[BILLYsitsdownonedgeofchair。LORETTAseatsherselfbytable。Billy,withoutrising,jerkshischairforwardtilltheyarefacingeachother,hiskneestouchinghers。Heyearnstowardher。Shemovesbackherchairslightly。]
BILLY。[Withsupremeconfidence。]That’swhatIcametoseeyoufor——togetengagedoveragain。
[BILLYhudgeschairforwardandtriestotakeherhand。]
[LORETTAhudgesherchairback。]
BILLY。[Drawingoutlargesilverwatchandlookingatit。]Nowlookhere,Loretta,Ihaven’tanytimetolose。I’vegottoleaveforthattrainintenminutes。AndIwantyoutosettheday。
LORETTA。Butwe’renotengaged,Billy。Sotherecan’tbeanysettingoftheday。
BILLY。[Withconfidence。]Butwe’regoingtobe。[Suddenlybreakingout。]Oh,Loretta,ifyouonlyknewhowI’vesuffered。
ThatfirstnightIdidn’tsleepawink。Ihaven’tsleptmucheversince。[Hudgeschairforward。]Iwalkthefloorallnight。
[Solemnly。]Loretta,Idon’teatenoughtokeepacanarybirdalive。Loretta……[Hudgeschairforward。]
LORETTA。[Hudgingherchairbackmaternally。]Billy,whatyouneedisatonic。HaveyouseenDoctorHaskins?
BILLY。[Lookingatwatchandevincingsignsofhaste。]Loretta,whenagirlkissesaman,itmeanssheisgoingtomarryhim。
LORETTA。Iknowit,Billy。But……[Sheglancestowardlettersontable。]CaptainKittdoesn’twantmetomarryyou。Hesays……[Shetakesletterandbeginstoopenit。]
BILLY。NevermindwhatCaptainKittsays。Hewantsyoutostayandbecompanyforyoursister。Hedoesn’twantyoutomarrymebecauseheknowsshewantstokeepyou。
LORETTA。Daisydoesn’twanttokeepme。Shewantsnothingbutmyownhappiness。Shesays——[Shetakessecondletterfromtableandbeginstoopenit。]
BILLY。NevermindwhatDaisysays—
LORETTA。[Takingthirdletterfromtableandbeginningtoopenit。]AndMarthasays—
BILLY。[Angrily。]DarnMarthaandthewholeboilingofthem!
LORETTA。[Reprovingly。]Oh,Billy!
BILLY。[Defensively。]Darnisn’tswearing,andyouknowitisn’t。
[Thereisanawkwardpause。Billyhaslostthethreadoftheconversationandhasvacantexpression。]
BILLY。[Suddenlyrecollecting。]NevermindCaptainKitt,andDaisy,andMartha,andwhattheywant。Thequestionis,whatdoyouwant?
LORETTA。[Appealingly。]Oh,Billy,I’msounhappy。
BILLY。[Ignoringtheappealandpressinghomethepoint。]Thethingis,doyouwanttomarryme?[Helooksathiswatch。]Justanswerthat。
LORETTA。Aren’tyouafraidyou’llmissthattrain?
BILLY。Darnthetrain!
LORETTA。[Reprovingly。]Oh,Billy!
BILLY。[Mostirascibly。]Darnisn’tswearing。[Plaintively。]
That’sthewayyoualwaysputmeoff。Ididn’tcomeallthewayhereforatrain。Icameforyou。Nowjustanswermeonething。
Doyouwanttomarryme?
LORETTA。[Firmly。]No,Idon’twanttomarryyou。
BILLY。[Withassurance。]Butyou’vegotto,justthesame。
LORETTA。[Withdefiance。]Gotto?
BILLY。[Withunshakenassurance。]That’swhatIsaid——gotto。
AndI’llseethatyoudo。
LORETTA。[Blazingwithanger。]Iamnolongerachild。Youcan’tbullyme,BillyMarsh!
BILLY。[Coolly。]I’mnottryingtobullyyou。I’mtryingtosaveyourreputation。
LORETTA。[Faintly。]Reputation?
BILLY。[Nodding。]Yes,reputation。[Hepausesforamoment,thenspeaksverysolemnly。]Loretta,whenawomankissesaman,she’sgottomarryhim。
LORETTA。[Appalled,faintly。]Gotto?
BILLY。[Dogmatically。]Itisthecustom。
LORETTA。[Brokenly。]Andwhen……a……awomankissesamananddoesn’t……marryhim……?
BILLY。Thenthereisascandal。That’swhereallthescandalsyouseeinthepaperscomefrom。
[BILLYlooksatwatch。]
[LORETTAinsilentdespair。]
LORETTA。[Inabasement。]Youareagoodman,Billy。[Billyshowsthathebelievesit。]AndIamaverywickedwoman。
BILLY。No,you’renot,Loretta。Youjustdidn’tknow。
LORETTA。[Withagleamofhope。]Butyoukissedmefirst。
BILLY。Itdoesn’tmatter。Youletmekissyou。
LORETTA。[Hopedyingdown。]Butnotatfirst。
BILLY。Butyoudidafterwardandthat’swhatcounts。Youletmeyouinthegrape—arbour。Youletme—
LORETTA。[Withanguish]Don’t!Don’t!
BILLY。[Relentlessly。]——kissyouwhenyouwereplayingthepiano。
Youletmekissyouthatdayofthepicnic。AndIcan’trememberallthetimesyouletmekissyougoodnight。
LORETTA。[Beginningtoweep。]Notmorethanfive。
BILLY。[Withconviction。]Eightatleast。
LORETTA。[Reproachfully,stillweeping。]Youtoldmeitwasallright。
BILLY。[Emphatically。]Soitwasallright——untilyousaidyouwouldn’tmarrymeafterall。Thenitwasascandal——onlynooneknowsityet。Ifyoumarrymenooneeverwillknowit。[Looksatwatch。]I’vegottogo。[Standsup。]Where’smyhat?
