首页 >出版文学> Initials Only>第33章

第33章

  Quietlyherepeatedthelastphrase。”’ButheisgettingwellfastandwillsoonbereadytotakeupthemanagementoftheWorkswhichwasgivenhimjustbeforehewastakenill。’ThatwillshowherthatIamworkingup,”hebrightlyremarkedasDoriscarefullypennedthelastword。”Ofmyselfyouneedsaynothingmore,unless-”hepausedandhisfacetookonawistfullookwhichDorisdarednotmeet;”unless-butno,no,shemustthinkithasbeenonlyapassingindisposition。IfsheknewIhadbeenreallyill,shewouldsuffer,andperhapsactimprudentlyorsufferandnotdaretoactatall,whichmightbesadderforherstill。Leaveitwhereitisandbeginaboutyourself。Writeagooddealaboutyourself,sothatshewillseethatyouarenotworriedandthatalliswellwithushere。Cannotyoudothatwithoutassistance?Surelyyoucantellheraboutthatlastpieceofembroideryyoushowedme。Shewillbegladtohear-why,Doris!””Oh,Mr。Brotherson,”thepoorchildburstout,”youmustletmecry!I’msogladtoseeyoubetterandinterestedinallsortsofthings。Thesearenottearsofgrief。I-I-butI’mforgettingwhatthedoctortoldme。Youaregrowingexcited,andIwastoseethatyouwerecalm,alwayscalm。Iwilltakemydeskaway。Iwillwritetherestintheotherroom,whileyoulookatthemagazines。””Butbringyourletterbackformetoseal。Iwanttoseeitinitsenvelope。Oh,Doris,youareagoodlittlegirl!”
  Sheshookherhead,andhastenedtohideherselffromhimintheotherroom;anditwasalongtimebeforeshecamebackwiththeletterfoldedandinitsenvelope。Whenshedid,herfacewascomposedandhermannernatural。Shehadquitemadeuphermindwhatherdutywasandhowshewasgoingtoperformit。”Hereistheletter,”saidshe,layingitinhisoutstretchedhand。
  Thensheturnedherback。Sheknew,withawoman’sunerringinstinctwhyhewishedtohandleitbeforeitwent。Shefeltthatkisshefoldedawayinit,ineveryfibreofherarousedandsympatheticheart,butthehardestpartoftheordealwasoverandhereyesbeamedsoftlywhensheturnedagaintotakeitfromhishandandaffixthestamp。”Youwillmailityourself?”heasked。”Ishouldliketohaveyouputitintotheboxwithyourownhand。””Iwillputitinto-night,aftersupper,”shepromisedhim。
  Hissmileofcontentmentassuredherthatthistrialofhercourageandself-controlwasnotwithoutoneblessedresult。Hewouldrestforseveraldaysinthepleasureofwhathehaddoneorthoughthehaddone。SheneednotcringebeforethatimageofDreadfortwo,threedaysatleast。Meanwhile,hewouldgrowstronginbody,andshe,perhaps,inspirit。Onlyoneprecautionshemusttake。NohintofMr。Challoner’spresenceintownmustreachhim。Hemustbeguardedfromaknowledgeofthatfactascertainlyasfromthemoreseriousonewhichlaybehindit。
  XXVIII
  IHOPENEVERTOSEETHATMAN
  Thatthiswouldbeadifficultthingtodo,Doriswassoontorealise。Mr。Challonercontinuedtopassthehousetwiceadayandthetimefinallycamewhenheventuredupthewalk。
  Doriswasinthewindowandsawhimcoming。Sheslippedsoftlyoutandinterceptedhimbeforehehadsteppedupontheporch。Shehadcaughtupherhatasshepassedthroughthehall,andwasfittingittoherheadashelookedupandsawher。”MissScott?”heasked。”Yes,Mr。Challoner。””Youknowme?”hewenton,onefootonthestepandonestillonthewalk。
  Beforereplyingsheclosedthedoorbehindher。Thenasshenotedhissurpriseshecarefullyexplained:”Mr。Brotherson,ourboarder,isjustrecoveringfromtyphoid。Heisstillweakandacutelysusceptibletotheleastnoise。Iwasafraidthatourvoicesmightdisturbhim。Doyoumindwalkingalittlewayuptheroad?Thatis,ifyourvisitwasintendedforme。”
