SomeknightwhohadfoughtintheFrenchwarsofthattime,andhadsurvivedhisbattlesandcomehometohisoldhalls,hadbeenstirredupbyhisconscience,orbywhatwasequivalentinthosedays,hisconfessor,tobuildandendowahospitalfortwelvedecayedsoldiers,andachapelwhereintheyweretoattendthedailymassesheordainedtobesaidtilltheendofalltime(whicheternitylastedrathermorethanacentury,prettywellforaneternitybespokenbyaman),forhissoulandthesoulsofthosewhomhehadslain。Therewasalargedivisionofthequadrangularbuildingsetapartforthepriestwhowastosaythesemasses;andtowatchoverthewell—beingofthebedesmen。Inprocessofyearstheoriginandprimarypurposeofthehospitalhadbeenforgottenbyallexceptingthelocalantiquaries;
andtheplaceitselfcametoberegardedasaverypleasantquaintsetofalmshouses;andthewarden'soffice(hewhoshouldhavesaidorsunghisdailymasseswasnowcalledthewarden,andreaddailyprayersandpreachedasermononSundays)anagreeablesinecure。AnotherlegacyofoldSirSimonBraywasthatofasmallcroftofland,therentorprofitsofwhichweretogotowardsgivingtoallwhoaskedforitamanchetofbreadandacupofgoodbeer。Thisbeerwas,soSirSimonordained,tobemadeafteracertainreceiptwhichheleft,inwhichgroundivytooktheplaceofhops。Butthereceipt,aswellasthemasses,wasmodernizedaccordingtotheprogressoftime。Philipstoodunderagreatbroadstonearchway;theback—doorintothewarden'shousewasontherightside;akindofbuttery—hatchwasplacedbytheporter'sdoorontheoppositeside。Aftersomeconsideration,Philipknockedattheclosedshutter,andthesignalseemedtobewellunderstood。
Heheardamovementwithin;thehatchwasdrawnaside,andhisbreadandbeerwerehandedtohimbyapleasant—lookingoldman,whoprovedhimselfnotatalldisinclinedforconversation。'Youmaysitdownonyonderbench,'saidhe。'Nay,man!siti'thesun,forit'sachillyplace,this,andthenyoucanlookthroughthegrateandwatchth'oldfellowstoddlingaboutinth'quad。'PhilipsatdownwherethewarmOctobersunslanteduponhim,andlookedthroughtheironrailingatthepeacefulsight。Agreatsquareofvelvetlawn,intersecteddiagonallywithbroadflag—pavedwalks,thesamekindofwalkgoingallroundthequadrangle;lowtwo—storiedbrickhouses,tintedgrayandyellowbyage,andinmanyplacesalmostcoveredwithvines,Virginiancreepers,andmonthlyroses;beforeeachhousealittleplotofgardenground,brightwithflowers,andevidentlytendedwiththeutmostcare;onthefarthersidethemassivechapel;hereandthereanoldorinfirmmansunninghimself,orleisurelydoingabitofgardening,ortalkingtooneofhiscomrades——theplacelookedasifcareandwant,andevensorrow,werelockedoutandexcludedbytheponderousgatethroughwhichPhilipwasgazing。'It'saniceenoughplace,bean'tit?'saidtheporter,interpretingPhilip'slooksprettyaccurately。'Leastways,forthemaslikesit。I'vegotabitwearyonitmyself;it'ssofarfromth'world,asamanmaysay;notadecentpublicwithinamileandahalf,whereonecanhearabito'newsofanevening。''IthinkIcouldmakemyselfverycontenthere,'repliedPhilip。'That'stosay,ifonewereeasyinone'smind。''Ay,ay,myman。That'siteverywhere。Why,Idon'tthinkthatIcouldenjoymyself——notevenatth'WhiteHart,wheretheygiveyouasgoodaglassofalefortwopenceasanywherei'th'fourkingdoms——Icouldn't,tosay,flavourmyaleeventhere,ifmyoldwomanlaya—dying;whichisasignasit'stheheart,andnottheale,asmakesthedrink。'Justthenthewarden'sback—dooropened,andoutcamethewardenhimself,dressedinfullclericalcostume。Hewasgoingintotheneighbouringcity,buthestoppedtospeaktoPhilip,thewoundedsoldier;andallthemorereadilybecausehisoldfadeduniformtoldthewarden'sexperiencedeyethathehadbelongedtothemarines。'IhopeyouenjoythevictualprovidedforyoubythefounderofSt。Sepulchre,'
saidhe,kindly。'Youlookbutpoorly,mygoodfellow,andasifasliceofgoodcoldmeatwouldhelpyourbreaddown。''Thankyou,sir!'saidPhilip。'I'mnothungry,onlyweary,andgladofadraughtofbeer。''You'vebeenintheMarines,Isee。Wherehaveyoubeenserving?''IwasatthesiegeofAcre,lastMay,sir。''AtAcre!Wereyou,indeed?ThenperhapsyouknowmyboyHarry?Hewasinthe————th。''Itwasmycompany,'saidPhilip,warmingupalittle。Lookingbackuponhissoldier'slife,itseemedtohimtohavemanycharms,becauseitwassofullofsmalldailyinterests。'Then,didyouknowmyson,LieutenantPennington?''Itwashethatgavemethiscloak,sir,whentheyweresendingmebacktoEngland。IhadbeenhisservantforashorttimebeforeIwaswoundedbytheexplosiononboardtheTheseus,andhesaidIshouldfeelthecoldofthevoyage。He'sverykind;andI'veheardsayhepromisestobeafirst—rateofficer。''Youshallhaveasliceofroastbeef,whetheryouwantitornot,'saidthewarden,ringingthebellathisownback—door。'Irecognizethecloaknow——theyoungscamp!Howsoonhehasmadeitshabby,though,'hecontinued,takingupacornerwheretherewasanimmensetearnottoowellbotchedup。'AndsoyouwereonboardtheTheseusatthetimeoftheexplosion?
