessandsimplicityofthedialoguefixedmyattention;Ireadonandon,andwassoonabsorbedintheinterestofthestoryandthepassionofitsscenes,tillatitscloseIfoundmyselfinsuchastateofexcitementthatforatimeIwasundecidedwhatsteptotake。Impulsewasintheascendant,andsnatchingupmypenIhurriedlywrote,asmyagitatedfeelingsprompted,alettertotheauthor,tomethenaperfectstranger。"BryanProcter(BarryCornwall)readtheplaynextdaywithMacready,andconfirmedhiminhisadmirationofit。
  Macreadyatoncegotitacceptedatthetheatre,wherenothingwasspentonscenery,buttherewasagoodcast,andtheenthusiasmofMacreadyasstagemanagerfortheoccasionhalfaffrontedsomeofhisseniors。Onthe17thofMay,1820,aboutamonthafteritcameintoMacready’shands,VirginiuswasproducedatCoventGarden,where,saystheactorinhis"Reminiscences,""thecurtainfellamidstthemostdeafeningapplauseofahighly-excitedauditory。"
  SheridanKnowles’sfame,therefore,wasmade,likethatofhisfriendMacready,andthefriendshipbetweenauthorandactorcontinued。SheridanKnowleshadakindlysimplicityofcharacter,andthetwoqualitiesforwhichanactormostprizesadramatist,skillinprovidingopportunitiesforactingthatwilltell,andreadinesstomakeanychangesthattheactorasksfor。ThepostscripttohisfirstlettertoMacreadywas,"Makeanyalterationsyoulikeinanypartoftheplay,andIshallbeobligedtoyou。"WhenhebroughttothegreatactorhisplayofWilliamTell——CaiusGracchushadbeenproducedinNovember,1823——therewerepassagesofwritinginitthatstoppedthecourseofaction,and,saysMacready,"Knowleshadlessofthetenacityofauthorshipthanmostwriters,"sothattherewasnodifficultyaboutalterations,Macreadyhavinginaveryhighdegreethetenacityofactorship。
  Andso,in1825,TellbecameanotherofMacready’sbestsuccesses。
  SheridanKnowlescontinuedtowriteforthestageuntil1845,whenhewasdrawnwhollyfromthetheatrebyareligiousenthusiasmthatcausedhim,in1851,toessaythebreakingofalancewithCardinalWisemanonthesubjectofTransubstantiation。SirRobertPeelgaveeasetohislatterdaysbyapensionof200poundsayearfromtheCivilList,whichhehadhonourablyearnedbyacareerasdramatist,inwhichhesoughttoappealonlytothehighersenseofliterature,andtodrawenjoymentfromthepurestsource。Ofhisplaystimetwocomedies{1}heregivenareallthathavekepttheirplaceuponthestage。Asoneofthemostearnestdramaticwritersofthepresentcenturyheisentitledtoalittlecornerinourmemory。WorseworkofthepasthaslastedlongerthantheplaysofSheridanKnowlesarelikelytolastthroughthefuture。
  H。M。
  THEHUNCHBACK。
  DRAMATISPERSONAE。
  (ASORIGINALLYPERFORMEDATCOVENTGARDENIN1832。)
  JuliaMissF。KEMBLE。
  HelenMissTAYLOR。
  MasterWalterMr。J。S。KNOWLES。
  SirThomasCliffordMr。C。KEMBLE。
  LordTinselMr。WRENCH。
  MasterWilfordMr。J。MASON。
  ModusMr。ABBOTT。
  MasterHeartwellMr。EVANS。
  GayloveMr。HENRY。
  FathomMr。MEADOWS。
  ThomasMr。BARNES。
  StephenMr。PAYNE。
  WilliamsMr。IRWIN。
  SimpsonMr。BRADY。
  WaiterMr。HEATH。
  HoldwellMr。BENDER。
  {Mr。J。COOPER。
  Servants{Mr。LOLLETT。
  ACTI。
  SCENEI。——ATavern。
  OnonesideSIRTHOMASCLIFFORD,atatable,withwinebeforehim;
  ontheother,MASTERWILFORD,GAYLOVE,HOLDWELL,andSIMPSON,likewisetakingwine。
  Wilf。Yourwine,sirs!yourwine!YoudonotjusticetominehostoftheThreeTuns,norcredittoyourselves;Iswearthebeverageisgood!ItisaspalatablepoisonasyouwillpurchasewithinamileroundLudgate!Drink,gentlemen;makefree。YouknowIamamanofexpectations;andholdmymoneyaslightasthepurseinwhichI
  carryit。
  Gay。Wedrink,MasterWilford。Notamanofushasbeenchasedasyet。
  Wilf。Butyoufillnotfairly,sirs!Lookatmymeasure!
  Whereforealargeglass,ifnotforalargedraught?Fill,Iprayyou,elseletusdrinkoutofthimbles!ThiswillneverdoforthefriendsofthenearestofkintothewealthiestpeerinBritain。
  Gay。Wegiveyoujoy,MasterWilford,oftheprospectofadvancementwhichhassounexpectedlyopenedtoyou。
  Wilf。Unexpectedlyindeed!ButyesterdayarrivedthenewsthattheEarl’sonlysonandheirhaddied;andto-dayhastheEarlhimselfbeenseizedwithamortalillness。Hisdissolutionislookedforhourly;andI,hiscousininonlythethirddegree,knowntohimbuttobeunnoticedbyhim——adecayedgentleman’sson——gladofthetitleandrevenuesofascrivener’sclerk——amtheundoubtedsuccessortohisestatesandcoronet。
  Gay。Haveyoubeensentfor?
  Wilf。No;butIhavecertifiedtohisagent,MasterWalter,theHunchback,myexistence,andpeculiarpropinquity;andmomentarilyexpecthimhere。
  Gay。Livesthereanyonethatmaydisputeyourclaim——Imeanvexatiously?
  Wilf。Notaman,MasterGaylove。Iamthesoleremainingbranchofthefamilytree。
  Gay。Doubtlessyoulookformuchhappinessfromthischangeoffortune?
