TheremarksIhavemadeonfilialloveandfraternalaffectionareapplicabletoallthepassionswhichemanatespontaneouslyfromhumannatureitself。Ifacertainmodeofthoughtorfeelingistheresultofsomepeculiarconditionoflife，whenthatconditionisalterednothingwhateverremainsofthethoughtorfeeling。Thusalawmaybindtwomembersofthecommunityverycloselytooneanother;butthatlawbeingabolished，theystandasunder。Nothingwasmorestrictthanthetiewhichunitedthevassaltothelordunderthefeudalsystem;
atthepresentdaythetwomenknownoteachother;thefear，thegratitude，andtheaffectionwhichformerlyconnectedthemhavevanished，andnotavestigeofthetieremains。Such，however，isnotthecasewiththosefeelingswhicharenaturaltomankind。
Wheneveralawattemptstotutorthesefeelingsinanyparticularmanner，itseldomfailstoweakenthem;byattemptingtoaddtotheirintensity，itrobsthemofsomeoftheirelements，fortheyareneverstrongerthanwhenlefttothemselves。
Democracy，whichdestroysorobscuresalmostalltheoldconventionalrulesofsociety，andwhichpreventsmenfromreadilyassentingtonewones，entirelyeffacesmostofthefeelingstowhichtheseconventionalruleshavegivenrise;butitonlymodifiessomeothers，andfrequentlyimpartstothemadegreeofenergyandsweetnessunknownbefore。Perhapsitisnotimpossibletocondenseintoasinglepropositionthewholemeaningofthischapter，andofseveralothersthatprecededit。
Democracyloosenssocialties，butitdrawsthetiesofnaturemoretight;itbringskindredmorecloselytogether，whilstitplacesthevariousmembersofthecommunitymorewidelyapart。
ChapterIX:EducationOfYoungWomenInTheUnitedStatesNofreecommunitieseverexistedwithoutmorals;and，asI
observedintheformerpartofthiswork，moralsaretheworkofwoman。Consequently，whateveraffectstheconditionofwomen，theirhabitsandtheiropinions，hasgreatpoliticalimportanceinmyeyes。AmongstalmostallProtestantnationsyoungwomenarefarmorethemistressesoftheirownactionsthantheyareinCatholiccountries。ThisindependenceisstillgreaterinProtestantcountries，likeEngland，whichhaveretainedoracquiredtherightofself—government;thespiritoffreedomistheninfusedintothedomesticcirclebypoliticalhabitsandbyreligiousopinions。IntheUnitedStatesthedoctrinesofProtestantismarecombinedwithgreatpoliticalfreedomandamostdemocraticstateofsociety;andnowhereareyoungwomensurrenderedsoearlyorsocompletelytotheirownguidance。
LongbeforeanAmericangirlarrivesattheageofmarriage，heremancipationfrommaternalcontrolbegins;shehasscarcelyceasedtobeachildwhenshealreadythinksforherself，speakswithfreedom，andactsonherownimpulse。Thegreatsceneoftheworldisconstantlyopentoherview;farfromseekingconcealment，itiseverydaydisclosedtohermorecompletely，andsheistaughttosurveyitwithafirmandcalmgaze。Thusthevicesanddangersofsocietyareearlyrevealedtoher;assheseesthemclearly，sheviewsthemwithoutillusions，andbravesthemwithoutfear;forsheisfullofrelianceonherownstrength，andherrelianceseemstobesharedbyallwhoareabouther。AnAmericangirlscarcelyeverdisplaysthatvirginalbloominthemidstofyoungdesires，orthatinnocentandingenuousgracewhichusuallyattendstheEuropeanwomaninthetransitionfromgirlhoodtoyouth。ItisrarelythatanAmericanwomanatanyagedisplayschildishtimidityorignorance。LiketheyoungwomenofEurope，sheseekstoplease，butsheknowspreciselythecostofpleasing。Ifshedoesnotabandonherselftoevil，atleastsheknowsthatitexists;andsheisremarkableratherforpurityofmannersthanforchastityofmind。Ihavebeenfrequentlysurprised，andalmostfrightened，atthesingularaddressandhappyboldnesswithwhichyoungwomeninAmericacontrivetomanagetheirthoughtsandtheirlanguageamidstallthedifficultiesofstimulatingconversation;aphilosopherwouldhavestumbledateverystepalongthenarrowpathwhichtheytrodwithoutaccidentsandwithouteffort。Itiseasyindeedtoperceivethat，evenamidsttheindependenceofearlyyouth，anAmericanwomanisalwaysmistressofherself;sheindulgesinallpermittedpleasures，withoutyieldingherselfuptoanyofthem;
