Thefellowsathistablestoodup。Hestoodupandpassedoutamongtheminthefile。Hehadtodecide。Hewascomingnearthedoor。Ifhewentonwiththefellowshecouldnevergouptotherectorbecausehecouldnotleavetheplaygroundforthat。AndifhewentandwaspandiedallthesameallthefellowswouldmakefunandtalkaboutyoungDedalusgoinguptotherectortotellontheprefectofstudies。
Hewaswalkingdownalongthemattingandhesawthedoorbeforehim。
Itwasimpossible:hecouldnot。Hethoughtofthebaldyheadoftheprefectofstudieswiththecruelno-colouredeyeslookingathimandheheardthevoiceoftheprefectofstudiesaskinghimtwicewhathisnamewas。
Whycouldhenotrememberthenamewhenhewastoldthefirsttime?Washenotlisteningthefirsttimeorwasittomakefunoutofthename?
Thegreatmeninthehistoryhadnameslikethatandnobodymadefunofthem。Itwashisownnamethatheshouldhavemadefunofifhewantedtomakefun。Dolan:itwaslikethenameofawomanwhowashedclothes。
Hehadreachedthedoorand,turningquicklyuptotheright,walkedupthestairsand,beforehecouldmakeuphismindtocomeback,hehadenteredthelowdarknarrowcorridorthatledtothecastle。Andashecrossedthethresholdofthedoorofthecorridorhesaw,withoutturninghisheadtolook,thatallthefellowswerelookingafterhimastheywentfilingby。
Hepassedalongthenarrowdarkcorridor,passinglittledoorsthatwerethedoorsoftheroomsofthecommunity。Hepeeredinfrontofhimandrightandleftthroughthegloomandthoughtthatthosemustbeportraits。
Itwasdarkandsilentandhiseyeswereweakandtiredwithtearssothathecouldnotsee。Buthethoughttheyweretheportraitsofthesaintsandgreatmenoftheorderwhowerelookingdownonhimsilentlyashepassed:saintIgnatiusLoyolaholdinganopenbookandpointingtothewordsAdMajoremDeiGloriaminit;saintFrancisXavierpointingtohischest;LorenzoRicciwithhisberrettaonhisheadlikeoneoftheprefectsofthelines,thethreepatronsofholyyouth-saintStanislausKostka,saintAloysiusGonzago,andBlessedJohnBerchmans,allwithyoungfacesbecausetheydiedwhentheywereyoung,andFatherPeterKennysittinginachairwrappedinabigcloak。
Hecameoutonthelandingabovetheentrancehallandlookedabouthim。ThatwaswhereHamiltonRowanhadpassedandthemarksofthesoldiers'
slugswerethere。Anditwastherethattheoldservantshadseentheghostinthewhitecloakofamarshal。
Anoldservantwassweepingattheendofthelanding。Heaskedhimwherewastherector'sroomandtheoldservantpointedtothedooratthefarendandlookedafterhimashewentontoitandknocked。
Therewasnoanswer。Heknockedagainmoreloudlyandhisheartjumpedwhenheheardamuffledvoicesay:——
Comein!
Heturnedthehandleandopenedthedoorandfumbledforthehandleofthegreenbaizedoorinside。Hefounditandpusheditopenandwentin。
Hesawtherectorsittingatadeskwriting。Therewasaskullonthedeskandastrangesolemnsmellintheroomliketheoldleatherofchairs。
Hisheartwasbeatingfastonaccountofthesolemnplacehewasinandthesilenceoftheroom:andhelookedattheskullandattherector'skind-lookingface——
Well,mylittleman,saidtherector,whatisit?
Stephenswalloweddownthethinginhisthroatandsaid:——
Ibrokemyglasses,sir。
Therectoropenedhismouthandsaid:——
O!
