Contents
THETWENTY-FIRSTOFOCTOBER
DIESIRAE
MUTABILESEMPER
THEMAGICRING
ITSWALLSWEREASOFJASPER
ASAGAOFTHESEAS
THERELUCTANTDRAGON
ADEPARTURE
DreamDaysTHETWENTY-FIRSTOF
OCTOBER
Inthematterofgeneralcultureandattainments,weyoungstersstoodonprettylevelground。True,itwasalwayshappeningthatoneofuswouldbesingledoutatanymoment,freakishly,andwithoutregardtohisownpreferences,towrestlewiththeinflectionsofsomeidioticlanguagelongrightlydead;whileanother,fromsomefanciedartistictendencywhichalwaysfailedtojustifyitself,mightbetoldoffwithoutwarningtohammeroutscalesandexercises,andtobedewthesenselesskeyswithtearsofwearinessorofrevolt。Butinsubjectscommontoeithersex,andheldtobenecessaryevenforhimwhoseambitionsoarednohigherthantocrackawhipinacircus-ring——
ingeography,forinstance,arithmetic,orthewearydoingsofkingsandqueens——eachwouldhavescornedtoexcel。And,indeed,whateverourindividualgifts,ageneraldoggeddeterminationtoshirkandtoevadekeptusallatmuchthesamedeadlevel,——alevelofignorancetemperedbyinsubordination。
Fortunatelythereexistedawiderangeofsubjects,ofhealthiertonethanthosealreadyenumerated,inwhichwewerefreetochooseforourselves,andwhichwewouldhavescornedtoconsidereducation;andinthesewefreelyfollowedeachhisownparticularline,oftenattaininganamountofspecialknowledgewhichstruckourignoranteldersassimplyuncanny。ForEdward,theuniforms,accoutrements,colours,andmottoesoftheregimentscomposingtheBritishArmyhadaspecialglamour。
Inthematteroffacingshewassimplyfaultless;amongchevrons,badges,medals,andstars,hemovedfamiliarly;heevenknewthenamesofmostofthecolonelsincommand;andhewouldsquandersunnyhoursproneonthelawn,heedlessofchallengefrombirdorbeast,poringoveratatteredArmyList。Myownaccomplishmentwasofanothercharacter——took,asitseemedtome,awiderandamoreuntrammelledrange。DragoonsmighthaveswaggeredinLincolngreen,riflemenmighthavedonnedsporransovertartantrews,withoutexcitingnoticeorcommentfromme。ButdidyouseekpreciseinformationastothefaunaoftheAmericancontinent,thenyouhadcometotherightshop。Whereandwhythebison"wallowed";howbeaverweretobetrappedandwildturkeysstalked;thegrizzlyandhowtohandlehim,andtheprettypressingwaysoftheconstrictor,——infine,thehauntsandthehabitsofallthatburrowed,strutted,roared,orwriggledbetweentheAtlanticandthePacific,——allthisknowledgeItookformyprovince。Bytheothersmyequipmentwasfullyrecognized。Supposingabookwithabear-huntinitmadeitswayintothehouse,andtheatmospherewaselectricwithexcitement;
still,itwasnecessarythatIshouldfirstdecidewhethertheslothadbeenproperlydescribedandproperlyfollowedup,eretheworkcouldbestampedwithfullapproval。Awritermighthavewonfamethroughoutthecivilizedglobeforhistrappersandhisrealisticbackwoods,andallwentfornothing。IfhispemmicanwerenotproperlycompoundedIdamnedhisachievement,anditwasheardnomoreof。
Haroldwashardlyoldenoughtopossessaspecialsubjectofhisown。Hehadhisinstincts,indeed,andatbird’s-nestingtheyalmostamountedtoprophecy。Whereweothersonlysuspectedeggs,surmisedpossibleeggs,hinteddoubtfullyateggsintheneighbourhood,Haroldwentstraightfortherightbush,bough,orholeasifhecarriedadivining-rod。Butthisfacultybelongedtotheclassofmeregifts,andwasnottoberankedwithEdward’sloreregardingfacings,andmineastothehabitsofprairie-dogs,bothgainedbypainfulstudyandextensivetravelinthose"realmsofgold,"theArmyListandBallantyne。
Selina’ssubject,quiteunaccountably,happenedtobenavalhistory。Thereisnolayingdownrulesastosubjects;youjustpossessthem——orrather,theypossessyou——andtheirgenesisorprotoplasmisrarelytobetrackeddown。Selinahadneversomuchasseenthesea;butforthatmatterneitherhadIeversetfootontheAmericancontinent,theby-waysofwhichIknewsointimately。AndjustasI,ifsetdownwithoutwarninginthemiddleoftheRockyMountains,wouldhavebeenperfectlyathome,soSelina,ifageniehaddroppedhersuddenlyonPortsmouthHard,couldhavegivenpointstomostofitsfrequenters。FromthedaysofBlakedowntothedeathofNelson(shenevercondescendedfurther)SelinahadtakenspiritualpartineverynotableengagementoftheBritishNavy;andeveninthedarkdayswhenshehadtopickupskirtsandflee,chasedbyanungallantDeRuyterorVanTromp,shewasyetcheerfulintheconsciousnessthaterelongshewouldbegleefullyhammeringthefleetsoftheworld,intheglorioustimestofollow。Whenthatgoldenperiodarrived,Selinawasbusyindeed;and,whilelovingbesttostandwherethesplinterswereflyingthethickest。shewasalsoacarefulandcriticalstudentofseamanshipandofmanoeuvre。Sheknewtheorderinwhichthegreatline-of-battleshipsmovedintoaction,thevesselstheyrespectivelyengaged,themomentwheneachletgoitsanchor,andwhichofthemhadaspringonitscable(whilenotunderstandingthephrase,shecarefullynotedthefact);andshehabituallywentintoanengagementonthequarter-deckofthegallantshipthatreserveditsfirethelongest。
AtthetimeofSelina’sweirdseizureIwasunfortunatelyawayfromhome,onaloathsomevisittoanaunt;andmyaccountisthereforefeeblycompoundedfromhearsay。ItwasanabsenceI
neverceasedtoregret——scoringitup,withasenseofinjury,againsttheaunt。Therewasasplendiduselessnessaboutthewholeperformancethatspeciallyappealedtomyartisticsense。
ThatitshouldhavebeenSelina,too,whoshouldbreakoutthisway——Selina,whohadjustbecomearegularsubscribertothe"YoungLadies’Journal,"andwhoallowedherselftobetakenouttostrangeteaswithanairofresignationpalpablyassumed——thiswasaspecialjoy,andservedtoremindmethatmuchofthisdreadedconventionthatwascreepingoverusmightbe,afterall,onlyveneer。Edwardalsowasabsent,gettinglickedintoshapeatschool;buttohimthelosswasnothing。Withhissternpracticalbenthewouldn’thaveseenanysenseinit——torecalloneofhisfavouriteexpressions。ToHarold,however,forwhomthegodshadalwayscherishedaspecialtenderness,itwasgranted,notonlytowitness,butalso,priestlike,tofeedthesacredfireitself。Andifatthetimehepaidthepenaltyexactedbythesordidunimaginativeoneswhotemporarilyruletheroast,hemusteverafter,onefeelssure,havecarriedinsidehimsomeofthewhitegladnessoftheacolytewho,greatlyprivileged,hasbeenpermittedtoswingacenseratthesacringoftheveryMass。
Octoberwasmellowingfast,andwithittheyearitself;fulloftenderhints,inwoodlandandhedgerow,ofacoursewell-nighcompleted。Fromallsidesthatstillafternoonyoucaughtthequickbreathingandsoboftherunnernearingthegoal。
Preoccupiedandpossessed,Selinahadstrayeddownthegardenandoutintothepasturebeyond,where,onabitofrisinggroundthatdominatedthegardenononesideandthedownswiththeoldcoach-roadontheother,shehadcastherselfdowntochewthecudoffancy。ThereshewaspresentlyjoinedbyHarold,breathlessandveryfullofhislatestgrievance。
"Iaskedhimnotto,"heburstout。"Isaidifhe’donlypleasewaitabitandEdwardwouldbebacksoon,anditcouldn’tmattertoHIM,andthepigwouldn’tmind,andEdward’dbepleasedandeverybody’dbehappy。Buthejustsaidhewasverysorry,butbacondidn’twaitfornobody。SoItoldhimhewasaregularbeast,andthenIcameaway。And——andIb’lievethey’redoingitnow!"
