“Well，gentlemen，“saidtherain-maker，“I’mpackedup，andmytrain’llbealongsoon——wouldhavebeenalongbythis，onlyit’slate。What’sthewordastomythreehundredandfiftydollars？“
　　Evenstilltherewereobjectionsexpressed。Hehadnotentirelyperformedhissideofthecontract。
　　“Ithinkdifferent，gentlemen，“saidhe。“ButI’llunpackandletthattraingo。Ican’thavethelawonyou，Isuppose。Butifyoudon’tpayme“therain-makerputhishandsinhispocketsandleanedagainstthefence“I’llfloodyourtown。“
　　Inearthquakesanderuptionspeopleendbyexpectinganything；andinthetotaleclipsethatwasnowoverallCheyenne’sordinarystandardsandprecedentsthebewilderedcommunitysawinthisthreatnothingmoreunusualthanifhehadsaidtwicetwomadefour。Thepursewashandedover。
　　“I’mobliged，“saidHilbrun，simply。
　　“IfIhadforeseen，gentlemen，“saidJode，toodeeplygrievednowtofeelanger，“thatIwouldevenbeindirectlyassociatedwithyourlosingyourmoneythroughthis——thisabsurdoccurrence，Iwouldhavedeclinedtohelpyou。Itbecomesmyduty，“hecontinued，turningcoldlytotheinebriatedLusk，“tohandthistoyou，sir。“Andtheassistantlurchinglystuffedhisstakesaway。
　　“It’sworthit，“saidLin。“He’swelcometomycash。“
　　“What’sthatyousay，LinMcLean？“Itwasthebiscuit-shooter，andshesurgedtothefront。
　　“I’mbroke。He’sgotit。That’sall，“saidLin，briefly。
　　“Broke!You!“Sheglaredatherathleticyounglord，andsheutteredapreliminaryhowl。
　　Atthatlong-lostcryLuskturnedhissillyface。“It’smydarlingKate，“
　　hesaid。“Why，Kate!“
　　ThenextthingthatIknewOgdenandIweregrapplingwithLinMcLean；
　　foreverythinghadhappenedatonce。Thebridehadswoopeduponherfirstweddedloveandburstintotearsontheman’sneck，whichLinwastryingtobreakinconsequence。Wedonotalwaysrecognizeourbenefactorsatsight。Theyallcametotheground，andwehauledthesecondhusbandoff。
　　TheladyandLuskremainedinaheap，hefoolish，tearful，andaffectionate；sheturnedfuriouslyatbay，hisguardianangel，indifferenttotheonlookingcrowd，andhurlingrighteousdefianceatLin。“Don’tyusdarelayyerfingeronmyhusband，yousage-brushbigamist!“iswhatthemarvelousfemalesaid。
　　“Bigamist？“repeatedLin，dazedatthischarge。“Iain’t，“hesaidtoOgdenandme。“Ineverdid。I’venevermarriedanyof’embeforeher。“
　　“Littlegoodthat’lldoyus，LinMcLean!MeandhimwasmanandwifebeforeeverIcomeacrosstyus。“
　　“Youandhim？“murmuredthepuncher。
　　“Herandme，“whimperedLusk。“Sidney。“Hesatupwithalimp，confidingstareateverybody。
　　“Sidneywho？“saidLin。
　　“No，no，“correctedLusk，crossly——“Sidney，Nebraska。“
　　Thestakesatthispointfellfromhispocketwhichhedidnotnotice。
　　Butthebridehadtheminsafe-keepingatonce。
　　“Whoareyu’，anyway——whenyu’ain’tdrunk？“demandedLin。
　　“He’sasgoodamanasyou，andbetter，“snortedtheguardianangel。
　　“Givehimapistol，andhe’llmakeyouhardtofind。“
　　“Well，youlistentome，SidneyNebraska——“Linbegan。
　　“No，no，“correctedLuskoncemore，asadistantwhistleblew——“Jim。“
　　“Good-bye，gentlemen，“saidtherain-maker。“That’sthewest-bound。I’mperfectlysatisfiedwithmyexperimenthere，andI’mofftorepeatitatSaltLakeCity。“
　　“Youare？“shoutedLinMcLean。“HimandJim’sgoingtoworkitagain!Forgoodness’sake，somebodylendmetwenty-fivedollars!“
　　Atthistherewasaninstantaneousrush。Tenminuteslater，infrontoftheticket-windowstherewasalineofcitizensbuyingticketsforSaltLakeasifithadbeenMadameBernhardt。Somerockhadbeensmitten，andreadymoneyhadflowedforth。TheGovernorsawusoff，sadthathisdutiesshoulddetainhim。ButJodewent!