  Herflush,thebeautywhichmusthavestruckeverhim,butmorethanallelseheryouth,seemedtoreconcilehimtothisunconventionalrequest。Bowing,hetookhisfootfromthestep,saying,asshejoinedhim:”Yes,youaretheoneIwantedtosee;thatis,to-day。Later,I
  hopetohavetheprivilegeofaconversationwithMr。Brotherson。”
  Shegavehimonequicklook,tremblingsothatheofferedherhisarmwithafatherlyair。”Iseethatyouunderstandmyerrandhere,”heproceeded,withagravesmile,meantassheknewforherencouragement。”Iamglad,becausewecangoatoncetothepoint。MissScott,”hecontinuedinavoicefromwhichhenolongerstrovetokeepbacktheevidencesofdeepfeeling,”Ihavethestrongestinterestinyourpatientthatonemancanhaveinanother,wherethereisnopersonalacquaintanceship。Youwhohaveeveryreasontounderstandmyreasonsforthis,willacceptthestatement,Ihope,asfranklyasitismade。”
  Shenodded。Hereyeswerefulloftears,butshedidnothesitatetoraisethem。Shehadthegreatestdesiretoseethefaceofthemanwhocouldspeaklikethisto-day,andyetofwhoseprideandsenseofsuperiorityhisdaughterhadstoodinsuchawe,thatshehadlaidasealupontheimpulsesofherheart,andimposedsuchtasksandwearywaitinguponherlover。Dorisforgot,inmeetinghissoftenedglanceandtender,almostwistful,expression,thechangeswhichcanbemadebyagreatgrief,andonlywonderedwhyhersweetbenefactresshadnottakenhimintoherconfidenceandthus,possibly,avertedthedoomwhichDorisfelthadinsomewaygrownoutofthissecrecy。”Whyshouldshehavefearedthedisapprovalofthisman?”sheinwardlyqueried,asshecasthimaconfidinglookwhichpleasedhimgreatly,ashistonenowshowed。”WhenIlostmydaughter,Ilosteverything,”hedeclared,astheywalkedslowlyuptheroad。”Nothingexcitesmyinterest,savethatwhichonceexcitedhers。Iamtoldthatthedeepestinterestofherlifelayhere。Iamalsotoldthatitwasaninterestquiteworthyofher。Iexpecttofinditso。Ihopewithallmyhearttofinditso,andthatiswhyIhavecometothistownandexpecttolingertillMr。Brothersonhasrecoveredsufficientlytoseeme。
  Ihopethatthiswillbeagreeabletohim。IhopethatIamnotpresumingtoomuchincherishingtheseexpectations。
  Doristurnedhercandideyesuponhim。”Icannottell;Idonotknow,”saidshe。”Nobodyknows,noteventhedoctor,whateffectthenewswesodreadtogivehimwillhaveuponMr。Brotherson。Youwillhavetowait-weallshallhavetowaittheresultsofthatrevelation。Itcannotbekeptfromhimmuchlonger。WhenIreturn,Ishallshrinkfromhisfirstlook,inthefearofseeingitbetraythisdreadfulknowledge。YetIhaveafaithfulwomantheretokeepeveryoneoutofhisroom。””Youhavehadmuchtocarryforonesoyoung,”wasMr。Challoner’ssympatheticremark。”Youmustletmehelpyouwhenthatawfulmomentcomes。IamatthehotelandshallstaytheretillMr。
  Brothersonispronouncedquitewell。Ihavenootherdutynowinlifebuttosustainhimthroughhistroubleandthen,withwhataidhecangive,searchoutandfindthecauseofmydaughter’sdeathwhichIwillneveradmitwithoutthefullestproof,tohavebeenoneofsuicide。”
  Doristrembled。”Itwasnotsuicide,”shedeclared,vehemently。”Ihavealwaysfeltsurethatitwasnot;butto-dayIKNOW。”
  Herhandfellclenchedonherbreastandhereyesgleamedstrangely。
  Mr。Challonerwashimselfgreatlystartled。Whathadhappened-whatcouldhavehappenedsinceyesterdaythatsheshouldemphasisethatnow?”I’venottoldanyone,”shewenton,ashestoppedshortintheroad,inhisanxietytounderstandher。”ButIwilltellyou。
  Only,nothere,notwithallthesepeopledrivingpast;mostofwhomknowme。Cometothehouselater-thisevening,afterMr。
