ACTI
　　OntheheightsoverlookingtheharborofMogador，aseaportonthewestcoastofMorocco，themissionary，inthecoolnessofthelateafternoon，isfollowingthepreceptofVoltairebycultivatinghisgarden。HeisanelderlyScotchman，spirituallyalittleweatherbeaten，ashavingtonavigatehiscreedinstrangewaterscrowdedwithothercraftbutstillaconvincedsonoftheFreeChurchandtheNorthAfricanMission，withafaithfulbrowneye，andapeacefulsoul。Physicallyawirysmall—knitman，welltanned，cleanshaven，withdelicateresolutefeaturesandatwinkleofmildhumor。Hewearsthesunhelmetandpagri，theneutral—tintedspectacles，andthewhitecanvasSpanishsandshoesofthemodernScotchmissionary：butinsteadofacheaptourist’ssuitfromGlasgow，agreyflannelshirtwithwhitecollar，agreensailorknottiewithacheappininit，hewearsasuitofcleanwhitelinen，acceptableincolor，ifnotincut，totheMoorishmind。
　　TheviewfromthegardenincludesmuchAtlanticOceanandalongstretchofsandycoasttothesouth，sweptbythenortheasttradewind，andscantilynourishingafewstuntedpeppertrees，mangypalms，andtamarisks。Theprospectends，asfarasthelandisconcerned，inlittlehillsthatcomenearlytothesea：
　　rudiments，these，oftheAtlasMountains。Themissionary，havinghaddailyopportunitiesoflookingatthisseascapeforthirtyyearsorso，paysnoheedtoit，beingabsorbedintrimmingahugeredgeraniumbush，toEnglisheyesunnaturallybig，which，withadustysmilaxortwo，isthesoleproductofhispetflower—bed。HeissittingtohisworkonaMoorishstool。Inthemiddleofthegardenthereisapleasantseatintheshadeofatamarisktree。Thehouseisinthesouthwestcornerofthegarden，andthegeraniumbushinthenortheastcorner。
　　Atthegarden—doorofthehousethereappearspresentlyamanwhoisclearlynobarbarian，beinginfactalessagreeableproductpeculiartomoderncommercialcivilization。Hisframeandflesharethoseofanill—nourishedladofseventeen；buthisageisinscrutable：onlytheabsenceofanysignofgreyinhismudcoloredhairsuggeststhatheisatalleventsprobablyunderforty，withoutprejudicetothepossibilityofhisbeingundertwenty。ALondonerwouldrecognizehimatonceasanextremebuthardyspecimenoftheabortionproducedbynatureinacityslum。
　　Hisutterance，affectedlypumpedandhearty，andnaturallyvulgarandnasal，isreadyandfluent：nature，aBoardSchooleducation，andsomekerbstonepracticehavingmadehimabitofanorator。
　　Hisdialect，apartfromitsbasenasaldelivery，isnotunlikethatofsmartLondonsocietyinitstendencytoreplacediphthongsbyvowels（sometimesratherprettily）andtoshuffleallthetraditionalvowelpronunciations。Hepronouncesowasah，andiasaw，usingtheordinaryowforo，ifora，aforu，andefora，withthisreservation，thatwhenanyvowelisfollowedbyanrhesignifiesitspresence，notbypronouncingther，whichheneverdoesunderthesecircumstances，butbyprolongingandmodifyinqthevowel，sometimeseventotheextremedegreeofpronouncingitproperly。Astohisyolforl（acompendiousdeliveryoftheprovincialeh—al），andothermetropolitanrefinements，amazingtoallbutcockneys，theycannotbeindicated，saveintheaboveimperfectmanner，withouttheaidofaphoneticalphabet。Heisdressedinsomebodyelse’sverysecondbestasacoast—guardsman，andgiveshimselftheairsofastagetarwithsufficientsuccesstopassasapossiblefishporterofbadcharacterincasualemploymentduringbusytimesatBillingsgate。Hismannershowsanearnestdispositiontoingratiatehimselfwiththemissionary，probablyforsomedishonestpurpose。
　　THEMAN。Awtenoon，Mr。Renkin。（Themissionarysitsupquickly，andturns，resigninghimselfdutifullytotheinterruption。）Yrhonor’seolth。
　　RANKIN（reservedly）。Goodafternoon，Mr。Drinkwotter。
　　DRINKWATER。You’renotbestpleasedtobehinterruptedinyrbitogawdninbowthelawkome，gavner。
　　RANKIN。Amissionaryknowsnothingofleksofthatsoart，orofdislekseither，Mr。Drinkwotter。WhatcanIdoforye？
　　DRINKWATER（heartily）。Nathink，gavner。Awvebrortnoosferyer。
　　RANKIN。Well，sityedoon。
　　DRINKWATER。Awthenkyrhonor。（Hesitsdownontheseatunderthetreeandcomposeshimselfforconversation。）HeverearoJadgeEllam？
　　RANKIN。SirHowrrdHallam？
　　DRINKWATER。Thet’sim—enginestjadgeinHingland!——awlusgivestheketwenit’srobbrywithvoylence，blessisawt。Awsynathinkaginim：awmallferlormawseolf，AWem。
　　RANKIN。Well？
　　DRINKWATER。Heverearofissist—in—lor：LidySislyWinefleet？
　　RANKIN。DoyemeanthecelebratedLeddy——thetraveller？
　　DRINKWATER。Yuss：shouldthinkawdoo。WalkedacrostHarfricarwithnathinkbutalittledawg，andwrowtabahtitintheDilyMile（theDailyMail，apopularLondonnewspaper），shedid。
　　RANKIN。IssheSirHowrrdHallam’ssister—in—law？
　　DRINKWATER。Deeceasedwawfe’ssister：yuss：thet’swotSHEis。
　　RANKIN。Well，whataboutthem？
　　DRINKWATER。Wotabahtthem!Waw，they’reEAH。LannidahtofasteamyachtinMogadorawbernottwentyminnitsagow。GorntotheBritishcornsl’s。E’llsendemorntoyou：eyntgotnaowherestoputem。Soremawr（hire）aHarabantwoKrooboystokerrytheirlaggige。Thortawdcamanteollyer。
　　RANKIN。Thankyou。It’sverrakindofyou，Mr。Drinkwotter。
　　DRINKWATER。Down’tmentionit，gavner。Lorblessyer，wawn’tityouasconvertedme？Wotwasawwenawcameahbutaporelorstsinner？Down’tawowy’aturnferthet？Besawds，gavner，thisLidySislyWinefleetmawtwor’ttotikeawalkcrostMorocker——arawdinterthemahntnsorsechlawk。Weoll，asyouknaow，gavner，thetcawn’tbedoneeahwithahtahescort。
　　RANKIN。It’simpoassible：th’wouldoallb’murrdered。MoroccoisnotlektherestofAfrica。
　　DRINKWATER。No，gavner：theseeahMoorseztheirreligion；anitmikesemdinegerous。HeverconvertaMoor，gavner？
　　RANKIN（witharuefulsmile）。No。
　　DRINKWATER（solemnly）。Norneverwill，gavner。
　　RANKIN。Ihavebeenatworkherefortwenty—fiveyears，Mr。
　　Drinkwotter；andyouaremyfirstandonlyconvert。
　　DRINKWATER。Down’tseemnaowgood，doit，gavner？
　　RANKIN。Idon’tsaythat。IhopeIhavedonesomegood。Theycometomeformedicinewhentheyareill；andtheycallmetheChristianwhoisnotathief。THATissomething。
　　DRINKWATER。TheirmawndskennotrawsetoChristiennitylawkhahrsken，gavner：thet’sahitis。Weoll，ezhawwassyin，ifahescortiswornted，there’smawfriendandcommawnderKepnBrarsbahndoftheschoonerThenksgivin，aniscrew，incloodinmawseolf，willseethelidyanJadgeEllamthroughhennylittleexcursioninreason。Yrhonormawtmentionit。
　　RANKIN。Iwillcertainlynotproposeanythingsodangerousasanexcursion。
　　DRINKWATER（virtuously）。Naow，gavner，norwouldIawstyouto。
　　（Shakinghishead。）Naow，naow：itISdinegerous。Buthallthemorecallforahescortiftheyshouldevithintheirmawndstogow。
　　RANKIN。Ihopetheywon’t。
　　DRINKWATER。Ansowawdotoo，gavner。
　　RANKIN（pondering）。’TisstrangethattheyshouldcometoMogador，ofallplaces；andtomyhouse!IoncemetSirHowrrdHallam，yearsago。