Thenhesmiledandsaid:——
Well,ifwebrokeourglasseswemustwritehomeforanewpair——
Iwrotehome,sir,saidStephen,andFatherArnallsaidIamnottostudytilltheycome——
Quiteright!saidtherector。
Stephenswalloweddownthethingagainandtriedtokeephislegsandhisvoicefromshaking——
But,sir——
Yes?——
FatherDolancameintodayandpandiedmebecauseIwasnotwritingmytheme。
Therectorlookedathiminsilenceandhecouldfeelthebloodrisingtohisfaceandthetearsabouttorisetohiseyes。
Therectorsaid:——
YournameisDedalus,isn'tit?——
Yes,sir——Andwheredidyoubreakyourglasses?——
Onthecinder-path,sir。AfellowwascomingoutofthebicyclehouseandIfellandtheygotbroken。Idon'tknowthefellow'sname。
Therectorlookedathimagaininsilence。Thenhesmiledandsaid:——
O,well,itwasamistake;IamsureFatherDolandidnotknow——
ButItoldhimIbrokethem,sir,andhepandiedme——
Didyoutellhimthatyouhadwrittenhomeforanewpair?therectorasked——
No,sir——
Owellthen,saidtherector,FatherDolandidnotunderstand。YoucansaythatIexcuseyoufromyourlessonsforafewdays。
Stephensaidquicklyforfearhistremblingwouldpreventhim:——
Yes,sir,butFatherDolansaidhewillcomeintomorrowtopandymeagainforit——
Verywell,therectorsaid,itisamistakeandIshallspeaktoFatherDolanmyself。Willthatdonow?
Stephenfeltthetearswettinghiseyesandmurmured:——
Oyessir,thanks。
TherectorheldhishandacrossthesideofthedeskwheretheskullwasandStephen,placinghishandinitforamoment,feltacoolmoistpalm——
Gooddaynow,saidtherector,withdrawinghishandandbowing——
Goodday,sir,saidStephen。
Hebowedandwalkedquietlyoutoftheroom,closingthedoorscarefullyandslowly。
Butwhenhehadpassedtheoldservantonthelandingandwasagaininthelownarrowdarkcorridorhebegantowalkfasterandfaster。Fasterandfasterhehurriedonthroughthegloomexcitedly。Hebumpedhiselbowagainstthedoorattheendand,hurryingdownthestaircase,walkedquicklythroughthetwocorridorsandoutintotheair。
Hecouldhearthecriesofthefellowsontheplaygrounds。Hebrokeintoarunand,runningquickerandquicker,ranacrossthecinderpathandreachedthethirdlineplayground,panting。
Thefellowshadseenhimrunning。Theyclosedroundhiminaring,pushingoneagainstanothertohear——
Tellus!Tellus!——
Whatdidhesay?——
Didyougoin?
Whatdidhesay?——
Tellus!Tellus!
Hetoldthemwhathehadsaidandwhattherectorhadsaidand,whenhehadtoldthem,allthefellowsflungtheircapsspinningupintotheairandcried:——
Hurroo!
Theycaughttheircapsandsentthemupagainspinningsky-highandcriedagain:——
Hurroo!Hurroo!
Theymadeacradleoftheirlockedhandsandhoistedhimupamongthemandcarriedhimalongtillhestruggledtogetfree。Andwhenhehadescapedfromthemtheybrokeawayinalldirections,flingingtheircapsagainintotheairandwhistlingastheywentspinningupandcrying:——
Hurroo!
AndtheygavethreegroansforBaldyheadDolanandthreecheersforConmeeandtheysaidhewasthedecentestrectorthatwaseverinClongowes。
Thecheersdiedawayinthesoftgreyair。Hewasalone。Hewashappyandfree;buthewouldnotbeanywayproudwithFatherDolan。Hewouldbeveryquietandobedient:andhewishedthathecoulddosomethingkindforhimtoshowhimthathewasnotproud。
Theairwassoftandgreyandmildandeveningwascoming。Therewasthesmellofeveningintheair,thesmellofthefieldsinthecountrywheretheydiggedupturnipstopeelthemandeatthemwhentheywentoutforawalktoMajorBarton's,thesmelltherewasinthelittlewoodbeyondthepavilionwherethegallnutswere。
Thefellowswerepractisinglongshiesandbowlinglobsandslowtwisters。
Inthesoftgreysilencehecouldhearthebumpoftheballs:andfromhereandfromtherethroughthequietairthesoundofthecricketbats:
pick,pack,pock,puck:likedropsofwaterinafountainfallingsoftlyinthebrimmingbowl。