"Yes,he’sabeast,"agreedSelina,absently。Shehadforgottenallaboutthepig-killing。Haroldkickedawayafreshlythrown-
upmole-hill,andproddeddowntheholewithastick。FromthedirectionofFarmerLarkin’sdemesnecamealong-drawnnoteofsorrow,athincryandappeal,tellingthatthestoutsoulofablackBerkshirepigwasalreadyfaringdownthestonytracktoHades。
"D’youknowwhatdayitis?"saidSelinapresently,inalowvoice,lookingfarawaybeforeher。
Harolddidnotappeartoknow,noryettocare。Hehadlaidopenhismole-runforayardorso,andwasstillgrubbingatitabsorbedly。
"It’sTrafalgarDay,"wentonSelina,trancedly;"TrafalgarDay——
andnobodycares!"
SomethinginhertonetoldHaroldthathewasnotbehavingquitebecomingly。Hedidn’texactlyknowinwhatmanner;still,heabandonedhismole-huntforamorecourteousattitudeofattention。
"Overthere,"resumedSelina——shewasgazingoutinthedirectionoftheoldhighroad——"overtherethecoachesusedtogoby。
UncleThomaswastellingmeaboutittheotherday。Andthepeopleusedtowatchfor’emcoming,totellthetimeby,andp’r’apstogettheirparcels。Andonemorning——theywouldn’tbeexpectinganythingdifferent——onemorning,firsttherewouldbeacloudofdust,asusual,andthenthecoachwouldcomeracingby,andTHENtheywouldknow!Forthecoachwouldbedressedinlaurel,alllaurelfromstemtostern!Andthecoachmanwouldbewearinglaurel,andtheguardwouldbewearinglaurel;andthentheywouldknow,thentheywouldknow!"
Haroldlistenedinrespectfulsilence。Hewouldmuchratherhavebeenhuntingthemole,whomusthavebeenamileawaybythistimeifhehadhiswitsabouthim。Buthehadallthenaturalinstinctsofagentleman;ofwhomitisoneoftheprincipalmarks,ifnotthecompletedefinition,nevertoshowsignsofbeingbored。
Selinarosetoherfeet,andpacedtheturfrestlesslywithashortquarter-deckwalk。
"Whycan’tweDOsomething?"sheburstoutpresently。
"HE——hedideverything——whycan’twedoanythingforhim?"
"WHOdideverything?"inquiredHarold,meekly。Itwasuselesswastingfurtherlongingsonthatmole。Likethedead,hetravelledfast。
"Why,Nelson,ofcourse,"saidSelina,shortly,stilllookingrestlesslyaroundforhelporsuggestion。
"Buthe’s——he’sDEAD,isn’the?"askedHarold,slightlypuzzled。
"What’sthatgottodowithit?"retortedhissister,resuminghercaged-lionpromenade。
Haroldwassomewhattakenaback。Inthecaseofthepig,forinstance,whoselastoutcryhadnowpassedintostillness,hehadconsideredthechapterasfinallyclosed。WhateverinnocentmirththeholidaysmightholdinstoreforEdward,thatparticularpig,atleast,wouldnotbeacontributor。Andnowhewasgiventounderstandthatthesituationhadnotmateriallychanged!Hewouldhavetorevisehisideas,itseemed。
Sittinguponend,helookedtowardsthegardenforassistanceinthetask。Thence,evenashegazed,atinycolumnofsmokerosestraightupintothestillair。Thegardenerhadbeensweepingthatafternoon,andnow,anunconsciouspriest,wasofferinghissacrificeofautumnleavestothecalm-eyedgoddessofchanginghuesandchillforebodingswhowasmovingslowlyaboutthelandthatgoldenafternoon。Haroldwasupandoffinamoment,forgettingNelson,forgettingthepig,themole,theLarkinbetrayal,andSelina’sstrangefeverofconscience。Herewasfire,realfire,toplaywith,andthatwasevenbetterthanmessingwithwater,orremodellingtheplasticsurfaceoftheearth。Ofallthetoystheworldprovidesforright-mindedpersons,theoriginalelementsrankeasilythefirst。
ButSelinasatonwhereshewas,herchinonherfists;andherfancieswhirledanddrifted,hereandthere,incurlsandeddies,alongwiththesmokeshewaswatching。Asthequick-
footedduskoftheshortOctoberdaysteppedlightlyoverthegarden,littleredtonguesoffiremightbeseentoleapandvanishinthesmoke。Harold,anonstaggeringunderarmfulsofleaves,anonstokingvigorously,wasdiscernibleonlyatfitfulintervals。ItwasanothersortofsmokethattheinnereyeofSelinawaslookingupon,——asmokethathunginsullenbanksroundthemastsandthehullsofthefightingships;asmokefrombeneathwhichcamethunderandthecrashandthesplinter-rip,theshoutoftheboardingparty,thechokingsobofthegunnerstretchedbyhisgun;asmokefromoutofwhichatlastshesaw,asthrougharivenpall,theradiantspiritoftheVictor,crownedwiththecoronalofaperfectdeath,leapinfullassuranceupintotheetherthatImmortalsbreathe。Theduskwasgloomingtowardsdarknesswhensheroseandmovedslowlydowntowardsthebeckoningfire;somethingofthepriestessinherstride,somethingofthedevoteeinthesetpurposeofhereye。
Theleaveswerewellalightbythistime,andHaroldhadjustaddedanoldfurzebush,whichflamedandcrackledstirringly。
"Go’n’getsomemoresticks,"orderedSelina,"andshavings,’n’
chunksofwood,’n’anythingyoucanfind。Lookhere——inthekitchen-gardenthere’sapileofoldpea-sticks。Fetchasmanyasyoucancarry,andthengobackandbringsomemore!"
