HYPATIA。Idontblameyouforfallinginlovewithme。Ishallbegratefultoyouallmylifeforit，becausethatwasthefirsttimethatanythingreallyinterestinghappenedtome。
　　LORDSUMMERHAYS。Doyoumeantotellmethatnothingofthatkindhadeverhappenedbefore？thatnomanhadever——
　　HYPATIA。Oh，lots。Thatspartoftheroutineoflifehere：theverydullestpartofit。Theyoungmanwhocomesa—courtingisasfamiliaranincidentinmylifeascoffeeforbreakfast。Ofcourse，hestoomuchofagentlemantomisbehavehimself；andI’mtoomuchofaladytolethim；andhesshyandsheepish；andI’mcorrectandself—possessed；andatlast，whenIcanbearitnolonger，Ieitherfrightenhimoff，orgivehimachanceofproposing，justtoseehowhe’lldoit，andrefusehimbecausehedoesitinthesamesillywayasalltherest。Youdontcallthataneventinone’slife，doyou？
　　Withyouitwasdifferent。IshouldassoonhaveexpectedtheNorthPoletofallinlovewithmeasyou。YouknowI’monlyalinen—draper’sdaughterwhenall’ssaid。Iwasafraidofyou：you，agreatman!alord!andolderthanmyfather。Andthenwhatasituationitwas!Justthinkofit!Iwasengagedtoyourson；andyouknewnothingaboutit。Hewasafraidtotellyou：hebroughtyoudownherebecausehethoughtifhecouldthrowustogetherIcouldgetroundyoubecauseIwassucharippinggirl。Wearrangeditall：heandI。WegotPapaandMammaandJohnnyoutofthewaysplendidly；
　　andthenBentleytookhimselfoff，andleftus——youandme!——totakeawalkthroughtheheatherandadmirethesceneryofHindhead。Youneverdreamtthatitwasallaplan：thatwhatmademesonicewasthewayIwasplayinguptomydestinyasthesweetgirlthatwastomakeyourboyhappy。Andthen!andthen!_[Sherisestodanceandclapherhandsinherglee]。_
　　LORDSUMMERHAYS。_[shuddering]_Stop，stop。Cannowomanunderstandaman’sdelicacy？
　　HYPATIA。_[revellingintherecollection]_Andthen——ha，ha!——youproposed。You!Afather!Foryourson’sgirl!
　　LORDSUMMERHAYS。Stop，Itellyou。Dontprofanewhatyoudontunderstand。
　　HYPATIA。Thatwassomethinghappeningatlastwithavengeance。Itwassplendid。Itwasmyfirstpeepbehindthescenes。IfI’dbeenseventeenIshouldhavefalleninlovewithyou。Evenasitis，I
　　feelquitedifferentlytowardsyoufromwhatIdotowardsotheroldmen。So_[offeringherhand]_youmaykissmyhandifthatwillbeanyfunforyou。
　　LORDSUMMERHAYS。_[risingandrecoilingtothetable，deeplyrevolted]_No，no，no。Howdareyou？_[Shelaughsmischievously]。_
　　Howcallousyouthis!Howcoarse!Howcynical!Howruthlesslycruel!
　　HYPATIA。Stuff!It’sonlythatyouretiredofagreatmanythingsIvenevertried。
　　LORDSUMMERHAYS。It’snotalonethat。Ivenotforgottenthebrutalityofmyownboyhood。Butdotrytolearn，gloriousyoungbeastthatyouare，thatageissqueamish，sentimental，fastidious。
　　Ifyoucantunderstandmyholierfeelings，atleastyouknowthebodilyinfirmitiesoftheold。YouknowthatIdarenteatalltherichthingsyougobbleupateverymeal；thatIcantbearthenoiseandracketandclatterthataffectyounomorethantheyaffectastone。Well，mysoulislikethattoo。Spareit：begentlewithit_[heinvoluntarilyputsouthishandstoplead：shetakesthemwithalaugh]。_Ifyoucouldpossiblythinkofmeashalfanangelandhalfaninvalid，weshouldgetonmuchbettertogether。
　　HYPATIA。Wegetonverywell，Ithink。Nobodyelseevercalledmeagloriousyoungbeast。Ilikethat。GloriousyoungbeastexpressesexactlywhatIliketobe。
　　LORDSUMMERHAYS。_[extricatinghishandsandsittingdown]_Whereonearthdidyougetthesemorbidtastes？Youseemtohavebeenwellbroughtupinanormal，healthy，respectable，middle—classfamily。
　　YetyougoonlikethemostunwholesomeproductoftherankestBohemianism。
　　HYPATIA。Thatsjustit。I’mfedupwith——
　　LORDSUMMERHAYS。Horribleexpression。Dont。
　　HYPATIA。Oh，Idaresayit’svulgar；buttheresnootherwordforit。
　　I’mfedupwithnicethings：withrespectability，withpropriety!
　　Whenawomanhasnothingtodo，moneyandrespectabilitymeanthatnothingiseverallowedtohappentoher。Idontwanttobegood；andIdontwanttobebad：Ijustdontwanttobebotheredabouteithergoodorbad：Iwanttobeanactiveverb。
　　LORDSUMMERHAYS。Anactiveverb？Oh，Isee。Anactiveverbsignifiestobe，todo，ortosuffer。
　　HYPATIA。Justso：howcleverofyou!Iwanttobe；Iwanttodo；
　　andI’mgametosufferifitcoststhat。ButstickheredoingnothingbutbeinggoodandniceandladylikeIsimplywont。Staydownherewithusforaweek；andI’llshewyouwhatitmeans：shewittoyougoingondayafterday，yearafteryear，lifetimeafterlifetime。
　　LORDSUMMERHAYS。Shewmewhat？
　　HYPATIA。Girlswitheringintoladies。Ladieswitheringintooldmaids。Nursingoldwomen。Runningerrandsforoldmen。Goodfornothingelseatlast。Oh，youcantimaginethefiendishselfishnessoftheoldpeopleandthemaudlinsacrificeoftheyoung。It’smoreunbearablethananypoverty：morehorriblethananyregular—right—downwickedness。Oh，home!home!parents!family!duty!
　　howIloathethem!HowI’dliketoseethemallblowntobits!Thepoorescape。Thewickedescape。Well，Icantbepoor：we’rerollinginmoney：it’snousepretendingwe’renot。ButIcanbewicked；andI’mquitepreparedtobe。
　　LORDSUMMERHAYS。Youthinkthateasy？
　　HYPATIA。Well，isntit？Beingaman，yououghttoknow。
　　LORDSUMMERHAYS。Itrequiressomenaturaltalent，whichcannodoubtbecultivated。It’snotreallyeasytobeanythingoutofthecommon。
　　HYPATIA。Anyhow，Imeantomakeafightforliving。
　　LORDSUMMERHAYS。Livingyourownlife，IbelievetheSuffragistphraseis。
　　HYPATIA。Livinganylife。Living，insteadofwitheringwithoutevenagardenertosnipyouoffwhenyourerotten。
　　LORDSUMMERHAYS。Ivelivedanactivelife；butIvewitheredallthesame。
　　HYPATIA。No：youvewornout：thatsquitedifferent。Andyouvesomelifeinyouyetoryouwouldnthavefalleninlovewithme。YoucanneverimaginehowdelightedIwastofindthatinsteadofbeingthecorrectsortofbigpanjandrumyouweresupposedtobe，youwerereallyanoldriplikepapa。
　　LORDSUMMERHAYS。No，no：notaboutyourfather：Ireallycantbearit。Andifyoumustsaytheseterriblethings：theseheart—woundingshamefulthings，atleastfindsomethingprettiertocallmethananoldrip。
　　HYPATIA。Well，whatwouldyoucallamanproposingtoagirlwhomightbe——
　　LORDSUMMERHAYS。Hisdaughter：yes，Iknow。
　　HYPATIA。Iwasgoingtosayhisgranddaughter。
　　LORDSUMMERHAYS。Youalwayshaveonemoreblowtogetin。
　　HYPATIA。Youretoosensitive。Didyouevermakemudpieswhenyouwereakid——begpardon：achild。
　　LORDSUMMERHAYS。Ihopenot。
　　HYPATIA。It’sadirtyjob；butJohnnyandIwerevulgarenoughtolikeit。Ilikeyoungpeoplebecausetheyrenottooafraidofdirttolive。Ivegrownoutofthemudpies；butIlikeslang；andIlikebustlingyouupbysayingthingsthatshockyou；andI’dratherputupwithswearingandsmokingthanwithdullrespectability；andtherearelotsofthingsthatwouldjustshrivelyouupthatIthinkratherjolly。Now!