Chapter2UncleCharlessmokedsuchblacktwistthatatlasthisnephewsuggestedtohimtoenjoyhismorningsmokeinalittleouthouseattheendofthegarden——
Verygood,Simon。Allserene,Simon,saidtheoldmantranquilly。
Anywhereyoulike。Theouthousewilldomenicely:itwillbemoresalubrious——
Damnme,saidMrDedalusfrankly,ifIknowhowyoucansmokesuchvillainousawfultobacco。It'slikegunpowder,byGod——
It'sverynice,Simon,repliedtheoldman。Verycoolandmollifying。
Everymorning,therefore,uncleCharlesrepairedtohisouthousebutnotbeforehehadgreasedandbrushedscrupulouslyhisbackhairandbrushedandputonhistallhat。Whilehesmokedthebrimofhistallhatandthebowlofhispipewerejustvisiblebeyondthejambsoftheouthousedoor。
Hisarbour,ashecalledthereekingouthousewhichhesharedwiththecatandthegardentools,servedhimalsoasasounding-box:andeverymorninghehummedcontentedlyoneofhisfavouritesongs:O,twinemeabowerorBlueEyesandGoldenHairorTheGrovesofBlarneywhilethegreyandbluecoilsofsmokeroseslowlyfromhispipeandvanishedinthepureair。
DuringthefirstpartofthesummerinBlackrockuncleCharleswasStephen'sconstantcompanion。UncleCharleswasahaleoldmanwithawelltannedskin,ruggedfeaturesandwhitesidewhiskers。OnweekdayshedidmessagesbetweenthehouseinCarysfortAvenueandthoseshopsinthemainstreetofthetownwithwhichthefamilydealt。StephenwasgladtogowithhimontheseerrandsforuncleCharleshelpedhimveryliberallytohandfulsofwhateverwasexposedinopenboxesandbarrelsoutsidethecounter。
HewouldseizeahandfulofgrapesandsawdustorthreeorfourAmericanapplesandthrustthemgenerouslyintohisgrandnephew'shandwhiletheshopmansmileduneasily;and,onStephen'sfeigningreluctancetotakethem,hewouldfrownandsay:——
Takethem,sir。Doyouhearme,sir?They'regoodforyourbowels。
WhentheorderlisthadbeenbookedthetwowouldgoontotheparkwhereanoldfriendofStephen'sfather,MikeFlynn,wouldbefoundseatedonabench,waitingforthem。ThenwouldbeginStephen'srunroundthepark。MikeFlynnwouldstandatthegateneartherailwaystation,watchinhand,whileStephenranroundthetrackinthestyleMikeFlynnfavoured,hisheadhighlifted,hiskneeswellliftedandhishandsheldstraightdownbyhissides。Whenthemorningpracticewasoverthetrainerwouldmakehiscommentsandsometimesillustratethembyshufflingalongforayardorsocomicallyinanoldpairofbluecanvasshoes。AsmallringofwonderstruckchildrenandnursemaidswouldgathertowatchhimandlingerevenwhenheanduncleCharleshadsatdownagainandweretalkingathleticsandpolitics。ThoughhehadheardhisfathersaythatMikeFlynnhadputsomeofthebestrunnersofmoderntimesthroughhishandsStephenoftenglancedathistrainer'sflabbystubble-coveredface,asitbentoverthelongstainedfingersthroughwhichherolledhiscigarette,andwithpityatthemildlustrelessblueeyeswhichwouldlookupsuddenlyfromthetaskandgazevaguelyintothebluedistancewhilethelongswollenfingersceasedtheirrollingandgrainsandfibresoftobaccofellbackintothepouch。
OnthewayhomeuncleCharleswouldoftenpayavisittothechapeland,asthefontwasaboveStephen'sreach,theoldmanwoulddiphishandandthensprinklethewaterbrisklyaboutStephen'sclothesandontheflooroftheporch。Whileheprayedhekneltonhisredhandkerchiefandreadabovehisbreathfromathumbblackenedprayerbookwhereincatchwordswereprintedatthefootofeverypage。Stephenkneltathissiderespecting,thoughhedidnotshare,hispiety。Heoftenwonderedwhathisgrand-uncleprayedforsoseriously。PerhapsheprayedforthesoulsinpurgatoryorforthegraceofahappydeathorperhapsheprayedthatGodmightsendhimbackapartofthebigfortunehehadsquanderedinCork。
OnSundaysStephenwithhisfatherandhisgrand-uncletooktheirconstitutional。
