Viragtruculent，hisjowlset，staresatthelamp。GraveBloomregardsZoe’sneck。Henrygallantturnswithpendentdewlaptothepiano。
　　STEPHENTohimself。Playwithyoureyesshut。Imitatepa。Fillingmybellywithhusksofswine。Toomuchofthis。Iwillariseandgotomy。Expectthisisthe。Steve，thouartinaparlousway。MustvisitoldDeasyortelegraph。Ourinterviewofthismorninghasleftonmeadeepimpression。Thoughourages。Willwritefullytomorrow。I’mpartiallydrunk，bytheway。Hetouchesthekeysagain。Minorchordcomesnow。
　　Yes。Notmuchhowever。
　　AlmidanoArtifoniholdsoutabatonrollofmusicwithvigorousmoustachework。
　　ARTIFONICirifletta。Leirovinatutto。
　　FLORRYSingussomething。Love’soldsweetsong。
　　STEPHENNovoice。Iamamostfinishedartist。Lynch，didIshowyoutheletteraboutthelute？
　　FLORRYSmirking。Thebirdthatcansingandwon’tsing。
　　TheSiamesetwins，PhilipDrunkandPhilipSobertwoOxforddonswithlawnmowers，appearinthewindowembrasure。BotharemaskedwithMatthewArnold’sface。
　　PHILIPSOBERTakeafool’sadvice。Allisnotwell。Workitoutwiththebuttendofapencil，likeagoodyoungidiot。Threepoundstwelveyougot，twonotes，onesovereign，twocrowns，ifyouthbutknew。Mooney’senville，Mooney’ssurmer，theMoira，Larchet’s，Hollesstreethospital，Burke’s。Eh？Iamwatchingyou。
　　PHILIPDRUNKImpatiently。Ah，bosh，man。Gotohell！Ipaidmyway。IfIcouldonlyfindoutaboutoctaves。Reduplicationofpersonality。
　　Whowasittoldmehisname？
　　Hislawnmowerbeginstopurr。Aha，yes。Zoemousasagapo。
　　HaveanotionIwasherebefore。WhenwasitnotAtkinsonhiscardIhavesomewhere？Macsomebody。UnmackIhaveit。Hetoldmeabout，holdon，Swinburne，wasit，no？
　　FLORRYAndthesong？
　　STEPHENSpiritiswillingbutthefleshisweak。
　　FLORRYAreyououtofMaynooth？You’relikesomeoneIknewonce。
　　STEPHENOutofitnow。Tohimself。Clever。
　　PHILIPDRUNKANDPHILIPSOBERTheirlawnmowerspurringwitharigadoonofgrasshalms。Cleverever。Outofit。Outofit。Bythebyhaveyouthebook，thething，theashplant？Yes，thereit，yes。Clevereveroutofitnow。
　　Keepincondition。Dolikeus。
　　ZOETherewasapriestdownheretwonightsagotodohisbitofbusinesswithhiscoatbuttonedup。Youneedn’ttrytohide，Isaystohim。Iknowyou’veaRomancollar。
　　VIRAGPerfectlylogicalfromhisstandpoint。Fallofman。Harshly，hispupilswaxing。Tohellwiththepope！Nothingnewunderthesun。
　　IamtheViragwhodisclosedthesexsecretsofmonksandmaidens。WhyIlefttheChurchofRome。ReadthePriest，theWomanandtheConfessional。
　　Penrose。FlippertyJippert。Hewriggles。Woman，undoingwithsweetpudorherbeltofrushrope，offersherallmoistyonitoman’slingam。Shorttimeaftermanpresentswomanwithpiecesofjunglemeat。Womanshowsjoyandcoversherselfwithfeatherskins。Manlovesheryonifiercelywithbiglingam，thestiffone。Hecries。Coactusvolui。Thengiddywomanwillrunabout。Strongmangraspswoman’swrist。Womansqueals，bites，spucks。Man，nowfierceangry，strikeswoman’sfatyadgana。Hechaseshistail。Piffpaff！Popo！Hestops，sneezes。Pchp！Heworrieshisbutt。Prrrrrht！
　　LYNCHIhopeyougavethegoodfatherapenance。Ninegloriasforshootingabishop。
　　ZOESpoutswalrussmokethroughhernostrils。Hecouldn’tgetaconnection。Only，youknow，sensation。Adryrush。
　　BLOOMPoorman！
　　ZOELightly。Onlyforwhathappenedhim。
　　BLOOMHow？
　　VIRAGAdiabolicrictusofblackluminositycontractinghisvisage，craneshisscraggyneckforward。Heliftsamooncalfnozzleandhowls。