  Wilf。Aworld!ThreethingshaveIanespecialpassionfor。Thefinesthound,thefinesthorse,andthefinestwifeinthekingdom,MasterGaylove!
  Gay。Thefinestwife?
  Wilf。Yes,sir;Imarry。Oncetheearldomcomesintomyline,I
  shalltakemeasurestoperpetuateitsremainingthere。Imarry,sir!IdonotsaythatIshalllove。Myhearthaschangedmistressestoooftentosettledowninoneservitudenow,sir。Butfill,Iprayyou,friends。This,ifImistakenot,isthedaywhenceIshalldatemynewfortunes;and,forthatreason,hitherhaveIinvitedyou,that,havingbeensolongmybooncompanions,youshallbethefirsttocongratulateme。
  [EnterWaiter]
  Waiter。Youarewanted,MasterWilford。
  Wilf。Bywhom?
  Waiter。OneMasterWalter。
  Wilf。Hislordship’sagent!News,sirs!Showhimin!
  [Waitergoesout]
  Myheart’saprophet,sirs——TheEarlisdead。
  [EnterMASTERWALTER]
  Well,MasterWalter。Howaccostyoume?
  Wal。Asyourimpatienceshowsmeyouwouldhaveme。
  MyLord,theEarlofRochdale!
  Gay。Giveyoujoy!
  Hold。Allhappiness,mylord!
  Simp。Longlifeandhealthuntoyourlordship!
  Gay。Come!
  We’lldrinktohislordship’shealth!’Tistwoo’clock,We’lle’encarousetillmidnight!Health,mylord!
  Hold。Mylord,muchjoytoyou!
  Simp。Allgoodtoyourlordship!
  Wal。Givesomethingtothedead!
  Gay。Givewhat?
  Wal。Respect!
  Hehasmadetheliving!Firsttohimthat’sgone,Say"Peace!"——andthenwithdecencytorevels!
  Gay。Whatmeanstheknavebyrevels?
  Wal。Knave?
  Gay。Ay,knave!
  Wal。Goto!Thou’rtflushedwithwine!
  Gay。Thousayestfalse!
  Thoughdidstthouneedaproofthouspeakesttrue,I’dgivetheeone。Thouseestbutonelordhere,AndIseetwo!
  Wal。Reflect’stthouonmyshape?
  Thouartavillain!
  Gay。[Startingup。]Ha!
  Wal。Acoward,too!
  Draw!
  [Drawinghissword。]
  Gay。Onlymarkhim!howhestrutsabout!
  Howlaughshisstraightswordathisnobleback。
  Wal。Doesit?Itcuffstheeforaliarthen!
  [StrikesGAYLOVEwithhissword。]
  Gay。Ablow!
  Wal。Another,lestyoudoubtthefirst!
  Gay。Hisbloodonhisownhead!I’mforyou,sir!
  [Draws。]
  Clif。Hold,sir!Thisquarrel’smine!
  [Comingforwardanddrawing。]
  Wal。Nomanshallfightforme,sir!
  Clif。Byyourleave,Yourpatience,pray!Mylord,forsoIlearnBehovesmetoaccostyou——foryourownsakeDrawoffyourfriend!
  Wal。Nottillwehaveabout,sir!
  Clif。Mylord,yourhappyfortuneillyougreet!
  Illgreetitthosewholoveyou——greetingthusTheheraldofit!
  Wal。Sir,what’sthattoyou?
  Letgomysleeve!
  Clif。Mylord,ifbloodbeshedOnthefairdawnofyourprosperity,Looknottoseethebrightnessofitsday。
  ’Twillbeo’ercastthroughout!
  Gay。Mylord,I’mstruck!
  Clif。Yougavethefirstblow,andthehardestone!
  Look,sir;ifswordsyouneedsmustmeasure,I’mYourmate,nothe!
  Wal。I’mmateforanyman!
  Clif。Drawoffyourfriend,mylord,foryourownsake!
  Wilf。Come,Gaylove!let’shaveanotherroom。
  Gay。Withallmyheart,since’tisyourlordship’swill。
  Wilf。That’sright!Putup!Come,friends!
  [WILFORDandFriendsgoout。]
  Wal。I’llfollowhim!
  Whydoyouholdme?’Tisnotcourteousofyou!
  Think’stthouIfearthem?Fear!IratethembutAsdust!dross!offals!Letmeatthem!——Nay,Callyouthiskind?thenkindnessknowInot;
  NordoIthankyoufor’t!Letgo,Isay!
  Clif。Nay,MasterWalter,they’renotworthyourwrath。
  Wal。HowknowyoumeforMasterWalter?ByMyhunchback,eh!——mystiltsoflegsandarms,Thefashionmoreofape’sthanman’s?Aha!
  Soyouhaveheardthem,too——theirsavagegibesAsIpasson,——"Theregoesmylord!"aha!
  Godmademe,sir,aswellasthemandyou。
  ’Sdeath!Idemandofyou,unhandme,sir!
  Clif。There,sir,you’refreetofollowthem!Goforth,AndI’llgotoo:soonyourwilfulnessShallfallwhate’erofevilmayensue。
  Is’tfityouwasteyourcholeronaburr?
  Thenothingsofthetown;whosesportitisTobreaktheirvillainjestsonworthymen,Thegraverstillthefitter!Fieforshame!
  Regardwhatsuchwouldsay?SowouldnotI,Nomorethanheedacur。
  Wal。You’reright,sir;right,Fortwentycrowns!Sothere’smyrapierup!
  You’vedonemeagoodturnagainstmywill;
  Which,likeawaywardchild,whosepetisoff,Thatmadehimrestiveunderwholesomecheck,Inowrighthumblyown,andthankyoufor。
  Clif。Nothanks,goodMasterWalter,oweyoume!
  I’mgladtoknowyou,sir。
  Wal。Iprayyou,now,Howdidyoulearnmyname?GuessedInotright?
  Was’tnotmycomelyhunchthattaughtityou?