　　LORDSUMMERHAYS。Ivenottheslightestdoubtofit。Dontinsist。
　　HYPATIA。It’snotyourideal，isit？
　　LORDSUMMERHAYS。No。
　　HYPATIA。ShallItellyouwhy？Youridealisanoldwoman。I
　　daresayshesgotayoungface；butshesanoldwoman。Old，old，old。
　　Squeamish。Cantstanduptothings。Cantenjoythings：notrealthings。Alwaysontheshrink。
　　LORDSUMMERHAYS。Ontheshrink!Detestableexpression。
　　HYPATIA。Bah!youcantstandevenalittlethinglikethat。Whatgoodareyou？Oh，whatgoodareyou？
　　LORDSUMMERHAYS。Dontaskme。Idontknow。Idontknow。
　　_Tarletonreturnsfromthevestibule。Hypatiasitsdowndemurely。_
　　HYPATIA。Well，papa：haveyoumeditatedonyourdestiny？
　　TARLETON。_[puzzled]_What？Oh!mydestiny。Gad，Iforgotallaboutit：Jockstartedarabbitandputitcleanoutofmyhead。
　　Besides，whyshouldIgivewaytomorbidintrospection？It’sasignofmadness。ReadLombroso。_[ToLordSummerhays]_Well，Summerhays，hasmylittlegirlbeenentertainingyou？
　　LORDSUMMERHAYS。Yes。Sheisawonderfulentertainer。
　　TARLETON。Ithinkmyideaofbringingupayounggirlhasbeenratherasuccess。Dontyoulistentothis，Patsy：itmightmakeyouconceited。Shesneverbeentreatedlikeachild。Ialwayssaidthesamethingtohermother。Letherreadwhatshelikes。Letherdowhatshelikes。Lethergowhereshelikes。Eh，Patsy？
　　HYPATIA。Ohyes，iftherehadonlybeenanythingformetodo，anyplaceformetogo，anythingIwantedtoread。
　　TARLETON。There，yousee!Shesnotsatisfied。Restless。Wantsthingstohappen。Wantsadventurestodropoutofthesky。
　　HYPATIA。_[gatheringupherwork]_Ifyouregoingtotalkaboutmeandmyeducation，I’moff。
　　TARLETON。Well，well，offwithyou。_[ToLordSummerhays]_Shesactive，likeme。Sheactuallywantedmetoputherintotheshop。
　　HYPATIA。Well，theytellmethatthegirlstherehaveadventuressometimes。_[Shegoesoutthroughtheinnerdoor]_
　　TARLETON。Shehadmethere，thoughshedoesntknowit，poorinnocentlamb!Publicscandalexaggeratesenormously，ofcourse；butmoralizeasyouwill，superabundantvitalityisaphysicalfactthatcantbetalkedaway。_[Hesitsdownbetweenthewritingtableandthesideboard]。_Difficultquestionthis，ofbringingupchildren。
　　Betweenourselves，ithasbeatenme。IneverwassosurprisedinmylifeaswhenIcametoknowJohnnyasamanofbusinessandfoundoutwhathewasreallylike。Howdidyoumanagewithyoursons？
　　LORDSUMMERHAYS。Well，Ireallyhadnttimetobeafather：thatstheplaintruthofthematter。Theirpoordearmotherdidtheusualthingwhiletheywerewithus。Thenofcourse，Harrow，Cambridge，theusualroutineoftheirclass。Isawverylittleofthem，andthoughtverylittleaboutthem：howcouldI？withawholeprovinceonmyhands。
　　TheyandIare——acquaintances。Notperhaps，quiteordinaryacquaintances：theresasortof——er——Ishouldalmostcallitasortofremorseaboutthewayweshakehands（whenwedoshakehands）whichmeans，Isuppose，thatwe’resorrywedontcaremoreforoneanother；
　　andI’mafraidwedontmeetoftenerthanwecanhelp。Weputeachothertoomuchoutofcountenance。It’sreallyaverydifficultrelation。Tomymindnotaltogetheranaturalone。
　　TARLETON。_[impressed，asusual]_Thatsanidea，certainly。Idontthinkanybodyhaseverwrittenaboutthat。
　　LORDSUMMERHAYS。Bentleyistheonlyonewhowasreallymysoninanyserioussense。Hewascompletelyspoilt。Whenhewassenttoapreparatoryschoolhesimplyyelleduntilhewassenthome。Harrowwasoutofthequestion；butwemanagedtotutorhimintoCambridge。
　　Nouse：hewassentdown。Bythattimemyworkwasover；andIsawagooddealofhim。ButIcoulddonothingwithhim——exceptlookon。I
　　shouldhavethoughtyourcasewasquitedifferent。Youkeepupthemiddle—classtradition：thedayschoolandthebusinesstraininginsteadoftheuniversity。Ibelieveinthedayschoolpartofit。
　　Atallevents，youknowyourownchildren。
　　TARLETON。Doyou？I’mnotsosureofit。Factis，mydearSummerhays，oncechildhoodisover，oncethelittleanimalhasgotpastthestageatwhichitacquireswhatyoumightcallasenseofdecency，it’sallupwiththerelationbetweenparentandchild。Youcantgetoverthefearfulshynessofit。
　　LORDSUMMERHAYS。Shyness？
　　TARLETON。Yes，shyness。ReadDickens。
　　LORDSUMMERHAYS_[surprised]_Dickens!!Ofallauthors，CharlesDickens!Areyouserious？
　　TARLETON。Idontmeanhisbooks。Readhisletterstohisfamily。
　　Readanyman’sletterstohischildren。Theyrenothuman。Theyrenotabouthimselforthemselves。Theyreabouthotels，scenery，abouttheweather，aboutgettingwetandlosingthetrainandwhathesawontheroadandallthat。Notawordabouthimself。Forced。Shy。Dutyletters。Allfittobepublished：thatsayseverything。Itellyoutheresawalltenfeetthickandtenmileshighbetweenparentandchild。IknowwhatI’mtalkingabout。Ivegirlsinmyemployment：
　　girlsandyoungmen。Ihadideasonthesubject。Iusedtogototheparentsandtellthemnottolettheirchildrengooutintotheworldwithoutinstructioninthedangersandtemptationstheyweregoingtobethrowninto。Whatdideveryoneofthemotherssaytome？"Oh，sir，howcouldIspeakofsuchthingstomyowndaughter？"ThemensaidIwasquiteright；buttheydidntdoit，anymorethanI’dbeenabletodoitmyselftoJohnny。Ihadtoleavebooksinhisway；andIfeltjustawfulwhenIdidit。Believeme，Summerhays，therelationbetweentheyoungandtheoldshouldbeaninnocentrelation。Itshouldbesomethingtheycouldtalkabout。Well，therelationbetweenparentandchildmaybeanaffectionaterelation。Itmaybeausefulrelation。Itmaybeanecessaryrelation。Butitcanneverbeaninnocentrelation。Youddieratherthanalludetoit。Dependonit，inathousandyearsitllbeconsideredbadformtoknowwhoyourfatherandmotherare。Embarrassing。BetterhandBentleyovertome。
　　Icanlookhiminthefaceandtalktohimasmantoman。YoucanhaveJohnny。
　　LORDSUMMERHAYS。Thankyou。Ivelivedsolonginacountrywhereamanmayhavefiftysons，whoarenomoretohimthanaregimentofsoldiers，thatI’mafraidIvelosttheEnglishfeelingaboutit。
　　TARLETON。_[restlessagain]_YoumeanJinghiskahn。Ahyes。Goodthingtheempire。Educatesus。Opensourminds。KnockstheBibleoutofus。Andcivilizestheotherchaps。
　　LORDSUMMERHAYS。Yes：itcivilizesthem。Andituncivilizesus。
　　Theirgain。Ourloss，Tarleton，believeme，ourloss。
　　TARLETON。Well，whynot？Averagesoutthehumanrace。MakestheniggerhalfanEnglishman。MakestheEnglishmanhalfanigger。
　　LORDSUMMERHAYS。SpeakingastheunfortunateEnglishmaninquestion，Idontliketheprocess。IfIhadmylifetoliveoveragain，I’dstayathomeandsupercivilizemyself。
　　TARLETON。Nonsense!dontbeselfish。Thinkhowyouveimprovedtheotherchaps。LookattheSpanishempire!BadjobforSpain，butsplendidforSouthAmerica。LookatwhattheRomansdidforBritain!
　　Theyburstupandhadtoclearout；butthinkofalltheytaughtus!
　　Theywerethemakingofus：IbelievetherewasaRomancamponHindhead：I’llshewittoyoutomorrow。ThatsthegoodsideofImperialism：it’sunselfish。IdespisetheLittleEnglanders：
　　theyrealwaysthinkingaboutEngland。Smallminded。I’mfortheParliamentofman，thefederationoftheworld。ReadTennyson。_[Hesettlesdownagain]。_Thentheresthegreatfoodquestion。
　　LORDSUMMERHAYS。_[apprehensively]_Needwegointothatthisafternoon？
　　TARLETON。No；butIwishyoudtelltheChickabiddythattheJinghiskahnseatnoendoftoastedcheese，andthatit’sthesecretoftheiramazinghealthandlonglife!
　　LORDSUMMERHAYS。Unfortunatelytheyareneitherhealthynorlonglived。Andtheydonteattoastedcheese。
　　TARLETON。Thereyouare!Theywouldbeiftheyateit。Anyhow，saywhatyoulike，providedthemoralisaWelshrabbitformysupper。
　　LORDSUMMERHAYS。Britishmoralityinanutshell!
　　TARLETON。_[hugelyamused]_Yes。Haha!Awfulhypocrites，aintwe？
　　_Theyareinterruptedbyexcitedcriesfromthegrounds。_
　　HYPATIA。Papa!Mamma!Comeoutasfastasyoucan。
　　Quick。Quick。
　　BENTLEY。Hello，governor!Comeout。Anaeroplane。
　　Look，look。
　　TARLETON。_[startingup]_Aeroplane!Didhesayanaeroplane？
　　LORDSUMMERHAYS。Aeroplane!_[Ashadowfallsonthepavilion；andsomeoftheglassatthetopisshatteredandfallsonthefloor]。_
　　_TarletonandLordSummerhaysrushoutthroughthepavilionintothegarden。_
　　HYPATIA。Takecare。Takecareofthechimney。
　　BENTLEY。Comethisside：it’scomingrightwhereyourestanding。
　　TARLETON。Hallo!wherethedevilareyoucoming？youllhavemyroofoff。
　　LORDSUMMERHAYSHe’slostcontrol。
　　MRSTARLETON。Look，look，Hypatia。Therearetwopeopleinit。
　　BENTLEY。Theyveclearedit。Wellsteered!