　　DRINKWATER（amazed）。Naow!didger？Thinkothet，gavner!Waw，sowawdidtoo。Butitwereamisunnerstedin，thetwors。Lefthecourtwithahtastineonmawkerrickter，awdid。
　　RANKIN（withsomeindignation）。Ihopeyoudon’tthinkImetSirHowrrdinthatway。
　　DRINKWATER。Mawtyeppntothehonestest，bestmeaninpusson，awdoassureyer，gavner。
　　RANKIN。IwouldhaveyoutoknowthatImethimprivately，Mr。
　　Drinkwotter。Hisbrotherwasadearfriendofmine。Yearsago。HewentouttotheWestIndies。
　　DRINKWATER。TheWustHindies!Jistacrostthere，tathersawdthethowcean（pointingseaward）!Dearme!Wecamshinwithvennity，anwedeepawtsindawkness。Down’twe，gavner？
　　RANKIN（prickinguphisears）。Eh？HaveyoubeenreadingthatlittlebookIgaveyou？
　　DRINKWATER。Awhev，etoddtawms。Verycamfitn，gavner。（Herises，apprehensivelestfurthercatechismshouldfindhimunprepared。）Awllsygoodawtenoon，gavner：you’rebusyhexpectinoSrAhrdanLidySisly，yntyer？（Abouttogo。）
　　RANKIN（stoppinghim）。No，stop：we’reoalwaysreadyfortravellershere。Ihavesomethingelsetosay——aquestiontoaskyou。
　　DRINKWATR（withamisgiving，whichhemasksbyexaggeratinghisheartysailormanner）。Anweollcome，yrhonor。
　　RANKIN。WhoisthisCaptainBrassbound？
　　DRINKWATER（guiltily）。KepnBrarsbahnd!E’s—weoll，e’smawKepn，gavner。
　　RANKIN。Yes。Well？
　　DRINKWATER（feebly）。KepnoftheschoonerThenksgivin，gavner。
　　RANKIN（searchingly）。HaveyeeverhairdofabadcharacterintheseseascalledBlackPaquito？
　　DRINKWATER（withasuddenradianceofcompleteenlightenment）。
　　Aoh，narawtikesyerwivme，yrhonor。NahsammunesbinateollnyouthetKepnBrarsbahndanBleckPakeetowishawdenticallythesimepussn。Yntthetsow？
　　RANKIN。Thatisso。（Drinkwaterslapshiskneetriumphantly。Themissionaryproceedsdeterminedly）Andthesomeonewasaverrahonest，straightforwardman，asfarasIcouldjudge。
　　DRINKWATER（embracingtheimplication）。Courseawors，gavner：Evawsaidawordaginhim？Evawnah？
　　RANKIN。ButisCaptainBrassboundBlackPaquitothen？
　　DRINKWATER。Waw，it’sthenimeisblessedmathergiveimaterknee，blessislittleawt!Theryntnaowawminit。ShewareaWustHinjin——howverthereagin，yersee（pointingseaward）——
　　leastwaws，naowsheworn’t：shewereaBrazilian，awthink；anPakeetow’sBrazilianforabloominlittleperrit——awskinyrpawdnfortheword。（Sentimentally）LawkasaHinglishlidymawtcallerlittleboyBirdie。
　　RANKIN（notquiteconvinced）。ButwhyBLACKPaquito？
　　DRINKWATER（artlessly）。Waw，thebirdinitsnetralstitebeingreen，aneevinbleckair，y’knaow——
　　RANKIN（cuttinghimshort）。Isee。AndnowIwillputyeanotherquestion。WHATisCaptainBrassbound，orPaquito，orwhateverhecallshimself？
　　DRINKWATER（officiously）。Brarsbahnd，gavner。AwluscallsisseolfBrarsbahnd。
　　RANKIN。Well。Brassbound，then。Whatishe？
　　DRINKWATER（fervently）。Youawsksmewoteis，gavner？
　　RANKIN（firmly）。Ido。
　　DRINKWATFR（withrisingenthusiasm）。Anshllawteollyerwoteis，yrhonor？
　　RANKIN（notatallimpressed）。Ifyewillbesogood，Mr。
　　Drinkwotter。
　　DRINKWATER（withoverwhelmingconviction）。Thenawllteollyou，gavner，wotheis。Ee’saPaffickGenlmn：thet’swoteis。
　　RANKIN（gravely）。Mr。Drinkwotter：pairfectionisanattribute，notofWestCoastcaptains，butofthrMaaker。Andtherearegentlemenandgentlemenintheworld，espaeciallyintheselatitudes。Whichsortofgentlemanishe？
　　DRINKWATER。Hinglishgenlmn，gavner。Hinglishspeakin；Hinglishfawther；WestHinjinplawnter；Hinglishtruebluebreed。
　　（Reflectively）Techobrahnfromthemather，preps，shebeinBrazilian。
　　RANKIN。NowonyourfaithasaChristian，FelixDrinkwotter，isCaptainBrassboundaslaverornot？
　　DRINKWATER（surprisedintohisnaturalcockneypertness）。Naoweynt。
　　RANKIN。AreyeSURE？
　　DRINKWATER。Waw，asliverisabahtthewannethinginthewyofagenlmnofortntheteYNT。
　　RANKIN。I’vehairdthatexpression"gentlemanoffortune"before，Mr。Drinkwotter。Itmeanspirate。Doyeknowthat？
　　DRINKWATER。Blessy’rawt，y’cawntbeapawritnaradys。Waw，theawseasiswusspleestnorPiccadillySuckus。IfawwastodoornthetthereHetlenticHowceanthethingsawdidasabwoyintheWorterleooRowd，awdevmawaircataforeawcouldturnmawed。
　　Pawritbeblaowed!——awskinkyrpawdn，gavner。Nah，jesttoshaowyouahlittlethettherestriteforardmany’midementiononknaowedwotewasatorkinabaht：oowouldyouspowsewasthemarstertowichKepnBrarsbahndservedapprentice，asyrmawtsy？
　　RANKIN。Idon’tknow。
　　DRINKWATER。Gawdn，gavner，Gawdn。GawdnoKawtoom——stetcherstendsinTrifawlgrSquaretothisdy。TrinedBleckPakeetowinsmawshinhapthesliveriders，edid。PromistGawdnewouldn’tneversmaggleslivesnorgin，an（withsuppressedaggravation）
　　WOWN’T，gavner，notifwegowsdahnonahrbloominbendedkneestoimtodoit。
　　RANKIN（drily）。AndDOyegodownonyourbendedkneestohimtodoit？
　　DRINKWATER（somewhatabashed）。Someofhuzishanconvertedmen，gavner；antheysy：Yousmaggleswannething，Kepn；wawnothanather？
　　RANKIN。We’vecometoitatlast。Ithoughtso。CaptainBrassboundisasmuggler。
　　DRINKWATER。Weoll，wawnot？Wawnot，gavner？AhrsisaFreeTridenition。ItgowsaginusasHinglishmentoseethesebloominfurrinerssettinaptheirCastomsAhsesandspheresohinfluenceandsichlawkhallowverArfricar。Daown’tHarfricarbelongasmuchtohuzastothem？thet’swotwesy。Ennywys，thereyntnaowawminahrbusiness。Allwedazishescort，touristHOR
　　commercial。Cook’shexcursionstotheHatlasMahntns：thet’shallitis。Waw，it’sspreadincivlawzytion，itis。Yntitnah？
　　RANKIN。YouthinkCaptainBrassbound’screwsufficientlyequippedforthat，doyou？
　　DRINKWATER。Hee—quipped!Hawshouldthinksow。Lawtninrawfles，twelveshotsinthemeggezine!Oo’stostorpus？
　　RANKIN。Themostdangerouschieftainintheseparts，theSheikhSidielAssif，hasanewAmericanmachinepistolwhichfirestenbulletswithoutloadin；andhisriflehassixteenshotsinthemagazine。
　　DRINKWATER（indignantly）。Yuss；anthepeoplethatsellssichthingsintotheendso’themeathenbleckniggerscallstheirseolvesChristians!It’sacroolshime，sowitis。
　　RANKIN。Ifamanhasthehearttopullthetrigger，itmatterslittlewhatcolorhishandis，Mr。Drinkwotter。Haveyeanythingelsetosaytomethisafternoon？
　　DRINKWATER（rising）。Nathink，gavner，cepttowishyerthebustoyolth，andamanycornverts。Awtenoon，gavner。
　　RANKIN。Goodafternoontoye，Mr。Drinkwotter。
　　AsDrinkwaterturnstogo，aMoorishportercomesfromthehousewithtwoKrooboys。
　　THEPORTER（atthedoor，addressingRankin）。Bikouros（MoroccanforEpicurus，ageneralMoorishnameforthemissionaries，whoaresupposedbytheMoorstohavechosentheircallingthroughaloveofluxuriousidleness）：IhavebroughttoyourhouseaChristiandogandhiswoman。
　　DRINKWATER。There’seathenmennersferyer!CallsSrAhrdEllamanLidyWinefleetaChristiandorgandiswoman!IfeeedyouinthedorckettheCentlCrimnal，you’dfawndahtoowasthedorgandoowasismarster，prettyquick，youwould。
　　RANKIN。Haveyoubroattheirboxes？
　　THEPORTER。ByAllah，twocamelloads!
