“Downthere,walkingontheroadtothevillageShewasinabluedress,andsheliftedtheveilofherbonnetandsaid:——’RamDass,givemysalaamstotheSahib,andtellhimthatIshallmeethimnextmonthatNuddea。’ThenIranaway,becauseIwasafraid。”
WhatDumoisesaidordidIdonotknowRamDassdeclaresthathesaidnothing,butwalkedupanddowntheverandahallthecoldnight,waitingfortheMemsahibtocomeupthehillandstretchingouthisarmsintothedarklikeamadmanButnoMemsahibcame,and,nextday,hewentontoSimlacross-questioningthebearereveryhour。
RamDasscouldonlysaythathehadmetMrsDumoiseandthatshehadliftedupherveilandgivenhimthemessagewhichhehadfaithfullyrepeatedtoDumoiseTothisstatementRamDassadhered。
HedidnotknowwhereNuddeawas,hadnofriendsatNuddea,andwouldmostcertainlynevergotoNuddea;eventhoughhispayweredoubled。
NuddeaisinBengal,andhasnothingwhatevertodowithadoctorservinginthePunjabItmustbemorethantwelvehundredmilesfromMeridki。
DumoisewentthroughSimlawithouthalting,andreturnedtoMeridkitheretotakeoverchargefromthemanwhohadbeenofficiatingforhimduringhistourThereweresomeDispensaryaccountstobeexplained,andsomerecentordersoftheSurgeon-Generaltobenoted,and,altogether,thetaking-overwasafullday’sworkIntheevening,Dumoisetoldhislocumtenens,whowasanoldfriendofhisbachelordays,whathadhappenedatBagi;andthemansaidthatRamDassmightaswellhavechosenTuticorinwhilehewasaboutit。
Atthatmomentatelegraph-peoncameinwithatelegramfromSimla,orderingDumoisenottotakeoverchargeatMeridki,buttogoatoncetoNuddeaonspecialdutyTherewasanastyoutbreakofcholeraatNuddea,andtheBengalGovernment,beingshorthanded,asusual,hadborrowedaSurgeonfromthePunjab。
Dumoisethrewthetelegramacrossthetableandsaid:——“Well?”
TheotherDoctorsaidnothingItwasallthathecouldsay。
ThenherememberedthatDumoisehadpassedthroughSimlaonhiswayfromBagi;andthusmight,possibly,haveheardthefirstnewsoftheimpendingtransfer。
Hetriedtoputthequestion,andtheimpliedsuspicionintowords,butDumoisestoppedhimwith:——“IfIhaddesiredTHAT,IshouldneverhavecomebackfromChiniIwasshootingthereIwishtolive,forIhavethingstodobutIshallnotbesorry。”
Theothermanbowedhishead,andhelped,inthetwilight,topackupDumoise’sjustopenedtrunksRamDassenteredwiththelamps。
“WhereistheSahibgoing?”heasked。
“ToNuddea。”saidDumoise,softly。
RamDassclawedDumoise’skneesandbootsandbeggedhimnottogo。
RamDassweptandhowledtillhewasturnedoutoftheroom。
ThenhewrappedupallhisbelongingsandcamebacktoaskforacharacterHewasnotgoingtoNuddeatoseehisSahibdie,and,perhapstodiehimself。
SoDumoisegavethemanhiswagesandwentdowntoNuddeaalone;theotherDoctorbiddinghimgood-byeasoneundersentenceofdeath。
Elevendayslater,hehadjoinedhisMemsahib;andtheBengalGovernmenthadtoborrowafreshDoctortocopewiththatepidemicatNuddeaThefirstimportationlaydeadinChooadangaDak-
Bungalow。
TOBEHELDFORREFERENCE。
BythehoofoftheWildGoatup-tossedFromtheCliffwhereShelayintheSun,FelltheStoneTotheTarnwherethedaylightislost;
SoShefellfromthelightoftheSun,Andalone。
Nowthefallwasordainedfromthefirst,WiththeGoatandtheCliffandtheTarn,ButtheStoneKnowsonlyHerlifeisaccursed,AsShesinksinthedepthsoftheTarn,Andalone。
Oh,ThouwhohasbuildedtheworldOh,ThouwhohastlightedtheSun!
Oh,ThouwhohastdarkenedtheTarn!
JudgeThouTheSinoftheStonethatwashurledBytheGoatfromthelightoftheSun,AsShesinksinthemireoftheTarn,Evennow——evennow——evennow!
FromtheUnpublishedPapersofMcIntoshJellaludin。
“Say,isitdawn,isitduskinthyBower,ThouwhomIlongfor,wholongestforme?