"ButIsay,——"beganHarold,amazedly,scarceknowinghissister,andwithavisionofafrenziedgardener,pea-sticklessandthreateningretribution。
"Goandfetch’emquick!"shoutedSelina,stampingwithimpatience。
Haroldranoffatonce,truetothesternsystemofdisciplineinwhichhehadbeennurtured。ButhiseyeswerelikeroundO’s,andasheranhetalkedfasttohimself,inevidentdisorderofmind。
Thepea-sticksmadearareblaze,andthefire,nolongersmoulderingsullenly,leaptupandbegantoassumetheappearanceofagenuinebonfire。Harold,awedintosilenceatfirst,begantojumprounditwithshoutsoftriumph。Selinalookedongrimly,withknittedbrow;shewasnotyetfullysatisfied。
"Can’tyougetanymoresticks?"shesaidpresently。"Goandhuntabout。Getsomeoldhampersandmattingandthingsoutofthetool-house。SmashupthatoldcucumberframeEdwardshovedyouinto,thedaywewereplayingscoutsandMohicans。Stopabit!Hooray!Iknow。Youcomealongwithme。"
Hardbytherewasahot-house,AuntEliza’sspecialprideandjoy,andevengrimlyapprovedofbythegardener。Atoneend,inanout-houseadjoining,thenecessaryfiringwasstored;andtothissacredfuel,ofwhichwewerestrictlyforbiddentotouchastick,Selinawentstraight。Haroldfollowedobediently,preparedforanycrimeafterthatofthepea-sticks,butpinchinghimselftoseeifhewerereallyawake。
"Youbringsomecoals,"saidSelinabriefly,withoutanypalaverorpro-and-condiscussion。"Here’sabasket。I’LLmanagethefaggots!"
Inaveryfewminutestherewaslittledoubtaboutitsbeingagenuinebonfireandnopaltrymakeshift。Selina,aMaenadnow,hatlessandtossingdisorderedlocks,allthedrossoftheyoungladypurgedoutofher,stalkedaroundthepyreofherownpurloining,orproddeditwithapea-stick。Andassheproddedshemurmuredatintervals,"IKNEWtherewassomethingwecoulddo!Itisn’tmuch——butstillit’sSOMETHING!"
Thegardenerhadgonehometohistea。AuntElizahaddrivenoutforhersalongwayoff,andwasnotexpectedbacktillquitelate;andthisfarendofthegardenwasnotoverlookedbyanywindows。SotheTributeblazedonmerrilyunchecked。Villagersfaraway,catchingsightoftheflare,mutteredsomethingabout"themyoungdevilsattheirtricksagain,"andtrudgedonbeer-
wards。Neverathoughtofwhatdayitwas,neverathoughtforNelson,whopreservedtheirhonestpint-pots,tobepaidforinhonestpence,andsavedthemfromlitresanddecimalcoinage。
Nearerathand,frightenedrabbitspoppedupandvanishedwithaflickofwhitetails;scaredbirdsflutteredamongthebranches,orspedacrossthegladetoquietersleeping-quarters;
butneverabirdnorabeastgaveathoughttotheherotowhomtheyoweditthateachyeartheirlittlehomesofhorsehair,wool,ormoss,weresafestablished’neaththeflapoftheBritishflag;andthatGameLaws,quietlypermanent,madelachasseaterroronlytotheirbetters。Nooneseemedtoknow,nortocare,nortosympathise。Inalltheecstasyofherburnt-
offeringandsacrifice,Selinastoodalone。
Andyet——notquitealone!For,asthefirewasroaringatitsbest,certainstarssteppeddelicatelyforthonthesurfaceoftheimmensityabove,andpeereddowndoubtfully——withwonderatfirst,thenwithinterest,thenwithrecognition,withastartofgladsurprise。THEYatleastknewallaboutit,THEY
understood。AmongTHEMtheNamewasadailyfamiliarword;hisstorywasapartofthemusictowhichtheyswung,himselfwastheirfellowandtheirmateandcomrade。Sotheypeeped,andwinked,andpeepedagain,andcalledtotheirlaggardbrotherstocomequickandsee……
"Thebestoflifeisbutintoxication;"andSelina,whoduringherbriefinebriationhadlivedinanecstasyasgoldenasourdrabexistenceaffords,hadtoexperiencetheinevitablebitternessofawakeningsobriety,whenthedyingdownoftheflamesintosullenemberscoincidedwiththefrenziedentranceofAuntElizaonthescene。Itwasnotsomuchthatshewasatonceandforeverdisrated,broke,sentbeforethemast,andbrandedasoneonwhomnoreliancecouldbeplaced,evenwithEdwardsafeatschool,andmyselfunderthedistantvigilanceofanaunt;thatherpocketmoneywasstoppedindefinitely,andhernewChurchService,theprideofherlastbirthday,removedfromherowncustodyandplacedunderthecontrolofaTrust。ShesorrowedratherbecauseshehaddraggedpoorHarold,againsthisbetterjudgment,intoamosthorriblescrape,andmoreoverbecause,whenthereactionhadfairlysetin,whentheexaltationhadfizzledawayandtheyoung-ladyportionofherhadcrepttimorouslybacktoitswontedlodging,shecouldonlyseeherselfasaplainfool,unjustified,undeniable,withoutashadowofanexcuseorexplanation。
AsforHarold,youthandashortmemorymadehiscaselesspitifulthanitseemedtohismoresensitivesister。True,hestartedupstairstohislonelycotbellowingdismally,beforehimadrearyfutureofpainsandpenalties,sufficienttolasttothecrackofdoom。Outsidehisdoor,however,hetumbledoverAugustusthecat,andmadecaptureofhim;andatoncehismourningwaschangedintoasongoftriumph,asheconveyedhisprizeintoport。ForAugustus,whodetestedaboveallthingsgoingtobedwithlittleboys,wasevermoreknavethanfool,andthetrapperwhowaswilyenoughtoensnarehimhadachievedsomethingnotable。Augustus,whenherealizedthathisfatewassealed,andhisnight’slodgingsettled,wiselymadethebestofthings,andlistened,withalanguorousairofcompletecomprehension,totheincoherentbabbleconcerningpigsandheroes,molesandbonfires,whichservedHaroldforaself-sunglullaby。YetitmaybedoubtedwhetherAugustuswasoneofthoserarefellowswhothoroughlyunderstood。
ButSelinaknewnomoreofthissourceofconsolationthanofthesympathywithwhichthestarswerewinkingaboveher;anditwasonlyaftersomesadintervaloftime,andonaverymoistpillow,thatshedriftedintothatquaintinconsequentcountrywhereyoumaymeetyourownpetherostrollingdowntheroad,andcommitwhathair-brainedodditiesyoulike,andeverybodyunderstandsandappreciates。
DIESIRAE
Thosememorabledaysthatmoveinprocession,theirheadsjustoutofthemistofyearslongdead——themostofthemarefull-
eyedasthedandelionthatfromdawntoshadehassteepeditselfinsunlight。Hereandthereintheirranks,however,movesaforlornonewhoisblind——blindinthesenseofthedulledwindow-paneonwhichthepeltingraindropshavemingledandrundown,obscuringsunshineandthecirclingbirds,happyfields,andstoriedgarden;blindwiththespatterofamiseryuncomprehended,unanalysed,onlyfeltassomethingcorporealinitsbuffetingeffects。
Marthabeganit;andyetMarthawasnotreallytoblame。Indeed,thatwashalfthetroubleofit——nosolidpersonstoodfullinview,tobeblamedandtomakeatonement。Therewasonlyawretched,impalpableconditiontodealwith。Breakfastwasjustover;thesunwassummoningus,imperiousasaheraldwithclamouroftrumpet;Iranupstairstoherwithabrokenbootlaceinmyhand,andthereshewas,cryinginacorner,herheadinherapron。Nothingcouldbegotfromherbutthesamedismalsuccessionofsobsthatwouldnothavedone,thatstruckandhurtlikeaphysicalbeating;andmeanwhilethesunwasgettingimpatient,andIwantedmybootlace。
