EP1CH14
CHAPTERXIV
Soonafterthisthechildrencameintosaygoodnight。Theykissedeveryone，thetutorsandgovernessesmadetheirbows，andtheywentout。OnlyyoungNicholasandhistutorremained。Dessalleswhisperedtotheboytocomedownstairs。
"No，MonsieurDessalles，Iwillaskmyaunttoletmestay，"repliedNicholasBolkonskialsoinawhisper。
"Matante，pleaseletmestay，"saidhe，goinguptohisaunt。
Hisfaceexpressedentreaty，agitation，andecstasy。CountessMaryglancedathimandturnedtoPierre。
"Whenyouareherehecan’ttearhimselfaway，"shesaid。
"Iwillbringhimtoyoudirectly，MonsieurDessalles。Goodnight！"saidPierre，givinghishandtotheSwisstutor，andheturnedtoyoungNicholaswithasmile。"YouandIhaven’tseenanythingofoneanotheryet……Howlikeheisgrowing，Mary！"headded，addressingCountessMary。
"Likemyfather？"askedtheboy，flushingcrimsonandlookingupatPierrewithbright，ecstaticeyes。
Pierrenodded，andwentonwithwhathehadbeensayingwhenthechildrenhadinterrupted。CountessMarysatdowndoingwoolwork；
Natashadidnottakehereyesoffherhusband。NicholasandDenisovrose，askedfortheirpipes，smoked，wenttofetchmoreteafromSonya—whosatwearybutresoluteatthesamovar—andquestionedPierre。Thecurly—headed，delicateboysatwithshiningeyesunnoticedinacorner，startingeverynowandthenandmutteringsomethingtohimself，andevidentlyexperiencinganewandpowerfulemotionasheturnedhiscurlyhead，withhisthinneckexposedbyhisturn—downcollar，towardtheplacewherePierresat。
Theconversationturnedonthecontemporarygossipaboutthoseinpower，inwhichmostpeopleseethechiefinterestofhomepolitics。
Denisov，dissatisfiedwiththegovernmentonaccountofhisowndisappointmentsintheservice，heardwithpleasureofthethingsdoneinPetersburgwhichseemedtohimstupid，andmadeforcibleandsharpcommentsonwhatPierretoldthem。
"OneusedtohavetobeaGerman—nowonemustdancewithTatawinovaandMadameKwudener，andweadEcka’tshausenandthebwethwen。Oh，theyshouldletthatfinefellowBonapartelose—he’dknockallthisnonsenseoutofthem！FancygivingthecommandoftheSemenovwegimenttoafellowlikethatSchwa’tz！"hecried。
Nicholas，thoughfreefromDenisov’sreadinesstofindfaultwitheverything，alsothoughtthatdiscussionofthegovernmentwasaveryseriousandweightymatter，andthefactthatAhadbeenappointedMinisterofThisandBGovernorGeneralofThat，andthattheEmperorhadsaidso—and—soandthisministerso—and—so，seemedtohimveryimportant。AndsohethoughtitnecessarytotakeaninterestinthesethingsandtoquestionPierre。Thequestionsputbythesetwokepttheconversationfromchangingitsordinarycharacterofgossipaboutthehighergovernmentcircles。
ButNatasha，knowingallherhusband’swaysandideas，sawthathehadlongbeenwishingbuthadbeenunabletodiverttheconversationtoanotherchannelandexpresshisowndeeplyfeltideaforthesakeofwhichhehadgonetoPetersburgtoconsultwithhisnewfriendPrinceTheodore，andshehelpedhimbyaskinghowhisaffairswithPrinceTheodorehadgone。
"Whatwasitabout？"askedNicholas。
"Alwaysthesamething，"saidPierre，lookingroundathislisteners。"Everybodyseesthatthingsaregoingsobadlythattheycannotbeallowedtogoonsoandthatitisthedutyofalldecentmentocounteractitasfarastheycan。"
"Whatcandecentmendo？"Nicholasinquired，frowningslightly。
"Whatcanbedone？"
"Why，this……"
"Comeintomystudy，"saidNicholas。
Natasha，whohadlongexpectedtobefetchedtonurseherbaby，nowheardthenursecallingherandwenttothenursery。CountessMaryfollowedher。ThemenwentintothestudyandlittleNicholasBolkonskifollowedthemunnoticedbyhisuncleandsatdownatthewritingtableinashadycornerbythewindow。