  Clif。Iownit。
  Wal。Right,Iknowit;youtelltruth。Ilikeyoufor’t。
  Clif。ButwhenIhearditsaidThatMasterWalterwasaworthyman,Whosewordwouldpasson’changesoonashisbond;
  Aliberalman——forschemesofpublicgoodThatsetsdowntens,whereothersunitswrite;
  Acharitableman——thegoodhedoes,That’stoldof,notthehalf;InevermoreCouldseethehunchonMasterWalter’sback!
  Wal。Youwouldnotflatterapoorcitizen?
  Clif。Indeed,Iflatternot!
  Wal。Ilikeyourface-
  Afrankandhonestone!Yourframe’swellknit,Proportioned,shaped!
  Clif。Goodsir!
  Wal。YournameisClifford-
  SirThomasClifford。Humph!You’renottheheirDirecttothefairbaronetcy?HeThatwas,wasdrownedabroad。AmInotright?
  Yourcousin,was’tnot?——sosucceededyouTorankandwealth,yourbirthne’erpromisedyou。
  Clif。Iseeyouknowmyhistory。
  Wal。Ido。
  You’reluckywhoconjointhebenefitsOfpenuryandabundance;forIknowYourfatherwasamanofslendermeans。
  Youdonotblush,Isee。That’sright!Whyshouldyou?
  Whatmerittobedroppedonfortune’shill?
  Thehonouristomountit。You’dhavedoneit;
  Foryouweretrainedtoknowledge,industry,Frugality,andhonesty,——thesinewsThatsuresthelptheclimbertothetop,Andkeephimthere。Ihaveaclerk,SirThomas,Onceservedyourfather;there’stheriddleforyou。
  Humph!Imaythankyouformylifeto-day。
  Clif。Iprayyousaynotso。
  Wal。ButIwillsayso!
  BecauseIthinkso,knowso,feelso,sir!
  Yourfortune,Ihaveheard,Ithink,isample!
  Anddoubtlessyouliveupto’t?
  Clif。’Twasmyrule,Andissostill,tokeepmyoutlay,sir,Aspanwithinmymeans。
  Wal。Aprudentrule!
  Theturfisaseductivepastime!
  Clif。Yes。
  Wal。Youkeeparacingstud?Youbet?
  Clif。No,neither。
  ’Twasstillmyfather’sprecept——"BetteroweAyardoflandtolabour,thantochanceBedebtorforarood!"
  Wal。’Twasawiseprecept。
  You’veafairhouse——you’llgetamistressforit?
  Clif。Intime!
  Wal。Intime!’Tistimethychoiceweremade。
  Is’tnotsoyet?OristhyladyloveTheneweststillthouseest?
  Clif。Nay,notso。
  I’dmarry,MasterWalter,butolduse-
  ForsincetheageofthirteenIhavelivedIntheworld——hasmademejealousofthethingThatflatteredmewithhopeofprofit。BargainsAnotherwouldsnapup,mightbeforme:
  TillIhadturnedandturnedthem!Speculations,Thatpromised,twenty,thirty,forty,fifty,Ay,cent-per-cent。returns,Iwouldnotlaunchin,Whenotherswereafloat,andoutatsea;
  WherebyImadesmallgains,butmissedgreatlosses。
  Asever,then,IlookedbeforeIleaped,SodoInow。
  Wal。Thou’rtallthebetterforit!
  Let’ssee!Handfree——heartwhole——well-favoured——so!
  Rich,titled!Letthatpass!——kind,valiant,prudent-
  SirThomas,Icanhelptheetoawife,Hastthouthelucktowinher!
  Clif。MasterWalter!
  Youjest!
  Wal。Idonotjest。Ilikeyou!mark-
  Ilikeyou,andIlikenoteveryone!
  Isayawife,sir,canIhelpyouto,ThepearlytextureofwhosedaintyskinAlonewereworththybaronetcy!FormAndfeaturehasshe,whereinmoveandglowThecharms,thatinthemarble,coldandstill,Culledbythesculptor’sjealousskillandjoinedthere,Inspireus!Sir,amaid,beforewhosefeet,Aduke——adukemightlayhiscoronet,Tolifthertohisstate,andpartnerher!
  Afreshhearttoo!——ayoungfreshheart,sir;oneThatCupidhasnottoyedwith,andawarmone-
  Fresh,young,andwarm!markthat!amindtoboot;
  Wit,sir;sense,taste;——agardenstrictlytended-
  Wherenoughtbutwhatiscostlyflourishes!
  Aconsortforaking,sir!Thoushaltseeher!
  Clif。Ithankyou,MasterWalter!Asyouspeak,MethinksIseemeatthealtar-foot!
  Herhandfastlockedinmine!——theringputon!
  Mywedding-bellringsmerryinmyear;
  AndroundmethronggladtonguesthatgivemejoyTobethebridegroomofsofairabride!
  Wal。What!sparkssothick?We’llhaveablazeanon!
  Servant。[Entering。]Thechariot’satthedoor。
  Wal。Itwaitsintime!
  SirThomas,itshallbeartheetothebowerWheredwellsthisfair——forshe’snocitybelle,Bute’enasylvangoddess!
  Clif。Havewithyou!
  Wal。You’llblessthedayyouservedtheHunchback,sir!
  [Theygoout。]
  SCENEII。——AGardenbeforeaCountryHouse。
  [EnterJULIAandHELEN。]
  Helen。Ilikenot,Julia,thisyourcountrylife。
  I’mwearyon’t!
  Julia。Indeed?SoamnotI!
  Iknownoother;wouldnootherknow!
  Helen。Youwouldnootherknow!WouldyounotknowAnotherrelative?——anotherfriend-
  Anotherhouse——anotheranything,Becausetheonesyouhavealreadypleaseyou?
  That’spoorcontent!Wouldyounotbemorerich,Morewise,morefair?ThesongthatlastyoulearnedYoufancywell;andthereforeshallyoulearnNoothersong?Yourvirginal,’tistrue,Hathasweettone;butdoesitfollowthence,Youshallnothaveanothervirginal?