LORETTA。[Sobbing。]Thisisawful。
BILLY。[Approvingly。]Youbetit’sawful。Andthere’sonlyonewayout。[Looksanxiouslyaboutforhat。]Whatdoyousay?
LORETTA。[Brokenly。]Imustthink。I’llwritetoyou。
[Faintly。]Thetrain?Yourhat’sinthehall。
BILLY。[Looksatwatch,hastilytriestokissher,succeedsonlyinshakinghand,startsacrossstagetowardleft。]Allright。
Youwritetome。Writeto—morrow。[Stopsforamomentindoor—
wayandspeaksverysolemnly。]Remember,Loretta,theremustbenoscandal。
[Billygoesout。]
[LORETTAsitsinchairquietlyweeping。Slowlydrieseyes,risesfromchair,andstands,undecidedastowhatshewilldonext。]
[NEDentersfromright,peeping。DiscoversthatLORETTAisalone,andcomesquietlyacrossstagetoher。WhenNEDcomesuptohershebeginsweepingagainandtriestoturnherheadaway。NED
catchesbothherhandsinhisandcompelshertolookathim。Sheweepsharder。]
NED。[Puttingonearmprotectinglyaroundhershoulderanddrawinghertowardhim。]There,there,littleone,don’tcry。
LORETTA。[Turningherfacetohisshoulderlikeatiredchild,sobbing。]Oh,Ned,ifyouonlyknewhowwickedIam。
NED。[Smilingindulgently。]Whatisthematter,littleone?Hasyourdearlybelovedsisterfailedtowritetoyou?[LORETTA
shakeshead。]HasHemingwaybeenbullyingyou?[LORETTAshakeshead。]Thenitmusthavebeenthatcallerofyours?[Longpause,duringwhichLORETTA’sweepinggrowsmoreviolent。]Tellmewhat’sthematter,andwe’llseewhatIcando。[Helightlykissesherhair——solightlythatshedoesnotknow。]
LORETTA。[Sobbing。]Ican’t。Youwilldespiseme。Oh,Ned,I
amsoashamed。
NED。[Laughingincredulously。]Letusforgetallaboutit。I
wanttotellyousomethingthatmaymakemeveryhappy。Myfondesthopeisthatitwillmakeyouhappy,too。Loretta,Iloveyou—
LORETTA。[Utteringasharpcryofdelight,thenmoaning。]Toolate!
NED。[Surprised。]Toolate?
LORETTA。[Stillmoaning。]Oh,whydidI?[NEDsomewhatstiffens。]Iwassoyoung。Ididnotknowtheworldthen。
NED。Whatisitallaboutanyway?
LORETTA。Oh,I……he……Billy……Iamawickedwoman,Ned。Iknowyouwillneverspeaktomeagain。
NED。This……er……thisBilly——whathashebeendoing?
LORETTA。I……he……Ididn’tknow。Iwassoyoung。I
couldnothelpit。Oh,Ishallgomad,Ishallgomad!
[NED’sencirclingarmgoeslimp。Hegentlydisengagesheranddepositsherinbigchair。]
[LORETTAburiesherfaceandsobsafresh。]
NED。[Twistingmoustachefiercely,regardingherdubiously,hesitatingamoment,thendrawingupchairandsittingdown。]I……Idonotunderstand。
LORETTA。[Wailing。]Iamsounhappy!
NED。[Inquisitorially。]Whyunhappy?
LORETTA。Because……he……hewantstomarryme。
NED。[Hisfacebrighteninginstantly,leaningforwardandlayingahandsoothinglyonhers。]Thatshouldnotmakeanygirlunhappy。Becauseyoudon’tlovehimisnoreason——[Abruptlybreakingoff。]Ofcourseyoudon’tlovehim?[LORETTAshakesherheadandshouldersvigorously。]What?
LORETTA。[Explosively。]No,Idon’tloveBilly!Idon’twanttoloveBilly!
NED。[Withconfidence。]Becauseyoudon’tlovehimisnoreasonthatyoushouldbeunhappyjustbecausehehasproposedtoyou。
LORETTA。[Sobbing。]That’sthetrouble。IwishIdidlovehim。
Oh,IwishIweredead。
NED。[Growingcomplacent。]Nowmydearchild,youareworryingyourselfovertrifles。[Hissecondhandjoinsthefirstinholdingherhands。]Womendoiteveryday。Becauseyouhavechangedyourmind,ordidnotknowyoumind,becauseyouhave——touseanunnecessarilyharshword——jiltedaman—
LORETTA。[Interrupting,raisingherheadandlookingathim。]
Jilted?OhNed,ifthatwereaall!
NED。[Hollowvoice。]All!
[NED’shandsslowlyretreatfromhers。Heopenshismouthasthoughtospeakfurther,thenchangeshismindandremainssilent。]
LORETTA。[Protestingly。]ButIdon’twanttomarryhim!
NED。ThenIshouldn’t。
LORETTA。ButIoughttomarryhim。
NED。OUGHTtomarryhim?[LORETTAnods。]Thatisastrongword。
LORETTA。[Nodding。]Iknowitis。[Herlipsaretrembling,butshestrivesforcontrolandmanagestospeakmorecalmly。]Iamawickedwoman。Aterriblewickedwoman。NooneknowshowwickedI
am……exceptBilly。
NED。[Starting,lookingatherqueerly。]He……Billyknows?
[LORETTAnods。Hedebateswithhimselfamoment。]Tellmeaboutit。Youmusttellmeallofit。
LORETTA。[Faintly,asthoughabouttoweepagain。]Allofit?
NED。[Firmly。]Yes,allofit。
LORETTA。[Haltingly。]And……will……you……ever……
forgive……me?