Bringsomecoldmeathereforthegoodman——orstay!Comeinwithme,andthenyoucantellMrsPenningtonandtheyoungladiesallyouknowaboutHarry,——andthesiege,——andtheexplosion。'SoPhilipwasusheredintothewarden'shouseandmadetoeatroastbeefalmostagainsthiswill;andhewasquestionedandcross—questionedbythreeeagerladies,allatthesametime,asitseemedtohim。Hehadgivenallpossibledetailsonthesubjectsaboutwhichtheywerecurious;andwasbeginningtoconsiderhowhecouldbestmakehisretreat,whentheyoungerMissPenningtonwentuptoherfather——whohadallthistimestood,withhishaton,holdinghiscoat—tailsoverhisarms,withhisbacktothefire。Hebenthiseardownaverylittletohearsomewhisperedsuggestionofhisdaughter's,noddedhishead,andthenwentonquestioningPhilip,withkindlyinquisitivenessandpatronage,astherichdoquestionthepoor。'Andwhereareyougoingtonow?'Philipdidnotanswerdirectly。Hewonderedinhisownmindwherehewasgoing。Atlengthhesaid,'Northwards,Ibelieve。ButperhapsIshallneverreachthere。''Haven'tyoufriends?Aren'tyougoingtothem?'Therewasagainapause;acloudcameoverPhilip'scountenance。Hesaid,'No!I'mnotgoingtomyfriends。Idon'tknowthatI'vegotanyleft。'Theyinterpretedhislooksandthisspeechtomeanthathehadeitherlosthisfriendsbydeath,oroffendedthembyenlisting。Thewardenwenton,'Iask,becausewe'vegotacottagevacantinthemead。OldDobson,whowaswithGeneralWolfeatthetakingofQuebec,diedafortnightago。Withsuchinjuriesasyours,Ifearyou'llneverbeabletoworkagain。Butwerequirestricttestimonialsastocharacter,'headded,withaspenetratingalookashecouldsummonupatPhilip。Philiplookedunmoved,eitherbytheofferofthecottage,ortheillusiontothepossibilityofhischaracternotbeingsatisfactory。Hewasgratefulenoughinreality,buttooheavyathearttocareverymuchwhatbecameofhim。Thewardenandhisfamily,whowereaccustomedtoconsiderasettlementatSt。Sepulchre'sasthesumofallgoodtoaworn—outsoldier,werealittleannoyedatPhilip'scoolwayofreceivingtheproposition。Thewardenwentontonamethecontingentadvantages。'Besidesthecottage,youwouldhavealoadofwoodforfiringonAllSaints',onChristmas,andonCandlemasdays——abluegownandsuitofclothestomatcheveryMichaelmas,andashillingadaytokeepyourselfinallotherthings。Yourdinneryouwouldhavewiththeothermen,inhall。''Thewardenhimselfgoesintohalleveryday,andseesthateverythingiscomfortable,andsaysgrace,'addedthewarden'slady。'IknowIseemstupid,'saidPhilip,almosthumbly,'nottobemoregrateful,forit'sfarbeyondwhatliverexpectedorthoughtforagain,andit'sagreattemptation,forI'mjustwornoutwithfatigue。SeveraltimesI'vethoughtImustliedownunderahedge,andjustdieforveryweariness。
ButonceIhadawifeandachildupinthenorth,'hestopped。'Andaretheydead?'askedoneoftheyoungladiesinasoftsympathizingtone。HereyesmetPhilip's,fullofdumbwoe。Hetriedtospeak;hewantedtoexplainmorefully,yetnottorevealthetruth。'Well!'saidthewarden,thinkingheperceivedtherealstateofthings,'whatIproposeisthis。YoushallgointooldDobson'shouseatonce,asakindofprobationarybedesman。I'llwritetoHarry,andgetyourcharacterfromhim。