BLOOMImean，Leopardstown。AndMollywonsevenshillingsonathreeyearoldnamedNevertellandcominghomealongbyFoxrockinthatoldfiveseatershanderadanofawaggonetteyouwereinyourheydaythenandyouhadonthatnewhatofwhitevelourswithasurroundofmolefurthatMrsHayesadvisedyoutobuybecauseitwasmarkeddowntonineteenandeleven，abitofwireandanoldragofvelveteen，andI’lllayyouwhatyoulikeshediditonpurpose……
　　MRSBREENShedid，ofcourse，thecat！Don’ttellme！Niceadviser！
　　BLOOMBecauseitdidn’tsuityouonequarteraswellastheotherduckylittletammytoquewiththebirdofparadisewinginitthatIadmiredonyouandyouhonestlylookedjusttoofetchinginitthoughitwasapitytokillit，youcruelcreature，littlemiteofathingwithaheartthesizeofafullstop。
　　MRSBREENSqueezeshisarm，simpers。NaughtycruelIwas。
　　BLOOMLow，secretly，evermorerapidly。AndMollywaseatingasandwichofspicedbeefoutofMrsJoeGallaher’slunchbasket。Frankly，thoughshehadheradvisersoradmirers，Inevercaredmuchforherstyle。
　　Shewas。
　　MRSBREENToo。
　　BLOOMYes。AndMollywaslaughingbecauseRogersandMaggotO’ReillyweremimickingacockaswepassedafarmhouseandMarcusTertiusMoses，theteamerchant，drovepastusinagigwithhisdaughter，DancerMoseswashername，andthepoodleinherlapbridledupandyouaskedmeifIeverheardorreadorkneworcameacross。
　　MRSBREENEagerly。Yes，yes，yes，yes，yes，yes，yes。
　　Shefadesfromhisside。Followedbythewhiningdoghewalksontowardshellsgates。Inanarchwayastandingwoman，bentforward，herfeetapart，pissescowily。Outsideashutteredpubabunchofloitererslistentoatalewhichtheirbrokensnoutedgafferraspsoutwithraucoushumour。
　　Anarmlesspairofthemflopwrestling，growling，inmaimedsoddenplayfight。
　　THEGAFFERCrouches，hisvoicetwistedinhissnout。AndwhenCairnscamedownfromthescaffoldinginBeaverStreetwhatwasheafterdoingitintoonlyintothebucketofporterthatwastherewaitingontheshavingsforDerwan’splasterers。
　　THELOITERERSGuffawwithcleftpalates。Ojays！
　　Theirpaintspeckledhatswag。Spatteredwithsizeandlimeoftheirlodgestheyfrisklimblesslyabouthim。
　　BLOOMCoincidencetoo。Theythinkitfunny。Anythingbutthat。Broaddaylight。Tryingtowalk。Luckynowoman。
　　THELOITERERSJays，that’sagoodone。Glaubersalts。Ojays，intothemen’sporter。
　　Bloompasses。Cheapwhores，singly，coupled，shawled，dishevelled，callfromlanes，doors，corners。
　　THEWHORESAreyougoingfar，queerfellow？How’syourmiddleleg？Gotamatchonyou？Eh，comeheretillIstiffenitforyou。
　　Heplodgesthroughtheirsumptowardsthelightedstreetbeyond。
　　Fromabulgeofwindowcurtainsagramophonerearsabatteredbrazentrunk。
　　Intheshadowashebeenkeeperhaggleswiththenavvyandthetworedcoats。
　　THENAVVYBelching。Where’sthebloodyhouse？
　　THESHEBEENKEEPERPurdonstreet。Shillingabottleofstout。Respectablewoman。
　　THENAVVYGrippingthetworedcoats，staggersforwardwiththem。
　　Comeon，youBritisharmy！
　　PRIVATECARRBehindhisback。Heainthalfbalmy。
　　PRIVATECOMPTONLAughs。Whatho！
　　PRIVATECARRTothenavvy。Portobellobarrackscanteen。YouaskforCarr。JustCarr。
　　THENAVVYShouts。
　　Wearetheboys。OfWexford。
　　PRIVATECOMPTONSay！Whatpricethesergeantmajor？
　　PRIVATECARRBennett？He’smypal。IloveoldBennett。
　　THENAVVYShouts。Thegallingchain。
　　Andfreeournativeland。Hestaggersforward，draggingthemwithhim。Bloomstops，atfault。
　　Thedogapproaches，histongueoutlolling，panting。