NED。[Drawingalong,breath,desperately。]Yes,I’llforgiveyou。Goahead。
LORETTA。Therewasnoonetotellme。Wewerewitheachothersomuch。Ididnotknowanythingoftheworld……then。[Pauses。]
NED。[Impatiently。]Goon。
LORETTA。IfIhadonlyknown。[Pauses。]
NED。[Bitinghislipandclenchinghishands。]Yes,yes。Goon。
LORETTA。Weweretogetheralmosteveryevening。
NED。[Savagely。]Billy?
LORETTA。Yes,ofcourse,Billy。Wewerewitheachothersomuch……IfIhadonlyknown……Therewasnoonetotellme……
Iwassoyoung……[Breaksdowncrying。]
NED。[Leapingtohisfeet,explosively。]Thescoundrel!
LORETTA。[Liftingherhead。]Billyisnotascoundrel……He……he……isagoodman。
NED。[Sarcastically。]Isupposeyou’llbetellingmenextthatitwasallyourfault。[LORETTAnods。]What!
LORETTA。[Steadily。]Itwasallmyfault。Ishouldneverhavelethim。Iwastoblame。
NED。[Pacesupanddownforaminute,stopsinfrontofher,andspeakswithresignation。]Allright。Idon’tblameyouintheleast,Loretta。Andyouhavebeenveryhonest。Itis……er……commendable。ButBillyisright,andyouarewrong。Youmustgetmarried。
LORETTA。[Indim,far—awayvoice。]ToBilly?
NED。Yes,toBilly。I’llseetoit。Wheredoeshelive?I’llmakehim。Ifhewon’tI’ll……I’llshoothim!
LORETTA。[Cryingoutwithalarm。]Oh,Ned,youwon’tdothat?
NED。[Sternly。]Ishall。
LORETTA。ButIdon’twanttomarryBilly。
NED。[Sternly。]Youmust。AndBillymust。Doyouunderstand?
Itistheonlything。
LORETTA。That’swhatBillysaid。
NED。[Triumphantly。]Yousee,Iamright。
LORETTA。Andif……ifIdon’tmarryhim……therewillbe……scandal?
NED。[Calmly。]Yes,therewillbescandal。
LORETTA。That’swhatBillysaid。Oh,Iamsounhappy!
[LORETTAbreaksdownintoviolentweeping。]
[NEDpacesgrimlyupanddown,nowandagainfiercelytwistinghismoustache。]
LORETTA。[Faceburied,sobbingandcryingallthetime。]
Idon’twanttoleaveDaisy!Idon’twanttoleaveDaisy!WhatshallIdo?WhatshallIdo?HowwasItoknow?Hedidn’ttellme。Nobodyelseeverkissedme。[NEDstopscuriouslytolisten。
Ashelistenshisfacebrightens。]Ineverdreamedakisscouldbesoterrible……until……untilhetoldme。Heonlytoldmethismorning。
NED。[Abruptly。]Isthatwhatyouarecryingabout?
LORETTA。[Reluctantly。]N—no。
NED。[Inhopelessvoice,thebrightnessgoneoutofhisface,abouttobeginpacingagain。]Thenwhatareyoucryingabout?
LORETTA。BecauseyousaidIhadtomarryBilly。Idon’twanttomarryBilly。Idon’twanttoleaveDaisy。Idon’tknowwhatI
want。IwishIweredead。
NED。[Nervinghimselfforanothereffort。]Nowlookhere,Loretta,besensible。Whatisthisaboutkisses?Youhaven’ttoldmeeverythingafterall。
LORETTA。I……Idon’twanttotellyoueverything。
NED。[Imperatively。]Youmust。
LORETTA。[Surrendering。]Well,then……mustI?
NED。Youmust。
LORETTA。[Floundering。]He……I……we……Ilethim,andhekissedme。
NED。[Desperately,controllinghimself。]Goon。
LORETTA。Hesayseight,butIcan’tthinkofmorethanfivetimes。
NED。Yes,goon。
LORETTA。That’sall。
NED。[Withvastincredulity。]All?
LORETTA。[Puzzled。]All?
NED。[Awkwardly。]Imean……er……nothingworse?
LORETTA。[Puzzled。]Worse?Asthoughtherecouldbe。Billysaid—
NED。[Interrupting。]When?
LORETTA。Thisafternoon。Justnow。Billysaidthatmy……our……our……ourkisseswereterribleifwedidn’tgetmarried。
NED。Whatelsedidhesay?
LORETTA。Hesaidthatwhenawomanpermittedamantokisshershealwaysmarriedhim。Thatitwasawfulifshedidn’t。Itwasthecustom,hesaid;andIsayitisabad,wickedcustom,andithasbrokenmyheart。Ishallneverbehappyagain。IknowIamterrible,butIcan’thelpit。Imusthavebeenbornwicked。
NED。[Absent—mindedlybringingoutacigaretteandstrikingamatch。]DoyoumindifIsmoke?[Comingtohimselfagain,andflingingawaymatchandcigarette。]Ibegyourpardon。Idon’twanttosmoke。Ididn’tmeanthatatall。WhatImeanis……
[HebendsoverLORETTA,catchesherhandsinhis,thensitsonarmofchair,softlyputsonearmaroundher,andisabouttokissher。]
LORETTA。[Withhorror,repulsinghim。]No!No!
NED。[Surprised。]What’sthematter?
LORETTA。[Agitatedly。]WouldyoumakemeawickederwomanthanI
am?
NED。Akiss?
LORETTA。Therewillbeanotherscandal。Thatwouldmaketwoscandals。
NED。TokissthewomanIlove……ascandal?
LORETTA。Billylovesme,andhesaidso。
NED。Billyisajoker……orelseheisasinnocentasyou。
LORETTA。Butyousaidsoyourself。
NED。[Takenaback。]I?