Ohbeitnight——beit——“
Herehefelloveralittlecamel-coltthatwassleepingintheSeraiwherethehorse-tradersandthebestoftheblackguardsfromCentralAsialive;and,becausehewasverydrunkindeedandthenightwasdark,hecouldnotriseagaintillIhelpedhimThatwasthebeginningofmyacquaintancewithMcIntoshJellaludinWhenaloafer,anddrunk,singsTheSongoftheBower,hemustbeworthcultivatingHegotoffthecamel’sbackandsaid,ratherthickly:——
“I——I——I’mabitscrewed,butadipinLoggerheadwillputmerightagain;andIsay,haveyouspokentoSymondsaboutthemare’sknees?”
NowLoggerheadwassixthousandwearymilesawayfromus,closetoMesopotamia,whereyoumustn’tfishandpoachingisimpossible,andCharleySymonds’stableahalfmilefurtheracrossthepaddocks。
Itwasstrangetohearalltheoldnames,onaMaynight,amongthehorsesandcamelsoftheSultanCaravanseraiThenthemanseemedtorememberhimselfandsoberdownatthesametimeHeleanedagainstthecamelandpointedtoacorneroftheSeraiwherealampwasburning:——
“Ilivethere。”saidhe,“andIshouldbeextremelyobligedifyouwouldbegoodenoughtohelpmymutinousfeetthither;forIammorethanusuallydrunk——most——mostphenomenallytightButnotinrespecttomyhead’Mybraincriesoutagainst’——howdoesitgo?
Butmyheadridesonthe——rollsonthedung-hillIshouldhavesaid,andcontrolsthequalm。”
Ihelpedhimthroughthegangsoftetheredhorsesandhecollapsedontheedgeoftheverandahinfrontofthelineofnativequarters。
“Thanks——athousandthanks!OMoonandlittle,littleStars!TothinkthatamanshouldsoshamelesslyInfamousliquor,tooOvidinexiledranknoworseBetterItwasfrozenAlas!
IhadnoiceGood-nightIwouldintroduceyoutomywifewereI
sober——orshecivilized。”
Anativewomancameoutofthedarknessoftheroom,andbegancallingthemannames;soIwentawayHewasthemostinterestingloaferthatIhadthepleasureofknowingforalongtime;andlateron,hebecameafriendofmineHewasatall,well-built,fairmanfearfullyshakenwithdrink,andhelookednearerfiftythanthethirty-fivewhich,hesaid,washisrealageWhenamanbeginstosinkinIndia,andisnotsentHomebyhisfriendsassoonasmaybe,hefallsverylowfromarespectablepointofviewBythetimethathechangeshiscreed,asdidMcIntosh,heispastredemption。
Inmostbigcities,nativeswilltellyouoftwoorthreeSahibs,generallylow-caste,whohaveturnedHinduorMussulman,andwholivemoreorlessassuchButitisnotoftenthatyoucangettoknowthemAsMcIntoshhimselfusedtosay:——“IfIchangemyreligionformystomach’ssake,Idonotseektobecomeamartyrtomissionaries,noramIanxiousfornotoriety。”
AttheoutsetofacquaintanceMcIntoshwarnedme“Rememberthis。
IamnotanobjectforcharityIrequireneitheryourmoney,yourfood,noryourcast-offraimentIamthatrareanimal,aself-
supportingdrunkardIfyouchoose,Iwillsmokewithyou,forthetobaccoofthebazarsdoesnot,Iadmit,suitmypalate;andIwillborrowanybookswhichyoumaynotspeciallyvalueItismorethanlikelythatIshallsellthemforbottlesofexcessivelyfilthycountry-liquorsInreturn,youshallsharesuchhospitalityasmyhouseaffordsHereisacharpoyonwhichtwocansit,anditispossiblethattheremay,fromtimetotime,befoodinthatplatter。
Drink,unfortunately,youwillfindonthepremisesatanyhour:
andthusImakeyouwelcometoallmypoorestablishments。”
IwasadmittedtotheMcIntoshhousehold——Iandmygoodtobacco。
ButnothingelseUnluckily,onecannotvisitaloaferintheSeraibydayFriendsbuyinghorseswouldnotunderstandit。
Consequently,IwasobligedtoseeMcIntoshafterdarkHelaughedatthis,andsaidsimply:——“YouareperfectlyrightWhenIenjoyedapositioninsociety,ratherhigherthanyours,Ishouldhavedoneexactlythesamething,GoodHeavens!Iwasonce“——hespokeasthoughhehadfallenfromtheCommandofaRegiment——“anOxfordMan!”ThisaccountedforthereferencetoCharleySymonds’
stable。