　　RANKIN。Haveyoubeenpaid？
　　THEPORTER。Onlyonemiserabledollar，Bikouros。Ihavebroughtthemtoyourhouse。Theywillpayyou。Givemesomethingforbringinggoldtoyourdoor。
　　DRINKWATER。Yah!YououghterbinbawnaChristian，youought。Youknaowtoomach。
　　RANKIN。Youhavebroatonnlytroubleandexpensetomydoor，Hassan；andyouknowit。HaveIeverchargedyourwifeandchildrenformymedicines？
　　HASSAN（philosophically）。ItisalwayspermittedbytheProphettoask，Bikouros。（HegoescheerfullyintothehousewiththeKrooboys。）
　　DRINKWATER。Jistthorteedtrahitorn，adid。Hoomannitreisthesimeeverywheres。Themeathensisjastlawkyouan’me，gavner。
　　Aladyandgentleman，bothEnglish，comeintothegarden。
　　Thegentleman，morethanelderly，isfacingoldageoncompulsion，notresignedly。Heiscleanshaven，andhasabrainyrectangularforehead，aresolutenosewithstronglygovernednostrils，andatightlyfasteneddownmouthwhichhasevidentlyshutinmuchtemperandangerinitstime。Hehasahabitofdeliberatelyassumedauthorityanddignity，butistryingtotakelifemoregeniallyandeasilyinhischaracteroftourist，whichisfurtherborneoutbyhiswhitehatandsummeryracecourseattire。
　　Theladyisbetweenthirtyandforty，tall，verygoodlooking，sympathetic，intelligent，tenderandhumorous，dressedwithcunningsimplicitynotasabusinesslike，tailormade，gaiteredtourist，butasifshelivedatthenextcottageandhaddroppedinforteainblouseandfloweredstrawhat。Awomanofgreatvitalityandhumanity，whobeginsacasualacquaintanceatthepointusuallyattainedbyEnglishpeopleafterthirtyyearsacquaintancewhentheyarecapableofreachingitatall。ShepouncesgeniallyonDrinkwater，whoissmirkingather，hatinhand，withanairofheartywelcome。Thegentleman，ontheotherhand，comesdownthesideofthegardennextthehouse，instinctivelymaintainingadistancebetweenhimselfandtheothers。
　　THELADY（toDrinkwater）。Howdyedo？Areyouthemissionary？
　　DRINKWATER（modestly）。Naow，lidy，awwillnotdeceiveyou，thowthemistikehisbutnetral。Awmwanneofthemissionary’sgoodworks，lidy——isfirstcornvert，aumbleBritishseaman——
　　countrymenoyours，lidy，andofislawdship’s。ThiseahisMr。
　　Renkin，thebustworkerinthewustcowstvawnyawd。（Introducingthejudge）Mr。Renkin：islawdshipSrAhrdEllam。（Hewithdrawsdiscreetlyintothehouse。）
　　SIRHOWARD（toRankin）。Iamsorrytointrudeonyou，Mr。Rankin；
　　butintheabsenceofahotelthereseemstobenoalternative。
　　LADYCICELY（beamingonhim）。Besides，wewouldsomuchRATHER
　　staywithyou，ifyouwillhaveus，Mr。Rankin。
　　SIRHOWARD（introducingher）。Mysister—in—law，LadyCicelyWaynflete，Mr。Rankin。
　　RANKIN。Iamgladtobeofservicetoyourleddyship。Youwillbewishingtohavesometeaafteryourjourney，I’mthinking。
　　LADYCICELY。Thoughtfulmanthatyouare，Mr。Rankin!Butwe’vehadsomealreadyonboardtheyacht。AndI’vearrangedeverythingwithyourservants；soyoumustgoongardeningjustasifwewerenothere。
　　SIRHOWARD。Iamsorrytohavetowarnyou，Mr。Rankin，thatLadyCicely，fromtravellinginAfrica，hasacquiredahabitofwalkingintopeople’shousesandbehavingasifshewereinherown。
　　LADYCICELY。But，mydearHoward，Iassureyouthenativeslikeit。
　　RANKIN（gallantly）。SodoI。
　　LADYCICELY（delighted）。Oh，thatissoniceofyou，Mr。Rankin。
　　Thisisadeliciouscountry!Andthepeopleseemsogood!Theyhavesuchnicefaces!WehadsuchahandsomeMoortocarryourluggageup!AndtwoperfectpetsofKrooboys!Didyounoticetheirfaces，Howard？
　　SIRHOWARD。Idid；andIcanconfidentlysay，afteralongexperienceoffacesoftheworsttypelookingatmefromthedock，thatIhaveneverseensoentirelyvillainousatrioasthatMoorandthetwoKrooboys，towhomyougavefivedollarswhentheywouldhavebeenperfectlysatisfiedwithone。
　　RANKIN（throwinguphishands）。Fivedollars!’TiseasytoseeyouarenotScotch，myleddy。
　　LADYCICELY。Oh，poorthings，theymustwantitmorethanwedo；
　　andyouknow，Howard，thatMahometansneverspendmoneyindrink。
　　RANKIN。Excusemeamoment，myleddy。IhaveawordinseasontosaytothatsameMoor。（Hegoesintothehouse。）
　　LADYCICELY（walkingaboutthegarden，lookingattheviewandattheflowers）。Ithinkthisisaperfectlyheavenlyplace。
　　Drinkwaterreturnsfromthehousewithachair。
　　DRINKWATER（placingthechairforSirHoward）。Awskinkyrpawdnforthelibbety，SrAhrd。
　　SIRHOWARD（lookingahim）。Ihaveseenyoubeforesomewhere。
　　DRINKWATER。Youev，SrAhrd。Butawdoassureyeritwerehallamistike。
　　SIRHOWARD。Asusual。（Hesitsdown。）Wrongfullyconvicted，ofcourse。
　　DRINKWATER（withslydelight）。Naow，gavner。（Halfwhispering，withanineffablegrin）Wrorngfullyhacquittid!
　　SIRHOWARD。Indeed!That’sthefirstcaseofthekindIhaveevermet。
　　DRINKWATER。Lawd，SrAhrd，wotjagginsesthemjurymenwas!Youanmeknaowedittoo，didn’twe？
　　SIRHOWARD。Idaresaywedid。IamsorrytosayIforgettheexactnatureofthedifficultyyouwerein。Canyourefreshmymemory？
　　DRINKWATER。Ownytheawsperritsoyouth，y’lawdship。WorterleooRowdkice。WottheycallsOoliganism。
　　SIRHOWARD。Oh!YouwereaHooligan，wereyou？
　　LADYCICELY（puzzled）。AHooligan!