"Well，whatwouldyoudo？"askedDenisov。
"Alwayssomefantasticschemes，"saidNicholas。
"Whythis，"beganPierre，notsittingdownbutpacingtheroom，sometimesstoppingshort，gesticulating，andlisping："thepositioninPetersburgisthis：theEmperordoesnotlookintoanything。Hehasabandonedhimselfaltogethertothismysticism"Pierrecouldnottoleratemysticisminanyonenow。"Heseeksonlyforpeace，andonlythesepeoplesansfoiniloi*cangiveithim—peoplewhorecklesslyhackatandstrangleeverything—Magnitski，Arakcheev，andtuttiquanti……Youwillagreethatifyoudidnotlookafteryourestatesyourselfbutonlywantedaquietlife，theharsheryourstewardwasthemorereadilyyourobjectmightbeattained，"hesaidtoNicholas。
*Withoutfaithorlaw。
"Well，whatdoesthatleadupto？"saidNicholas。
"Well，everythingisgoingtoruin！Robberyinthelawcourts，inthearmynothingbutflogging，drilling，andMilitarySettlements；thepeoplearetortured，enlightenmentissuppressed。Allthatisyoungandhonestiscrushed！Everyoneseesthatthiscannotgoon。
Everythingisstrainedtosuchadegreethatitwillcertainlybreak，"
saidPierreasthosewhoexaminetheactionsofanygovernmenthavealwayssaidsincegovernmentsbegan。"ItoldthemjustonethinginPetersburg。"
"Toldwhom？"
"Well，youknowwhom，"saidPierre，withameaningglancefromunderhisbrows。"PrinceTheodoreandallthose。Toencouragecultureandphilanthropyisallverywellofcourse。Theaimisexcellentbutinthepresentcircumstancessomethingelseisneeded。"
AtthatmomentNicholasnoticedthepresenceofhisnephew。Hisfacedarkenedandhewentuptotheboy。
"Whyareyouhere？"
"Why？Lethimbe，"saidPierre，takingNicholasbythearmandcontinuing。"Thatisnotenough，Itoldthem。Somethingelseisneeded。Whenyoustandexpectingtheoverstrainedstringtosnapatanymoment，wheneveryoneisexpectingtheinevitablecatastrophe，asmanyaspossiblemustjoinhandsascloselyastheycantowithstandthegeneralcalamity。Everythingthatisyoungandstrongisbeingenticedawayanddepraved。Oneisluredbywomen，anotherbyhonors，athirdbyambitionormoney，andtheygoovertothatcamp。
Noindependentmen，suchasyouorI，areleft。WhatIsayiswidenthescopeofoursociety，letthemotd’ordrebenotvirtuealonebutindependenceandactionaswell！"
Nicholas，whohadlefthisnephew，irritablypushedupanarmchair，satdowninit，andlistenedtoPierre，coughingdiscontentedlyandfrowningmoreandmore。
"Butactionwithwhataim？"hecried。"Andwhatpositionwillyouadopttowardthegovernment？"
"Why，thepositionofassistants。Thesocietyneednotbesecretifthegovernmentallowsit。Notmerelyisitnothostiletogovernment，butitisasocietyoftrueconservatives—asocietyofgentlemeninthefullmeaningofthatword。ItisonlytopreventsomePugachevorotherfromkillingmychildrenandyours，andArakcheevfromsendingmeofftosomeMilitarySettlement。Wejoinhandsonlyforthepublicwelfareandthegeneralsafety。"
"Yes，butit’sasecretsocietyandthereforeahostileandharmfulonewhichcanonlycauseharm。"
"Why？DidtheTugendbundwhichsavedEurope"theydidnotthenventuretosuggestthatRussiahadsavedEurope"doanyharm？TheTugendbundisanallianceofvirtue：itislove，mutualhelp……itiswhatChristpreachedontheCross。"
Natasha，whohadcomeinduringtheconversation，lookedjoyfullyatherhusband。Itwasnotwhathewassayingthatpleasedher—thatdidnoteveninteresther，foritseemedtoherthatwasallextremelysimpleandthatshehadknownitalongtimeitseemedsotoherbecausesheknewthatitsprangfromPierre’swholesoul，butitwashisanimatedandenthusiasticappearancethatmadeherglad。