  Youmay,love,andasweeterone;andsoAsweeterlifemayfindthanthisyoulead!
  Julia。Iseekitnot。Helen,I’mconstancy!
  Helen。Soisacat,adog,asillyhen,Anowl,abat,——wheretheyarewonttolodgeThatstillsojourn,norcaretoshifttheirquarters。
  Thou’rtconstancy?IamgladIknowthyname!
  Thespidercomesofthesamefamily,Thatinhismeshyfortressspendshislife,Unlessyoupullitdownandscarehimfromit。
  Andsothou’rtconstancy?Ar’tproudofthat?
  I’llwarranttheeI’llmatchtheewithasnailFromyeartoyearthatneverleaveshishouse!
  Suchconstancyforsooth!——aconstantgrubThathouseseverintheself-samenutWherehewasborn,tillhungerdriveshimout,Orplunderbreakeththroughhiscastlewall!
  Andso,inverydeed,thou’rtconstancy!
  Julia。Helen,youknowtheadageofthetree;-
  I’veta’enthebend。Thisrurallifeofmine,Enjoinedmebyanunknownfather’swill,I’veledfrominfancy。DebarredfromhopeOfchange,Ine’erhavesighedforchange。ThetownTomewaslikethemoon,foranythoughtIe’ershouldvisitit——norwasIschooledTothinkithalfsofair!
  Helen。Nothalfsofair!
  Thetown’sthesun,andthouhastdweltinnightE’ersincethybirth,nottohaveseenthetown!
  Theirwomentherearequeens,andkingstheirmen;
  Theirhousespalaces!
  Julia。Andwhatofthat?
  Haveyourtown-palacesahalllikethis?
  Couchessofragrant?wallssohigh-adorned?
  Casementswithsuchfestoons,suchprospects,Helen,Asthesefairvistashave?Yourkingsandqueens!
  SeemeaMay-dayqueen,andtalkofthem!
  Helen。Extremesareeverneighbours。’TisastepFromonetotheother!WerethyconstancyAreasonablething——alittlelessOfconstancy——awoman’sconstancy-
  IshouldnotwonderwertthoutenyearshenceThemaidIknowtheenow;but,asitis,Theoddsaretentoone,thatthisdayyearWillseeourMay-dayqueenacityone!
  Julia。Never!I’mweddedtoacountrylife:
  O,didyouhearwhatMasterWaltersays!
  Ninetimesintenthetown’sahollowthing,Wherewhatthingsareisnoughttowhattheyshow;
  Wheremerit’snamelaughsmerit’sselftoscorn!
  WherefriendshipandesteemthatoughttobeThetenantsofmen’shearts,lodgeintheirlooksAndtonguesalone。Wherelittlevirtue,withAcostlykeeper,passesforaheap;
  Aheapfornonethathasahomelyone!
  Wherefashionmakesthelaw——yourumpirewhichYoubowto,whetherithasbrainsornot!
  WhereFollytakethoffhiscapandbells,ToclaponWisdom,whichmustbearthejest!
  Wheretopasscurrentyoumustseemthething,Thepassivething,thatothersthink;andnotYoursimple,honest,independentself!
  Helen。Ay:sosaysMasterWalter。SeeInotWhatcanyoufindinMasterWalter,Julia,Tobesofondofhim!
  Julia。He’sfondofme!
  I’veknownhimsinceIwasachild。E’enthen,TheweekIthoughtaweary,heavyone,ThatbroughtnotMasterWalter。IhadthoseAboutmethenthatmadeafoolofme,Aschildrenoftarefooled;butmoreIlovedGoodMasterWalter’slessonthantheplayWithwhichthey’dsurfeitme。AsIgrewup,MorefrequentMasterWaltercame,andmoreIlovedtoseehim!Ihadtutorsthen,Menofgreatskillandlearning——butnotoneThattaughtlikeMasterWalter。Whatthey’dshowme,AndI,dullasIwas,butdoubtfulsaw,-
  AwordfromMasterWaltermadeasclearAsdaylight!Whenmyschoolingdayswereo’er-
  That’snowgoodthreeyearspast——threeyears——IvowI’mtwenty,Helen!——well,asIwassaying,WhenIhaddonewithschool,andallweregone,StillMasterWaltercame!andstillhecomes,Summerorwinter——frostorrain!I’veseenThesnowuponalevelwiththehedge,YettherewasMasterWalter!
  Helen。Whocomeshere?
  Acarriage,andagayone——whoalights?
  Pshaw!OnlyMasterWalter!Whatseeyou,Whichthusrepairsthearchofthefairbrow,Afrownwasliketospoil?——Agentleman!
  Oneofourtownkings!Mark!——Howsayyounow?
  Wouldstbeatownqueen,Julia?Whichofus,Iwonder,comeshefor?
  Julia。Forneitherofus;
  He’sMasterWalter’sclerk,mostlike。
  Helen。Mostlike!
  Markhimashecomesuptheavenue;
  Solooksaclerk!Aclerkhassuchagait!
  Sodoesaclerkdress,Julia!——mindhishose-
  They’reverylikeaclerk’s!adiamondloopAndbutton,noteyou,forhisclerkship’shat,-
  O,certainlyaclerk!Avelvetcloak,Jerkinofsilk,anddoubletofthesame,-
  Foralltheworldaclerk!See,Julia,see,HowMasterWalterbows,andyieldshimplace,Thathemayfirstgoin——averyclerk!
  I’lllearnofthee,love,whenI’dknowaclerk!
  Julia。Iwonderwhoheis!
  Helen。Wouldstliketoknow?
  Wouldstforafancyridetotownwithhim?
  Iprophesyhecomestotaketheethither!
  Julia。Hene’ertakesmetotown!No,Helen,no!
  Totownwhowill,acountrylifeforme!
  Helen。We’llsee!
  [EnterFATHOM。]
  Fath。You’rewanted,madam。
  Julia。[Embarrassed。]Whichofus?