　　TARLETON。Yes；buttheyrecomingslamintothegreenhouse。
　　LORDSUMMERHAYSLookoutfortheglass。
　　MRSTARLETON。Theyllbreakalltheglass。Theyllspoilallthegrapes。
　　BENTLEY。Mindwhereyourecoming。He’llsaveit。No：theyredown。
　　_Anappallingcrashofbreakingglassisheard。Everybodyshrieks。_
　　MRSTARLETON。Oh，aretheykilled？John：aretheykilled？
　　LORDSUMMERHAYSAreyouhurt？Isanythingbroken？Canyoustand？
　　HYPATIA。Oh，youmustbehurt。Areyousure？ShallIgetyousomewater？Orsomewine？
　　TARLETON。Areyouallright？Sureyouwonthavesomebrandyjusttotakeofftheshock。
　　THEAVIATOR。No，thankyou。Quiteright。Notascratch。IassureyouI’mallright。
　　BENTLEY。Whatluck!Andwhatasmash!Youarealuckychap，Icantellyou。
　　_TheAviatorandTarletoncomeinthroughthepavilion，followedbyLordSummerhaysandBentley，theAviatoronTarleton’sright。BentleypassestheAviatorandturnstohaveanadmiringlookathim。LordSummerhaysovertakesTarletonlesspointedlyontheoppositesidewiththesameobject。_
　　THEAVIATOR。I’mreallyverysorry。I’mafraidIveknockedyourvineryintoacockedhat。（_Effusively_）Youdontmind，doyou？
　　TARLETON。Notabit。Comeinandhavesometea。Staytodinner。
　　Stayovertheweek—end。AllmylifeIvewantedtofly。
　　THEAVIATOR。_[takingoffhisgoggles]_Yourereallymorethankind。
　　BENTLEY。Why，itsJoeyPercival。
　　PERCIVAL。Hallo，Ben!Thatyou？
　　TARLETON。What!Themanwiththreefathers!
　　PERCIVAL。Oh!hasBenbeentalkingaboutme？
　　TARLETON。Consideryourselfasoneofthefamily——ifyouwilldomethehonor。Andyourfriendtoo。Wheresyourfriend？
　　PERCIVAL。Oh，bytheway!beforehecomesin：letmeexplain。I
　　dontknowhim。
　　TARLETON。Eh？
　　PERCIVAL。Havntevenlookedathim。I’mtryingtomakeaclubrecordwithapassenger。Theclubsuppliedthepassenger。Hejustgotin；
　　andIvebeentoobusyhandlingtheaeroplanetolookathim。Ihavntsaidawordtohim；andIcantanswerforhimsocially；buthesanidealpassengerforaflyer。Hesavedmefromasmash。
　　LORDSUMMERHAYS。Isawit。Itwasextraordinary。Whenyouwerethrownoutheheldontothetopbarwithonehand。Youcamepasthimintheair，goingstraightfortheglass。Hecaughtyouandturnedyouoffintotheflowerbed，andthenlightedbesideyoulikeabird。
　　PERCIVAL。HowhekepthisheadIcantimagine。Frankly，_I_didnt。
　　_ThePassenger，alsobegoggled，comesinthroughthepavilionwithJohnnyandthetwoladies。ThePassengercomesbetweenPercivalandTarleton，MrsTarletonbetweenLordSummerhaysandherhusband，HypatiabetweenPercivalandBentley，andJohnnytoBentley’sright。_
　　TARLETON。Justdiscussingyourprowess，mydearsir。Magnificent。
　　Youllstaytodinner。Youllstaythenight。Stayovertheweek。TheChickabiddywillbedelighted。
　　MRSTARLETON。Wontyoutakeoffyourgogglesandhavesometea？
　　_ThePassengerbeginstoremovethegoggles。_
　　TARLETON。Do。Haveawash。Johnny：takethegentlemantoyourroom：I’lllookafterMrPercival。Theymust——
　　_Bythistimethepassengerhasgotthegogglesoff，andstandsrevealedasaremarkablygood—lookingwoman。_
　　MRSTARLETON。WellInever!!!
　　BENTLEY。[_inawhisper_]Oh，Isay!
　　JOHNNY。ByGeorge!
　　_AllLORDSUMMERHAYSAlady!to—
　　gether。_
　　HYPATIA。Awoman!
　　TARLETON。[_toPercival_]Younevertoldme——
　　PERCIVAL。Ihadnttheleastidea——
　　_Anembarrassedpause。_
　　PERCIVAL。IassureyouifI’dhadthefaintestnotionthatmypassengerwasaladyIshouldnthaveleftyoutoshiftforyourselfinthatselfishway。
　　LORDSUMMERHAYS。Theladyseemstohaveshiftedforbothveryeffectually，sir。
　　PERCIVAL。Savedmylife。Iadmititmostgratefully。
　　TARLETON。Imustapologize，madam，forhavingofferedyouthecivilitiesappropriatetotheoppositesex。Andyet，whyopposite？
　　Weareallhuman：malesandfemalesofthesamespecies。Whenthedressisthesamethedistinctionvanishes。I’mproudtoreceiveinmyhousealadyofevidentrefinementanddistinction。Allowmetointroducemyself：Tarleton：JohnTarleton（_seeingconjectureinthepassenger’seye_）——yes，yes：Tarleton’sUnderwear。Mywife，MrsTarleton：youllexcusemeforhavinginwhatIhadtakentobeaconfidencebetweenmanandmanalludedtoherastheChickabiddy。MydaughterHypatia，whohasalwayswantedsomeadventuretodropoutofthesky，andisnow，Ihope，satisfiedatlast。LordSummerhays：amanknownwherevertheBritishflagwaves。HissonBentley，engagedtoHypatia。MrJosephPercival，thepromisingsonofthreehighlyintellectualfathers。
　　HYPATIA。_[startled]_Bentley’sfriend？_[Bentleynods]。_
　　TARLETON。_[continuing，tothepassenger]_MayInowasktobeallowedthepleasureofknowingyourname？
　　THEPASSENGER。MynameisLinaSzczepanowska_[pronouncingitSh—Chepanovska]。_
　　PERCIVAL。Sh——Ibegyourpardon？
　　LINA。Szczepanowska。
　　PERCIVAL。_[dubiously]_Thankyou。
　　TARLETON。_[verypolitely]_Wouldyoumindsayingitagain？
　　LINA。Sayfish。
　　TARLETON。Fish。
　　LINA。Saychurch。
　　TARLETON。Church。
　　LINA。Sayfishchurch。
　　TARLETON。_[remonstrating]_Butit’snotgoodsense。
　　LINA。_[inexorable]_Sayfishchurch。
　　TARLETON。Fishchurch。
　　LINA。Again。
　　TARLETON。No，but——_[resigninghimself]_fishchurch。
　　LINA。NowsaySzczepanowska。
　　TARLETON。Szczepanowska。Gotit，byGad。_[Asibilantwhisperingbecomesaudible：theyareallsayingSh—chtothemselves]。_
　　Szczepanowska!NotanEnglishname，isit？
　　LINA。Polish。I’maPole。
　　TARLETON。Ahyes。Interestingnation。Luckypeopletogetthegovernmentoftheircountrytakenofftheirhands。Nothingtodobutcultivatethemselves。SameaswetookGibraltaroffthehandsoftheSpaniards。SavestheSpanishtaxpayer。JollygoodthingforusiftheGermanstookPortsmouth。Sitdown，wontyou？
　　_Thegroupbreaksup。JohnnyandBentleyhurrytothepavilionandfetchthetwowickerchairs。JohnnygiveshistoLina。HypatiaandPercivaltakethechairsattheworktable。LordSummerhaysgivesthechairatthevestibuleendofthewritingtabletoMrsTarleton；andBentleyreplacesitwithawickerchair，whichLordSummerhaystakes。
　　Johnnyremainsstandingbehindtheworktable，Bentleybehindhisfather。_
　　MRSTARLETON。_[toLina]_Havesometeanow，wontyou？
　　LINA。Ineverdrinktea。
　　TARLETON。_[sittingdownattheendofthewritingtablenearestLina]_Badthingtoaeroplaneon，Ishouldimagine。Toojumpy。Beenupmuch？
　　LINA。Notinanaeroplane。Iveparachuted；butthatschild’splay。
　　MRSTARLETON。Butarntyouveryfoolishtorunsuchadreadfulrisk？
　　LINA。Youcantlivewithoutrunningrisks。
　　MRSTARLETON。Oh，whatathingtosay!Didntyouknowyoumighthavebeenkilled？
　　LINA。ThatwaswhyIwentup。
　　HYPATIA。Ofcourse。Cantyouunderstandthefascinationofthething？thenovelty!thedaring!thesenseofsomethinghappening!