Theboywiththethinneckstretchingoutfromtheturn—downcollar—
whomeveryonehadforgotten—gazedatPierrewithevengreaterandmorerapturousjoy。EverywordofPierre’sburnedintohisheart，andwithanervousmovementofhisfingersheunconsciouslybrokethesealingwaxandquillpenshishandscameupononhisuncle’stable。
"Itisnotatallwhatyousuppose；butthatiswhattheGermanTugendbundwas，andwhatIamproposing。"
"No，myfwiend！TheTugendbundisallvewywellforthesausageeaters，butIdon’tunderstanditandcan’tevenpwonounceit，"
interposedDenisovinaloudandresolutevoice。"Iagweethatevewythinghereiswottenandhowwible，buttheTugendbundIdon’tunderstand。Ifwe’renotsatisfied，letushaveabuntofourown。
That’sallwight。Jesuisvot’ehomme！"*
*"I’myourman。"
Pierresmiled，Natashabegantolaugh，butNicholasknittedhisbrowsstillmoreandbeganprovingtoPierrethattherewasnoprospectofanygreatchangeandthatallthedangerhespokeofexistedonlyinhisimagination。Pierremaintainedthecontrary，andashismentalfacultiesweregreaterandmoreresourceful，Nicholasfelthimselfcornered。Thismadehimstillangrier，forhewasfullyconvinced，notbyreasoningbutbysomethingwithinhimstrongerthanreason，ofthejusticeofhisopinion。
"Iwilltellyouthis，"hesaid，risingandtryingwithnervouslytwitchingfingerstopropuphispipeinacorner，butfinallyabandoningtheattempt。"Ican’tproveittoyou。Yousaythateverythinghereisrottenandthatanoverthrowiscoming：Idon’tseeit。Butyoualsosaythatouroathofallegianceisaconditionalmatter，andtothatIreply：’Youaremybestfriend，asyouknow，butifyouformedasecretsocietyandbeganworkingagainstthegovernment—beitwhatitmay—Iknowitismydutytoobeythegovernment。AndifArakcheevorderedmetoleadasquadronagainstyouandcutyoudown，Ishouldnothesitateaninstant，butshoulddoit。’
Andyoumayargueaboutthatasyoulike！"
Anawkwardsilencefollowedthesewords。Natashawasthefirsttospeak，defendingherhusbandandattackingherbrother。Herdefensewasweakandinaptbutsheattainedherobject。Theconversationwasresumed，andnolongerintheunpleasantlyhostiletoneofNicholas’
lastremark。
Whentheyallgotuptogointosupper，littleNicholasBolkonskiwentuptoPierre，paleandwithshining，radianteyes。
"UnclePierre，you……no……IfPapawerealive……wouldheagreewithyou？"heasked。
AndPierresuddenlyrealizedwhataspecial，independent，complex，andpowerfulprocessofthoughtandfeelingmusthavebeengoingoninthisboyduringthatconversation，andrememberingallhehadsaidheregrettedthattheladshouldhaveheardhim。Hehad，however，togivehimananswer。
"Yes，Ithinkso，"hesaidreluctantly，andleftthestudy。
Theladlookeddownandseemednowforthefirsttimetonoticewhathehaddonetothethingsonthetable。HeflushedandwentuptoNicholas。
"Uncle，forgiveme，Ididthat……unintentionally，"hesaid，pointingtothebrokensealingwaxandpens。
Nicholasstartedangrily。
"Allright，allright，"hesaid，throwingthebitsunderthetable。
Andevidentlysuppressinghisvexationwithdifficulty，heturnedawayfromtheboy。
"Yououghtnottohavebeenhereatall，"hesaid。
EP1CH15
CHAPTERXV
Theconversationatsupperwasnotaboutpoliticsorsocieties，butturnedonthesubjectNicholaslikedbest—recollectionsof1812。DenisovstartedtheseandPierrewasparticularlyagreeableandamusingaboutthem。Thefamilyseparatedonthemostfriendlyterms。