　　DRINKWATER（deprecatingly）。NimegivhuzporethortlessledsbawagentontheDilyChrornicle，lidy。（Rankinreturns。Drinkwaterimmediatelywithdraws，stoppingthemissionaryforamomentnearthethresholdtosay，touchinghisforelock）Awllengabahtwithinile，gavner，hinkiceawshouldbewornted。（Hegoesintothehousewithsoftsteps。）
　　LadyCicelysitsdownonthebenchunderthetamarisk。Rankintakeshisstoolfromtheflowerbedandsitsdownonherleft，SirHowardbeingonherright。
　　LADYCICELY。Whatapleasantfaceyoursailorfriendhas，Mr。
　　Rankin!Hehasbeensofrankandtruthfulwithus。YouknowI
　　don’tthinkanybodycanpaymeagreatercomplimentthantobequitesincerewithmeatfirstsight。It’stheperfectionofnaturalgoodmanners。
　　SIRHOWARD。Youmustnotsuppose，Mr。Rankin，thatmysister—in—lawtalksnonsenseonpurpose。Shewillcontinuetobelieveinyourfrienduntilhestealsherwatch；andeventhenshewillfindexcusesforhim。
　　RANKIN（drilychangingthesubject）。Andhowhaveyebeen，SirHowrrd，sinceourlastmeetingthatmorningnighfortyyearagodownatthedocksinLondon？
　　SIRHOWARD（greatlysurprised，pullinghimselftogether）Ourlastmeeting!Mr。Rankin：haveIbeenunfortunateenoughtoforgetanoldacquaintance？
　　RANKIN。Well，perhapshardlyanacquaintance，SirHowrrd。ButI
　　wasaclosefriendofyourbrotherMiles：andwhenhesailedforBrazilIwasoneofthelittlepartythatsawhimoff。Youwereoneofthepartyalso，ifI’mnotmistaken。ItookparticularnoticeofyoubecauseyouwereMiles’sbrotherandIhadneverseenyebefore。Butyehadnocalltotakenoticeofme。
　　SIRHOWARD（reflecting）。Yes：therewasayoungfriendofmybrother’swhomightwellbeyou。Butthename，asIrecollectit，wasLeslie。
　　RANKIN。Thatwasme，sir。MynameisLeslieRankin；andyourbrotherandIwerealwaysMilesandLeslietooneanother。
　　SIRHOWARD（pluminghimselfalittle）。Ah!thatexplainsit。I
　　cantrustmymemorystill，Mr。Rankin；thoughsomepeopledocomplainthatIamgrowingold。
　　RANKIN。AndwheremayMilesbenow，SirHoward？
　　SIRHOWARD（abruptly）。Don’tyouknowthatheisdead？
　　RANKIN（muchshocked）。Neverhairdofit。Dear，dear：Ishallneverseehimagain；andIcanscarcelybringhisfacetomindafteralltheseyears。（Withmoisteningeyes，whichatoncetouchLadyCicely’ssympathy）I’mrightsorry——rightsorry。
　　SIRHOWARD（decorouslysubduinghisvoice）。Yes：hedidnotlivelong：indeed，henevercamebacktoEngland。ItmustbenearlythirtyyearsagonowthathediedintheWestIndiesonhispropertythere。
　　RANKIN（surprised）。Hisproaperty!Mileswithaproaperty!
　　SIRHOWARD。Yes：hebecameaplanter，anddidwelloutthere，Mr。
　　Rankin。Thehistoryofthatpropertyisaverycuriousandinterestingone——atleastitissotoalawyerlikemyself。
　　RANKIN。IshouldbegladtohearitforMiles’ssake，thoughIamnolawyer，SirHowrrd。
　　LADYCICELY。Ineverknewyouhadabrother，Howard。
　　SIRHOWARD（notpleasedbythisremark）。Perhapsbecauseyouneveraskedme。（TurningmoreblandlytoRankin）Iwilltellyouthestory，Mr。Rankin。WhenMilesdied，heleftanestateinoneoftheWestIndianislands。Itwasinchargeofanagentwhowasasharpishfellow，withallhiswitsabouthim。Now，sir，thatmandidathingwhichprobablycouldhardlybedonewithimpunityevenhereinMorocco，underthemostbarbarousofsurvivingcivilizations。Hequitesimplytooktheestateforhimselfandkeptit。
　　RANKIN。Buthowaboutthelaw？
　　SIRHOWARD。Thelaw，sir，inthatisland，consistedpracticallyoftheAttorneyGeneralandtheSolicitorGeneral；andthesegentlemenwerebothretainedbytheagent。Consequentlytherewasnosolicitorintheislandtotakeupthecaseagainsthim。
　　RANKIN。Issuchathingpossibleto—dayintheBritishEmpire？
　　SIRHOWARD（calmly）。Oh，quite。Quite。
　　LADYCICELY。ButcouldnotafirstratesolicitorhavebeensentoutfromLondon？
　　SIRHOWARD。Nodoubt，bypayinghimenoughtocompensatehimforgivinguphisLondonpractice：thatis，rathermorethantherewasanyreasonablelikelihoodoftheestateprovingworth。
　　RANKIN。Thentheestatewaslost？
　　SIRHOWARD。Notpermanently。Itisinmyhandsatpresent。
　　RANKIN。Thenhowdidyegetitback？
　　SIRHOWARD（withcraftyenjoymentofhisowncunning）。Byhoistingtheroguewithhisownpetard。Ihadtoleavemattersastheywereformanyyears；forIhadmyownpositionintheworldtomake。ButatlastImadeit。InthecourseofaholidaytriptotheWestIndies，Ifoundthatthisdishonestagenthadlefttheisland，andplacedtheestateinthehandsofanagentofhisown，whomhewasfoolishenoughtopayverybadly。Iputthecasebeforethatagent；andhedecidedtotreattheestateasmyproperty。Therobbernowfoundhimselfinexactlythesamepositionhehadformerlyforcedmeinto。Nobodyintheislandwouldactagainstme，leastofalltheAttorneyandSolicitorGeneral，whoappreciatedmyinfluenceattheColonialOffice。AndsoIgottheestateback。"Themillsofthegodsgrindslowly，"
　　Mr。Rankin；"buttheygrindexceedingsmall。"
　　LADYCICELY。NowIsupposeifI’ddonesuchacleverthinginEngland，you’dhavesentmetoprison。
　　SIRHOWARD。Probably，unlessyouhadtakencaretokeepoutsidethelawagainstconspiracy。Wheneveryouwishtodoanythingagainstthelaw，Cicely，alwaysconsultagoodsolicitorfirst。
　　LADYCICELY。SoIdo。Butsupposeyouragenttakesitintohisheadtogivetheestatebacktohiswickedoldemployer!
　　SIRHOWARD。Iheartilywishhewould。
　　RANKIN（openeyed）。YouwishheWOULD!!
　　SIRHOWARD。Yes。AfewyearsagothecollapseoftheWestIndiansugarindustryconvertedtheincomeoftheestateintoanannuallossofabout150poundsayear。IfIcan’tsellitsoon，Ishallsimplyabandonit——unlessyou，Mr。Rankin，wouldliketotakeitasapresent。
　　RANKIN（laughing）。Ithankyourlordship：wehaveestatesenoughofthatsortinScotland。You’resettingwithyourbacktothesun，LeddyCeecily，andlosingsomethingworthlookingat。Seethere。（Herisesandpointsseaward，wheretherapidtwilightofthelatitudehasbegun。）
　　LADYCICELY（gettinguptolookandutteringacryofadmiration）。Oh，howlovely!
　　SIRHOWARD（alsorising）。Whatarethosehillsovertheretothesoutheast？
　　RANKIN。Theyaretheoutposts，sotospeak，oftheAtlasMountains。
　　LADYCICELY。TheAtlasMountains!WhereShelley’switchlived!