  Fath。You,madam。
  Helen。Julia!what’sthematter?Nay,Mountnottherosesosoon!HemustnotseeitAmonthhence。’Tislovesflower,whichonceshewears,Themaidisallhisown。
  Julia。Goto!
  Helen。BesureHecomestowoothee!Hewillbeartheehence;
  He’llmaketheechangethecountryforthetown。
  Julia。I’mconstancy。Namehethetowntome,I’lltellwhatIthinkon’t!
  Helen。ThenyouguessHecomesawooing?
  Julia。Iguessnought。
  Helen。Youdo!
  Atyourgravewords,yourlips,morehonest,smile,Andshowthemtobetraitors。Hietohim。
  Julia。Hietheetosoberness。
  [Goesout。]
  Helen。Ay,willI,when,Thybridemaid,Ishallhietochurchwiththee。
  Well,Fathom,whoiscome?
  Fath。Iknownot。
  Helen。What!Didstthounothearhisname?
  Fath。Idid。
  Helen。Whatis’t?
  Fath。Inotednot。
  Helen。Whathastthouearsfor,then?
  Fath。Whatgoodwereitformetomindhisname?
  IdobutwhatImustdo。TodothatIslabourquiteenough!
  Wal。[Without。]What,Fathom!
  Fath。Here。
  Wal。[Entering。]Here,sirrah!Whereforedidstnotcometome?
  Fath。Youdidnotbidmecome。
  Wal。Icalledthee。
  Fath。Yes。
  AndIsaid"Here;"andwaitedthentoknowYourworship’swillwithme。
  Wal。Wegototown。
  Thymistress,thou,andallthehouse。
  Fath。Well,sir?
  Wal。Mak’stthounotreadythentogototown?
  Hence,knave,despatch!
  [FATHOMgoesout。]
  Helen。Gowetotown?
  Wal。Wedo;
  ’Tisnowherfather’swillsheseesthetown。
  Helen。I’mgladon’t。Goesshetoherfather?
  Wal。No:
  Atthedesireofthinesheforatermsharesroofwiththee。
  Helen。I’mverygladon’t。
  Wal。What!
  Youlikeher,then?Ithoughtyouwould。’TistimeSheseesthetown。
  Helen。IthasbeentimeforthatThesesixyears。
  Wal。Bythywisdom’scount。NodoubtYou’vetoldherwhatapreciousplaceitis。
  Helen。Ihave。
  Wal。Ievenguessedasmuch。ForthatItoldtheeofher;broughttheeheretoseeher;
  Andprayedtheetosojournaspacewithher;
  Thatitsfairspace,fromthytoofairreport,Mightstrikeanoviceless——solessdeceiveher。
  Ididnotputtheeundercheck。
  Helen。’Twasright,-
  ElsehadIbrokenloose,andrunthewilder!
  Soknowsshenotherfatheryet:that’sstrange。
  Ipritheehowdoesmine?
  Wal。Well——verywell。
  Newsforthee。
  Helen。What?
  Wal。Thycousinisintown。
  Helen。MycousinModus?
  Wal。MuchdoIsuspectThatcousin’snearertothyheartthanblood。
  Helen。Pshaw!Wedmetoamustylibrary!
  LovehimwhonothinglovesbutGreekandLatin!
  But,MasterWalter,youforgetthemainSurpassingpointofall!Who’scomewithyou?
  Wal。Ay,that’sthequestion!
  Helen。IshesoldierorCivilian?lordorgentleman?He’srich,Ifthat’shischariot!Whereishisestate?
  Whatbringsitin?Sixthousandpoundsayear?
  Twelvethousand,maybe!Ishebachelor,Orhusband?BachelorI’msureheisComeshenothitherwooing,MasterWalter?
  Nay,prithee,answerme!
  Wal。WhosaysthysexArecurious?Thatthey’repatient,I’llbesworn;
  Andreasonable——veryreasonable-
  Tolookfortwentyanswersinabreath!
  Come,thoushaltbeenlightened——butpropoundThyquestionsonebyone!Thou’rtfartooaptAscholar!MyabilitytoteachWillne’erkeeppace,Ifear,withthinetolearn。
  [Theygoout。]
  SCENEIII。——AnApartmentintheHouse。
  [EnterJULIA,followedbyCLIFFORD。]
  Julia。Nomore!Iprayyou,sir,nomore!
  Clif。Iloveyou!
  Julia。Youmockme,sir!
  Clif。ThenistherenosuchthingOnearthasreverence;honourfilial,thefearOfkings,theaweofsupremeheavenitself,Areonlyshowsandsoundsthatstandfornothing。
  Iloveyou!
  Julia。Youhaveknownmescarceaminute!
  Clif。Saybutamoment,stillIsayIloveyou!
  Love’snotaflowerthatgrowsonthedullearth;
  Springsbythecalendar;mustwaitforthesun-
  Forrain;——maturesbyparts;——musttakeitstimeTostem,toleaf,tobud,toblow。ItownsArichersoil,andboastsaquickerseed!
  Youlookforit,andseeitnot;andlo!
  E’enwhileyoulook,thepeerlessflowerisup。
  Consummateinthebirth!
  Julia。Is’tfearIfeel?
  Whyelseshouldbeatmyheart?Itcan’tbefear!
  SomethingIneedsmustsay。You’refromthetown;
  Howcomesit,sir,youseekacountrywife?
  Methinks’twilltaxhiswittoanswerthat。
  Clif。Injoiningcontrastsliethlove’sdelight。
  Complexion,stature,nature,matethit,Notwiththeirkinds,butwiththeiropposites。
  Hencehandsofsnowinpalmsofrussetlie;
  TheformofHerculesaffectsthesylph’s;
  Andbreasts,thatcasethelion’sfear-proofheart,Findtheirmeetlodgeinarmswheretremorsdwell!
  Haplyforthis,onAfric’sswarthyneck,HathEurope’spricelesspearlbeenseentohang,Thatmakestheorientpoor!Sowithdegrees,Rankpassesbythecirclet-gracedbrow,Upontheforehead,bare,ofnotelessnessToprintthenuptialkiss。AswithdegreesSois’twithhabits;thereforeI,indeedAgallantofthetown,thetownforsake,Towinacountrywife。
  Julia。HispromptreplyMybackwardchallengeshames!MustIgiveo’er?