  Brotherson’sroomisclosedforthenight。Ihavealittlesitting-roomontheothersideofthehallwherewecantalkwithoutbeingheard。Wouldyouobjecttodoingthat?AmIaskingtoomuchofyou?””No,notatall,”heassuredher。”Expectmeateight。Willthatbetooearly?””No,no。Oh,howthosepeoplestared!Letushastenbackortheymayconnectyournamewithwhatwewantkeptsecret。”
  Hesmiledatherfears,butgaveintoherhumour;hewouldseehersoonagainandpossiblylearnsomethingwhichwouldamplyrepayhim,bothforhistroubleandhispatience。
  Butwheneveningcameandsheturnedtofacehiminthatlittlesitting-roomwherehehadquietlyfollowedher,hewasconsciousofachangeinhermannerwhichforbadethesehighhopes。Thegleamwasgonefromhereyes;thetremulouseagernessfromhermobileandsensitivemouth。Shehadbeenthinkinginthehourswhichhadpassed,andhadlosttheconfidenceofthatoneimpetuousmoment。
  Hergreetingbetrayedembarrassmentandshehesitatedpainfullybeforeshespoke。”Idon’tknowwhatyouwillthinkofme,”sheventuredatlast,motioningtoachairbutnotsittingherself。”YouhavehadtimetothinkoverwhatIsaidandprobablyexpectsomethingreal,-some-thingyoucouldtellpeople。Butitisn’tlikethat。
  It’safeeling-abelief。I’msosure-””Sureofwhat,MissScott?”
  Shegaveaglanceatthedoorbeforesteppingupnearer。Hehadnottakenthechairshepreferred。”SurethatIhaveseenthefaceofthemanwhomurderedher。Itwasinadream,”shewhisperinglycompleted,hergreateyesmistywithawe。”Adream,MissScott?”Hetriedtohidehisdisappointment。”Yes;Iknewthatitwouldsoundfoolishtoyou;itsoundsfoolishtome。Butlisten,sir。ListentowhatIhavetotellandthenyoucanjudge。Iwasverymuchagitatedyesterday。IhadtowritealetteratMr。Brotherson’sdictation-alettertoher。
  YoucanunderstandmyhorrorandtheeffortImadetohidemyemotion。Iwasquiteunnerved。Icouldnotsleeptillmorning,andthen-andthen-Isaw-IhopeIcandescribeit。”
  Graspingatanear-bychair,sheleanedonitforsupport,closinghereyestoallbutthatinnervision。Abreathlessmomentfollowed,thenshemurmuredinstrainedtnonotonoustones:”Iseeitagain-justasIsawitintheearlymorning-butevenmoreplainly,ifthatispossible。Ahall-Ishouldcallitahall,thoughIdon’trememberseeinganyplacelikeitbefore,withalittlestaircaseattheside,upwhichtherecomesaman,whostopsjustatthetopandlooksintentlymyway。Thereisfiercenessinhisface-alookwhichmeansnogoodtoanybody-andashishandgoestohisovercoatpocket,drawingoutsomethingwhichIcannotdescribe,butwhichhehandlesasifitwereapistol,Ifeelahorriblefear,and-and-”Thechildwasstaggering,andthehandwhichwasfreehadsoughtherheartwhereitlayclenched,theknucklesshowingwhiteinthedimlight。
  Mr。Challonerwatchedherwithdilatedeyes,thespellunderwhichshespokefallinginsomedegreeuponhim。Hadshefinished?Wasthisall?No;sheisspeakingagain,butverylow,almostinawhisper。”Thereismusic-acrash-butIplainlyseehisotherhandapproachtheobjectheisholding。Hetakessomethingfromtheend-theobjectispointedmyway-Iamlookinginto-into-what?Idonotknow。Icannotevenseehimnow。Thespacewherehestoodisempty。Everythingfades,andIwakewithaloudcryinmyearsandasenseofdeathhere。”Shehadliftedherhandandstruckatherheart,openinghereyesasshedidso。”YetitwasnotIwhohadbeenshot,”sheaddedsoftly。
  Mr。Challonershuddered。Thiswaslikethereopeningofhisdaughter’sgrave。Buthehadentereduponthescenewithafullappreciationoftheordealawaitinghimandhedidnotlosehiscalmness,orthecontrolofhisjudgment。