“Themindwhichdoesnotstruggleagainstitselfunder_one_circumstance,wouldfindobjectstodistractitinthe_other_,Ibelieve;andtheinfluenceoftheplaceandofexamplemayoftenrousebetterfeelingsthanarebegunwith。Thegreaterlengthoftheservice,however,Iadmittobesometimestoohardastretchuponthemind。
Onewishesitwerenotso;butIhavenotyetleftOxfordlongenoughtoforgetwhatchapelprayersare。“
Whilethiswaspassing,therestofthepartybeingscatteredaboutthechapel,JuliacalledMr。Crawford’sattentiontohersister,bysaying,“DolookatMr。RushworthandMaria,standingsidebyside,exactlyasiftheceremonyweregoingtobeperformed。Havenottheycompletelytheairofit?“
Mr。Crawfordsmiledhisacquiescence,andsteppingforwardtoMaria,said,inavoicewhichsheonlycouldhear,“IdonotliketoseeMissBertramsonearthealtar。“
Starting,theladyinstinctivelymovedasteportwo,butrecoveringherselfinamoment,affectedtolaugh,andaskedhim,inatonenotmuchlouder,“Ifhewouldgiveheraway?“
“IamafraidIshoulddoitveryawkwardly,“washisreply,withalookofmeaning。
Julia,joiningthematthemoment,carriedonthejoke。
“Uponmyword,itisreallyapitythatitshouldnottakeplacedirectly,ifwehadbutaproperlicence,forherewearealtogether,andnothingintheworldcouldbemoresnugandpleasant。“AndshetalkedandlaughedaboutitwithsolittlecautionastocatchthecomprehensionofMr。Rushworthandhismother,andexposehersistertothewhisperedgallantriesofherlover,whileMrs。Rushworthspokewithpropersmilesanddignityofitsbeingamosthappyeventtoherwheneverittookplace。
“IfEdmundwerebutinorders!“criedJulia,andrunningtowherehestoodwithMissCrawfordandFanny:
“MydearEdmund,ifyouwerebutinordersnow,youmightperformtheceremonydirectly。Howunluckythatyouarenotordained;Mr。RushworthandMariaarequiteready。“
MissCrawford’scountenance,asJuliaspoke,mighthaveamusedadisinterestedobserver。Shelookedalmostaghastunderthenewideashewasreceiving。Fannypitiedher。
“Howdistressedshewillbeatwhatshesaidjustnow,“
passedacrosshermind。
“Ordained!“saidMissCrawford;“what,areyoutobeaclergyman?“
“Yes;Ishalltakeorderssoonaftermyfather’sreturn——
probablyatChristmas。“
MissCrawford,rallyingherspirits,andrecoveringhercomplexion,repliedonly,“IfIhadknownthisbefore,Iwouldhavespokenoftheclothwithmorerespect,“
andturnedthesubject。
Thechapelwassoonafterwardslefttothesilenceandstillnesswhichreignedinit,withfewinterruptions,throughouttheyear。
MissBertram,displeasedwithhersister,ledtheway,andallseemedtofeelthattheyhadbeentherelongenough。
Thelowerpartofthehousehadbeennowentirelyshewn,andMrs。Rushworth,neverwearyinthecause,wouldhaveproceededtowardstheprincipalstaircase,andtakenthemthroughalltheroomsabove,ifhersonhadnotinterposedwithadoubtoftherebeingtimeenough。
“Forif,“saidhe,withthesortofself-evidentpropositionwhichmanyaclearerheaddoesnotalwaysavoid,“weare_too_longgoingoverthehouse,weshallnothavetimeforwhatistobedoneoutofdoors。Itispasttwo,andwearetodineatfive。“
Mrs。Rushworthsubmitted;andthequestionofsurveyingthegrounds,withthewhoandthehow,waslikelytobemorefullyagitated,andMrs。Norriswasbeginningtoarrangebywhatjunctionofcarriagesandhorsesmostcouldbedone,whentheyoungpeople,meetingwithanoutwarddoor,temptinglyopenonaflightofstepswhichledimmediatelytoturfandshrubs,andallthesweetsofpleasure-grounds,asbyoneimpulse,onewishforairandliberty,allwalkedout。
“Supposeweturndownhereforthepresent,“saidMrs。Rushworth,civillytakingthehintandfollowingthem。“Herearethegreatestnumberofourplants,andherearethecuriouspheasants。“
“Query,“saidMr。Crawford,lookingroundhim,“whetherwemaynotfindsomethingtoemployusherebeforewegofarther?Iseewallsofgreatpromise。
Mr。Rushworth,shallwesummonacouncilonthislawn?“
“James,“saidMrs。Rushworthtoherson,“Ibelievethewildernesswillbenewtoalltheparty。TheMissBertramshaveneverseenthewildernessyet。“
Noobjectionwasmade,butforsometimethereseemednoinclinationtomoveinanyplan,ortoanydistance。
Allwereattractedatfirstbytheplantsorthepheasants,andalldispersedaboutinhappyindependence。