Theoldmanwasanimblewalkerinspiteofhiscornsandoftentenortwelvemilesoftheroadwerecovered。ThelittlevillageofStillorganwasthepartingoftheways。EithertheywenttothelefttowardstheDublinmountainsoralongtheGoatstownroadandthenceintoDundrum,cominghomebySandyford。Trudgingalongtheroadorstandinginsomegrimywaysidepublichousehiseldersspokeconstantlyofthesubjectsnearertheirhearts,ofIrishpolitics,ofMunsterandofthelegendsoftheirownfamily,toallofwhichStephenlentanavidear。Wordswhichhedidnotunderstandhesaidoverandovertohimselftillhehadlearntthembyheart:andthroughthemhehadglimpsesoftherealworldaboutthem。Thehourwhenhetoowouldtakepartinthelifeofthatworldseemeddrawingnearandinsecrethebegantomakereadyforthegreatpartwhichhefeltawaitedhimthenatureofwhichheonlydimlyapprehended。
Hiseveningswerehisown;andheporedoveraraggedtranslationofTheCountofMonteCristo。Thefigureofthatdarkavengerstoodforthinhismindforwhateverhehadheardordivinedinchildhoodofthestrangeandterrible。Atnighthebuiltupontheparlourtableanimageofthewonderfulislandcaveoutoftransfersandpaperflowersandcolouredtissuepaperandstripsofthesilverandgoldenpaperinwhichchocolateiswrapped。Whenhehadbrokenupthisscenery,wearyofitstinsel,therewouldcometohismindthebrightpictureofMarseille,ofsunnytrellises,andofMercedes。
OutsideBlackrock,ontheroadthatledtothemountains,stoodasmallwhitewashedhouseinthegardenofwhichgrewmanyrosebushes:andinthishouse,hetoldhimself,anotherMercedeslived。Bothontheoutwardandonthehomewardjourneyhemeasureddistancebythislandmark:andinhisimaginationhelivedthroughalongtrainofadventures,marvellousasthoseinthebookitself,towardsthecloseofwhichthereappearedanimageofhimself,grownolderandsadder,standinginamoonlitgardenwithMercedeswhohadsomanyyearsbeforeslightedhislove,andwithasadlyproudgestureofrefusal,saying:——
Madam,Inevereatmuscatelgrapes。
HebecametheallyofaboynamedAubreyMillsandfoundedwithhimagangofadventurersintheavenue。Aubreycarriedawhistledanglingfromhisbuttonholeandabicyclelampattachedtohisbeltwhiletheothershadshortsticksthrustdaggerwisethroughtheirs。Stephen,whohadreadofNapoleon'splainstyleofdress,chosetoremainunadornedandtherebyheightenedforhimselfthepleasureoftakingcounselwithhislieutenantbeforegivingorders。Thegangmadeforaysintothegardensofoldmaidsorwentdowntothecastleandfoughtabattleontheshaggyweed-grownrocks,cominghomeafteritwearystragglerswiththestaleodoursoftheforeshoreintheirnostrilsandtherankoilsoftheseawrackupontheirhandsandintheirhair。
AubreyandStephenhadacommonmilkmanandoftentheydroveoutinthemilk-cartoCarrickmineswherethecowswereatgrass。Whilethemenweremilkingtheboyswouldtaketurnsinridingthetractablemareroundthefield。Butwhenautumncamethecowsweredrivenhomefromthegrass:
andthefirstsightofthefilthycowyardatStradbrookwithitsfoulgreenpuddlesandclotsofliquiddungandsteamingbrantroughs,sickenedStephen'sheart。Thecattlewhichhadseemedsobeautifulinthecountryonsunnydaysrevoltedhimandhecouldnotevenlookatthemilktheyyielded。