  I’lltryhiswitagain。WhomarriesmeMustleadacountrylife。
  Clif。ThelifeI’dlead!
  Butfoolswouldflyfromit;forO!’tissweet!
  Itfindstheheartout,bethereonetofind;
  Andcornersin’twherestoreofpleasureslodge,Weneverdreamedwerethere!Itistodwell’Midsmilesthatarenotneighbourstodeceit;
  Music,whosemelodyisoftheheart;
  Andgifts,thatarenotmadeforinterest,-
  AbundantlybestowedbyNature’scheek,Andvoice,andhand!Itistoliveonlife,Andhusbandit!ItistoconstantscanThehandiworkofHeaven。ItistoconItsmercy,bounty,wisdom,power!ItisTonearerseeourGod!
  Julia。HowlikehetalksToMasterWalter!ShallIgiveito’er?
  Notyet。Thouwouldstnotliveonehalfayear!
  AquartermightstthouforthenoveltyOffieldsandtrees;butthenitneedsmustbeInsummertime,whentheygodressed。
  Clif。Notit!
  Inanytime——saywinter!FieldsandtreesHavecharmsformeinverywintertime。
  Julia。Butsnowmayclothethemthen。
  Clif。IlikethemfullAswellinsnow!
  Julia。Youdo?
  Clif。Ido。
  Julia。ButnightWillhidebothsnowandthem,andthatsetsinEreafternoonisout。Aheavything,Acountryfiresideinawinter’snight,Toonebredinthetown,——wherewinter’ssaid,Forsunofgaietyandsportiveness,Tobeggarshiningsummer。
  Clif。IshouldlikeAcountrywinter’snightespecially!
  Julia。You’dsleepbythefire。
  Clif。NotI;I’dtalktothee。
  Julia。You’dtireofthat!
  Clif。I’dreadtothee。
  Julia。Andthat!
  Clif。I’dtalktotheeagain。
  Julia。AndsoonertireThanfirstyoudid,andfallasleepatlast。
  You’dneverdotoleadacountrylife。
  Clif。Youdealtooharshlywithme!Matchlessmaid,Aslovedinstructorbrightensdullestwit,Fearnottoundertakethechargeofme!
  Awillingpupilkneelstothee,andlaysHistitleandhisfortuneatyourfeet。
  Julia。Histitleandhisfortune!
  [EnterMASTERWALTERandHELEN。——JULIA,disconcerted,retireswiththelatter。——CLIFFORDrises。]
  Wal。So,SirThomas!
  Aha!youhusbandtime!Well,wasIright?
  Is’tnotthejewelthatItoldyou’twas?
  Wouldstthounotgivethineeyestowearit?Eh?
  Ithasanowner,though,——nay,startnot,——oneThatmaybeboughttopartwith’t,andwithwhomI’llstandthyfriend——Iwill——Isay,Iwill!
  Astrangeman,sir,andunaccountable:
  ButIcanhumourhim——willhumourhimForthysake,goodSirThomas;forIlikethee。
  Well,is’tabargain?Come,thyhanduponit。
  Awordortwowiththee。
  [Theyretire。JULIAandHELENcomeforward。]
  Julia。Gouptotown!
  Helen。HaveInotsaidittentimeso’ertothee?
  Butifthoulikestitnot,protestagainstit。
  Julia。Notif’tisMasterWalter’swill。
  Helen。Whatthen?
  ThouwouldstnotbreakthyheartforMasterWalter?
  Julia。Thatfollowsnot!
  Helen。Whatfollowsnot?
  Julia。ThatI
  Shouldbreakmyheart,becausewegototown。
  Helen。Indeed?——Oh,that’sanothermatter。Well,I’de’enadvisetheethentodohiswill;
  And,everafter,whenIprophesy,Believeme,Julia!
  [Theyretire。MASTERWALTERcomesforward。]
  [EnterFATHOM。]
  Fath。Sopleaseyou,sir,aletter,——apost-hasteletter!Thebeareronhorseback,thehorseinafoam——smokinglikeaboilerattheheat——besureaposthasteletter!
  Wal。Looktothehorseandrider。
  [Openstheletterandreads。]
  What’sthis?Atestamentaddressedtome,Foundinhislordship’sescritoire,andthenceDirectedtobetakenbynohandButmine。Mypresenceinstantlyrequired。
  [SIRTHOMAS,JULIA,andHELENcomeforward。]
  Come,mymistresses,Youdineintownto-day。Yourfather’swill,Itis,myJulia,thatyouseetheworld;
  Andthoushaltseeitinitsbestattire。
  Itsgayestlooks——itsrichestfineryItshallputonforthee,thatthoumay’stjudgeBetwixtit,andthisrurallifeyou’velived。
  BusinessofmomentI’mbutthusadvisedof,Touchingthewillofmylatenoblemaster,TheEarlofRochdale,recentlydeceased,Commandsmeforatimetoleavetheethere。
  SirThomas,handhertothechariot。Nay,Itelltheetrue。Wegoindeedtotown!
  [Theygoout。]
  ACTII。
  SCENEI。——AnApartmentinMasterHeartwell’sHouse。
  [EnterFATHOMandTHOMAS。]
  Thos。Well,Fathom,isthymistressup?
  Fath。Sheis,MasterThomas,andbreakfasted。
  Thos。Shestandsitwell!’Twasfive,yousay,whenshecamehome;
  andwantsitnowthree-quartersofanhouroften?Waittillherstockofcountryhealthisout。
  Fath。’Twillcometothat,MasterThomas,beforeshelivesanothermonthintown!three,four,fivesixo’clockarenowthehoursshekeeps。’Twasotherwisewithherinthecountry。There,mymistressusedtorisewhattimeshenowliesdown。
  Thos。Why,yes;she’schangedsinceshecamehither。
  Fath。Changed,doyousay,MasterThomas?Changed,forsooth!I
  knownotthethinginwhichsheisnotchanged,savingthatsheisstillawoman。Itelltheethereisnokeepingpacewithhermoods。
  Inthecountryshehadnoneofthem。WhenIbroughtwhatsheaskedfor,itwas"Thankyou,Fathom,"andnomoretodo;butnow,nothingcontentsher。Harkye!wereyouagentleman,MasterThomas,——forthenyouknowyouwouldbeadifferentkindofman,——howmanytimeswouldyouhaveyourcoataltered?