Inquirybelowstairsrevealedthecause。Martha’sbrotherwasdead,itseemed——hersailorbrotherBilly;drownedinoneofthosestrangefar-offseasitwasourdreamtonavigateoneday。
WehadknownBillywell,andappreciatedhim。WhenanapproachingvisitofBillytohissisterhadbeenannounced,wehadcountedthedaystoit。Whenhischeeryvoicewasatlastheardinthekitchenandwehaddescendedwithshouts,firstofallhehadtoexhibithistattooedarms,alwaysasubjectforfreshdelightandenvyandawe;thenhewascalleduponfortricks,jugglings,andstrange,fearfulgymnastics;andlastlycameyarns,andmoreyarns,andyarnstillbedtime。TherehadneverbeenanyonelikeBillyinhisownparticularsphere;andnowhewasdrowned,theysaid,andMarthawasmiserable,and——andIcouldn’tgetanewbootlace。TheytoldmethatBillywouldnevercomebackanymore,andIstaredoutofthewindowatthesunwhichcameback,rightenough,everyday,andtheirnewsconveyednothingwhatevertome。Martha’ssorrowhithomealittle,butonlybecausetheactualsightandsoundofitgavemeadull,badsortofpainlowdowninside——apainnottobeactuallylocated。Moreover,Iwasstillwantingmybootlace。
Thiswasapoorsortofabeginningtoadaythat,sofarasoutsideconditionswent,hadpromisedsowell。Iriggedupasortofjurymastofabootlacewithabitofoldstring,andwanderedofftolookupthegirls,consciousofajarandadiscordanceintheschemeofthings。ThemomentIenteredtheschoolroomsomethingintheairseemedtotellmethathere,too,matterswerestrainedandawry。Selinawasstaringlistlesslyoutofthewindow,onefootcurledroundherleg。WhenIspoketohershejerkedashouldertestily,butdidnotcondescendtothecivilityofareply。Charlotte,absolutelyunoccupied,sprawledinachair,andthereweresignsofsnifflesabouther,evenatthatearlyhour。Itwasbutatriflingmatterthathadcausedallthiselectricityintheatmosphere,andthegirls’
manneroftakingitseemedtomemostunreasonable。WithinthelastfewdaysthetimehadcomeroundforthedespatchofahampertoEdwardatschool。Onlyonehamperatermwaspermittedhim,soitspreparationwasasortofblendofrevelryandreligiousceremony。Afterthemaincorpusofthethinghadbeencarefullyselectedandsafelybestowed——thepotsofjam,thecake,thesausages,andtheapplesthatfilledupcornerssonicely——afterthelastpackagehadbeenwedgedin,thegirlshaddepositedtheirownprivateandpersonalofferingsonthetop。I
forgettheirprecisenature;anyhow,theywerenothingofanyparticularpracticalusetoaboy。Buttheyhadinvolvedsomecontrivanceandlabour,someskimpingofpocketmoney,andmuchdelightfulcloud-buildingastotheeffectontheirenrapturedrecipient。Well,yesterdaytherehadcomeaterseacknowledgmentfromEdward,heartilycommendingthecakesandthejam,stampingthesausageswiththesealofSmithmajor’sapproval,andfinallyhintingthat,fortifiedashenowwas,nothingmorewasnecessarybutaremittanceoffiveshillingsinpostagestampstoenablehimtofacetheworldarmedagainsteverybuffetoffate。Thatwasall。Neverawordorahintofthepersonaltributesorofhisappreciationofthem。Tous——toHaroldandme,thatis——theletterseemednaturalandsensibleenough。Afterall,provenderwasthemainthing,andfiveshillingsstoodforacompleteequipmentagainstthemostunexpectedturnsofluck。Thepresentswereverywellintheirway——verynice,andsoon——butlifewasaseriousmatter,andthecontestcalledforcakesandhalfcrownstocarryiton,notgew-
gawsandknittedmittensandthelike。Thegirls,however,intheirobstinateway,persistedintakingtheirownviewoftheslight。HenceitwasthatIreceivedmysecondrebuffofthemorning。
Somewhatdisheartened,Imademywaydownstairsandoutintothesunlight,whereIfoundHaroldplayingconspiratorsbyhimselfonthegravel。Hehaddugasmallholeinthewalkandhadlaidanimaginarytrainofpowderthereto;and,ashesoughtrefugeinthelaurelsfromtheinevitableexplosion,Iheardhimmurmur:
"`MyGod!’saidtheCzar,`myplansarefrustrated!’"Itseemedanexcellentoccasionforbeingablackpuma。Haroldlikedblackpumas,onthewhole,aswellasanyanimalwewerefamiliarwith。
SoIlaunchedmyselfonhim,withtheappropriatehowl,rollinghimoveronthegravel。
Lifemaybesaidtobecomposedofthingsthatcomeoffandthingsthatdon’tcomeoff。Thisthing,unfortunately,wasoneofthethingsthatdidn’tcomeoff。FrombeneathmeIheardashrillcryof,"Oh,it’smysoreknee!"AndHaroldwriggledhimselffreefromthepuma’sclutches,bellowingdismally。Now,Ihonestlydidn’tknowhehadasoreknee,and,what’smore,heknewIdidn’tknowhehadasoreknee。Accordingtoboyethics,therefore,hisattitudewaswrong,sorekneeornot,andnoapologywasduefromme。Imadehalf-wayadvances,however,suggestingweshouldlieinambushbytheedgeofthepondandcutofftheducksastheywaddleddowninsimple,unsuspectingsinglefile;thenhuntthemasbisonsflyingscatteredoverthevastprairie。Afascinatingpursuitthis,andstrictlyillicit。
ButHaroldwouldnoneofmyovertures,andretreatedtothehousewailingwithfulllungs。
Thingsweregettingsimplyinfernal。Istruckoutblindlyfortheopencountry;andevenasImadeforthegateashrillvoicefromawindowbademekeepofftheflower-beds。WhenthegatehadswungtobehindmewithaviciousclickIfeltbetter,andaftertenminutesalongtheroaditbegantogrowonmethatsomeradicalchangewasneeded,thatIwasinablindalley,andthatthisintolerablestateofthingsmustsomehowcease。AllthatI
coulddoIhadalreadydone。Aswell-meaningafellowaseversteppedwaspoundingalongtheroadthatday,withanexceedingsoreheart;onewhoonlywishedtoliveandletlive,intouchwithhisfellows,andappreciatingwhatjoyslifehadtooffer。
Whatwaswantednowwasacompletechangeofenvironment。Somewhereintheworld,Ifeltsure,justiceandsympathystillresided。Therewereplacescalledpampas,forinstance,thatsoundedwell。Leagueuponleagueofgrass,withjustanoccasionalwildhorse,andnotarelationwithinthehorizon!Toabruisedspiritthisseemedasaneandahealingsortofexistence。Therewereotherpleasantcorners,again,whereyoudivedforpearlsandstabbedsharksinthestomachwithyourbigknife。Norelationswouldbelikelytocomeinterferingwithyouwhenthusblissfullyoccupied。AndyetIdidnotwish——justyet——tohavedonewithrelationsentirely。Theyshouldbemadetofeeltheirpositionfirst,toseethemselvesastheyreallywere,andtowish——whenitwastoolate——thattheyhadbehavedmoreproperly。