　　BLOOMWildgoosechasethis。Disorderlyhouses。Lordknowswheretheyaregone。Drunkscoverdistancedoublequick。Nicemixup。SceneatWestlandrow。Thenjumpinfirstclasswiththirdticket。Thentoofar。Trainwithenginebehind。MighthavetakenmetoMalahideorasidingforthenightorcollision。Seconddrinkdoesit。Onceisadose。WhatamIfollowinghimfor？Still，he’sthebestofthatlot。IfIhadn’theardaboutMrsBeaufoyPurefoyIwouldn’thavegoneandwouldn’thavemet。Kismet。He’lllosethatcash。Relievingofficehere。Goodbizforcheapjacks，organs。
　　Whatdoyelack？Soongot，soongone。Mighthavelostmylifetoowiththatmangongwheeltracktrolleyglarejuggernautonlyforpresenceofmind。
　　Can’talwayssaveyou，though。IfIhadpassedTruelock’swindowthatdaytwominuteslaterwouldhavebeenshot。Absenceofbody。Stillifbulletonlywentthroughmycoatgetdamagesforshock，fivehundredpounds。Whatwashe？Kildarestreetclubtoff。Godhelphisgamekeeper。
　　HegazesaheadreadingonthewallascrawledchalklegendWetDreamandaphallicdesign。
　　Odd！MollydrawingonthefrostedcarriagepaneatKingstown。What’sthatlike？Gaudydollwomenlollinthelighteddoorways，inwindowembrasures，smokingbirdseyecigarettes。Theodourofthesicksweetweedfloatstowardshiminslowroundovallingwreaths。
　　THEWREATHSSweetarethesweets。Sweetsofsin。
　　BLOOMMyspine’sabitlimp。Goorturn？Andthisfood？Eatitandgetallpigsticky。AbsurdIam。Wasteofmoney。Oneandeightpencetoomuch。
　　Theretrieverdrivesacoldsnivellingmuzzleagainsthishand，wagginghistail。Strangehowtheytaketome。Eventhatbrutetoday。Betterspeaktohimfirst。Likewomentheylikerencontres。Stinkslikeapolecat。Chacunsongoû；t。Hemightbemad。Fido。Uncertaininhismovements。Goodfellow！Garryowen！Thewolfdogsprawlsonhisback，wrigglingobscenelywithbeggingpaws，hislongblacktonguelollingout。Influenceofhissurroundings。Giveandhavedonewithit。Providednobody。Callingencouragingwordsheshamblesbackwithafurtivepoacher’stread，doggedbythesetterintoadarkstalestunkcorner。Heunrollsoneparcelandgoestodumpthecrubeensoftlybutholdsbackandfeelsthetrotter。Sizeableforthreepence。ButthenIhaveitinmylefthand。
　　Callsformoreeffort。Why？Smallerfromwantofuse。O，letitslide。
　　Twoandsix。
　　Withregretheletsunrolledcrubeenandtrotterslide。Themastiffmaulsthebundleclumsilyandglutshimselfwithgrowlinggreed，crunchingthebones。Tworaincapedwatchapproach，silent，vigilant。Theymurmurtogether。
　　THEWATCHBloom。OfBloom。ForBloom。Bloom。
　　EachlaysahandonBloomsshoulder。
　　FIRSTWATCHCaughtintheact。Commitnonuisance。
　　BLOOMStammers。Iamdoinggoodtoothers。
　　Acoveyofgulls，stormpetrels，riseshungrilyfromLiffeyslimewithBanburycakesintheirbeaks。
　　THEGULLSKawkavekankurykake。
　　BLOOMThefriendofman。Trainedbykindness。
　　Hepoints。BobDoran，topplingfromahighbarstool，swaysoverthemunchingspaniel。
　　BOBDORANTowser。Giveusthepaw。Givethepaw。
　　Thebulldoggrowls，hisscruffstanding，agobbetofpigsknucklebetweenhismolarsthroughwhichrabidscrumspittledribbles。BobDoranfallssilentlyintoanarea。
　　SECONDWATCHPreventionofcrueltytoanimals。
　　BLOOMEnthusiastically。Anoblework！IscoldedthattramdriveronHarold’scrossbridgeforillusingthepoorhorsewithhisharnessscab。
　　BadFrenchIgotformypains。Ofcourseitwasfrostyandthelasttram。
　　Alltalesofcircuslifearehighlydemoralising。
　　SignorMaffei，passionpale，inliontamer’scostumewithdiamondstudsinhisshirtfront，stepsforward，holdingacircuspaperhoop，acurlingcarriagewhipandarevolverwithwhichhecoversthegoingboarhound。
　　SIGNORMAFFEIWithasinistersmile。Ladiesandgentlemen，myeducatedgreyhound。ItwasIbrokeinthebuckingbronchoAjaxwithmypatentspikedsaddleforcarnivores。Lashunderthebellywithaknottedthong。Blocktackleandastranglingpullywillbringyourliontoheel，nomatterhowfractious，evenLeoferoxthere，theLibyanmaneater。