　　LINA。Ohno。It’stootameabusinessforthat。Iwentupforfamilyreasons。
　　TARLETON。Eh？What？Familyreasons？
　　MRSTARLETON。Ihopeitwasnttospiteyourmother？
　　PERCIVAL。_[quickly]_Oryourhusband？
　　LINA。I’mnotmarried。AndwhyshouldIwanttospitemymother？
　　HYPATIA。_[asidetoPercival]_Thatwascleverofyou，MrPercival。
　　PERCIVAL。What？
　　HYPATIA。Tofindout。
　　TARLETON。I’minadifficulty。Icantunderstandaladygoingupinanaeroplaneforfamilyreasons。It’srudetobecuriousandaskquestions；butthenit’sinhumantobeindifferent，asifyoudidntcare。
　　LINA。I’lltellyouwithpleasure。Forthelasthundredandfiftyyears，notasingledayhaspassedwithoutsomememberofmyfamilyriskinghislife——orherlife。It’sapointofhonorwithustokeepupthattradition。Usuallyseveralofusdoit；butithappensthatjustatthismomentitisbeingkeptupbyoneofmybrothersonly。
　　EarlythismorningIgotatelegramfromhimtosaythattherehadbeenafire，andthathecoulddonothingfortherestoftheweek。
　　FortunatelyIhadaninvitationfromtheAerialLeaguetoseethisgentlemantrytobreakthepassengerrecord。IappealedtothePresidentoftheLeaguetoletmesavethehonorofmyfamily。Hearrangeditforme。
　　TARLETON。Oh，Imustbedreaming。Thisisstarkravingnonsense。
　　LINA。_[quietly]_Youarequiteawake，sir。
　　JOHNNY。Wecantallbedreamingthesamething，Governor。
　　TARLETON。Ofcoursenot，youduffer；butthenI’mdreamingyouaswellasthelady。
　　MRSTARLETON。Dontbesilly，John。Theladyisonlyjoking，I’msure。_[ToLina]_Isupposeyourluggageisintheaeroplane。
　　PERCIVAL。Luggagewasoutofthequestion。IfIstaytodinnerI’mafraidIcantchangeunlessyoulllendmesomeclothes。
　　MRSTARLETON。Doyoumeanneitherofyou？
　　PERCIVAL。I’mafraidso。
　　MRSTARLETON。Ohwell，nevermind：Hypatiawilllendtheladyagown。
　　LINA。Thankyou：I’mquitecomfortableasIam。Iamnotaccustomedtogowns：theyhampermeandmakemefeelridiculous；soifyoudontmindIshallnotchange。
　　MRSTARLETON。Well，I’mbeginningtothinkI’mdoingabitofdreamingmyself。
　　HYPATIA。_[impatiently]_Oh，it’sallright，mamma。Johnny：lookafterMr。Percival。_[ToLina，rising]_Comewithme。
　　_Linafollowshertotheinnerdoor。Theyallrise。_
　　JOHNNY。_[toPercival]_I’llshewyou。
　　PERCIVAL。Thankyou。
　　_LinagoesoutwithHypatia，andPercivalwithJohnny。_
　　MRSTARLETON。Well，thisisanicethingtohappen!Andlookatthegreenhouse!Itllcostthirtypoundstomendit。Peoplehavenorighttodosuchthings。Andyouinvitedthemtodinnertoo!WhatsortofwomanisthattohaveinourhousewhenyouknowthatallHindheadwillbecallingonustoseethataeroplane？Bunny：comewithmeandhelpmetogetallthepeopleoutofthegrounds：Ideclaretheycamerunningasiftheydsprungupoutoftheearth_[shemakesfortheinnerdoor]。_
　　TARLETON。No：dontyoutrouble，Chickabiddy：I’lltackleem。
　　MRSTARLETON。Indeedyoulldonothingofthekind：youllstayherequietlywithLordSummerhays。Youdinvitethemalltodinner。Come，Bunny。_[Shegoesout，followedbyBentley。LordSummerhayssitsdownagain]。_
　　TARLETON。SingularlybeautifulwomanSummerhays。Whatdoyoumakeofher？Shemustbeaprincess。Whatsthisfamilyofwarriorsandstatesmenthatrisktheirliveseveryday？
　　LORDSUMMERHAYS。Theyareevidentlynotwarriorsandstatesmen，ortheywouldntdothat。
　　TARLETON。Well，then，whothedevilarethey？
　　LORDSUMMERHAYS。IthinkIknow。ThelasttimeIsawthatlady，shedidsomethingIshouldnothavethoughtpossible。
　　TARLETON。Whatwasthat？
　　LORDSUMMERHAYS。Well，shewalkedbackwardsalongatautwirewithoutabalancingpoleandturnedasomersaultinthemiddle。IrememberthathernamewasLina，andthattheothernamewasforeign；thoughI
　　dontrecollectit。
　　TARLETON。Szcz!Youcouldnthaveforgottenthatifyoudheardit。
　　LORDSUMMERHAYS。Ididnthearit：Ionlysawitonaprogram。Butit’sclearshesanacrobat。ItexplainshowshesavedPercival。Anditaccountsforherfamilypride。
　　TARLETON。Anacrobat，eh？Good，good，good!Summerhays：thatbringsherwithinreach。Thatsbetterthanaprincess。IsteeledthisevergreenheartofminewhenIthoughtshewasaprincess。NowI
　　shallletitbetouched。Sheisaccessible。Good。
　　LORDSUMMERHAYS。Ihopeyouarenotserious。Remember：youhaveafamily。Youhaveaposition。Youarenotinyourfirstyouth。
　　TARLETON。Nomatter。
　　TheresmagicinthenightWhentheheartisyoung。
　　Myheartisyoung。Besides，I’mamarriedman，notawidowerlikeyou。Amarriedmancandoanythinghelikesifhiswifedontmind。A
　　widowercantbetoocareful。NotthatIwouldhaveyouthinkmeanunprincipledmanorabadhusband。I’mnot。ButIveasuperabundanceofvitality。ReadPepys’Diary。
　　LORDSUMMERHAYS。Thewomanisyourguest，Tarleton。
　　TARLETON。Well，isshe？AwomanIbringintomyhouseismyguest。
　　Awomanyoubringintomyhouseismyguest。Butawomanwhodropsbangdownoutoftheskyintomygreenhouseandsmasheseveryblessedpaneofglassinitmusttakeherchance。
　　LORDSUMMERHAYS。Still，youknowthatmynamemustnotbeassociatedwithanyscandal。Youllbecareful，wontyou？
　　TARLETON。OhLord，yes。Yes，yes，yes，yes，yes。Iwasonlyjoking，ofcourse。
　　_MrsTarletoncomesbackthroughtheinnerdoor。_
　　MRSTARLETON。WellInever!John：Idontthinkthatyoungwoman’srightinherhead。Doyouknowwhatshesjustaskedfor？
　　TARLETON。Champagne？
　　MRSTARLETON。No。ShewantsaBibleandsixoranges。
　　TARLETON。What？
　　MRSTARLETON。ABibleandsixoranges。
　　TARLETON。Iunderstandtheoranges：shesdoinganorangecureofsomesort。ButwhatonearthdoesshewanttheBiblefor？
　　MRSTARLETON。I’msureIcantimagine。Shecantberightinherhead。
　　LORDSUMMERHAYS。Perhapsshewantstoreadit。
　　MRSTARLETON。Butwhyshouldshe，onaweekday，atallevents。Whatwouldyouadvisemetodo，LordSummerhays？
　　LORDSUMMERHAYS。Well，isthereaBibleinthehouse？
　　TARLETON。Stacksofem。TheresthefamilyBible，andtheDoreBible，andtheparallelrevisedversionBible，andtheDovesPressBible，andJohnny’sBibleandBobby’sBibleandPatsy’sBible，andtheChickabiddy’sBibleandmyBible；andIdaresaytheservantscouldraiseafewmorebetweenthem。Letherhavethelot。
　　MRSTARLETON。DonttalklikethatbeforeLordSummerhays，John。
　　LORDSUMMERHAYS。Itdoesntmatter，MrsTarleton：inJinghiskahnitwasapunishableoffencetoexposeaBibleforsale。Theempirehasnoreligion。
　　_Linacomesin。ShehaslefthercapinHypatia’sroom。Shestopsonthelandingjustinsidethedoor，andspeaksoverthehandrail。_
　　LINA。Oh，MrsTarleton，shallIbemakingmyselfverytroublesomeifIaskforamusic—standinmyroomaswell？
　　TARLETON。Notatall。Youcanhavethepianoifyoulike。Orthegramophone。Havethegramophone。
　　LINA。No，thankyou：nomusic。
　　MRSTARLETON。_[goingtothesteps]_Doyouthinkit’sgoodforyoutoeatsomanyoranges？Arntyouafraidofgettingjaundice？
　　LINA。_[comingdown]_Notintheleast。Butbilliardballswilldoquiteaswell。
　　MRSTARLETON。Butyoucanteatbilliardballs，child!