　　We’llmakeanexcursiontothemto—morrow，Howard。
　　RANKIN。That’simpoassible，myleddy。Thenativesareverradangerous。
　　LADYCICELY。Why？Hasanyexplorerbeenshootingthem？
　　RANKIN。No。Buteverymanofthembelieveshewillgotoheavenifhekillsanunbeliever。
　　LADYCICELY。Blessyou，dearMr。Rankin，thepeopleinEnglandbelievethattheywillgotoheaveniftheygivealltheirpropertytothepoor。Buttheydon’tdoit。I’mnotabitafraidofthat。
　　RANKIN。Buttheyarenotaccustomedtoseewomengoingaboutunveiled。
　　LADYCICELY。Ialwaysgetonbestwithpeoplewhentheycanseemyface。
　　SIRHOWARD。Cicely：youaretalkinggreatnonsenseandyouknowit。Thesepeoplehavenolawstorestrainthem，whichmeans，inplainEnglish，thattheyarehabitualthievesandmurderers。
　　RANKIN。Nay，nay：notexactlythat，LADYCICELY（indignantly）。Ofcoursenot。Youalwaysthink，Howard，thatnothingpreventspeoplekillingeachotherbutthefearofyourhangingthemforit。Butwhatnonsensethatis!Andhowwicked!Ifthesepeopleweren’thereforsomegoodpurpose，theywouldn’thavebeenmade，wouldthey，Mr。Rankin？
　　RANKIN。Thatisapoint，certainly，LeddyCeecily。
　　SIRHOWARD。Oh，ifyouaregoingtotalktheology——
　　LADYCICELY。Well，whynot？theologyisasrespectableaslaw，I
　　shouldthink。Besides，I’monlytalkingcommonsense。Whydopeoplegetkilledbysavages？Becauseinsteadofbeingpolitetothem，andsayingHowdyedo？likeme，peopleaimpistolsatthem。
　　I’vebeenamongsavages——cannibalsandallsorts。Everybodysaidthey’dkillme。ButwhenImetthem，IsaidHowdyedo？andtheywerequitenice。Thekingsalwayswantedtomarryme。
　　SIRHOWARD。Thatdoesnotseemtometomakeyouanysaferhere，Cicely。Youshallcertainlynotstirastepbeyondtheprotectionoftheconsul，ifIcanhelpit，withoutastrongescort。
　　LADYCICELY。Idon’twantanescort。
　　SIRHOWARD。Ido。AndIsupposeyouwillexpectmetoaccompanyyou。
　　RANKIN。’Tisnotsafe，LeddyCeecily。Reallyandtruly，’tisnotsafe。Thetribesareverrafierce；andtherearecitiesherethatnoChristianhaseversetfootin。Ifyougowithoutbeingwellprotected，thefirstchiefyoumeetwellseizeyouandsendyoubackagaintopreventhisfollowersmurderingyou。
　　LADYCICELY。Oh，howniceofhim，Mr。Rankin!
　　RANKIN。Hewouldnotdoitforyoursake，LeddyCeecily，butforhisown。TheSultanwouldgetintotroublewithEnglandifyouwerekilled；andtheSultanwouldkillthechieftopacifytheEnglishgovernment。
　　LADYCICELY。ButIalwaysgoeverywhere。IKNOWthepeopleherewon’ttouchme。Theyhavesuchnicefacesandsuchprettyscenery。
　　SIRHOWARD（toRankin，sittingdownagainresignedly）。Youcanimaginehowmuchusethereisintalkingtoawomanwhoadmiresthefacesoftheruffianswhoinfesttheseports，Mr。Rankin。Cananythingbedoneinthewayofanescort？
　　RANKIN。ThereisacertainCaptainBrassboundherewhotradesalongthecoast，andoccasionallyescortspartiesofmerchantsonjourneysintotheinterior。IunderstandthatheservedunderGordonintheSoudan。
　　SIRHOWARD。Thatsoundspromising。ButIshouldliketoknowalittlemoreabouthimbeforeItrustmyselfinhishands。
　　RANKIN。Iquiteagreewithyou，SirHowrrd。I’llsendFelixDrinkwotterforhim。（Heclapshishands。AnArabboyappearsatthehousedoor。）Muley：issailormanhere？（Muleynods。）Tellsailormanbringcaptain。（Muleynodsandgoes。）
　　SIRHOWARD。WhoisDrinkwater？
　　RANKIN。Hisagent，ormate：Idon’trightlyknowwhich。
　　LADYCICELY。Oh，ifhehasamatenamedFelixDrinkwater，itmustbequitearespectablecrew。Itissuchanicename。
　　RANKIN。Yousawhimherejustnow。Heisaconvertofmine。
　　LADYCICELY（delighted）。Thatnicetruthfulsailor!
　　SIRHOWARD（horrified）。What!TheHooligan!
　　RANKIN（puzzled）。Hooligan？No，mylord：heisanEnglishman。
　　SIRHOWARD。MydearMr。Rankin，thismanwastriedbeforemeonachargeofstreetruffianism。
　　RANKIN。Sohetoldme。Hewasbadlybroatup，Iamafraid。Butheisnowaconvertedman。
　　LADYCICELY。Ofcourseheis。Histellingyousofranklyprovesit。Youknow，really，Howard，allthosepoorpeoplewhomyoutryaremoresinnedagainstthansinning。Ifyouwouldonlytalktotheminafriendlywayinsteadofpassingcruelsentencesonthem，youwouldfindthemquitenicetoyou。（Indignantly）I
　　won’thavethispoormantrampledonmerelybecausehismotherbroughthimupasaHooligan。Iamsurenobodycouldbenicerthanhewaswhenhespoketous。
　　SIRHOWARD。Inshort，wearetohaveanescortofHooliganscommandedbyafilibuster。Verywell，verywell。Youwillmostlikelyadmirealltheirfaces；andIhavenodoubtatallthattheywilladmireyours。
　　DrinkwatercomesfromthehousewithanItaliandressedinamuchwornsuitofblueserge，adilapidatedAlpinehat，andbootslacedwithscrapsoftwine。Heremainsnearthedoor，whilstDrinkwatercomesforwardbetweenSirHowardandLadyCicely。
　　DRINKWATER。Yrhonor’sservant。（TotheItalian）Mawtzow：islawdshipSrAhrdEllam。（Marzotoucheshishat。）ErLidyshipLidyWinefleet。（Marzotoucheshishat。）Hawtellianshipmite，lidy。
　　Hahrchef。
　　LADYCICELY（noddingaffablytoMarzo）。Howdyedo？IloveItaly。
　　Whatpartofitwereyoubornin？
　　DRINKWATER。Worn’tbawninHitlyatall，lidy。BawninEttnGawdn（HattonGarden）。HawcebarreranstreetpiannerHawtellian，lidy：
　　thet’swoteis。KepnBrarsbahnd’srespectstoyrhonors；aneawitesyrcommawnds。
　　RANKIN。Shallwegoindoorstoseehim？
　　SIRHOWARD。Ithinkwehadbetterhavealookathimbydaylight。
　　RANKIN。Thenwemustlosenotime：thedarkissoondowninthislatitude。（ToDrinkwater）Willyeaskhimtostepoutheretous，Mr。Drinkwotter？
　　DRINKWATER。Rawtyouaw，gavner。（Hegoesofficiouslyintothehouse。）
　　LadyCicelyandRankinsitdownasbeforetoreceivetheCaptain。
　　Thelightisbythistimewaningrapidly，thedarknesscreepingwestintotheorangecrimson。
　　LADYCICELY（whispering）。Don’tyoufeelrathercreepy，Mr。
　　Rankin？Iwonderwhathe’llbelike。
　　RANKIN。Imisdoubtmehewillnotanswer，yourleddyship。
　　Thereisascufflingnoiseinthehouse；andDrinkwatershootsoutthroughthedoorwayacrossthegardenwitheveryappearanceofhavingbeenviolentlykicked。MarzoimmediatelyhurriesdownthegardenonSirHoward’srightoutoftheneighborhoodofthedoorway。
　　DRINKWATER（tryingtoputacheerfulaironmuchmortificationandbodilyanguish）。Narstysteptotheteredoortrippedmehap，itdid。（Raisinghisvoiceandnarrowlyescapingasqueakofpain）
　　KepnBrarsbahnd。（Hegetsasfarfromthehouseaspossible，onRankin’sleft。Rankinrisestoreceivehisguest。）
　　Anolivecomplexionedmanwithdarksoutherneyesandhaircomesfromthehouse。Ageabout36。Handsomefeatures，butjoyless；
　　darkeyebrowsdrawntowardsoneanother；mouthsetgrimly；
　　nostrilslargeandstrained：afacesettoonetragicpurpose。A
　　manoffewwords，fewergestures，andmuchsignificance。Onthewhole，interesting，andevenattractive，butnotfriendly。Hestandsforamoment，saturnineintheruddylight，toseewhoispresent，lookinginasingularandratherdeadlywayatSirHoward；thenwithsomesurpriseanduneasinessatLadyCicely。
　　Finallyhecomesdownintothemiddleofthegarden，andconfrontsRankin，whohasbeenglaringathiminconsternationfromthemomentofhisentrance，andcontinuestodosoinsomarkedawaythattheglowinBrassbound’seyesdeepensashebeginstotakeoffence。
　　BRASSBOUND。Well，sir，haveyoustaredyourfillatme？
　　RANKIN（recoveringhimselfwithastart）。Iaskyourpardonformybadmanners，CaptainBrassbound。Yeareextraordinairlekanauldcollegefriendofmine，whosefaceIsaidnottenminutesgonethatIcouldnolongerbringtomind。Itwasasifhehadcomefromthegravetoremindmeofit。
　　BRASSBOUND。Whyhaveyousentforme？
　　RANKIN。Wehaveamatterofbusinesswithye，Captain。
　　BRASSBOUND。Whoare"we"？
　　RANKIN。ThisisSirHowrrdHallam，whowillbewellknowntoyeasoneofHerMajesty’sjudges。
　　BRASSBOUND（turningthesingularlookagainonSirHoward）。Thefriendofthewidow!theprotectorofthefatherless!