StephenFreemanIthinkyousaidyournamewas?BeforeIcanreceivehisreplyyou'llhavebeenabletotellhowyou'dlikethekindoflife;andatanyrateyou'llhavetherestyouseemtorequireinthemeantime。Yousee,ItakeHarry'shavinggivenyouthatcloakasakindofcharacter,'addedhe,smilingkindly。'Ofcourseyou'llhavetoconformtorulesjustlikealltherest,——chapelateight,dinnerattwelve,lightsoutatnine;butI'lltellyoutheremainderofourregulationsaswewalkacrossquadtoyournewquarters。'AndthusPhilip,almostinspiteofhimself,becameinstalledinabedesman'shouseatSt。Sepulchre。
chapter42CHAPTERXLIIAFABLEATFAULTPhiliptookpossessionofthetworoomswhichhadbelongedtothedeadSergeantDobson。Theywerefurnishedsufficientlyforeverycomfortbythetrusteesofthehospital。Somelittlefragmentsofornament,somesmallarticlespickedupindistantcountries,afewtatteredbooks,remainedintheroomsaslegaciesfromtheirformeroccupant。AtfirstthereposeofthelifeandtheplacewasinexpressiblygratefultoPhilip。Hehadalwaysshrunkfromencounteringstrangers,anddisplayinghisblackenedandscarredcountenancetothem,evenwheresuchdisfigurementwasmostregardedasamarkofhonour。InSt。Sepulchre'shemetnonebutthesamesetdayafterday,andwhenhehadoncetoldthetaleofhowithappenedandsubmittedtotheirgaze,itwasoverforever,ifhesominded。
Theslightemploymenthisgardengavehim——therewasakitchen—gardenbehindeachhouse,aswellastheflower—plotinfront——andthedailyarrangementofhisparlourandchamberwere,atthebeginningofhistimeofoccupation,asmuchbodilylabourashecouldmanage。TherewassomethingstatelyandutterlyremovedfromallPhilip'spreviousexistenceintheformsobservedateveryday'sdinner,whenthetwelvebedesmenmetinthelargequainthall,andthewardencameinhiscollege—capandgowntosaythelongLatingracewhichwoundupwithsomethingverylikeaprayerforthesoulofSirSimonBray。Ittooksometimetogetareplytoshiplettersinthosetimeswhennoonecouldexactlysaywherethefleetmightbefound。AndbeforeDrPenningtonhadreceivedtheexcellentcharacterofStephenFreeman,whichhissongladlysentinanswertohisfather'sinquiries,Philiphadbecomerestlessanduneasyinthemidstofallthispeaceandcomfort。Sittingaloneoverhisfireinthelongwinterevenings,thescenesofhispastliferosebeforehim;hischildhood;hisauntRobson'scareofhim;hisfirstgoingtoFoster'sshopinMonkshaven;HaytersbankFarm,andthespellinglessonsinthebrightwarmkitchenthere;Kinraid'sappearance;
themiserablenightoftheCorneys'party;thefarewellhehadwitnessedonMonkshavensands;thepress—gang,andallthelongconsequencesofthatactofconcealment;poorDanielRobson'strialandexecution;hisownmarriage;
hischild'sbirth;andthenhecametothatlastdayatMonkshaven:andhewentoverandoveragainthetorturingdetails,thelooksofcontemptandanger,thewordsofloathingindignation,tillhealmostbroughthimself,outofhisextremesympathywithSylvia,tobelievethathewasindeedthewretchshehadconsideredhimtobe。Heforgothisownexcusesforhavingactedashehaddone;thoughtheseexcuseshadatonetimeseemedtohimtowearthegarbofreasons。Afterlongthoughtandbittermemorycamesomewonder。WhatwasSylviadoingnow?Wherewasshe?Whatwashischildlike——hischildaswellashers?