　　AredhotcrowbarandsomelinimentrubbingontheburningpartproducedFritzofAmsterdam，thethinkinghyena。Heglares。IpossesstheIndiansign。Theglintofmyeyedoesitwiththesebreastsparklers。Withabewitchingsmile。InowintroduceMademoiselleRuby，theprideofthering。
　　FIRSTWATCHCome。Nameandaddress。
　　BLOOMIhaveforgottenforthemoment。Ah，yes！Hetakesoffhishighgradehat，saluting。DrBloom，Leopold，dentalsurgeon。YouhaveheardofvonBloomPasha。Umpteenmillions。Donnerwetter！OwnshalfAustria。Egypt。Cousin。
　　FIRSTWATCHProof。
　　AcardfallsfrominsidetheleatherheadbandofBloom’shat。
　　BLOOMInredfez，cadi’sdresscoatwithbroadgreensash，wearingafalsebadgeoftheLegionofHonour，picksupthecardhastilyandoffersit。Allowme。MyclubistheJuniorArmyandNavy。Solicitors：MessrsJohnHenryMenton，27Bachelor’sWalk。
　　FIRSTWATCHReads。HenryFlower。Nofixedabode。Unlawfullywatchingandbesetting。
　　SECONDWATCHAnalibi。Youarecautioned。
　　BLOOMProducesfromhisheartpocketacrumpledyellowflower。
　　Thisistheflowerinquestion。ItwasgivenmebyamanIdon’tknowhisname。Plausibly。Youknowthatoldjoke，roseofCastille。Bloom。
　　ThechangeofnameVirag。Hemurmursprivatelyandconfidentially。
　　Weareengagedyousee，sergeant。Ladyinthecase。Loveentanglement。
　　Heshouldersthesecondwatchgently。Dashitall。It’sawaywegallantshaveinthenavy。Uniformthatdoesit。Heturnsgravelytothefirstwatch。Still，ofcourse，youdogetyourWaterloosometimes。
　　DropinsomeeveningandhaveaglassofoldBurgundy。Tothesecondwatchgaily。I’llintroduceyou，inspector。She’sgame。Doitinshakeofalamb’stail。
　　Adarkmercurialisedfaceappears，leadingaveiledfigure。
　　THEDARKMERCURYTheCastleislookingforhim。Hewasdrummedoutofthearmy。
　　MARTHAThickveiled，acrimsonhalterroundherneck，acopyoftheIrishTimesinherhand，intoneofreproach，pointing。Henry！Leopold！
　　Leopold！Lionel，thoulostone！Clearmyname。
　　FIRSTWATCHSternly。Cometothestation。
　　BLOOMScared，hatshimselfstepsback，then，pluckingathisheartandliftinghisrightforearmonthesquare，hegivesthesignanddueguardoffellowcraft。No，no，worshipfulmaster，lightoflove。Mistakenidentity。TheLyonsmail。LesurquesandDubosc。YouremembertheChildsfratricidecase。Wemedicalmen。Bystrikinghimdeadwithahatchet。I
　　amwrongfullyaccused。Betteroneguiltyescapethanninetyninewrongfullycondemned。
　　MARTHASobbingbehindherveil。Breachofpromise。MyrealnameisPeggyGriffin。Hewrotetomethathewasmiserable。I’lltellmybrother，theBectiveruggerfullback，onyou，heartlessflirt。
　　BLOOMBehindhishand。She’sdrunk。Thewomanisinebriated。
　　HemurmursvaguelythepastofEphraim。Shitbroleeth。
　　SECONDWATCHTearsinhiseyes，toBloom。Yououghttobethoroughlywellashamedofyourself。
　　BLOOMGentlemanofthejury，letmeexplain。Apuremare’snest。Iamamanmisunderstood。Iambeingmadeascapegoatof。Iamarespectablemarriedman，withoutastainonmycharacter。IliveinEcclesstreet。
　　Mywife，Iamthedaughterofamostdistinguishedcommander，agallantupstandinggentleman，whodoyoucallhim，MajorgeneralBrianTweedy，oneofBritain’sfightingmenwhohelpedtowinourbattles。GothismajorityfortheheroicdefenceofRorke’sDrift。
　　FIRSTWATCHRegiment。
　　BLOOMTurnstothegallery。TheroyalDublins，boys，thesaltoftheearth，knowntheworldover。IthinkIseesomeoldcomradesinarmsupthereamongyou。TheR。D。F。WithourownMetropolitanpolice，guardiansofourhomes，thepluckiestladsandthefinestbodyofmen，asphysique，intheserviceofoursovereign。