Ofallprofessions,thearmyseemedtolenditselfthemostthoroughlytothescheme。Youenlisted,youfollowedthedrum,youmarched,fought,andportedarms,understrangeskies,throughunrecordedyears。Atlast,atlonglast,youropportunitywouldcome,whenthehorrorsofwarwereflickeringthroughthequietcountry-sidewhereyouwerecradledandbred,butwherethememoryofyouhadlongbeendim。Folkwouldruntogether,clamorous,palsiedwithfear;andamongtheterror-strickengroupswouldfigurecertainaunts。"Whathopeisleftus?"theywouldaskthemselves,"saveintheclemencyoftheGeneral,themysterious,invincibleGeneral,ofwhommentellsuchromantictales?"Andthearmywouldmarchin,andthegunswouldrattleandleapalongthevillagestreet,and,lastofall,you——you,theGeneral,thefabledhero——youwouldenter,onyourcoal-blackcharger,yourpalesetfaceseamedbyaninterestingsabre-cut。Andthen——buteveryboyhasrehearsedthisfamiliarpieceascoreoftimes。Youaremagnanimous,infine——thatgoeswithoutsaying;youhaveacoal-blackhorse,andasabre-cut,andyoucanaffordtobeverymagnanimous。Butallthesameyougivethemagoodtalking-to。
Thispleasantconceitsimplyravishedmysoulforsometwentyminutes,andthentheoldsenseofinjurybegantowellupafresh,andtocallfornewplastersandsoothingsyrups。ThistimeItookrefugeinhappythoughtsofthesea。Theseawasmyrealsphere,afterall。Onthesea,inespecial,youcouldcombinedistinctionwithlawlessness,whereasthearmyseemedtobealwaysweightedbyacertainploddingsubmissiontodiscipline。Tobesure,byallaccounts,thelifewasatfirstaroughone。ButjustthenIwantedtosufferkeenly;Iwantedtobeapoordevilofacabinboy,kicked,beaten,andswornat——foratime。Perhapssomehint,someinklingofmysufferingsmightreachtheirears。Induecoursetheslooporfeluccawouldturnup——italwaysdid——therakish-lookingcraft,blackofhull,lowinthewater,andbristlingwithguns;thejollyRogerflappingoverhead,andmyselfforsolecommander。Byandby,asusuallyhappened,anEastIndiamanwouldcomesailingalongfullofrelations——notanecessaryrelationwouldbemissing。Andthecrewshouldwalktheplank,andthecaptainshoulddancefromhisownyardarm,andthenIwouldtakethepassengersinhand——thatmiserablegroupofwell-knownfigurescoweringonthequarter-
deck!——andthen——andthenthesameoldperformance:theairthickwithmagnanimity。Inalltherepertoryofheroes,noneismoretrulymagnanimousthanyourpiratechief。
WhenatlastIbroughtmyselfbackfromthefuturetotheactualpresent,IfoundthatthesedelectablevisionshadhelpedmeoveralongerstretchofroadthanIhadimagined;andIlookedaroundandtookmybearings。Totherightofmewasalonglowbuildingofgreystone,new,andyetnotsmuglyso;new,andyetpossessingdistinction,markedwithacharacterthatdidnotdependonlichenoroncrumblingsemi-effacementofmouldingandmullion。Strangersmighthavebeenpuzzledtoclassifyit;tome,anexplorerfromearliestyears,theplacewasfamiliarenough。Mostfolkcalledit"TheSettlement";others,withquitesufficientconcisenessforourneighbourhood,spokeof"themtherefellowsupbyHalliday’s";othersagain,withahintofderision,namedthemthe"monks。"ThislasttitleIsupposedtobeintendedforsatire,andknewtobefatuouslywrong。Iwasthoroughlyacquaintedwithmonks——inbooks——andwellknewthecutoftheirlongfrocks,theirshavenpolls,andtheirfascinatingbigdogs,withbrandy-bottlesroundtheirnecks,incessantlyhaulinghappytravellersoutofthesnow。TheonlydogatthesettlementwasanIrishterrier,andthegoodfellowswhoownedhim,andwereownedbyhim,incommon,woreclothesofthemostnondescriptorder,andmostlycultivatedside-whiskers。Ihadwanderedupthereoneday,searching(asusual)forsomethingI
neverfound,andhadbeentakeninbythemandtreatedasfriendandcomrade。Theyhadmademefreeoftheirideallittlerooms,fullofbooksandpictures,andcleanoftheantimacassartaint;
theyhadshownmetheirchapel,high,hushed;andfaintlyscented,beautifulwithastrangenewbeautybornbothofwhatithadandwhatithadnot——thattoofamiliardowdinessofcommonplacesofworship。Theyhadalsofedmeintheirdining-hall,wherealongtablestoodontrestlesplaintoview,andallthewoodworkwasnatural,unpainted,healthilyscrubbed,andredolentoftheforestitcamefrom。Ibroughtawayfromthatvisit,andkeptbymeformanydays,asenseofcleanness,ofthefreshnessthatpricksthesenses——thefreshnessofcoolspringwater;andthelargesweptspacesoftherooms,theredtiles,andtheoakensettles,suggestedacomfortthathadnoconnexionwithpaddedupholstery。
OnthisparticularmorningIwasinmuchtoounsociableamindforpayingfriendlycalls。Still,somethingintheaspectoftheplaceharmonisedwithmyhumour,andIworkedmywayroundtotheback,wheretheground,afteraffordinglevelenoughforakitchen-garden,brokesteeplyaway。BoththewordGothicandthethingitselfwerestillunknowntome;yetdoubtlessthearchitectureoftheplace,consistentthroughout,accountedforitssenseofcomradeshipinmyhourofdisheartenment。AsI
musedthere,withthelow,grey,purposeful-lookingbuildingbeforeme,andthoughtofmypleasantfriendswithin,andwhatgoodtimestheyalwaysseemedtobehaving,andhowtheylarkedwiththeIrishterrier,whosefootingwasoneofaperfectequality,Ithoughtofacertainlookintheirfaces,asiftheyhadacommonpurposeandabusiness,andwereactingunderordersthoroughlyrecognisedandunderstood。Iremembered,too,somethingthatMarthahadtoldme,aboutthesesamefellowsdoing"apowero’good,"andotherhintsIhadcollectedvaguely,ofrenouncements,rules,self-denials,andthelike。Thereupon,outofthedepthsofmymorbidsoulswamupanewandfascinatingidea;andatoncethecareerofarmsseemedover-actedandstale,andpiracy,asaprofession,flatandunprofitable。This,then,orsomethinglikeit,shouldbemyvocationandmyrevenge。
Asevererlineofbusiness,perhaps,suchasIhadreadof;
somethingthatincludedblackbreadandahair-shirt。Thereshouldbevows,too——irrevocable,bloodcurdlingvows;andanirongrating。Thisirongratingwasthemostnecessaryfeatureofall,forIintendedthatontheothersideofitmyrelationsshouldrangethemselves——Imentallyranoverthecatalogue,andsawthatthewholegangwaspresent,allintheirproperplaces——
asad-eyedrow,combinedintristfulappeal。"Weseeourerrornow,"theywouldsay;"wewerealwaysdulldogs,slowtocatch——
especiallyinthoseakintous——thefinerqualitiesofsoul!Wemisunderstoodyou,misappreciatedyou,andweownuptoit。Andnow——""Alas,mydearfriends,"Iwouldstrikeinhere,wavingtowardsthemanascetichand——oneoftheemaciatedsort,thatletsthelightshinethroughatthefinger-tips——"Alas,youcometoolate!Thisconductisfittingandmeritoriousonyourpart,andindeedIalwaysexpecteditofyou,soonerorlater;
butthedieiscast,andyoumaygohomeagainandbewailatyourleisurethistootardyrepentanceofyours。Forme,Iamvowedanddedicated,andmyrelationshenceforthareausterityandholyworks。Onceamonth,shouldyouwishit,itshallbeyourprivilegetocomeandgazeatmethroughthisverysolidgrating;
but——"WHACK!