andherreasonneverallowsthereinsofself—guidancetodrop，thoughitoftenseemstoholdthemloosely。
InFrance，whereremnantsofeveryagearestillsostrangelymingledintheopinionsandtastesofthepeople，womencommonlyreceiveareserved，retired，andalmostcloistraleducation，astheydidinaristocratictimes;andthentheyaresuddenlyabandoned，withoutaguideandwithoutassistance，inthemidstofalltheirregularitiesinseparablefromdemocraticsociety。TheAmericansaremoreconsistent。Theyhavefoundoutthatinademocracytheindependenceofindividualscannotfailtobeverygreat，youthpremature，tastesill—restrained，customsfleeting，publicopinionoftenunsettledandpowerless，paternalauthorityweak，andmaritalauthoritycontested。Underthesecircumstances，believingthattheyhadlittlechanceofrepressinginwomanthemostvehementpassionsofthehumanheart，theyheldthatthesurerwaywastoteachhertheartofcombatingthosepassionsforherself。Astheycouldnotpreventhervirtuefrombeingexposedtofrequentdanger，theydeterminedthatsheshouldknowhowbesttodefendit;andmorereliancewasplacedonthefreevigorofherwillthanonsafeguardswhichhavebeenshakenoroverthrown。Instead，then，ofinculcatingmistrustofherself，theyconstantlyseektoenhancetheirconfidenceinherownstrengthofcharacter。Asitisneitherpossiblenordesirabletokeepayoungwomaninperpetualorcompleteignorance，theyhastentogiveheraprecociousknowledgeonallsubjects。Farfromhidingthecorruptionsoftheworldfromher，theypreferthatsheshouldseethematonceandtrainherselftoshunthem;andtheyholditofmoreimportancetoprotectherconductthantobeover—scrupulousofherinnocence。
AlthoughtheAmericansareaveryreligiouspeople，theydonotrelyonreligionalonetodefendthevirtueofwoman;theyseektoarmherreasonalso。Inthistheyhavefollowedthesamemethodasinseveralotherrespects;theyfirstmakethemostvigorouseffortstobringindividualindependencetoexerciseapropercontroloveritself，andtheydonotcallintheaidofreligionuntiltheyhavereachedtheutmostlimitsofhumanstrength。Iamawarethataneducationofthiskindisnotwithoutdanger;Iamsensiblethatittendstoinvigoratethejudgmentattheexpenseoftheimagination，andtomakecoldandvirtuouswomeninsteadofaffectionatewivesandagreeablecompanionstoman。Societymaybemoretranquilandbetterregulated，butdomesticlifehasoftenfewercharms。These，however，aresecondaryevils，whichmaybebravedforthesakeofhigherinterests。Atthestageatwhichwearenowarrivedthetimeforchoosingisnolongerwithinourcontrol;ademocraticeducationisindispensabletoprotectwomenfromthedangerswithwhichdemocraticinstitutionsandmannerssurroundthem。
ChapterX:TheYoungWomanInTheCharacterOfAWifeInAmericatheindependenceofwomanisirrevocablylostinthebondsofmatrimony:ifanunmarriedwomanislessconstrainedtherethanelsewhere，awifeissubjectedtostricterobligations。Theformermakesherfather’shouseanabodeoffreedomandofpleasure;thelatterlivesinthehomeofherhusbandasifitwereacloister。Yetthesetwodifferentconditionsoflifeareperhapsnotsocontraryasmaybesupposed，anditisnaturalthattheAmericanwomenshouldpassthroughtheonetoarriveattheother。