Andthenherememberedthepoorfootsorewifeandthelittlegirlshecarriedinherarms,thatwasjusttheageofBella;hewishedhehadnoticedthatchildmore,thataclearvisionofitmightriseupwhenhewantedtopictureBella。Onenighthehadgoneroundthismill—wheelcircleofideastillhewaswearytotheverymarrowofhisbones。Toshakeoffthemonotonousimpressionherosetolookforabookamongsttheoldtatteredvolumes,hopingthathemightfindsomethingthatwouldsufficientlylayholdofhimtochangethecurrentofhisthoughts。TherewasanoddvolumeofPeregrinePickle,abookofsermons;halfanarmylistof1774,andtheSevenChampionsofChristendom。Philiptookupthislast,whichhehadneverseenbefore。
InithereadhowSirGuy,EarlofWarwick,wenttofightthePayniminhisowncountry,andwasawayforsevenlongyears;andwhenhecamebackhisownwifePhillis,thecountessinhercastle,didnotknowthepoortravel—wornhermit,whocamedailytoseekhisdoleofbreadatherhandsalongwithmanybeggarsandmuchpoor。Butatlast,whenhelaya—dyinginhiscaveintherock,hesentforherbyasecretsignknownbuttothemtwain。Andshecamewithgreatspeed,forsheknewitwasherlordwhohadsentforher;andtheyhadmanysweetandholywordstogetherbeforehegaveuptheghost,hisheadlyingonherbosom。TheoldstoryknowntomostpeoplefromtheirchildhoodwasallnewandfreshtoPhilip。Hedidnotquitebelieveinthetruthofit,becausethefictitiousnatureofthehistoriesofsomeoftheotherChampionsofChristendomwastoopatent。Buthecouldnothelpthinkingthatthisonemightbetrue;
andthatGuyandPhillismighthavebeenasrealfleshandblood,long,longago,asheandSylviahadevenbeen。Theoldroom,thequietmoonlitquadrangleintowhichthecross—barredcasementlooked,thequaintaspectofeverythingthathehadseenforweeksandweeks;allthispredisposedPhiliptodwelluponthestoryhehadjustbeenreadingasafaithfullegendoftwoloverswhoseboneswerelongsincedust。HethoughtthatifhecouldthusseeSylvia,himselfunknown,unseen——couldliveathergates,sotospeak,andgazeuponherandhischild——somedaytoo,whenhelaya—dying,hemightsendforher,andinsoftwordsofmutualforgivenessbreathehislifeawayinherarms。Orperhaps————andsohelosthimself,andfromthinking,passedontodreaming。AllnightlongGuyandPhillis,Sylviaandhischild,passedinandoutofhisvisions;itwasimpossibletomakethefragmentsofhisdreamscohere;buttheimpressionmadeuponhimbythemwasnotthelessstrongforthis。HefeltasifhewerecalledtoMonkshaven,wantedatMonkshaven,andtoMonkshavenheresolvedtogo;
althoughwhenhisreasonovertookhisfeeling,heknewperfectlyhowunwiseitwastoleaveahomeofpeaceandtranquillityandsurroundingfriendliness,togotoaplacewherenothingbutwantandwretchednessawaitedhimunlesshemadehimselfknown,andifhedid,adeeperwant,amorewoefulwretchedness,wouldinallprobabilitybehisportion。Inthesmalloblongoflooking—glasshungagainstthewall,Philipcaughtthereflectionofhisownface,andlaughedscornfullyatthesight。Thethinhairlayuponhistemplesintheflakesthatbetokenlongill—health;
hiseyeswerethesameasever,andtheyhadalwaysbeenconsideredthebestfeatureinhisface;buttheyweresunkintheirorbits,andlookedhollowandgloomy。Asforthelowerpartofhisface,blackened,contracted,drawnawayfromhisteeth,theoutlineentirelychangedbythebreakageofhisjaw—bone,hewasindeedafoolifhethoughthimselffittogoforthtowinbackthatlovewhichSylviahadforsworn。Asahermitandabeggar,hemustreturntoMonkshaven,andfallperforceintothesamepositionwhichGuyofWarwickhadonlyassumed。ButstillheshouldseehisPhillis,andmightfeasthissadhopelesseyesfromtimetotimewiththesightofhischild。Hissmallpensionofsixpenceadaywouldkeephimfromabsolutewantofnecessaries。SothatverydayhewenttothewardenandtoldhimhethoughtofgivinguphisshareinthebequestofSirSimonBray。Sucharelinquishmenthadneveroccurredbeforeinallthewarden'sexperience;andhewasverymuchinclinedtobeoffended。'ImustsaythatforamannottobesatisfiedasabedesmanofSt。Sepulchre'sarguesaverywrongstateofmind,andaveryungratefulheart。''I'msure,sir,it'snotfromanyingratitude,forIcanhardlyfeelthankfultoyouandtoSirSimon,andtomadam,andtheyoungladies,andallmycomradesinthehospital,andIniverexpecttobeeithersocomfortableorsopeacefulagain,but————''But?Whatcanyouhavetosayagainsttheplace,then?Notbutwhattherearealwaysplentyofapplicantsforeveryvacancy;onlyIthoughtIwasdoingakindnesstoamanoutofHarry'scompany。Andyou'llnotseeHarryeither;he'sgothisleaveinMarch!''I'mverysorry。Ishouldliketohaveseenthelieutenantagain。ButI