　　SIRHOWARD（startled）。IdidnotknowIwassofavorablyspokenofintheseparts，CaptainBrassbound。Wewantanescortforatripintothemountains。
　　BRASSBOUND（ignoringthisannouncement）。Whoisthelady？
　　RANKIN。LadyCeecilyWaynflete，hislordship’ssister—in—law。
　　LADYCICELY。Howdyedo，CaptainBrassbound？（Hebowsgravely。）
　　SIRHOWARD（alittleimpatientofthesequestions，whichstrikehimassomewhatimpertinent）。Letuscometobusiness，ifyouplease。Wearethinkingofmakingashortexcursiontoseethecountryabouthere。Canyouprovideuswithanescortofrespectable，trustworthymen？
　　BRASSBOUND。No。
　　DRINKWATER（instrongremonstrance）。Nah，nah，nah!Nahlookeah，Kepn，y’knaow——
　　BRASSBOUND（betweenhisteeth）。Holdyourtongue。
　　DRINKWATER（abjectly）。Yuss，Kepn。
　　RANKIN。Iunderstooditwasyourbusinesstoprovideescorts，CaptainBrassbound。
　　BRASSBOUND。Youwererightlyinformed。ThatISmybusiness。
　　LADYCICELY。Thenwhywon’tyoudoitforus？
　　BRASSBOUND。Youarenotcontentwithanescort。Youwantrespectable，trustworthymen。YoushouldhavebroughtadivisionofLondonpolicemenwithyou。Mymenareneitherrespectablenortrustworthy。
　　DRINKWATER（unabletocontainhimself）。Nah，nah，lookeah，Kepn。
　　Ifyouwanttobemoddist，bemoddistonyouraownaccahnt，nortonmawn。
　　BRASSBOUND。Youseewhatmymenarelike。Thatrascal（indicatingMarzo）wouldcutathroatforadollarifhehadcourageenough。
　　MARZO。Inotunderstand。InospikEnglis。
　　BRASSBOUND。Thisthing（pointingtoDrinkwater）isthegreatestliar，thief，drunkard，andrapscalliononthewestcoast。
　　DRINKWATER（affectinganironicindifference）。Goworn，Goworn。
　　SrAhrdezerdwitnessestomawkerrickterafoah。Eknaowsahmechtobelieveofem。
　　LADYCICELY。CaptainBrassbound：Ihaveheardallthatbeforeabouttheblacks；andIfoundthemverynicepeoplewhentheywereproperlytreated。
　　DRINKWATER（chuckling：theItalianisalsogrinning）。Nah，Kepn，nah!Owpyrprahdoy’seolfnah。
　　BRASSBOUND。Iquiteunderstandthepropertreatmentforhim，madam。Ifheopenshismouthagainwithoutmyleave，Iwillbreakeveryboneinhisskin。
　　LADYCICELY（inhermostsunnilymatter—of—factway）。DoesCaptainBrassboundalwaystreatyoulikethis，Mr。Drinkwater？
　　Drinkwaterhesitates，andlooksapprehensivelyattheCaptain。
　　BRASSBOUND。Answer，youdog，whentheladyordersyou。（ToLadyCicely）DonotaddresshimasMr。Drinkwater，madam：heisaccustomedtobecalledBrandyfacedJack。
　　DRINKWATER（indignantly）。Eah，awsy!nahlookeah，Kepn：mawnimeisDrinkworter。YouawskemetSinJorn’sintheWorterleooRowd。Ornmawgrenfawther’stombstown，itis。
　　BRASSBOUND。Itwillbeonyourowntombstone，presently，ifyoucannotholdyourtongue。（Turningtotheothers）Letusunderstandoneanother，ifyouplease。Anescorthere，oranywherewheretherearenoregulardisciplinedforces，iswhatitscaptainmakesit。IfIundertakethisbusiness，Ishallbeyourescort。Imayrequireadozenmen，justasImayrequireadozenhorses。Someofthehorseswillbevicious；sowillallthemen。Ifeitherhorseormantriesanyofhisviciousnessonme，somuchtheworseforhim；butitwillmakenodifferencetoyou。
　　Iwillordermymentobehavethemselvesbeforethelady；andtheyshallobeytheirorders。ButtheladywillpleaseunderstandthatItakemyownwaywiththemandsuffernointerference。
　　LADYCICELY。CaptainBrassbound：Idon’twantanescortatall。
　　Itwillsimplygetusallintodanger；andIshallhavethetroubleofgettingitoutagain。That’swhatescortsalwaysdo。
　　ButsinceSirHowardprefersanescort，Ithinkyouhadbetterstayathomeandletmetakechargeofit。Iknowyourmenwillgetonperfectlywellifthey’reproperlytreated。
　　DRINKWATER（withenthusiasm）。Feedahtoyrand，lidy，wewould。
　　BRASSBOUND（withsardonicassent）。Good。Iagree。（ToDrinkwater）
　　Youshallgowithoutme。
　　DRINKWATER。（terrified）。Eah!Wotareyouasyinorn？Wecawn’tgowwithahtyer。（ToLadyCicely）Naow，lidy：itwouldn’tbeforyrhowngood。Yercawn’thexpectalotopoorhoneddikitedmenlawkhuztoranahrseolvsintodinegerwithahtnaowKepntoteolluswottodo。Naow，lidy：hoonawtedwestend：deevawdidwefall。
　　LADYCICELY。Oh，ifyoupreferyourcaptain，havehimbyallmeans。DoyouLIKEtobetreatedashetreatsyou？
　　DAINKWATER（withasmileofvanity）。Weoll，lidy：ycawn’tdeenawthate’saPaffickGenlmn。Bithawbitrairy，preps；buthinagenlmnyoulooksforsich。IttikesahawbitrairywannetoknockahtthemeathenShikes，awteollyer。
　　BRASSBOUND。That’senough。Go。
　　DRINKWATER。Weoll，awwashownlyateollnthelidythet——（A
　　threateningmovementfromBrassboundcutshimshort。Hefliesforhislifeintothehouse，followedbytheItalian。）
　　BRASSBOUND。Yourladyshipsees。Thesemenservemebytheirownfreechoice。Iftheyaredissatisfied，theygo。IfIamdissatisfied，theygo。TheytakecarethatIamnotdissatisfied。
　　SIRHOWARD（whohaslistenedwithapprovalandgrowingconfidence）。CaptainBrassbound：youarethemanIwant。Ifyourtermsareatallreasonable，Iwillacceptyourservicesifwedecidetomakeanexcursion。Youdonotobject，Cicely，Ihope。
　　LADYCICELY。Ohno。Afterall，thosemenmustreallylikeyou，CaptainBrassbound。Ifeelsureyouhaveakindheart。Youhavesuchniceeyes。
　　SIRHOWARD（scandalized）。MyDEARCicely：youreallymustrestrainyourexpressionsofconfidenceinpeople’seyesandfaces。（ToBrassbound）Now，aboutterms，Captain？
　　BRASSBOUND。Wheredoyouproposetogo？
　　SIRHOWARD。Ihardlyknow。WhereCANwego，Mr。Rankin？
　　RANKIN。Takemyadvice，SirHowrrd。Don’tgofar。
　　BRASSBOUND。IcantakeyoutoMeskala，fromwhichyoucanseetheAtlasMountains。FromMeskalaIcantakeyoutoanancientcastleinthehills，whereyoucanputupaslongasyouplease。Thecustomarychargeishalfadollaramanperdayandhisfood。I
　　chargedouble。
　　SIRHOWARD。Isupposeyouanswerforyourmenbeingsturdyfellows，whowillstandtotheirgunsifnecessary。