Religiouspeoplesandtradingnationsentertainpeculiarlyseriousnotionsofmarriage:theformerconsidertheregularityofwoman’slifeasthebestpledgeandmostcertainsignofthepurityofhermorals;thelatterregarditasthehighestsecurityfortheorderandprosperityofthehousehold。TheAmericansareatthesametimeapuritanicalpeopleandacommercialnation:theirreligiousopinions，aswellastheirtradinghabits，consequentlyleadthemtorequiremuchabnegationonthepartofwoman，andaconstantsacrificeofherpleasurestoherdutieswhichisseldomdemandedofherinEurope。ThusintheUnitedStatestheinexorableopinionofthepubliccarefullycircumscribeswomanwithinthenarrowcircleofdomesticinterestandduties，andforbidshertostepbeyondit。
UponherentranceintotheworldayoungAmericanwomanfindsthesenotionsfirmlyestablished;sheseestheruleswhicharederivedfromthem;sheisnotslowtoperceivethatshecannotdepartforaninstantfromtheestablishedusagesofhercontemporaries，withoutputtinginjeopardyherpeaceofmind，herhonor，nayevenhersocialexistence;andshefindstheenergyrequiredforsuchanactofsubmissioninthefirmnessofherunderstandingandinthevirilehabitswhichhereducationhasgivenher。Itmaybesaidthatshehaslearnedbytheuseofherindependencetosurrenderitwithoutastruggleandwithoutamurmurwhenthetimecomesformakingthesacrifice。ButnoAmericanwomanfallsintothetoilsofmatrimonyasintoasnareheldouttohersimplicityandignorance。Shehasbeentaughtbeforehandwhatisexpectedofher，andvoluntarilyandfreelydoessheenteruponthisengagement。Shesupportshernewconditionwithcourage，becauseshechoseit。AsinAmericapaternaldisciplineisveryrelaxedandtheconjugaltieverystrict，ayoungwomandoesnotcontractthelatterwithoutconsiderablecircumspectionandapprehension。Precociousmarriagesarerare。ThusAmericanwomendonotmarryuntiltheirunderstandingsareexercisedandripened;whereasinothercountriesmostwomengenerallyonlybegintoexerciseandtoripentheirunderstandingsaftermarriage。
Ibynomeanssuppose，however，thatthegreatchangewhichtakesplaceinallthehabitsofwomenintheUnitedStates，assoonastheyaremarried，oughtsolelytobeattributedtotheconstraintofpublicopinion:itisfrequentlyimposeduponthemselvesbythesoleeffortoftheirownwill。Whenthetimeforchoosingahusbandisarrived，thatcoldandsternreasoningpowerwhichhasbeeneducatedandinvigoratedbythefreeobservationoftheworld，teachesanAmericanwomanthataspiritoflevityandindependenceinthebondsofmarriageisaconstantsubjectofannoyance，notofpleasure;ittellsherthattheamusementsofthegirlcannotbecometherecreationsofthewife，andthatthesourcesofamarriedwoman’shappinessareinthehomeofherhusband。Assheclearlydiscernsbeforehandtheonlyroadwhichcanleadtodomestichappiness，sheentersuponitatonce，andfollowsittotheendwithoutseekingtoturnback。
ThesamestrengthofpurposewhichtheyoungwivesofAmericadisplay，inbendingthemselvesatonceandwithoutrepiningtotheausteredutiesoftheirnewcondition，isnolessmanifestinallthegreattrialsoftheirlives。InnocountryintheworldareprivatefortunesmoreprecariousthanintheUnitedStates。Itisnotuncommonforthesameman，inthecourseofhislife，toriseandsinkagainthroughallthegradeswhichleadfromopulencetopoverty。Americanwomensupportthesevicissitudeswithcalmandunquenchableenergy:itwouldseemthattheirdesirescontract，aseasilyastheyexpand，withtheirfortunes。*a[Footnot...完整阅读请扫描二维码下载丁香书院APP免费看：
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