　　“Bettingisthefool’sargument，gentlemen，“saidhetoOgden，McLean，andme，“andit’sawearytimesinceIhavehadthepleasure。“
　　“Whichwayareyu’bettin’？“Linasked。
　　“Withmyprinciples，sir，“answeredthelittlesignal-serviceofficer。
　　“IexpectIain’tgotany，“saidthepuncher。“It’sJimI’mbackin’thistime。“
　　“Seehere，“saidI；“Iwanttotalktoyou。“Wewentintoanothercar，andIdid。
　　“Andsoyu’knowedaboutLuskwhenwewasonthemboardwalks？“thepunchersaid。
　　“DoyoumeanIoughttohave——“
　　“Shucks!no。Yu’couldn’t。Nobodycouldn’t。It’saqueerworld，allthesame。Yu’havegoodfriends，andallthat。“Helookedoutofthewindow。“
　　Laramiealready!“hecommented，andgotoutandwalkedbyhimselfontheplatformuntilwehadstartedagain。“Yu’havegoodfriends，“hepursued，settlinghimselfsohislonglegswerestretchedandcomfortable，“andtheytellyu’things，andyoutellthemthings。Andwhenitdon’tmakenoparticularmatteronewayortheother，yu’give’emyourhonestopinionandtalkstraightto’em，andthey’llcometoyouthesameway。Sothatwhenyu’reridin’therangealonesometimes，andthinkin’aloto’thingsoverontopmaybeofsomedog-gonedhill，you’llsaytoyourselfaboutsomefellowyu’knowmightywell，’There’samanisagoodfriendofmine。’Andyu’meanit。Andit’sso。Yetwhenmattersisserious，asoncedinawhilethey’reboundtoget，andyu’reinaplumbhole，whereisthemanthen——yourgoodfriend？Why，he’swhereyu’wanthimtobe。
　　Standin’off，keepin’hismouthshut，andlettin’yu’findyourowntrailout。Ifhetriedtoshowittoyu’，yu’dlikelyhithim。Butshucks!
　　Circumstanceshaveshowedmethetrailthistime，youbet!“Andthepuncher’sface，whichhadbeensombre，grewlively，andhelaidafriendlyhandonmyknee。
　　“Thetrail’sprettysimple，“saidI。
　　“Youbet!Butit’ssureaqueerworld。Tellyu’，“saidLin，withtheairofhavingmadeadiscovery，“whenamangetsdowntobed-rockaffairsinthislifehe’sgottodohistravellin’alone，sameashedoeshisdyin’。
　　Iexpectevenmarriedmenhasthoughtsandhopestheydon’ttelltheirwives。“
　　“Neverwasmarried，“saidI。
　　“Well——nomorewasI。Let’sgotobed。“AndLinshookmyhand，andgavemeasingular，rathermelancholysmile。
　　AtSaltLakeCity，whichOgdenwasgladtoincludeinhisWesternholiday，wefoundbothMormonandGentilereadytogiveusoddsagainstrain——onlyInoticedthatthoseofthetruefaithwerelessfree。Indeed；
　　theMormon，theQuaker，andmostsectsofanisolateddoctrinehaveaniceprudenceinmoney。Duringourbriefstaywevisitedthesights：
　　floatinginthelake，listeningtopinsdropinthegalleryoftheTabernacle，seeingfrescosofsaintsinrobesspeakingfromheaventoJosephSmithintheSundayclothesofamodernfarm-hand，andinthestreetweheardatadistanceastrenuousdomestictalkbetweenthenew——
　　orperhapsIshouldsaytheoriginal——husbandandwife。
　　“She’scorralledSidney’scash!“saidthedelightedLin。“Hecan’tbetnothingonthisshower“
　　Andthen，afterall，thistime——itdidn’train!