　　TARLETON。Getem，Chickabiddy。Iunderstand。_[Heimitatesajugglertossingupballs]。_Eh？
　　LINA。_[goingtohim，pasthiswife]_Justso。
　　TARLETON。Billiardballsandcues。Plates，knives，andforks。Twoparaffinlampsandahatstand。
　　LINA。No：thatispopularlow—classbusiness。Inourfamilywetouchnothingbutclassicalwork。Anybodycandolampsandhatstands。
　　_I_candosilverbullets。Thatisreallyhard。_[ShepassesontoLordSummerhays，andlooksgravelydownathimashesitsbythewritingtable]。_
　　MRSTARLETON。Well，I’msureIdontknowwhatyouretalkingabout；
　　andIonlyhopeyouknowyourselves。However，youshallhavewhatyouwant，ofcourse。_[Shegoesupthestepsandleavestheroom]。_
　　LORDSUMMERHAYS。Willyouforgivemycuriosity？WhatistheBiblefor？
　　LINA。Toquietmysoul。
　　LORDSUMMERHAYS_[withasigh]_Ahyes，yes。Itnolongerquietsmine，Iamsorrytosay。
　　LINA。Thatisbecauseyoudonotknowhowtoreadit。Putitupbeforeyouonastand；andopenitatthePsalms。Whenyoucanreadthemandunderstandthem，quitequietlyandhappily，andkeepsixballsintheairallthetime，youareinperfectcondition；andyoullnevermakeamistakethatevening。Ifyoufindyoucantdothat，thengoandprayuntilyoucan。Andbeverycarefulthatevening。
　　LORDSUMMERHAYS。Isthattheusualformoftestinyourprofession？
　　LINA。NothingthatweSzczepanowskisdoisusual，mylord。
　　LORDSUMMERHAYS。Areyouallsowonderful？
　　LINA。Itisourprofessiontobewonderful。
　　LORDSUMMERHAYS。Doyounevercondescendtodoascommonpeopledo？
　　Forinstance，doyounotprayascommonpeoplepray？
　　LINA。Commonpeopledonotpray，mylord：theyonlybeg。
　　LORDSUMMERHAYS。Youneveraskforanything？
　　LINA。No。
　　LORDSUMMERHAYS。Thenwhydoyoupray？
　　LINA。ToremindmyselfthatIhaveasoul。
　　TARLETON。_[walkingabout]_True。Fine。Good。Beautiful。Allthisdamnedmaterialism：whatgoodisittoanybody？Ivegotasoul：
　　donttellmeIhavnt。Cutmeupandyoucantfindit。Cutupasteamengineandyoucantfindthesteam。But，byGeorge，itmakestheenginego。Saywhatyouwill，Summerhays，thedivinesparkisafact。
　　LORDSUMMERHAYS。HaveIdeniedit？
　　TARLETON。Ourwholecivilizationisadenialofit。ReadWaltWhitman。
　　LORDSUMMERHAYS。Ishallgotothebilliardroomandgettheballsforyou。
　　LINA。Thankyou。
　　_LordSummerhaysgoesoutthroughthevestibuledoor。_
　　TARLETON。_[goingtoher]_Listentome。_[Sheturnsquickly]。_
　　Whatyousaidjustnowwasbeautiful。Youtouchchords。Youappealtothepoetryinaman。Youinspirehim。Comenow!Youreawomanoftheworld：youreindependent：youmusthavedrivenlotsofmencrazy。YouknowthesortofmanIam，dontyou？Seethroughmeataglance，eh？
　　LINA。Yes。_[ShesitsdownquietlyinthechairLordSummerhayshasjustleft]。_
　　TARLETON。Good。Well，doyoulikeme？Dontmisunderstandme：I’mperfectlyawarethatyourenotgoingtofallinloveatfirstsightwitharidiculousoldshopkeeper。Icanthelpthatridiculousoldshopkeeper。IhavetocarryhimaboutwithmewhetherIlikeitornot。Ihavetopayforhisclothes，thoughIhatethecutofthem：
　　especiallythewaistcoat。IhavetolookathimintheglasswhileI’mshaving。Iloathehimbecausehesalivinglie。Mysoul’snotlikethat：it’slikeyours。Iwanttomakeafoolofmyself。Aboutyou。Willyouletme？
　　LINA。_[verycalm]_Howmuchwillyoupay？
　　TARLETON。Nothing。ButI’llthrowasmanysovereignsasyoulikeintotheseatoshewyouthatI’minearnest。
　　LINA。Arethoseyourusualterms？
　　TARLETON。No。Inevermadethatbidbefore。
　　LINA。_[producingadaintylittlebookandpreparingtowriteinit]_
　　Whatdidyousayyournamewas？
　　TARLETON。JohnTarleton。ThegreatJohnTarletonofTarleton’sUnderwear。
　　LINA。_[writing]_T—a—r—l—e—t—o—n。Er——？_[Shelooksupathiminquiringly]。_
　　TARLETON。_[promptly]_Fifty—eight。
　　LINA。Thankyou。Ikeepalistofallmyoffers。IliketoknowwhatI’mconsideredworth。
　　TARLETON。Letmelook。
　　LINA。_[offeringthebooktohim]_It’sinPolish。
　　TARLETON。Thatsnogood。Isminethelowestoffer？
　　LINA。No：thehighest。
　　TARLETON。Whatdomostofthemcometo？Diamonds？Motorcars？
　　Furs？VillaatMonteCarlo？
　　LINA。Ohyes：allthat。Andsometimesthedevotionofalifetime。
　　TARLETON。Fancythat!Ayoungmanofferingawomanhisoldageasatemptation!
　　LINA。Bytheway，youdidnotsayhowlong。
　　TARLETON。Untilyougettiredofme。
　　LINA。Oruntilyougettiredofme？
　　TARLETON。Inevergettired。Inevergoonlongenoughforthat。
　　Butwhenitbecomessogrand，soinspiringthatIfeelthateverythingmustbeananti—climaxafterthat，thenIrunaway。
　　LINA。Doessheletyougowithoutastruggle？
　　TARLETON。Yes。Gladtogetridofme。Whenlovetakesamanasittakesme——whenitmakeshimgreat——itfrightensawoman。
　　LINA。Theladyhereisyourwife，isntshe？Dontyoucareforher？
　　TARLETON。Yes。Andmind!shecomesfirstalways。IreserveherdignityevenwhenIsacrificemyown。Youllrespectthatpointofhonor，wontyou？
　　LINA。Onlyapointofhonor？
　　TARLETON。_[impulsively]_No，byGod!apointofaffectionaswell。
　　LINA。_[smiling，pleasedwithhim]_Shakehands，oldpal_[sherisesandoffershimherhandfrankly]。_
　　TARLETON。_[givinghishandratherdolefully]_Thanks。Thatmeansno，doesntit？
　　LINA。Itmeanssomethingthatwilllastlongerthanyes。Ilikeyou。
　　Iadmityoutomyfriendship。Whatapityyouwerenottrainedwhenyouwereyoung!Youdbeyoungstill。
　　TARLETON。Isuppose，toanathletelikeyou，I’mprettyawful，eh？
　　LINA。Shocking。
　　TARLETON。Toomuchcrumb。Wrinkles。Yellowpatchesthatwontcomeoff。Shortwind。Iknow。I’mashamedofmyself。Icoulddonothingonthehighrope。
　　LINA。Ohyes：Icouldputyouinawheelbarrowandrunyoualong，twohundredfeetup。
　　TARLETON。_[shuddering]_Ugh!Well，I’ddoeventhatforyou。ReadTheMasterBuilder。
　　LINA。Haveyoulearnteverythingfrombooks？
　　TARLETON。Well，haveyoulearnteverythingfromtheflyingtrapeze？
　　LINA。Ontheflyingtrapezethereisoftenanotherwoman；andherlifeisinyourhandseverynightandyourlifeinhers。
　　TARLETON。Lina：I’mgoingtomakeafoolofmyself。I’mgoingtocry_[hecrumplesintothenearestchair]。_
　　LINA。Prayinstead：dontcry。Whyshouldyoucry？YourenotthefirstI’vesaidnoto。
　　TARLETON。Ifyouhadsaidyes，shouldIhavebeenthefirstthen？
　　LINA。Whatrighthaveyoutoask？HaveIaskedam_I_thefirst？
　　TARLETON。Youreright：avulgarquestion。Toamanlikeme，everybodyisthefirst。Liferenewsitself。
　　LINA。Theyoungestchildisthesweetest。
　　TARLETON。Dontprobetoodeep，Lina。Ithurts。
　　LINA。Youmustgetoutofthehabitofthinkingthatthesethingsmattersomuch。It’slinendraperish。
　　TARLETON。Yourequiteright。Iveoftensaidso。Allthesame，itdoesmatter；forIwanttocry。_[Heburieshisfaceinhisarmsonthework—tableandsobs]。_
　　LINA。_[goingtohim]_0lala!_[Sheslapshimvigorously，butnotunkindly，ontheshoulder]。_Courage，oldpal，courage!Haveyouagymnasiumhere？
　　TARLETON。Theresatrapezeandbarsandthingsinthebilliardroom。
　　LINA。Come。Youneedafewexercises。I’llteachyouhowtostopcrying。_[Shetakeshisarmandleadshimoffintothevestibule]。_
　　_Ayoungman，cheaplydressedandstrangeinmanner，appearsinthegarden；stealstothepaviliondoor；andlooksin。Seeingthatthereisnobody，heenterscautiouslyuntilhehascomefarenoughtoseeintothehatstandcorner。Hedrawsarevolver，andexaminesit，apparentlytomakesurethatitisloaded。ThenhisattentioniscaughtbytheTurkishbath。Helooksdownthelunette，andopensthepanels。_
　　HYPATIA。_[callinginthegarden]_MrPercival!MrPercival!Whereareyou？
　　_Theyoungmanmakesforthedoor，butseesPercivalcoming。HeturnsandboltsintotheTurkishbath，whichheclosesuponhimselfjustintimetoescapebeingcaughtbyPercival，whorunsinthroughthepavilion，bareheaded。Healso，itappears，isinsearchofahiding—place；forhestopsandturnsbetweenthetwotablestotakeasurveyoftheroom；thenrunsintothecornerbetweentheendofthesideboardandthewall。Hypatia，excited，mischievous，hereyesglowing，runsin，preciselyonhistrail；turnsatthesamespot；anddiscovershimjustashemakesadashforthepaviliondoor。Shefliesbackandinterceptshim。_
　　HYPATIA。Aha!arntyougladIvecaughtyou？
　　PERCIVAL。_[illhumoredlyturningawayfromherandcomingtowardsthewritingtable]_NoI’mnot。Confoundit，whatsortofgirlareyou？
　　Whatsortofhouseisthis？MustIthrowallgoodmannerstothewinds？
　　HYPATIA。_[followinghim]_Do，do，do，do，do。Thisisthehouseofarespectableshopkeeper，enormouslyrich。Thisistherespectableshopkeeper’sdaughter，tiredofgoodmanners。_[Slippingherlefthandintohisright]_Come，handsomeyoungman，andplaywiththerespectableshopkeeper’sdaughter。
　　PERCIVAL。_[withdrawingquicklyfromhertouch]_No，no：dontyouknowyoumustntgoonlikethiswithaperfectstranger？
　　HYPATIA。Droppeddownfromthesky。Dontyouknowthatyoumustalwaysgoonlikethiswhenyougetthechance？Youmustcometothetopofthehillandchasemethroughthebracken。Youmaykissmeifyoucatchme。
　　PERCIVAL。Ishalldonothingofthesort。
　　HYPATIA。Yesyouwill：youcanthelpyourself。Comealong。_[Sheseizeshissleeve]。_Fool，fool：comealong。Dontyouwantto？
　　PERCIVAL。No：certainlynot。IshouldneverbeforgivenifIdidit。
　　HYPATIA。Youllneverforgiveyourselfifyoudont。
　　PERCIVAL。Nonsense。YoureengagedtoBen。Ben’smyfriend。Whatdoyoutakemefor？
　　HYPATIA。Ben’sold。Benwasbornold。Theyrealloldhere，exceptyouandmeandtheman—womanorwoman—manorwhateveryoucallherthatcamewithyou。Theyneverdoanything：theyonlydiscusswhetherwhatotherpeopledoisright。Comeandgivethemsomethingtodiscuss。
　　PERCIVAL。Iwilldonothingincorrect。
　　HYPATIA。Oh，dontbeafraid，littleboy：youllgetnothingbutakiss；andI’llfightlikethedeviltokeepyoufromgettingthat。
　　Butwemustplayonthehillandracethroughtheheather。
　　PERCIVAL。Why？
　　HYPATIA。Becausewewantto，handsomeyoungman。
　　PERCIVAL。Butifeverybodywentoninthisway——
　　HYPATIA。Howhappy!ohhowhappytheworldwouldbe!