LORETTA。Yes,yousaidityourself,withyourownlips,nottenminutesago。Ishallneverbelieveyouagain。
NED。[Masterfullyputtingarmaroundheranddrawinghertowardhim。]AndIamajoker,too,andaverywickedman。
Nevertheless,youmusttrustme。Therewillbenothingwrong。
LORETTA。[Preparingtoyield。]Andno……scandal?
NED。Scandalfiddlesticks。Loretta,Iwantyoutobemywife。
[Hewaitsanxiously。]
[JACKHEMINGWAY,infishingcostume,appearsindoorwaytorightandlookson。]
NED。Youmightsaysomething。
LORETTA。Iwill……if……
[ALICEHEMINGWAYappearsindoorwaytoleftandlookson。]
NED。[Insuspense。]Yes,goon。
LORETTA。IfIdon’thavetomarryBilly。
NED。[Almostshouting。]Youcan’tmarrybothofus!
LORETTA。[Sadly,repulsinghimwithherhands。]Then,Ned,I
cannotmarryyou。
NED。[Dumbfounded。]W—what?
LORETTA。[Sadly。]BecauseIcan’tmarrybothofyou。
NED。Boshandnonsense!
LORETTA。I’dliketomarryyou,but……
NED。Thereisnothingtopreventyou。
LORETTA。[Withsadconviction。]Oh,yes,thereis。YousaidyourselfthatIhadtomarryBilly。Yousaidyouwoulds—s—shoothimifhedidn’t。
NED。[Drawinghertowardhim。]Nevertheless……
LORETTA。[Slightlyholdinghimoff。]Anditisn’tthecustom……what……Billysaid?
NED。No,itisn’tthecustom。Now,Loretta,willyoumarryme?
LORETTA。[Poutingdemurely。]Don’tbeangrywithme,Ned。[Hegathersherintohisarmsandkissesher。Shepartiallyfreesherself,gasping。]Iwishitwerethecustom,becausenowI’dhavetomarryyou,Ned,wouldn’tI?
[NEDandLORETTAkissasecondtimeandprofoundly。]
[JACKHEMINGWAYchuckles。]
[NEDandLORETTA,startled,butstillineachother’sarms,lookaround。NEDlookssillilyatALICEHEMINGWAY。LORETTAlooksatJACKHEMINGWAY。]
LORETTA。Idon’tcare。
CURTAIN
THEBIRTHMARK
SKETCHBYJACKLONDONwrittenforRobertandJuliaFitzsimmonsSCENE——OneoftheclubroomsoftheWestBayAthleticClub。Nearcentrefrontisalargetablecoveredwithnewspapersandmagazines。Atleftapunching—bagapparatus。Atright,againstwall,adesk,onwhichrestsadesk—telephone。Dooratreartowardleft。Onwallsareframedpicturesofpugilists,conspicuousamongwhichisoneofRobertFitzsimmons。Appropriatefurnishings,etc。,suchasfoils,clubs,dumb—bellsandtrophies。
[EnterMAUDSYLVESTER。]
[Sheisdressedasaman,ineveningclothes,preferablyaTuxedo。
Inherhandisacard,andunderherarmapaper—wrappedparcel。
Shepeepsaboutcuriouslyandadvancestotable。Sheistimorousandexcited,elatedandatthesametimefrightened。Hereyesaredancingwithexcitement。]
MAUD。[Pausingbytable。]Notasoulsawme。Iwonderwhereeverybodyis。AndthatbigbrotherofminesaidIcouldnotgetin。[Shereadsbackofcard。]"Hereismycard,Maudie。Ifyoucanuseit,goahead。Butyouwillnevergetinsidethedoor。I
considermybetasgoodaswon。"[Lookingup,triumphantly。]Youdo,doyou?Oh,ifyoucouldseeyourlittlesisternow。Heresheis,inside。[Pauses,andlooksabout。]SothisistheWestBayAthleticClub。Nowomenallowed。Well,hereIam,ifIdon’tlooklikeone。[Stretchesoutonelegandthentheother,andlooksatthem。Leavingcardandparcelontable,shestrutsaroundlikeaman,looksatpicturesofpugilistsonwalls,readingaloudtheirnamesandmakingappropriateremarks。ButshestopsbeforetheportraitofFitzsimmonsandreadsaloud。]
"RobertFitzsimmons,thegreatestwarriorofthemall。"[Claspshands,andlookingupatportraitmurmurs。]Oh,youdear!
[Continuesstruttingaround,imitatingwhatsheconsidersareaman’sstrideandswagger,returnstotableandproceedstounwrapparcel。]Well,I’llgooutlikeagirl,ifIdidcomeinlikeaman。[Dropswrappingpaperontableandholdsupawoman’slongautomobilecloakandamotorbonnet。Issuddenlystartledbysoundofapproachingfootstepsandglancesinafrightenedwaytowarddoor。]Mercy!Herecomessomebodynow![Glancesaboutherinalarm,dropscloakandbonnetonfloorclosetotable,seizesahandfulofnewspapers,andrunstolargeleatherchairtorightoftable,wheresheseatsherselfhurriedly。Onepapersheholdsupbeforeher,hidingherfaceasshepretendstoread。
Unfortunatelythepaperisupsidedown。Theotherpaperslieonherlap。]
[EnterROBERTFITZSIMMONS。]
[Helooksabout,advancestotable,takesoutcigarettecaseandisabouttoselectone,whenhenoticesmotorcloakandbonnetonfloor。Helayscigarettecaseontableandpicksthemup。Theystrikehimasprofoundlycuriousthingstobeinaclubroom。HelooksatMAUD,thenseescardontable。Hepicksitupandreachittohimself,thenlooksatherwithcomprehension。Hiddenbyhernewspaper,sheseesnothing。Helooksatcardagainandreadsandspeaksinanaside。]
FITZSIMMONS。"Maudie。JohnH。Sylvester。"ThatmustbeJackSylvester’ssisterMaud。[FITZSIMMONSshowsbyhisexpressionthatheisgoingtoplayajoke。Tossingcloakandbonnetunderthetableheplacescardinhisvestpocket,selectsachair,sitsdown,andlooksatMAUD。Henotespaperisupsidedown,ishugelytickled,andlaughssilently。]Hello![Newspaperisagitatedbyslighttremor。Hespeaksmoreloudly。]Hello![Newspapershakesbadly。Hespeaksveryloudly。]Hello!