ThecomingofSeptemberdidnottroublehimthisyearforhewasnottobesentbacktoClongowes。ThepracticeintheparkcametoanendwhenMikeFlynnwentintohospital。Aubreywasatschoolandhadonlyanhourortwofreeintheevening。Thegangfellasunderandtherewerenomorenightlyforaysorbattlesontherocks。Stephensometimeswentroundwiththecarwhichdeliveredtheeveningmilkandthesechillydrivesblewawayhismemoryofthefilthofthecowyardandhefeltnorepugnanceatseeingthecowhairsandhayseedsonthemilkman'scoat。Wheneverthecardrewupbeforeahousehewaitedtocatchaglimpseofawellscrubbedkitchenorofasoftlylightedhallandtoseehowtheservantwouldholdthejugandhowshewouldclosethedoor。Hethoughtitshouldbeapleasantlifeenough,drivingalongtheroadseveryeveningtodelivermilk,ifhehadwarmglovesandafatbagofgingernutsinhispockettoeatfrom。Butthesameforeknowledgewhichhadsickenedhisheartandmadehislegssagsuddenlyasheracedroundthepark,thesameintuitionwhichhadmadehimglancewithmistrustathistrainer'sflabbystubble-coveredfaceasitbentheavilyoverhislongstainedfingers,dissipatedanyvisionofthefuture。InavaguewayheunderstoodthathisfatherwasintroubleandthatthiswasthereasonwhyhehimselfhadnotbeensentbacktoClongowes。
Forsometimehehadfelttheslightchangeinhishouse;andthosechangesinwhathehaddeemedunchangeableweresomanyslightshockstohisboyishconceptionoftheworld。Theambitionwhichhefeltastirattimesinthedarknessofhissoulsoughtnooutlet。Adusklikethatoftheouterworldobscuredhismindasheheardthemare'shoofsclatteringalongthetramtrackontheRockRoadandthegreatcanswayingandrattlingbehindhim。
HereturnedtoMercedesand,ashebroodeduponherimage,astrangeunrestcreptintohisblood。Sometimesafevergatheredwithinhimandledhimtorovealoneintheeveningalongthequietavenue。Thepeaceofthegardensandthekindlylightsinthewindowspouredatenderinfluenceintohisrestlessheart。Thenoiseofchildrenatplayannoyedhimandtheirsillyvoicesmadehimfeel,evenmorekeenlythanhehadfeltatClongowes,thathewasdifferentfromothers。Hedidnotwanttoplay。
Hewantedtomeetintherealworldtheunsubstantialimagewhichhissoulsoconstantlybeheld。Hedidnotknowwheretoseekitorhow,butapremonitionwhichledhimontoldhimthatthisimagewould,withoutanyovertactofhis,encounterhim。Theywouldmeetquietlyasiftheyhadknowneachotherandhadmadetheirtryst,perhapsatoneofthegatesorinsomemoresecretplace。Theywouldbealone,surroundedbydarknessandsilence:
andinthatmomentofsupremetendernesshewouldbetransfigured。
Hewouldfadeintosomethingimpalpableunderhereyesandtheninamomenthewouldbetransfigured。Weaknessandtimidityandinexperiencewouldfallfromhiminthatmagicmoment。
Twogreatyellowcaravanshadhaltedonemorningbeforethedoorandmenhadcometrampingintothehousetodismantleit。Thefurniturehadbeenhustledoutthroughthefrontgardenwhichwasstrewnwithwispsofstrawandropeendsandintothehugevansatthegate。Whenallhadbeensafelystowedthevanshadsetoffnoisilydowntheavenue:andfromthewindowoftherailwaycarriage,inwhichhehadsatwithhisred-eyedmother,StephenhadseenthemlumberingalongtheMerrionRoad。
TheparlourfirewouldnotdrawthateveningandMrDedalusrestedthepokeragainstthebarsofthegratetoattracttheflame。UncleCharlesdozedinacornerofthehalffurnisheduncarpetedroomandnearhimthefamilyportraitsleanedagainstthewall。Thelamponthetableshedaweaklightovertheboardedfloor,muddiedbythefeetofthevan-men。
Stephensatonafootstoolbesidehisfatherlisteningtoalongandincoherentmonologue。Heunderstoodlittleornothingofitatfirstbuthebecameslowlyawarethathisfatherhadenemiesandthatsomefightwasgoingtotakeplace。Hefelt,too,thathewasbeingenlistedforthefight,thatsomedutywasbeinglaiduponhisshoulders。ThesuddenflightfromthecomfortandreveryofBlackrock,thepassagethroughthegloomyfoggycity,thethoughtofthebarecheerlesshouseinwhichtheywerenowtolivemadehisheartheavy,andagainanintuition,aforeknowledgeofthefuturecametohim。Heunderstoodalsowhytheservantshadoftenwhisperedtogetherinthehallandwhyhisfatherhadoftenstoodonthehearthrugwithhisbacktothefire,talkingloudlytouncleCharleswhourgedhimtositdownandeathisdinner——