“You。”saidMcIntosh,slowly,“havenothadthatadvantage;but,tooutwardappearance,youdonotseempossessedofacravingforstrongdrinksOnthewhole,IfancythatyouaretheluckierofthetwoYetIamnotcertainYouare——forgivemysayingsoevenwhileIamsmokingyourexcellenttobacco——painfullyignorantofmanythings。”
Weweresittingtogetherontheedgeofhisbedstead,forheownednochairs,watchingthehorsesbeingwateredforthenight,whilethenativewomanwaspreparingdinnerIdidnotlikebeingpatronizedbyaloafer,butIwashisguestforthetimebeing,thoughheownedonlyoneverytornalpaca-coatandapairoftrousersmadeoutofgunny-bagsHetookthepipeoutofhismouth,andwentonjudicially:——“Allthingsconsidered,IdoubtwhetheryouaretheluckierIdonotrefertoyourextremelylimitedclassicalattainments,oryourexcruciatingquantities,buttoyourgrossignoranceofmattersmoreimmediatelyunderyournoticeThatforinstance。”——HepointedtoawomancleaningasamovarnearthewellinthecentreoftheSeraiShewasflickingthewateroutofthespoutinregularcadencedjerks。
“TherearewaysandwaysofcleaningsamovarsIfyouknewwhyshewasdoingherworkinthatparticularfashion,youwouldknowwhattheSpanishMonkmeantwhenhesaid——
’ItheTrinityillustrate,Drinkingwateredorange-pulp——
InthreesipstheAryanfrustrate,Whilehedrainshisatonegulp——’
andmanyotherthingswhichnowarehiddenfromyoureyes。
However,MrsMcIntoshhasprepareddinnerLetuscomeandeatafterthefashionofthepeopleofthecountry——ofwhom,bytheway,youknownothing。”
ThenativewomandippedherhandinthedishwithusThiswaswrongThewifeshouldalwayswaituntilthehusbandhaseaten。
McIntoshJellaludinapologized,saying:——
“ItisanEnglishprejudicewhichIhavenotbeenabletoovercome;
andshelovesmeWhy,IhaveneverbeenabletounderstandI
fore-gatheredwithheratJullundur,threeyearsago,andshehasremainedwithmeeversinceIbelievehertobemoral,andknowhertobeskilledincookery。”
Hepattedthewoman’sheadashespoke,andshecooedsoftly。
Shewasnotprettytolookat。
McIntoshnevertoldmewhatpositionhehadheldbeforehisfall。
Hewas,whensober,ascholarandagentlemanWhendrunk,hewasrathermoreofthefirstthanthesecondHeusedtogetdrunkaboutonceaweekfortwodaysOnthoseoccasionsthenativewomantendedhimwhileheravedinalltonguesexcepthisownOneday,indeed,hebeganrecitingAtalantainCalydon,andwentthroughittotheend,beatingtimetotheswingoftheversewithabedstead-
legButhedidmostofhisravingsinGreekorGermanTheman’smindwasaperfectrag-bagofuselessthingsOnce,whenhewasbeginningtogetsober,hetoldmethatIwastheonlyrationalbeingintheInfernointowhichhehaddescended——aVirgilintheShades,hesaid——andthat,inreturnformytobacco,hewould,beforehedied,givemethematerialsofanewInfernothatshouldmakemegreaterthanDanteThenhefellasleeponahorse-blanketandwokeupquitecalm。
“Man。”saidhe,“whenyouhavereachedtheuttermostdepthsofdegradation,littleincidentswhichwouldvexahigherlife,aretoyouofnoconsequenceLastnight,mysoulwasamongthegods;
butImakenodoubtthatmybestialbodywaswrithingdownhereinthegarbage。”
“Youwereabominablydrunkifthat’swhatyoumean。”Isaid。
“IWASdrunk——filthydrunkIwhoamthesonofamanwithwhomyouhavenoconcern——IwhowasonceFellowofaCollegewhosebuttery-
hatchyouhavenotseenIwasloathsomelydrunkButconsiderhowlightlyIamtouchedItisnothingtomeLessthannothing;forIdonotevenfeeltheheadachewhichshouldbemyportionNow,inahigherlife,howghastlywouldhavebeenmypunishment,howbittermyrepentance!Believeme,myfriendwiththeneglectededucation,thehighestisasthelowest——alwayssupposingeachdegreeextreme。”
Heturnedroundontheblanket,puthisheadbetweenhisfistsandcontinued:——
“OntheSoulwhichIhavelostandontheConsciencewhichIhavekilled,ItellyouthatICANNOTfeel!Iamasthegods,knowinggoodandevil,butuntouchedbyeitherIsthisenviableorisitnot?”
Whenamanhaslostthewarningof“nextmorning’shead。”hemustbeinabadstate,Ianswered,lookingatMcIntoshontheblanket,withhishairoverhiseyesandhislipsblue-white,thatIdidnotthinktheinsensibilitygoodenough。