MAUD。[Peepingathimovertopofpaperandspeakinghesitatingly。]H—h—hello!
FITZSIMMONS。[Gruffly。]Youareaqueerone,readingapaperupsidedown。
MAUD。[Loweringnewspaperandtryingtoappearatease。]It’squiteatrick,isn’tit?Ioftenpractiseit。I’mrealcleveratit,youknow。
FITZSIMMONS。[Grunts,thenadds。]SeemstomeIhaveseenyoubefore。
MAUD。[Glancingquicklyfromhisfacetoportraitandbackagain。]Yes,andIknowyou——YouareRobertFitzsimmons。
FITZSIMMONS。IthoughtIknewyou。
MAUD。Yes,itwasoutinSanFrancisco。Mypeoplestilllivethere。I’mjust——ahem——doingNewYork。
FITZSIMMONS。ButIdon’tquiterememberthename。
MAUD。Jones——HarryJones。
FITZSIMMONS。[Hugelydelighted,leapingfromchairandstridingovertoher。]Sure。[Slapsherresoundinglyonshoulder。]
[Sheisnearlycrushedbytheweightoftheblow,andatthesametimeshocked。Shescramblestoherfeet。]
FITZSIMMONS。Gladtoseeyou,Harry。[Hewringsherhand,sothatithurts。]Gladtoseeyouagain,Harry。[Hecontinueswringingherhandandpumpingherarm。]
MAUD。[Strugglingtowithdrawherhandandfinallysucceeding。
Hervoiceisratherfaint。]Ye—es,er……Bob……er……
gladtoseeyouagain。[Shelooksruefullyatherbruisedfingersandsinksintochair。Then,recollectingherpart,shecrossesherlegsinamannishway。]
FITZSIMMONS。[Crossingtodeskatright,againstwhichheleans,facingher。]YouwereawildyoungrascalinthoseSanFranciscodays。[Chuckling。]Lord,Lord,howitallcomesbacktome。
MAUD。[Boastfully。]Iwaswild——some。
FITZSIMMONS。[Grinning。]Ishouldsay!RememberthatnightI
putyoutobed?
MAUD。[Forgettingherself,indignantly。]Sir!
FITZSIMMONS。Youwere……er……drunk。
MAUD。Ineverwas!
FITZSIMMONS。Surelyyouhaven’tforgottenthatnight!Youbeganwithdroppingchampagnebottlesoutoftheclubwindowsontheheadsofthepeopleonthesidewalk,andyouwoundupbyassaultingacabman。AndletmetellyouIsavedyoufromagoodlickingrightthere,andsquareditwiththepolice。Don’tyouremember?
MAUD。[Noddinghesitatingly。]Yes,itisbeginningtocomebacktome。Iwasabittightthatnight。
FITZSIMMONS。[Exultantly。]Abittight!Why,beforeIcouldgetyoutobedyouinsistedontellingmethestoryofyourlife。
MAUD。DidI?Idon’trememberthat。
FITZSIMMONS。Ishouldsaynot。Youwerepastrememberinganythingbythattime。Youhadyourarmsaroundmyneck—
MAUD。[Interrupting。]Oh!
FITZSIMMONS。Andyoukeptrepeatingoverandover,"Bob,dearBob。"
MAUD。[Springingtoherfeet。]Oh!Ineverdid![Recollectingherself。]PerhapsImusthave。Iwasatriflewildinthosedays,Iadmit。ButI’mwisenow。I’vesowedmywildoatsandsteadieddown。
FITZSIMMONS。I’mgladtohearthat,Harry。Youweretearingoffaprettyfastpaceinthosedays。[Pause,inwhichMAUDnods。]
Stillpunchthebag?
MAUD。[Inquickalarm,glancingatpunchingbag。]No,I’vegotoutofthehangofit。
FITZSIMMONS。[Reproachfully。]Youhaven’tforgottenthatright—
and—left,arm,elbowandshouldermovementItaughtyou?
MAUD。[Withhesitation。]N—o—o。
FITZSIMMONS。[Movingtowardbagtoleft。]Then,comeon。
MAUD。[Risingreluctantlyandfollowing。]I’dratherseeyoupunchthebag。I’djustloveto。
FITZSIMMONS。Iwill,afterward。Yougotoitfirst。
MAUD。[Eyeingthebaginalarm。]No;you。I’moutofpractice。
FITZSIMMONS。[Lookingathersharply。]Howmanydrinkshaveyouhadto—night?
MAUD。Notaone。Idon’tdrink——thatis——er——onlyoccasionally。
FITZSIMMONS。[Indicatingbag。]Thengotoit。
MAUD。No;ItellyouIamoutofpractice。I’veforgottenitall。Yousee,Imadeadiscovery。
[Pauses。]
FITZSIMMONS。Yes?
MAUD。I——I——yourememberwhatalightvoiceIalwayshad——almostsoprano?
[FITZSIMMONSnods。]
MAUD。Well,Idiscovereditwasaperfectfalsetto。
[FITZSIMMONSnods。]
MAUD。I’vebeenpractisingiteversince。Experts,inanotherroom,wouldswearitwasawoman’svoice。Sowouldyou,ifyouturnedyourbackandIsang。
FITZSIMMONS。[Whohasbeenlaughingincredulously,nowbecomessuspicious。]Lookhere,kid,Ithinkyouareanimpostor。YouarenotHarryJonesatall。
MAUD。Iam,too。
FITZSIMMONS。Idon’tbelieveit。Hewasheavierthanyou。
MAUD。Ihadthefeverlastsummerandlostalotofweight。
FITZSIMMONS。YouaretheHarryJonesthatgotsousesdandhadtobeputtobed?