Awell-aimedclodofgardensoil,whizzingjustpastmyear,starredonatree-trunkbehind,spatteringmewithdirt。Thepresentcamebacktomeinaflash,andInimblytookcoverbehindthetrees,realisingthattheenemywasupandabroad,withambuscades,alarms,andthrillingsallies。Itwasthegardener’sboy,Iknewwellenough;aredproletariat,whohatedmejustbecauseIwasagentleman。Hastilypickingupanicestickyclodinonehand,withtheotherIdelicatelyprojectedmyhatbeyondtheshelterofthetree-trunk。IhadnotfoughtwithRed-skinsalltheseyearsfornothing。
AsIhadexpected,anotherclod,ofthefirstclassforsizeandstickiness,tookmypoorhatfullinthecentre。Then,Ajax-
like,shoutingterribly,Iissuedfromshelteranddischargedmyammunition。Woethenforthegardener’sboy,who,unprepared,skippinginprematuretriumph,tooktheclodfullinhisstomach!
He,thefoolishone,witlessonwhosesidethegodswerefightingthatday,dischargedyetothermissiles,waveringandwideofthemark;forhiswindhadbeentakenwiththefirstclod,andheshotwildly,asonealreadydesperateandinflight。Igotanotherclodinatshortrange;weclinchedonthebrowofthehill,androlleddowntothebottomtogether。Whenhehadshakenhimselffreeandregainedhislegs,hetrottedsmartlyoffinthedirectionofhismother’scottage;butoverhisshoulderhedischargedatmebothimprecationanddeprecation,menacemixedupwithanunder-currentoftears。
Butasforme,Imadeoffsmartlyfortheroad,myframetingling,myheadhigh,withneverabackwardlookattheSettlementofsuggestiveaspect,oratmywell-plannedfuturewhichlayinfragmentsaroundit。Lifehaditsjollities,then;
lifewasaction,contest,victory!Thepresentwasrosyoncemore,surpriseslurkedoneveryside,andIwasbeginningtofeelvillainouslyhungry。
JustasIgainedtheroadacartcamerattlingby,andIrushedforit,caughtthechainthathungbelow,andswungthrillinglybetweenthedizzywheels,chokedandblindedwithdelicious-
smellingdust,theworldslippingbymelikeastreakyribbonbelow,tillthedriverlickedatmewithhiswhip,andIhadtodescendtoearthagain。Abandoningthebeatentrack,Ithenstruckhomewardsthroughthefields;notthatthewaywasverymuchshorter,butratherbecauseonthatrouteoneavoidedthebridge,andhadtosplashthroughthestreamandgetrefreshinglywet。Bridgesweremadefornarrowfolk,forpeoplewithaimsandvocationswhichcompelledabandonmentofmanyoflife’shighestpleasures。Trulywisemencalledoneachelementaliketoministertotheirjoy,andwhilethetouchofsun-bathedair,thefragranceofgardensoil,theductiblequalitiesofmud,andthespark-whirlingraptureofplayingwithfire,hadeachtheirspecialcharm,theydidnotoverlooktheblissofgettingtheirfeetwet。AsIcameforthonthecommonHaroldbrokeoutofanadjoiningcopseandrantomeetme,themorningrain-cloudsallblownawayfromhisface。Hehadmadeanewsquirrel-stick,itseemed。Madeitallhimself;meltedtheleadandeverything!
Iexaminedtheinstrumentcritically,andpronounceditabsolutelymagnificent。Aswepassedinatourgatethegirlsweredistantlyvisible,gardeningwithazealincheerfulcontrasttotheirheartsicklassitudeofthemorning。"There’sbinanotherlettercometo-day,"Haroldexplained,"andthehampergotjoggledaboutonthejourney,andthepresentsworkeddownintothestrawandallovertheplace。Oneof’emturnedupinsidethecoldduck。Andthat’swhytheyweren’tfoundatfirst。AndEdwardsaid,ThanksAWFULLY"
IdidnotseeMarthaagainuntilwewereallre-assembledattea-
time,whensheseemedred-eyedandstrangelysilent,neitherscoldingnorfindingfaultwithanything。Instead,shewasverykindandthoughtfulwithjamsandthings,feverishlypressingunwonteddelicaciesonus,whowantedlittlepressingenough。
Thensuddenly,whenIwasbusiest,shedisappeared;andCharlottewhisperedmepresentlythatshehadheardhergotoherroomandlockherselfin。Thisstruckmeasafunnysortofproceeding。
MUTABILESEMPER
Shestoodontheothersideofthegardenfence,andregardedmegravelyasIcamedowntheroad。Thenshesaid,"Hi-o!"andI
responded,"Hullo!"andpulledupsomewhatnervously。
Totellthetruth,theencounterwasnotentirelyunexpectedonmypart。ThepreviousSundayIhadseenherinchurch,andafterserviceithadtranspiredwhoshewas,thisnew-comer,andwhatauntshewasstayingwith。Thatmorningavolunteerhadbeencalledfor,totakeanotetotheParsonage,andrathertomyownsurpriseIhadfoundmyselfsteppingforwardwithalacrity,whiletheothershadbecomesuddenlyabsorbedinvariouspursuits,orhadsneakedunobtrusivelyoutofview。CertainlyIhadnotyetformedanydeliberateplanofaction;yetIsupposeI
recollectedthattheroadtotheParsonageledpastheraunt’sgarden。
Shebegantheconversation,whileIhoppedbackwardsandforwardsovertheditch,feigningacarelessease。
"SawyouinchurchonSunday,"shesaid;"onlyyoulookeddifferentthen。Alldressedup,andyourhairquitesmooth,andbrushedupatthesides,andoh,soshiny!Whatdotheyputonittomakeitshinelikethat?Don’tyouhatehavingyourhairbrushed?"sheranon,withoutwaitingforananswer。"Howyourbootssqueakedwhenyoucamedowntheaisle!Whenminesqueak,I
walkinallthepuddlestilltheystop。ThinkI’llgetoverthefence。"
Thissheproceededtodoinabusinesslikeway,while,withmyhandsdeepinmypockets,Iregardedhermovementswithsilentinterest,asthoseofsomestrangenewanimal。
"I’vebeengardening,"sheexplained,whenshehadjoinedme,"butIdidn’tlikeit。There’ssomanywormsaboutto-day。I
hateworms。Wishthey’dkeepoutofthewaywhenI’mdigging。"
"Oh,IlikewormswhenI’mdigging,"Irepliedheartily,"seemtomakethingsmorelively,don’tthey?"