AftersupperNicholas，havingundressedinhisstudyandgiveninstructionstothestewardwhohadbeenwaitingforhim，wenttothebedroominhisdressinggown，wherehefoundhiswifestillathertable，writing。
"Whatareyouwriting，Mary？"Nicholasasked。
CountessMaryblushed。Shewasafraidthatwhatshewaswritingwouldnotbeunderstoodorapprovedbyherhusband。
Shehadwantedtoconcealwhatshewaswritingfromhim，butatthesametimewasgladhehadsurprisedheratitandthatshewouldnowhavetotellhim。
"Adiary，Nicholas，"shereplied，handinghimablueexercisebookfilledwithherfirm，boldwriting。
"Adiary？"Nicholasrepeatedwithashadeofirony，andhetookupthebook。
ItwasinFrench。
December4。TodaywhenAndrushahereldestboywokeuphedidnotwishtodressandMademoiselleLouisesentforme。Hewasnaughtyandobstinate。Itriedthreats，butheonlygrewangrier。ThenItookthematterinhand：Ilefthimaloneandbeganwithnurse’shelptogettheotherchildrenup，tellinghimthatIdidnotlovehim。Foralongtimehewassilent，asifastonished，thenhejumpedoutofbed，rantomeinhisshirt，andsobbedsothatIcouldnotcalmhimforalongtime。Itwasplainthatwhattroubledhimmostwasthathehadgrievedme。AfterwardsintheeveningwhenIgavehimhisticket，heagainbegancryingpiteouslyandkissingme。Onecandoanythingwithhimbytenderness。
"Whatisa’ticket’？"Nicholasinquired。
"Ihavebegungivingtheelderonesmarkseveryevening，showinghowtheyhavebehaved。"
Nicholaslookedintotheradianteyesthatweregazingathim，andcontinuedtoturnoverthepagesandread。Inthediarywassetdowneverythinginthechildren’slivesthatseemednoteworthytotheirmotherasshowingtheircharactersorsuggestinggeneralreflectionsoneducationalmethods。Theywereforthemostpartquiteinsignificanttrifles，butdidnotseemsotothemotherortothefathereither，nowthathereadthisdiaryabouthischildrenforthefirsttime。
Underthedate"5"wasentered：
Mityawasnaughtyattable。Papasaidhewastohavenopudding。
Hehadnone，butlookedsounhappilyandgreedilyattheotherswhiletheywereeating！Ithinkthatpunishmentbydeprivingchildrenofsweetsonlydevelopstheirgreediness。MusttellNicholasthis。
Nicholasputdownthebookandlookedathiswife。Theradianteyesgazedathimquestioningly：wouldheapproveordisapproveofherdiary？Therecouldbenodoubtnotonlyofhisapprovalbutalsoofhisadmirationforhiswife。
Perhapsitneednotbedonesopedantically，thoughtNicholas，orevendoneatall，butthisuntiring，continualspiritualeffortofwhichthesoleaimwasthechildren’smoralwelfaredelightedhim。HadNicholasbeenabletoanalyzehisfeelingshewouldhavefoundthathissteady，tender，andproudloveofhiswiferestedonhisfeelingofwonderatherspiritualityandattheloftymoralworld，almostbeyondhisreach，inwhichshehadherbeing。
Hewasproudofherintelligenceandgoodness，recognizedhisowninsignificancebesideherinthespiritualworld，andrejoicedallthemorethatshewithsuchasoulnotonlybelongedtohimbutwaspartofhimself。
"Iquite，quiteapprove，mydearest！"saidhewithasignificantlook，andafterashortpauseheadded："AndIbehavedbadlytoday。
Youweren’tinthestudy。Webegandisputing—PierreandI—andIlostmytemper。Butheisimpossible：suchachild！Idon’tknowwhatwouldbecomeofhimifNatashadidn’tkeephiminhand……HaveyouanyideawhyhewenttoPetersburg？Theyhaveformed……"
"Yes，Iknow，"saidCountessMary。"Natashatoldme。"