　　VerfluchteGoim！Hehadafather，fortyfathers。Heneverexisted。
　　PigGod！Hehadtwoleftfeet。HewasJudasIacchias，aLibyaneunuch，thepope’sbastard。Heleansoutontorturedforepaws，elbowsbentrigid，hiseyeagonisinginhisflatskullneckandyelpsoverthemuteworld。Asonofawhore。Apocalypse。
　　KITTYAndMaryShortallthatwasinthelockwiththepoxshegotfromJimmyPidgeoninthebluecapshadachildoffhimthatcouldn’tswallowandwassmotheredwiththeconvulsionsinthemattressandweallsubscribedforthefuneral。
　　PHILIPDRUNKGravely。Quivousamisdanscettefichueposition，Philippe？
　　PHILIPSOBERGaily。C’é；taitlesacré；pigeon，Philippe。
　　Kittyunpinsherhatandsetsitdowncalmly，pattingherhennahair。Andaprettier，adaintierheadofwinsomecurlswasneverseenonawhoresshoulders。Lynchputsonherhat。Shewhipsitoff。
　　LYNCHLaughs。AndtosuchdelightshasMetchnikoffinoculatedanthropoidapes。
　　FLORRYNods。Locomotorataxy。
　　ZOEGaily。O，mydictionary。
　　LYNCHThreewisevirgins。
　　VIRAGAgueshaken，profuseyellowspawnfoamingoverhisbonyepilepticlips。Shesoldlovephiltres，whitewax，orangeflower。Panther，theRomancenturion，pollutedherwithhisgenitories。Hesticksoutaflickeringphosphorescentscorpiontongue，hishandonhisfork。Messiah！
　　Hebursthertympanum。Withgibberingbaboon’scrieshejerkshishipsinthecynicalspasm。Hik！Hek！Hak！Hok！Huk！Kok！Kuk！
　　BenJumboDollard，rubicund，musclebound，hairynostrilled，hugebearded，cabbageeared，shaggychested，shockmaned，fatpapped，standsforth，hisloinsandgenitalstightenedintoapairofblackbathingbagslops。
　　BENPOLLARDNakkeringcastanetbonesinhishugepaddedpaws，yodelsjoviallyinbasebarreltone。Whenloveabsorbsmyardentsoul。
　　Thevirgins，NurseCallanandNurseQuigley，burstthroughtheringkeepersandtheropesandmobhimwithopenarms。
　　THEVIRGINSGushingly。BigBen！BenMacChree！
　　AVOICEHoldthatfellowwiththebadbreeches。
　　BENDOLLARDSmiteshisthighinabundantlaughter。Holdhimnow。
　　HENRYCaressingonhisbreastaseveredfemalehead，murmurs。
　　Thineheart，minelove。Hepluckshislutestrings。WhenfirstIsaw。
　　VIRAGSloughinghisskins，hismultitudinousplumagemoulting。
　　Rats！Heyawns；showingacoalblackthroatandcloseshisjawsbyanupwardpushofhisparchmentroll。AfterhavingsaidwhichItookmydeparture。Farewell。Faretheewell。Dreck！
　　HenryFlowercombshismoustacheandbeardrapidlywithapocketcombandgivesacowslicktohishair。Steeredbyhisrapier，heglidestothedoorhiswildhadslungbehindhim。Viragreachesthedoorintwoungainlystilthops，histailcocked，anddeftlyclapssidewaysonthewallapusyellowflybill，buttingitwithhishead。
　　THEFLYBILLK。11。postnobills。Strictlyconfidential。DrHyFranks。
　　HENRYAllislostnow。
　　Viragunscrewshisheadinatriceandholdsitunderhisarm。
　　VIRAG’SHEADQuack！
　　Exeuntseverally。
　　STEPHENOverhisshouldertoZoe。Youwouldhavepreferredthefightingparsonwhofoundedtheprotestanterror。ButbewareAntisthenes，thedogsage，andthelastendofAnusHeresiarchus。Theagonyinthecloset。
　　LYNCHAlloneandthesameGodtoher。
　　STEPHENDevoutly。AndSovereignLordofallthings。
　　FLORRYToStephen。I’msureyouareaspoiledpriest。Oramonk。
　　LYNCHHeis。ACardinal’sson。
　　STEPHENCardinalsin。Monksofthescrew。