cannotrestanylongersofarawayfrom——peopleIonceknew。''Tentoonethey'redead,orremoved,orsomethingorotherbythistime;
andit'llserveyourightiftheyare。Mind!noonecanbechosentwicetobeabedesmanofSt。Sepulchre's。'Thewardenturnedaway;andPhilip,uneasyatstaying,disheartenedatleaving,wenttomakehisfewpreparationsforsettingoutoncemoreonhisjourneynorthwards。Hehadtogivenoticeofhischangeofresidencetothelocaldistributorofpensions;andoneortwofarewellshadtobetaken,withmorethanusualsadnessatthenecessity;forPhilip,underhisnameofStephenFreeman,hadattachedsomeoftheolderbedesmenagooddealtohim,fromhisunselfishness,hiswillingnesstoreadtothem,andtorenderthemmanylittleservices,and,perhaps,asmuchasanything,byhishabitualsilence,whichmadehimaconvenientrecipientofalltheirgarrulousness。Sobeforethetimeforhisdeparturecame,hehadtheopportunityofonemoreinterviewwiththewarden,ofamorefriendlycharacterthanthatinwhichhegaveuphisbedesmanship。Andsofaritwaswell;andPhilipturnedhisbackuponSt。Sepulchre'swithhissoreheartpartlyhealedbyhisfourmonths'residencethere。Hewasstronger,too,inbody,morecapableoftheday—after—daywalksthatwererequiredofhim。Hehadsavedsomemoneyfromhisallowanceasbedesmanandfromhispension,andmightoccasionallyhavetakenanoutsideplaceonacoach,haditnotbeenthatheshrankfromthefirstlookofeverystrangeruponhisdisfiguredface。Yetthegentle,wistfuleyes,andthewhiteandfaultlessteethalwaysdidawaywiththefirstimpressionassoonaspeoplebecamealittleacquaintedwithhisappearance。ItwasFebruarywhenPhilipleftSt。Sepulchre's。ItwasthefirstweekinAprilwhenhebegantorecognizethefamiliarobjectsbetweenYorkandMonkshaven。Andnowhebegantohangback,andtoquestionthewisdomofwhathehaddone——justasthewardenhadprophesiedthathewould。Thelastnightofhistwohundredmilewalkhesleptatthelittleinnatwhichhehadbeenenlistednearlytwoyearsbefore。Itwasbynointentionofhisthatherestedatthatidenticalplace。Nightwasdrawingon;and,inmaking,ashethought,ashortcut,hehadmissedhisway,andwasfaintoseekshelterwherehemightfindit。Butitbroughthimverystraightfacetofacewithhislifeatthattime,andeversince。Hismad,wildhopes——halftheresultofintoxication,ashenowknew——alldeadandgone;
thecareerthenfreshlyopeningshutupagainsthimnow;hisyouthfulstrengthandhealthchangedintoprematureinfirmity,andthehomeandthelovethatshouldhaveopenedwideitsdoorstoconsolehimforall,whyintwoyearsDeathmighthavebeenbusy,andtakenawayfromhimhislastfeeblechanceofthefainthappinessofseeinghisbelovedwithoutbeingseenorknownofher。Allthatnightandallthenextday,thefearofSylvia'spossibledeathovercloudedhisheart。Itwasstrangethathehadhardlyeverthoughtofthisbefore;sostrange,thatnow,whentheterrorcame,ittookpossessionofhim,andhecouldalmosthaveswornthatshemustbelyingdeadinMonkshavenchurchyard。OrwasitlittleBella,thatblooming,lovelybabe,whomhewasnevertoseeagain?Therewasthetollingofmournfulbellsinthedistantairtohisdisturbedfancy,andthecryofthehappybirds,theplaintivebleatingofthenew—droppedlambs,wereallomensofevilimporttohim。Aswellashecould,hefoundhiswaybacktoMonkshaven,overthewildheightsandmoorshehadcrossedonthatblackdayofmisery;whyheshouldhavechosenthatpathhecouldnottell——itwasasifhewereled,andhadnofreewillofhisown。Thesoftcleareveningwasdrawingon,andhisheartbeatthick,andthenstopped,onlytostartagainwithfreshviolence。Therehewas,atthetopofthelong,steeplanethatwasinsomepartsaliteralstaircaseleadingdownfromthehill—topintotheHighStreet,throughtheveryentryupwhichhehadpassedwhenheshrankawayfromhisformerandhisthenpresentlife。Therehestood,lookingdownoncemoreatthenumerousirregularroofs,themanystacksofchimneysbelowhim,seekingoutthatwhichhadoncebeenhisowndwelling——whodwelttherenow?Theyellowergleamsgrewnarrower;theeveningshadowsbroader,andPhilipcreptdownthelaneaweary,woefulman。