　　PERCIVAL。Buttheconsequencesmaybeserious。
　　HYPATIA。Nothingisworthdoingunlesstheconsequencesmaybeserious。Myfathersaysso；andI’mmyfather’sdaughter。
　　PERCIVAL。I’mthesonofthreefathers。Imistrustthesewildimpulses。
　　HYPATIA。Takecare。Yourelettingthemomentslip。Ifeelthefirstchillofthewaveofprudence。Saveme。
　　PERCIVAL。Really，MissTarleton_[shestrikeshimacrosstheface]_
　　——Damnyou!_[Recoveringhimself，horrifiedathislapse]_Ibegyourpardon；butsincewevebothforgottenourselves，youllpleaseallowmetoleavethehouse。_[Heturnstowardstheinnerdoor，havinglefthiscapinthebedroom]。_
　　HYPATIA。_[standinginhisway]_Areyouashamedofhavingsaid"Damnyou"tome？
　　PERCIVAL。Ihadnorighttosayit。I’mverymuchashamedofit。I
　　havealreadybeggedyourpardon。
　　HYPATIA。Andyourenotashamedofhavingsaid"Really，MissTarleton。"
　　PERCIVAL。WhyshouldI？
　　HYPATIA。0man，man!mean，stupid，cowardly，selfishmasculinemaleman!Yououghttohavebeenagoverness。Iwasexpelledfromschoolforsayingthattheverynextpersonthatsaid"Really，MissTarleton，"tome，Iwouldstrikeheracrosstheface。Youwerethenext。
　　PERCIVAL。Ihadnointentionofbeingoffensive。Surelythereisnothingthatcanwoundanyladyin——_[Hehesitates，notquiteconvinced]。_Atleast——er——Ireallydidntmeantobedisagreeable。
　　HYPATIA。Liar。
　　PERCIVAL。Ofcourseifyouregoingtoinsultme，Iamquitehelpless。
　　Youreawoman：youcansaywhatyoulike。
　　HYPATIA。Andyoucanonlysaywhatyoudare。Poorwretch：itisntmuch。_[Hebiteshislip，andsitsdown，verymuchannoyed]。_
　　Really，MrPercival!Yousitdowninthepresenceofaladyandleaveherstanding。_[Heriseshastily]。_Ha，ha!Really，MrPercival!
　　Ohreally，really，really，really，really，MrPercival!Howdoyoulikeit？WouldntyouratherIdamnedyou？
　　PERCIVAL。MissTarleton——
　　HYPATIA。_[caressingly]_Hypatia，Joey。Patsy，ifyoulike。
　　PERCIVAL。Lookhere：thisisnogood。Youwanttodowhatyoulike？
　　HYPATIA。Dontyou？
　　PERCIVAL。No。Ivebeentoowellbroughtup。Ivearguedallthroughthisthing；andItellyouI’mnotpreparedtocastoffthesocialbond。It’slikeacorset：it’sasupporttothefigureevenifitdoessqueezeanddeformitabit。Iwanttobefree。
　　HYPATIA。Well，I’mtemptingyoutobefree。
　　PERCIVAL。Notatall。Freedom，mygoodgirl，meansbeingabletocountonhowotherpeoplewillbehave。Ifeverymanwhodislikesmeistothrowahandfulofmudinmyface，andeverywomanwholikesmeistobehavelikePotiphar’swife，thenIshallbeaslave：theslaveofuncertainty：theslaveoffear：theworstofallslaveries。Howwouldyoulikeitifeverylaboreryoumetintheroadweretomakelovetoyou？No。Givemetheblessedprotectionofagoodstiffconventionalityamongthoroughlywell—broughtupladiesandgentlemen。
　　HYPATIA。Anothertalker!Menlikeconventionsbecausemenmadethem。
　　Ididntmakethem：Idontlikethem：Iwontkeepthem。Now，whatwillyoudo？
　　PERCIVAL。Bolt。_[Herunsoutthroughthepavilion]。_
　　HYPATIA。I’llcatchyou。_[Shedashesoffinpursuit]。_
　　_DuringthisconversationtheheadofthescandalizedmanintheTurkishbathhasrepeatedlyrisenfromthelunette，withastrongexpressionofmoralshock。Itvanishesabruptlyasthetwoturntowardsitintheirflight。AtthesamemomentTarletoncomesbackthroughthevestibuledoor，exhaustedbysevereandunaccustomedexercise。_
　　TARLETON。_[lookingaftertheflyingfigureswithamazement]_Hallo，Patsy：whatsup？Anotheraeroplane？_[Theyarefartoopreoccupiedtohearhim；andheisleftstaringafterthemastheyrushawaythroughthegarden。Hegoestothepaviliondoorandlooksup；buttheheavensareempty。Hisexhaustiondisableshimfromfurtherinquiry。Hedabshisbrowwithhishandkerchief，andwalksstifflytothenearestconvenientsupport，whichhappenstobetheTurkishbath。
　　Hepropshimselfuponitwithhiselbow，andcovershiseyeswithhishandforamoment。Afterafewsighingbreaths，hefeelsalittlebetter，anduncovershiseyes。Theman’sheadrisesfromthelunetteafewinchesfromhisnose。Herecoilsfromthebathwithaviolentstart]。_OhLord!Mybrain’sgone。_[Callingpiteously]_
　　Chickabiddy!_[Hestaggersdowntothewritingtable]。_
　　THEMAN。_[comingoutofthebath，pistolinhand]_Anothersound；
　　andyoureadeadman。
　　TARLETON。_[braced]_AmI？Well，yourealiveone：thatsonecomfort。Ithoughtyouwereaghost。_[Hesitsdown，quiteundisturbedbythepistol]_Whoareyou；andwhatthedevilwereyoudoinginmynewTurkishbath？
　　THEMAN。_[withtragicintensity]_IamthesonofLucindaTitmus。
　　TARLETON。_[thenameconveyingnothingtohim]_Indeed？Andhowisshe？Quitewell，Ihope，eh？
　　THEMAN。Sheisdead。Dead，myGod!andyourealive。
　　TARLETON。_[unimpressedbythetragedy，butsympathetic]_Oh!Lostyourmother？Thatssad。I’msorry。Butwecantallhavethelucktosurviveourmothers，andbenursedoutoftheworldbythehandsthatnursedusintoit。
　　THEMAN。Muchyoucare，damnyou!
　　TARLETON。Oh，dontcutuprough。Faceitlikeaman。YouseeI
　　didntknowyourmother；butIvenodoubtshewasanexcellentwoman。
　　THEMAN。Notknowher!Doyoudaretostandtherebyheropengraveanddenythatyouknewher？
　　TARLETON。_[tryingtorecollect]_Whatdidyousayhernamewas？
　　THEMAN。LucindaTitmus。
　　TARLETON。Well，IoughttorememberarumnamelikethatifIeverheardit。ButIdont。Haveyouaphotographoranything？
　　THEMAN。Forgotteneventhenameofyourvictim!
　　TARLETON。Oh!shewasmyvictim，wasshe？
　　THEMAN。Shewas。Andyoushallseeherfaceagainbeforeyoudie，deadassheis。Ihaveaphotograph。
　　TARLETON。Good。
　　THEMAN。Ivetwophotographs。
　　TARLETON。Stillbetter。Treasurethemother’spictures。Goodboy!