"Well，then，youknow，"Nicholaswenton，growinghotatthemererecollectionoftheirdiscussion，"hewantedtoconvincemethatitiseveryhonestman’sdutytogoagainstthegovernment，andthattheoathofallegianceandduty……Iamsorryyouweren’tthere。Theyallfellonme—DenisovandNatasha……Natashaisabsurd。Howsherulesoverhim！Andyetthereneedonlybeadiscussionandshehasnowordsofherownbutonlyrepeatshissayings……"addedNicholas，yieldingtothatirresistibleinclinationwhichtemptsustojudgethosenearestanddearesttous。HeforgotthatwhathewassayingaboutNatashacouldhavebeenappliedwordforwordtohimselfinrelationtohiswife。
"Yes，Ihavenoticedthat，"saidCountessMary。
"WhenItoldhimthatdutyandtheoathwereaboveeverything，hestartedprovinggoodnessknowswhat！Apityyouwerenotthere—whatwouldyouhavesaid？"
"AsIseeityouwerequiteright，andItoldNatashaso。Pierresayseverybodyissuffering，tortured，andbeingcorrupted，andthatitisourdutytohelpourneighbor。Ofcourseheisrightthere，"
saidCountessMary，"butheforgetsthatwehaveotherdutiesnearertous，dutiesindicatedtousbyGodHimself，andthatthoughwemightexposeourselvestoriskswemustnotriskourchildren。"
"Yes，that’sit！That’sjustwhatIsaidtohim，"putinNicholas，whofanciedhereallyhadsaidit。"Buttheyinsistedontheirownview：loveofone’sneighborandChristianity—andallthisinthepresenceofyoungNicholas，whohadgoneintomystudyandbrokeallmythings。"
"Ah，Nicholas，doyouknowIamoftentroubledaboutlittleNicholas，"saidCountessMary。"Heissuchanexceptionalboy。IamafraidIneglecthiminfavorofmyown：weallhavechildrenandrelationswhilehehasnoone。Heisconstantlyalonewithhisthoughts。"
"Well，Idon’tthinkyouneedreproachyourselfonhisaccount。
Allthatthefondestmothercoulddoforhersonyouhavedoneandaredoingforhim，andofcourseIamgladofit。Heisafinelad，afinelad！ThiseveninghelistenedtoPierreinasortoftrance，andfancy—asweweregoingintosupperIlookedandhehadbrokeneverythingonmytabletobits，andhetoldmeofithimselfatonce！Ineverknewhimtotellanuntruth。Afinelad，afinelad！"
repeatedNicholas，whoatheartwasnotfondofNicholasBolkonskibutwasalwaysanxioustorecognizethathewasafinelad。
"Still，Iamnotthesameashisownmother，"saidCountessMary。"I
feelIamnotthesameandittroublesme。Awonderfulboy，butIamdreadfullyafraidforhim。Itwouldbegoodforhimtohavecompanions。"
"Wellitwon’tbeforlong。NextsummerI’lltakehimtoPetersburg，"saidNicholas。"Yes，Pierrealwayswasadreamerandalwayswillbe，"hecontinued，returningtothetalkinthestudywhichhadevidentlydisturbedhim。"Well，whatbusinessisitofminewhatgoesonthere—whetherArakcheevisbad，andallthat？
WhatbusinesswasitofminewhenImarriedandwassodeepindebtthatIwasthreatenedwithprison，andhadamotherwhocouldnotseeorunderstandit？Andthenthereareyouandthechildrenandouraffairs。IsitformyownpleasurethatIamatthefarmorintheofficefrommorningtonight？No，butIknowImustworktocomfortmymother，torepayyou，andnottoleavethechildrensuchbeggarsasIwas。"
CountessMarywantedtotellhimthatmandoesnotlivebybreadaloneandthatheattachedtoomuchimportancetothesematters。Butsheknewshemustnotsaythisandthatitwouldbeuselesstodoso。Sheonlytookhishandandkissedit。Hetookthisasasignofapprovalandaconfirmationofhisthoughts，andafterafewminutes’reflectioncontinuedtothinkaloud。
"Youknow，Mary，todayEliasMitrofanych"thiswashisoverseer
"camebackfromtheTambovestateandtoldmetheyarealreadyofferingeightythousandrublesfortheforest。"
AndwithaneagerfaceNicholasbegantospeakofthepossibilityofrepurchasingOtradnoebeforelong，andadded："AnothertenyearsoflifeandIshallleavethechildren……inanexcellentposition。"