  Thos。Why,MasterFathom,asmanytimesasitwouldtaketomakeitfitme。
  Fath。Good!But,supposingitfittedtheeatthefirst?
  Thos。ThenwouldIhaveitalterednotatall。
  Fath。Good!Thouwouldstbeareasonablegentleman。Thouwouldsthaveaconscience。Nowharktoataleaboutmylady’slastgown。
  Howmanytimes,thinkyou,tookIitbacktothesempstress?
  Thos。Thrice,maybe。
  Fath。Thrice,maybe!Twentytimes,maybe;andnotaturntoomany,forthetruthon’t。Twentytimes,ontheoathofthesempstress。Nowmarkme——canyoucount?
  Thos。Afterafashion。
  Fath。Youhavemuchtobethankfulfor,MasterThomas。YouLondonserving-menhaveaworldofthings,whichweinthecountryneverdreamof。Nowmark:-FourtimestookIitbackfortheflounce;
  twiceforthesleeves;threeforthetucker——Howmanytimesinallisthat?
  Thos。Eighttimestoafraction,MasterFathom。
  Fath。Whatamasteroffiguresyouare!Eighttimes——nowrecollectthat!Andthenfoundshefaultwiththetrimmings。Nowtellme,howmanytimestookIbackthegownforthetrimmings?
  Thos。Eighttimesmore,perhaps!
  Fath。Tentimestoacertainty。Howmanytimesmakesthat?
  Thos。Eighteen,MasterFathom,bytheruleofaddition。
  Fath。Andhowmanytimesmorewillmaketwenty?
  Thee。Twice,bythesamerule。
  Fath。Thouhastworkedwiththypencilandslate,MasterThomas!
  Well,tentimes,asIsaid,tookIbackthegownforthetrimmings;
  andwasshecontentafterall?Iwarrantyouno,ormyearsdidnotpayforit。Shewished,shesaid,thattheslatternsempstresshadnottouchedthegown,fornoughthadshedonebutbotchedit。Nowwhatthinkyouhadthesempstressdonetothegown?
  Thos。Tosurmisethat,Imustbelearnedinthesempstress’sart。
  Fath。Thesempstress’sart!Thouhasthitit!Oh,thesweetsempstress!theexcellentsempstress!Mistressofherscissorsandneedles,whicharepointlessandedgelesstoherart!Thesempstresshaddonenothingtothegown;yetravesandstormsmymistressatherforhavingbotcheditinthemakingandmending;andordersherstraighttomakeanotherone,whichhomethesempstressbringsonTuesdaylast。
  Thos。Andfoundthyfairmistressasmanyfaultswiththat?
  Fath。Notone!Shefindsitaverypatternofagown!Awell-
  sittingflounce!Thesleevesafit——thetuckerafit——thetrimmingsherfancytoaT——ha!ha!ha!andshepraisedthesempstress——ha!
  ha!ha!andshesmilesatme,andIsmile——ha!ha!ha!andthesempstresssmiles——ha!ha!ha!Now,whydidthesempstresssmile?
  Thos。Thatshehadsucceededsowellinherart。
  Fath。Thouhasthititagain!Thejademusthavebeenbornasempstress!IfeverImarry,sheshallworkformywife。Thegownwasthesamegown,andtherewasmymistress’stwentiethmood!
  Thos。WhatthinkyouwillMasterWaltersaywhenhecomesback?I
  fearhe’llhardlyknowhiscountrymaidagain。Hassheyetfixedherwedding-day?
  Fath。Shehas,MasterThomas。Icoaxeditfromhermaid。Shemarries,Mondayweek。
  Thos。ComesnotMasterWalterbackto-day?
  Fath。Yourmasterexpectshim。[Aringing。]Perhapsthat’she。I
  pritheegoandopenthedoor;do,MasterThomas,do;forprovesitmymaster,he’llsurelyquestionme。
  Thos。AndwhatshouldIdo?
  Fath。Answerhim,MasterThomas,andmakehimnonethewiser。
  He’llgomad,whenhelearnshowmyladyflauntsit!Go!openthedoor,Iprithee。Fiftythings,MasterThomas,knowyou,foronethingthatIknow!Youcanturnandtwistamatterintoanyotherkindofmatter;andthentwistandturnitbackagain,ifneedsbe;
  somuchyouservantsofthetownbeatusofthecountry,MasterThomas。Openthedoor,now;do,MasterThomas,do!
  [Theygoout。]
  SCENEII。——AGardenwithtwoArbours。
  [EnterMASTERHEARTWELLandMASTERWALTERmeeting。]
  Heart。GoodMasterWalter,welcomebackagain!
  Wal。I’mgladtoseeyou,MasterHeartwell!
  Heart。How,Iprayyou,spedthemightybusinesswhichSosuddencalledyouhence?
  Wal。Weighty,indeed!
  Whatthouwouldstne’erexpect——wiltscarcebelieve!
  Long-hiddenwrong,wondrouslycometolight,Andgreatrightdone!Butmoreofthisanon。
  Nowofmywarddiscourse!Likesshethetown?
  Howdoesshe?Isshewell?CanstmatchmeherAmongyourcitymaids?
  Heart。Norcourtonesneither!
  Shefaroutstripsthemall!
  Wal。Iknewshewould。
  Whatelsecouldfollowinamaidsobred?
  Apuremind,MasterHeartwell!——notataintFromintercoursewiththedistemperedtown;
  Withwhichallcontactwaswalledout,until,Maturedinsoundness,Icouldtrusthertoit,Andsleepamidstinfection!