　　THEMAN。Oneofthemasyouknewher。Theotherasshebecamewhenyouflungheraside，andshewitheredintoanoldwoman。
　　TARLETON。She’dhavedonethatanyhow，mylad。Weallgrowold。
　　Lookatme!_[Seeingthatthemanisembarrassedbyhispistolinfumblingforthephotographswithhislefthandinhisbreastpocket]_
　　Letmeholdthegunforyou。
　　THEMAN。_[retreatingtotheworktable]_Standback。Doyoutakemeforafool？
　　TARLETON。Well，yourealittleupset，naturally。Itdoesyoucredit。
　　THEMAN。Lookhere，uponthispictureandonthis。_[Heholdsoutthetwophotographslikeahandatcards，andpointstothemwiththepistol]。_
　　TARLETON。Good。ReadShakespear：hehasawordforeveryoccasion。
　　_[Hetakesthephotographs，oneineachhand，andlooksfromonetotheother，pleasedandinterested，butwithoutanysignofrecognition]_Whataprettygirl!Verypretty。IcanimaginemyselffallinginlovewithherwhenIwasyourage。Iwasntabad—lookingyoungfellowmyselfinthosedays。_[Lookingattheother]_Curiousthatweshouldbothhavegonethesameway。
　　THEMAN。Youandshethesameway!Whatdoyoumean？
　　TARLETON。Bothgotstout，Imean。
　　THEMAN。Wouldyouhavehadherdenyherselffood？
　　TARLETON。No：itwouldnthavebeenanyuse。It’sconstitutional。
　　Nomatterhowlittleyoueatyouputonfleshifyouremadethatway。
　　_[Heresumeshisstudyoftheearlierphotograph]。_
　　THEMAN。Isthatallthefeelingthatrisesinyouatthesightofthefaceyouonceknewsowell？
　　TARLETON。_[toomuchabsorbedintheportraittoheedhim]_FunnythatIcantremember!Letthisbealessontoyou，youngman。I
　　couldgointocourttomorrowandswearIneversawthatfacebeforeinmylifeifitwasntforthatbrooch_[pointingtothephotograph]。_
　　Haveyougotthatbrooch，bytheway？_[Themanagainresortstohisbreastpocket]。_Youseemtocarrythewholefamilypropertyinthatpocket。
　　THEMAN。_[producingabrooch]_Hereitistoprovemybonafides。
　　TARLETON。_[pensivelyputtingthephotographsonthetableandtakingthebrooch]_IboughtthatbroochinCheapsidefromamanwithayellowwigandacastinhislefteye。Iveneverseteyesonhimfromthatdaytothis。AndyetIrememberthatman；andIcantrememberyourmother。
　　THEMAN。Monster!Withoutconscience!withoutevenmemory!Youlefthertohershame——
　　TARLETON。_[throwingthebroochonthetableandrisingpepperily]_
　　Come，come，youngman!noneofthat。Respecttheromanceofyourmother’syouth。Dontyoustartthrowingstonesather。Idontrecallherfeaturesjustatthismoment；butIvenodoubtshewaskindtomeandwewerehappytogether。Ifyouhaveawordtosayagainsther，takeyourselfoutofmyhouseandsayitelsewhere。
　　THEMAN。Whatsortofajokerareyou？Areyoutryingtoputmeinthewrong，whenyouhavetoanswertomeforacrimethatwouldmakeeveryhonestmanspitatyouasyoupassedinthestreetifIweretomakeitknown？
　　TARLETON。Youreadagooddeal，dontyou？
　　THEMAN。WhatifIdo？Whathasthattodowithyourinfamyandmymother’sdoom？
　　TARLETON。There，yousee!Doom!Thatsnotgoodsense；butit’sliterature。NowithappensthatI’matremendousreader：alwayswas。
　　WhenIwasyourageIreadbooksofthatsortbythebushel：theDoomsort，youknow。It’sodd，isntit，thatyouandIshouldbelikeoneanotherinthatrespect？Canyouaccountforitinanyway？
　　THEMAN。No。Whatareyoudrivingat？
　　TARLETON。Well，doyouknowwhoyourfatherwas？
　　THEMAN。Iseewhatyoumeannow。Youdaresetuptobemyfather。
　　ThankheavenIvenotadropofyourvilebloodinmyveins。
　　TARLETON。_[sittingdownagainwithashrug]_Well，ifyouwontbecivil，theresnopleasureintalkingtoyou，isthere？Whatdoyouwant？Money？
　　THEMAN。Howdareyouinsultme？
　　TARLETON。Well，whatdoyouwant？
　　THEMAN。Justice。
　　TARLETON。Yourequitesurethatsall？
　　THEMAN。It’senoughforme。
　　TARLETON。Amodestsortofdemand，isntit？Nobodyeverhaditsincetheworldbegan，fortunatelyforthemselves；butyoumusthaveit，mustyou？Well，youvecometothewrongshopforit：youllgetnojusticehere：wedontkeepit。Humannatureiswhatwestock。
　　THEMAN。Humannature!Debauchery!gluttony!selfishness!robberyofthepoor!Isthatwhatyoucallhumannature？
　　TARLETON。No：thatswhatyoucallit。Come，mylad!Whatsthematterwithyou？Youdontlookstarved；andyouveadecentsuitofclothes。
　　THEMAN。Forty—twoshillings。
　　TARLETON。Theycandoyouaverydecentsuitforforty—twoshillings。
　　Haveyoupaidforit？
　　THEMAN。Doyoutakemeforathief？AnddoyousupposeIcangetcreditlikeyou？
　　TARLETON。Thenyouwereabletolayyourhandonforty—twoshillings。
　　Judgingfromyourconversationalstyle，Ishouldthinkyoumustspendatleastashillingaweekonromanticliterature。
　　THEMAN。WherewouldIgetashillingaweektospendonbookswhenI
　　canhardlykeepmyselfdecent？IgetbooksattheFreeLibrary。
　　TARLETON_[springingtohisfeet]_What!!!
　　THEMAN。_[recoilingbeforehisvehemence]_TheFreeLibrary。
　　Theresnoharminthat。
　　TARLETON。Ingrate!Isupplyyouwithfreebooks；andtheuseyoumakeofthemistopersuadeyourselfthatit’safinethingtoshootme。_[Hethrowshimselfdoggedlybackintohischair]。_I’llnevergiveanotherpennytoaFreeLibrary。
　　THEMAN。Youllnevergiveanotherpennytoanything。Thisistheend：foryouandme。
　　TARLETON。Pooh!Come，come，man!talkbusiness。Whatswrong？Areyououtofemployment？
　　THEMAN。No。ThisismySaturdayafternoon。DontflatteryourselfthatI’maloaferoracriminal。I’macashier；andIdefyyoutosaythatmycashhaseverbeenafarthingwrong。Ivearighttocallyoutoaccountbecausemyhandsareclean。
　　TARLETON。Well，callaway。WhathaveItoaccountfor？Hadyouahardtimewithyourmother？Whydidntsheaskmeformoney？
　　THEMAN。She’dhavediedfirst。Besides，whowantedyourmoney？Doyousupposewelivedinthegutter？Myfathermaynthavebeeninaslargeawayasyou；buthewasbetterconnected；andhisshopwasasrespectableasyours。
　　TARLETON。Isupposeyourmotherbroughthimalittlecapital。
　　THEMAN。Idontknow。Whatsthatgottodowithyou？
　　TARLETON。Well，yousaysheandIknewoneanotherandparted。Shemusthavehadsomethingoffmethen，youknow。Onedoesntgetoutofthesethingsfornothing。Hangit，youngman：doyousupposeIvenoheart？Ofcourseshehadherdue；andshefoundahusbandwithit，andsethimupinbusinesswithit，andbroughtyouuprespectably；sowhatthedevilhaveyoutocomplainof？
　　THEMAN。Arewomentoberuinedwithimpunity？
　　TARLETON。IhavntruinedanywomanthatI’mawareof。Ivebeenthemakingofyouandyourmother。
　　THEMAN。Oh，I’mafooltolistentoyouandarguewithyou。Icameheretokillyouandthenkillmyself。
　　TARLETON。Beginwithyourself，ifyoudontmind。IveagooddealofbusinesstodostillbeforeIdie。Havntyou？
　　THEMAN。No。Thatsjustit：Ivenobusinesstodo。Doyouknowwhatmylifeis？Ispendmydaysfromninetosix——ninehoursofdaylightandfreshair——inastuffylittledencountinganotherman’smoney。Iveanintellect：amindandabrainandasoul；andtheusehemakesofthemistofixthemonhistuppencesandhiseighteenpencesandhistwopoundseventeenandtenpencesandseehowmuchtheycometoattheendofthedayandtakecarethatnoonestealsthem。Ienterandenter，andaddandadd，andtakemoneyandgivechange，andfillchequesandstampreceipts；andnotapennyofthatmoneyismyown：notoneofthosetransactionshasthesmallestinterestformeoranyoneelseintheworldbuthim；andevenhecouldntstanditifhehadtodoitallhimself。AndI’menvied：
　　aye，enviedforthevarietyandlivelinessofmyjob，bythepoordevilofabookkeeperthathastocopyallmyentriesoveragain。
　　Fiftythousandentriesayearthatpoorwretchmakes；andnottenoutofthefiftythousandeverhastobereferredtoagain；andwhenallthefiguresarecountedupandthebalancesheetmadeout，thebossisntapennythericherthanhe’dbeifbookkeepinghadneverbeeninvented。Ofallthedamnablewasteofhumanlifethateverwasinvented，clerkingistheveryworst。
　　TARLETON。Whynotjointheterritorials？