CountessMarylistenedtoherhusbandandunderstoodallthathetoldher。Sheknewthatwhenhethoughtaloudinthiswayhewouldsometimesaskherwhathehadbeensaying，andbevexedifhenoticedthatshehadbeenthinkingaboutsomethingelse。Butshehadtoforceherselftoattend，forwhathewassayingdidnotinterestheratall。Shelookedathimanddidnotthink，butfelt，aboutsomethingdifferent。Shefeltasubmissivetenderloveforthismanwhowouldneverunderstandallthatsheunderstood，andthisseemedtomakeherloveforhimstillstrongerandaddedatouchofpassionatetenderness。Besidesthisfeelingwhichabsorbedheraltogetherandhinderedherfromfollowingthedetailsofherhusband’splans，thoughtsthathadnoconnectionwithwhathewassayingflittedthroughhermind。Shethoughtofhernephew。Herhusband’saccountoftheboy’sagitationwhilePierrewasspeakingstruckherforcibly，andvarioustraitsofhisgentle，sensitivecharacterrecurredtohermind；andwhilethinkingofhernephewshethoughtalsoofherownchildren。Shedidnotcomparethemwithhim，butcomparedherfeelingforthemwithherfeelingforhim，andfeltwithregretthattherewassomethinglackinginherfeelingforyoungNicholas。
Sometimesitseemedtoherthatthisdifferencearosefromthedifferenceintheirages，butshefeltherselftoblametowardhimandpromisedinherhearttodobetterandtoaccomplishtheimpossible—
inthislifetoloveherhusband，herchildren，littleNicholas，andallherneighbors，asChristlovedmankind。CountessMary’ssoulalwaysstrovetowardtheinfinite，theeternal，andtheabsolute，andcouldthereforeneverbeatpeace。Asternexpressionofthelofty，secretsufferingofasoulburdenedbythebodyappearedonherface。Nicholasgazedather。"OGod！Whatwillbecomeofusifshedies，asIalwaysfearwhenherfaceislikethat？"thoughthe，andplacinghimselfbeforetheiconhebegantosayhiseveningprayers。
EP1CH16
CHAPTERXVI
NatashaandPierre，leftalone，alsobegantotalkasonlyahusbandandwifecantalk，thatis，withextraordinaryclearnessandrapidity，understandingandexpressingeachother’sthoughtsinwayscontrarytoallrulesoflogic，withoutpremises，deductions，orconclusions，andinaquitepeculiarway。NatashawassousedtothiskindoftalkwithherhusbandthatforheritwasthesurestsignofsomethingbeingwrongbetweenthemifPierrefollowedalineoflogicalreasoning。Whenhebeganprovinganything，ortalkingargumentativelyandcalmlyandshe，ledonbyhisexample，begantodothesame，sheknewthattheywereonthevergeofaquarrel。
FromthemomenttheywerealoneandNatashacameuptohimwithwide—openhappyeyes，andquicklyseizinghisheadpressedittoherbosom，saying："Nowyouareallmine，mine！Youwon’tescape！"—fromthatmomentthisconversationbegan，contrarytoallthelawsoflogicandcontrarytothembecausequitedifferentsubjectsweretalkedaboutatoneandthesametime。Thissimultaneousdiscussionofmanytopicsdidnotpreventaclearunderstandingbutonthecontrarywasthesurestsignthattheyfullyunderstoodoneanother。
Justasinadreamwhenallisuncertain，unreasoning，andcontradictory，exceptthefeelingthatguidesthedream，sointhisintercoursecontrarytoalllawsofreason，thewordsthemselveswerenotconsecutiveandclearbutonlythefeelingthatpromptedthem。
NatashaspoketoPierreaboutherbrother’slifeanddoings，ofhowshehadsufferedandlackedlifeduringhisownabsence，andofhowshewasfonderthaneverofMary，andhowMarywasineverywaybetterthanherself。InsayingthisNatashawassincereinacknowledgin...完整阅读请扫描二维码下载丁香书院APP免费看：
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