MAUD。Y—e—s。
FITZSIMMONS。ThereisonethingIrememberverydistinctly。
HarryJoneshadabirthmarkonhisknee。[Helooksatherlegssearchingly。]
MAUD。[Embarrassed,thenresolvingtocarryitout。]Yes,righthere。[Sheadvancesrightlegandtouchesit。]
FITZSIMMONS。[Triumphantly。]Wrong。Itwastheotherknee。
MAUD。Ioughttoknow。
FITZSIMMONS。Youhaven’tanybirthmarkatall。
MAUD。Ihave,too。
FITZSIMMONS。[Suddenlyspringingtoherandattemptingtoseizeherleg。]Thenwe’llproveit。Letmesee。
MAUD。[Inapanicbacksawayfromhimandresistshisattempts,untilgrinninginanasidetotheaudience,hegivesover。She,inanasidetoaudience。]Fancyhiswantingtoseemybirthmark。
FITZSIMMONS。[Bullying。]Thentakeagoatthebag。[Sheshakesherhead。]You’renotHarryJones。
MAUD。[Approachingpunchingbag。]Iam,too。
FITZSIMMONS。Thenhitit。
MAUD。[Resolvingtoattemptit,hitsbagseveralniceblows,andthenisstruckonthenosebyit。]Oh!
[Recoveringherselfandrubbinghernose。]ItoldyouIwasoutofpractice。Youpunchthebag,Bob。
FITZSIMMONS。Iwill,ifyouwillshowmewhatyoucandowiththatwonderfulsopranovoiceofyours。
MAUD。Idon’tdare。Everybodywouldthinktherewasawomanintheclub。
FITZSIMMONS。[Shakinghishead。]No,theywon’t。They’veallgonetothefight。There’snotasoulinthebuilding。
MAUD。[Alarmed,inaweakvoice。]Not——a——soul——in——thebuilding?
FITZSIMMONS。Notasoul。OnlyyouandI。
MAUD。[Startinghurriedlytowarddoor。]ThenImustgo。
FITZSIMMONS。What’syourhurry?Sing。
MAUD。[Turningbackwithnewresolve。]Letmeseeyoupunchthebag,——er——Bob。
FITZSIMMONS。Yousingfirst。
MAUD。No;youpunchfirst。
FITZSIMMONS。Idon’tbelieveyouareHarry—
MAUD。[Hastily。]Allright,I’llsing。Yousitdownoverthereandturnyourback。
[FITZSIMMONSobeys。]
[MAUDwalksovertothetabletowardright。Sheisabouttosing,whenshenoticesFITZSIMMONS’cigarettecase,picksitup,andinanasidereadshisnameonitandspeaks。]
MAUD。"RobertFitzsimmons。"ThatwillprovetomybrotherthatI
havebeenhere。
FITZSIMMONS。Hurryup。
[MAUDhastilyputscigarettecaseinherpocketandbeginstosing。]
SONG
[DuringthesongFITZSIMMONSturnshisheadslowlyandlooksatherwithgrowingadmiration。]
MAUD。Howdidyoulikeit?
FITZSIMMONS。[Gruffly。]Rotten。Anybodycouldtellitwasaboy’svoice—
MAUD。Oh!
FITZSIMMONS。Itisroughandcoarseanditcrackedoneveryhighnote。
MAUD。Oh!Oh!
[Recollectingherselfandshrugginghershoulders。]Oh,verywell。Nowlet’sseeifyoucandoanybetterwiththebag。
[FITZSIMMONStakesoffcoatandgivesexhibition。]
[MAUDlooksoninanecstasyofadmiration。]
MAUD。[Ashefinishes。]Beautiful!Beautiful!
[FITZSIMMONSputsoncoatandgoesoverandsitsdownneartable。]
Nothinglikethebagtolimberoneup。Ifeellikeafightingcock。Harry,let’sgooutonatoot,youandI。
MAUD。Wh—a—a—t?
FITZSIMMONS。Atoot。Youknow——oneofthoserip—snortingnightsyouusedtomake。
MAUD。[Emphatically,asshepicksupnewspapersfromleatherchair,sitsdown,andplacesthemonherlap。]I’lldonothingofthesort。I’ve——I’vereformed。
FITZSIMMONS。Youusedtojoy—rideliketheverydevil。
MAUD。Iknowit。
FITZSIMMONS。Andyoualwayshadaprettygirlortwoalong。
MAUD。[Boastfully,inmannish,fashion。]Oh,Istillhavemyfling。Doyouknowany——well,——er,——nicegirls?
FITZSIMMONS。Sure。
MAUD。Putmewise。
FITZSIMMONS。Sure。YouknowJackSylvester?
MAUD。[Forgettingherself。]He’smybrother—
FITZSIMMONS。[Exploding。]What!
MAUD。——In—law’sfirstcousin。
FITZSIMMONS。Oh!
MAUD。SoyouseeIdon’tknowhimverywell。Ionlymethimonce——attheclub。Wehadadrinktogether。
FITZSIMMONS。Thenyoudon’tknowhissister?
MAUD。[Starting。]Hissister?I——Ididn’tknowhehadasister。
FITZSIMMONS。[Enthusiastically。]She’sapeach。Aqueen。A
littlebitofallright。A——aloo—loo。
MAUD。[Flattered。]Sheis,isshe?
FITZSIMMONS。She’sascream。Yououghttogetacquaintedwithher。
MAUD。[Slyly。]Youknowher,then?
FITZSIMMONS。Youbet。
MAUD。[Aside。]Oh,ho![ToFITZSIMMONS。]Knowherverywell?