　　THEMAN。BecauseIshouldntbelet。Hehasnteventhesensetoseethatitwouldpayhimtogetsomecheapsoldieringoutofme。Howcanamantiedtoadeskfromninetosixbeanything——beevenaman，letaloneasoldier？ButI’llteachhimandyoualesson。Ivehadenoughoflivingadog’slifeanddespisingmyselfforit。Ivehadenoughofbeingtalkeddowntobyhogslikeyou，andwearingmylifeoutforasalarythatwouldutkeepyouincigars。Youllneverbelievethataclerk’samanuntiloneofusmakesanexampleofoneofyou。
　　TARLETON。Despotismtemperedbyassassination，eh？
　　THEMAN。Yes。ThatswhattheydoinRussia。Well，abusinessofficeisRussiaasfarastheclerksareconcerned。Sodontyoutakeitsocoolly。YouthinkI’mnotgoingtodoit；butIam。
　　TARLETON。_[risingandfacinghim]_Come，now，asmantoman!It’snotmyfaultthatyourepoorerthanIam；andit’snotyourfaultthatI’mricherthanyou。Andifyoucouldundoallthatpassedbetweenmeandyourmother，youwouldntundoit；andneitherwouldshe。Butyouresickofyourslavery；andyouwanttobetheheroofaromanceandtogetintothepapers。Eh？Asonrevengeshismother’sshame。
　　Villainwelteringinhisgore。Mother：lookdownfromheavenandreceiveyourunhappyson’slastsigh。
　　THEMAN。Oh，rot!doyouthinkIreadnovelettes？AnddoyousupposeIbelievesuchsuperstitionsasheaven？IgotochurchbecausethebosstoldmeI’dgetthesackifIdidnt。FreeEngland!Ha!_[Linaappearsatthepaviliondoor，andcomesswiftlyandnoiselesslyforwardonseeingthemanwithapistolinhishand]。_
　　TARLETON。Youreafraidofgettingthesack；butyourenotafraidtoshootyourself。
　　THEMAN。Damnyou!youretryingtokeepmetalkinguntilsomebodycomes。_[Heraisesthepistoldesperately，butnotveryresolutely]。_
　　LINA。_[athisrightelbow]_Somebodyhascome。
　　THEMAN_[turningonher]_Standoff。I’llshootyouifyoulayahandonme。Iwill，byGod。
　　LINA。Youcantcovermewiththatpistol。Try。
　　_Hetries，presentingthepistolatherface。Shemovesroundhimintheoppositedirectiontothehandsofaclockwithalightdancingstep。Hefindsitimpossibletocoverherwiththepistol：sheisalwaystoofartohisleft。Tarleton，behindhim，gripshiswristanddragshisarmstraightup，sothatthepistolpointstotheceiling。
　　Ashetriestoturnonhisassailant，Linagripshisotherwrist。_
　　LINA。Pleasestop。Icantbeartotwistanyone’swrist；butImustifyoudontletthepistolgo。
　　THEMAN。_[lettingTarletontakeitfromhim]_Allright：I’mdone。
　　Couldntevendothatjobdecently。Thatsaclerkallover。Verywell：sendforyourdamnedpoliceandmakeanendofit。I’maccustomedtoprisonfromninetosix：IdaresayIcanstanditfromsixtonineaswell。
　　TARLETON。Dontswear。Thatsalady。_[Hethrowsthepistolonthewritingtable]。_
　　THEMAN。_[lookingatLinainamazement]_Beatenbyafemale!Itneededonlythis。_[Hecollapsesinthechairneartheworktable，andhideshisface。Theycannothelppityinghim]。_
　　LINA。Oldpal：dontcallthepolice。Lendhimabicycleandlethimgetaway。
　　THEMAN。Icantrideabicycle。Inevercouldaffordone。I’mnoteventhatmuchgood。
　　TARLETON。IfIgaveyouahundredpoundnotenowtogoandhaveagoodspreewith，Iwonderwouldyouknowhowtosetaboutit。Doyouevertakeaholiday？
　　THEMAN。Take!IgotfourdayslastAugust。
　　TARLETON。Whatdidyoudo？
　　THEMAN。IdidacheaptriptoFolkestone。Ispentsevenpenceondroppingpenniesintosillyautomaticmachinesandpeepshowsofrowdygirlshavingajollytime。Ispentapennyontheliftandfourpenceonrefreshments。Thatcleanedmeout。TherestofthetimeIwassomiserablethatIwasgladtogetbacktotheoffice。Nowyouknow。
　　LINA。Cometothegymnasium：I’llteachyouhowtomakeamanofyourself。_[Themanisabouttoriseirresolutely，fromthemerehabitofdoingwhatheistold，whenTarletonstopshim]。_
　　TARLETON。Youngman：dont。Youvetriedtoshootme；butI’mnotvindictive。Idrawthelineatputtingamanontherack。Ifyouwanteveryjointinyourbodystretcheduntilit’sanagonytolive——untilyouhaveanunnaturalfeelingthatallyourmusclesaresingingandlaughingwithpain——thengotothegymnasiumwiththatlady。Butyoullbemorecomfortableinjail。
　　LINA。_[greatlyamused]_Wasthatwhyyouwentaway，oldpal？Wasthatthetelegramyousaidyouhadforgottentosend？
　　_MrsTarletoncomesinhastilythroughtheinnerdoor。_
　　MRSTARLETON。_[onthesteps]_Isanythingthematter，John？Nursesayssheheardyoucallingmeaquarterofanhourago；andthatyourvoicesoundedasifyouwereill。_[ShecomesbetweenTarletonandtheman。]_Isanythingthematter？
　　TARLETON。Thisisthesonofanoldfriendofmine。Mr——er——MrGunner。_[Totheman，whorisesawkwardly]。_Mywife。
　　MRSTARLETON。Goodeveningtoyou。
　　GUNNER。Er——_[Heistoonervoustospeak，andmakesashamblingbow]。_
　　_Bentleylooksinatthepaviliondoor，verypeevish，andtoopreoccupiedwithhisownaffairstopayanyattentiontothoseofthecompany。_
　　BENTLEY。Isay：hasanybodyseenHypatia？Shepromisedtocomeoutwithme；andIcantfindheranywhere。AndwheresJoey？
　　GUNNER。_[suddenlybreakingoutaggressively，beingincapableofanymiddlewaybetweensubmissivenessandviolence]__I_cantellyouwhereHypatiais。IcantellyouwhereJoeyis。AndIsayit’sascandalandaninfamy。Ifpeopleonlyknewwhatgoesoninthisso—calledrespectablehouseitwouldbeputastopto。Thesearethemoralsofourpiouscapitalistclass!Thisisyourrottenbourgeoisie!This!——
　　MRSTARLETON。Dontyoudareusesuchlanguageincompany。Iwontallowit。
　　TARLETON。Allright，Chickabiddy：it’snotbadlanguage：it’sonlySocialism。
　　MRSTARLETON。Well，IwonthaveanySocialisminmyhouse。
　　TARLETON。_[toGunner]_YouhearwhatMrsTarletonsays。Well，inthishouseeverybodydoeswhatshesaysorouttheygo。
　　GUNNER。DoyousupposeIwanttostay？DoyouthinkIwouldbreathethispollutedatmosphereamomentlongerthanIcouldhelp？
　　BENTLEY。_[runningforwardbetweenLinaandGunner]_ButwhatdidyoumeanbywhatyousaidaboutMissTarletonandMrPercival，youbeastlyrotter，you？
　　GUNNER。_[toTarleton]_Oh!isHypatiayourdaughter？AndJoeyisMisterPercival，ishe？Oneofyourset，Isuppose。Oneofthesmartset!Oneofthebridge—playing，eighty—horse—power，week—enderset!
　　OneofthejohnniesIslavefor!Well，Joeyhasmoredecencythanyourdaughter，anyhow。Thewomenaretheworst。IneverbelievedittilIsawitwithmyowneyes。Well，itwontlastforever。Thewritingisonthewall。Romefell。Babylonfell。Hindhead’sturnwillcome。
　　MRSTARLETON。_[naivelylookingatthewallforthewriting]_
　　Whateverareyoutalkingabout，youngman？
　　GUNNER。IknowwhatI’mtalkingabout。IwentintothatTurkishbathaboy：Icameoutaman。
　　MRSTARLETON。Goodgracious!hesmad。_[ToLina]_DidJohnmakehimtakeaTurkishbath？
　　LINA。No。HedoesntneedTurkishbaths：heneedstoputonalittleflesh。Idontunderstandwhatit’sallabout。IfoundhimtryingtoshootMrTarleton。
　　MRSTARLETON。_[withascream]_Oh!andJohnencouraginghim，I’llbebound!Bunny：yougoforthepolice。_[ToGunner]_I’llteachyoutocomeintomyhouseandshootmyhusband。
　　GUNNER。Teachaway。Ineveraskedtobeletoff。I’mashamedtobefreeinsteadoftakingmypartwiththerest。Women——beautifulwomenofnoblebirth——aregoingtoprisonfortheiropinions。GirlstudentsinRussiagotothegallows；letthemselvesbecutinpieceswiththeknout，ordriventhroughthefrozensnowsofSiberia，soonerthanstandlookingontamelyattheworldbeingmadeahellforthetoilingmillions。Ifyouwerenotallskunksandcowardsyoudbesufferingwiththeminsteadofbatteninghereontheplunderofthepoor。
　　MRSTARLETON。_[muchvexed]_Oh，didyoueverhearsuchsillynonsense？Bunny：goandtellthegardenertosendoveroneofhismentoGrayshottforthepolice。
　　GUNNER。I’llgowithhim。Iintendtogivemyselfup。I’mgoingtoexposewhatIveseenhere，nomatterwhattheconsequencesmaybetomymiserableself。
　　TARLETON。Stop。Youstaywhereyouare，Ben。Chickabiddy：youveneverhadthepolicein。Ifyouhad，youdnotbeinahurrytohavetheminagain。Now，youngman：cutthecackle；andtellus，asshortasyoucan，whatdidyousee？
　　GUNNER。Icanttellyouinthepresenceofladies。
　　MRSTARLETON。Oh，youaretiresome。Asifitmatteredtoanyonewhatyousaw。Me!Amarriedwomanthatmightbeyourmother。_[ToLina]_
　　AndI’msureyourenotparticular，ifyoullexcusemysayingso。
　　TARLETON。Outwithit。Whatdidyousee？
　　GUNNER。Isawyourdaughterwithmyowneyes——ohwell，nevermindwhatIsaw。