There'sacrackofthewhipleftinmeyet,Stephen,oldchap,saidMrDedalus,pokingatthedullfirewithfierceenergy。We'renotdeadyet,sonny。No,bytheLordJesusGodforgivemenothalfdead。
Dublinwasanewandcomplexsensation。UncleCharleshadgrownsowitlessthathecouldnolongerbesentoutonerrandsandthedisorderinsettlinginthenewhouseleftStephenfreerthanhehadbeeninBlackrock。Inthebeginninghecontentedhimselfwithcirclingtimidlyroundtheneighbouringsquareor,atmost,goinghalfwaydownoneofthesidestreetsbutwhenhehadmadeaskeletonmapofthecityinhismindhefollowedboldlyoneofitscentrallinesuntilhereachedthecustomhouse。Hepassedunchallengedamongthedocksandalongthequayswonderingatthemultitudeofcorksthatlaybobbingonthesurfaceofthewaterinathickyellowscum,atthecrowdsofquayportersandtherumblingcartsandtheill-dressedbeardedpoliceman。ThevastnessandstrangenessofthelifesuggestedtohimbythebalesofmerchandisestockedalongthewallsorswungaloftoutoftheholdsofsteamerswakenedagaininhimtheunrestwhichhadsenthimwanderingintheeveningfromgardentogardeninsearchofMercedes。AndamidthisnewbustlinglifehemighthavefanciedhimselfinanotherMarseillebutthathemissedthebrightskyandthesum-warmedtrellisesofthewineshops。
Avaguedissatisfactiongrewupwithinhimashelookedonthequaysandontheriverandontheloweringskiesandyethecontinuedtowanderupanddowndayafterdayasifhereallysoughtsomeonethateludedhim。
Hewentonceortwicewithhismothertovisittheirrelatives:andthoughtheypassedajovialarrayofshopslitupandadornedforChristmashismoodofembitteredsilencedidnotleavehim。Thecausesofhisembittermentweremany,remoteandnear。Hewasangrywithhimselfforbeingyoungandthepreyofrestlessfoolishimpulses,angryalsowiththechangeoffortunewhichwasreshapingtheworldabouthimintoavisionofsqualorandinsincerity。
Yethisangerlentnothingtothevision。Hechronicledwithpatiencewhathesaw,detachinghimselffromitandtastingitsmortifyingflavourinsecret。
Hewassittingonthebacklesschairinhisaunt'skitchen。Alampwithareflectorhungonthejapannedwallofthefireplaceandbyitslighthisauntwasreadingtheeveningpaperthatlayonherknees。Shelookedalongtimeatasmilingpicturethatwassetinitandsaidmusingly:——
ThebeautifulMabelHunter!
Aringlettedgirlstoodontiptoetopeeratthepictureandsaidsoftly:——
Whatisshein,mud?——
Inapantomime,love。
Thechildleanedherringlettedheadagainsthermother'ssleeve,gazingonthepicture,andmurmuredasiffascinated:——
ThebeautifulMabelHunter!
Asiffascinated,hereyesrestedlonguponthosedemurelytauntingeyesandshemurmureddevotedly:——
Isn'tsheanexquisitecreature?
Andtheboywhocameinfromthestreet,stampingcrookedlyunderhisstoneofcoal,heardherwords。Hedroppedhisloadpromptlyonthefloorandhurriedtohersidetosee。Hemauledtheedgesofthepaperwithhisreddenedandblackenedhands,shoulderingherasideandcomplainingthathecouldnotsee。
Hewassittinginthenarrowbreakfastroomhighupintheolddark-windowedhouse。Thefirelightflickeredonthewallandbeyondthewindowaspectralduskwasgatheringupontheriver。Beforethefireanoldwomanwasbusymakingteaand,asshebustledatthetask,shetoldinalowvoiceofwhatthepriestandthedoctorhadsaid。Shetoldtooofcertainchangestheyhadseeninheroflateandofheroddwaysandsayings。Hesatlisteningtothewordsandfollowingthewaysofadventurethatlayopeninthecoals,archesandvaultsandwindinggalleriesandjaggedcaverns。
Suddenlyhebecameawareofsomethinginthedoorway。Askullappearedsuspendedinthegloomofthedoorway。Afeeblecreaturelikeamonkeywasthere,drawnthitherbythesoundofvoicesatthefire。Awhiningvoicecamefromthedoorasking:——
IsthatJosephine?