Ateverygapintheclose—packedbuildingsheheardthemerrymusicofaband,thecheerfulsoundofexcitedvoices。Stillhedescendedslowly,scarcelywonderingwhatitcouldbe,foritwasnotassociatedinhismindwiththeonepervadingthoughtofSylvia。WhenhecametotheangleofjunctionbetweenthelaneandtheHighStreet,heseemedplungedallatonceintotheverycentreofthebustle,andhedrewhimselfupintoacornerofdeepshadow,fromwhencehecouldlookoutuponthestreet。AcircuswasmakingitsgrandentryintoMonkshaven,withallthepompofcolourandofnoisethatitcouldmuster。Trumpetersinparti—colouredclothesrodefirst,blaringouttriumphantdiscord。Nextcameagold—and—scarletchariotdrawnbysixpiebaldhorses,andthewindingsofthisteamthroughthetortuousnarrowstreetwereprettyenoughtolookupon。Inthechariotsatekingsandqueens,heroesandheroines,orwhatweremeantforsuch;
allthelittleboysandgirlsrunningalongsideofthechariotenviedthem;
buttheythemselveswereverymuchtired,andshiveringwithcoldintheirheroicpompofclassicclothing。AllthisPhilipmighthaveseen;didsee,infact;butheedednotonejot。Almostoppositetohim,nottenyardsapart,standingontheraisedstepatthewell—knownshopdoor,wasSylvia,holdingachild,amerrydancingchild,upinherarmstoseetheshow。
Shetoo,Sylvia,waslaughingforpleasure,andforsympathywithpleasure。
SheheldthelittleBellaaloftthatthechildmightseethegaudyprocessionthebetterandthelonger,lookingatitherselfwithredlipsapartandwhiteteethglancingthrough;thensheturnedtospeaktosomeonebehindher——Coulson,asPhilipsawthemomentafterwards;hisanswermadeherlaughonceagain。Philipsawitall;herbonnycarelesslooks,herprettymatronlyform,herevidenteaseofmindandprosperousoutwardcircumstances。
Theyearsthathehadspentingloomysorrow,amongstwildscenes,onlandorbysea,hislifeinfrequentperilofabloodyend,hadgonebywithherlikesunnydays;allthemoresunnybecausehewasnotthere。Sobitterlythoughtthepoordisabledmarine,as,wearyanddespairing,hestoodinthecoldshadowandlookeduponthehomethatshouldhavebeenhishaven,thewifethatshouldhavewelcomedhim,thechildthatshouldhavebeenhiscomfort。Hehadbanishedhimselffromhishome;hiswifehadforswornhim;hischildwasblossomingintointelligenceunwittingofanyfather。
Wife,andchild,andhome,werealldoingwellwithouthim;whatmadnesshadtemptedhimthither?anhourago,likeafancifulfool,hehadthoughtshemightbedead——deadwithsadpenitenceforhercruelwordsatherheart——withmournfulwonderattheunaccounted—forabsenceofherchild'sfatherpreyingonherspirits,andinsomemeasurecausingthedeathhehadapprehended。
Buttolookathertherewhereshestood,itdidnotseemasifshehadhadanhour'spainfulthoughtinallherbloominglife。Ay!gointothewarmhearth,motherandchild,nowthegaycavalcadehasgoneoutofsight,andthechillofnighthassucceededtothesun'ssetting。
Husbandandfather,stealoutintothecolddarkstreet,andseeksomepoorcheaplodgingwhereyoumayrestyourwearybones,andcheatyourmorewearyheartintoforgetfulnessinsleep。TheprettystoryoftheCountessPhillis,whomournedforherhusband'sabsencesolong,isafableofoldtimes;orrathersayEarlGuyneverweddedhiswife,knowingthatoneshelovedbetterthanhimwasaliveallthetimeshehadbelievedhimtobedead。
chapter43CHAPTERXLIIITHEUNKNOWNAfewdaysbeforethatonwhichPhiliparrivedatMonkshaven,KesterhadcometopaySylviaavisit。Astheearliestfriendshehad,andalsoasonewhoknewtherealsecretsofherlife,Sylviaalwaysgavehimthewarmwelcome,thecordialwords,andthesweetlooksinwhichtheoldmandelighted。
Hehadasortofdelicacyofhisownwhichkepthimfromgoingtoseehertoooften,evenwhenhewasstationaryatMonkshaven;buthelookedforwardtothetimeswhenheallowedhimselfthispleasureasachildatschoollooksforwardtoitsholidays。ThetimeofhisserviceatHaytersbankhad,onthewhole,beenthehappiestinailhislongmonotonousyearsofdailylabour。Sylvia'sfatherhadalwaystreatedhimwiththeroughkindnessoffellowship;Sylvia'smotherhadneverstintedhiminhismeatorgrudgedhimhisshareofthebestthatwasgoing;andonce,whenhewasillforafewdaysintheloftabovethecow—house,shehadmadehimpossets,andnursedhimwiththesametendernesswhichherememberedhismothershowingtohimwhenhewasalittlechild,butwhichhehadneverexperiencedsincethen。HehadknownSylviaherself,asbud,andsweetpromiseofblossom;