FITZSIMMONS。I’vetakenheroutmoretimesthanIcanremember。
You’lllikeher,I’msure。
MAUD。Thanks。Tellmesomemoreabouther。
FITZSIMMONS。Shedressesabitloud。Butyouwon’tmindthat。
Andwhateveryoudo,don’ttakehertoeat。
MAUD。[Hidingherchagrin。]Whynot?
FITZSIMMONS。Ineversawsuchanappetite—
MAUD。Oh!
FITZSIMMONS。It’sfairsickening。Shemusthaveatape—worm。
Andshethinksshecansing。
MAUD。Yes?
FITZSIMMONS。Rotten。Youcandobetteryourself,andthat’snotsayingmuch。She’sanicegirl,reallysheis,butsheistheblacksheepofthefamily。Funny,isn’tit?
MAUD。[Weakvoice。]Yes,funny。
FITZSIMMONS。HerbrotherJackisallright。Buthecan’tdoanythingwithher。She’sa——a—
MAUD。[Grimly。]Yes。Goon。
FITZSIMMONS。Aholyterror。Sheoughttobeinareformschool。
MAUD。[Springingtoherfeetandslammingnewspapersinhisface。]Oh!Oh!Oh!Youliar!Sheisn’tanythingofthesort!
FITZSIMMONS。[Recoveringfromtheonslaughtandmakingbelieveheisangry,advancingthreateninglyonher。]NowI’mgoingtoputaheadonyou。Youyounghoodlum。
MAUD。[Allalarmandcontrition,backingawayfromhim。]Don’t!
Pleasedon’t!I’msorry!Iapologise。I——Ibegyourpardon,Bob。OnlyIdon’tliketoheargirlstalkedaboutthatway,even—
—evenifitistrue。Andyououghttoknow。
FITZSIMMONS。[Subsidingandresumingseat。]You’vechangedalot,Imustsay。
MAUD。[Sittingdowninleatherchair。]ItoldyouI’dreformed。
Letustalkaboutsomethingelse。Whyisitgirlslikeprize—
fighters?Ishouldthink——ahem——Imeanitseemstomethatgirlswouldthinkprize—fightershorrid。
FITZSIMMONS。Theyaremen。
MAUD。Butthereissomuchcrookednessinthegame。Onehearsaboutitallthetime。
FITZSIMMONS。Therearecrookedmenineverybusinessandprofession。Thebestfightersarenotcrooked。
MAUD。I——er——Ithoughttheyallfakedfightswhentherewasenoughinit。
FITZSIMMONS。Notthebestones。
MAUD。Didyou——er——everfakeafight?
FITZSIMMONS。[Lookingathersharply,thenspeakingsolemnly。]
Yes。Once。
MAUD。[Shocked,speakingsadly。]AndIalwaysheardofyouandthoughtofyouastheonecleanchampionwhoneverfaked。
FITZSIMMONS。[Gentlyandseriously。]Letmetellyouaboutit。
ItwasdowninAustralia。Ihadjustbeguntofightmywayup。
ItwaswitholdBillHobartoutatRushcuttersBay。Ithrewthefighttohim。
MAUD。[Repelled,disgusted。]Oh!Icouldnothavebelieveditofyou。
FITZSIMMONS。Letmetellyouaboutit。Billwasanoldfighter。
Notanoldman,youknow,buthe’dbeeninthefightinggamealongtime。Hewasaboutthirty—eightandagamermanneverenteredthering。Buthewasinhardluck。Youngerfighterswerecomingup,andhewasbeingcrowdedout。Atthattimeitwasn’toftenhegotafightandthepursesweresmall。BesidesitwasadroughtyearinAustralia。Youdon’tknowwhatthatmeans。Itmeansthattherangersarestarved。Itmeansthatthesheeparestarvedanddiebythemillions。Itmeansthatthereisnomoneyandnowork,andthatthemenandwomenandkiddiesstarve。
BillHobarthadamissusandthreekidsandatthetimeofhisfightwithmetheywereallstarving。Theydidnothaveenoughtoeat。Doyouunderstand?Theydidnothaveenoughtoeat。AndBilldidnothaveenoughtoeat。Hetrainedonanemptystomach,whichisnowaytotrainyou’lladmit。Duringthatdroughtyeartherewaslittleenoughmoneyinthering,buthehadfailedtogetanyfights。Hehadworkedatlong—shoring,ditch—digging,coal—shovelling——anything,tokeepthelifeinthemissusandthekiddies。Thetroublewasthejobsdidn’tholdout。Andtherehewas,matchedtofightwithme,behindinhisrent,atougholdchopping—block,butweakfromlackoffood。Ifhedidnotwinthefight,thelandlordwasgoingtoputthemintothestreet。
MAUD。Butwhywouldyouwanttofightwithhiminsuchweakcondition?
FITZSIMMONS。Ididnotknow。Ididnotlearntillattheringsidejustbeforethefight。Itwasinthedressingrooms,waitingourturntogoon。Billcameoutofhisroom,readyforthering。"Bill,"Isaid——infun,youknow。"Bill,I’vegottodoyouto—night。"Hesaidnothing,buthelookedatmewiththesaddestandmostpitifulfaceIhaveeverseen。Hewentbackintohisdressingroomandsatdown。
"PoorBill!"oneofmysecondssaid。"He’sbeenfairstarvingtheselastweeks。AndI’vegotitstraight,thelandlordchuckshimoutifhelosesto—night。"
Thenthecallcameandwewentintothering。Billwasdesperate。
Hefoughtlikeatiger,amadman。Hewasfaircrazy。HewasfightingformorethanIwasfightingfor。Iwasarisingfighter,andIwasfightingforthemoneyandtherecognition。
ButBillwasfightingforlife——forthelifeofhislovedones。
Well,conditiontold。Thestrengthwentoutofhim,andIwasfreshasadaisy。"What’sthematter,Bill?"Isaidtohiminaclinch。"You’reweak。""Iain’thadabittoeatthisday,"heanswered。Thatwasall。
Bytheseventhroundhewasaboutallin,hangingonandpantingandsobbingforbreathintheclinches,andIknewIcouldputhimoutanytime。Idrewbackmyrightfortheshort—armjabthatwoulddothebusiness。Heknewitwascoming,andhewaspowerlesstopreventit。
"FortheloveofGod,Bob,"hesaid;and——[Pause。]
MAUD。Yes?Yes?