　　Strippedofmoneybothways，Cheyenne，havingmostfortunatelypurchasedareturnticket，soughtitshome。Theperplexedrain-makerwentsomewhereelse，withouthisassistant。Lusk’sexultingwife，havingthemoney，retainedhimwithher。
　　“Goodlucktoyu’，Sidney!“saidLin，speakingtohimforthefirsttimesinceCheyenne。“IfeelaheapbettersinceI’vesawyu’married。“Hepaidnoattentiontothebiscuit-shooter，orthehorriblelanguagethatshethrewafterhim。
　　Jodealsofelt“aheapbetter。“Legitimatesciencehadtriumphed。To-day，mostofCheyennebelieveswithJodethatitwasallacoincidence。SouthCarolinahadbetonherprinciples，andwonfromLinthefewdollarsthatIhadlentthepuncher。
　　“Andwhatwillyoudonow？“IsaidtoLin。
　　“Jointhebeefround-up。Balaam’spayin’fortydollars。Iguessthat’llkeepasingleman。“
　　AJOURNEYINSEARCHOFCHRISTMAS
　　TheGovernordescendedthestepsoftheCapitolslowlyandwithpauses，liftingalistfrequentlytohiseye。Hehadintermittentlypencilleditbetweenstagesoftheforenoon’spublicbusiness，andhisgaitgrewabsentasherecurrednowtohisjottingsintheiraccumulation，withaslightpainattheirnumber，andthedefinitefearthattheywouldbemoreinseasonstocome。Theywerethenamesofhisfriends’childrentowhomhisexcellentheartmovedhimtogiveChristmaspresents。Hehadputoffthisregeneratingeviluntilthelatestday，aswashiscustom，andnowhewassettingforthtodothewholethingatablow，entirelyplanlessamongthegunsandrocking-horsesthatwouldpresentlysurroundhim。Ashereachedthehighwayheheardhimselffamiliarlyaddressedfromadistance，and，turning，sawfoursonsofthealkalijoggingintotownfromtheplain。Onewhohadshoutedtohimgallopedoutfromtheothers，roundedtheCapitol’senclosure，and，approachingwithradiantcountenanceleanedtoreachthehandoftheGovernor，andonceagaingreetedhimwithahilarious“Hello，Doc!“
　　GovernorBarker，M。D。，seeingMr。McLeanunexpectedlyafterseveralyears，hailedthehorsemanwithfrankandlivelypleasure，and，inquiringwhomightbetheotherridersbehind，wastoldthattheywereShorty，Chalkeye，andDollarBill，comeforChristmas。“Anddandiestohittownwith，“Mr。McLeanadded。“Red-hot。“
　　“Iamacquaintedwiththem，“assentedhisExcellency。
　　“We’vebeenridin’trailfortwelveweeks，“thecow-punchercontinued，“makin’ourbedsdownanywheres，andeatin’thesameoldchuckeveryday。
　　Sowe’veshookfriedbeefandheifer’sdelight，andwe’regoin’tofeedhigh。“
　　ThenMr。McLeanoverflowedwithtalkandpungentconfidences，fortheholidaysalreadyriotedinhisspirit，andhistonguewasloosedovertheircomingrites。
　　“We’vesouredonscenery，“hefinished，inhisdrasticidiom。“We’resickofmoonlightandcow-dung，andwe’reheeledforabigtime。“
　　“Callonme，“remarkedtheGovernor，cheerily，“whenyou’rereadyforbromidesandsulphates。“
　　“Iain’tbox-headednomore，“protestedMr。McLean；“I’vegotmaturity，Doc，sinceIseenyu’attherain-making，andI’maheapolderthanthemhospitaldayswhenIbustmylegonyu’。Threeorfourglassesandquit。
　　That’smyrule。“
　　“Thatyourrule，too？“inquiredtheGovernorofShorty，Chalkeye，andDollarBill。Thesegentlemenofthesaddleweresittingquiteexpressionlessupontheirhorses。
　　“Weain’ttalkin’，we’rewaitin’，“observedChalkeye；andthethreecynicssmiledamiably。
　　“Well，Doc，seeyu’again，“saidMr。McLean。Heturnedtoaccompanyhisbrothercow-punchers，butinthatparticularmomentFatedescendedorcameupfromwhateverplaceshedwellsinandenteredthebodyoftheunsuspectingGovernor。
　　“What’syourhurry？“saidFate，speakingintheofficial’sheartymanner。
　　“Comealongwithme。“
　　“Can’tdoit。Whereareyu’goin’？“
　　“Christmasing，“repliedFate。
　　“Well，I’vegottofeedmyhorse。Christmasing，yu’say？“
　　“Yes；I’mbuyingtoys。“
　　“Toys!You？Whatfor？“
　　“Oh，somekids。“
　　“Yourn？“screechedLin，precipitately。
　　HisExcellencythejovialGovernoropenedhisteethinpleasureatthis，forhewasabachelor，andtherewerefifteenuponhislist，whichheheldupfortheedificationofthehastyMcLean。“Notmine，I’mhappytosay。Myfriendskeepmarryingandsettling，andtheirkidscallmeuncle，andclimbaroundandbother，andIforgettheirnames，andthinkit’sagirl，andthemothergetsmad。Why，ifIdidn’tremembertheselittlefolksatChristmasthey’dbewondering——notthekids，theyjustbreakyourtoysanddon’tnotice；butthemotherwouldwonder——’What’sthematterwithDr。Barker？HasGovernorBarkergonebackonus？’——that’swherethestraincomes!“hebrokeoff，facingMr。McLeanwithanotherspaciouslaugh。