andjustasshewasopeningintothefull—blownrose,and,ifshehadbeenhappyandprosperous,mighthavepassedoutofthenarrowcircleofKester'sinterests,onesorrowafteranothercamedownuponherprettyinnocenthead,andKester'speriodofservicetoDanielRobson,herfather,wastragicallycutshort。AllthismadeSylviathegreatcentreofthefaithfulherdsman'saffection;andBella,whoremindedhimofwhatSylviawaswhenfirstKesterknewher,onlyoccupiedthesecondplaceinhisheart,althoughtothechildhewasmuchmoredemonstrativeofhisregardthantothemother。HehaddressedhimselfinhisSundaybest,andalthoughitwasonlyThursday,hadforestalledhisSaturday'sshaving;hehadprovidedhimselfwithapaperofhumbugsforthechild——'humbugs'beingthenorth—countrytermforcertainlumpsoftoffy,well—flavouredwithpeppermint——andnowhesatintheaccustomedchair,asneartothedoorasmightbe,inSylvia'spresence,coaxingthelittleone,whowasnotquitesureofhisidentity,t9cometohim,byopeningthepaperparcel,andlettingitssweetcontentsbeseen。'She'slikethee——andyetshefavoursherfeyther,'saidhe;andthemomenthehadutteredtheincautiouswordshelookeduptoseehowSylviahadtakentheunpremeditated,unusualreferencetoherhusband。Hisstealthyglancedidnotmeethereye;butthoughhethoughtshehadcolouredalittle,shedidnotseemoffendedashehadfeared。ItwastruethatBellahadherfather'sgrave,thoughtful,darkeyes,insteadofhermother'sgreyones,outofwhichthechildlikeexpressionofwonderwouldneverentirelypassaway。AndasBellaslowlyandhalfdistrustfullymadeherwaytowardsthetemptationofferedher,shelookedatKesterwithjustherfather'slook。Sylviasaidnothingindirectreply;Kesteralmostthoughtshecouldnothaveheardhim。But,by—and—by,shesaid,——'Yo'llhavehearedhowKinraid——who'sacaptainnow,andagrandofficer——hasgoneandgotmarried。''Nay!'saidKester,ingenuinesurprise。'Heniverhas,forsure!''Ay,buthehas,'saidSylvia。'AndI'msureIdunnotseewhyheshouldn't。''Well,well!'saidKester,notlookingupather,forhecaughttheinflectionsinthetonesofhervoice。'Hewereafinestirrin'chap,yon;an'hewereallaysfordoin'summut;an'whenhefundashecouldn'tha'onethingashe'dsethismindon,areckonhethoughthemunputupwi'another。''It'udbeno"puttingup,"'saidSylvia。'ShewerestayingatBessyDawson's,andshecomeheretoseeme——she'sasprettyayoungladyasyo'dseeonasummer'sday;andareallady,too,wi'afortune。Shedidn'tspeaktwowordswi'outbringinginherhusband'sname——"thecaptain,"asshecalledhim。''An'shecometoseethee?'saidKester,cockinghiseyeatSylviawiththeoldshrewdlook。'Thatweresummutqueer,weren'tit?'Sylviareddenedagooddeal。'He'stoofausetohavespokentoheronme,int'oldway,——asheusedfort'speaktome。IwerenoughttoherbutPhilip'swife。''An'whatt'dickinshadshetodowi'Philip?'askedKester,inintensesurprise;andsoabsorbedincuriositythatheletthehumbugsallfalloutofthepaperuponthefloor,andthelittleBellasatdown,plump,inthemidstoftreasuresasgreatasthosefabledtoexistonTomTiddler'sground。Sylviawasagainsilent;butKester,knowingherwell,wassurethatshewasstrugglingtospeak,andbidedhistimewithoutrepeatinghisquestion。'Shesaid——andIthinkhertaleweretrue,thoughIcannotgettot'rightsonit,thinkonitasIwill——asPhilipsavedherhusband'slifesomewheerenearaboutstoJerusalem。Shewouldhaveitthatt'captain——forIthinkI'llniverca'himKinraidagain——wasinagreatbattle,andwerenearuponbeingshotbyt'French,whenPhilip——ourPhilip——comeupandwentrightintot'fireo't'guns,andsavedherhusband'slife。Andshespokeasifbothsheandt'captainweremorebeholdentoPhilipthanwordscouldtell。Andshecometoseeme,totryandgetnewsonhim。'It'saqueerkindo'story,'saidKester,meditatively。'Ashouldha'
thoughtasPhilipweremorelikelytoha'gi'enhimashoveintot'thickonit,thant'helphimouto't'scrape。''Nay!'saidSylvia,suddenlylookingstraightatKester;'yo'reouttheere。