FITZSIMMONS。Iheldbacktheblow。Wewereinaclinch。
"FortheloveofGod,Bob,"hesaidagain,"themissesandthekiddies!"
AndrightthereIsawandknewitall。Isawthehungrychildrenasleep,andthemissussittingupandwaitingforBilltocomehome,waitingtoknowwhethertheyweretohavefoodtoeatorbethrownoutinthestreet。
"Bill,"Isaid,inthenextclinch,solowonlyhecouldhear。
"Bill,remembertheLaBlancheswing。Giveittome,hard。"
Webrokeaway,andhewastotteringandgroggy。Hestaggeredawayandstartedtowhirltheswing。Isawitcoming。ImadebelieveIdidn’tandstartedafterhiminarush。Biff!Itcaughtmeonthejaw,andIwentdown。Iwasyoungandstrong。Icouldeatpunishment。Icouldhavegotupthefirstsecond。ButIlaythereandletthemcountmeout。AndmakingbelieveIwasstilldazed,Iletthemcarrymetomycornerandworktobringmeto。
[Pause。]
Well,Ifakedthatfight。
MAUD。[Springingtohimandshakinghishand。]ThankGod!Oh!
Youareaman!A——a——ahero!
FITZSIMMONS。[Dryly,feelinginhispocket。]Let’shaveasmoke。
[Hefailstofindcigarettecase。]
MAUD。Ican’ttellyouhowgladIamyoutoldmethat。
FITZSIMMONS。[Gruffly。]Forgetit。[Helooksontable,andfailstofindcigarettecase。Looksathersuspiciously,thencrossestodeskatrightandreachesfortelephone。]
MAUD。[Curiously。]Whatareyougoingtodo?
FITZSIMMONS。Callthepolice。
MAUD。Whatfor?
FITZSIMMONS。Foryou。
MAUD。Forme?
FITZSIMMONS。YouarenotHarryJones。Andnotonlyareyouanimpostor,butyouareathief。
MAUD。[Indignantly。]Howdareyou?
FITZSIMMONS。Youhavestolenmycigarettecase。
MAUD。[Rememberingandtakenaback,pullsoutcigarettecase。]
Hereitis。
FITZSIMMONS。Toolate。Itwon’tsaveyou。Thisclubmustbekeptrespectable。Thievescannotbetolerated。
MAUD。[Growingalarm。]Butyouwon’thavemearrested?
FITZSIMMONS。Icertainlywill。
MAUD。[Pleadingly。]Please!Please!
FITZSIMMONS。[Obdurately。]IseenoreasonwhyIshouldnot。
MAUD。[Hurriedly,inapanic。]I’llgiveyouareason——a——agoodone。I——I——amnotHarryJones。
FITZSIMMONS。[Grimly。]Agoodreasoninitselftocallinthepolice。
MAUD。Thatisn’tthereason。I’m——a——Oh!I’msoashamed。
FITZSIMMONS。[Sternly。]Ishouldsayyououghttobe。[Reachesfortelephonereceiver。]
MAUD。[Inrushofdesperation。]Stop!I’ma——I’ma——agirl。
There![Sinksdowninchair,buryingherfaceinherhands。]
[FITZSIMMONS,hangingupreceiver,grunts。]
[MAUDremoveshandsandlooksathimindignantly。Asshespeaksherindignationgrows。]
MAUD。IonlywantedyourcigarettecasetoprovetomybrotherthatIhadbeenhere。I——I’mMaudSylvester,andyounevertookmeoutonce。AndI’mnotablacksheep。AndIdon’tdressloudly,andIhaven’ta——atapeworm。
FITZSIMMONS。[Grinningandpullingoutcardfromvestpocket。]
IknewyouwereMissSylvesterallthetime。
MAUD。Oh!Youbrute!I’llneverspeaktoyouagain。
FITZSIMMONS。[Gently。]You’llletmeseeyousafelyoutofhere。
MAUD。[Relenting。]Ye—e—s。[Sherises,crossestotable,andisabouttostoopformotorcloakandbonnet,butheforestallher,holdscloakandhelpsherintoit。]Thankyou。[Shetakesoffwig,fluffsherownhairbecomingly,andputsonbonnet,lookingeveryinchaprettyyounggirl,readyforanautomobileride。]
FITZSIMMONS。[Who,allthetime,watchinghertransformation,hasbeengrowingbashful,nowhandingherthecigarettecase。]Here’sthecigarettecase。Youmayk—k—keepit。
MAUD。[Lookingathim,hesitates,thentakesit。]Ithankyou——
er——Bob。Ishalltreasureitallmylife。[Heisveryembarrassed。]Why,Idobelieveyou’rebashful。Whatisthematter?
FITZSIMMONS。[Stammering。]Why——I——you——Youareagirl——and——a—
—a——deucedprettyone。
MAUD。[Takinghisarm,readytostartfordoor。]Butyouknewitallalong。
FITZSIMMONS。Butit’ssomehowdifferentnowwhenyou’vegotyourgirl’sclotheson。
MAUD。Butyouweren’tabitbashful——ornice,when——you——you——
[Blurtingitout。]Weresoanxiousaboutbirthmarks。
[Theystarttomakeexit。]
CURTAIN
第3章