　　HisEminence，SimonStephenCardinalDedalus，PrimateofallIreland，appearsinthedoorway，dressedinredsoutane，sandalsandsocks。Sevendwarfsimianacolytes，alsoinred，cardinalsins，upholdhistrain，peepingunderit。Hewearsabatteredsilkhatsidewaysonhishead。Histhumbsarestuckinhisarmpitsandhispalmsoutspread。Roundhisneckhangsarosaryofcorksendingonhisbreastinacorkscrewcross。Releasinghisthumbs，heinvokesgracefromonhighwithlacewavegesturesandproclaimswithbloatedpomp。
　　THECARDINALConservioliescaptured。
　　HeliesinthelowestdungeonWithmanaclesandchainsaroundhislimbsWeighingupwardsofthreetons。Helooksatallforamoment，hisrighteyeclosedtight，hisleftcheekpuffedout。Then，unabletorepresshismerriment，herockstoandfro，adsakimbo，andsingswithbroadrollickinghumour。O，thepoorlittlefellowHi-hi-hi-hi-hislegstheywereyellowHewasplump，fatandheavyandbriskasasnakeButsomebloodysavageTograizehiswhitecabbageHemurderedNellFlaherty’sducklovingdrake。
　　Amultitudeofmidgesswarmsoverhisrobe。Hescratcheshimselfwithcrossedarmsathisribs，grimacing，andexclaims。I’msufferingtheagonyofthedamned。Bythehokyfiddle，thanksbetoJesusthosefunnylittlechapsarenotunanimous。Iftheywerethey’dwalkmeoffthefaceofthebloodyglobe。
　　Hisheadaslant，heblessescurtlywithforeandmiddlefingers，impartstheEasterkissanddoubleshufflesoffcomically，swayinghishatfromsidetoside，shrinkingquicklytothesizeofhistrainbearers。
　　Thedwarfacolytes，giggling，peeping，nudging，ogling，Easterkissing，zigzagbehindhim。Hisvoiceisheardmellowfromafar，merciful，male，melodious。Shallcarrymyhearttothee，Shallcarrymyhearttothee，AndthebreathofthebalmynightShallcarrymyhearttothee。
　　Thetrickdoorhandleturns。
　　THEDOORHANDLETheeee。
　　ZOEThedevilisinthatdoor。
　　Amaleformpassesdownthecreakingstaircaseandisheardtakingthewaterproofandhatfromtherack。Bloomstartsforwardinvoluntarilyand，halfclosingthedoorashepasses，takesthechocolatefromhispocketandoffersitnervouslytoZoe。
　　ZOESniffshishairbriskly。Hum。Thankyourmotherfortherabbits。I’mveryfondofwhatIlike。
　　BLOOMHearingamalevoiceintalkwiththewhoresonthedoorstep，prickshisears。Ifitwerehe？After？Orbecausenot？Orthedoubleevent？
　　ZOETearsopenthesilverfoil。Fingerswasmadebeforeforks。
　　Shebreaksoffandnibblesapiece，givesapiecetoKittyRickettsandthenturnskittenishlytoLynch。NoobjectiontoFrenchlozenges？
　　Henods。Shetauntshim。Haveitnoworwaittillyougetit？
　　Heopenshismouth，hisheadcocked。Shewhirlstheprizeinleftcircle。
　　Hisheadfollows。Shewhirlsitbackinrightcircle。Heeyesher。
　　Catch。
　　Shetossesapiece。Withanadroitsnaphecatchesitandbitesitthroughwithacrack。
　　KITTYChewing。TheengineerIwaswithatthebazaardoeshavelovelyones。Fullofthebestliqueurs。Andtheviceroywastherewithhislady。ThegaswehadontheToft’shobbyhorses。I’mgiddystill。
　　BLOOMInSvengali’sfurovercoat，withfoldedarmsandNapoleonicforelock，frownsinventriloquialexorcismwithpiercingeagleglancetowardsthedoor。Then，rigid，withleftfootadvanced，hemakesaswiftpasswithimpellingfingersandgivesthesignofpastmaster，drawinghisrightarmdownwardsfromhisleftshoulder。Go，go，go，Iconjureyou，whoeveryouare。
　　Amalecoughandtreadareheardpassingthroughthemistoutside。
　　Bloomsfeaturesrelax。Heplacesahandinhiswaistcoat，posingcalmly。
　　Zoeoffershimchocolate。
　　BLOOMSolemnly。Thanks。
　　ZOEDoasyou’rebid。Here。