　　BRASSBOUND。IcananswerfortheirbeingmoreafraidofmethanoftheMoors。
　　LADYCICELY。Thatdoesn’tmatterintheleast，Howard。Theimportantthing，CaptainBrassbound，is：first，thatweshouldhaveasfewmenaspossible，becausemengivesuchalotoftroubletravelling。Andthen，theymusthavegoodlungsandnotbealwayscatchingcold。Aboveall，theirclothesmustbeofgoodwearingmaterial。OtherwiseIshallbenursingandstitchingandmendingalltheway；anditwillbetroubleenough，Iassureyou，tokeepthemwashedandfedwithoutthat。
　　BRASSBOUND（haughtily）。Mymen，madam，arenotchildreninthenursery。
　　LADYCICELY（withunanswerableconviction）。CaptainBrassbound：
　　allmenarechildreninthenursery。Iseethatyoudon’tnoticethings。ThatpoorItalianhadonlyoneproperbootlace：theotherwasabitofstring。AndIamsurefromMr。Drinkwater’scomplexionthatheoughttohavesomemedicine。
　　BRASSBOUND（outwardlydeterminednottobetrifledwith：inwardlypuzzledandratherdaunted）。Madam：ifyouwantanescort，Icanprovideyouwithanescort。IfyouwantaSundaySchooltreat，I
　　canNOTprovideit。
　　LADYCICELY（withsweetmelancholy）。Ah，don’tyouwishyoucould，Captain？Oh，ifIcouldonlyshowyoumychildrenfromWaynfleteSundaySchool!Thedarlingswouldlovethisplace，withallthecamelsandblackmen。I’msureyouwouldenjoyhavingthemhere，CaptainBrassbound；anditwouldbesuchaneducationforyourmen!（Brassboundstaresatherwithdryinglips。）
　　SIRHOWARD。Cicely：whenyouhavequitedonetalkingnonsensetoCaptainBrassbound，wecanproceedtomakesomedefinitearrangementwithhim。
　　LADYCICELY。Butit’sarrangedalready。We’llstartateighto’clockto—morrowmorning，ifyouplease，Captain。NevermindabouttheItalian：IhaveabigboxofclotheswithmeformybrotherinRome；andtherearesomebootlacesinit。Nowgohometobedanddon’tfussyourself。Allyouhavetodoistobringyourmenround；andI’llseetotherest。Menarealwayssonervousaboutmoving。Goodnight。（Sheoffershimherhand。
　　Surprised，hepullsoffhiscapforthefirsttime。Somescruplepreventshimfromtakingherhandatonce。Hehesitates；thenturnstoSirHowardandaddresseshimwithwarningearnestness。）
　　BRASSBOUND。SirHowardHallam：Iadviseyounottoattemptthisexpedition。
　　SIRHOWARD。Indeed!Why？
　　BRASSBOUND。Youaresafehere。Iwarnyou，inthosehillsthereisajusticethatisnotthejusticeofyourcourtsinEngland。
　　Ifyouhavewrongedaman，youmaymeetthatmanthere。Ifyouhavewrongedawoman，youmaymeethersonthere。Thejusticeofthosehillsisthejusticeofvengeance。
　　SIRHOWARD（faintlyamused）。Youaresuperstitious，Captain。Mostsailorsare，Inotice。However，Ihavecompleteconfidenceinyourescort。
　　BRASSBOUND（almostthreateningly）。Takecare。Theavengermaybeoneoftheescort。
　　SIRHOWARD。Ihavealreadymettheonlymemberofyourescortwhomighthaveborneagrudgeagainstme，Captain；andhewasacquitted。
　　BRASSBOUND。Youarefatedtocome，then？
　　SIRHOWARD（smiling）。Itseemsso。
　　BRASSBOUND。Onyourheadbeit!（ToLadyCicely，acceptingherhandatlast）Goodnight。
　　Hegoes。Itisbythistimestarrynight。
　　ACTII
　　Midday。AroaminaMoorishcastle。Adivanseatrunsroundthedilapidatedadobewalls，whicharepartlypainted，partlyfacedwithwhitetilespatternedingreenandyellow。Theceilingismadeupoflittlesquares，paintedinbrightcolors，withgildededges，andornamentedwithgiltknobs。Onthecementflooraremattings，sheepskins，andleatherncushionswithgeometricalpatternsonthem。ThereisatinyMoorishtableinthemiddle；
　　andatitahugesaddle，withsaddleclothsofvariouscolors，showingthattheroomisusedbyforeignersaccustomedtochairs。
　　Anyonesittingatthetableinthisseatwouldhavethechiefentrance，alargehorseshoearch，onhisleft，andanothersaddleseatbetweenhimandthearch；whilst，ifsusceptibletodraughts，hewouldprobablycatchcoldfromalittleMoorishdoorinthewallbehindhimtohisright。
　　TwoorthreeofBrassbound’smen，overcomebythemiddayheat，sprawlsupineonthefloor，withtheirreefercoatsundertheirheads，theirkneesuplifted，andtheircalveslaidcomfortablyonthedivan。Thosewhowearshirtshavethemopenatthethroatforgreatercoolness。Somehavejerseys。Allwearbootsandbelts，andhavegunsreadytotheirhands。Oneofthem，lyingwithhisheadagainstthesecondsaddleseat，wearswhatwasonceafashionablewhiteEnglishyachtingsuit。HeisevidentlyapleasantlyworthlessyoungEnglishgentlemangonetothebad，butretainingsufficientself—respecttoshavecarefullyandbrushhishair，whichiswearingthin，anddoesnotseemtohavebeenluxurianteveninitsbestdays。
　　Thesilenceisbrokenonlybythesnoresoftheyounggentleman，whosemouthhasfallenopen，untilafewdistantshotshalfwakenhim。Heshutshismouthconvulsively，andopenshiseyessleepily。Adoorisviolentlykickedoutside；andthevoiceofDrinkwaterisheardraisingurgentalarm。
　　DRINKWATER。Wotow!Wikeapthere，willyr。Wikeap。（Herushesinthroughthehorseshoearch，hotandexcited，andrunsround，kickingthesleepers）Nahthen。Gitap。Gitap，willyr，KiddyRedbrook。（Hegivestheyoungqentlemanarudeshove。）
　　REDBOOK（sittingup）。Stowthat，willyou。What’samiss？
　　DRINKWATER（disgusted）。Wot’samiss!Didn’teahnaowfawrin，I
　　spowse。
　　REDBROOK。No。
　　DRINKWATER（sneering）。Naow。Thortitsifernort，didn’tyr？
　　REDBROOK（withcrispintelligence）。What!You’rerunningaway，areyou？（Hespringsup，crying）Lookalive，Johnnies：there’sdanger。BrandyfacedJack’sontherun。（Theyspringuphastily，graspingtheirguns。）