Shereflected。"Shouldn’tmind’emsomuchiftheywerewarmandDRY,"shesaid,"but——"heresheshivered,andsomehowIlikedherforit,thoughifithadbeenmyownfleshandbloodhootsofderisionwouldhaveinstantlyassailedher。
Fromwormswepassed,naturallyenough,tofrogs,andthencetopigs,aunts,gardeners,rocking-horses,andotherfellow-citizensofourcommonkingdom。Infiveminuteswehadeachother’sconfidences,andIseemedtohaveknownherforalifetime。
Somehow,onthesubjectofone’sselfitwaseasiertobefrankandcommunicativewithherthanwithone’sfemalekin。Itmustbe,Isupposed,becauseshewaslessfamiliarwithone’sfaulty,tatteredpast。
"Iwaswatchingyouasyoucamealongtheroad,"shesaidpresently,"andyouhadyourheaddownandyourhandsinyourpockets,andyouweren’tthrowingstonesatanything,orwhistling,orjumpingoverthings;andIthoughtperhapsyou’dbinscolded,orgotastomach-ache。"
"No,"Iansweredshyly,"itwasn’tthat。Factis,Iwas——I
often——butit’sasecret。"
ThereImadeanerrorintactics。Thatenkindlingwordsetherdancingroundme,halfbeseeching,halfimperious。"Oh,dotellitme!"shecried。"Youmust!I’llnevertellanyoneelseatall,IvowanddeclareIwon’t!"
Hersmallframewriggledwithemotion,andwithimploringeyesshejiggedimpatientlyjustinfrontofme。Herhairwastumbledbewitchinglyonhershoulders,andeventhelossofafronttooth——alossincidentaltoherage——seemedbuttoaddapiquancytoherface。
"Youwon’tcaretohearaboutit,"Isaid,wavering。"Besides,I
can’texplainexactly。IthinkIwon’ttellyou。"ButallthetimeIknewIshouldhaveto。
"ButIDOcare,"shewailedplaintively。"Ididn’tthinkyou’dbesounkind!"
Thiswouldneverdo。Thatlittledownwardtugateithercornerofthemouth——Iknewthesymptomonlytoowell!
"It’slikethis,"Ibeganstammeringly。"Thisbitofroadhere——
upasfarasthatcorner——youknowit’sahorriddullbitofroad。I’malwayshavingtogoupanddownit,andIknowitsowell,andI’msosickofit。SowheneverIgettothatcorner,I
just——well,Igorightofftoanotherplace!"
"Whatsortofaplace?"sheasked,lookingroundhergravely。
"Ofcourseit’sjustaplaceIimagine,"Iwentonhurriedlyandrathershamefacedly:"butit’sanawfullyniceplace——thenicestplaceyoueversaw。AndIalwaysgooffthereinchurch,orduringjoggraphylessons。"
"I’msureit’snotnicerthanmyhome,"shecriedpatriotically。
"Oh,yououghttoseemyhome——it’slovely!We’vegot——"
"Yesitis,eversomuchnicer,"Iinterrupted。"Imean"——Iwentonapologetically——"ofcourseIknowyourhome’sbeautifulandallthat。ButthisMUSTbenicer,’cosifyouwantanythingatall,you’veonlyGOTtowantit,andyoucanhaveit!"
"Thatsoundsjolly,"shemurmured。"Tellmemoreaboutit,please。Tellmehowyougetthere,first。"
"I——don’t——quite——know——exactly,"Ireplied。"Ijustgo。Butgenerallyitbeginsby——well,you’regoingupabroad,clearriverinasortofaboat。You’renotrowingoranything——you’rejustmovingalong。Andthere’sbeautifulgrassmeadowsonbothsides,andtheriver’sveryfull,quiteuptothelevelofthegrass。Andyouglidealongbytheedge。Andthepeoplearehaymakingthere,andplayinggames,andwalkingabout;andtheyshouttoyou,andyoushoutbacktothem,andtheybringyouthingstoeatoutoftheirbaskets,andletyoudrinkoutoftheirbottles;andsomeof’emarethenicepeopleyoureadaboutinbooks。AndsoatlastyoucometothePalacesteps——greatbroadmarblesteps,reachingrightdowntothewater。Andthereatthestepsyoufindeverysortofboatyoucanimagine——
schooners,andpunts,androw-boats,andlittlemen-of-war。Andyouhaveanysortofboatingyouwantto——rowing,orsailing,orshovingaboutinapunt!"
"I’dgosailing,"shesaiddecidedly:"andI’dsteer。No,YOU’Dhavetosteer,andI’dsitaboutonthedeck。No,I
wouldn’tthough;I’drow——atleastI’dmakeyourow,andI’dsteer。Andthenwe’d——Oh,no!I’lltellyouwhatwe’ddo!We’djustsitinapuntanddabble!"
"Ofcoursewe’lldojustwhatyoulike,"Isaidhospitably;butalreadyIwasbeginningtofeelmylibertyofactionsomewhatcurtailedbythisexigentvisitorIhadsorashlyadmittedintomysanctum。
"Idon’tthinkwe’dboatatall,"shefinallydecided。"It’salwayssoWOBBLY。Wheredoyoucometonext?"
"Yougoupthesteps,"Icontinued,"andinatthedoor,andtheveryfirstplaceyoucometoistheChocolate-room!"
Shebrightenedupatthis,andIheardhermurmurwithgusto,"Chocolate-room!"
"It’sgoteverysortofchocolateyoucanthinkof,"Iwenton:
"softchocolate,withstickystuffinside,whiteandpink,whatgirlslike;andhardshinychocolate,thatcrackswhenyoubiteit,andtakessuchanicelongtimetosuck!"
"Ilikethesoftstuffbest,"shesaid:"’cosyoucaneatsuchalotmoreofit!"