Theoldbustlingwomanansweredcheerilyfromthefireplace:——
No,Ellen,it'sStephen——
OO,goodevening,Stephen。
Heansweredthegreetingandsawasillysmilebreakoverthefaceinthedoorway——
Doyouwantanything,Ellen?askedtheoldwomanatthefire。
Butshedidnotanswerthequestionandsaid:——
IthoughtitwasJosephine。IthoughtyouwereJosephine,Stephen。
And,repeatingthisseveraltimes,shefelltolaughingfeebly。
Hewassittinginthemidstofachildren'spartyatHarold'sCross。
Hissilentwatchfulmannerhadgrownuponhimandhetooklittlepartinthegames。Thechildren,wearingthespoilsoftheircrackers,dancedandrompednoisilyand,thoughhetriedtosharetheirmerriment,hefelthimselfagloomyfigureamidthegaycockedhatsandsunbonnets。
Butwhenhehadsunghissongandwithdrawnintoasnugcorneroftheroomhebegantotastethejoyofhisloneliness。Themirth,whichinthebeginningoftheeveninghadseemedtohimfalseandtrivial,waslikeasoothingairtohim,passinggailybyhissenses,hidingfromothereyesthefeverishagitationofhisbloodwhilethroughthecirclingofthedancersandamidthemusicandlaughterherglancetravelledtohiscorner,flattering,taunting,searching,excitinghisheart。
Inthehallthechildrenwhohadstayedlatestwereputtingontheirthings:thepartywasover。Shehadthrownashawlaboutherand,astheywenttogethertowardsthetram,spraysofherfreshwarmbreathflewgailyabovehercowledheadandhershoestappedblithelyontheglassyroad。
Itwasthelasttram。Thelankbrownhorsesknewitandshooktheirbellstotheclearnightinadmonition。Theconductortalkedwiththedriver,bothnoddingofteninthegreenlightofthelamp。Ontheemptyseatsofthetramwerescatteredafewcolouredtickets。Nosoundoffootstepscameupordowntheroad。Nosoundbrokethepeaceofthenightsavewhenthelankbrownhorsesrubbedtheirnosestogetherandshooktheirbells。
Theyseemedtolisten,heontheupperstepandsheonthelower。Shecameuptohisstepmanytimesandwentdowntohersagainbetweentheirphrasesandonceortwicestoodclosebesidehimforsomemomentsontheupperstep,forgettingtogodown,andthenwentdown。Hisheartdanceduponhermovementslikeacorkuponatide。Heheardwhathereyessaidtohimfrombeneaththeircowlandknewthatinsomedimpast,whetherinlifeorrevery,hehadheardtheirtalebefore。Hesawherurgehervanities,herfinedressandsashandlongblackstockings,andknewthathehadyieldedtothemathousandtimes。Yetavoicewithinhimspokeabovethenoiseofhisdancingheart,askinghimwouldhetakehergifttowhichhehadonlytostretchouthishand。AndherememberedthedaywhenheandEileenhadstoodlookingintothehotelgrounds,watchingthewaitersrunningupatrailofbuntingontheflagstaffandthefoxterrierscamperingtoandfroonthesunnylawnandhow,allofasudden,shehadbrokenoutintoapealoflaughterandhadrundowntheslopingcurveofthepath。
Now,asthen,hestoodlistlesslyinhisplace,seeminglyatranquilwatcherofthescenebeforehim——
Shetoowantsmetocatchholdofher,hethought。That'swhyshecamewithmetothetram。IcouldeasilycatchholdOfherwhenshecomesuptomystep:nobodyislooking。Icouldholdherandkissher。
Buthedidneither:and,whenhewassittingaloneinthedesertedtram,hetorehisticketintoshredsandstaredgloomilyatthecorrugatedfootboard。
Thenextdayhesatathistableinthebareupperroomformanyhours。
Beforehimlayanewpen,anewbottleofinkandanewemeraldexercise。