  Heart。MasterWalter!
  Wal。Well?
  Heart。Tellme,prithee,whichislikelierToploughaseainsafety?——hethat’swontTosailinit,——orhethatbythechartIsmasterofitssoundings,bearings,——knowsIsheadlands,havens,currents——where’tisbold,Andwherebehovestokeepagoodlook-out。
  Theonewillswim,wheresinkstheotherone?
  Wal。Thedriftofthis?
  Heart。Doyounotguessit?
  Wal。Humph!
  Heart。Ifyouwouldtrainamaidtoliveintown,Breedhernotinthecountry!
  Wal。Sayyouso?
  Andstandsshenotthetest?
  Heart。Assnowstandsfire!
  Yourcountrymaidhasmeltedallaway,Andplaysthecityladytotheheight;
  Hermorningsgivestomercers,milliners,Shoemakers,jewellers,andhaberdashers;
  Hernoons,tocalls;herafternoons,todressing;
  Evenings,toplaysanddrums;andnights,torouts,Balls,masquerades!Sleeponlyendstheriot,Whichwakingstillbegins!
  Wal。I’mallamaze!
  HowbearsSirThomasthis?
  Heart。Why,patiently;
  Thoughonecanseewithpain。
  Wal。Sheloveshim?Ha!
  Thatshrugisdoubt!She’dne’erconsenttowedhimUnlessshelovedhim!——never!HeryoungfancyThepleasuresofthetown——newthings——havecaught,Anontheirholdwillslacken;she’llbecomeHerformerselfagain;toitsoldtrainOfsoberfeelingswillherheartreturn;
  Andthenshe’llgiveitwhollytothemanHervirginwisheschose!
  Heart。HerecomesSirThomas;
  AndwithhimMasterModus。
  Wal。Letthempass:
  IwouldnotseehimtillIspeakwithher。
  [TheyretireintooneoftheArbours。]
  [EnterCLIFFORDandMODUS。]
  Clif。Adreadfulquestionisit,whenwelove,Toaskiflove’sreturned!IdidbelieveFairJulia’sheartwasmine——Idoubtitnow!
  Butoncelastnightshedancedwithme,herhand,Tothisgallantandthatengaged,assoonAsaskedfor?Maidthatlovedwouldscarcedothis?
  Norvisitwetogetherasweused,Whenfirstshecametotown。ShelovesmelessThanonceshedid——orlovesmenotatall。
  Mod。I’mlittleskilled,SirThomas,intheworld:
  Whatmeanyounowtodo?
  Clif。Remonstratewithher;
  Cometoanunderstanding,and,atonce,Ifsherepentsherpromisetobemine,Absolveherfromit——andsayfarewelltoher。
  Mod。Lo,then,youropportunity——shecomes-
  Mycousinalso:——herwillIengage,Whilstyouconversetogether。
  Clif。Nay,notyet!
  Myheartturnscowardatthesightofher。
  Staytillitfindsnewcourage!Letthempass。
  [CLIFFORDandMODUSretireintotheotherArbour。]
  [EnterJULIAandHELEN。]
  Helen。So,MondayweekwillsaygoodmorntotheeAmaid,andbidgoodnightasoberwife!
  Julia。ThatMondayweek,Itrust,willnevercome,Thatbragstomakeasoberwifeofme!
  Helen。Howchangedyouare,myJulia!
  Julia。Changemakeschange。
  Helen。Whywedd’stthou,then?
  Julia。BecauseIpromisedhim!
  Helen。Thoulovesthim?
  Julia。DoI?
  Helen。He’samantolove!
  Arightwell-favouredman!
  Julia。Yourpoint’swellfavoured。
  Wheredidyoupurchaseit?InGracechurchStreet?
  Helen。Pshaw!nevermindmypoint,buttalkofhim。
  Julia。I’drathertalkwiththeeaboutthelace。
  Whereboughtyouit?InGracechurchStreet,Cheapside,Whitechapel,LittleBritain?Can’tyousayWhere’twasyouboughtthelace?
  Helen。InCheapside,then。
  Andnow,then,toSirThomas!HeisjustTheheightIlikeaman。
  Julia。Thyfeather’sjustTheheightIlikeafeather!Mine’stooshort!
  WhatshallIgivetheeinexchangeforit?
  Helen。WhatshallIgivetheeforaminute’stalkAboutSirThomas?
  Julia。Why,thyfeather。
  Helen。Takeit!
  Clif。[AsidetoModus。]What,likesshenottospeakofme?
  Helen。AndnowLet’stalkaboutSirThomas——muchI’msureHelovesyou。
  Julia。MuchI’msure,hehasaright!
  ThoseknowIwhowouldgivetheireyestobeSirThomas,formysake!
  Helen。Suchtoo,knowI。
  But’mongthemnonethatcancomparewithhim,Notonesograceful。
  Julia。WhatagracefulsetYourfeatherhas!
  Helen。Nay,giveitbacktome,Unlessyoupaymefor’t。
  Julia。Whatwas’ttoget?
  Helen。Aminute’stalkwiththeeaboutSirThomas。
  Julia。Talkofhistitle,andhisfortunethen。
  Clif。[Aside。]Indeed!Iwouldnotlisten,yetImust!
  Julia。Anamplefortune,Helen——IshallbeAhappywife!Whatrouts,whatballs,whatmasques,Whatgala-days!
  Clif。[Aside。]Fortheseshemarriesme!
  She’lltalkofthese!
  Julia。Thinknot,whenIamwed,I’llkeepthehouseasowletdoeshertower,Alone,——wheneveryotherbird’sonwing。
  I’llusemypalfrey,Helen;andmycoach;
  Mybarge,too,forexcursionontheThames:
  WhatdrivestoBarnet,Hackney,Islington!
  WhatridestoEpping,Hounslow,andBlackheath!
  WhatsailstoGreenwich,Woolwich,Fulham,Kew!
  I’llsetapatterntoyourladywives!
  Clif。[Aside。]Ay,lady?Trustme,notatmyexpense。