Mr。Crawfordwasthefirsttomoveforwardtoexaminethecapabilitiesofthatendofthehouse。Thelawn,boundedoneachsidebyahighwall,containedbeyondthefirstplantedareaabowling-green,andbeyondthebowling-greenalongterracewalk,backedbyironpalisades,andcommandingaviewoverthemintothetopsofthetreesofthewildernessimmediatelyadjoining。
Itwasagoodspotforfault-finding。Mr。CrawfordwassoonfollowedbyMissBertramandMr。Rushworth;andwhen,afteralittletime,theothersbegantoformintoparties,thesethreewerefoundinbusyconsultationontheterracebyEdmund,MissCrawford,andFanny,whoseemedasnaturallytounite,andwho,afterashortparticipationoftheirregretsanddifficulties,leftthemandwalkedon。
Theremainingthree,Mrs。Rushworth,Mrs。Norris,andJulia,werestillfarbehind;forJulia,whosehappystarnolongerprevailed,wasobligedtokeepbythesideofMrs。Rushworth,andrestrainherimpatientfeettothatlady’sslowpace,whileheraunt,havingfalleninwiththehousekeeper,whowascomeouttofeedthepheasants,waslingeringbehindingossipwithher。PoorJulia,theonlyoneoutoftheninenottolerablysatisfiedwiththeirlot,wasnowinastateofcompletepenance,andasdifferentfromtheJuliaofthebarouche-boxascouldwellbeimagined。Thepolitenesswhichshehadbeenbroughtuptopractiseasadutymadeitimpossibleforhertoescape;whilethewantofthathigherspeciesofself-command,thatjustconsiderationofothers,thatknowledgeofherownheart,thatprincipleofright,whichhadnotformedanyessentialpartofhereducation,madehermiserableunderit。
“Thisisinsufferablyhot,“saidMissCrawford,whentheyhadtakenoneturnontheterrace,andweredrawingasecondtimetothedoorinthemiddlewhichopenedtothewilderness。“Shallanyofusobjecttobeingcomfortable?
Hereisanicelittlewood,ifonecanbutgetintoit。
Whathappinessifthedoorshouldnotbelocked!butofcourseitis;forinthesegreatplacesthegardenersaretheonlypeoplewhocangowheretheylike。“
Thedoor,however,provednottobelocked,andtheywereallagreedinturningjoyfullythroughit,andleavingtheunmitigatedglareofdaybehind。Aconsiderableflightofstepslandedtheminthewilderness,whichwasaplantedwoodofabouttwoacres,andthoughchieflyoflarchandlaurel,andbeechcutdown,andthoughlaidoutwithtoomuchregularity,wasdarknessandshade,andnaturalbeauty,comparedwiththebowling-greenandtheterrace。Theyallfelttherefreshmentofit,andforsometimecouldonlywalkandadmire。Atlength,afterashortpause,MissCrawfordbeganwith,“Soyouaretobeaclergyman,Mr。Bertram。Thisisratherasurprisetome。“
“Whyshoulditsurpriseyou?Youmustsupposemedesignedforsomeprofession,andmightperceivethatIamneitheralawyer,norasoldier,norasailor。“
“Verytrue;but,inshort,ithadnotoccurredtome。
Andyouknowthereisgenerallyanuncleoragrandfathertoleaveafortunetothesecondson。“
“Averypraiseworthypractice,“saidEdmund,“butnotquiteuniversal。Iamoneoftheexceptions,and_being_one,mustdosomethingformyself。“
“’Butwhyareyoutobeaclergyman?Ithought_that_
wasalwaysthelotoftheyoungest,wherethereweremanytochusebeforehim。“
“Doyouthinkthechurchitselfneverchosen,then?“
“_Never_isablackword。Butyes,inthe_never_
ofconversation,whichmeans_not__very__often_,Idothinkit。Forwhatistobedoneinthechurch?
Menlovetodistinguishthemselves,andineitheroftheotherlinesdistinctionmaybegained,butnotinthechurch。
Aclergymanisnothing。“
“The_nothing_ofconversationhasitsgradations,Ihope,aswellasthe_never_。Aclergymancannotbehighinstateorfashion。Hemustnotheadmobs,orsetthetonindress。ButIcannotcallthatsituationnothingwhichhasthechargeofallthatisofthefirstimportancetomankind,individuallyorcollectivelyconsidered,temporallyandeternally,whichhastheguardianshipofreligionandmorals,andconsequentlyofthemannerswhichresultfromtheirinfluence。Nooneherecancallthe_office_nothing。Ifthemanwhoholdsitisso,itisbytheneglectofhisduty,byforegoingitsjustimportance,andsteppingoutofhisplacetoappearwhatheoughtnottoappear。“
“_You_assigngreaterconsequencetotheclergymanthanonehasbeenusedtoheargiven,orthanIcanquitecomprehend。
第18章