Thiswastomeanewaspectofthechocolatequestion,andI
regardedherwithinterestandsomerespect。Withus,chocolatewasnonetoocommonathing,and,wheneverwehappenedtocomebyany,weresortedtothequaintestdevicesinordertomakeitlastout。Still,legendshadreachedusofchildrenwhoactuallyhad,fromtimetotime,asmuchchocolateastheycouldpossiblyeat;andhere,apparently,wasoneofthem。
"Youcanhaveallthecreams,"Isaidmagnanimously,"andI’lleatthehardsticks,’cosIlike’embest。"
"Oh,butyoumustn’t!"shecriedimpetuously。"YoumusteatthesameasIdo!Itisn’tnicetowanttoeatdifferent。I’lltellyouwhat——youmustgiveMEallthechocolate,andthenI’llgiveYOU——I’llgiveyouwhatyououghttohave!"
"Oh,allright,"Isaid,inasubduedsortofway。Itseemedalittlehardtobeputunderasentimentalrestrictionlikethisinone’sownChocolate-room。
"Inthenextroomyoucometo,"Iproceeded,"there’sfizzydrinks!There’samarble-slabbusinessallroundtheroom,andlittlesilvertaps;andyoujustturntherighttap,andhaveanykindoffizzydrinkyouwant。"
"Whatfizzydrinksarethere?"sheinquired。
"Oh,allsorts,"Iansweredhastily,hurryingon。(Shemightrestrictmyeatables,butI’dbehangedifIwasgoingtohavehermeddlewithmydrinks。)"Thenyougodownthecorridor,andatthebackofthepalacethere’sagreatbigpark——thefinestparkyoueversaw。Andthere’sponiestorideon,andcarriagesandcarts;andalittlerailway,allcomplete,engineandguard’svanandall;andyouworkityourself,andyoucangofirst-
class,orinthevan,orontheengine,justwhicheveryouchoose。"
"I’dgoontheengine,"shemurmureddreamily。"No,Iwouldn’t,I’d——"
"Thenthere’sallthesoldiers,"Istruckin。Reallythelinehadtobedrawnsomewhere,andIcouldnothavemyrailwaysystemdisorganisedandturnedupsidedownbyameregirl。
"There’sanyquantityof’em,finebigsoldiers,andtheyallbelongtome。Andarowofbrasscannonsallalongtheterrace!
AndeverynowandthenIgivetheorder,andtheyfireoffalltheguns!"
"No,theydon’t,"sheinterruptedhastily。"Iwon’thave’emfireoffanyguns!Youmusttell’emnotto。Ihateguns,andassoonastheybeginfiringIshallrunrightaway!"
"But——butthat’swhatthey’reTHEREfor,"Iprotested,aghast。
"Idon’tcare,"sheinsisted。"Theymustn’tdoit。Theycanwalkaboutbehindmeiftheylike,andtalktome,andcarrythings。Buttheymustn’tfireoffanyguns。"
Iwassadlyconsciousbythistimethatinthisbravepalaceofmine,whereinIwaswonttoswaggerdaily,irresponsibleandunquestioned,Iwasrapidlybecoming——sotospeak——amerelodger。
Theideaofmyfinebigsoldiersbeingtoldoffto"carrythings"!Iwasnotinclinedtotellheranymore,thoughtherestillremainedplentymoretotell。
"Anyotherboysthere?"sheaskedpresently,inacasualsortofway。
"Ohyes,"Iunguardedlyreplied。"Nicechaps,too。We’llhavegreat——"ThenIrecollectedmyself。"We’llplaywiththem,ofcourse,"Iwenton。"ButyouaregoingtobeMYfriend,aren’tyou?Andyou’llcomeinmyboat,andwe’lltravelintheguard’svantogether,andI’llstopthesoldiersfiringofftheirguns!"
Butshelookedmischievouslyaway,and——dowhatIwould——Icouldnotgethertopromise。
Justthenthestrikingofthevillageclockawokewithinmeanotherclamoroustimepiece,remindingmeofmid-daymuttonagoodhalf-mileaway,andofpenaltiesandcurtailmentsattachingtoalateappearance。Wetookahurriedfarewellofeachother,andbeforewepartedIgotfromheranadmissionthatshemightbegardeningagainthatafternoon,ifonlythewormswouldbelessaggressiveandgiveherachance。
"Remember,"IsaidasIturnedtogo,"youmustn’ttellanybodyaboutwhatI’vebeentellingyou!"
Sheappearedtohesitate,swingingonelegtoandfrowhilesheregardedmesidewayswithhalf-shuteyes。
"It’sadeadsecret,"Isaidartfully。"Asecretbetweenustwo,andnobodyknowsitexceptourselves!"
Thenshepromised,noddingviolently,big-eyed,hermouthpursedupsmall。Thedelightofrevelation,andtheblissofpossessingasecret,runeachotherveryclose。Butthelattergenerallywins——foratime。
Ihadpassedthemuttonstageandwaswelteringinwarmricepudding,beforeIfoundleisuretopauseandtakeinthingsgenerally;andthenaglanceinthedirectionofthewindowtoldme,tomydismay,thatitwasraininghard。Thiswasannoyingineveryway,for,evenifitcleareduplater,theworms——Iknewwellfromexperience——wouldbeoffensivelynumerousandfrisky。
SulkilyIsaidgraceandaccompaniedtheothersupstairstotheschoolroom;whereIgotoutmypaint-boxandresolvedtodevotemyselfseriouslytoArt,whichoflateIhadmuchneglected。
Haroldgotholdofasheetofpaperandapencil,retiredtoatableinthecorner,squaredhiselbows,andprotrudedhistongue。LiteraturehadalwaysbeenHISformofartisticexpression。
Selinahadafitofthefidgets,bredoftheunpromisingweather,and,insteadofsettlingdowntosomethingonherownaccount,mustneedswalkroundandannoyusartists,intentonembodyingourconceptionsoftheideal。ShehadbeenlookingovermyshouldersomeminutesbeforeIknewofit;orIwouldhavehadawordortwotosayuponthesubject。
"Isupposeyoucallthatthingaship,"sheremarkedcontemptuously。"Whoeverheardofapinkship?Hoo-hoo!"
Istifledmywrath,knowingthatinordertoscoreproperlyitwasnecessarytokeepacoolhead。
"Thereisapinkship,"Iobservedwithforcedcalmness,"lyinginthetoy-shopwindownow。Youcangoandlookatitifyoulike。D’yousupposeyouknowmoreaboutshipsthanthefellowswhomake’em?"
Selina,baffledforthemoment,returnedtothechargepresently。
"Thosearefunnythings,too,"sheobserved。"S’posethey’remeanttobetrees。Butthey’reBLUE。"
"TheyAREtrees,"Irepliedwithseverity;"andtheyARE
blue。They’vegottobeblue,’cosyoustolemygambogelastweek,soIcan’tmixupanygreen。"
"DIDN’Tstealyourgamboge,"declaredSelina,haughtily,edgingaway,however,inthedirectionofHarold。"AndI
wouldn’ttelllies,either,ifIwasyou,aboutadirtylittlebitofgamboge。"
Ipreservedadiscreetsilence。Afterall,IknewSHEknewshestolemygamboge。
第1章