Fromforceofhabithehadwrittenatthetopofthefirstpagetheinitiallettersofthejesuitmotto:A。M。D。G。Onthefirstlineofthepageappearedthetitleoftheverseshewastryingtowrite:ToE-C。HeknewitwasrighttobeginsoforhehadseensimilartitlesinthecollectedpoemsofLordByron。Whenhehadwrittenthistitleanddrawnanornamentallineunderneathhefellintoadaydreamandbegantodrawdiagramsonthecoverofthebook。HesawhimselfsittingathistableinBraythemorningafterthediscussionattheChristmasdinnertable,tryingtowriteapoemaboutParnellonthebackofoneofhisfather'ssecondmoietynotices。Buthisbrainhadthenrefusedtograpplewiththethemeand,desisting,hehadcoveredthepagewiththenamesandaddressesofcertainofhisclassmates:RoderickKickhamJohnLawtonAnthonyMacSwineySimonMoonanNowitseemedasifhewouldfailagainbut,bydintofbroodingontheincident,hethoughthimselfintoconfidence。Duringthisprocessallthoseelementswhichhedeemedcommonandinsignificantfelloutofthescene。
Thereremainednotraceofthetramitselfnorofthetram-mennorofthehorses:nordidheandsheappearvividly。Theversestoldonlyofthenightandthebalmybreezeandthemaidenlustreofthemoon。Someundefinedsorrowwashiddenintheheartsoftheprotagonistsastheystoodinsilencebeneaththeleaflesstreesandwhenthemomentoffarewellhadcomethekiss,whichhadbeenwithheldbyone,wasgivenbyboth。AfterthisthelettersL。D。S。werewrittenatthefootofthepage,and,havinghiddenthebook,hewentintohismother'sbedroomandgazedathisfaceforalongtimeinthemirrorofherdressing-table。
Buthislongspellofleisureandlibertywasdrawingtoitsend。Oneeveninghisfathercamehomefullofnewswhichkepthistonguebusyallthroughdinner。Stephenhadbeenawaitinghisfather'sreturnfortherehadbeenmuttonhashthatdayandheknewthathisfatherwouldmakehimdiphisbreadinthegravy。ButhedidnotrelishthehashforthementionofClongoweshadcoatedhispalatewithascumofdisgust——
Iwalkedbangintohim,saidMrDedalusforthefourthtime,justatthecornerofthesquare——
ThenIsuppose,saidMrsDedalus,hewillbeabletoarrangeit。
ImeanaboutBelvedere——
Ofcoursehewill,saidMrDedalus。Don'tItellyouhe'sprovincialoftheordernow?——
Ineverlikedtheideaofsendinghimtothechristianbrothersmyself,saidMrsDedalus——
Christianbrothersbedamned!saidMrDedalus。IsitwithPaddyStinkandMickyMud?No,lethimsticktothejesuitsinGod'snamesincehebeganwiththem。They'llbeofservicetohiminafteryears。Thosearethefellowsthatcangetyouaposition——
Andthey'reaveryrichorder,aren'tthey,Simon?——
Rather。Theylivewell,Itellyou。YousawtheirtableatClongowes。
Fedup,byGod,likegamecocks。
MrDedaluspushedhisplateovertoStephenandbadehimfinishwhatwasonit——
Nowthen,Stephen,hesaid,youmustputyourshouldertothewheel,oldchap。You'vehadafinelongholiday——
O,I'msurehe'llworkveryhardnow,saidMrsDedalus,especiallywhenhehasMauricewithhim——
O,HolyPaul,IforgotaboutMaurice,saidMrDedalus。Here,Maurice!
Comehere,youthick-headedruffian!DoyouknowI'mgoingtosendyoutoacollegewherethey'llteachyoutospellc。a。t。cat。AndI'llbuyyouanicelittlepennyhandkerchieftokeepyournosedry。Won'tthatbegrandfun?
Mauricegrinnedathisfatherandthenathisbrother。
MrDedalusscrewedhisglassintohiseyeandstaredhardatbothhissons。Stephenmumbledhisbreadwithoutansweringhisfather'sgaze——
Bythebye,saidMrDedalusatlength,therector,orprovincialrather,wastellingmethatstoryaboutyouandFatherDolan。You'reanimpudentthief,hesaid——
O,hedidn't,Simon!——
Nothe!saidMrDedalus。Buthegavemeagreataccountofthewholeaffair。Wewerechatting,youknow,andonewordborrowedanother。And,bytheway,whodoyouthinkhetoldmewillgetthatjobinthecorporation?
ButI`Iltellyouthatafter。Well,asIwassaying,wewerechattingawayquitefriendlyandheaskedmedidourfriendherewearglassesstill,andthenhetoldmethewholestory——
Andwasheannoyed,Simon?——
Annoyed?Nothe!Manlylittlechap!hesaid。
MrDedalusimitatedthemincingnasaltoneoftheprovincial。
FatherDolanandI,whenItoldthemallatdinneraboutit,FatherDolanandIhadagreatlaughoverit。YoubettermindyourselfFatherDolan,saidI,oryoungDedaluswillsendyouupfortwicenine。