　　DRINKWATER。Dineger!Yuss：shouldthinkthereworsdineger。It’showver，thow，asitmowstlyhisbawthetawmYOU’REawike。（Theyrelapseintolassitude。）Wawwasn’tyouonthelook—ahttogiveusaend？BinhatteckedbawtheBennySeeras（BeniSiras），weev，anedtorawdforitprettystrite，too，awteollyr。Mawtzowisit：thebulletglawnstallrahndisbloominbrisket。BrarsbahndedropttheShike’sossatsixunnernfiftyyawds。（Bustlingthemabout）Nahthen：gittheplicereadyfortheBritishherristoracy，LawdEllamandLidyWineflete。
　　REDBOOK。Ladyfaint，eh？
　　DRINKWATER。Fynt!Notlawkly。Worntedtogowantalk，totheBennySeeras：blaowmeifshedidn’t!huzwotwewasfrahtndof。
　　TyinupMawtzow’swound，sheis，likeabloominorspittlenass。
　　（SirHoward，withacopiouspagrionhiswhitehat，entersthroughthehorseshoearch，followedbyacoupleofmensupportingthewoundedMarzo，who，weepingandterrorstrickenbytheprospectofdeathandofsubsequenttormentsforwhichheisconsciousofhavingeminentlyqualifiedhimself，hashiscoatoffandabandageroundhischest。Oneofhissupportersisablackbearded，thickset，slow，middle—agedmanwithanairofdamagedrespectability，named——asitafterwardsappears——Johnson。
　　LadyCicelywalksbesideMarzo。Redbrook，alittleshamefaced，crossestheroomtotheoppositewallasfarawayaspossiblefromthevisitors。Drinkwaterturnsandreceivesthemwithjocularceremony。）WeolcometoBrarsbahndCawstl，SrAhrdanlidy。Thiseahisthecorfeeandcommercialroom。
　　SirHowardgoestothetableandsitsonthesaddle，ratherexhausted。LadyCicelycomestoDrinkwater。
　　LADYCICELY。WhereisMarzo’sbed？
　　DRINKWATER。Isbed，lidy？Weoll：eyntpetickler，lidy。Eezischawceofhennyflegstownaginthetwall。
　　TheydepositMarzoontheflagsagainstthewallclosetothelittledoor。Hegroans。JohnsonphlegmaticallyleaveshimandjoinsRedbrook。
　　LADYCICELY。Butyoucan’tleavehimthereinthatstate。
　　DRINKWATER。Ow：e’shallrawt。（StrollingupcallouslytoMarzo）
　　You’rehallrawt，yntyer，Mawtzow？（Marzowhimpers。）Corsey’aw。
　　LADYCICELY（toSirHoward）。Didyoueverseesuchahelplesslotofpoorcreatures？（Shemakesforthelittledoor。）
　　DRINKWATER。Eah!（Herunstothedoorandplaceshimselfbeforeit。）Wheremawtyrlidyshipbegowin？
　　LADYCICELY。I’mgoingthrougheveryroominthiscastletofindaproperplacetoputthatman。AndnowI’lltellyouwhereYOU’REgoing。You’regoingtogetsomewaterforMarzo，whoisverythirsty。Andthen，whenI’vechosenaroomforhim，you’regoingtomakeabedforhimthere。
　　DRINKWATER（sarcastically）。Ow!Hennyatherlittlesuvvice？Mikeyrseolfatowm，y’knaow，lidy。
　　LADYCICELY（considerately）。Don’tgoifyou’drathernot，Mr。
　　Drinkwater。Perhapsyou’retootired。（Turningtothearchway）
　　I’llaskCaptainBrassbound：hewon’tmind。
　　DRINKWATER（terrified，runningafterherandgettingbetweenherandthearch）。Naow，naow!Naow，lidy：doesn’tyougoesdisturbintheKepn。Awllseetoit。
　　LADYCICELY（gravely）。Iwassureyouwould，Mr。Drinkwater。Youhavesuchakindface。（Sheturnsbackandgoesoutthroughthesmalldoor。）
　　DRINKWATER（lookingafterher）。Garn!
　　SIRHOWARD（toDrinkwater）。Willyouaskoneofyourfriendstoshowmetomyroomwhilstyouaregettingthewater？
　　DRINKWATER（insolently）。Yrroom!Ow：thisyntgoodenaffryr，yntit？（Ferociously）Ooayouorderinabaht，ih？
　　SIRHOWARD（risingquietly，andtakingrefugebetweenRedbrookandJohnson，whomheaddresses）。Canyoufindmeamoreprivateroomthanthis？
　　JOHNSON（shakinghishead）。I’venoorders。Youmustwaittilthecapncomes，sir。
　　DRINKWATER（followingSirHoward）。Yuss；anwhawlyou’rewitin，ylltikeyourhordersfromme：see？
　　JOHNSON（withslowseverity，toDrinkwater）。Lookhere：doyouseethreegenlmentalkintooneanotherhere，civilandprivate，eh？
　　DRINKWATER（chapfallen）。Nooffence，MisteJornsn——
　　JOHNSON（ominously）。Ay；butthereisoffence。Where’syourmanners，youguttersnipe？（TurningtoSirHoward）That’sthecurseothiskindolife，sir：yougottoassociatewithallsorts。Myfather，sir，wasCapnJohnsonoHull——ownedhisownschooner，sir。We’remostlygentlemenhere，sir，asyou’llfind，exceptthepoorignorantforeignerandthattherescumofthesubmergedtenth。（ContemptuouslylookingatDrinkwater）HEain’tnobody’sson：he’sonlyaoffspringocosterfolkorsuch。
　　DRINKWATER（burstingintotears）。Clawssfeelin!thet’swotitis：clawssfeelin!Wotareyer，arterall，batabloomingangowestcowstcazhls（casualwardpaupers）？（Johnsonisscandalized；
　　andthereisageneralthrillofindignation。）Betterevnaowfembly，anrawseahtofit，lawkme，thanevaspecbleoneanddisgriceit，lawkyou。
　　JOHNSON。BrandyfacedJack：Inameyouforconductandlanguageunbecomingtoagentleman。Thosewhoagreewillsignifythesameintheusualmanner。
　　ALL（vehemently）。Aye。
　　DRINKWATER（wildly）。Naow。
　　JOHNSON。FelixDrinkwater：areyougoinout，orareyougointowaittilyou’rechuckedout？Youcancryinthepassage。Ifyougiveanytrouble，you’llhavesomethingtocryfor。
　　TheymakeathreatenngmovementtowardsDrinkwater。
　　DRINKWATER（whimpering）。Youleemealown：awmgowin。There’sn’mawtruedemmecrettickfeelineahthanthereisintheowlbloominMdivisionofNoontnCorzwycoppers（NewingtonCausewaypolicemen）。
　　Asheslinksawayintearstowardsthearch，Brassboundenters。
　　Drinkwaterpromptlysheltershimselfonthecaptain’slefthand，theothersretreatingtotheoppositesideasBrassboundadvancestothemiddleoftheroom。SirHowardretiresbehindthemandseatshimselfonthedivan，muchfatigued。
　　BRASSBOUND（toDrinkwater）。Whatareyousnivellingat？
　　DRINKWATER。Youawskthewustcowstherristorcracy。Theyfawndsmawcornduckhanbecammintoagenlmn。
　　BrassboundisabouttoaskJohnsonforanexplanation，whenLadyCicelyreturnsthroughthelittledoor，andcomesbetweenBrassboundandDrinkwater。
　　LADYCICELY（toDrinkwater）。Haveyoufetchedthewater？
　　DRINKWATER。Yuss：nahYOUbeginornme。（Heweepsafresh。）
　　LADYCICELY（surprised）。Oh!Thiswon’tdo，Mr。Drinkwater。Ifyoucry，Ican’tletyounurseyourfriend。