Philiphadadealo'goodinhim。AndIdunnotthinkashe'dha'goneandmarriedanotherwomansosoon,ifhe'dbeeni'Kinraid'splace。''An'yo'veniverhearedonPhilipsin'heleft?'askedKester,afterawhile。'Niver;noughtbutwhatshetoldme。Andshesaidthatt'captainmadeinquiryforhimrightandleft,assoonafterthathappenedasmightbe,andcouldhearniverawordabouthim。Noonehadseenhim,orknowedhisname。''Yo'niverhearedofhisgoin'fort'beasoldier?'perseveredKester。'Niver。I'vetoldyo'once。ItwereunlikePhiliptothinko'suchathing。''Butthoumunha'beenthinkin'onhimattimesi'a'theseyears。Badashe'dbehavedhissel',heweret'feythero'thylittleun。Whatdidtathinkhehadbeenagaitonwhenhelefthere?''Ididn'tknow。Iwerenoanesokeena—thinkingonhimatfirst。Itriedtoputhimouto'mythoughts。a'together,foritmademelikemadtothinkhowhe'dstoodbetweenmeand——thatother。ButI'dbeguntowonderandtowonderabouthim,andtothinkIshouldliketohearasheweredoingwell。IreckonIthoughthewerei'London,wheerehe'dbeenthattimeafore,yo'know,andhadallaysspokeasifhe'denjoyedhissel'tolerable;
andthenMollyBruntontoldmeont'otherone'smarriage;and,somehow,itgavemeashakeinmyheart,andIbeganfortowishIhadn'tsaidallthemwordsi'mypassion;andthenthatfineyoungladycomewi'herstory——andI'vethoughtadealonitsince,——andmymindhascomeoutclear。Philip'sdead,anditwerehisspiritascometot'other'shelpinhistimeo'
need。I'veheardfeythersayasspiritscannotresti'theirgravesfortryingtoundot'wrongsthey'vedonei'theirbodies。''Them'smyconclusions,'saidKester,solemnly。'Awasfainfortohearwhatwereyo'rjudgmentsfirst;butthem'stheconclusionsIcomedtoassoonasIheardt'tale。''Letalonethatonething,'saidSylvia,'hewereakind,goodman。''Itwereabigdealona"onething,"though,'saidKester。'Itjustspoiltyo'rlife,mypoorlass;an'mightha'goneneartospoilin'CharleyKinraid'stoo。''Mentakesadealmorenorwomentospoiltheirlives,'saidSylvia,bitterly。'Nota'mak'o'men。Ireckon,lass,Philip'slifewereprettywellonforbein'spoiltatafterhelefthere;anditweremebbe,agoodthinghegotridonitsosoon。''IwishI'djusthadafewkindwordswi'him,Ido,'saidSylvia,almostonthepointofcrying。'Come,lass,it'sasillmoanin'afterwhat'spastasit'udbeformet'fillmyeyeswi'weepin'aftert'humbugsasthislittlewencho'thinehasgrubbedupwhilstwe'nbeentalkin'。Why,there'snotoneon'emleft!''She'sasadspoiltlittlepuss!'saidSylvia,holdingoutherarmstothechild,whoranintothem,andbeganpattinghermother'scheeks,andpullingatthesoftbrowncurlstuckedawaybeneaththematronlycap。'Mammyspoilsher,andHesterspoilsher————''GrannyRosedoesn'tspoilme,'saidthechild,withquick,intelligentdiscrimination,interruptinghermother'slist。'No;butJeremiahFosterdoesaboveabit。He'llcomeinfro't'Bank,Kester,andaskforher,a'mostiveryday。Andhe'llbringherthingsinhispocket;andshe'ssofause,sheallaysgoesstraighttopeepin,andthenheshiftst'appleort'toyintoanother。Eh!butshe'salittlefauseone,'——halfdevouringthechildwithherkisses。'Andhecomesandtakesherawalkoftentimes,andhegoesasslowasifhewerequiteanoldman,tokeeppacewi'Bella'ssteps。Ioftenrunupstairsandwatch'emouto't'window;hedoesn'tcaretohavemewith'em,he'ssofaint'havet'childalltohisself。''She'sabonnyun,forsure,'saidKester;'butnotsoprettyasthouwas,Sylvie。A'venivertell'dtheewhatacomefortho',andit'sabouttimeformet'begoin'。A'mofftot'Cheviotsto—morrowmornt'fetchhomesomesheepasJonasBlundellhaspurchased。It'llbeajobo'betternortwomonthsareckon。''It'llbeanicetimeo'year,'saidSylvia,alittlesurprisedatKester'sevidentdiscouragementattheprospectofthejourneyorabsence;hehadoftenbeenawayfromMonks—havenforalongertimewithoutseemingtocaresomuchaboutit。'Well,yo'seeit'sabitharduponmefort'leavemysistersheasist'widow—woman,wheereaputupwhena'mathome。Thingsismainan'dear;
four—poundloavesisatsixteenpence;an'there'sadealo'talkonafaminei't'land;an'whatenapaidformyvictualan't'bedi't'lean—tohelpedt'oudwomanabit,——an'she'ssadlydowni't'mouth,forshecannothearonalodgerfort'tak'myplace,fora'she'smovedo'ertot'othersideo't'bridgefort'benearert'newbuildings,an't'grandnewwalkthey'remakin'roundt'cliffsthinkin'she'dbelikeliert'pickupalaboureraswouldbegladonabednearhiswork。A'dha'likedtoha'setheragaitwi'a'sponsiblelodgeraforea'dha'left,forshe'sjustsosoft—hearted,anyscampmayputuponherifhenobbutgetshoudonherblindside。''CanIhelpher?'saidSylvia,inhereagerway。'Ishouldbesoglad;
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